Friday, March 27, 2009

BSNYC Friday Non-Quiz!

(Jackalope makes a "booty call," by Erik K)


If I believe anything, I believe that rubbing books is fundamental. So I've been enjoying "The Evolution of a Cro-Magnon" by John Joseph, given to me by Stevil Kinevil of HTATBL, who foolishly left a $50 bill in the book which he's not getting back. (I already used the money to buy six pieces of Purple Haze cheese from Artisanalcheese.com. Granted, I bought it because I thought it was a strain of marijuana, but nonetheless, it was delicious and surprisingly smokable.) One thing about the book is that it reminds you just how much New York has changed over the years. Streets that were once the domain of drug dealers and thugs are now practically brimming with artisanal cheese. This was further underscored by my commute this morning. For example, people are no longer urinating on the streets. Instead, they're urinating tidily in plastic bottles and leaving them out for collection:



Also, graffiti taggers are promoting the eating of wholesome vegetables:



But it's not all bottled urine and greens. The streets of NYC are still full of malicious robots programmed with insatiable nun-lust:



Meanwhile, elsewhere, the abuse of barends continues unabated, as you can see from this photo, taken by a reader in Washington state:



There's an unwritten rule that prohibits the use of barends with riser bars. Obviously, this is mostly an aesthetic concern, and riders should simply do whatever makes them comfortable. But while I certainly believe in comfort and multiple hand positions, there is also such a thing as too many hand positions, as you can see here. Also, theoretically, there's really no limit to the number of barends you can install on a bicycle, since you can install one at the end of another. Really, the only limit to the number of barends you can put on a bicycle is how many barends you have at your disposal. Even with hipster cysts, you'll run out of room eventually--unless you keep putting hipster cysts on your barends. In any case, sometimes rules exist for a reason, so go easy on the barends (or hipster cysts) before someone mistakes you for an elk with Christmas lights tangled in your antlers and tries to make a trophy out of you.

On the opposite end of the handlebar spectrum are these, forwarded to me by another reader:



I like handlebars that tell you where to put your hands, which is why I was such a big fan of the Cinelli Neo Morphe. I also like that these bars take into account today's knuckle-tattooed riders. And they're not just cashing in on a trend, either. It's obvious they know their customer, since the hand placement markers are only at the top of the bars. For "fixters," the drops are strictly off-limits, and are simply vestigial structures meant to keep their bikes looking "tracky." I'm surprised they didn't add something to the drops like "High Voltage: Do Not Touch."

Of course, custom painted bars don't allow for practical things like grips or bar tape, which are anathema to many of today's riders. But not everybody's leaving their bars naked. Some are actually wrapping bandanas ove their bar tape, like this rider, spotted by this reader:


Clearly, this commuter means business. Not only is he in the big ring on his triple crank, but he's also opted for the HED Jet wheelset. Once those doors open it's going to be like the opening prologue of the Tour de France. I'm sure in his mind there's a Frenchman counting backwards: "quatre...trois...deux..." I only hope he doesn't take a nose dive when the clock strikes zéro and the doors open, because there's probably no start ramp outside of those doors and he's liable to end up lying on top of a twisted mass of shattered carbon and bent Taiwanese aluminum.

You'd think that ITTET people might be passing over the overpriced wheelsets and instead rubbing simple, economical, and durable wheels that cost about a quarter as much. Not so. In fact, a number of readers forwarded me this image, which shows that the fixed-gear expensive front wheel wars continue to rage unchecked:

I don't know which Lightweight wheelset that front wheel comes from, but the cheapest pair on Competitivecyclist.com costs $4,500. Using wheels like that for amateur racing is stupid enough; taking one of them, putting it on your track bike, riding around town in canvas boat shoes on what appear to be $19 Wellgo pedals (with the reflectors still on), and ending up at a fake bike shop is nothing short of a wolf jump. If you want to show the world you have too much money, why not just use your ATM card as a spoke card and paint your PIN on your deep-section rim? You might as well add your SSN too. That way people can steal the identity you're trying so desperately to forge.

Speaking of theft, you might also think that ITTET people might make doubly-sure their bikes are locked up properly. After all, circumspection is free. (And a lot less painful than circumcision.) However, this is clearly not the case, as evidenced by these photos, taken by a reader in Williamsburg:


While the rider has taken great pains to secure both wheels, he's unfortunately missed the pole altogether:

While the hard-anodized rim and colored tire combo might be enough to deter Jobst Brandt (Jobst Brandt is the world's most outspoken opponent of both hard-anodized rims and silica tires), I'm relatively certain most thieves would ignore his warnings of decreased durability and simply make off with the whole bike sandwich.

Lastly, if you've been on the fence about buying the hillbilly-hipster-gun-cult-beach-sex-fixed-gear-conversion bike, a number of readers have alerted me to a new product that might make up your mind for you. Yes, drinking 40s while you ride has just gotten a lot easier thanks to the new Advent Gigunda cage:



The Advent Gigunda cage is a hipster's dream come true, as it provides yet another reason to not put something in your messenger bag. With your Kryptonite chain around your waist, your beer on your downtube, your keys hanging from your belt or bicep, and your phone, iPod, and other accessories safely holstered, you can rub your messenger bag the way it was intended to be rubbed--as a flat decorative shawl-like cover for your shoulders.

Rub your bikes safely this weekend, and watch out for jackalopes and/or callbacks!


--BSNYC/RTMS




127 comments:

mattoidbunko said...

Jackalope!

Anonymous said...

podiums!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

booya third!

Anonymous said...

podium

Anonymous said...

Top 5 RM

Anonymous said...

Top ten, again!!!

Anonymous said...

Smash, top ten!

Matthew Baldwin said...

top 10

Anonymous said...

solitude stands in the doorway!

mikeweb said...

Top 10?!?!

Anonymous said...

Now I want a touring frame so that I can carry three 40's...PBR, of course.

Anonymous said...

top 12, read the whole damn thing. awesome.

Anonymous said...

Tiny Randy in a Wizard suit

Unknown said...

NON-QUIZ!?!?! The BSNYC friday funtastic quiz makes my day. How could you skip it. I hope when I read the post there is some explaination

Ronsonic said...

And I would've had a good shot at a podium if I hadn't read this thing. I got to the bottom and saw "0 Comments."

Why am I stupid enough to read this first. I could be one of the cool kids.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Gary,

It's such a lovely day here in NYC (weatherwise--it sucks otherwise) I figured I'd give people a break. Sorry!

--BSNYC

hillbilly said...

I saw that bottle of urine this morning on the manhattan bridge!!! why am i excited about this!?

Surly Bastard said...

That's one hot looking Jackalope.

Anonymous said...

Woot! Woot!

Anonymous said...

Blackjack.

Strayhorn said...

So, the hipsters have graduated from PBR to 40s of Miller . . .

I'm not sure this is progress. In fact, it makes me worried. I my day, the hipsters were all hippies. Then they became yippies. And then they became yuppies - and promptly wrecked the economy.

Seeing hipsters drinking Miller fills me with a sense of foreboding.

Anonymous said...

Holly crap...So yesterday I go to my LBS to buy a tube of rim cement. After searching behind the counter frantically, the salesperson finds a half-used tube, hands it to me apologetically, and tells me that in the last few weeks "the fixie kids" bought them all. Apparently tubulars are the new thing with fixsters out here, or else they just huff it. Anyway, I wasn't really surprised to see the Lightweight.

Anonymous said...

I can only get PBR 40's from the whole foods here in SLC. Weird...

mikeweb said...

What that Manhattan Bridge bike path needs is some schweet art on the retaining walls at each end. I vote for a 30 foot long mural of a piss-filled Poland Spring bottle on the Brooklyn side.

Can anybody second that?

mikeweb said...

BTW, where is that Jack 'n Jimbo's shop anyway? By the looks of it, that place needs to be firebombed, pronto...

Anonymous said...

Dude! That HED deep disher is here in Denver. I see him every morning riding down by the DTC.

He rubs a bandana on his head Il Pirato style and is the best traffic weaving, car against bike violence instigator out there.

I'd forgotten my camera on numerous occasions to document this species, and, submit it to BSNYC, but, looks like someone else took care of it.

AYHSMB

Anonymous said...

Speaking strictly as the Roman governor of Judaea from 26 CE to 36 CE, let me tell you something about the 40s that we drank back in the proverbial:

They were Ballantine XXX Ale Forty Ouncers, and they were delicious. Better than the blood of a so-called “King of the Jews,” that much I do know.

Hail Caesar –

P.P.

Daniel said...

I don't know which Lightweight wheelset that front wheel comes from, but the cheapest pair on Competitivecyclist.com costs $4,500.

All that and he's still shorter than the girl he's trying to talk to, poor bastard.

Anonymous said...

I am starting to acquire a crush on Erik K. Those images = demented, yet subtle.

WheelDancer said...

Doesn't it have to be AYHFMB now that the snob has entered the mainstream media?

Anonymous said...

On the other side of the shop, expect to see season Jack Spade products including bags, accessories, and an edited selection of ties, outerwear, and apparel.

thank god they have ties!!

Anonymous said...

I wish that Jackalope would stop smelling my ass and get on with it.

Anonymous said...

art is anal cheese . com ?

Anonymous said...

I don't think that's a bandana wrapped around the coffee shop dude's handlebars, I think it's spare bandages for the inevitable crash in his upcoming time trial.

Anonymous said...

ho ho he he you made fun of hipsters wow.

CommieCanuck said...

Apparently, you guys don't know that one of the number 1 selling products in pharmacies in Alberta and BC is clean urine for dope testing. In America, it's just free on the roads, the land of milk and honey and piss.

Speaking of pee-pee, in England, some youths decided it would be hilarious if they infiltrated a marathon race in Newcastle and replaced water cups with cups of urine. They then waited for runners to grab a cup off the table at the 15 mile mark and douse it over their heads.

Come to think of it, ...that is hilarious.

MINGUStheMECHANIC said...

Hmm a warm 40 shaken through every bump in brooklyn sounds just right.

Anonymous said...

the urine bottles come from cab drivers who use them as pee-pee containers and then ditch them when no one is looking

db said...

Trucker bomb!

Anonymous said...

the opening prologue

There have been altogether too many lapses this week. To make amends, will you use the word "madcap" in a post next week?

Heaps of praise otherwise.

liz said...

Death Spray Custom

"...limited run custom produce"

custom produce?
like deep V glow-in-the dark lettuce?

Anonymous said...

anon 1:42...um, all of them? you're sure?

Pedal Strike Force Agent Down said...

Oh!

I didn't study for the quiz and it paid off!

Anonymous said...

That guy with the fancy bike with the bandannas is representing Texas.

A lot of Texans are very proud of the shape of Texas.

Marissa said...

Maybe the 40 oz. holder is simply a clever disguise for an extra large pee bottle. That way, you don't have to leave it in the road. Plus, I hear the natural evolution for hipster beverages is PBR can to Miller 40 oz. to urine in a Miller 40 oz. bottle.

Also, I, too, miss the quiz.

kale said...

Why blow the "golden" opportunity of attempting to piss on the N/Q by making some trucker tea. Unless it's one of those freaky things from the "casual encounters" cl section.

All things being equal Snob, it's good to see photographic evidence that you still ride your bike.

libertyonbikes! said...

and instead of the usual rusty
squeeling pulleys,
snob found himself whistling
zipidee dodaa
to the bird perched on his shoulder
my,
what a wonderful day....

Cameron said...

I'm not making this up:
In college I had to kick out a roommate for not paying rent. In the process of moving his shit into the yard I was thrilled to discover he was stealing my cable t.v. on behalf of our downstairs deadbeat neighbors, and that he kept a soda bottle of urine under his bed. For the random drug tests I suppose?

Also, on the brilliant lock job: I spied the exact same "fakey" in progress at the train station a couple months ago. I was curious at the time if the guy did it on purpose or he was just THAT dumb.

grog said...

"High Voltage: Do Not Touch"
or
"Police Line, Do Not Cross"
or
"AYHFMB"

Anonymous said...

I just heard some people's feelings get hurt.

Anonymous said...

Strange, I just saw one of those repurposed water bottles minutes after reading this.

Also, never thought of it til now, but I'm surprised I haven't seen messages on bars before with all that unused space. May I suggest "GIMME A BREAK".

Anonymous said...

maybe the people with flat messenger bags are planning to pick things up later? i mean, snob, if your bag is always full (that sounds dirty) and you decide to stop and pick up that nice lounging smock you have been eyeing, whereever will it go?

Anonymous said...

all you quiz-missing haters suck my SSN.

brilliant post snobbers.

Anonymous said...

whoa, 10 digits long??!!

CommieCanuck said...

There's no quiz this week as it's too late in the academic term and too close to final exams.

I don't want to alarm anyone, but that Jackalope photo may be faked. Madoff, Stanford, AIG, Erik K..what are the morals of America coming to?

I like the good old Bush days when you just bombed a country and were done with it. No second guessing.

CommieCanuck said...

BTW.. how do you tell that bottle of piss from Coor's lite?

The CEO of the bottle of pee is not a white supremacist.



















zing.

Anonymous said...

I was deeply offended that the bandana-bar guy was rocking a Wilson backpack instead of a hipster-approved Chrome messenger bag. Can somebody please take him aside privately and explain to Mr. Clueless the error of his ways?

kale said...

Commie-

What?

Anonymous said...

Hey, there's a decorative chainsaw in that fake bike shop!?!
So, it's hillbilly-esque "hipster"?

Uh, oh. It is all coming together...

Anonymous said...

Commie says

"the number 1 selling products in pharmacies in Alberta and BC is clean urine for dope testing" [sic]

Probably due to the rapid influx of you eastern creeps and bums

;)

Unknown said...

where da quiz at
get w program plz

jolene said...

you see if it wer in viper that wood be a mantin dew can with cope spit in there not piss you city folk dont now shit about how things run out here it makes me laf yes and us chiks dip tew what you think we was i saw a coon steal my babys swis roll this morning those buggers is gitten ornry at brekfist it shore made a funny site

Granny Panties USA said...

I'm old enough to remember when OE 40's were the ironic drink of choice of the early 90's hipsters. It's come full circle.

Anonymous said...

Don't get me wrong BSNYC, I love your blog, read it every day, and can understand the whole "Bicycling" thing, although I will admit to some disappointment, having sworn off that condescending rag years ago ("buy it IF you", "23 ways to climb like Lance!!,etc.). No one nails that rag like you do (used to?), in fact your first post about "laterally stiff and vertically compliant" was required reading at the shop where I worked. Just a bit of post English major pique the other day about habitual callbacks. Callbacks or not, you're the best of the bunch. Hell, I can't even THINK of a callback for this comment.

Seanywonton said...

More bikes, less gun-toting hipsters.
This is good.

Marzio& said...

DUDE with the lightweight front wheels come on bro.with the easton track bars&tt-fork at least have the ARAYA track disc..

foool...

CommieCanuck said...

William Coors,

Talking to a group of Mexican and African business owners in 1984, he said: "...ancestors were dragged here in chains against their will… I would urge those of you who feel that way to go back to where your ancestors came from, and you will find out that probably the greatest favor that anybody ever did you was to drag your ancestors over here in chains, and I mean it."

CommieCanuck said...

I was willing to let it go until he added, "...and I mean it."

Atlatl said...

Nice, glad to see you mentioned Cypress Grove cheese (the company that makes Purple Haze). That stuff is made in Humboldt County where I live. And Purple Haze is pretty damn good.

juliasets said...

Bike Snob is in a super good mood today. It's because of that purp, I am sure of it.

Luck E. Seven said...

Great post! Pass!

Fabric Horse utility belts? Are you fucking kidding me?!? It's even got a spot to put your weed in there! Can I get a pair of spats to match, please? I'll be rubbing some kinda WWI-era carpenter look in no time.

Erik K- brilliant as always. RISD?


A

Anonymous said...

Yup. Picture #4 in the link shows a chainsaw in Jack and Jimbo's Bike Shop on Bleecker Street.

Now, BSNYC, is it proper to holster the saw, cram it in my bag, or wear it slung over my back when riding?

It's hard to be hip.

CommieCanuck said...

Atlatl..RTMS panders to the cheese community to increase blog traffic. Check out his older posts, "Ami du Chambertin..are you ready to Rock?"

Anonymous said...

The lightweight wheel: Is this another case of one person's irony being another's idiocy? Maybe it's all a big joke. Our man took the time to fix aero fork and pricey wheel to the cheapest rig in his "stable" -- HiLarious. This, again, may be a case of the Snob taking a picture too literally. On the other hand, owning a $4,500 wheel, regardless of the bike it's attached to ... there's your crime right there -- roll out the guillotine -- let the revolution begin.

ant1 said...

anon 4:45 - Please leave the calling for guillotines and revolutions to the french. It's the only thing we really know how to do.

CommieCanuck said...

AIG executives all got Lightweight wheels this January.

ant1 said...

...Chris Dodd put a last minute provision in the stimulus packet requiring AIG to buy lightweight wheels for all its executives. He'll deny it if you ask him, though.

Anonymous said...

Seems the trend in the Snob's contempt for those who deviate from his approved cycling "style" is for those of wide girth and middle age. I think the Snob will realize as he emerges from his painfully self-conscious adolescence, that there is a psychological space called adulthood where one, basically, doesn't give a shit what anyone thinks. I guess I'm just getting tired of the facetious "that dude is totally awesome" comments when the object of that derision is actually enjoying life more than the pathologically vain children making fun of him/her.

As I don my tube socks before slipping into my carbon-soled cycling shoes (sans cleats), I bid adieu to this blog.

And, I know, it says it right at the top "BikeSnob" -- so, the Snob gets a check next to "truth in advertising."

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 5:21pm,

Uh...bye?

--BSNYC

ant1 said...

anon 5:21 - If by "those of wide girth and middle age" you mean hipsters, than yes, you are right.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Ant1, can you remind me what time the next invasion of France by Germany is scheduled for? I know it's coming up soon.

ant1 said...

Funny how the rate/quality of posts on the comments page declines sharply after 5 pm. I'll go ahead and take the blame for the quality part, but as far as quantity (and my shortcomings in life) goes, I blame everyone else.

Fenriz said...

Time trailist commuter essentials:

HED wheels
Shaved legs
Hip mounted iPod
Lone Star Primal Wear jersey over loosefitting hoodie
Cargo tape for bartape
Wilson backpack (has a great backhand)
Forward tilted drops with downward facing levers, and tribars you'll have to twist his elbows to get into.

Good thing he took the train.

bikesgonewild said...

...there ya go, anon 5:21pm...now, don't you feel free & unencumbered...

...excellent...so do we...

ant1 said...

Merckx - Every summer about 3 million of them blitzkrieg their way down A6 and invade the riviera. They pillage our beaches and rape the concept of fashion before being called back to the fatherland to ensure their continuing industral superiority, since without it they couldn't afford to summer somewhere nice. In the meantime, the french sit on their asses the rest of the year waiting for the germans to come back and spend all their cash on useless touristy crap. To recap: the germans work really hard to spend a month in the south of france. The french don't do shit and live year round where the germans wish they were, supported by said germans. Good times.

Leprechaun said...

Jesus Christ Snob, did you actually make fun of an old, fat guy? You Bastard. I quit too (unitl next Monday).

Bluenoser said...

You know you've hit rock bottom when you get hit in the back of the head with a bottle of piss thrown at you as someone yells out the window piss off fag.

Maybe snob should have looked in the river for a head injured cyclist.

-B

Bluenoser said...

And how the hell does anyone from The Hammer get called Eastern?

-B

Bluenoser said...

Which is not east not west, it's Ontario.

-B

Bluenoser said...

The next invasion of France by Germany... I so want to be there with the underground this time Rocking/Rubbing a BMX through the sewers with an iBob trailer sneaking out tourists.

-B

Anonymous said...

I don't see the chainsaw.

Anonymous said...

Check the link.

Toxteth said...

I bet Anon 5:21 reads Mondays post...

Not only are your callbacks great, I suggest you write a complete post as a single Chiasmus. Just a thought.

Anonymous said...

Are you going to take that commie?

An Eastern Ontario type.

Anonymous said...

i like the lightweight but the guy gets negative points for having a chub hub on the rear.....tryiiiinng a little too hard.

Anonymous said...

What the fuck is a club hub???

Anonymous said...

It must be a busy night. The regulars aren't defending themselves

Bluenoser said...

He looks left...

Bluenoser said...

He looks right...

Bluenoser said...

100 for the weekend.

What a wait.

-B

Anonymous said...

Nicely done sweetie.

Anonymous said...

What is ITTET?

Anonymous said...

ITTET = In These Trying Economic Times

leroy said...

Awww shucks, whose heart doesn't just melt when one sees an adorable jackalope?

Ride safe this weekend!

Anonymous said...

More like AYHCMB, amirite?

Occasional Geared Reader said...

okay so I just read the By-cikling column from our RTMS namesake and have to say it does not compare to the real thing of the daily posts (except the ones when Snobby was on vacation a while back, those sucked). Not even TEMPTED to laugh out loud even once was I with the mag copy version. But with the long production lead times I can understand how the timely content will continue to be featured in the up to the minute blogosphere medium.

BTW they call them trucker bombs here in da midwest. Yuck!

Fred said...

Anon 521 said:
there is a psychological space called adulthood where one, basically, doesn't give a shit what anyone thinks.

Umm, no. Not giving a shit what other people think is called adolescence. At some point, most of us develop something called empathy. Also the ability to disagree without slamming your bedroom door, cranking up Frank Marino & Mahogany Rush and screaming fuck you into the pillow like 800 times.

Good luck in your future endeavors, Anon 5:21, good luck.

Sweet William said...

Yet another reason to drink Liitle Creatures' Pale Ale -the 600ml fits
in a std bidon cage.


(http://www.littlecreatures.com.au/)

d. fofonov said...

I am confusing about jackalopes. They are not listing in Russian Wikipedia which is final speaking of any important knowledge.

I am looking for them next time I am going proximal to Chernobyl.

Anonymous said...

I don't think that's beer in the hipster 40oz bottle in the carrier. I think it's a portable urinal. If only the guy on the Manhattan bridge had one, he could have carried it home and disposed of it like a civilized person. Sheesh.

Anonymous said...

anathema? How long have you been waiting to squeeze THAT into a blog?

Anonymous said...

After seeing the picture of the Jackalope performing a "booty call", I can see why The Competitive Cyclist lists Assos Chamois Creme as their number 1 selling product. Those horny little buggers must copulate like rabbits.

Anonymous said...

so you guys figured out who bsnyc is yet?

Anonymous said...

BikeSnob is happy because he got a beach visit from the Jackalope.

Anonymous said...

I would talk shit about the Lightweight front wheel but the fact that Prolly is "rockin" a Canecreek rear wheel really give everything away... I wonder if it's a sew-up? Then again I really don't care.

Cheers! The Anti-Skid

P.S. That foe-fixie shop is in NYC right?

NOT North St. Louis?

MJ Klein said...

opening photo has Rip Torn on the seat tube?

MJ Klein said...

pretty dangerous pissing into an empty 40 PB.... might mistake it for the one you just opened.

Sam H. said...

I almost spit my coffee out when I saw the pic of the guy with the bandana on the bars and HED rims. His name is Daryl, and he is insane.

He has a blog called "the athletes rise and fall in the world". He can be found here: http://redhooktyrant.blogspot.com/

He started commenting on our blog a year ago and I've been kind of obsessed with him from then on. His rants are incomprehensible.

Jakerock said...

bliss.

Anonymous said...

<3

Jonathan said...

Sweet William: it is indeed a thing of beauty.

jkgagnon said...

http://cgi.ebay.ca/Pake-track-bike-fixed-gear-custom-build-55cm_W0QQitemZ370178419855QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item370178419855&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=72%3A1215%7C66%3A2%7C65%3A12%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318

Get your fixed pie plate before it's gone.

Anonymous said...

Prologue-man has an entire post on the minutae of his Coca-Cola buying habits?!?! He actually drinks that crap? I guess that accounts for his middle-aged wide girthness.

Oops, did I say that?

Slappy said...

SNobberZ, slappy the STOMpARIlla here,
IN my quest to get from brKLYN back to ColyRADo, i happened upon that Jack and Jimbo party. Rapha party don't you know, well the Boyz from the BrKLYN Bike Y B and myself had firebombed the manhattan bridge(in full stompa gear I might add, puttin' some hipster in the hurt locker on the downhill), and the girl at the door, whose clipboard had mtv somewhere, was told to certainly allow anyone with messenger bag. Which is funny because my pet dumpster, a re-load that is wicked RAD, in a purple, fluoro green embroidered spray paint kinda way... Well the party was soooo hard to get to the bathroom that after i was making my way back, i put my reload on top of the precious young thing train that was transporting frenchfry baskets to the hordes, they thus paraded some STompariLLa bright idea goodness for all those dumboZ to see. Then I got drunk on their real nice beer and made friendZ with everyone, sweriously, xoxo slappy
ps, now i'm in durango with broken ankle, see ya latR!

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