Friday, December 5, 2008

Extra-Ordinary: From Publicity to P-Fars

A number of people have pointed out that I received a favorable mention on Lance Armstrong's Twitter. (Or, as he's referred to by non-cycling Americans, "The guy from all the bike riding.")

While I appreciated the nod, I'm also the sort of person who can extract negativity from anything. (Hand me a suitcase full of money and I'll complain about how heavy it is. "You expect me to schlep this all the way to the bank?!?") If you're unfamiliar with Twitter, it only allows for entries of 140 letters or less, so it strikes me as odd that, with words at such a premium, Armstrong should still feel the need to squander them with use of the word "Maybe." Also, after he mentioned me, I checked back and was dismayed to find this:

If Armstrong can't even tell a serious site from a comedic one, does it really mean anything that he thinks mine is funny? Talk about damning with faint praise! Sure, Rapha did kill with that "tweed softshell" bit, but still.

Even so, this didn't prevent me from enjoying his Twitter feed. It's rare that you get so much insight into the life of a public figure, and he should be applauded for his candor. I mean, he even tells you when the drug testers come--which is pretty often. Actually, at this point Armstrong just urinates involuntarily whenever the doorbell rings. (It's a great way to embarrass him at parties.) I was also surprised at how similar his life is to mine, as you can see from this entry:


"Getting a massage from Ryszard (my longtime Polish soigneur) listening to Sufjan Stevens."

That is so wild! I also have a longtime Polish soigneur, and I totally crank up the Sufjan when he massages me. (My soigneur's name is Thadeusz, though. He has the hands of an angel--or at least the hands of an angel who has Hormel hams for hands.) Get out of my head, Armstrong. Get out of my head!

Moving on, yesterday's post included a photo of Madonna on a road bike like 20 years ago, and since then speculation as to the identity of her training partner has run rampant. (And by "run rampant" I of course mean that one or two people wondered who it is.) Well, one reader in Canada (or "Canadia" if you prefer) postulates that it may be none other than "Canadian Track Great Curt Harnett," based on this revealing photo:


Well, the hair is certainly a match, and the reader points out that both riders are sporting Canadian national team colors on their shorts, but the cyclist with Madonna has the spindly legs of a pure climber and not the bulky legs of a trackie. I guess we may never know. Then again, that photo is pretty old, so if by some chance they spawned it may be worth watching the velodromes of the Great White North for any up-and-coming track racers with a penchant for both mullets and g-strings.

But as much as I'd like to avoid reality by obsessing over the sexual dalliances of celebrities, the fact is there are much more serious matters in the world of cycling that need to be addressed, and I for one cannot in good conscience sit idly by. I received a shocking email recently in which a reader told a tragic tale of arriving at a bike rack designed to accommodate multiple bikes, only to find that a greedy rider had taken up the whole thing with one single wretched Huffy:

I've taking the liberty of annotating the reader's photo, in which irony abounds. We've often seen expensive bikes locked up poorly, yet here is a bicycle that arguably nobody in his or her right mind would covet that has been secured with two U-locks. The rider has even made sure to lock up both wheels, much to the chagrin of anybody looking for a steel-rimmed Schraeder valve wheelset with a gigantic pie plate. I'm guessing the only reason the highly-desireable comfort saddle isn't locked up too is that the seatpost became permanently stuck in the frame way back when Madonna used to ride (with) Curt Harnett.

So I'd just like to take this opportunity to say that we, as a community of cyclists, should not tolerate the craven act of bike rack-hogging. (Or bike rock-hagging, which is what Curt Harnett was doing with Madonna.) Nor should we tolerate the stupid act of failing to lock your bike altogether:

And, perhaps most importantly, we need to take a strong stand against leaving frame size stickers on seat tubes. This is the bicycle equivalent of letting the tag stick up out of the collar of your t-shirt. Nobody cares what size your BILF t-shirt is, and nobody cares what size bike you ride. This particular example is especially disconcerting, because the rider has actually gone throught the trouble of adding additional stickers, yet still couldn't even be bothered to remove the size sticker. And that's like standing there with your fly open and straightening your tie.

But there is some justice in the world, as evidenced by the apprehension of Dustin Dunlavy, the idiot who's all touchy about lights. One intrepid reader even went so far as to unearth Dunlavy's results from a few dorkathlons:


Rumor has it that Dunlavy has already been approached by Michael Ball, who has apparently offered him a spot on Rock Racing's 2009 roster. Ball wouldn't confirm or deny this, though he did acknowledge that "Dunlavy has the agressive attitude and the extensive palmolives we look for in a rider." I would have pressed him further, but the egg timer he uses to limit the duration of his interviews popped and that was that.

Finally, the p-far trend has officially moved into its "being sold at exorbitant prices on Craigslist" phase, as you can see from this listing:


1888 Columbia High Wheel Penny Farthing Bicycle - Original Condition - $8000 (carlsbad)

Reply to: [deleted]

Date: 2008-12-04, 1:50PM PST

1888 Columbia Light Roadster Highwheel high wheel penny farthing bicycle. Original paint and nickel plating. 52" front wheel diameter. Museum quality but is also ready to ride. 760-473-[deleted] carlsbad, california

I'll be the first to admit that this p-far is mad old-timey, yo, but I still think the $8,000 price tag is excessive--especially since it probably retailed for nineteen cents back in 1888. Still, it's a fine ride, and it even appears to have an integrated headset. (At least I don't see any headset cups.) Personally, the first thing I'd do is remove the brake, which is that thing on the front that looks like a shoehorn. I wouldn't want some gentleman to question my mettle, lest I be forced to challenge him to a duel. (In which case I'd slap him with my Knog love/hate glove.)

If your tastes run more toward the modern, you doubtless covet this new-school ride, spotted by a reader in Des Moines:



I'm especially "feeling" the lantern on the front. If Dustin Dunlavy had had a light like that, the whole unfortunate incident would have been averted. Also, if Knog Frogs are hipster cysts, then this bike has a serious case of "dandy rheumatism."

But as trendy as the old-fashioned rides are, it's important to keep looking towards the future. And no company is more forward-looking than BMC. One reader even forwarded me this photo of a BMC p-far prototype:

Now that's a chick magnet.

Ride safe this weekend,

--BSNYC/RTMS

184 comments:

Anonymous said...

Toppermost of the poppermost

ant1 said...

ant1st!

ant1 said...

Damn, I'm on a roll this week. Must be that new fixie I got.

Mark said...

Podium Ho!

Anonymous said...

up there

Mark said...

Shouldn't a double post on podium count as only one comment? How can you come in second and third?

red neckerson said...

yup top ten

streepo said...

prize twat!!!

Anonymous said...

JV Sideburns

Top Ten...?

Anonymous said...

top tenner

red neckerson said...

last night me and my friends jimmy bob joe bob billy bob and ricky rode around shooting them damm inflatable santas with our bb guns and billy bob told ricky that he was going to gut and field dress rodulf the red assed raindeer and ricky laughed so hard that he pooped on hisself i aint lying it was that funny

Bill said...

11, that's like 2 first place finishes

AH said...

Looks like Dunlavy's 5k race pace is only 9min/mi. You'd think a guy full of that much piss and vinegar would be able to run faster.

That's pretty meh for a 28yr-old.

Brendan said...

On Twitter, it's 140 letters, not words. 140 words is a lot of words!

Anonymous said...

almost podium. top 20 is good for me.

Anonymous said...

TWIT TARD

gilmour1 said...

I just cancelled my full winter wardrobe from Rapha, and pre-ordered the BMC P-Far. There were only 11 people ahead of me...

BikeSnobNYC said...

Brendan,

Right--thanks.

--BSNYC

Daniel said...

I'm proud that my bmc p-far spy shot is already getting some heat on it.

Excuse me while I got sign up for twitter and twitter about the spy shot and signing up for twitter to twitter about the whole experience.

wait what?

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure what's worse; getting beat up by a trigeek or getting majorly girled and having it recorded on the internet.

27min 5K, was he walking backwards?

monty mn

Critical Ass said...

Des Moines has steampunk hipsters? Who knew!

I grew up in the much less sophisticated city of Cedar Rapids where pie plates and suicide levers will never be ironic...just a post-DUI badge of honor.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Isn't Sufjan Stevens that guy who's photo was on here a while back wearing half of a bowling ball as a helmet?

ant1 said...

Mark, my second comment (third overall) is outside the realm of podium comments. It was merely a metacomment commenting on my week's worth of comments, which have been commendable. comment.

ANT1 RULZ

wishiwasmerckx said...

And on the international front, Canada's newly-elected prime minister has dissolved Parliament. Hoardes of angry protesters have formed an orderly queue on the sidewalk. Wasn't that our very own Commiecanuck front-and-center in the BBC Canada feed?

Anonymous said...

I'd like to see a seal of disapproval stiker on Lance's tour bike this year.

-long live cylostan

ryanfromdeland said...

yabai orlando!

Sticker Stymied said...

My problem with stickers on bikes is that my bikes tends to be where scrubby things are not, so I spend about 15 seconds picking at the sticker with my fingernail and then give up. I repeat this about every three months. My main bike still has the seat tube AND "read the manual" sticker on it after a year and a half. Should I feel ashamed? Maybe, but I don't.

Anonymous said...

Must see Pic of Dustin Dunlavy here:

http://tinyurl.com/5kszmq

Dewey McSloshington said...

"I grew up in the much less sophisticated city of Cedar Rapids where pie plates and suicide levers will never be ironic...just a post-DUI badge of honor."

Werd.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Nobody cares what size your BILF T-shirt is, that is so long as your panties match in color, and you have no compulsion against publicly displaying them in all thier color-coordinated glory.

Mister Grammar said...

I never saw an answer to the question about bubuska versus bubusha, but I have another:

Wouldn't a sentence ending in "...sit idly by." be guilty of ending in a preposition? If not why not, and if so, how could this be bettered?

Thank you. And I know Snob thanks you too, as I know he is a concerned, even fastidious, writer and grammarian (grammatician?), as anyone who writes for a living and puts out his blog on his lunch break and then obsessively checks the comments for grammar corrections would be.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Mister Grammar,

I think it's healthy to break grammatical rules every so often.

--BSNYC

DUSTIN' DEE said...

prices on Craigslist" phase, as you can see from this listing:

OMMFGDMF! The link URL for the craigslist posting is the same as the previous link!

EGADS! Have you started taking smoking breaks on Fridays now, BikeSnob?

Alec said...

Emm as a follower for a while of both the bikesnob blog and the lance twitter I was surprised to see them both come together in such away by clicking a link back on my own blog...very strange indeed.

Yes Rapha...I have a Rapha top myself but I think if I got that jacket for cycling my girlfriend would throw me out the house!

Great reading :)

Russ said...

I always try and end my sentences with a premonition—NO, IT CAN'T BE!

leroy said...

Whoa! Lance and I have something in common!

I too urinate frequently for no good reason.

And here I thought I was just getting old.

Thank you BSNYC, you've made my day.

bk jimmy said...

I think I solved the mystery of how Lance can afford to race for free:

Armstrong's newest hometown business venture.

leroy said...

Mr. Grammar --

Re your observation concerning the placement of prepositions:

I am reminded of the time Mr. Red Neckerson approached a snooty sales clerk at Dillard's and inquired "can y'all tell me where the fishing gear is at?"

The clerk responded with his own inquiry: "Do you always end your sentences with prepositions?"

Of course, Mr. Neckerson's reply is well known:

"Well, 'scuse me, can y'all tell me where the fishing gear is at, butt-head?"

Strunk & White couldn't have put it better.

As everyone knows, the Elements of Style presupposes one has style to begin with.

Cool The Kid said...

We live in an era of bubbles, and my gut tells me BSNY is cashing in on the pennyfarthing bubble for sure...

"why look at this ridiculous posting for a p-farth in Brooklyn... $8,000? it does have all Campi components though... and can be bought by contacting the owner at bsnyponzi@g-mail.com"

Shame on you... and the midwesterner who will show up on Bedford Av, less $7500, but garnering the attention not even a tall biker could... for a day

kale said...

Please BMC the pfar needs to be brought into the 21st century with a Rohloff in the front.

What will the Time Machine be renamed to?

kale said...

Aww... Dustin Dunlavy has a prison pussy already. How nice for his cellmates.

Mister Grammar said...

leroy:

"As everyone knows, the Elements of Style presupposes one has style to begin with."

tsk, tsk.

Snob: I'm horrified. Not because you advocate breaking my rules, but because it took you five minutes to respond. I thought your boss was "cool" with taking time out for your blog...?

gilmour1 said...

Olde-time machine?

Eeberleeber said...

Three cheers to whoever's responsable for the BMC PF. Great post!

grammer nazi said...

Kale, "To what will the time machine be renamed?" Jeez, try to keep up with the other comments.

Jim said...

I am so not buying a penny farthing. Unless I can get a vintage one from the 1880s. In an original carbon fiber frame, with a Hed front wheel. And bullhorns.

I'm sure I'll be able to find something like this on the local Craigslist, and at a cracker of a price.

Retro is cool and all but I'm only willing to compromise so far when it comes to style points.

Critical Ass said...

Looks like Dustin Dunlavy may just be an alias for Dustin Diamond. If you ever saw him on Celebrity Fit Club, that would explain the 9-minute splits.

leroy said...

Mr. Grammar --

Tsk, tsk, you admonish?

Hmmmmph.

This is an indignity up with which one should not put.

kale said...

Never have I forsook grammar, but heretofore I was incognizant that Nazis were on their side. How droll.

Anonymous said...

Does your longtime Polish soigneur have a weary Portuguese friend?

Ted said...

I read Videodrome inspired as opposed to velodrome inspired, which may be the basis for my next bike.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 3:09pm,

Absolutely--one of the weariest I've seen.

--RTMS

wishiwasmerckx said...

Sufjan and the Weary Portugese would make a great name for a rock band, don't you think?

Anonymous said...

An authentic BMC PFar would be equipped with a spoon brake.

Daddo said...

i am now more convinced than ever that dustin and his biatch stole those bikes

dmitri fofonov said...

Babushka means either grandmother or scarf that grandmother is to wear.

Babushka not means stupid looking head cover marketed by American capitalists to silly socialist cyclist.

bikesgonewild said...

...wishiwasmerckx...didn't 'sufjan & the weary portugese' do the music for the "let's do the fork in the garbage disposal" video ???...

...& lance, buddy...no wonder you fucked an 'olsen twin'...this twitter thingy has got you tweakin', dude...yer fast becoming the ryan seacrest of the pro peleton...

...hopefully when the season starts you'll do yer talkin' w/ yer legs & not yer thumbs...i'd hate to see ya on 'versus' coverage sayin' "johan, pass me up my 'berry in the feed zone...i wanna text my homies some groovy new thoughts"...
...just sayin'...

Dusty Dunlavy said...

All you haters suck my bail

Anonymous said...

Daniel - sweet BMC spy shot.

Kudos, sir. Kudos.

Anonymous said...

Don't miss the video on the WKOW site.

I guess any red TT bike is the same as the next at to for...

genersal lsmenedd said...

wisco

Tex said...

Man, that Dustin Douchebag looks like a meth-head.

Anonymous said...

KURT!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-xxC_qImd0&eurl=

RatherBeBiking said...

@bikesgonewild

At least he's not scared to use periods in his sentences.

bikesgonewild said...

...& yah...total props on the bmc p-far proto...i heard the model name will actually be called the "chick magnet"...
...prescient, bsnyc/rtms, as always...

...& i'm bettin' astana is wishin' they still had those "high precision" swiss-made bikes under 'em now instead of just plain old wisconsin work bikes...

Judi said...

bgw - you think lance reads the comments? i doubt it.

bsny - way too cool lance is reading this blog - yahoo.

bikesgonewild said...

...ratherbebiking...well, there is that...

...& really, you can sense my grammatical fear, huh ???...

RatherBeBiking said...

bikesgonewild,

Well, maybe not, but Lance had sex with the Olsen girl long before he was on twitter. So it's unlikely that his 'tweakin' in that situation was a result of his twitter use.

Just sayin'.

Matt! said...

Is that a California sticker on that unlocked bike? Oh man. California always looks so bad on this blog. I was going to say, 'Why do you always make CA look bad?' Then I realized that I already knew the answer.

bikesgonewild said...

...sheesh...i guess if i have a point, it would be that the lance-ster's actions since the "first" retirement have looked like something out a' the micheal ball "rock 'em, sock 'em republic" camp...

...truth is i'm still a fan of ol' juan pelota...

Lance's Twitter said...

"...oh, I wish Matthew McConaughey would call, Getting a massage from Ryszard while listening to Sufjan Stevens is just not the same..."

"...don't give out my number to Mary Kate, if that skank's knocked up, it wasn't me, Francis isn't up to it"

"...eating lunch with a guy who never heard of cancer, the work seems endless..."

bikesgonewild said...

...thank you, lance's twitter...you made my point better than moi...

Bluenoser said...

Well Snob I'm glad to see I'm not the only guy from Canadia riding a Mullet.

GF Mullet that is.

-B

bk jimmy said...

On account of today's post I'm compelled to make my confession of being a dumby:

A couple weeks ago I stepped out of the office mid-morning to get coffee and noticed that while I had dutifully locked my bike's seat and back wheel to the frame (with my flimsy cable lock--a formality, really), the U-lock was still nestled in it's holster, and the bike was just leaning against the pole. Fortunately bike thieves seem to be scarce in this part of midtown, and the ones that are lurking must not have the dedication to carry away or clip the cable on an old boat anchor like my commuter.

Maybe somebody can clarify: is forgetting to lock up more pathetic than attempting to lock the bike but missing?

kale said...

Guess what the new top tube pad is in Crazyburg?

Props on rocking that sick saddle.

ant1 said...

BK Jimmy - It's the thought that counts.

John said...

75th anniversary of the repeal of Prohibition!! Why am still at work?

Daniel said...

@Anon 3:58:

I plan on providing spy shots of as many prototypes as I can lay my hands on.

dwight moody said...

The BMC P-Far has integrated shifters? What transmission system is it running?

Anonymous said...

If I happen to come across a cyclist wearing anything "Rapha" I will kick them in the ass and take their "Rapha" garbage from them and give it to the neighborhood cats for bedding.

Tex said...

@Anon 6:56

Get a light!

Er, I mean lighten up! All this hostility helps no one.

kale said...

Tex & Anon 3:56-

Get a light(weight softshell)!

Now, I'd probably condone twisting someone's head if they said that. Just wearing one is pretentious, but don't go all PDX on people because they're an prick.

Anonymous said...

"O'Brien said the attacker kneed him in the ribs and the man and his companion took off, tossing the bicycle light to the ground."

Clearly, they were afraid of contracting hipster cyst.

Joe D said...

Here's a pennyfarthing at a much more reasonable price: http://austin.craigslist.org/bik/945425410.html

Anonymous said...

Curt Harnett? You mean Kirk Hammett?

Anonymous said...

That "lantern" on the front of the bike near the end looks more like a carbide lamp, as used for mining, etc. They're actually pretty bright, and would most likely make a decent, if somewhat maintenance-intensive light.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carbide_lamp

Anonymous said...

so, is BMC going to offer a P-Far 'CX bike soon? I SOOO want to mount/remount/shoulder that biatch . . .

Anonymous said...

what a bunch of retard!!! driving around shooting at inflatable Christmas decorations earns you "idiot of the century" award

Anonymous said...

come on!!! what tool leaves retard stickers on their pride and joy...unless your bicycle is not your pride and joy and you couldn't give a shit what it says about you. I see stupid stickers on bikes it tells me your not a serious cyclist..just a fad cyclist

Anonymous said...

I tell cyclist riding at night without a light to get a light...usually I say it this way "Get a light you stupid dipshit mutha'f'er" and yes I'm ready to go rounds if they don't like my advice

Anonymous said...

just had a sweet earthquake here in SoCal

Anonymous said...

Anon 11:12 - you're joking right? What tool walks around judging who's serious and who's not? (Ok, other than Snobbie)

Philip Williamson said...

Shooting inflatable Santas and painting penises on Baby Jesii are pretty much the only things to do around here at Chrismastime.
It's a shame if Lance Armstrong doesn't read the comments. Fifty percent of the time, 20% of the comments are funnier than the post. For example "...eating lunch with a guy who never heard of cancer, the work seems endless..."

Anonymous said...

If Armstrong thinks Rapha is as funny as BikeSnobNYC, he's a rock star in my book. I'm glad I'm not the only one who laughs at Rapha.

BikeSnobNYC is humor.

Rapha is that same humor turned into sad consumerism. The joke is on the customer...

BikeSnob is the comedian on the corner. Rapha is the man swiping your wallet while you laugh at the man on the corner.

Courtney said...

I like the STI levers on the "modern P-far" Can I get that with dura ace stamped all over it so i can show off the first working dura ace gear set (direct drive)?

Bill said...

there sure are a lot of unfunny anonymous posters on here this time, is that due to 'the armstrong bump'?

red neckerson said...

hey anonymous 1104 we dont ride around we bike around we all dress in black and dont use no lights and we look like a bunch of ninjas we can drill santa and hi tail it and no one hears us and ricky tolt billy bob that if they had a tandem we woodnt even have to stop but jimmy bob and joe bob and me said that tandem bikes were for fags and canadians and that put an end to that

its christmas after all we draw the line at some things like painting dirty stuff is just bad and it aint funny

when it comes to lites when ricky asks for a match i tells him yeah, yor face and my ass and he falls for it ever time because ricky is a dummass

bunker said...

stay off my wave.

bodi said...

100% pure adrenaline.

gary abusee said...

utah, give me two.

Ed Sporak said...

"Yeah, instead of just placing the vials on a surface of some kind I think I'll hold them up in the air so people can see my ink. Check it out, a full sleeve. They don't give these to just anybody."

http://www.universalsports.com/pics22/668/VQ/VQRTBUXYGRLPIOA.20081203224354.jpg

mono_vs_stereo said...

That BMC p-far had me laughing my ass off. Then I checked the BMC site just to make sure it wasn't real. Sometimes I'm not too smart.

But I have a front brake on both fixies, so AYHSMB.

kale said...

... Feta, Pepsi, yogurt... Baby, where's the.. oh there's the steroids! Nevermind!

tri.bassett said...

Lance just twittered you again. I'm thinking that he's got an unhealthy obsession with BSNYC.. Time to start drafting the restraining order... Or get a better publicist..

Anonymous said...

OMG lance is on to BSNYC! This is going to get interstingfunny!!!

Anonymous said...

who do think you are?
a God?
Far from it.

Mark said...

Don't even have a bike and had fun reading this blog.

Jayo said...

Living fast and balling at christmas time . . . .

Please listen to Dipset Xmas time!

Anonymous said...

The OC SINGS! The OC plays air drums for almost 10 minutes! Is a professional cyclist becoming a professional musician? Anyway the singing part is about 1:00 minute into the video.

Samuel said...

i don't get the hormel reference. it's really bothering me!

also, last night, i dreamt that i had bike snob faux knuckle tat gloves.

kale said...

Lance wants a race for your identity, Snobby. I, for one, think you can beat him in the rematch from Staples to Madison Sq. Park.

Urban Messiah said...

Enjoy your 15 minutes. But...doesn't Sufjan sing a song about taking a dude's pants off and getting caught by his dad?

k2 said...

I think Lance has a crush on your site... I must be living under a rock, it rules... hilarious!

Hjulcompaniet said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Andy Pandy said...

Would have thought that a Canadia-ian mullet would have been a sock eye salmon... just fishin

ken e. said...

Turning cliches into magic....

Anonymous said...

bikesnob

have you seen this site?

http://fggcyclingwmd.blogspot.com/

ErikCrapton said...

Curt Harnett??? That guy looks like Joey Silvera!

90s porner Joey Silvera, i.e.

Too old for this shit said...

"Commenting"is a function where one leaves 'comments', you christing desperate whore-children.

Podium? Ant1st? Geeziz - and then arguing about double posts not counting etc etc. Do we not have lives, motherfuckers? Does one not have something better to do than sit there, mouse finger on the ready to be the very first motherfucker to leave their shit stain in the comments section, without really saying anything? The first 30 comments are all about being on the podium or not being on the podium, but one really should be top three cos one other fucktard got there before one and 'commented' twice, once with a wistful, i was a battered child exclamation, and then the second time to truly confirm one is indeed a troll with fuckall better to do than to leave empty one word messages on a blog site. To be first mind you. In the comments section. On a blog site.

Why does something so infantile get up my skirt so badly? Fucking blue mondays

Critical Ass said...

Depeche Mode? Jesus, you ARE too old for this shit.

leroy said...

Dear Mr. Too Old for this Shit:

You inquire as to whether some of us have something better to do with our lives.

The answer, of course, is yes.

We just choose not to do it at the moment.

leroy said...

Note to Mr. Armstrong:

I see from your Twitter that you are wondering if anyone knows who BSNYC is.

On a metaphysical level, do any of us know any one? I mean really know them?

On a practical level, there is some evidence that BSNYC is one of several riders training in Prospect Park while wearing a chicken suit.

I realize you may want something more specific, so look for the guy whose suit has a beak that opens to allow access to energy gels.

(I got my chicken suit from Bike Nashbar. It's nice, but the beak doesn't open. Can't complain though. It was on sale.)

Anonymous said...

Critical Ass -

Blue Monday - New Order

kale said...

"Too old" probably meant the Orgy cover.

Depeche Mode's song about not getting the podium is played out.

kale said...


Take second best
Put me to the test
Things on your chest
You need to confess
I will deliver
You know I'm a forgiver


-Depeche Mode, "Personal Jesus"

ant1 said...

the only time a cyclist getting hit by a car is funny. I was just down there last weekend, and the locals are not bike friendly at all.

http://www.wsbtv.com/news/18227104/detail.html

ant1 said...

Dear Mr. Too Old for this Shit:

What other actions/games people play that do not affect you in the least piss you off? I want to make sure I'm not potentially offending you by doing things I do everyday, like trying to make a 3 pointer everytime I throw a piece of paper away while at work.

I also admire your ability to judge people based on a little game they like to play while sitting at work. Is your life so devoid of joy and happiness that you have to go off on random strangers just because they don't appear to be as miserable as you, viewed from the tiny window you have onto a single aspect of their lives? My dad beat me, that's what you can tell by my use of an exclamation point, Sigmund? What should I make of your use of a lower case i? Your dad kept you in the basement where he and his friends would have NAMBLA nights at your expense? That when you finally did escape, you where left unable to tolerate joy in others?

I could go on and on, but I've got to drop everything I'm doing so that I don't miss my chance to piss you off with today's comment race. It's the only thing I live for, if you can call it living, so I'd hate to miss it. Got my refresh finger all lubed up.

Antfuckyou!

Critical Ass said...

Ant - I'm staying FAR away from that "refresh finger"

Bill said...

man, now i'm never going to be able to chuckle when i see ant1st, i'm just gonna think of him holding up a lubed up finger. damn, tooold had to go and ruin it for everybody.

leroy said...

ant1 --

The town you mention is where I got the nick name "leroy." I consider myself lucky. It could have been worse; it could have been "Bubba".

I lived there for a little bit. I still go back often and bring a bike. (I love the smell of Georgia asphalt in August. It smells like ... well, I'm not exactly sure what, but if your training regime includes hurling, it's a handy smell.)

My experience is that it's not a bad place to ride (unless you want to climb) and has a couple of good LBSs.

Strange, huh? You would think the paradise of NYC's Second Avenue Bike Lane would make all other experiences pale in comparison.

But I'm not sure I would take on the Truman Parkway -- although I hear there is a fast paced weekly ride along part of it (after rush hour, of course).

ant1 said...

Leroy - It's an awesome town. My friends and I have been riding our bikes from atlanta down to savannah for the last couple of years. Great ride, except for the rain this year. As far as riding in and around, I'm pretty clueless since by the time we get down there, all I want to do is get to the hotel as fast as possible and take a nice long hot shower with my lubed up finger. After which I don't want to see a bike for the next week.

kale said...

antchristingdesperatest-

That must be good podium lube if it survives a hot shower.

Wax based?

ant1 said...

kale - of course, only the best for this dude.

Anonymous said...

FNGR LUBE

Cognorant said...

Man I love a good douchebag ass kicking on a Monday morning...nice going ant1

KOA said...

Urban Messiah-

It was not about taking a "dude's" pants off. That was speculation. One...how many dudes wear a blouse? Also, if it was a dude wearing a blouse, what would the excitement be in almost touching it?

kale said...

What band doesn't have a song about taking your pants off?

Dads or no, it makes for a good situation.

RatherBeBiking said...

What "Too old for this shit said.."
+1, minus being an asshole about it.

The podium stuff is really boring. Make an interesting comment or don't make one at all.

ant1 said...

Interesting comments are in the eye of the beholder. If podium comments weren't ineteresting to some, do you think people would keep playing?

Anonymous said...

red lantern!
love,
lance armstrong's remaining nut

kale said...

RatherBeBiking-

But, I have a blog that keeps track of the podium race. If it ceases to continue, I will be unable to maintain a steady income from Google ads.

Anonymous and ant1 are tied for first.

red neckerson said...

anyone who dont like making comments here shood try capping inflatable santas with a bb gun its a lot more funner

Bill said...

lube 1st!!!

sorry, just warming up

RatherBeBiking said...

ant1 - No kidding. But the only ones who find it interesting are the people doing it. Makes for a pretty lame routine.

ant1 said...

It's a lame routine for the uninterested. Like I find new issues of seventeen magazine lame. That's why I don't read it, nor complain about those who do. The fact that they exist, however, does not piss me off in the least. When I'm looking at a magazine rack and see mags I don't care about, I don't go complain to the store manager. The rack is there to please as many people as possible, like this comment section is there for everyone to comment.

oldgabe said...

Is there a place to podium last? If so....podium...hahaha take that too old guy.

RatherBeBiking said...

So by your logic, you're equivalent to the publisher of 'Seventeen'?

Man, sucks to be you!

somebody has gotta do it, I guess.

ant1 said...

Maybe someone should start a podium free BSNYC site. Just copy and paste whatever Snobby posts, and have someone moderate the comments so that no First! come through.

Critical Ass said...

I don't look at it either unless there's a good Jonas Bros. artice

Charlie Kaufman said...

i dont mind the podium comments.
its the comments about the podium comments that really tick me off.
but comments about the comments about the podium comments (like this one) are my absolute favorite

ant1 said...

No, by my logic you're one of those people that's always complaining about things, no matter how trivial they may be, or how unaffected they may leave you. You also seem to be one of those people who likes to talk shit about what other people enjoy, just because you find it lame, and anyone who sees it differently is obviously an idiot.

And what do you do for a living that allows you to look down upon mere magazine publishers?

frilly said...

How is it that Lance doesn't know who Snob is? After all he invited him to his party last summer. How did he know who to invite?

RatherBeBiking said...

ant1,

Sorry I set you off by insulting your little game. I think this got a little too personal when you started making random assumptions about my character.

Nice playing with you.

Daddo said...

frilly - snob does have an alter ego - i'm sur eit was the A/E that got the invite.

or, more likely, the A/E that crashed the party

ant1 said...

random? they were based on your previous comments. Either way, good game.

frilly said...

Crashing the party does make sense. Otherwise, how would LA's peeps know to invite just 'some guy'?

red neckerson said...

i thinking some of you fellers must not be getting any lately

im just trying to hep

kale said...

wn!pod umop!sdn

red neckerson said...

and i aint waiting no longer im first i dont need no bug feller ragging on me and it aint my fault that the snobberator is so damm slow today

Daddo said...

how do you know snob is just "some guy"?

maybe he's a hot shot racer, dealer, dope tester...etc.

but probably crashed is right

Anonymous said...

http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/2008/dec/1/LorenSjostrom.htm
Not all things found on the side of the road dead should be brought back to life. Cue The Ramones "I don't want to be buried in a bike cemetary"

Tex said...

Hurryup Snobby! It's gettin' ugly down here.

frilly said...

Just saying by his own account he's just a couch occupying meh racer who's a good fucking writer.

Although, now that you mention it, he does make reference to dope quite a bit. How long does peyote stay in the system?

ant1 said...

neckerson - lately?

Frilly - not long enough.

ant1 said...

If snobby keeps stalling we might get to 200 comments.

ant1 said...

Neck - "just trying to hep" is that A, B, or C.

KOA said...

i agree. 200 is approaching rapidly.

kale said...

Let me ask you something. When you come in on Monday, and you're not feelin' real well, does anyone ever say to you, "Podium"?

No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' something like that, man.

Tex said...

Jeez, Kale! What the hell was that?

kale said...

what was what?

leroy said...

Kale --

Aargh, my eyes! My eyes!

Okay, I did my part to get us to 200 comments.

Someone else pull.

Tex said...

That pitcher ya linked to.

ant1 said...

By the time I come in to work, all the podiumeers have long been there, so I don't get to hear their triumphant "podium!"s. I don't get pissed at the monday morning college football talk though. Or the college basketball talk, which is something I don't care about, unlike football.

ant1 said...

kale - is that Jan making a comeback?

Tex said...

That picture is unsettling, and I need to understand why.

Only 20-something to go!

ant1 said...

ant1st!

kale said...

I think it's a picture of Snob's run at the Madison.

Anonymous said...

http://www.flickr.com/photos/thomaskrap/3053703533/

thought you might find this interesting

jdevine said...

Bike locks yall. Thats all i have to say.

http://www.bike-locks.com

Aparna said...

Last bike is really cool.

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