Monday, June 25, 2007

Fixedgeargallery...of terror.

I think fixedgeargallery.com is great. People enjoy browsing it (me included), and it inspires people to learn to build bikes and post their own creations, of which they are often quite touchingly proud.
That said, here's a batch that pissed me off:


(URL: http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/2007/june/2/TyrelMears.htm)

For the most part, this is a perfectly nice road-going fixie, which is why the problems with it are so glaring. The forward-angled tri post is offensive--there is plenty of seat rail to run a straight post and maintain the same saddle position. Also, I'd give the bullhorns a pass if it wasn't for the awful brake lever placement. Take a look at a TT bike and position the lever properly.




(URL: http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/2007/june/2/sma_uci.htm)

There is no god that would allow this to happen, and therefore I conclude that there is no God.


(URL: http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/2007/june/2/AndrewMahon.htm)

As much as I detest top-tube pads, here's a bike that actually needs one. How else to protect the rider's genitals from their inevitable slide down this drastically-angled saddle? This bicycle is not straddled by the crotch of a human. A centaur rider, perhaps?



(URL: http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/2007/june/2/Ask77@Libero.It.htm)

In a previous post, I speculated that the BMX might be a logical successor to the track bike's Mantel of Trendiness, to which an insightful commenter replied, "Vintage bmx is the new white pleather rocker belt." As if to prove the sagacity of this comes this gag-inducing entry. Maybe there is a God, because this is in Italy, where I will hopefully never, ever see it.



42 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't know what you're talking about, man. That little BMX hoopty is sweet. Don't be surprised if you see that thing cruising around the Slope in the near future.

Rich B.

FigBug said...

Please post larger photos, or at least links to larger photos.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Another reason to avoid the Slope, Rich B.

Figbug: a reasonable request I'm happy to have accommodated.

Flavamost said...

Don't you think it occurred to the guy that there's a reason why he hasn't seen any ladies' frames built as fixed gears? The group photo made my day--in a kinda creep-tastic sorta way...

sumadis said...

while we're on the FGG topic - what's up with all the folks running flat pedals on fixed gears? other than working as an ejector seat, total lack of control, totally missing the point of fixed, I'm not sure what they're thinking - it's safer? hardly. every other day it seems theres a post from some eager newbie with a just-built IRO or something - and freakin' bmx flats or mks' without cages. stoopid.

Shane said...

We always assumed the answer to your 'WTF is the tipped saddle for'? question is that it enables the fixed-gear-no-idea folks to wear their low-crotch fashionista jeans on the bike without crotch snag embarrasment.

Your blogs rocks BtW.

Shane and Joy, your new fanbase in London.

SKiDmark said...

Vintage BMX has been priced out the reach of the average hipster a long time ago by the little rich kids who grew up into Republican business owners and then bought every bike they ever had and ever dreamed of having. Go check out www.vintagebmx.com and shit your pants at the price of a fucked up "P.K.Ripper" frame. You think used NJS frames have become overpriced?

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I speculated that the BMX might be a logical successor to the track bike's Mantel of Trendiness.

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