Thursday, June 4, 2015

I Believe That Children Are Our Future. The Rest Is Their Problem.

So I read where in the comment section of this blog yesterday how some big running coach guy was drug-doping his competitive joggers:


Salazar is a US athletics legend, who won the New York marathon three years in a row and ran himself unconscious in winning the Boston marathon in 1982.

He is now one of the world's most successful coaches. The head coach at the prestigious Nike running camp based in Portland, Oregon, Salazar has worked with Farah since 2011 and has coached his training partner Rupp for 14 years.

Why is this surprising?  Isn't it just assumed that any athlete involved with Nike is also involved in doping?  All the "swoosh" on their uniforms mean is that they haven't been caught yet:


("Floyd, what's the temperature on the 'wine fridge?'  I don't want those bags of 'Merlot' to go bad.")

Really, it's nothing more than a stylized asterisk pending the results of the doping control:


(The universal symbol for "awaiting return of the 'B' sample.")

I love it when sports collapses on itself.

In other news, remember how last year Woody Allen designed a bike that was going to revolutionize bikes?


Well, obviously he succeeded, which is why you're riding one of his bikes now.

Aren't you?

Anyway, Woody is clearly applying his one-film-a-year approach to bicycles, because now he's back with a children's bike:


And please keep your comments about Woody Allen and children to yourself.

(How psyched is Woody that everyone's moved on to Bill Cosby?)

Here's the story:


"With my son turning two, I was motivated to re-think the children's bicycle."

Of course you were.

If you're not a parent, let me tell you how it works: modern homo Sapiens have been around for 200,000 years, which means humans have been parenting for at least that long.  Despite this, when people become new parents they think they're suddenly going to turn the whole goddamn operation around, like some young hotshot CEO at a stodgy old company.  This is clearly what's going in with Woody, but rest assured it will soon be beaten out of him, because that's what children do.

Still, you can't blame the guy for trying.  I used to try too, until I learned better.

In this case though Woody is doubly audacious, because he's entering a crowded marketplace.  After all, when it comes to kids' bikes, parents have lots of options--everything from the toy section at the local big box retailer to high-end kid-specific bike companies like this:


Furthermore, in between, most of the bigger bike companies offer a line of children's bikes, and you can purchase these along with a wide array of accessories (bells, lights, squeaky things, Hamlets) from the competent professionals (or at least intermittently attentive shop rats) at your LBS.

Still, this guy's got a two year-old, which means he hasn't yet had the fight beaten out of him, so by golly he's going to waste a bunch of time and energy he'll be wishing in a couple of years that he had held onto by designing something that already exists.

So he walks around the neighborhood and identifies a bunch of stuff that's wrong with kids' bikes.  For example, the training wheels are a pain in the ass:


Though he fails to note that this is a gravel-specific bicycle which is presumably fitted with gravel-specific training wheels for the Dirty Kanza .200:


He also notices that a lot of kids' bikes are rusty:


Though I'm pretty sure that's just garbage--which would also explain the flat:


"Trying to teach your kid when their tires haven't been fully inflated is harder for them and for you."

Oh, Woody, you have much to learn.  For one thing, inflating a 12" wheel is not exactly difficult--it takes like half a pump stroke, and you could probably do it orally in a pinch.  More importantly though, pneumatic tires are an incredibly powerful weapon in your parental arsenal, because when you don't feel like chasing the goddamn kid around all you have to do is surreptitiously drop the PSI, thus slowing the little brat down.  Furthermore, inflatable tires allow you to modulate this effect, and you can choose everything from "just a bit" to "sorry kid, flat tire, looks like Daddy's staying on the couch."  [Cracks beer, falls asleep.]

For the same reason, Woody is foolish to design a bike that doesn't require tools:


See, when your parenting energy is high you want an opportunity to show your kids how to use them and delude them into thinking you're competent, and when it's low you want an excuse to sit on your ass:


("For the last goddamn time we can't fix your bike without a wrench!  Now go watch TV!")

Anyway, here's the result of all this data-gathering.  First, the bike has a belt drive:


"My kids want to touch every part of the bike, which means greasy hands.  With our belt, dirty hands and clothes aren't an issue for them, or for the parents carrying the bike."

What!?!  Chain drives build character!  If you haven't wrestled with a stuck pant leg or almost lost a digit at some point during childhood then you'll never mature into a competent cyclist.

Also, the bike is aluminum for weight savings:


I'm not sure this is particularly innovative.  After all, my kid's bike from a large company that likes to sue people is also aluminum.  Then again, somehow it still manages to weigh a bazillion pounds, so I wonder if this one is any lighter--though chances are it's pretty much the same frame.

Then of course it has the solid flat-free tires:


Not only is Woody going to be kicking himself for these for the reasons I mentioned, but they also don't allow you to adjust the kid's pressure for gravel riding, thus nixing his or her chances in the local cyclocross series or the Dirty Kanzaa .200:



And don't forget the patent-pending tool-free training wheels:


My kid's bike from a large company that likes to sue people came with training wheels just like this, which means Woody's on a collision course with Mike Sinyard.


("I own the concept of bikes and childhood."--Mike Sinyard)

Lastly, here's a little slice of Brooklyn life:


Center for High-Energy Metaphysics (and a bike) on the L - w4m - 21 (Brooklyn bound L train)
age : 21

Here's a long shot but why the hell not.

First of all, great purple sweater. It said "Center for High-Energy Metaphysics" and you had a bike in a crowded BK bound L at around 11:00pm, Wednesday June 3. I got on at 3rd Ave, got off at Lorimer. We made eye contact more than once but alas, I never actually say anything to anyone on the train...you were really cute though and I wanna know what the hell high-energy metaphysics is. 

If you ever find this, include in the reply what colour my beanie was :)

That's clearly a trick question: it was rainbow-colored with a propeller on it.

What do I win?

88 comments:

Spokey said...

yeller !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Unknown said...

21. Leftists may claim that their activism is motivated by compassion or by moral principles, and moral principle does play a role for the leftist of the oversocialized type. But compassion and moral principle cannot be the main motives for leftist activism. Hostility is too prominent a component of leftist behavior; so is the drive for power. Moreover, much leftist behavior is not rationally calculated to be of benefit to the people whom the leftists claim to be trying to help. For example, if one believes that affirmative action is good for black people, does it make sense to demand affirmative action in hostile or dogmatic terms? Obviously it would be more productive to take a diplomatic and conciliatory approach that would make at least verbal and symbolic concessions to white people who think that affirmative action discriminates against them. But leftist activists do not take such an approach because it would not satisfy their emotional needs. Helping black people is not their real goal. Instead, race problems serve as an excuse for them to express their own hostility and frustrated need for power. In doing so they actually harm black people, because the activists’ hostile attitude toward the white majority tends to intensify race hatred.

Anonymous said...

Ted doesn't count; podio

raphasucks said...

Podium at a shitty Cat 5 CX race. 5th Step.

That said: I think Bill Cosby is psyched everyone moved on to the Duggars.

Ted Cruz out.

raphasucks said...

Wait, if Ted doesn't count I actually took the bronze!

Anonymous said...

Should Ted K. be banned from Blogger Chat:

1. yes

2. no

dop said...

A kiss on the glans, may be quite continental...


a robot doesn't have a glans

wishiwasmerckx said...

Top ten.

Gonçalo said...

sim senhor sim senhor

samh said...

Training wheels? What is this the 20th century?

JB said...

DUMB BYKS

McFly said...

This is clearly what's going in with Woody, but rest assured it will soon be beaten out of him,

Again with the boners?

The commentariat said...

I am guessing that the great BabbleOn has done it orally in a pinch a few times in her life!

Anonymous said...

Good one Snob.
WIWM: package on its way to you via the UPS people. Look for it Wednesday. Clear large space in your office or basement.
Leroy: I read that women are being groped in Williamsburg and wondered if your Dog has been wandering around Love Lane unaccompanied.

Anonymous said...

vsk said ...

Toppus Twentyus


vsk

dop said...

Losing digits to a chain? Fond childhood memory: My father was teaching my older brothers how to fix a flat. After the part with squeezing the tube under water in the sink & watching for bubbles I got bored. (I could hear him yell fuck while chain smoking anytime) With the bike upside down & reassembled, my father triumphantly spun the crank. My four year old self wondered what would happen if I stuck my finger between rear sprocket & chain: It hurt a bit, my father yelled fuck, my mother yelled, we went to the ER (Ellis Hospital, Schenectady NY) Nothing wrong with the digit. I got yelled at for causing so much trouble & I think a tetanus shot. (that chain looked rusty). Would you steal memories like that for a shitty belt drive?

Buffalo Bill said...

Well, with seventeen (17) kids, I imagine any fight you might have had would be thoroughly beaten out of you. But one (1) single two (2) year old? How bad could it be?


Or is it eighteen (18) now? I have trouble keeping it straight.

Anonymous said...

vsk said ...

Every now and then I see a nice kid-specific bike come to auction on eBay worldwide.

Many of them seem really well designed with decent components. You just have to deal with the uncommon-in-the-US tyre sizes. No 700 or 650, you go to 600A or
400A.

Still, might be cool for some kiddies.

vsk

PotbellyJoe said...

2.

As for my kiddles, I looked at finding a better way to do a kids bike. It was Craigslist. The bikes are built of materials stronger than most adult bikes and yet the kids outgrow them in a matter of two years. Buy one for less than 50% of the original cost and then don't worry about how well the kid rides, or how to make it easier on yourself. Just ride on the cheap until the kid enjoys it and then get him on premium stuff. Or if he doesn't enjoy it, the issue resolves itself.

I'll do the same thing when he starts driving. Find a old-lady-blue Oldsmobile with a 3.8L V6 and let my kids figure out if they like driving, or if they are any good at it. They can then upgrade to more premium stuff if they want to make that a priority.

Went out for a ride last night and crushed my time on a loop I ride frequently. So that was nice.

I lump the kickstarter parents in the same category as craft-beer brewers. At some point they tried a competing product and with no previous experience said to themselves, "I can do this better than them." So they're either arrogant, or liars. Maybe both. Proceed with caution.

P. Bateman said...

dang it i'm late. has anyone made mention of "you can do it orally" yet?

i bet YOU can SNOB, i bet you can....but you probably do it best with the written word.

Freddy Murcks said...

Does anybody make a hamle(n)t version of a propeller beanie?

leroy said...

Beanie podium.

My dog observed that "High Energy Metaphysics" is reading John Donne while imbibing Red Bull.

He says everybody knows that.

But of course, I didn't get it.

leroy said...

DB--

My dog assures me he is much too polite for such churlish behavior.

And anyway, he doesn't have opposable thumbs.

JLRB said...

Center for High Energy Meta-Physics?... Why the funny name? ...Think about the initials.

Freddy Murcks said...

Reading about the allegations of systematic doping of the Nike Oregon Project athletes didn't surprise me, but it depressed me nonetheless. The NYT ran a nice profile a while back of a young runner, Mary Cain, who has decided to forgo running as an NCAA amateur to join the Nike project. The article made it seem like a sensible decision and Mary Cain seems like a good person. It saddens me to think of her having to make the choice to dope or not to dope when her trusted coach seems to be very much in the "dope" camp.


http://www.nytimes.com/2015/03/08/magazine/mary-cain-is-growing-up-fast.html?_r=0

JLRB said...

Potbelly Joe - In other words, all kids bikes are maintenance free ...

PotbellyJoe said...

@JLRB,

Exactly. If they start to wear down, sell them on craigslist and buy one in better shape. You'll be out $15 on the xchange depending on your negotiating skills. Far cheaper than getting anything repaired.

Anonymous said...

BOY-YOY-YOY-YOY-YOING!!!

Top said...

Helmet propeller; I want to see that out on the road someday. Heh, heh. I can imagine it generating energy for a light, Rube Golberg style.

Spokey said...

of course i read that as

JLRB said...

Potbelly Joe - In other words, all kids are maintenance free ...

PotbellyJoe said...

@JLRB,

Exactly. If they start to wear down, sell them on craigslist and buy one in better shape

JB said...

What happens when the holes in those flat-free tires fill with mud, etc. and then it dries? That'd be like running way too many PSIs and adding a pound of rotating weight. Unacceptable for my little Jebediah.

Freddy Murcks said...

Alas, poor Yorick! He wore a propeller beanie. He'd hath lived had he been wearing a hamlet when he crashed his velocipede.

grog said...

While waiting for the naked ride to resume, Recumbabe saw my flat tire, and asked whether I'd like her to blow it up, and that she could do it orally in a pinch. She seemed to be over-anxious to me and I was disgusted.

dop said...

To hell with the Dudley cooperatives...Winthrop house all the way

P. Bateman said...

if you go digging on the high energy meat-a-physics site, you'll find this: http://www.hcs.harvard.edu/~dudcoop/photos/2010/Thumbnails/22.jpg

pretty much sums up harvard-nites. or harvard-trans-vest-knights.

T. McVeigh said...

... But leftist activists do not take such an approach because it would not satisfy their emotional needs. Helping black people is not their real goal. Instead, race problems serve as an excuse for them to express their own hostility and frustrated need for power. In doing so they actually harm black people, because the activists’ hostile attitude toward the white majority tends to intensify race hatred.

Good stuff, Ted. Looking forward to paragraph 22. Really wish you could phone:(

P. Bateman said...

oh wait. that actually is a gal. nevermind.

Unknown said...

I do wish that Snob had taken the opportunity to rant against training wheels. The current accepted way to teach kids and adults to ride bikes is to give them a bike without pedals. They push with their feet a-la-dandy-horse until they get the hang of the balance, THEN you put the pedals back on. It makes everything way easier because the hard part is the balance, and they get to learn & focus on that first.

crosspalms said...

Snob, thought you'd be interested in this guy's book, if you don't already know about it. I won't be able to make his talk, but I might swing by the bookstore this weekend.

tc said...

I don't have any children, because I think 7 billion people is probably enough and anymore and the earth may possibly fall out of the sky and the last thing the world needs is a mini-me (you don't know me but take my word for it). However, if I did have a kid I would consider this bike. Seems nifty, except the rubber tires.

Also, his priority low maintenance bike seems to be selling. Not my thing personally, but a good idea.

McFly said...

I built some training wheels for the boys Honda XR50 that mounted under the pegs when he was 3. He learnt to ride a motorcycle without flailing his feet/legs all about and still stays smooth to this day on a Yamaha YZ125.

BamaFred I am headed your way at 3:00 today CST. Going to the Foley AL and then on to Dauphin Island for a romantical wedding of my bro Saturday. I bet there will not be a dry Vaglia Rosa in the house.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Jean-Francois,

I taught my kid using both a balance bike and a regular bike with training wheels. He used whichever based on mood. One taught balance, the other helped him focus on learning to pedal. He was riding with no training wheels shortly after his 3rd birthday so it seemed to work fine.

--Wildcat Etc.

babble on said...

Yep... kids love having choices.

And yep. 'Lady Baba' has a certain fondness for all things oral, though never once have I blown a tire.

David Pearce said...

Dear WCRM,

Speaking of "Halmets" and "Hamlets" and Helme(n)ts, here's another thing that's defective.

Here in D.C. we just lived through our hottest May on record. Washington weather never fails to disappoint -- if there are two nice spring days in a row, it's remarkable. Usually we go right from chilly to nice, to freaking 90℉ and 90% humidity. This past Monday, June 1 was one of the latter -- it was miserable, one of those days where you say, man, I lived through it. What I resent is that we KNOW that D.C. summer weather is miserable, but can't they save it for July, August, September, when we expect to be miserable, and let us have some nice early days‽

Of course, now it hasn't cracked 60℉ & cloudy / rainy for three days in a row, but nominally, it's spring. And as it is spring, my thoughts turned to outdoor pursuits, like grilling. I just got through one of the weirdest situations I ever had with a liquid propane tank. I got this AmeriGas exchange tank at Home Depot. I had found this very nice grill thrown out on the street near my house, a Weber Genesis Gold, with a side burner (turns out, it's a Weber Genesis Gold "C", made in 2004). It has the modern tank attachment, with the large black hand-nut, which I had never used before.

So I attach my exchange tank, and I find that the open-close knob on the tank is jammed -- it won't open. Not having used the hand-nut connection before, I thought, hmm, I guess this is some kind of new system which bypasses the tank cut-off valve. My erroneous conclusion was reinforced when, lo & behold, when I turned on the grill burners, there was gas, and I lit the burners, and they worked like normal.

I was getting gas out of the tank, even when the tank valve was "nominally" closed! What the heck‽‽‽ And to make matters worse, when I began to loosen the hand-nut to remove the tank, there was a great hiss and smell of gas leaking out, freaking the hell out of me, I thought it might not stop when the tank was removed, so I tightened the nut back up and the gas leak stopped.

I had a tank, without a functioning cutoff, that put out gas without being opened, and I couldn't remove it!

[Insert here 3+ hours on the phone, talking the situation over with friends, with Weber Grills, with AmeriGas]

The upshot, don't try and remove the tank, burn off the gas with the grill, then remove the tank. I think one should attend to the grill when it's running, but it's hard to stay there if it takes possibly 20 hours to burn the gas off. I positioned the grill in the yard where I hoped it wouldn't melt any overhead wires or set any tree branches on fire, opened the top, lit it up, hoped the breeze would not blow out either the three grill burners or the side burner.

And there it sat, burning full-tilt-boogy for 12 hours, with me checking it periodically. It worked fine. Finally, at 2:00 a.m., I found the grill cool and the flames out, and my house not burned down it the process. I was able to remove the tank without blowing anything up. The AmeriGas guy said they would bring me an exchange tank, but somehow I agreed to take it back from whence it came, and get the exchange myself. The said they'll "red-tag it", and AmeriGas would eventually fix it or trash it. I imagined one of those nice red tags, with the wire twist-tie ends, that looks nice 'n' official, you know?, like, "We put safety first!".

This is what I got.

In case the link doesn't work, the message the barely literate clerk taped on reads: "DEFECTEV". That's not the only thing that's got a problem!

And my new exchange tank works just like normal, thanks. All I lost was three days out of my life, dealing with it. Go figure!

Unknown said...

"Really wish you could phone"

Can you currently phone, or is the afterlife limited to internet and ouija boards?

Allseeing said...

DP - Winner for completely off topic rants - sorry Ted K - you will need to work harder to outdo the master.

Hee Haw the Barista's mom said...

The best kids bike is a skinny tire BMX racing bike ... the aluminum kind, not the skatepark steel framed kind.

That is all.

David Pearce said...

Allseeing,

Yeah, I know, and I won't do it often. I hope, at least, the punchline was worth the time reading through it. At least it dealt with things mechanical.

Anonymous said...

David Pearce,
re:"Washington weather never fails to disappoint -- if there are two nice spring days in a row, it's remarkable." True dat. It's like Mom Nature just can't hit the sweet spot on the tuning knob here in the mid-Atlantic meteorological hell-hole. It is either the mid-summer 90 degree schfitz or nasty, rainy, and windy...like it has been for the last 3 days. Oh well...at least maybe this mini-monsoon will wash away the blankets of snot-clogging pollen.

KnĂ¼t Fredriksson said...

Isn't the kid going to stick their finger in one of those tire holes? Seems like the same kind of enticement and risk as a moving chain...
My youngest started on a balance bike and was rocking the local pump track Fred Flintstone style in short order. Her fist time at the track with a peddle bike and she forgot how to stop and nearly rammed into a fence. Having equal exposure to both kinds of kids bikes seems like the best option. Especially if you get your kids, er bikes, on craigslist.

David Pearce said...

Speaking of off topic, although it does have to do with transportation, Save the Date, June 7, Sunday Afternoon at Yorktown, Virginia. The Hermione is coming! L'Hermione arrive! Brush up on your french, bring your cameras. Be "Terre" or be square!

P.S. WCRM, hope you're planning something when She arrives in NYC July 1-4.

David Pearce said...

Stupid link syntax! Be "Terre or Be Square!"

CommieCanuck said...

Jeez. Woody got it all wrong. My kids bikes never got a flat, once, they never touched the chain (icky), and they never complained about the weight as long as it was below the UCI minimum.
Used Chinese kid's bikes rule. If you paid more than $20, you paid too much. These "L'il Douchebag" bikes are ridiculous for kids, who surprisingly don't give a fuck about a lot of things we slowly teach then to obsessively give a fuck about.

CHEP BIKE

JB said...

So the Hermoine thing is like the tweed ride of boating?

Balance bike: they learn to balance and turn but not pedal and use the brake.
Training wheels: they learn to pedal and brake, but not balance and turn.
Fvck it, I'm leasing my kid a battery-powered Escalade to run over your kid on the balance bike.

Anonymous said...

Woody Wiener Kid's Bike, ride it at World Bike Nude Day

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

@David Pearce

Keep a bottle of that "Liquid Smoke" in your fridge and add to your marinades. Adds a little smokey flavor to your LP grilled. Comes in a bunch of woody flavors too.

JLRB said...

JB - Perfect solution

OR you could be cruel and teach your kid to ride the backwards bike from Mr. smarter every day (which has been posted a few times, blah blah blah)

JLRB said...

Came across this little gem from the past when looking for something else: “Are you kidding? Look at me! I have no money! How could I have sold out?”

David Pearce said...

@recumbent conspiracy theorist, thank you! I know my grill is not classic charcoal, but as I say, one, I found it, and two, it is more convenient to turn it on and be ready to grill in 5 minutes. But have no fear, I will getting into all the usual suspects, the wood chips soaked in water, liquid smoke, etc. Can't wait to get it on!

@JB, well, I guess that you could call it "the tweed ride of boating", but what really turns me on about it, is that they had to learn how to build a tall ship all over again! I think that's cool! Mixing new technology (radios, speed meters, GPS) with old technology having to be learned-by-doing, making rope, finding the right trees with the right branches to make the ribs, or trunks to make the masts.

And I like France, I like the French, I like French, I love history, and its coming to my town, and I've got some cool cameras and what can I say, I'm just am a fan. I think better than calling the voyage, "the tweed ride of boating", it is really more like riding the Paris-Brest-Paris Randonée on classic machines from the 1920s to the 1940s.

caPt scrAnus said...

please be quiet in there

i'm studying for tomorrow's quiz

never_tested_positive said...

Flashback to Thom Wiesel, Lance's boss, the guy who owns the U.S. cycling federation, also owns and operates the USPS team in which 'mericuh's favorite dopers rode. They got some extra help from the UCI. The federations that were supposed to enforce anti-doping were totally in on the doping.

It's 2015 and the machines haven't risen, yet.... USA track and field's super-duper sponsor who just signed a decade-long contract is Nike, who also operate NOP... The federations that are supposed to enforce anti-doping are probably in on the doping.

It is "never tested positive" all over again.

What. A. Joke.

Anonymous said...

In other news, a Michigan judge actually sentenced a motorist to prison for killing a cyclist — and took away the motorist’s cell phone: http://www.cnet.com/news/judge-bans-woman-from-using-cell-phone-after-fatal-crash/

JB said...

DP, just joking about he old-skool boat. It looks cool.

David Pearce said...

JB, Indeed. No offense taken, none given, I trust.

We're all friends here! Well, most of us.... :-)

David Pearce said...

JB, check out their daily blog posts!

For a society that was formed almost before the internet was The Internet, and of course there was no Facebook, I think they are handling their social media really well! The blogging is good, a little history, a little science, a little talk about life at sea.

They are on it!

Time to Vote said...

Babble votes in favor of boners, Road Queen votes in favor of boners, how will Frilly Chick vote?

Freddy Murcks said...

never_tested_positive - when I was reading the depressing coverage of the all too likely systematic doping program with in the Nike Oregon Project, I did note that they said that Galen Rupp was the most tested athlete in the country last year and that he has never tested positive. It was straight out of the motherfucking Lance Armstrong/USPS playbook. In terms of handling the media, I am sure that those dirty fuckers at the NOP learned a lot from Lancy Pants.

Anonymous said...

ummm of course Salazar was feeding the kids dope: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/10/28/lance-armstrong-talks-marathons/?_r=0

Jobz Boner said...

Boners are great. They just shouldn't be allowed to go to waste. A man only has so many of those things in his lifetime. Step up, ladies.

West Coasterbrake said...

My first bike was one that was bought with the idea of my parents that I would eventually 'grow into' it. To go for a ride I had to walk it down the street to a neighbour's house, climb up onto a cement footing for one of their carport support posts, and launch. Getting off it was a bit more tricky but usually just involved the front lawn which would cushion any blows incurred during the dismount.
Ps. Also, helmets were things to be worn only by astronauts and soldiers.

alberto is my friend said...

and more ALberto/Lance stuff...not that alberto
http://triathlon.competitor.com/2011/03/news/lance-armstrong-turns-to-legendary-running-coach-for-ironman-advice_24430

Anonymous said...

Ted K is boring.

Comment deleted said...

Hey, did Jack Aubrey ever rake the Hermione fore and aft?

babble on said...

Winecanine -Odd punishment, but it's good to see that she was charged, found guilty, and sentenced. Um, and are you related to Leroy's dog, by any chance? Only, it sounds like you have a few things in common, is all. He loves a fine vintage.

Anonymous said...

Hey snob! Have you put in your order for the $5000 Vanilla cycles ultimate urban bomber bike yet? Because, you know, everyone needs a single speed coaster break bike with $800 custom welded integrated stemdlebar.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 8:37pm,

I am not acknowledging the existence of that bike-shaped publicity stunt.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Sac de Bleu said...

Doping, in running!!! Next thing you know they'll catch a cyclist (world collectively gasped).

BamaPhred said...

DP, that was an epic off topic rant. I am humbled.

Sorry I missed you McFly. You know I would have stood on the side of I65 and flashed you as you went by. Just kidding, there is like no way I would do something like that.

I liked the doping better in the old days, like when the East German ladies swim team looked like the Steelers linebackers.

Select all foods, hhhmmmmnnnn, one of the foods looks like a bucket of worms.

Anonymous said...

Lantern rouge...

Mike Syn said...

"I own the concept of bikes and childhood."

and I own your dreams, too.

Pay up.

JLRB said...

DP - Spot on with the DC weather oddities - another rainy ride this morning. Steamy storms return next week, with little in between, as usual.

dop said...

smegma

FIFA a Little Bag of Cash will Do Ya said...

SdB 912 "Doping, in running!!! Next thing you know they'll catch a cyclist (world collectively gasped)."

Or a FIFA executive taking a bribe (world collectively yawns, there are some things the world simply expects to happen).

Anonymous said...

vsk said ...

At the little get together for the Brooklyn Velodrome Vintage Wheelmen at John's Pizzeria on Bleeker, one of the guys said, "Hey I saw your picture on Bike Snob's blog, how was the ride?".

I have arrived.

vsk

Unknown said...

Ok. So hopefully you never have to inflate a 12 inch wheel when the inner tube has been mistakenly installed such that the valve tube is at a 45 degree angle. Sure I could take the silly thing apart and put it together right, But then I crack a beer and fall asleep every time it becomes an issue.

Also you say that drivers are not punished for their crimes.

http://www.foxnews.com/leisure/2015/06/05/no-cellphone-for-2-years-for-driver-in-fatal-bike-crash/

Thanks,
Jason

chris ganser said...

Really funny article. I love the way it rambles along. Actually I enjoyed most of your posts.

ChildCareInsight said...

looking at the environment, we must encourage our children to take up bikes.

hou said...

My father was teaching my older brothers how to fix a flat.
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