(It's the new golf, you know.)
Good morning class. It's a Friday late in the school year, and I see you all fidgeting. Therefore, I'm going to go ahead and give you your quiz now so you can start your weekends early and your teacher can start drinking. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right that's fantastic, and if you're wrong you'll see the hour record.
Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and enjoy--and don't forget to watch the bonus video to the very end, because it's amazing and potentially life-changing.
--Wildcat Rock Machine
1) What do these numbers mean?
--Aspect is usually expressed in degrees from north
--Slope, aspect, and surface curvature in terrain analysis are all derived from neighborhood operations using elevation values of a cell's adjacent neighbours
--Slope is a function of resolution, and the spatial resolution used to calculate slope and aspect should always be specified
--Dude, you like totally need a road bike with a Lefty because it's rad
2) The Broken Bones Bicycles crabon road bike is called:
--"The Failure Mode"
--"The Warranty Replacement"
--"The Douche Chariot"
3) In 1989, Tour de Trump promoter Donald Trump sued Tour de France organizer the Amaury Sport Organisation for copyright infringement.
("I'm this many!")
4) How old did Eddy Merckx turn this week?
5) Podium ceremony "curated" by:
--"Hostessen Service No Limit"
--"Femmes en Fietsen"
--"Hostessen Service No Handjob"
(The most labor-intensive hydration system I've ever seen.)
6) Apparently people in Portland have nothing better to do than carry beverages around in leather.
(We're only making plans for Nigel.)
7) What is the "ShockWiz?"
***Special Incredible Outlaw Bikepacker-Themed Bonus Video!***
Did he say "a tortured soul on a bike ride to Hell?"
That's pretty much every Tour de France winner from the past 100 years.