Tuesday, October 20, 2015

The Indignity of Commuting by Bicycle: Living Here

New York City:


(Please note Philadelphia now stands in for New York City as our skyline has become way too expensive.)

You of course know it as the most bike-friendly city in America, and you'd better believe we're living up to that reputation, as this comment on yesterday's post makes abundantly clear:

vsk said ...

TIRE SPIKES !!! 2nd Ave + 14th Street NYC

I'll repeat it tomorrow because it's impOtent...

About 8 pm to 8:10 pm, someone put 6 tire spikes on the 2nd avenue bike lane about 30 feet north of the intersection of 14th street. 
I abruptly found this out as I got 2 flats. It felt like the bike ran over a stick and the tire shifted sideways and then the pssfssfssfss... I'm glad I had the idea to go back and look. 6 sheetmetal squares with the corners ripped and pointed in opposite directions were placed in the bike lane. Someone told me they are caltrops ... exactly as seen here...

The good - I think I was the first there as no one was doing any tire changes at the time. 
I got the things off the road so no one else would get screwed. 

Stopped by the precinct on 21st and 2nd. Stupid protest going on. They had their hands full. Called 311 ... "Did you remove them?" -Yes "That's commendable but I can't do anything".
I'll stop by the precinct on the way home and file something... 

Watch out for these things now...

vsk

Sounds about right.  Someone (or somesones, which is the plural of "someone") used to scatter thumbtacks in the Central Park roadway to stymie the old night ride, and I fell victim to that ploy once or twice back when I was a young Fred.  This attack does seem a bit more concerted though, at least judging from the spikes to which "vsk" linked:


These Ninja caltrops are the perfect addition to your ninja bag. No matter how they land, there is always a sharp edge pointing up.

--Great for booby traps
--Stainless steel construction
--Set of 10

I love that there are apparently lots of delusional role players out there pretending to be ninjas by carrying "ninja bags" and chasing each-other around barefoot.

Until now I thought ninjas were the embodiment of lethality, but evidently you can easily thwart them by wearing a sturdy pair of shoes.

Meanwhile, here's "Vision Zero" in action:


Cops doled out fewer tickets to bad drivers in Williamsburg’s Hasidic neighborhoods because the de Blasio administration covets their votes and needs to keep them happy, a source said.

“They pander and he gives them a lot of what they want,” a former mayoral liaison said. “De Blasio is known to have tight ties to the Hasidic community.”

Moving violations in the 90th Precinct, which includes an enclave of 70,000 ultra-religious Orthodox Jews, plummeted 32 percent since de Blasio took office, NYPD records show.

Wow, no "Oy Vey-sion Zero" headline?!?

The Post really dropped the matzoh ball on that one.

Religious leaders “get in with the Police Department and do their thing,” the former official said. “I’ll tell you one thing, they didn’t all take driver’s ed and change their driving habits.”

No they did not--though they are brainwashing their young about helme(n)ts:

If you want to know why New York City's unofficial slogan is "No Criminality Suspected," it's because if you ticket religious groups who vote in blocs they won't vote for you, and if you attempt to hold union members accountable for running people over they'll sue your ass, but if you mess with cyclists the worst they'll do is put some flowers in the bike lane:

Ooh, scaaary!

They should have put helme(n)ts on top of the cones, because as I can understand it they're like Kryptonite to drivers and repel any and all danger.

Meanwhile, every so often I wonder why I still live here.  After all, there are certainly better places to ride a bike, and due to late-onset food allergies I can't eat pizza or bagels anymore, so really what's left for me here?  Therefore, in an attempt to convince myself otherwise, I headed off for a ride and immediately fell back in love with the city again.  For example, there's the inspiring architecture:


(Municipal Flat Block 18A, Linear North)

This particular stretch of the Harlem River always makes me think of this scene from "A Clockwork Orange:"


Then there's the ironic signage:


(Reduced from what?  Before they built the bridge?)

I'm sure I've mentioned this sign before, but I'm still wondering to what sort of vehicle this sign could possibly apply.

Seems to me you could fit a battleship under there.

Then there's the streetscape:


I really need to throw a pair of old Sidis up there.

And of course Central Park:


For a moment I imagined this was genuine non-Cat 6 helme(n)tless bike traffic, but as I passed them I realized they were all European tourists.

Oh well.

Of course one of the only noticeable effects of Vision Zero on cyclists is that the NYPD will now ticket the fuck out of you for running a light on your bike in Central Park, so I made sure to stop at this one, especially because there was a police car lying in wait--though as I came to a stop the police drove right through the red light just as a bunch of pedestrians were entering the crosswalk:


I like when they lead by example.

Best of all, that fall crispness is in the air, bringing with it a new wave of seasonal allergies as well as the setting up for the New York City Marathon:


By this time I was hungry, so I decided to get a slice of pizza, and then I remembered I can't eat pizza anymore so I just sat under the bleachers and cried.

Of course I could always just move away from New York and only visit when I feel like riding like an asshole, just like Lucas Brunelle does:



I think we all know that any type of bike is faster than any type of car in mid-day Manhattan crosstown traffic, but the outcome might have been different if Brunelle had encountered some tire spikes.

In any case, I'm sure Specialized is preparing a lawsuit since he raced a McLaren without promoting a Venge in a masturbatory fashion:


It will be a long time before anyone out-Freds that review.

129 comments:

DB said...

Morning!

Dorothy Rabinowitz said...

Scanular Condition: shrivelled

Anonymous said...

Numero Uno! Scranus

Anonymous said...

first?

Anonymous said...

Weeener!!

Anonymous said...

Boink!

Unknown said...

68. It may be objected that primitive man is physically less secure than modern man, as is shown by his shorter life expectancy; hence modern man suffers from less, not more than the amount of insecurity that is normal for human beings. But psychological security does not closely correspond with physical security. What makes us FEEL secure is not so much objective security as a sense of confidence in our ability to take care of ourselves. Primitive man, threatened by a fierce animal or by hunger, can fight in self-defense or travel in search of food. He has no certainty of success in these efforts, but he is by no means helpless against the things that threaten him. The modern individual on the other hand is threatened by many things against which he is helpless: nuclear accidents, carcinogens in food, environmental pollution, war, increasing taxes, invasion of his privacy by large organizations, nationwide social or economic phenomena that may disrupt his way of life.

Anonymous said...

Out-fredded for the podium.

P. Bateman said...

top tenant!! seriously, i always pay the rent on time.

Serial Retrogrouch said...

damn... bangers... haven't even moved my finger yet.

Hee Haw the Barista said...

FOOD LRGY

Anonymous said...

NYC may be a nice place to visit, but after creeping along I-95 recently (twice — once each direction), I’d say only by mass transit. *Living* there? fugheddaboudit.

DB said...

Trudeaumania in Canada!

Walked dog yesterday. I wore shorts, tshirt and flip flops. October 19th in Northwest Illinois. Should be putting snow fences up. Dog was dragging.
End of times.

Unknown said...

vsk said ...

lunching... be right back...

vsk

N/A said...

I have recently approached Specialized about my development of a Caltrop Grinder biekcycle. It will use a new wheel/tire size standard, and if you don't ride it, you will experience a Fredluxation on every ride in the city environs.

Spokey said...


wow

commentariat is on the roll today

P. Bateman said...

You didn't eat the pizza?

but i thought you were a gluten for punishment?

dnk said...

@vsk

Damn. Sorry that happened to you. Thanks for the heads up. I ride through there on my way home every day (yesterday, uneventfully, at about 5:15 p.m.)

PotbellyJoe said...

Brilliant post Snob, i had to share it thanks to the ironic signage that made me chortle.

If I couldn't eat pizza or bagels, my love for this area would be cut in half. Fortunately I'm possess masochistic traits (which is why I love riding a bike around here) so it would only make me more likely to stick around.

Plus I'd rather get digestive fits from good pizza and bagels than the bad ones everywhere else makes.

You know the difference between a Michigan bagel and a Michigan pizza? Toppings and diameter. It's all made with bread dough. At least the beer is good so you can be too drunk to care how awful everything else is. (I spent 15 years in MI, I get to complain.)

il Pirata est Mort said...

I have ground effects going on keeping me glued to the seat here at my desk. Whoops! I just blew up.

Anonymous said...

I went so hard I blew up.
Oh, he was talking about the bike?
Well, that's not what it sounded like.

Anonymous said...

Good one, Snob!

You are on a role with the brilliantly appropriate obscure references.

janinedm said...

I've had a pretty good run of commuting lately, so I'm going to brighten your day. I come down 5th ave in the mornings (it's lousy with traffic, but I'd rather ride down the East River (down the river; not next to it) that through Central Park. Anyway the morning sun was low and yellow, it being fall so the street was almost all in shade. 106th street is pretty wide, though so there was a big shaft of sunlight and the wind had it raining down leaves that caught the light even more in contrast to all the shade. Almost made me wish I was the picture taking type. The leaves looked like glitter. I shit you not. My phone's camera is so bad that enjoying the moment was the best use of my time, though. All I could do was say aloud, "hey pedestrians, look at that!" And they were like "ohh!" I also saw Jack McBrayer from 30 Rock on CPW. And I shared some miles and chit chat with two fellow commuters i see all the time. And, because of the cold when I turn my head there's no flying stream of sweat! Finally, we're getting into "nut man" season, where they sell the sugar coated nuts on the street which i never buy but l like riding through the smell of them. This is the life I tell ya!

ken e. said...

i am trying to write sentences, failing.

dop said...

Ugh...Lucas Brunelle...what was Casey Neistat (rhymes with Nice Tat) doing with him. He's come down a long way since Bike Lanes.

Mr. B said...

At times I had wanted to visit NYC but now that ninjas have taken over the city...nah...I'm good

Dorothy Rabinowitz said...

I just fucking railed it...and uhhh...went so hard I blew up!

Gator Joe said...

Get out, Snob, while you can. Head for the hills.
You really don't need NYC; it really is unnatural for a mass of people to be so tightly packed together; breeds agitation and contempt.
I hear the Hebrides are nice.

BamaPhred said...

Railing D Rab. The other choice was hucking over Ninja Caltrops.

N/A said...

There's always scuffing the ol' Brooks.

three way tie for last said...

casey neistat looks like he is wearing one of those Groucho Marx glasses with the plastic nose.

sad not funny

BikeSnobNYC said...

Gator Joe,

More than half of the world's population lives in cities so I think it is all too natural.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

That sign is for excessively high tall bikes on the bike trail.

Freddy Murcks said...

Brunelle is a fucking cunt. Not to put too fine a point on it, but I don't really know what more can be said on the topic.

As for the "Reduced Vertical Clearance," it looks like it's intended as a warning to hipster tallbikers who may be tempted to ride uptown after crossing over from Brooklyn. It's a filter of sorts.

Freddy Murcks said...

Dammit. I shoulda read RCT's comment before I made mine.

Roille Figners said...

Enough with your Fuck-O-ldian épistèmes!

dop said...

He Brides?

Reuben Fignerman said...

Oy-Veysion Zero - that's rich.

Other candidates:
Hasidim Zero
Gefilte Fish'n Zero
Vision Gvir-o

Bryan said...

Allergic to pizza AND bagels? You are living in Hell! Not just because you are in NYC, but being allergic to either of those things anywhere would suck so many balls. At least you still have beer.

I'm not overly enamored with NYC from my past experiences, but that's probably because the few times I have been there I ended up lost, in sticker shock at the prices of goods and services, and apart from the tourist sights didn't know where to go. There was also that one time I was with a group and one of the girls kept trying to find drugs.

I'm willing to give it another shot at some point, especially going there with a plan as opposed to a group of friends just winging it. I'll definitely have to visit the intersection Seemen and Cumming St.

Anonymous said...


”More than half of the world's population lives in cities so I think it is all too natural.”

Homo sapiens have been on this planet for about
200,000 years.

Cities have been around for less than
10,000 years,, maybe 5% of the time there have been humans.

Only a small fraction of the human populations lived in cities until the industrial revolution in the late 1700’s (250+/- years ago) The growth in urbanization accelerated and spread to the third world
after WWII (70 years ago.).

The quoted statistic, More than half of the world's population lives in cities, , only became true in the last 10 years.

You can argue that humans are part of nature so everything humans do is natural. But in fact the vast majority of people who ever lived did not live in cities.

janinedm said...

I'm not even mad at Brunelle any more. He makes me deeply sad now. I feel like Madonna would tell him to grow up and stop trying so hard.

...and I don't apologize for my horrendous punctuation above. It was stream on cnciousness and I've had a delightful October (though last week I did have a commercial truck veer into a shadow i was in, forcing me to purposely steer myself into a bunch of parked cars. But then there was a red light so i was able to hawk up a considerable loogie and spit all over his door handle. So yeah. Everything's coming up Milhouse, bike-wise. Sometime in the next few weeks I'm going to ride up to the Cloisters and wear a wool scarf and drink hot cider and keep crushing this autumn.)

Unknown said...

vsk said ...

Friend's leaving this job, we went to Croton Reservoir Tavern on 40th St. Did I have rabbit food and water? No... Mac + Cheese w Bacon please, and a side order of fries and a Diet Coke... no just kidding, a REAL Coke !

Now I want to get up real early and see JanineDM's commuteway and revel in it!

There are comments on that link for the spike things, evidently the ones you can get on Amazon are waaay sharper than the ones on that site. I'll shut up about it now. I'll check Nashbar for a sale on tubes + tires.

Be careful!

vsk

P. Bateman said...

snap!!! history dance off.

i'm gonna grab a box of cheez-it snacks for this 'cause its about to go down! down in history you could say.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 2:21pm,

By that logic it's not natural for us to walk upright either.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

The Librarian said...

OOK!

Sloppy Floyd said...

can I get this in 650B?

http://www.gizmag.com/bird-of-prey-bike/39930/

brother yam said...

Snobbie,

My wife has the same problems (I'm guessing gluten is the culprit here), and we were surprised recently that she can now eat bread and drink beer after avoiding it for years. We are Olds and the time has come for the dreaded colonoscopy. Since she's going to be uncomfortable anyway, she decided that now was the time for a pizza and beer. We downed the pizza and she had two beers and we waited for the inevitable GI fireworks. Nothing.

She was directed by her doctor to up her B vitamins and her Iron. We think that this has eased the gluten allergies. You may want to look into it. Your mileage may vary, but if it keeps the rumbling to a minimum and you can cheat a piece now and then...

Anonymous said...

I totally agree that riding bikes in NYC can be a hassle. But sometimes not. I have a nice before work ride that I do a few days a week from my apartment in the UWS, up Riverside drive, which has some of the nicest archeticture and views that you will see anywhere. In just 5 milesI'm across the GW bridge and into the Palisades interstate park in NJ riding on nearly empty roads surrounded by foliage and stunning views of the Hudson river and NYC. The ride is just over 20 miles, with 2,000 feet of climbing so it gets your heart going. It takes about 75 minutes round trip and I'm back home. A quick shower and a leisurely 3.5 mile ride to work to my mid-town office through central park, more beautiful scenery and much better now with no cars allowed above 72nd street. I unwind after a long day of work with a nice ride home up the Hudson river greenway taking in the beautiful colors of the Mighty Hudson as the sun goes down. I've done these routes hundreds of times and they never get old. My point is NYC can also be a fucking great place to ride and I'm not sure I would want to live anywhere else given all the other stuff on offer here.

Anonymous said...

vsk, you went to a bar and had a coke and are bragging about it?

BikeSnobNYC said...

brother yam,

It's not gluten, it's a wheat allergy. I can get away with eating it most of the time but I'm avoiding it to see if that solves my problems. (So far it has.)

--Wildcat Rock Machine

N/A said...

What's wrong with having a Coke?

P. Bateman said...

well there goes my gluten for punishment joke.

great. just great.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 2:45pm,

Yes, but the best part of your ride is in NJ!

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Roille Figners said...

About as many people lived in the last 1000 years, as during the first 5000 years, so I just wonder how vast that rural majority really is.

Human nature is to talk and work together, that's why there are cities. The reason "nature" is held up as an ideal is because cities are usually designed/planned without proper integration of nature, ironically including human nature, and people start to need an idealized place to "escape" to. It's unbalanced and polarized, like every other sphere where you find yourself thinking common sense should prevail more than it does.

Anonymous said...

”By that logic it's not natural for us to walk upright either.”

No.

Our hominid ancestors were walking upright for millions of years
before homo sapiens evolved. .

People have always walked upright.

leroy said...

Dear Mr. BSNYC --

My dog informs me that the native New Yorkers he interviewed cited culinary considerations similar to yours when responding to the question: Why live in NYC?

The top responses:

1. You can bring pizza home on the subway even if you have trouble walking upright.

2. Even the Dunkin' Donuts have decent bagels.

3. No need to move to the suburbs for KFC and Taco Bell.

4. So many food choices for the discerning palate.


N/A said...

The best thing about Dunkin' Donuts in NY is that they're all drive-through. Convenient!

leroy said...

Dear Mr. Anon @ 3:00 PM

My dog wonders if you are typing while erect.

He says that would make the blood rush out of your head.

I asked him what difference a standing desk would make, but he just rolled his eyes.

I must be missing something.

Anonymous said...

"About as many people lived in the last 1000 years, as during the first 5000 years, so I just wonder how vast that rural majority really is."

Depending on the definition of rural/suburban/urban, and your guess on world-wide human population through out
pre-history, the rural majority is something around 60% to 90%.

janinedm said...

I like riding in NJ ok, but I prefer to see other people. I find people watching in NYC to be even better than the food. Also, I see that this Mac decided to turn "sharrow" into "shadow." If I were riding in a shadow, veering into me would have been far more excusable. No criminality would have been suspected in any case. Anon 2:21, what are your thoughts on printed matter? Books are recent. Was man not meant to read?

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 3:00pm,

How could that be? With no books to place on their heads how could they practice?

--Wildcat Rock Machine

PS: You are taking this so seriously and it's awesome.

caged MonkeyMan(person)(entity) said...

Cities suck. But then walking upright sucks too. Plus everyone knows that Lender's bagels are the bomb

Spokey said...


snobs

Don't know how the men practicsd, but the women used cans of beer.

leroy said...

Well leave it to Mr. Figners @2:57 to espouse John Locke's view of the social contract.

My dog is more of a Hobbesian: man's state in nature is nasty, brutish, and short.

But I think he just uses that to support the observation that life is too short to drink cheap wine.

At least on my nickel.

I tend to agree with Mr. Figners.

And anyway, it's important to enjoy every sandwich.

Anonymous said...

BikeSnobNYC,

Not really, the NJ part is nice but as described in detail the NYC parts are also very nice.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 3:30pm,

I was mostly being ironical--though of course UWS to River Road is rather rarefied by NYC cycling standards...

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Roille Figners said...

You know what else can sometimes be nasty, brutish and short? Dogs. Coincidence? I think not. (Although by that logic my dog probably would've said life was hyperactive, horny and incontinent. Sheesh... terriers.)

Unknown said...

vsk said ...

Mr. Ms. Anonymous Anon at 2:49pm,

Not bragging really, just schadenfreuding on myself and self depreciating all over the place that I really should have had water and a salad for lunch (what I do most days during the week although you'd never suspect it) and instead opted for the most comfy of comfort foods.

And I cain't handle my likka anyway.

vsk

dop said...

VSK-

If I flatted at 2nd & 14th, I'd head in to Dan Lynch's and have a beer.

DB said...

NYT says tomorrow is the day Marty McFly comes to 2015.
Cubs Win!

Anonymous said...

That was one of least interesting car vs. bike videos I've seen.

leroy said...

Mr. vsk -- If I flatted at 2nd & 14th, I'd head to Veniero's on 11th & 1st and have a cappuccino and cannoli.

Mr. Figners -- if experience has taught me anything, it's that you can't negotiate with terriers.

Anonymous said...

”With no books to place on their heads how could they practice?”

Dating back to at least 3200 BCE, if people were so inclined they could have practiced with
sun dried clay tablets.
Starting in the 5th or maybe 6th centuries BCE they could have used
scrolls.

BamaPhred said...

There are lots of good rides, but New York/New England Fall would be hard to beat. Reading Snob makes me want to ride up there, but then reality sets in.

dop said...

Pfft Veniero's...go across the street to DeRobertis

Bloc-Quebecois said...

TedK est un connard.

crosspalms said...

So the story so far is that most people alive today live in cities and most people dead today live in the suburbs and the country? Think I'll stick with the city...

Henry Miller said...

Only the dead live in Brooklyn

Anonymous said...

Lucas Brunelle should have stayed in Chernobyl:

https://youtu.be/GQNnfWf2CRA?t=269

P. Bateman said...

i think this chart will help lend some clarity to the evolutionary debate

http://bit.ly/1LBKX4K

actually, i wont lie, i was there last night, though its now called something else.

Henry Miller said...

Shit. I misquoted it and I didn't say that after all.

leroy said...

dop --

Sadly, can't go to DeRobertis.

Bummer.

Grump said...

The solution to the caltrops problem is to pick them up and throw them into the roadway. Better move fast, because the cops will be there in 45 seconds to give you a major beatdown.

dop said...

I'm easy. Veniero's it is. (I moved out of Stuy Town years ago. Toga was still at the corner of 14th and Avenue B)

Anonymous said...

Hey Grump, way to synergize! Take the caltrops & plop 'em in front of the cops "whose parking space" is the bike lane.

JB said...

Brunelle has the cash (or influence) to obtain a Cinelli with Dura Ace, why can't he get a GoPro? He's got an 8 lb. bike with a 7 lbs. of cameras and brackets bolted to his helment.

BikeSnobNYC said...

JB,

He's locked into Betamax.

--Wildcat Etc.

DB said...

Leroy:
Those Music School/Pastry Shop combos are hard to keep going in this economy.

JLRB said...

First - most important - does the wheaties allergy apply to beer too?

Second - Don't let the change of seasons get you down, or I will follow behind you in to the abyss of sadness

Third - I hope you dropped those euro-tourists like a bad habit

Last (I promise) - That web site VSK linked to with the ninja things is really messed up. And the comments are hilarious - the ninja things aren't as sharp as they used to be, blah blah blah

Anonymous said...

Today's discussion has proven that cycling is a primitive exercise.

It's taken millions of years of evolutionary progress for humans to walk upright, but only a century or so of bicycle design to undo all that hard work by hunching people up again.

It pains me to say this, but skateboarding represents a higher level of human achievement than cycling…

leroy said...

dop --

I moved from 11th & 2nd years ago. Still go back to Veniero's from time to time, especially if passing on commute. Haven't been to John's on 12th Street for pasta in many years. Remember it as great.

dop said...

The best fast food was a plate of pierogi' from Christina's Polish kitchen. Straight out of the steam drawer and ready to eat. First and Thirteenth.

BikeSnobNYC said...

JLRB,

I don't know. I am avoiding wheat beer, but imbibing all other beer.

--Wildcat Etc.

Spokey said...


thx crosspalms at 4:56

i've wondered whether i live in suburbia or a rural area. still farms here but i don't wake up to the cock crowing any more as they build more and more houses. but finally i now know it doesn't matter.

i am dead either way. it was the uncertainty that was killing me.

Spokey said...


snobbie

you gots to move to vodka. no gluten. no wheat. just potatoes and potatos are just chock full of potassium. very good for you.

BamaPhred said...

He does have the Homemade Potato Vodka bike, which is probably due for an appearance.

bad boy of the north said...

Theresa's on first and 6th(?)...for polish.small place.big dishes.long gone.

bad boy of the north said...

Teresa's......oh...number 99

bad boy of the north said...

and the century mark

McFly said...

I have the allergies. Mostly wood. I am currently putting down fresh hardwood in 3 bedrooms. She always gets her way. Zyrtec. Allegra. Claritin. Nothing seems to help.

geebusiness said...

Oops! I think I just fucking railed it.

P. Bateman said...

allergic to wood? that actually a thing?

here i thought i was bored watching this cubs game because of a baseball alergy because its so slow and boring, but i see that Wood is pitching, so maybe thats it.

leroy said...

Bad boy of the north - well of course Teresa's. Veselka just not the same.

McFly said...

*Wood spores.....more specifically, that float in the air and enter the lungs. The ripping up of the carpet exposing the 40 year old press board subfloor is what's giving Walgreens a banner month. It doesn't affect me out of doors.

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

P Bateman,

I thought it was a Mets' game?

bad boy of the north said...

nypd officer shot and killed after chasing suspect,suspected of stealing a bike at gunpoint.rip.

dop said...

Leshko's

bad boy of the north said...

Kiev's...also I lived around the corner from ratner's

Rin Tin Tin said...

One of you bi-sicklers shot a heroic combat dog way out yonder in Wyoming. A state of war has been declared. You short-pants sister boys have been duly warned.

babble on said...

Oh ferfucksake. Wake up. THAT particular war has been going on for almost a century now, with entitled motorists ensuring that our lives are in constant danger.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

I live and ride in a mostly rural area. Low car traffic, Beautiful scenery and open spaces. It is really nice except for one thing. Country folk seem to think it's perfectly fine to let their canine friends run loose. I've been chased countless times. Often I notice the dog coming and get on down the road. About 50% of the dogs don't make a sound as they give chase. Once I was bit by a German shepard. Been cases where I couldn't outrun the dog and had to do the old bike as shield thing. My raised voice and crazy eyes usually does the trick but I have encountered animals not very willing to back down.

Now imagine riding a low to the ground recumbent where your face is right at dog level.

So no sympathy from me for the poor pooch.

People need to control their animals. The whole thing could have been easily avoided.

Unknown said...

vsk said ...

McFly's da man puttin down some fresh hard wood in 3 rooms! Did you learn that trick from Lamar?

Post flatting my strava line looks like a drunken Citibiker's path. Change the tubes now? No I'll go to the NYPD station, fuck it's getting cold just ambling over here. Talk to a fatal femme on a Fuji and tell here to watch out for these things. Stop by the station amid blaring chants of "How do you spell terrorist / N Y P D" I said I'll come back another time, thanks. Answer the phone after taking pix and bla bla blogging.
I should have just had a drink and leased a seat on the R train there and then.

Now the inventory of tubes is great but the 32mm valve stem ones I have won't reach the outside of my 55 mm H Plus Sons... just kidding... although this boxy Bontrager rim needs really a 42mm.

So it's a stop by the precinct tonight and NYC Velo to get some tubeses.

It's gorgeous out.

vsk

Unknown said...

vsk said ...

Side bar-

I heard the NYPD Officer who got shot last night was chasing a bike thief.
I didn't read the whole thing...




vsk

BamaPhred said...

RCT, Yes, in spades. Every fucko that moves out here thinks that they have to go find the biggest dogs they can, and it's ok to let them roam and crap cow paddy sized piles in your yard. Then they are annoyed when you ride your bike and complain about Marmaduke biting you.

Unknown said...

vsk said ...

In the additional Lanterne Rouge department . . .

http://www.gizmag.com/bird-of-prey-bike/39930/

Now you need drone video for buttcrackie.

vsk

BamaPhred said...

And yeah, that heroic combat dog was was a stressed out, burnt out, psycho biting loose cannon that was on anti-psychotics. If he brought aid and comfort to his owner that's great, but the animal was trained to defend his territory, and that's exactly what he did.. I would like to know more, but it's ok for the cops to shoot your lap dog cause officer safety.. This whole scene is just fucked up.

N/A said...

Hey Sudheer, I do not like the contain of your blog. So, put that in your juice box and suck it!

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

When chased, the dog tends to stay on the right side of the bike. If I am able, I will drift and ride the shoulder of the oncoming lane, putting Fido in the middle of the oncoming lane. I haven't seen one get flatted yet, but there's hope.

McFly said...

For the record I am laying down the hardwood with no supplemental enhancements other than some idea's from Porn Hub.

BamaPhred said...

Well this thread has certainly gone to the dogs. I observed the same thing POC. Thought I was just imagining things. Congrats on laying down the hard wood, McFly. I'm doing it in the kitchen.

leroy said...

My dog only attacks on hills.

Now that I think about it, I've chased him, but he's never chased me. He's never bitten anyone, but he's a notorious wheel sucker.

Of course, call him a Cat anything and he acts insulted.

DB said...

I have a guy who lays down the hardwood for me.
After 41 years of marriage it's getting tougher to get down and do a good job.

DB said...

Hey, Leroy:
What's the verdict on Russ and Daughters'?
Ate there twice this summer and really enjoyed it.
Did the obligatory trip to Katz', meh.

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