This Just In: Shofar, So Good!

Firstly, you may have noticed I haven't given a Friday Fun Quiz in awhile.

Good for you.

Secondly, I will not be updating this blog on Monday, October 3rd or Tuesday, October 4th, but I will return on Wednesday, October 5th with regular updates.  Why?  Because it's Rosh Hashanah, which is the Jewish New Year and not the name of a woman who's a progressive rock superfan and huge stoner.  (That's Rush Hash Anna I'm talking about, obviously.)  By the way, most Jewish holidays involve an accessory of some kind, and in this case it's the shofar:

Though Rush Hash Anna uses it for something else:

Do I observe Rush Hashanah?  Absolutely not.  Religion is the trans fat of the masses.  However, the schools are closed for it, which means I've got to put on my parenting gloves--and if I'm at the mercy of the New York City Department of Education then goddamn it so are you.

(Pro tip: if you want to have a good sense of when I'll be taking time off just take a look at the DOE website.)

Of course, if it's Rush Hash Anna then it must be autumn, and if it's autumn then it's time to get the ol' Milwaukee ready for the cold and the wet by slapping some fenders on it:

And yes, you'll be happy to know I dug out the safety fenders with the breakaway struts so I don't bust a digit again.  My thumb's still not right after all these months, and you can believe me when I tell you it's really thrown me off of my tire-changing game.

By the way, note my sweet artisanal kickstand, which of course I keep inside my EH Works tool roll at all times:

If you want one of these they're only $129.99, they're available for both standard BB shells as well as BB30, and you can order them here.

Just keep in mind that they're handmade one at a time, so allow at least 6-8 weeks for delivery.

In other news, I've finally lost my last remaining shred of faith in cycling and humanity thanks to this abomination:

Easy now, it's not a sign of the Apocalypse, and it's not that we've given up on the youth, it's merely another option, albeit an expensive, controversial option to get kids outside and on two wheels. Haibike's Sduro HardFour 4.0, along with its odd name, is an e-bike with 24in wheels and a top speed of 12mph with aspirations of allowing little riders to do bigger rides and keep up with mom and dad. 

No, this is ABSOLUTELY a sign of the Apocalypse.  And stop justifying things because they "get kids outside."  You can also get a kid outside by leaving a trail of cupcakes, pitching a tent, and setting an Xbox up inside it, but that doesn't make it a good idea.  In fact this is even worse than doing that because at least the Xbox trick will only cost you a few hundred bucks, whereas this bike costs well over $2,000:

Available now with pricing at £1,988, US$2,599, Australian pricing TBD.

Presumably the Australian pricing is pending whether or not it will ship with a full-face motorcycle helmet.

Also, "allowing little riders to do bigger rides and keep up with mom and dad," really?  That's a pretty expensive bribe just because you feel the need to do a grinduro™ epic® and you can't deal with finding a babysitter.  And not only are you squandering money, but you're also ruining your kids for bikes for the rest of their lives, because there's no way they'll want to pedal a regular bike after this.  It's sad to think that if I'm lucky to still be mountain biking in 20 years the trails will be teeming with people on ebikes because they can't imagine riding on anything else.

So thanks in advance to all you selfish parents out there for ruining my golden years.

I guess I'll just have to lease a Toyota Avalon and move to Florida.

But it's not all gloom and doom out there, and I was pleased to see that the New York City Department of Transportation at least recognizes the need to grow the percentage of bicycle trips significantly:

Earlier this month, DOT released a blueprint for increasing bike mode share in its five-year strategic plan, which includes protected bike lanes and a five-borough Citi Bike system. The Office of Sustainability report also acknowledges that the city has a long way to go before cycling is an accessible transportation option in many parts of NYC.

“Despite the rapid growth in the city’s bicycle network, there are still many areas that lack sufficient bike connections,” the report says. “In addition to planned expansions, the City will emphasize an all-ages and abilities core network of protected bike lanes throughout the five boroughs, and the build-out of key connectors linking neighborhoods to transit hubs.”

Sounds good to me.

And hey, guess what's more dangerous than not wearing a helmet: simply breathing!

The report highlights the public health effects of high emissions. Fine particulate matter, or PM2.5, released by vehicles causes 320 premature deaths and 870 emergency room visits each year, according to the Department of Health and Mental Hygiene.

"The victim was not wearing a respirator."

Still, we're going to have to do a lot more than increase the number of bike lanes if we really want to increase cycling, and I was impressed to see that London's mayor is looking to ban trucks that don't meet increased safety standards:

Although lorries account for just 4 per cent of the total mileage driven in London, they account for a hugely disproportionate percentage of casualties among vulnerable road users.

In the past two years, HGVs were involved in 58 per cent of cyclist deaths in London, and in 23 per cent of pedestrian fatalities.

Khan said the scheme was the first of its kind in the world and would result in many lorries being upgraded before the ban came into place.

“I’m not prepared to stand by and let dangerous lorries continue to cause further heartbreak and tragedy on London’s roads,” said Khan.

When asked to comment on whether or not such a policy on lorries could be instituted in New York City as a part of the Vision Zero initiative, mayor Bill de Blasio responded, "Huh, what?  Hugh Laurie?  Absolutely, I love his work."

(Bill de Blasio: Loves the "House" guy.)

The chances of any mayor in the greater metropolitan area standing up to any business involving trucks are essentially nonexistent:

And with that I ride befendered into the long weekend.  Thanks for reading, ride safe, and I'll see you back here on Wednesday, October 5th.

Sinsereley,



--Wildcat Rock Machine