A broken clock is right twice a day, while a broken Apple Watch is never right at all.

(Further to Friday's discussion about symbols...)

Well, the Touring of France is over, and to celebrate, Chris Froome chugged gazpacho from a giant bowl:

Presumably he's relieved that the Tour is over, because now he can take a much-needed rest from being showered in bodily fluids:

PARIS, (AFP) — Chris Froome said he felt “incredible” after winning his second Tour de France title on Sunday in a competition that has seen him accused of cheating, spat upon, and doused with urine.

And that's not even counting the incessant snot rocket mist that is a normal part of riding in a tight pack of roadies.

No wonder these guys are always getting sick--not only are they constantly being spritzed with saliva, mucus, and pee, but they're also all at least 30 pounds underweight and on drugs.

Indeed, physiologically speaking, there's little difference between a professional cyclist and a "crust punk" band member.  (Though socioeconomically the "crust punk" is roughly 20 times more likely to hail from a wealthy Greenwich family.)

Still, Froome isn't complaining about all the urine.  In fact, it seems he kinda likes it:

“Of course it was a very, very difficult Tour, both on the bike and off it. I’m so happy to be here in yellow..."

See that?  He's happy to be in yellow.

So there you go.

Meanwhile, Dorothy Rabinowitz must be plotzing, because her newspaper is way into Citi Bike now:

Citi Bike still isn’t perfect. Over the course of 15 test rides and 45 miles of biking, I encountered four docking snafus, a sticky gear shifter and one flat tire. But overall, the new Citi Bike experience is like cruising on a different planet: a magical world where a bright blue bike waits on every third street corner to provide fun, convenient transport—assuming you don’t get clipped by a cab.

Four docking snafus, a sticky gear shifter and one flat tire?  Sounds like an evening with Mario Cipollini after he's had too much to drink:

("Sorry for docking snafus, dees a-never happen to da Cipo, I swear!")

As a Citi Bike user I agree that the system has improved tremendously, and indeed there's a lot to love about the convenience of bike share--though I'd stop short of saying the bikes themselves are the best part:

The bikes were always the best part of the system. Sturdy and tank-like, they breeze over cobblestones, curbs and potholes the size of kiddie pools. But the new model is even better. The brakes are tighter, the gears are smoother and there’s a blingy new light on the back fender. The handlebars collect a lot less schmutz.

Seriously, the bikes were always the best part?  That's like saying the best part of the subway system is the hard plastic seats.  (Though I'd certainly rather have hard plastic seats than the disgusting bacteria-ridden cloth they have on the BART.)  I do agree though that the new Ben Serotta-designed Cit Bikes are more responsive and "flickable" than the old model while still retaining the bone-jarring tankishness we bike-sharers so cherish--even though the author of the Journal piece clearly lacks the Cat 6 skillz to squeeze maximum performance from the machine:

My one gripe: Citi Bike has maintained the stingy time limits on how long you can keep a bike before returning it and borrowing another. Annual pass holders get 45 minutes; short-termers, just half an hour. If you’re obeying traffic laws, that isn’t enough time to get anywhere in New York.

Clearly she needs to subscribe to my Team Citi Bike Cat 6 coaching system, because according to my Citi Bike account I can do DUMBO, Brooklyn ("DUMBO" is an acronym for Douchebags Under the Manhattan Bride Overpass") to Grand Central in just over 30 minutes:

Keep in mind this route includes the dreaded Manhattan Bridge climb, which is the Tourmalet of Cat 6 ascents.  Also, I set this time on one of the old Citi Bikes, and I'm confident that the improved lateral stiffness, vertical compliance, and racier gear ratios of the new Serotta model would easily erase that 55 second deficit and have me docking at Pershing Square well inside of the 30-minute non-member time limit.  (Not that I have to worry about that, I am of course a Citi Bike founding member, not some sad non-member Citi Fred.)

I bet the new bikes are also more aerodynamic, which means that by Lennard Zinn's water bucket metric I'd save a whole gazpacho tureen's worth of time.

Speaking of the new Citi Bikes, I was riding one last week when I encountered this food cart in the bike lane:

I circumvented it handily, thanks to both the bike's improved geometry coupled with my own razor sharp Citi Bike handling skills:

What sets a semi-professional bike blogger and accomplished Cat 6 Citi Bike racer like me apart from the ordinary cyclist is the ability to: 1) avoid a food cart in the bike lane; 2) take a photo while doing so; and 3) press that "switcheroo" button on the screen and then take another over-the-shoulder shot of the same food cart receding into the distance, which you can see me doing in this reflection from my douchey sunglasses:

Not only that, but while doing all of this I was fondling my ego by reading my own blog:

Incredible.

Anyway, given all this success, it's no surprise that Citi Bike is expanding to a whole bunch of new neighborhoods in which you'll never be able to afford to live:

But you'll be able to borrow a Citi Bike while you're visiting, so at least there's that.

Lastly, according to the Twitter, Walmart continues to be totally up on the current offroad bicycling trends:

@bikesnobnyc here's the latest bicycle trend to be walmartized: 29+. pic.twitter.com/XNXcEVZNyz

— Kristian Musser (@kristian_musser) July 27, 2015

Sweet ride:

I expect a bikepacking bike from Kent any day now.