Friday, September 2, 2011

BSNYC Friday Foot Quiz! (And Away-Going Announcement)

Monday, September 19th is a very special day. Why? Because that will be the date of my next blog post!

Yes, that's right, circumstances require that as of today I take temporary leave of this blog until Monday, September 19th, at which point I will return with regular updates. This leave has been in the offing for quite some time, so don't act all surprised about it, even though I haven't mentioned a thing about it on this blog until just now. Also, I won't bore you with what I'll be doing during my leave, though I can confirm that I will not be doing any of the following:

--Going to Interbike
--Going to Eurobike
--Going to the Vuelta a EspaƱa
--Going to Rock and Roll Fantasy Camp™
--Getting an adult Bar Mitzvah

In my absence, I suggest that you follow my Twittering account just in case I have important news to relate, such as my consumption and enjoyment of a particularly tasty brand of corn chip that I think you might also like to try. (Where's that check, Doritos people?) And speaking of Twitter, a fellow Tweeterer recently alerted me to the existence of this:


It would appear that someone is trying to achieve a sort of arch McSweeney's-meets-Cycle-Chic effect by combining photos of models on bicycles with prose like this:

When piloting your velocipede it is imperative that you consider prudence, modesty, and decorum at all times, lest you be sanctioned by local law-keepers for improper attire. For, you see, high moral conduct is the chief concern of our metropolitan constabulary, and young women on bicycles must bear in mind the moral weakness of pedestrians as they navigate our sin-besotted conurbation.

In other words, don't ride with your ass crack showing.

As for the so-called "Brooklyn Magazine" itself, I had never come across it before, but the following video they've produced is a pretty good summation of the current state of affairs:

Brooklyn Magazine Promo from Louis Gruber on Vimeo.

Yes, Brooklyn does have many faces, and they make you want to grab them by their patterned scarves and shout horrible, horrible things into them.

In any event, pending my return, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right you'll feel inexplicably tingly, and if you're wrong you'll hear a song.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and I look forward to "seeing" you when I return on September 19th.


--Wildcat Rocking Chair


(You can't tell from the picture, but it's pretty wild.)





1) The speed at which a retrogrouch goes "Woo hoo!" is:






(Off to a foffing good start.)

2) There is only one Dmitry Fofonov.

--True
--False





“But with the miles, the pain from the hole in my perineum got stronger."

3) Who said this?





4) This $5,500 titanium and belt-driven commuter:








5) Do police officers hate cyclists?

--Yes
--No




6) To this day, nothing gets attention in Williamsburg like a nice set of:






7) Hooray! It's ________:





***Special Health-Themed Bonus Question!***

In addition to exposing the dangers of excessive groin and ass use, this graphic also quantifies the importance of:



2,023 comments:

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Blog Drafter said...

I practice typing, spelling, and punctuation.

Blog Drafter said...

I drag someone else to the line.

Blog Drafter said...

I did that a couple times in the original contests.

Blog Drafter said...

I'm used to it by now, c'mon along.

Blog Drafter said...

I'm not going to cheat.

Blog Drafter said...

No numbers.

Blog Drafter said...

No periods.

Blog Drafter said...

Jus typin.

Blog Drafter said...

Jus typin

Blog Drafter said...

Can't think of a single joke.

Blog Drafter said...

One thousand two hundred twenty three.

Blog Drafter said...

No Anonymous posting either.

Blog Drafter said...

Although this name is the same thing as Anonymous, I know that.

Blog Drafter said...

I'm not new to these Internets.

Blog Drafter said...

Anybody out there?

Blog Drafter said...

No, well then 1228 is all mine.

Blog Drafter said...

I like to type.

Blog Drafter said...

As long as the sentences are short, that is.

Blog Drafter said...

Seventy short comments to go.

Blog Drafter said...

You know, I thought I could do this.

Blog Drafter said...

But I'm already having doubts.

Blog Drafter said...

Hey, how 'bout them Yankees?

Blog Drafter said...

(I realize that may have been uncalled for.)

Blog Drafter said...

I've never won a bicycling contest before.

Blog Drafter said...

Whoops, I meant "bicycle cycling" contest.

Blog Drafter said...

Getting close to half-way.

Blog Drafter said...

I'm glad I have a quiet keyboard.

Blog Drafter said...

And I recently cut my nails as well.

Blog Drafter said...

Don't want to wake up anybody up.

Blog Drafter said...

Shhh!

Blog Drafter said...

Let's see, 1243.

Blog Drafter said...

And 1244.

Blog Drafter said...

I put an "And" in there so that it qualifies.

Blog Drafter said...

Hmm, an "And" or a "And"?

Anonymous said...

Twelve hundred and forty seven.

Blog Drafter said...

This is going faster than I thought it would.

Blog Drafter said...

Half way almost.

Blog Drafter said...

I DO NOT live in NYC.

Blog Drafter said...

One thing, I wish Snob would stop with that pic of the lady on the recumbent.

Blog Drafter said...

There's lots better pics out there.

Blog Drafter said...

I sometimes wonder what would happen...

Blog Drafter said...

if Babe caught up to Snob, you know, royalties and all that.

Blog Drafter said...

I doubt it was a truly public picture, it looks staged to me.

Blog Drafter said...

Hey, just sayin'

Blog Drafter said...

I hear that someone banned "hey, just sayin." as being too banal and all.

Blog Drafter said...

Times change, they sure do.

Blog Drafter said...

Well, well, 1259, hello to you.

Blog Drafter said...

My typing is getting worse here.

Blog Drafter said...

Worser and worser.

Blog Drafter said...

AT 1262!!!!

Blog Drafter said...

I'm not a very good typist actually.

Blog Drafter said...

My eyes are still mostly tethered to the keyboard.

Blog Drafter said...

Who cares, right? Right!

Blog Drafter said...

One's typing skills are rarely mentioned in public.

Blog Drafter said...

Once, I was on a bike ride (this is not a joke)...

Blog Drafter said...

on a local bike trail.

Blog Drafter said...

There's a notorious corner

Blog Drafter said...

that locals call "hey, watch out for shit coming around that corner" corner.

Blog Drafter said...

Or something to that effect.

Blog Drafter said...

Anyway, as I was approaching that corner this day,

Blog Drafter said...

which was a Sunday (WARNING!)

Blog Drafter said...

I hear this loud Fred coming around this corner.

Blog Drafter said...

(This corner is the closest thing to a blind corner you can get without being totally blind.)

Blog Drafter said...

Oh, yeah, 1276.

Blog Drafter said...

I hear this Fred saying, "yeah, it was right here."

Blog Drafter said...

I sat up and tensed, shit!

Blog Drafter said...

And Fred, mid-sentence about someone else's accident at that corner blitzes into view.

Blog Drafter said...

One quarter second after I get out of the way.

Blog Drafter said...

And he smacks right into the fence right behind me.

Blog Drafter said...

FREDS!

Blog Drafter said...

Oh yeah, at 1283, let me just say that I am not a Fred.

Blog Drafter said...

No sir. NOT. A. FRED.

Blog Drafter said...

Sometimes my wife thinks I ride with a guy named Fred.

Blog Drafter said...

Speaking of wich...

Blog Drafter said...

Damn, spelled that wrong.

Blog Drafter said...

Which...

Blog Drafter said...

Hmm, 1289

Blog Drafter said...

I believe its time to form a train...

Blog Drafter said...

Time, and race miles have zipped by...

Blog Drafter said...

I'll have to be sure to spell "Palmares" right.

Blog Drafter said...

One thousand two hundred ninety two.

Blog Drafter said...

Oops, got that wrong, one thousand two hundred and ninety four...

Blog Drafter said...

ninety five...

Blog Drafter said...

This will never show up on my resumƩ, I hope.

Blog Drafter said...

Wait for it...

Blog Drafter said...

Oh, so sleepy all of a sudden.

Blog Drafter said...

And the winner is:

Anonymous said...

turteen hunnid! i thought i said KNEEL BEFORE ZOD.

Anonymous said...

Blog Drafter, you are an inspiration. In Fear of Zod, get back up on your feet. I wasn't being serious. Everybody else, last one to fourteen's a bag of rats.

Anonymous said...

It's not a widely known fact, but never the less a fact, that KNEEL BEFORE ZOD was once first in a bsny comments race. remember? that time it was down? switched to wordpress? he smartly seized the initiative and called first in the previous day's post's comment section? remember that?

Nogocyclist said...

Oh no, it's not over?

What can I say!

PawnShop said...

Last!!

Epic M.D said...

This isn't happening. Still, something's happening.

Nogocyclist said...

I China during a bicycle race, a helicopter blew a road sign banner ad lose. This caused a professional cyclist involved in the race to wreak.

Not only are the cars and trucks after us, now aircraft are also!

Nogocyclist said...

The link to the crash caused by a helicopter at the Tour of Beijing.
Tour of Beijing 2011-Stage 3 - Final km's (incl. Yannick Eijssen crash)

Jonathan said...

Shit the bed! 1300 comments!

Blog Drafter said...

Not, Amen.

Blog Drafter said...

AHEM!

Blog Drafter said...

There will be sprints.

Blog Drafter said...

...later

Blog Drafter said...

I will pause at 1314.

Blog Drafter said...

OK, chores done.

Blog Drafter said...

Insert silly comment here________

Blog Drafter said...

I believe I will

Blog Drafter said...

curate a blogular

Blog Drafter said...

comment here.

Blog Drafter said...

Of a minimalist nature:

Blog Drafter said...

1320!

Blog Drafter said...

1321

Blog Drafter said...

1322

Blog Drafter said...

Thirteen and a quarter.

Blog Drafter said...

I've been thinking a lot about Middle Earth today.

Blog Drafter said...

And I don't know why.

Blog Drafter said...

Middle Earth, nothing Minimalist about that.

Blog Drafter said...

Why do French philosophers have all the cool names?

Blog Drafter said...

1329

Blog Drafter said...

1330

Blog Drafter said...

Not quite feelin it here.

Blog Drafter said...

Legs are a little dead from last night.

Blog Drafter said...

I thought of a little rhyme last night.

Blog Drafter said...

"Yes, your hirsuteness"

Blog Drafter said...

"Yes, your heinous."

Blog Drafter said...

"Gee, that seatpost hurts."

Blog Drafter said...

"Stuck up my an..."

Blog Drafter said...

I can't say that word.

Blog Drafter said...

I can't even type it.

Blog Drafter said...

Just thinking of old Tom B. there.

Blog Drafter said...

That had to have hurt, with it being so hot and all.

Blog Drafter said...

Well, 1342

Blog Drafter said...

1342

Blog Drafter said...

And 1343.

Blog Drafter said...

And 2 and 3 and go!

Blog Drafter said...

Ha, a musical reference.

Blog Drafter said...

Best way to sprint is to craft a musical comment on the way to the line.

Blog Drafter said...

A curitanical blogular note.

Blog Drafter said...

Uh, C Flat maybe.

Blog Drafter said...

No, Sharp. Yes, Sharp for sure.

Blog Drafter said...

Damn, I could have

Blog Drafter said...

split that comment up

Blog Drafter said...

like this one.

Blog Drafter said...

Who is this ZOD character?

Blog Drafter said...

Is there a disturbance in LOB's force field here.

Blog Drafter said...

Perhaps ZOD is LOB's archangel.

Blog Drafter said...

Or vise versa.

Blog Drafter said...

Perhaps ZOD stands guard in front of LOB's force field and makes people kneel, as that guy said.

Blog Drafter said...

Oh, a guy named Anonymous.

Blog Drafter said...

He or she needs a cute name, Like Blog Drafter or something like that.

Blog Drafter said...

I picked up that name in the Comments a couple weeks ago.

Blog Drafter said...

If you recall, there was that person trying to sound smart.

Blog Drafter said...

And failing at it.

Blog Drafter said...

Accusing Snob of something, I can't quite remember what.

Blog Drafter said...

Or maybe he was accusing the commentators of drafting Snob.

Blog Drafter said...

Or accusing Snob of drafting Society or something.

Blog Drafter said...

Anyway, it sounded sort of Artisanal.

Blog Drafter said...

So I said to myself, I need a moniker here, I'll use that.

Blog Drafter said...

So there's a little insight.

Blog Drafter said...

Into nothing.

Blog Drafter said...

Wow, 1370, time does fly.

Blog Drafter said...

I'm actually ahead of last night's pace.

Blog Drafter said...

I will pause for comments by other commenters who might be here.

Blog Drafter said...

at 1374.

Blog Drafter said...

OK, it was a short pause.

Blog Drafter said...

..76

Blog Drafter said...

..77

Blog Drafter said...

..78

Blog Drafter said...

I believe two ellipses is correct here.

Blog Drafter said...

To replace two numbers.

Blog Drafter said...

Like this:

Blog Drafter said...

..82

Blog Drafter said...

Or it could be that three is correct, like this:

Blog Drafter said...

...84

Blog Drafter said...

Hmm, can't decide.

Blog Drafter said...

Need. Copy. Editor.

Blog Drafter said...

1387

Blog Drafter said...

One thousand three hundred and eighty eight!

Blog Drafter said...

Who ever thought

Blog Drafter said...

it would come to this.

Anonymous said...

OK, 1390

Blog Drafter said...

Oops, hit the Anon button.

Blog Drafter said...

Crazy things happen in these sprints...

Blog Drafter said...

The Missile better drive straight today...

Blog Drafter said...

cause here we go!

Blog Drafter said...

My man's losing it up front!

Blog Drafter said...

I'm going around!

Blog Drafter said...

Sprint in dem gears!

Blog Drafter said...

Cry dem tears!

Amazed We've Stuck With This said...

1400!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for the Jens-like domestiquing Blog Drafter!

GUOL,TFF said...

1401 PODIYUMMMM!!

I fear ZOD no more!!!

Blog Drafter: Selflessly curating the artisanal leadout!! You, Sir or Ma'am, deserve a Pro-Tour comtract with the team of your choice! Tank-Yu!!!

Anonymous said...

Blog Drafter keep up the good work.

Congratulations GUOL, TFF.

My Name is Meaningless said...

Blog Drafter, the hours of your posting bring up a question. Why are you posting something of such importance at such a time as then?

The possibilities include, (1) you have a job where you just have to be there and you are doing it because you are bored.

(2) You could be on a mind altering substance and it leads you to such behavior.

(3) When you post is not actually at the time stated, due to your being in another time zone. It just appears you are up real late taking your pull.

(4) You are just weird enough to do it. (Would make you too much like me.)

Maybe someone can come up with some more interesting possibilities and post them singularly to make a new run up to 1600.

Meaningless Name One said...

It is because you are being held hostage by Vito. WRM's helper monkey wants the comments to set a record for the most Blogspot comments for a day and he will not realise you until they do.

Meaningless One said...

Blog Drafter has signed up for a drug trial. The new drug will be approved, but it will have one real interesting side effect.

Use will cause people to spend hours typing comments when they have absolutely nothing to say on various blogs all over the Internet, just because of the effects of the drug.

Meaningless said...

What is the new drug for, you ask?

Erectile dysfunction.

Meaningless said...

In the future when Recumbabe says "Honey come to bed, I ..."

You will answer, "Hold on I just to make one more comment."

Meaningless Comment Maker said...

Sorry, no edit option here.

Correction:
In the future when Recumbabe says "Honey come to bed, I ..."

You will answer, "Hold on I just want to make one more comment."

Anonymous said...

KNEEL BEFORE ZOD.

Reluctant About Kneeling Before ZOD said...

Do we HAVE to kneel before Zod? I mean, look, there's broken glass all over the ground and fresh dog poo, fer chrissake! Can't we just WAVE HEARTILY BEFORE ZOD and skip the kneeling thing? Huh?

Blog Drafter said...

I will throw a short quiz out here, in the Snobular style:

ZOD is:

1. LOB's "Cabana Boy"
2.Vitto's "Cage Minder"
3. Mitt Romney's Finance Manager.
4. Jebus' stunt double.

Now, don't bother me, I'm at work.

Blog Drafter said...

OK, WooHoo, there's a party downstairs.

FAS said...

And we're going.

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