Tuesday, September 29, 2009

More Carbon More Problems: Save Your Money, Keep Your Integrity

As I mentioned yesterday, at least one cycling website feels that a $1,000 power meter was the most exciting thing at Interbike, due largely to the fact that in the strange and anal retentive world of quantifying your own inadequacy $1,000 is considered cheap for a power meter. Well, part of the reason I was less than impressed is that I don't read Interbike coverage to see "cheap" stuff; I read it to see stuff that's so stupendously expensive that only the most delusional person would even consider paying half the full retail price. Fortunately, Reynolds has come to my rescue with a wheelset that costs $6,000, and if you don't believe a wheelset could possibly be worth $6,000 then perhaps the fact that Reynolds has actually purchased the URL "theworldslightestwheel.com" will convince you otherwise:


So what else are you paying for besides a website? Well, one thing you're paying for is carbon spokes, and unlike the spokes on the wheel you're probably "palping" these are under no tension. As Reynolds puts it, "No tension. No problem." That's certainly catchy, though I did have trouble wrapping my mind around their explanation:

Reynolds says their spokes are "attached...to the hub and the rim with no tension." Then it says, "This is important because, while carbon spokes perform well in tension, they are less reliable in compression." So if carbon spokes perform well in tension then why don't they use it? I don't know. Perhaps if I were smarter I would understand. Furthermore, I'd also understand why these wheels are worth $6,000. As it is, I guess it's my own ignorance that is preventing me from fully understanding and appreciating them. Sometimes it pays to be stupid.

But while I don't understand Reynolds's seemingly contradictory marketing copy, I certainly do understand why they're selling a wheelset with carbon spokes. Considering Mavic's explosive success with the R-Sys, how could they not? Furthermore, companies are clearly still experimenting with ways to make a reliable carbon spoke, and how could roadies and triathletes possibly resist spending thousands of dollars to be the Rhesus Monkeys in these experiments? Plus, Mavic may very well have found a solution to their self-destructing carbon spoke problem. No, they haven't actually fixed the wheel; rather, they've come up with a reassuring slogan:


I encountered this while reading Competitive Cyclist's Interbike report, which included some bold Mavic testing videos meant to reassure an understandably skeptical public. Here's one where they smash both a Ksyrium and an R-Sys:




"The wheel keeps its integrity" is clearly French for "All you haters suck my balls." However, I remain unconvinced. If you watch the way the Ksyrium wheel breaks, the spokes bend for awhile--actually, I'm not sure they even break at all. On the other hand, the spokes of the R-Sys snap immediately upon impact like pieces of Men's Pocky. As for the other videos, I'll concede that if your typical ride involves "intrusion tests" and simulated potholes then the R-Sys could very well be the wheel for you.

But while wheel manufacturers continue trying to crack the carbon spoke problem by figuring out how to make a carbon spoke that won't crack, the fixed-gear "culture" (which, of course, is now closed) still does its best to remain elusive and inscrutable to those unfortunate enough not to have gained access during the "open enrollment period" (which was roughly 2003 to 2009). For example, until recently it seemed fairly obvious that the correct way to lock a fixed-gear bicycle was the "Hipster High-Lock:"


However, this morning I happened to pass the very same bicycle in the very same place, only to find it locked at ground level:

Clearly, the fixed-gear culture realizes that outsiders are not only aware of the Hipster High-Lock, but are even employing it on geared bikes. As such, they're quite literally "taking it back to the streets" by dispensing the technique altogether. Either that, or it could be that the height at which fixed-gear riders lock their bikes is determined in the same way as the height at which government institutions fly their flags. Ordinarily, fixed-gear riders may fly their bikes high by locking them atop fences, trees, and lampposts. However, when a hipster tragedy takes place, perhaps they choose to fly them at half mast. I'm not sure what the reason would be for today's display, though it could have something to do with Roman Polanski's arrest.

It could also simply be that fixed-gear culture is mourning its own death. Some of you may recall a Craigslist conversion factory called 718 Cyclery, "curators" of such classics as the Bumblebee Bike. Well, I guess even Republic/Urban Outfitters cannot meet the demands of the masses the fixed-gear "culture" left behind, because judging from this Craigslist post it seems as though 718 Cyclery is thriving:


718 Cyclery Fixie Fixed Gear Bicycle Conversion Restoration Shop
Date: 2009-09-27, 7:51PM EDT
Reply to: [deleted]

www.718c.com

I own and operate an independent shop that converts new and vintage (i.e. "older") road frames from the 60's, 70's and 80's into modern bikes (commuters, fixies, 3 speed, etc), complete with all new components and a professional powder-coated finish. In addition to building my own projects, about half of what I do is build collaboratively with people who want to learn how to build. The atmosphere at my shop is free from arrogance and attitude. My bikes have been featured in Bust Magazine (http://www.718c.com/pressB.html) and I have great reviews on yelp when yelp decides to show all of my reviews (http://www.yelp.com/biz/718-cyclery-new-york)

We have a custom wheel building shop, and also have an exclusive relationship with The Mission Bicycle Company to use their frame in our builds

To book a free consultation/appointment/shop tour, go to my website and click the "Book Now" button on the right to access my online calendar.

Check out my website at (http://www.718c.com/), to see whats for sale, whats in progress, how our collaborative build program works and what we're all about.

I did visit 718 Cyclery's website to see what they're all about, and I feel like I've got a pretty good idea. However, I'm still not sure what part wood screws play in bicycle assembly or why you would align your truing stand's indicators with your spoke nipples:


Still, I was impressed to learn that 718 Cyclery's work has been featured in Bust magazine:

Of course, Bust published in its prestigious "One-Handed Read" series the now-classic fixed-gear flat-fix sex story, which features one of the most famous opening sentences in American letters:

And, as the Craigslist ad promises, 718 Cyclery are indeed reviewed on Yelp. In fact, they've got five stars:


I should add though that this rating is based on a single review:

"This joint, and, in particular, its owner Joe, has provided me with countless minutes of entertainment."

If Bumblebee Bikes, One-Handed Reads, and backhanded compliments are not enough to convince you to see 718 Cyclery for your next conversion, maybe it's because you're from "nonhipster Williamsburg:"

I was recently reading a New York Times article having nothing to do with cycling when I noticed the above qualification, and I find it amusing that Williamsburg has become so trendy that simply entering it is now a threat to one's "street cred." Personally, I think this sort of thing is unnecessary, and I'm sure most people understand that not all of Williamsburg has been hipsterified. Furthermore, simply entering Williamsburg does not necessarily mean one is a hipster or is conducting hipster business, just like simply entering a bathroom does not necessarily mean one has to urinate. Sure, if you entered Williamsburg on a 718 Cyclery fixed-gear conversion then the evidence is damning, but it's equally possible you entered it on a distinctly unhip shopping cart bike conversion:


I only hope this one has been properly tested:



All you haters suck my integrity.

158 comments:

ant1 said...

ant1st!

ant1 said...

oh yeah!

Anonymous said...

2yeaahharg

Letme Vipodium said...

Don't call it a comeback!

ant1 said...

damn I'm good.

speedwobble said...

ant1 is blood doping.

Letme Vipodium said...

If there's anybody I can't get mad at for pushing me off the podium it's good old ant1

Astroluc said...

ant... 2 wins in a row!

Luc7th?

Asterisk said...

CRAP CRBN

speedwobble said...

Letme.

Yeah, but you can give Ant1 the sideways "Lance sneer" for being upset.

speedwobble said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Top ten

M said...

Quite possibly the stupidest opinion piece of the year

http://network.nationalpost.com/np/blogs/toronto/archive/2009/09/29/time-to-stop-giving-bicylists-a-free-ride.aspx

(Yes you read correctly - tax cyclist 'cause they breathe more carbon dioxide more than drivers sitting in a car)

Anonymous said...

?

ken e. said...

snorkel first! rain issues...

bikesgonewild said...

...ant1 X several solid wins = festina ???...

...hey, hey, now...i'm just sayin'...

Anonymous said...

ant1, congratulations -- back to back.

Is it necessary for you to hog two additional places in the top ten?

Thank you?

ervgopwr said...

my computer wasn't admonishing me enough.

hillbilly said...

geez, ant1 is on fire! and by fire, i do mean, doping to the gills.

self-distructing?

ant1 said...

Hey, until CAS hears my case, I'm allowed to race as I please.

Letme Vipodium said...

Speaking of expensive things, I recently made a spinny hat out of an old Lew Pro VT-1 I found in a dumpster behind France

Anonymous said...

I think I'm going to have my nipples trued.

rezado said...

ALLYOUHATERSREADTHISPOWERMETER SUCKA

rezado said...

HTML IS BULLSHIT

Sprocketboy said...

Bust Magazine--somehow, I expected something different.

Anonymous said...

Maybe the solution is decentralizing cities to stop people from using vehicles? That'll make sure no one breaks the law! So long as you avoid person to person contact and stay in your house, everyone is safe right? ugh....can't stand the illogical stuff like this. Lemme ask my kids to stop riding their bikes since they're not 16 years old yet (only makes sense right? Since you're not allowed to drive until you're 16?)

Anonymous said...

Maybe the solution is decentralizing cities to stop people from using vehicles? That'll make sure no one breaks the law! So long as you avoid person to person contact and stay in your house, everyone is safe right? ugh....can't stand the illogical stuff like this. Lemme ask my kids to stop riding their bikes since they're not 16 years old yet (only makes sense right? Since you're not allowed to drive until you're 16?)

CommieCanuck said...

$6,000 for fragile wheels, ...outstanding. These use the same idea as Lightweights (also $6000).

Certainly tension is involved, but not statically. The tension comes when you are riding on a smooth road, you hit a pebble and hear a "crick", which is the sound of $6000 being flushed.

Oh, and the tension of riding in the rain on CF rims for the first time. This is the magic point in time where "Brake" and "Break" are intermixed.

CF wheels are the Rolex watches of the cycling world, douchebags only need apply.

Joe the Mercian said...

Also note that the "worlds lightest wheel" uses Sheldon Browns own "POWerwheels technology. In fact, they've taken it a step further: The rear wheel only has trailing spokes and radials. None of those pesky leading spokes which ACTUALLY PULL AGAINST YOU!

Though, since crabon fibre is so good in tension, one wonders why they didn't use trailing spokes, which would load them in the preferred compression loadway.

Anonymous said...

CART CONV

ANT1 SUXX

new orleans bankruptcy attorney said...

I guess I'm going to have to go spend $600 on a set of box wheels, but that is way more legitimate of an investment.

Ed Stockwell said...

Fity

Bad Lawyer said...

steel's real.

Strayhorn said...

Aw, the wood screws are in case a Calfee comes in the shop.

Commie Daffy said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless duck.

Anonymous said...

So, did Reynolds run their wheel past the Diminutive Frenchmen? I'm baffled by the lack of of DFU data on their 6000 dollar wheels. What gives?

ervgopwr said...

reynolds rider weight limit: 180lbs or about 3 DFU, maybe 2 after le fromage binge .

g said...

Am I the only one that wants some friction in a 'fuck'? Otherwise, it's the old 'hot dog down the hallway'. AYHFMF

Reed Enwright said...

SHPN CART

Anonymous said...

Mavic need the Sheldon Brown POWerwheels "Lifetime Guarantee" on their wheels - *Guaranteed for the life of the wheel, or two weeks, whichever comes first. This guarantee shall be void if the purchaser uses tires, tubes, rim tapes or valve caps or other accessories not expressly approved for use with POWerwheels, nor will it apply to any wheels which have been subject to on-road or off-road use. Void where prohibited, prohibited where void, keep away from children and animals, use only with adequate ventilation.

sufferist said...

Mr. Snob: please change the following

from:
self-distructing carbon spoke

to:
self-destructing carbon spoke

Thank you

Chris said...

This is one of those rare times I feel fortunate to be well over 180lbs. Gosh darn it I'd love me some $6000 carbon wheels but they have a weight limit I'm never going to reach in my lifetime. Unless I use the wheels break them and grind off both arms and a leg! Brilliant
I also like the website mentioning that computer models show spokes in compression for 1/3rd of a revolution, with no mention of actually finding this true in the real world. I guess computers are as infallible as the internets that they run.

bikesgonewild said...

...if you're a married man & you spend $6000 bucks on "the worlds lightest wheelset", be forewarned:- there will be plenty of tension involved in your new carbon "footprint"...

...the good news is now ya only need a $1000 bucks more for that power meter ya also think ya need...

...7g's total X 6.753sec improvement at local 10 mile tt + family tension = "oh ya man...i really feel i'm getting where i need to be at on the bike"...

...speaks for itself...

Dominic said...

I can't wait to see the images from the radical, bone destroying $6000 wheel failures that are arguably inevitable. Preemptive list of causes: wrong tire size and/or tread pattern, overweight or underweight rider, turning the wrong way on it, riding on an incline, frame incompatibilities, "they were really just wheels for show to begin with," etc.

sufferist said...

BGW: if I spend 70K on the wheels and monitors, that's more than a whole minute that I get over those poor saps with their wives and children and love and such. I'm checking on my Visa limit as I type. (It's difficult, but doable....)

VaticDart said...

$6000 for a 180 lb weight limit - I could carry groceries home but not with my orangoutang Bumstead on my shoulders. What's he supposed to do, walk?

sufferist said...

vaticdart: he needs his own set of simian approved crabon bike and wheels...sheesh...don't people know how to take care of their pets anymore?

M said...

It is confusing seeing these high-end components - is Merckx's advice on how to improve as a cyclist all of a sudden incorrect? I thought I just had to "ride, ride, ride", no? I guess we're in the age of tech aesthetics above love for the sport.

CommieCanuck said...

Vaticdart, you need to be responsible and put that orangutan on a diet.

Anonymous said...

I have been racing on Reynolds Carbon Wheels all season, love em. Can't stretch $6000 worth though. Look for them on that new tri geek squad, Team Rhesus!

Anonymous said...

FRIC TION

Anonymous said...

HotD Hlwy

Darren Stuart Embry said...

NTEG RITY

Anonymous said...

Mr. Canuck @ 1:46 p.m. ---

You can order Rolex bicycle wheels here also:

http://www.roleximpex.com/tyres.html

bikesgonewild said...

...sufferist...

..."wives and children and love and such."...ehhh, all that shit's obviously overrated...especially in comparison to a great bike...

..."wives ???" - speaks for itself (themselves)...hell, look at the divorce rate...

..."children ???" - i was a child once...need i say more...

..."love ???" - love can be bought & even the "good stuff" is cheaper than a new $6000 wheelset...

..."such ???" - not quite sure what "such" is but i'll bet it's overrated also...

...hey, jaded but just sayin'...

Anonymous said...

I can spin a Walmart wheel on a stand and stick a broomstick in the spokes and...

The wheel keeps its integrity

Let's try that with the momentum of a 160lb cyclist and see if the Mavic wheel doesn't explode. Mavic's testing looks like it's being done by a couple of shop mechanics when they really need trained ENGINEERS.

They seem to really believe in the DFU.

kale said...

I can only imagine how much higher up I could lock my bike outside the patisserie with that wheelway.

mikeweb said...

ant1, Dr. Ferrari called, he wants your soul now.

Lefa said...

High-Lock.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Sufferist,

Sorry, I got confused--I heard Mavic is working on a self-distrusting wheelset too.

--RTMS

sufferist said...

BGW: you may be confusing love ( emotional, psychological and spiritual intimacy) with the raw visceral experience of a physical interface. While the two are not mutually exclusive, they are not substitutable exchanges for each other.

I hope this helps....

youaretheengine said...

From now on, I'm spending $6000 on everything.

Anonymous said...

6grd heel

Cadel Evans said...

Bust magazine was about to do a feature on my career. NOT ANYMORE!

kale said...

Harumph,

My shopping cart is made from carbon nanotube frame technology, seamlessly integrated into meticulously crafted lugs, with English leather handlebar tape.

Yeah, it can only hold a few bags of Utz, but the ladies love that shit.

g said...

I came across this sentence and cannot wait to see if it makes its way into this blog's contents:
"The organization change reflects Fallbrook’s growth as a customer-facing manufacturing and sales organization as the global acceptance and market share of its NuVinci continuously variable planetary (CVP) technology accelerates."
I have no idea what it means, but it seems laterally stiff and vertically compliant, right? I also think it has something to do with bikes.

Brian said...

BSNYC,

You touched ever so lightly on the subject of 'conducting hipster business'. I would love to get a better insight on this enigmatic carrer path. Besides the obvious making of hummus, jamming out to French music, and playing folk instruments.

PCKY ADCT

leroy said...

Dear BSNYC --

My cousin Swifty, whom my Aunt tells me is a "very big Agent" in something called "The Business," asked me to forward the following message.

"We just signed on to promote your helper monkey Vito. The kid is gonna be huge. He's gonna make King Kong look like Cadel what's his name. As such, Vito is a "no can do" for further testing of carbon spoke wheel sets unless you're offering dental. And a subscription to Bust
Magazine for his trailer."

World't Lightest Wheel said...

I know it's the same guy, but it still looks like a contradiction.

http://www.lewracing.com/provt1TUBULAR.html

How can the RZR be the lightest if the Pro (or should i say PRO, no Competitive Cyclist doesn't sell Lew) VT-1 is lighter?

Anonymous said...

Brian

The more yall know:

A

b

Stump said...

that video of sledgehammering wheels is the same thing i did for my 6th grade science fair experiment. i'm still not sure i understand what the dudes dryhumping the wheels had to do with the wheel maintaining its integrity after a sledgehammer destroyed it. perhaps i have no integrity.

CommieCanuck said...

All those sick of internet talk about "hipsters" raise their hands.

Seriously, enough already. All this internet traffic about hipsters is stealing bandwidth from the true purpose of the internet: high definition man-goat porn, HDMGP.

g said...

cc, your HDMGP link isn't working.

Brian said...

@anon 3:28,

Thank you.

CommieCanuck,

No worries. I'm moving on to the latest problem we have to deal with...keester bombs.

EdTheRed said...

What the hell is "carbon"? Is it anything like the mighty crabon?

Suzee said...

Re: Real Wheel Integrity

A non-crabon spoked wheel when confronted by a brute of hammer, such as the lump used in the sequestered test, would no doubt start squealing like a 'Bust' writer denied a 'frictionless fuck'. And as such, I'm sure you will all agree, any integrity just flies out the window.

Joseph Nocella said...

Nipple truing, you mean you've never?

You know, yelp really pisses me off. I have over 20 5-star reviews yet their algorithm which is supposed to detect fraudulent reviews suppresses all of them and leaves that joker's review up there.

Joe, 718c

NatMc said...

snobbers, i don't know what you're getting all bent out of shape over regarding those reynolds carbon spokes. i mean, "computer modeling shows that a non-tensioned rim is supported through all 360 degrees of a wheel's rotation."

put your worries to bed, the computer says it's all good.

libertyonbikes! said...

or you could spend $3000 on some good liposuction and get the same on bike results as a fast set of wheels.

keep the other three grand in case chicks STILL don't dig you,
you can always buy some love.

silly dentist

Anonymous said...

Speaking of 'frictionless fuck's...Whatever happened to Frilly?

Anonymous said...

'Reynolds composites studios designeds starteds withs a blanks sheet of paper to creates the lightestests, strongests, mosts responsible Bicycles Wheel on the planet'

Origami?

belmont sledgehammer said...

That shopping cart conversion is wonderful. As are the "sub 900 gram" wheels. And so I'd like to see if I could get the good folks at the 718 shop to build me up a nice light weight carbon-wheeled cart.

NatMc said...

whoa, hold on a sec. i thought friction was the whole point.

libertyonbikes! said...

and if you only have $600?

grow a beard
buy some girls jeans (no matter your weight)
dig up an old t from jr high
find a $60 beater bike,
pay $300 to convert it to a fixed,
throw some cheap beer in your $200 custom handmade bag
(and fix that ID so you're 22,
not 42)
and you're good to go!

Anonymous said...

meh

Anonymous said...

what is that guy loading the wheels with his hands trying to prove? How stupid must one be to think "Integrity" is proven by that stupid monkey trick? Mavic's new products division needs to be cleared out! Get rid of these jackasses who are trying to convince Mavic that crabon fiber is the solution to every problem.

Adam said...

Why did you change your feed settings to provide only a truncated version of the post? That sucks.

Partental Advisory said...

Mavic, you should sell the the way the R-SYS spokes behave as a SAFETY FEATURE, like the CF F1 crumple zones.

Give it a an acronym, like Safe Nice And Pricey.

bob the builder said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless truck.

Cal the corn cob said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless shuck.

Wayne Gretzky said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless puck.

Bambi said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless buck.

Rabbi Rabinowicz said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless shmuck.

M. Muthafo said...

NYC culture is constipated and BikeSnob is the enema.

Tom the Tool guy said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless Chuck.

Tom the gay guy said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless Chuck.

Anonymous said...

What is crabon? Is it carbon spelt wrong? ~And wehat does RTMS mean plkease?

Thanks

x

CommieCanuck said...

Crabon is aluminum spelled wrong. that wehat that means.

Pete the fowl plucker said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless duck.

Wes said...

Long time no be here. 100.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to be a prick, but I feel compelled to point out that the sentence: "Sure, if you entered Williamsburg on a 718 Cyclery fixed-gear conversion than the evidence is damning," is an if-then statement, and therefore shouldn't use "than." Otherwise funny as usual.

Chewbacca said...

Umm... You spelled crabon wring in the title if this piece.

ant1 said...

Prick - nice catch!

Henny Goodman said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless yuck.

The Iron Chef said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless wok.

Alan Shephard said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless flock.

Let's light this candle.

Anonymous said...

I wish you'd bash inline skaters some more. i enjoyed that.

Fatima Whitbread said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless chuck.

C Gull said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless muck.

Bad Lawyer said...

BS, if you haven't read it already, Ben Ratliff in reviewing Marianne Faithful had some germane remarks about the fate of hipsters in today's NYT.

Busta said...

you should try my index finger operated mixed-gear, for luck.

Martin Johnson said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless ruck.

Miles Archer said...

Yes, why change the RSS feed?

And this damn hotel i'm staying in blocks all videos. Hmm I wonder why.

Commie said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless canuck.

Mr Dyson said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless suck.

Billy Bunter said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless tuck.

Anonymous said...

I will not buy this record, it is scratched.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Miles Archer,

There were some problems with the RSS feed (it was not updating at all) and abbreviating it was a quick fix. At some point hopefully Vito the Helper Monkey and I can figure out the problem.

--BSNYC

Amomynous said...

Miles

Get off your high horse. We can't all be comp nerds. It's not like the poor guy is getting any money out of this or writing a book or anything. He's just an amateur like you or someone else (not me obviously - I'm a proffesional).

Anonymous said...

un post muy bueno /chas gracias

Ray Babbitt said...

the uci safety test is applied directly inline with a spoke, whereas the pothole test is applied between two spokes.

I wonder how the spokes fare if the pothole test is applied inline?

the intrusion test is applied quite close to the center of the wheel. the "ground" stops moving quite quickly. In the real world (imagine a rear wheel) wouldnt it skid quite a long way? It indicates to me that either the testing machine switches off at the moment of impact or thereabouts, or the load applied is not similar to a rider.

quite crude testing methods. There is not continuity between the integrity tests either. one wheel he puches down on the tire, the other on the hub.

It's not april (or wednesday), is it?

Flopsie the Rabbit said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless buck

Jonathan Pervert Seagull said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless rook

The Bard said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless Puck

Anonymous said...

Thanks.

yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo said...

knucklucksnuckpluckyuckupchuckcluckstruckfuckfuckfuckfuckshutthefuckup

Fred said...

My poor handling skills are not limited to bicycles. I once spent 3 days in the hospital following an unfortunate shopping cart incident. Let's just say the cart had a fixed wheel and no breaks...

*sigh*

speedwobble said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless fingerbang.
that's it, i just made myself uncomfortable.

Yours Sincerely, Disgusted. said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless yuk.

kfg said...

@g 3:12

It means:

"The problem with cone and ball friction drives is that they weigh a fuckton. That's why they have, until now, largely been restricted to stationary industrial purposes, but we put our best minds to work on the problem and feel the marketing department has resolved the issue."

SLIPPERYDICK said...

I enjoy the sleek locomotion of my fixed-gear like I enjoy a smooth frictionless teflon-coated perpetual motion machine.

All you haters slide effortlessly off my balls.

kfg said...

P.S.

"We're working on a frictionless fuckton big, steel balls drive for maintaining hipster integrity. We're going to call it the "Ünfixed Gear" and market it as Cushman upgrade."

Astroluc said...

FRIK SHUN

FRKS HNFK

WELL OOBD

WELL LUBD

BRKN WEEL

RSYS 4EVA

MildT said...

Man, I love Pocky!

ken e. said...

here i was thinking some hot-button topic had set some-one off...

g-roc said...

"taking it back to the streets"

Classic Bike Snob.

bikesgonewild said...

...sufferist...

...it's true...were you to look at my road, cyclo-cross & one speed town bike, the initial impression you would undoubtedly have is "my god...it's clear that bikesgonewild gets to share a raw visceral experience through his physical interface w/ these amazing machines"...

...but...

...upon closer observation of the love lavished upon these wonderfully efficient machines through both componentry & exquisite colorways, you'd undoubtedly come to the one obvious conclusion..."why, it's palpably astounding how bikesgonewild has transcended the realm of the purely physical to precipitate an emotional, psychological and spiritual intimacy w/ what was once simply rubber, titanium, steel, scandium & crabon"...

...i hope my just sayin' helps....

spanish mike said...

bikesgonewild

give uz a brake and do something elz for a change

chinga2madre

just saying

bikesgonewild said...

...gee, dude...i musta missed the bsnyc/rtms blogsite memo that specifies i'm supposed to be accommodating you...

..."chinga2madre"...ahhh...how about you go do the same...

...just fucking sayin'...

kfg said...

Jeeeeeezum Crow. Chill out, Dudes. We like our fuckin' sayin' frictionless around here.

Anonymous said...

Integrity:

2. The state of being whole, entire, or undiminished.
3. a sound, unimpaired, or perfect condition.

Anonymous said...

For your... consideration?

http://www.behance.net/Gallery/eco--07/293563

Daniel said...

http://infiniteprose.wordpress.com/2009/09/30/will-comodi-che-cation-never-end/

ervgopwr said...

Wednesday!

Jeff P. said...

has no one noticed that when he tests the, "integrity," of the kysrium he does it by pushing on the the top of the rim itself whereas when he tests the R-sys he does so by pushing down on the ends of the axle?

There is an absolutely enormous difference in how each of those wheels is being loaded in their post hammer-smashy-thing test (to use the technical nomenclature). How about some equal testing standards between the competition and your own product?

frilly said...

Hey anon 4:12, I'm still here & still a fan of all things frictionless. Ditched work early yesterday to get in a ride before dark.

Anonymous said...

This place serves Bukkake for lunch!

Treat your lady friend.

thealphastate said...

Hipsters would be flying their bikes at half-staff, not half-mast. Staffs are on land, masts are on ships.

chan said...

this blog makes me chuckle. often. thank you for your snobby wit.

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