Friday, August 28, 2009

BSNYC Summer Recess Announcement (and Friday Fun Quiz!)

Firstly, I'd like to take this opportunity to announce that today marks the official start of my "Summer Recess." This is the period during which I sew the pant legs back onto all my cutoff shorts, take my fall chicken suit out of cold storage (if I don't store it properly it will molt), and change the grips and tape on the "touch points" of my various bicycles to "colourways" that are more seasonally appropriate. As you can imagine, this process is quite labor intensive, so that means I will be taking a break from this blog, but rest assured that I will return on Tuesday, September 8th with regular updates. You can also rest assured that my helper monkey Vito and I will take the opporunity to catch up on other matters as well, such as the dissemination of the various "prizeways" for the Fat Cyclist Knuckle Tattoo Tribute Competition, the perusal of emails, and of course the much-needed shampooing and deodorizing of my 70s-themed bicycle work area. (Suede bean bags and shag carpet may look great, but they also tend to retain both grease and odors--especially when you employ a helper monkey.)

Secondly, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right you'll see confirmation, and if you're wrong you'll be seduced by Murray.

Thanks very much for reading, emailing, commenting and making the "process" of writing this blog so enjoyable, be sure to wring the last few drops of sweaty enjoyment from the remainder of the summer, enjoy the Labor Day weekend (assuming your countryway observes it), and ride safely, smartly, and flambulliently.

--BSNYC/RTMS









1) Gary Klein, once synonymous with fat aluminum tubing and dessert-like "colourways," is now synonymous with:

--Stethescopes
--Periscopes
--Telescopes
--The Scopes Monkey Trial







2) "Fuss Vom Gas" means:

--"Foot on the Gas"
--"Foot off the Gas"
--"The Gas Foot"
--"Fussy When Gassy"







3) According to Seth Stevenson of Slate, Dutch city bikes are:

--"Primly recitilinear"
--"Prudely rectal"
--"Rectangularly prim"
--"Practically rectangular"




4) "Y Water" is the first beverage that you consume anally.

--True
--False







5) Who makes this steel "club racer," complete with gently sloping top tube and bars slightly lower than the saddle?


--Rivendell
--Velo Orange
--Bridgestone
--Cervélo






6) Whose theme saddle is this?

--Alberto Contador's
--Alexandre Vinokourov's
--Chris Horner's
--Danilo DiLuca's






(Unzipped by a pothole.)

7) According to Zipp's lead engineer Josh Poertner, why did both of Magnus Backstedt's wheels fail in the 2008 Paris-Roubaix?

--He is too big
--Carbon rims are a poor choice for a Spring Classic
--He chose poor lines on the cobbled sections
--He ran 24mm tires instead of 27mm tires on race day






8) Which bicycle company is "dropping" this fixed-gear freestyler?

--Giant
--Felt
--Trek
--Specialized





(Model has been clothed and sepiaed for your convenience.)

9) Tough times for the men's magazines? The above image, complete with crappy old department store mountain bike, is this month's "Playboy" centerfold.

--False



***Special Discman-Themed Bonus Question***



Two Years Ago, Punk on a Bike - w4m - 23 (TriBeCa)
Date: 2009-08-28, 2:33AM EDT

Reply To This Post


2 years ago I was walking my dog on Beach Street near Hudson, wearing a flowered dress and listening to ____________________________ on my discman! You biked by, black jeans, gangly, no helmet, turned around to look at me. Smiled cheekily. It may have been directed at the person behind me but I never forgot. I had just cut my hair. I love you?


What was she listening to?

--Iggy and the Stooges
--Creedence Clearwater Revivial
--Edie Brickell and the New Bohemians
--The audiobook of David Lee Roth's "Crazy From the Heat"


243 comments:

1 – 200 of 243   Newer›   Newest»
Anonymous said...

bd1

Slone said...

Podium for Velobrew?

Anonymous said...

yeah

black dickerson said...

bd2

Anonymous said...

Top 5!

bikesgonewild said...

...huh ???...

ringcycles said...

Top 10! Propelled by Y Water!! just watch out for the turbo

Anonymous said...

Top Ten?

Anonymous said...

...dias suomynonA

rezado said...

This is actually the first beverage to be consumed rectilinearly
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/01/14/darwin_awards_2007/

rezado said...

Man I love friday.

Asterisk said...

QUIZ WHIZ

Astroluc (Find me on Tumblr and Instagram @Astroluc) said...

say it aint so!

Anonymous said...

Lucky 14

Eric Lowe said...

Have fun curating your vacation

Anonymous said...

like....18th?

JoeyDurango said...

Sir Snob, I am hearing rumors that you may travel to our fair state to take part in Ye Olde Single-Speede World Championships 2009, in Durango, Colorado. I am also hearing rumors that your identity will remain secret. That's well and good and all - I don't need to know your name. But if the first rumor is true, welcome, Wordsmith, to our beautiful land of mountains and rednecks with trucks and guns. Oh yeah, and prepare to get your ass kicked! (I am. Preparing, that is.)

Chris said...

have a nice vacation, snob

Disgruntl Ed. said...

Just what are you trying to emply about Vito?

Disgruntl Ed. said...

Also, any colourway looks good when it has u in it. Thanks, and happy vacation.

Surly Bastard said...

Have a great vacation snobby. I suspect some early season 'cross action is afoot.

The Magnus wheel cracker questions and linked Zipp article was particulary funny. I remember reading a Paris Roubaix Zipp carbon wheel/team test a few years ago. After a whole lot of technical blah-blah-blah Cancellara turned to the Zipp engineers and told them: "If you ride anything but a an 32 spoke low profile alloy wheel on this shit you're a complete idiot." And this was before they managed to crack two or three sets of carbon hoops on just a few hundred yards of cobbles.

sufferist said...

Missed three on the test, Credence, really????

urchin said...

Hm...not much of a score. Let me be the first to say I wasn't holding out much hope for the Creedence.

Enjoy a well-earned snobbatical, snob. We'll have to surf the archives for a fix for a while.

Urchin/NPJLRABS

MINGUStheMECHANIC said...

When are we going to get some damn prizes for these damn quizzes.

Have Fun at the SSWC, shout out to all the stompaz for NYC and represent.

Me said...

I'm hungry

Mad Jack McMad said...

*takes family, moves back to Germany*

Anonymous said...

Dear Fellow Bike Snob Bloggers:

I locked (with a U-Lock and cable) my Red and White Schwinn Frontier bike on a fence in front of 226 East 32nd Street on Tuesday night at approximately 9:30 pm. On Wednesday at 9:30 pm, I checked on the bike and it was still there. I went to ride the bike a few hours later -- approximately 2:00 am and the bike was gone. If anyone sees it let me know. I recently bought the bike new - less than a month ago - so I have proof of purchase and the serial number. I called the owner of the building but he claims he is wealthy and did not cut it. The super in the building next door claims that he hates bikes on his fence and has cut bikes -- even though there is no sign. The owner claims it could have been construction workers on the block. Thanks for your help.

TheTye said...

Y water? Why indeed....

bikesgonewild said...

...so bsnyc/rtms...does "summer recess announcement" imply that yer intending to "school" someone between now n' labor day ???...

...inquiring minds are pondering...

**************************************************

...& anon 2:10pm...

...GOOD LUCK...

...THAT SUXX...

...n' that's for real...

Unknown said...

Be careful. Disseminating in public will get you arrested (unless you're a bum).

Anonymous said...

Where can I get me one of them APPROVED stickers with RTMS all up on it?

grog said...

, so instead of a chicken suit, you are seasonally adjusted into a turkey suit? Oh, how fowl!

FUNK WHIZ

Anonymous said...

Rollin'!

Salty Seattle said...

Surly-

Minus 5 yards for using the word 'Hoops' in an illegal formation.

hillbilly said...

Damn, tripped up by CCR. Have a great vacation! Hey, where the hell is MikeWeb?

hillbilly said...

Damn, tripped up by CCR. Have a great vacation! Hey, where the hell is MikeWeb?

Suzee said...

Let's hope that your fall prep. doesn't detract too much from your primary purpose.
Also...
70's themed flooring company cousin says...'shag v. carpet tiles + Vito = no brainer'
May your laterality remain compliant and your verticulosis as stiff as ever. Thank you.

Salty Seattle said...

..mm..ph.


..


.

..

..I'm not ..really sure .. of what just happened..

...

I remember some music.. Kinda funky-like..

..and this bike was there.

was it a bike? ..I can't rem..

OH MY GOD!

..no? ..was it?

No! it couldn't be. Let me retrace my steps. There was some dining. And there was coffee..

..and then.. Gosh, what was it?..

..umm..

let's see.. there was music, and.. It was a bike! No? .. not a real bike. Kind of one of those weird, twisted things that sometimes you see in..

THERE WAS THIS PINK PROTRUSION THING (so disproportionately disappointing, as I recall.)..

OH MY GOD!! I'VE BEEN EYE-RAPED BY A BMX!

bikramyoganj said...

Have a great rest from the blog and I will miss you!

Anonymous said...

People still used Discman in 2007?

omowo said...

That sucks.

Anonymous said...

May all of your bottom brackets be beefy, y water in your children, and iggy be on your discman.

bikesgonewild said...

...gee...i guess w/ bsnyc/rtms out a' the picture (literally) for the next week n' a half, this site is gonna become like one a those "end of summer" schmaltzy romance songs...

CommieCanuck said...

What's a "Discman"? Does it use wax cylinders?

Holy Glenn-Close-Fatal-Attraction Batman, you ride by some hippie chick who gets her hair cut every two years and smile during the Bush Administration, and she obsesses and declares her undying love for you two years later? Proud Mary, please keep on rollin'.

Some one should set her up with Joachim Phoenix.

LLOO HELL

Slappy said...

You'll be missed, don't know what I will look forward too when you're on vacation.

I want that Riv Roadeo frame. Got to ride it last Friday. It was pretty nice.

CommieCanuck said...

Anon 2:10..it would be easier to let you know if anyone sees it if you let people know who you are, ...you know?

Someone could be at 226 East 32nd right now with your bike asking people if they know 'anonymous'.

sufferist said...

BGW: Please lead us in a chorus of "Summer Love" from the Great American Musical "Grease!"

Critical Ass said...

Modifying lugs to cut grams? Isn't that what crabon is for? What kind of weight weenine rides a Rivendell anyway?

Anonymous said...

Bikesnob,
Just got my new issue of Bicycling and the Elite Cyclist, Chris Carmichael is all over it. In his own column, car ad, and other contributors articles. You need to step up your game and get the same amount of elite attention from the mag.

CommieCanuck said...

For those missing BSNYC in the next two weeks, I will be reading aloud "Best of BSNYC" on HAM radio frequencies 3.750 - 4.000 Mhz.

CommieCanuck said...

Looks like Grant Peterson has decided his frame company should try and actually make money with the general public, as opposed to just the wealthy spinally-challenged.

omowo said...

Creedence? ... Discman? ...

... pffft ... poseur.

Anonymous said...

"Proud Mary, please keep on rollin'."

OMG! Sometimes the funniest lines here are in the comments. I lol'd!

We shall miss the snobbery!

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't hold out much hope for the credence

Red neckerson said...

IPOD USEN

POOP POST

That can't be malin you feel good about yorself

Unknown said...

Better CCR than the Eagles.

I miss you already.

Cool The Kid said...

2 year old missed connection????????????????? F-ing classic!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

David Lee Roth's audiobook indeed. I may just have to see if I can find me a copy of that anyway.

We should keep this comments thread active whilst snob is away (since the comments threads from BSNYC postings are pretty much my primary source for news & information these days.)

bikesgonewild said...

...sufferist...

...i was thinking along the lines of "theme from a summer place" by percy faith & his orchestra (please...i don't have the time, ask yer folks or yer grandparents) as a basic background piece...no lyrics...

...then maybe "summer song" by chad & jeremy...(really ???...doesn't anyone know their summer romance musical history ???)...

...schmaltzy as fuck but required listening would then be "sealed w/ a kiss" by brian hyland...dripping, oozing, retched excess...

...i'll grant ya "summer nights" from grease...i mean, travolta & newton-john ???...that's definitely in the "summer schmaltz" ballpark...

...& not beat this dead horse too long, we end it all w/ "see you in september" by the happenings (ain't that an apropo name ???) from 1966, which is undoubtedly the song bsnyc/rtms will be humming to hisself 'til the next post...

...stand back kasey kasim...

Fred Zeppelin said...

I'm kinda partial to Henley's The Boys of Summer, or In The Summertime by Mungo Jerry -try to get THAT outta your head.

But, for actual discman-era correctness, I think Summertime by DJ Jazzy Jeff, Fresh Prince, etc. is the tune to have.

omowo said...

Like this?

bikesgonewild said...

...fred zep...great summer songs... (mungo jerry ???...fuck, thank you...fergot all about "in the summertime"..."dadadidada, dadadadada", yep yer right, i will be hummin' that one)...but sorry, no schmaltz in yer list...

Anonymous said...

needs more cowbell

bikesgonewild said...

...wow !!!...reed enwright...when it comes to romantic summer schmaltz, you can never have to many "strings" or "strings attached" for that matter...nice...

Fierce Panties said...

FAIL!

See you on campus you snob!

Test Tickle said...

funny, both the Y Water and Unicycle videos have a similar hit count. Are we the only people paying attention to this shite?

BADD VIDS

balls.

Daddo said...

where is she unsepiad and unclothed?

streepo said...

The Jamies "Summertime"

sum sum summertime
sum sum summertine
summmmeeerrrrttimmmee!!!

wishiwasmerckx said...

If your daddy's rich, you take her out for a meal...

sufferist said...

If her daddy's poor, ya do what you feel....

I always thought that was a bad moral lesson to impart to impressionable youth

sufferist said...

BGW: I don't need to ask my folks, I've been in several elevators and shopped at the local super-stroll consumer retail outlets. So I'm well versed.

How about, this summer tune...that's more my speed.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Sufferist, if your daddy's rich, you take her out for a meal, slip her a roofie, THEN just do what you feel, and if you get caught, well, daddy golfs with the DA and the judge, so....

Anonymous said...

The club racer fucking rocks, Rivendell or not.

Simon Davies said...

Hey!

I finished curating my bike.

I am rubbing a freewheel at the moment because I currently live in a very hilly part of Tokyo and I have had enough of spinning class.

Ironically it is not a full NJS build, even though I live near a Keirin race track.

I am sure the blend of steel and carbon will both delight and amuse you. Perhaps even titillate!

enjoy

Wes said...

Simon

Is that an ironic Spinergy?

Simon Davies said...

It is, but can you figure out why?

Anonymous said...

Foot of the gas. Not off.

Anonymous said...

Summer recess my ass. The book publisher gave him a deadline.

Anonymous said...

Taking the first week of September off? See you at Burning Man...

sufferist said...

wishiwasmerckx: is that part of the extended dance mix version? I never hear that version on the radio, also I believe that the date rape drug of choice back then was chloral hydrate.

Ronsonic said...

Well curated quiz and post, Snob.

southpole said...

wheels of change: id will be easy: pompino with moustache handlebars and a rock racing jersey, as seen in the nyc article

wishiwasmerckx said...

Snobbatical theory #2: Brazilian wax job gone horribly wrong, along with some time off for taintal healing.

red neckerson said...

since snobber is gone fer now i need you yankee fellers to hep me out

what give you more self rijus points

yellin at a woman driving a dam minivan with a greenpeace sticker "quit wasting gas and stop making so many babies"

or

yellin at a prius diver "quit wasting so much gas you cocksucker"

i was riding my bike both times and aint sure which i should be more proud of

Anonymous said...

wishiwasmerckx has it,
snobby is getting new diktats, and you know they hurt something fierce.

Heal in peace.

Lt. Cmdr. Thomas 'Tom' Dodge said...

Welcome aboard!

limo hire said...

I like this opportunity

Internet SPellings Nazi said...

Flambulliently? Flamboyance crossed with ebullience? Spellsing mistake or coinage?

ant1 said...

ant1st!

sufferist said...

I'm trying to think of a way to conduct, a preferably daily, blog-podium race with a random start time. Nothing seems to be clicking though.

Ideas are:
1.) Linked to the DJIA, as soon as it gains or drops 5% or gets over some value.
2.) Linked to a designated blogger starter issuing keyword.
3.) Linked to the first Anon asking what X is? (X= RTMS, diktats, etc...)
4.)Blog entry #X (X=100, 150, etc..)

Anonymous said...

Hey.

Can anyone tell me what RTMS stands for?

Thanks

Wes said...

1st.

Wes said...

Like that, Sufferist?

sufferist said...

WES: yes, you are the winner! Feel proud for your accomplishments. All hail the vanquisher!

I think that the process could use some improvement. After some analysis, it appears to me that there is an actual possibility for an unsavory character to manipulate the process...not that any of the regulars out here would have the moral turpitude to commit such an egregious act, but I'm saying it's a possibility.

Congrats again. Feel great!

mikeweb said...

I'm back from my surprise trip to the special island where every day is "Wednesday afternoon". Alas, I will have to wait another 10-ish days before the next installment of Snobertainment.

Wes said...

Sufferist

I see your point. Someone with fewer scruples than ourselves could manipulate the comments board for their own gain. Cads.

Anonymous said...

I concur with Wes.

Anonymous said...

Yeah. Wes is right.

Wes said...

Bing.

CommieCanuck said...

Can anyone tell me what RTMS stands for?

If only there was a way to get information and facts by searching a huge database. You could just type in a few terms, then tiny elves with IT certificates from deVry would work tirelessly for about 5 seconds and return the answer.

A new way of "looking" at the internet, I think I'll call it something like, "goggles".

Anonymous said...

"Hey.

Can anyone tell me what RTMS stands for?

Thanks"

One of the stars of Men In Black might be able to help...

Anonymous said...

Hey-

Can anyone tell me what the Google is?

Anonymous said...

Who are the stars of Men in Black?

sufferist said...

CommieCanuck: I sense a hint of sarcasm in your response. Has Canada become so pedestrian that you have spun into a callous state of ennui? I guess there could be humor to be found in your response if you think about it. Like you were addressing the Anon in an intentionally obtuse manner...you clever dog...is that what you're up to? Anyway, hoist a Molson and enjoy the day...for soon our snob returns...

bikesgonewild said...

...!!! sdrawkcab si gnihtyreve - wow...

...ts1...

bikesgonewild said...

...most strange...

...everything came out backwards...

...must be monday & a lack a "snobberish"...

sufferist said...

BGW: get out of the mirror, freakin' narcissist..

bikesgonewild said...

...narcissus-ist ???...don't be foolish, i don't sell flowers...

sufferist said...

Oh, right, then carry on....

Surly Bastard said...

Mr. Red Neckerson:

I think I'd take great hillbilly pride in nailing the Prius driver as the cocksucker that he truly is. Plus it has a nice ring to it.

As far as the Greenpeace-rubbing-progressive-cnut in-the-mini-van: even we dumb-ass yankees know female mini-van drivers are stone deaf and stupid so it doesn't fucking matter what you yell at them.

ant1 said...

so, guess who got to pace Zabriskie from the top of paris mountain back down to downtown greenville during the us pro championships yesterday. Oh yeah.

bikesgonewild said...

...btw, red neckerson...

...as regards your quandary, i think "yellin at a woman driving a dam minivan with a greenpeace sticker "quit wasting gas and stop making so many babies" " has a certain expressive panache prob'ly not often found down 'viper' way...

...but when it comes to "self righteous" (self rijus) points, well sir, "yellin at a prius diver "quit wasting so much gas you cocksucker" " is well worthy of consideration 'cuz we all know everyone driving a prius is a self righteous cocksucker to begin with...

...either way, red, rest assured ya'll (not bad for a yankee, huh ???) can be proud of yer cycling & verbal exploits...

...just sayin'...

bikesgonewild said...

..."female mini-van drivers are stone deaf and stupid so it doesn't fucking matter what you yell at them."...good point, surly bastard & one i overlooked...

CommieCanuck said...

sufferist: Molson is the carbonated moose piss we export to the US.

It is very f-ing boring up here, we need a minotaur scandal.

sufferist said...

CC: First you would have to be at war with someone, in order to have prisoners to mistreat. Like when is that gonna happen? eh? I guess you could fashion a proxy scandal by using all the folks that were arrested for discourteous behavior, but it just doesn't have the same kinda gusto as using full-blown war criminals.

So would you consider drinking a Labatt? or a Moosehead?

I'm a trappist ale kinda fella myself.

Anonymous said...

Antoine, that is awesome!

Speaking of mini-vans & morals, having a dilemma regarding my volunteering with the ToM. If they ask me to drive, I should really tell them no cuz I don't think I can handle a passenger van but oh, the opportunity to have one of the teams to myself for awhile is tempting. But then again, I don't wanna be the one who wrecks the friggin' van with the Saxo boys or Quikstep on board.

bikesgonewild said...

...i say "fuck a buncha onion breathed 'minotaurs'"...

...red neckerson brought it to the table & i think it's worthy to discuss prius's & their overwhelmingly "self righteous" attitude-y drivers...
...(this is not a scientific study, so this prob'ly only encompasses 99% of 'em...there's a few out there that "get it")...

...actual fact:- here in california, to encourage the use of "alternative source" vehicles, it was decided years ago & a law was passed to allow single occupant vehicles of a "green" nature, ie: prius's, honda insight's, which were certified by the e.p.a. to travel in the "commute lane" during "rush hours" to reward & encourage them for their active environmental participation...

...actual fact:- gov terminator has since rescinded that law...why ???...because rather than utilizing the privilege as intended, the majority of said drivers simply clogged the commute lane without consideration for "speed of traffic" flow...

...therefore...

...bgw speculation:- i contend that these self righteous "simple minded greenies" are actually one reason we are concerned about overall rising world temperatures...

...the "constantly being irked" & the fomenting ire n' anger of being stuck behind one of these blithe idiots & their "I'M saving the world" attitude is raising our blood pressures & our core body temperatures...

...need i say more ???...somewhere, a little penguin or maybe a polar bear cub aren't gonna make it this year & you can blame those "concerned" self righteous "environmentally active" "cocksuckers"...

...i'm w/ ya on this issue, red neckerson...

sufferist said...

Frilly: go for it, you'll be fine. It's an opportunity which could lead to greater things or at least fine memories. If you are worried about the driving, go rent a passenger van and do a complimentary delivery service in your city and get the feel for how it handles.

JĂŁo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
bikesgonewild said...

...damn...got to my local natural food store a few hours after posting about prius's & low & behold there were five, count 'em 5 sitting there side by side...

...thought it was a conspiracy & that they were out to get me...

...phewww, i made it...

PANTS said...

DAMN 122nd
I knew I shouldn't have switched to the Y water.
Doesn't fit in my bottle cage too easily and really hard to drink anally when on the move.

omowo said...

@ sufferist

sufferist said...

Reed: please send a sample...thanks

Surly Bastard said...

Five Prius's? Or should it be five Priusi?
Or how about five Priususes?
Whatever, they all sound like they need to be drained with a nine gauge needle and followed up with a strong regime of antibiotics.

bikesgonewild said...

...can anyone tell me what "X" stands for ???...

...1st...

...huh ???...what scruples ???...sheesh...

bikesgonewild said...

...surly bastard...

...that might be a good solution...they weren't there as a group, it was pure happenstance & every one a' the drivers looked like the type that would be clogging up the works, somewhere down the road...

sufferist said...

BGW: typically "X" marks the spot, in this case it is the spot where you might substitute a particular value for the general placeholder value. It can also stand for "was a one time", as in ex-champion, but that has a different syntactic aesthetic, but sounds the same.

Hope this helps...

bikesgonewild said...

...oh, great !!!...a literal translation...

...are the psychological ramifications not obvious here...surely you can see that despite my seemingly not wanting to shoot for the podium on a regular basis, the truth is...

...i just wanna be 1ST...1ST...1ST...

...& i wanna throw bernard hinault off the podium just 'cuz i'll be there so often that he'll bother me...

...i've never revealed these desires & gosh, now i feel so clear...

sufferist said...

BGW: you are among friends here...feel free to bear your soul...there could be no inadvertent repercussions...you are safe...you are on the internet...let'er rip...

bikesgonewild said...

...it all started w/ that first red raleigh 3sp & vittorio de sica's "ladri di bicyclette" (the bicycle thief)...but "pee-wee's BIG adventure" really brought it home...

...for some, it was "breaking away w/ ("papa, papa, i'm italiano")or even "american flyers" (sheesh) but no, for me, ya, it was pee-wee that really brought the message home...

...that single minded focus, that drive, that determination & in the end he'd not only ridden past those tour de france guys but he got his bike & his girl back...

...that's a powerful message & i started thinkin' "hmmm, bet i'd look good in yellow after a month in france"...

...well, needless to say, that never happened but w/ a little focus, a little determination & a reset button, dammit i can make the podium...

...just sayin', doc, just sayin'...

bikesgonewild said...

...fuck...in realityville, chris horner just broke more "stuff" & is out !!!...dammit...

ant1 said...

I saw that. How many races has he finished this year? There's rumors out there that he might take a DS position with BMC. I'd love to see him playing DS, but not just yet.

Anonymous said...

Seeing as you have managed to "break through" almost entirely on your own steam... I thought I should step in and help you get some "closure".

anemic biker said...

Have a nice one, BSNYC. We'll miss you. You may like this article btw haha : http://tinyurl.com/nuvtwa

anemic biker said...

Have a nice one, BSNYC. We'll miss you. You may like this article btw haha.

bikesgonewild said...

...ant1...horner has gotten more miles in than robbie mcewan this season but damned if they're both not snakebit...

...it's a shame 'cuz they're both nearing the end of good careers & horner in particular seemed "on point" to get those results he deserves...

...horner eventually as a directeur sportif ???...i can definitely see that...

Squib said...

Bike Snob you didn't go to burning man did you?

CommieCanuck said...

CC: First you would have to be at war with someone, in order to have prisoners to mistreat...So would you consider drinking a Labatt? or a Moosehead?

Canada is currently at war in Afghanistan, defending democracy and the right of rape within marriage. Get off the plane, step on a mine, and you're a "hero", and people cry like it was all unavoidable.

Beer is nice for women, but it just makes me pee and burp.

G.W. Bridge said...

Mr. Snob - good job photographing those sleeping bridge watchers.
You're making good use of your down time.

sufferist said...

CC: Well there you go, wrangle up some of them evil doers and you're off to a good start.

Beer is nice for women, but it just makes me pee and burp.
What does a manly Canadian drink then? Is there a fermented bacon beverage that I don't know about?

Anonymous said...

Can anyone tell me what Commiecanuck stands for? And does he wear a bow tie in real life?

bikesgonewild said...

...cool...

...1st...

bikesgonewild said...

...& btw...that was sanctioned & "scruplized", even on a rest day...

...i'm doing the "etape'" version...

sufferist said...

Anon 2:27: I think CC stands for courtesy, fair treatment of farm animals and the right to marry your sister.

sufferist said...

DJIA is at 9318 right now. When it reaches +-10pts. That's the starting gun. Best of luck to everyone...

Wes said...

Sufferist

So, like now?

sufferist said...

DJIA:9280 (3:11)

2nd place, after Wes

Anonymous said...

Who the hell watches the stock market anymore? That was sooo 2006!

bikesgonewild said...

...protest to the race commisar...i call egregious foul...

..."1.) Linked to the DJIA, as soon as it gains or drops 5% or gets over some value."...bleeh !!!...
...index, schmindex...that's an exclusionary language not all of us speak...but fine...

...more importantly...anon 2:27pm instigated the days podium dash by asking "can anyone tell me what commiecanuk stands for...???"...
...hey...i didn't introduce this into the by-laws but nonetheless here it stands..."3.) Linked to the first Anon asking what X is? (X= RTMS, diktats, etc...)"...

...obviously "X = commiecanuk" in this instance...need i say more ???...

...i'd have my lawyer explain this to ya but the ex-attorney general is too busy trying to murder cyclists up in toronto w/ his saab...

...i claim 1st podium spot gentlemen (& ladies)...questions ???...

sufferist said...

BGW: I guess you were the first in the Anon triggered race, Wes was first in the DJIA triggered race. (really though, since the race format had not been ratified into law, it's hard to say that any one of us is victor or vanquished)

It would be best if we agreed on a standard before the lack of such leads to more confusion.

I like the DJIA because it is more random and less prone to manipulation. If there is a better trigger, please advise.

Gomez Addams said...

I get my stock quotes on my ticker tape machine. I feel I am at a bit of a disadvantage. Maybe it's time to upgrade...to a crabon fibre ticker tape machine!

sufferist said...

Mr. Gomez: while carbon tape would be lighter, more horizontally rigid and vertically compliant, it is more to the point that the engine behind the tape's production is the real source of your disadvantage. Now if you meant that you were going to upgrade the engine of your device to crabon fibre, then yes, please with all haste, upgrade. You may not actually gain any speed, but it will look awesome in the clubhouse.

ant1 said...

nice work BGW.

ant1 said...

does the race reset now, or do we have to wait for the first "what does X stand for?" after a certain time, like noon eastern tomorow?

Anonymous said...

What is "crabon"? Is that a crustacean?

Wes said...

In case it has reset, I claim first after Anon 6:07's "what is crabon?".

bikesgonewild said...

...thank you, ant1...

...jeezus...let's not get so bloody arbitrary, wes...snobpostways are cyclic & generally once a day w/ occasional exceptions...

...therefore, what say the reset is based on the ***sun's*** both setting & then rising again which gives you east coasters a definite advantage ???...(but don't look over yer shoulder & never, ever count me out, dammit !!!)...

...as far as today is concerned ???, re:- "BGW: I guess you were the first in the Anon triggered race, Wes was first in the DJIA triggered race. (really though, since the race format had not been ratified into law, it's hard to say that any one of us is victor or vanquished)"...ever heard the expression "possession is 9/10 of the law" ???...

...recognize that guy standing next to moi ???...gentlemen, i assume you know monsieur bernard hinault ???...i suggest you hold yer places & don't even think about it !!!...

...so, i'll assume this forum is now open to discussion as regards race format initialization...& personally i hate the idea & find it highly ironic, that on bsnyc/rtms, anyone would drag the stock market & it's business-eeze through these august halls...

...bsnyc/rtms would go apoplectic...

...just sayin'...

sufferist said...

BGW: the DJIA is a daily proxy(qualifying under the sun-down/sun-up criteria) for our beloved regular trigger, taking the weekend off, as does our snob. I think that the Great Author would acknowledge the practical utility of the DJIA trigger as a useful stand-in.

If you can determine a better trigger, please advise.

sufferist said...

Q: What are normal trading hours?
A: New York: 9:30 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. Eastern Time.
A: California: 6:30 AM to 1 p.m. Pacific time.

I would like to say that if we do accept the DJIA as the trigger, that the next days race trigger criteria will be given by the winner of the previous days race.

Wes and BGW, you will have to work out tomorrow's trigger criteria between you two.

hillbilly said...

can't red trigger one? that would make sense to me....

and 1st.

erik k said...


Background Exercises No. 2 (essential snob reading)

ken e. said...

hah! i won't be fooled by laughing at old posts.
first!

bikesgonewild said...

...while i'm insistent on claiming today's (wednesday) post w/ the backing of the 'podium poseur tossing monsieur hinault,as per a format set by others, i certainly don't feel the need to be one who insists on thursday's format...

...personally i'm good w/ hillbilly's suggestion that red neckerson act as the trigger...i'd say when you hear that music from "deliverance", head for the line...the podium's waitin'...

...my only concern, however, as regards the constituents of 'viper' is the uttering of that word..."trigger"...i just don't want anybody gettin' shot over the internet 'cuz red neckerson, jolene or ol' ricky gets excited & starts firin' off a few rounds...

...just my $00.02 worth...

Anonymous said...

Movement against hipsters.
Starting.... now.

http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j148/clockwork420/imapcandimarmedqw2.jpg

redneckerson said...

Im havin me a soft boiled egg.

bikesgonewild said...

...shit, red neckerson...the damn sun ain't up yet, even in ny ny or i'd be 1st again...

redneckerson said...

tyin down the weasles. we got us a tonado.

sufferist said...

Suns up here!!!! #1.

sufferist said...

BGW: how about the word actuator instead of trigger with respect to Mr. Redneckerson...it carries more of the engineer chic that is so popular with the kids these days.

Anonymous said...

Is that the same as a Toe-nay-dough?

Anonymous said...

...wealthy spinally-challenged?

please explain.

hillbilly said...

dammit, i didn't expect red to be so friggin prompt!

sufferist said...

HB: the podium is still open!

ken e. said...

a somewhat more querulous "first?"
you people are hilarious!

"autumn first" with a big lead out by "rain"

Anonymous said...

GO!

Anonymous said...

1st!!! I win!!!

Anonymous said...

Now I wait for the offers from the big Euro teams? I think that's how it works...

Anonymous said...

And I wasn't doping...I swear!

hillbilly said...

I think I'm allergic to podiums....

sufferist said...

HB: this podium is hypo-allergenic, no need to fear.

Anonymous said...

Anon 2:27

I believe CC does wear a bow tie. A sad remembrance of his days with Team Chippendale.

grog said...

"x" is the plural of "eck". e.g.
Prius is okay if it gets me to the trailhead with my Trex.

Anonymous said...

I believe Trex is a deck material. Calfee's next frame material as well, so it's all good...

hillbilly said...

I'm not falling for that one again without a big stash of antibiotics

sufferist said...

HB: Load up on whatever you want, it's an all-drug race. I'm wearing my Amgen "EPO's alright by me" kit and riding my AMORFIX LIFE SCIENCES LTD bike (they do all my blood transfusions). So pop a few and get on board...

bikesgonewild said...

...suffer1st...'actuator' is good...if we keep up w/ the 'trigger' thingy, next we'd hear from the roy rogers lobby about improper blah, blah, blah & who needs the pressure...

...as far as "engineer chic" ???...one a' those days when i'm chasing those damn kids off a' my lawn, that 'pants down around their ass' thingy is gonna trip one of 'em up & then there's gonna be hell to pay, dad gummit...

...just sayin'...

sufferist said...

BGW: agreed, actuator it is...

I'm thinking that your milkshake is not so tempting, why all the kids in your yard?

Anonymous said...

Oh my God. Kara Goucher is so fucking hot!!!!

bikesgonewild said...

...milkshake ???...hell, that's a power smoothie made w/ the finest natural ingredients...well, that & a few of those awesome 'amgen' products which keep me "dancing on the pedals" (thank you, phil)...

...& kids ???...just their job to annoy "us old folks"...lookit contador & armstrong...

sufferist said...

BGW: no wonder they wanna get at your stuff...it sounds pretty potent...keep dancing on them pedals/petals/peddles etc....

I am slowly morphing into the old man mode myself. No kids in the yard just yet, but the neighbors cats are really starting to get to me.

CommieCanuck said...

What does a manly Canadian drink then? Is there a fermented bacon beverage that I don't know about?

Rye Whiskey, the original whiskey sold through Seagram's (Bronfman's)through Al Capone and used in a Manhattan during prohibition, then later replaced by Bourbon, or turpentine (same taste).

CommieCanuck said...

Anon 2:27: I think CC stands for courtesy, fair treatment of farm animals and the right to marry your sister.

OR your brother, this is Canada after all.

Oh, ...and fuck farm animals (not literally, that's a South Carolina thing.)

sufferist said...

CC:Thanks for the info, this dispels all those nasty rumors about Zima being the drink of choice in the Great Northern Nation of Cananda...

CommieCanuck said...

...i'd have my lawyer explain this to ya but the ex-attorney general is too busy trying to murder cyclists up in toronto w/ his saab...

You have no idea what shit-storm is occurring over this. The press is now interviewing bike messengers to uncover the hidden alternative sub-culture, using terms like "alley cats", "fixed gear" and "territory marking". Massive street protests by cyclist who don't even know or care that they guy killed was some 33 year old loser, who previously was in a drunken fight with his girlfriend, and decided to attack a car bare-handed and hang on to the bumper. This asshole just happened to meet up with the head asshole, the former attorney general.

So far, I've heard 5 bike culture stories on radio and TV, and 3 ex-girlfriends, one who he knocked-up and left. This guy had the kvorka.

One of those times you get embarrassed you ride a bike to work.

CommieCanuck said...

I believe CC does wear a bow tie. A sad remembrance of his days with Team Chippendale.

I'm the one with the blonde perm and gold chains.

Please ladies, no touching the dancers.

bikesgonewild said...

...commie canuck...refer to drunkcyclist.com & dig around if ya feel inclininated...

...i had quite a bit to say about it...

...ya, guy was a douche in his own right, perhaps, but the bottom line ???...

...the ex-attorney general used that saab as a murder weapon...

Anonymous said...

Hawt.

So that's what happened to Grizzly Adams. And why does Mr. Mullet in the back row get a gold bowtie?

Oh, and you could touch the dancers. I remember my older sister sneaking me in w/a fake ID. One of those idiots actually cleaned her glasses with his schlong. I threw up about five minutes later & remained a virgin until age 21. Post traumatic stress syndrome.

CommieCanuck said...

BGW: bottom line, it was a case of dumb meets dumber, one guy's dead, the other guy's life is ruined. Plenty of blame to go around and the AG is looking at serious jail time.

Frilly, effective use of "schlong" in comments.Kudos.
The gold tie indicates the guy who carries the baby oil, Old Spice, and tuba-tan. Simple, but effective system.

CommieCanuck said...

You can see a surveillance video of the death here.

In Toronto, it's common to see pissed off bike messengers reach into open windows and grab the driver's keys. Sheppard likely helped steer the car into the mailbox.

bikesgonepsychotic said...

...everyone here is a douchebag...

...plus or minus 4...

...fuck you, too...

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