Hijacked: Technical Q&A with Lennard Zinn RTMS

I have a lot of cycling-related fantasies: establishing our own nation with our own cheese; arranging a bike joust between Barack Obama on his dork-cycle and outspoken eco-nerd Ed Begley, Jr.; and of course the complete eradication of the pie plate. Unfortunately, all of these scenarios are pretty unlikely. But there is one fantasy of mine that's a bit more attainable, and that's taking over VeloNews tech guru Lennard Zinn's Q&A column. Sure, VeloNews isn't going to let me do that anytime soon, and I missed my best chance to steal his identity by not recovering his stolen laptop, but thanks to the internet (the ultimate tool for self-delusion) I can at least steal the questions from an already-published column and answer them myself on my own blog. So here goes:

Techical Q&A with Lennard Zinn Rip Torn’s Mug Shot – Time to replace?

Mix-and-match

Dear Lennard,

At one time I read in your column that you can change Campy 9-speed ergo shifters to 10-speed. Is this true and what are the details?

Guido

Dear Guido,

Sorry, Lennard stepped out for some Pringles, but allow me to help. My answer to your question is three-fold.

1) Yes, you can do it as long as they're not the old ones with the vestigial pointy tops. (Campy ergo levers used to have vestigial pointy tops before they realized people might actually want to put their hands there.)

2) The details are you stick a new shifty thingy in them.

3) I'm honestly surprised that in 2008 people a) still have 9 speed, and b) if they do would bother to “upgrade” to 10 speed at this point. Even though all you need to do is stick a new shifty thingy in them, you might as well throw them out because Campy is going to 11. This is a tremendous leap forward. It means: 1) you can have an 11-21 straight block; 2) those neutral wheel service techs will once again have to work for a living since not everything’s 10 speed anymore; 3) you can have a 20-30 straight block (in the event they decide to make one for some crazy reason). Also, best of all, it means that the Spinal Tap "it goes to 11" reference may finally be beaten completely to death, which would be great, because I'd love never to hear it in relation to road component groups again.

I should warn you, though—if you do go for the new 11 speed Campagnolo, it’s ugly. Really ugly. It looks like the bastard child of a Shimano STI and a Mektronic lever. Although if you’ve already got one of those stupid Pinarello Onda forks then the new Campy is a must-have if you want to retain that melting theme throughout the front end of the bike.

--RTMS

When to replace?

Dear Lennard,

I have two Shimano 10-speed groups: Dura-Ace and Ultegra. I've put about 3000 miles on both groups (I ride my Ultegra bike a lot more in crits and early season training), but I've noticed, aside from the shifting, that my pedal stroke seems "easier" and more supple with Dura-Ace.

So, I have a few questions for you:

1) What's the average lifespan of Dura-Ace and Ultegra bottom brackets? Do I need a new Ultegra bottom bracket?

2) Is there any easy way to determine when they're about to go (other than mileage)?

3) With the old spindled bottom brackets you could rotate the bearings by hand and "feel" the drag/crunch/friction indicative of a need for a new bottom bracket. Now, it's a guess based on "ease" of spinning the cranks, and that can be dependent upon bearing load?

4) Do you know the bearing-loading values for Dura-Ace and Ultegra bottom brackets (would I use a torque wrench for that)?

5) Have you heard of or had experience with the bearing overhaul kit, which I believe is made by Phil Wood?

Mark

Hi, Mark. Sorry, Lennard stepped out to take his ferret for a walk, but allow me to help. The reason your Dura-Ace feels "easier" and "more supple" is that you paid more for it. I always find it puzzling that people reserve Dura-Ace for the fair weather race bike, and use Ultegra or lower for the rain bike or beater bike. Since Dura-Ace is the best, wouldn't that be the logical choice for adverse conditions, since theoretically it should hold up better? I mean, it has "Dura" in the name. At any rate, to answer your questions:

1) You can kill a bottom bracket in about 35 seconds by installing it improperly, yet it can live nearly forever if you rarely use it. (Barring nuclear catastrophe, asteroids colliding with the Earth, Fixed-Gear Apocalypse, and so on.) So by averaging 35 seconds and 100,000 years, I come up with 1,567,800,000,018 seconds. So that is the average lifespan of your bottom bracket. Do you need a new Ultegra unit? If you're somewhere inside that window, maybe.

2) Get two mixing bowls. Fill one with plain yogurt, and the other with macaroni and cheese at room temperature. Place a wooden spoon in each. Then, remove the chain from your front chainrings and spin your crank. Next, stir each bowl with the wooden spoon. Which bowl does your crank most feel like when turned? If it feels more like the bowl filled with plain yogurt, then it's got anywhere from tens to trillions of seconds to go. If it feels more like the bowl of mac and cheese, consider replacement.

3) It can. Really, are you honestly this obsessed with bottom brackets?

4) No, I don't. Who cares? Yes, you would use a torque wrench for that--if you're a gigantic dork. I mean, using a torque wrench on the actual cups is one thing, but for the preload?!? Do you use a torque wrench to turn off your faucet, or to flush your toilet, or to replace the lid on your half-drunk Snapple? Take a risk!!! How wrong can you really go here?

5) Are you really obsessed to the point that you're ready to give money to Phil Wood? Patronizing Phil Wood is like going to an expensive therapist--this is an entire company based on assuaging the anal and neurotic. Take any normal, properly-funcioning component, like your bottom bracket. Even though it's perfectly fine and more or less incapable of failing catastrophically, you're checking it every day, writing letters to VeloNews, and waiting for it to fail like some kind of nutcase hunkering in a basement bracing yourself for a hurricane that's never going to come. Well, thank goodness for you there's Phil. What they do is make essentially the same exact thing you already have but charge you about three times as much for it because it has a special oil in it. (Or, they make some kind of "overhaul kit" for what you already have that essentially replaces the internals with the same thing. It’s like getting a heart transplant you don’t need.) That way, you can relax, knowing you paid for the "best." So, yeah, if you can't sleep at night due to the fear that your bottom bracket might explode in the night and take you with it, by all means, buy the Phil Wood thing.

--RTMS


Regarding rolling resistance of clinchers v. tubulars discussed in a prior column:

Dear Lennard,

I suggest you look at biketechreview.com. The range of the Coefficient of Rolling Resistance (Crr) for tires in the test, performed on a PVC drum, are similar to the range of Crr for clinchers and tubulars in the Chester Kyle study, published in Bicycling, May 1985. The Kyle study was done on smooth asphalt and low speed trike.

It is obvious that the steel drum used in the Tour magazine study magnifies the differences between tires, the question is how much. Tubulars do not perform well on a steel drum because of the small contact area and the resultant squirming or glue compression. The difference on the road is minimal. In a test done by Triathlon magazine (September 2006), the same six sewups, eight clinchers were tested on both a concrete indoor track and a steel drum. After adjusting for tire load and speed, the range of variability (defined in watts) for the six sewups on the drum was 2.24 times higher (my calculation) than on concrete. For clinchers the range of variability was 1.76 times.

Bottom Line: "Rolling resistance is very close on smooth road surfaces between clinchers and tubulars. Individual tires of either group may have better or worse rolling resistance".

Terry

Hi, Terry. Sorry, Lennard stepped out to enter a Peter Coyote look-alike contest, but allow me to help. Firstly, I couldn’t and didn’t read that. Secondly, are you still seriously confused about the difference between tubulars and clinchers? One involves glue, one doesn't. Take your pick. The real difference is in the rims, not the tires. Tubular rims and clincher rims have different weight and performance characteristics. If you want to use tubular rims, use tubular tires. If you want to use clincher rims, use clincher tires. If you're unsure, use one tubular wheel and one clincher wheel. That way you can't lose. Come on, do you decide between a sports car and a speedboat by comparing the ergonomics of the steering wheels?

--RTMS

Regarding orthotic construction from a previous column, I received some feedback about different approaches:

Dear Lennard,

I am a podiatrist and the pedorthotist's response to proper casting technique for custom orthotics is off-base.

Semi-weight-bearing casting defeats the purpose of creating a properly supportive device. It's difficult to be consistent between patients when utilizing this technique and one should simply use a heat moldable device if this approach is to be used. Yes, the foot compresses and the "arch" lowers and if done properly a non-weight-bearing casting simulating weight bearing by slight loading of the foot in its "neutral" position is the correct way to cast a patient.

Instructions can be given for "posting" of the devices if additional correction is needed. The foam impressions are a quick and easy way to cast but simply does not capture the true simulated semi-weight-bearing that is needed. Also, full-length devices may be appropriate, but if room is needed in the toe box area, a 3/4 cut top cover can be applied to the device without sacrificing any support supplied by the orthotic.

S.C. MurphyDPM

Dear Lennard,

Thanks for addressing the orthotic question. I enjoyed the article and comments by Russel Bollig.

No doubt he has the experience and athletes to stand behind what he says. Because I'm a cyclist and a health provider, I can appreciate the value of orthotics in a cycling shoe. You might say it's the reason I'm still training and racing.

I would, however, like to add a couple comments. I've been making cycling orthotics for a few years now using a neutral, non-weight-bearing cast, which has benefits worthy of mention. In my experience it's not so much about the arch as much as it is a combination of addressing the forefoot/rearfoot relationship, as well as the arch.

The craftsmanship you mentioned required to modify a positive cast's arch to address soft-tissue displacement really isn't a difficult task for an experienced tech, as it involves much less guesswork. I don't have any issues with this step, especially because there are so many benefits to a non-weight-bearing cast.

Because the forefoot/rearfoot is better captured with non-weight-bearing casts, it's much easier to post the forefoot accordingly for the patient's needs. Proper forefoot alignment is what in my experience really makes the difference in proper knee alignment while pedaling, also the basis for Paul Swift's BigMeat wedges.

For a more complete article, please read a recent article I wrote.

Dr. Rich Cimadoro

Sorry, Lennard stepped out to claim his third-place prize in a Peter Coyote look-alike contest. (A bucket of wings from KFC if you're wondering.) Orthotics aside, since you're both doctors, can I ask you guys a question? Just testing out a personal theory. Does either one of you ride a Serotta? I'm guessing at least one of you does. Am I right? Also, theoretically, can the casting techniques you describe be employed in penis gourd fabrication? I was intrigued by the reference to "Big Meat."

--RTMS

Five Grounds for Immediate Equipment Reappropriation

Unlike drugs, motor vehicles, and firearms (well, in some states) anybody anywhere can walk into any bike shop and buy whatever they want—provided they’ve got the money. And while I’m all for shops making a profit, I just don’t think that’s right. Yes, I’ll come right out and say it—not everybody deserves to have whatever they want. I think there should be a strict set of criteria that a customer should meet before he or she is allowed to buy something. (Which is why no investors ever seem interested in my business plan for "Fascist Cycles.")

I also don’t think that this equipment regulation should stop at the retail level. I think it should also be enforced out in the world, well after the bikes and components have left the store. I envision a network of officers and informants who would report violations of these rules, upon which bicycles would be confiscated. Here are just a few circumstances in which you should be forced to forfeit your bike or components:

You Don't Glue Your Own Tubulars

The mind-numbingly boring tubular-versus-clincher debate continues to rage, as it undoubtedly will for all eternity. And as far as which one you prefer, I couldn’t care less. What I cannot stand, however, are riders who use tubulars but cannot glue them by themselves. Instead, they have a shop do it. (This may not be common everywhere, but it sure is here in NYC, where everyone seems to have more money than time.) And while I suppose I’d rather ride behind a guy whose tires were glued by a shop than by some idiot who stuck them on with some Elmer’s glue and a popsicle stick, I still think that if you don’t install your own tires you should have your wheels taken from you. Tubular gluing is an old, ritualistic cycling practice, and riding the tires without putting them on yourself is like sending someone else to your local house of worship to do your praying for you.

You Don't Tape Your Own Bars

Yes, it’s true, a lot of riders can’t and don’t tape their own bars. This is like being 40 and swinging by your parents’ house on the way to work to have them knot your tie for you. If you’ve owned a drop-bar bike for more than six months, either learn how to wrap ‘em or fork that sucker over.

You're Wealthy and You Don't Transport Your Bike Properly

I’m not a communist and I’m not Amish. Some people have money and they want nice cars. Fine. And sometimes you need to transport your bike someplace, like a race or a far-off group ride. Okay. But what I cannot stand is when I see a brand-new Mercedes or BMW pull up at the start, and the driver proceeds to wrestle his $7,000 Colnago out from the back seat. I mean come on! You’ve got the money, get a goddamn rack! The only explanation I can possibly come up with for this behavior is that there’s a spouse at home who does not want the statusmobile marred by unsightly load bars and fairings. Well, you know what? If you’ve reached a point in your life where you’re successful enough to afford all this stuff, yet you can’t put your foot down and give cycling the pride-of-place in your life that it deserves, then hand over that shiny piece of Euro-plastic. Or at least get one of those stupid removable trunk racks. Is a leather seat riddled with chainring holes somehow preferable to a Thule?

And don’t tell me you keep the bike in the car to save gas. If you cared you’d have bought a Civic.

You Don't Meet the "Dollar-a-Mile" Qualification

We’ve all seen the “too much bike” phenomenon in action. You know, the guy who buys the absurdly expensive team replica bike and rides it around the park a few times a summer in sneakers. Sorry, this is not acceptable. I think a very fair and accommodating rule is that you must meet the “Dollar-a-Mile” qualification in order to keep possession of your bike. Example: let’s say you paid $5,000 for your bike. You should then be able to prove that you ride at least 5,000 miles a year—which isn’t all that much given the fact that $5,000 buys a pretty serious bike. 5,000 miles a year is less than 100 miles a week. I think that gives plenty of latitude. And you can buy as many other bikes as you want, without additional mileage requirements. The only requirement is that you must ride annually at least the number of miles appropriate for your most expensive bicycle. Simple! And if you don’t? Repo time.

You Are a Serial Upgrader

Everybody wants nice stuff. Fine. But if you are not a professional bike racer and you own components made by companies such as AX Lightness, Lightweight, or Schmolke, or if you train on carbon wheels, or if your credit card starts vibrating when you hear words like “integrated,” “proprietary,” or “stiff yet compliant,” you have a problem. If this is you, your bicycle should be taken from you for no less than six months. At the end of that time you will then be permitted to buy a bicycle at a retail price of no more than $1,000, which you must then ride for no less than one full year without changing any components whatsoever. At the end of that year we’ll see where you are, and we’ll take it from there.

It's All in the Details: Bicycle Acoustics

As cyclists many of us pay close attention to the performance, comfort, and aesthetic aspects of our bikes. However, I see way too many riders who neglect an equally-important consideration: the way their bicycles sound.

A bike noise is the equivalent of an STD. You can neglect it and the symptoms might go away for awhile, but they'll always reappear--and eventually it will drive you insane. Bike noises and STDs also share the same stigma: when I sit next to someone at a bar with a cold sore, I move over a stool; when I ride up to someone with a cacophonous bike, I give a wide birth.

For the aurally disinclined, here are just a few of the most obvious and egregious noises. If you don't love yourself or your bike enough to take care of them, then at least do it for the rest of us:

Bottom Bracket Creaking

(Look how simple and harmless! Take it out, pet it, and put it back.)

This is the cold sore of the bike world. Almost everybody gets it at one time or another. But unlike a cold sore, you can get rid of bottom bracket creaking by (this may come as a revelation) reinstalling or replacing your bottom bracket!

Every rider should aquire the tools and know-how to do this. Go to Sheldon Brown or the Park Tools site and figure it out. Why are people so afraid of their bottom brackets, like they're rabid ferrets living in their bottom bracket shells that will bite off their fingers if they try to coax them out? There are few things more sickening to me than a shiny, new, high-end road bike creaking like the floorboards of an old Victorian, or a fixed gear straining up the incline of the Brooklyn Bridge with a drivetrain that crunches like footfalls on newly-fallen snow.

Drivetrain Noise

(Chirp, chirp, chirp.)

Some drivetrain noise is inevitable and therefore acceptable. The following noises are unacceptable:

Squeaky Chain You should never allow your drivetrain to sound like a nest of baby rats pining for their mothers' teat. Clean chain if necessary and re-lube. (You don't need anything fancy. Motor oil will do just fine.)

Chattering Between Gears If your chain spends 30 seconds chattering like a roomful of yentas before engaging a new sprocket after you shift, take the time to adjust your derailleur. You may need to replace worn drivetrain components or cables.

Grinding This is sometimes a matter of technique. Your bicycle is an instrument and you should know how to play it. I see far too many riders on all manner of bicycles riding around in gear combinations that make their drivetrains sound like a medieval drawbridge descending over a moat. Learn how to shift! Unless you're in a race and either don't have the time or can't risk a chain-drop by shifting into the small ring, don't ride crossed-over. There are other sites that go into this in more detail. I'll just say aquire some grace and leave it at that. (Maybe this explains the fixie craze--too many people can't wrap their heads around proper shifting.)

Rattly Goddamn Zipps

More and more people are spending ungodly sums on obnoxious, overpriced deep-dish carbon fiber wheelsets to give them that essential edge in those hotly-contested Cat 4 races. As a consequence, more and more people's bikes are emitting a hideous racket as their ten-centimeter long valve stems wriggle around in the rim. It's starting to sound like a field of rattlesnakes out there, and it's pissing me off. Coupled with that "whoosh-woosh-woosh" they emit when the rider struggles up a moderate incline, it's enough to make you want to stick a pump through their bladed spokes.

Now I don't use these things, but if you do figure out something! Cyclingnews recently revealed a clever pro mechanic trick I thought was very resourceful. Get creative or get normal wheels. If you can't figure it out, you shouldn't be allowed to ride it.

Acceptable Noise

Perhaps the most amazing thing to me about bike noise is that people will tolerate all of the above, but then will complain about perfectly acceptable and desireable noises. One of these noises is loud freehubs. I have seen many, many posts in forums asking how to quiet a rear hub while coasting, or decrying a high-end hub for its loud buzzing sound, or asking what the quietest rear hub is.

Um, a loud hub or freewheel is good! That buzzing is the ratchet on which your crotch depends doing its job! If those pawls quiet down, you're dangerously close to making hard and fast love to your top tube. (If you simply must have a bike that coasts quietly, get some Shimano hubs which are engineered to do so.)

I Implore and Entreat You

If your bike starts making noise, get to the bottom of it immediately. This might be obvious, but your bike is telling you it needs help. This is also a great opportunity to learn the workings of your bike if you don't know them already. Remove, inspect, and replace one thing at a time. Resist the urge to just drop it off at the shop and have them cure it. Your bike needs intensive care at this time, and no shop has the man-hours or time to do that. I've had bikes that took weeks to diagnose, during which I practically maintained candle-light vigils, banishing all other distractions from my life until the problem was solved. If you're not prepared for this level of dedication, perhaps bike ownership is not for you. Golf clubs never make noise.

Overheard in the Shop (or, "Learn to Wrench or Shut Up!")

A lot of people complain about bike shops, particularly about attitude from the staff. And while some shops undoubtedly have their own iterations of Jack Black in "High Fidelity," just as often the problem really lies with the customer. (And yes, this is another fixie-related post. I don't mean to be all-fixie all-the-time, but with them being so popular there's a lot of irritating stuff in my face these days.)

Example: I was in a downtown shop I regularly patronize. Good shop, good guys. Believe me when I say this shop exudes no attitude whatsoever. Anyway, while I was there a couple of guys come in with their shiny fixies (and shiny tattoos, riding in sneakers, and so forth). One of them wants his bottom bracket tightened, and is outraged that they want to charge him.

Firstly, he says, "I bought my bike here." Good for you. Yes, most shops have free adjustments if you buy a bike there. Like, they'll tighten your cables to make your shifting crisper. They're not going to pull and re-install your bottom bracket six months later for nothing.

Secondly, he's outraged at the proposed price, because, "It's just tightening it with an Allen wrench."

No, it's not! That is not how a bottom bracket works! You have to remove the crankarms, remove the bottom bracket, lube everything, re-install, etc. Plus, he had a Dura Ace crank. (Because, after all, you need the stiffness of a DA crank when you ride in sneakers.) Those bottom brackets require an extra level of adjustment. It's like getting mad because your car needs a new starter and telling the mechanic, "It's only taking it out with a screwdriver!"

Now I'm sure this guy will go around and talk shit about this "ripoff" shop. All they wanted to do was fix his problem, and while re-installing a bottom bracket isn't the hardest thing in the word, it does take some time. And time, like it or not, is money.

More importantly, if you're going to ride around on a fixie, trying to look cool with your MTB bars cut way too short because you saw a messenger do it, then please, at least gain a working knowledge of your bike!

Working on bikes is not hard, and working on a fixed gear is about as easy as it gets. There are virtually no parts! Don't want to pay for the labor? Then buy the damn tools and do it yourself!

Yes--you should absolutely be ashamed to ride around on a fixie with tattoos when you don't even know how your bottom bracket works, much less how to tighten it. And if you don't want to do the labor and need to have someone else do it, prepare to pay for it.

Want to learn to do the work yourself? Start off by checking out http://www.sheldonbrown.com/ as well as rec.bicycles.tech (easiest way to access is through Google groups).

That is all.