To be perfectly honest, when I woke up this morning and read the horrible news from Brussels the Spring Classics were pretty much the last thing on my mind, but of course those who build their lives around these races now have to face the difficult question of how to proceed:
“For the moment, Dwars door Vlaanderen will take place tomorrow, despite the terrorist attacks that took place in Brussels on Tuesday morning,” the statement reads. “The organizers mourn with the victims of these terrible acts. More information in due time.”
The organizer said it will wait until Wednesday to make a final decision. The race director told NOS if the threat is still at level four, its one-day race will not go ahead as planned.
I suspect people there will find comfort in the racing going on as planned, so for their sake I hope it does and that it all goes smoothly. (Not literally smoothly; it is the Classics after all so I hope it's wet and bumpy.)
Anyway, in the wake of tragedy one searches for both inspiration and escape, and one can find both in this video of a BMX rider standing up for his rights:
Wow. That's so good you'd be forgiven for thinking it's scripted, but the fact is he's simply had a lot of practice due to constant harassment, and his delivery was less somewhat polished two (2) years ago:
Incidentally, the person who alerted me to the first video felt the BMXer went too far with the cop but I tend to disagree, because by now he must feel like he's living in "Groundhog Day."
Also, the cop totally deserved everything he got after that sorry Facebook line.
In other news, via a reader, if you laugh at this headline you'll feel guilty once you've read the article:
Police said the lead rider in the group of nine dodged the carcass but other cyclists clipped it, then hit an oncoming vehicle.
A man, reportedly in his 50s, was freed from beneath the vehicle.
He was flown to Melbourne's Alfred Hospital where he remains in a critical but stable condition.
The narrative arc of this particular piece of clickbait is, "Ha ha kangaroos, etc. Wait, he was airlifted to the hospital? Oh my god that's fucking awful!"
Even worse is that once in Melboure he was fined for not wearing the helmet paramedics had removed during the chopper ride.
Anyway, my thoughts are very much with the rider in critical condition, but not at all with the ride leader, who apparently failed to point out the fucking kangaroo carcass.
I mean seriously, you don't at least give a "Kangaroo up!" or something like that? Or is it normal in Australia to expect the riders behind you to bunnyhop a kangaroo carcass?
Meanwhile, remember I mentioned a new theft-proofing system called Hexlox? Well, their Kickstarter is now live:
I still think it's a clever idea, though a commenter did point out that there's already a similar product from Pitlock:
I see they're both in Germany too, so happy suing everybody!
Speaking of Germany, the Berliner Fahrradschau took place last week, and once again Specialized managed to piss a bunch of people off:
Specialized has become the latest bike company to be accused of sexism after it launched a limited edition “Playboy” version of its Turbo S e-bike at the Berlin Bike Show last week, complete with models dressed in Playboy bunny outifts.
The bike, which will only be available in Germany, is limited to 40 units and is “the result of a collaboration between two premium brands with an elegant black-gold finish with exclusive Playboy ornamental elements.”
Okay. Firstly, what were they thinking?
Secondly, how the hell do you market an e-bike and not use Femke?!?
("I can't believe they didn't hire me!")
Most importantly, what kind of Überdouche rides a Playboy-branded e-bike? That Dos Eqis "Stay Thirsty" guy? Donald Trump?
In any case, this being the ultimate middle-aged businessman bike, I hope it comes equipped with a full bolt-locking system because it's going to be spending a lot of time parked in the red light district.