Monday, June 16, 2008

This Just In: RTMS Attends Media Extravaganza!!!

I make certain sacrifices for anonymity, and one of those sacrifices is that I'm not invited to very many places. Instead, I'm "tipped off." Today, I was "tipped off" by a certain insider that there would be a big press conference in Astor Place at 1:00pm at which something bike-related would be announced. On top of that, various luminaries would also be present. So, since it was lunchtime and the weather was good and I was curious about the luminaries, I figured I'd head on over.

Basically, what they announced at the press conference was that this summer, for three Saturdays in August, certain streets in Manhattan will be car-free for part of the day, a program modeled after the Ciclovia in Bogota, Colombia. You can read a little bit more about it here on Streetsblog and on Gothamist, and I'm sure now that it's been officially announced there will be more details available elsewhere as well. I'd love to give you more details myself, but unfortunately I was standing close to the luminaries and far from the speakers so it was almost impossible to hear anything apart from the street noise.*

*(Update: in the interest of actual information, here's the press release and map.)

And who were those luminaries? Well, Paul Steely White from Transportation Alternatives was there. (I told him he had a nice ass and he seemed oddly flattered.) Also, Janet Sadik-Khan, the DOT Commissioner was there, as was David Byrne (who I'm pleased to report seems to be recovering nicely from his drunk cycling accident), Mayor Michael Bloomberg (of course) and, of all people, Lance Armstrong. I was especially pleased that Lance was there, because it gave me an opportunity to give him my thank-you gift much sooner than I'd expected. (If you're wondering, he seemed very pleased with it. Who wouldn't be?)

As far as the press conference itself, since I couldn't hear anything I confess my mind wandered a bit. I'm afraid I also didn't take pictures of the luminaries, since as an anonymous writer I actually don't like sticking my camera in peoples' faces, even at a press conference. (Exposed buttocks on the Brooklyn Bridge notwithstanding.) And an internet image search will yield tons of pictures of all those people anyway. However, I did take some pictures, which should give you a good idea of what it was like to be there:



The VIP bike parking. I'm guessing these belong to people like David Byrne and the Transportation Alternatives people. I was forced to lock up to a nearby lightpost. Fortunately the policeman was looking in the general direction of my bike, so I had a false sense of security.



The press. The various luminaries are to my left. As you can see the cameras are pointed at them. That's why I choose to remain anonymous.

Car-free Saturdays may be green, but this press conference was not. In fact, it spelled "death" for the local flora, which was trampled by inconsiderate bystanders. (I'd have laid down in front of the flowers to save them, but they'd have trampled me instead had I dared to block their precious view of Armstrong and I didn't want to soil my Primal jersey.)

Oh, "The Love Guru" is coming out. It didn't take long for the questions from the press to veer away from bikes and towards boring stuff like this whole OTB business, so between keeping an eye on my bike and anxiously checking the time this is the sort of thing I occupied myself with.

So there you have it. Will car-free Saturdays be a success? Has Paul Steely White finally learned his lesson about exposing himself? Will Michael Ball's autograph finally inspire Lance Armstrong to accomplish something? Only time will tell.

And now back to Rock Racing in Harlem.

41 comments:

Anonymous said...

first

Anonymous said...

second

Daddo said...

second

Unknown said...
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sjauch said...
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Anonymous said...

Anonymous as usual!

--CommentSnobNYC

Anonymous said...

And here I thought that they were announcing a Naked Bike Ride to protest oil dependency.

It seems we were all so distracted by Michael Ball this weekend that we missed the naked rides in London, Boulder and elsewhere.

http://nakedwiki.org/wiki/London

Of course these are serious rides, for a serious cause, raising serious issues.

For example:

If this catches on, how will Mr. Ball sell clothes?

And how do you clip in naked?

Unknown said...

You clip into the moccasin clips on your dreamcatcher bike. That's how Leroy.

Anonymous said...

What a gyp. No Lance photos? Such a tease.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 3:30pm,

Does the world really need more Lance photos?

--BSNYC

Ski Bike Junkie said...

Did Lance model the gift?

BikeSnobNYC said...

Ski Bike Junkie,

No--I'm sure he didn't want to run the risk of dirtying it before framing it.

--BSNYC

Anonymous said...

that love guru poster is hideous and impossible not to stare at. i understand.
j

bikesgonewild said...

...nowdays, if ya want lance photos, hey, check the on-line 'society' pages...

...& while i doubt that nyc will achieve the intimacy of bogata's ciclovia, it is an attempt by one of the world's major cities to accommodate a healthy social activity...two thumbs up...

...so was it lunch on the fly, bsnyc/rtms, in order to bring us this groundbreaking news ???..

Unknown said...

is this going to be complete with ciclovia dancercise activities?

Anonymous said...

And you may ask yourself
How do I work this blog?
And you may ask yourself
Where is that tall bike?
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful blog!
And you may tell yourself
This is not my beautiful wife!
Letting the days go by/let the water hold me down
Letting the days go by/water flowing underground
Into the blue again/after the sticker money's gone
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground.
Letting the days go by/into the silent water
Once in a lifetime/water flowing underground

And you may ask yourself
What is that beautiful bike?
And you may ask yourself
Where does that bike lane go?
And you may ask yourself
Am I right?...Am I bitter?
And you may say to yourself
MY GOD!...WHAT HAVE I DONE?

Anonymous said...

Snob, thanks for covering this event of great concequence for us. You have a gift for looking at the convoluted and extracting only the important. Like a human BS filter. I hear NBC is looking for a new newsman, man. You should apply. Press the Meat hosted by NewsSnobNBC, now that's a news show I would be proud to watch.

Strayhorn said...

Jeeze, that guy in the photo is wearing a pair of those awful UNC-CH basketball shorts. I have to put up with those around here, part of the cruft of working in Chapel Hill.

But I sincerely apologize for you having to look at people wearing sky-blue pillow cases made twee with the addition of faux-argyle diamonds.

Jim said...

People have asked why I left New York. It's usually hard to sum it up in a sentence, but this OTB thing shows the way.

I don't want to live in a place where the government isn't even smart enough to make money off of organized gambling.

Anonymous said...

Way to fall off after the one year.

Anonymous said...

The irony of trampled flora at a 'green' event reminds me of the end Burning Man. After a week of peace, drugs, and nudity, cars jockey for access to the one road out of the playa while drivers give each other the finger in fits of road rage.

Monk About Town said...

I'm pretty sure Lance is using personal appearance doubles at this point anyway. I'm a little disappointed to discover the other luminaries weren't those candle-in-a-bag things, though.

Anonymous said...

Room service taco,

A few years ago I attended a New York City Critical Mass. The end destination was a community garden in the Bronx. The residents of the South Bronx cheered as the cyclists rode by to their community garden, which the cyclists then proceeded to totally trash. That was May 2004. At the time, after watching what went on with that ride I though "man, this thing is headed for trouble". Two months later it headed right into NYPD-type trouble.

LK said...
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LK said...

Throw those bicycler riff raff something while I'm outa town!

To bad the city doesn't do something like this for the weekday commuters.

erik k said...

upon closer inspection this photo raises a few questions

Anonymous said...

Yesterday I was at the commercial drive car-free festival in Vancouver. What started as your typically quixotic 'bikes-will-save-the-world-from-all-its-ills' event and street hockey game has in a few short years become one big $15 massage and Nepalese purse sale event. Maybe NY's car-free experiment will close the gap and get to total commercialisation in two years. Perhaps Mr. Ball can help there. Or as he might say, 'their.'
MB

Anonymous said...

Erik K does it again. Well played, sir.

matt m said...

i wish seattle would do this too - currently all we've got is critical mass once a month.

Anonymous said...

Anon 5:54

I hear what you're saying. I used to do Critical Mass in Boston a few years ago until the rides started ending with either a Kryptonite to an SUV rear window or a motor vehicle assault on a bike.

RP said...

Pure razzamataz. The Spandexed Gourd

Bluenoser said...

You're living the dream snob.

-B

Anonymous said...

i saw a bear on the weekend. there was no blood. good and bad just get stuck together sometimes.
it’s unfortunate.
just sayin’

Anonymous said...

bears can smell period blood.

Anonymous said...

Bike Snob,

You gotta be careful out there.... Now I have you on video twice after leaving Lance's big ole car!! (and the Commuter Race)

Anonymous said...

I must have missed something - what does RTMS stand for?

Deano in Oz

Jonathan said...

rip torn's mug shot.

AnnaZed said...

Wait, is it just my mind ... or wouldn't this pedestrian thoroughfare be clogged with, you know, pedestrians and people with strollers and such ... making it kind of hard to ride a bike on?

I'm just sayin'.

AnnaZed said...

Oh, and The Spandexed Gourd person needs to stop making up names for himself and posting links to his sad derivative blog over and over. It's just depressing.

Sprocketboy said...

I guess Lance brought the Michael Ball-autographed hat to Canada this weekend!

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/servlet/story/RTGAM.20080617.wxbuzzbreakout17/BNStory/Entertainment/home

You would have thought that the press would have written about that, instead of Lance out in cottage country with that Kate Hudson non-cyclist person. I think she has a nice ass, though, but wonder if it compares to that of Paul Steely White. Snob, perhaps you could post some photos and let us rate them instead of taking us back to that nightmare moment on the Brooklyn Bridge.

AH said...

Erik K--
Fan-f-ing-tastic! (sorry for the self-censorship -- I'm at work)