Now the idea of "aero gains at any speed" may sound a bit self-contradictory, but it's important to remember that by making some small changes to your setup and riding style you can finish your ride more quickly, which has the overall effect of reducing the amount of time you're out there enjoying yourself. This is the very essence of road riding. To that end, here are the main tips contained in the video:
1) Don't leave your jacket on
That's right, by leaving your jacket on while you ride you're rendering yourself less aerodynamic. So take it off.
What's that? You're wearing the jacket because it's cold and you feel more comfortable with it on?
Well, perhaps road riding isn't for you. Didn't you hear the guy? You can use the time you save by not wearing a jacket to stop and eat a sandwich!* Now who doesn't love sandwiches?!?
2) Don't ride a "loosely-cabled" bikes
Apparently this is a thing. You'd think if your bike's cables were too loose you wouldn't be able to shift, but apparently not. Specialized is now selling a $75 cable tension meter so you can check yours before every ride.
3) Don't use a saddle pack
Why carry essential tools when you can shave essential seconds off your recreational bike ride? Plus, you can use the time you save to eat that sandwich while waiting for your spouse or life partner to come pick you up.
4) Don't use lights
Aerodynamics trump visibility always. Sure, you might get sideswiped by a driver, but the ambulance ride is yet another perfect opportunity to break out that sandwich.
5) Get a new helme(n)t
See the vapor flowing over the helme(n)t? That's the hot air of PURE SPEED!
6) Get new clothes
Tighter, more aerodynamic clothing reveals the curves of your flabby, dimpled body. This is performance-enhancing, because everybody knows that dimples are aero.
Now get out there and ride, you uncomfortable sausage!
*It is highly inadvisable to both wear a jacket while cycling and stop for a sandwich when you're hungry, as nourishment and thermal comfort are conducive to cycling enjoyment.
But first, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right then good, and if you're wrong you'll see cows.
Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and stay aero.
--Wildcat Rock Machine
1) Leaked data indicates Chris Froome's maximum heart rate on Mont Ventoux was:
--61 beats per minute
--116 beats per minute
--161 beats per minute
--Undetectable, as Chris Froome is clinically dead
2) Pyongyang, North Korea is now officially more bike-friendly than NSW, Australia.
(Hydroformed aircraft grade aluminum sandwich containment system)
3) What's in this sandwich?
--Peanut butter and jelly
--Peanut butter and banana
--Tuna fish and raisins
--Pâté, caviar, and dry cat food
4) The town of Southold on Long Island has officially banned:
--All cycling events from June 1st to November 1st
5) The bicycle is the clearly most important invention in modern history.
(He was also the prototype for the silent movie villain)
6) Mike Sinyard invented the safety bicycle in 1882.
7) Sadly, thanks to the gravel craze, you can say "hello" once again to the:
--27" road wheel
--Bicycle tire wiper
***Special "The Dingoes Ate His Baby"-Themed Bonus Video!***
The dogs would never catch him on a Venge-Schmenge.