Friday, February 10, 2017

BSNYC Friday Fun! (Quiz Not Included)

There's nothing like a snowstorm to bring out the best in humanity.  "Once more unto the breach!," cry the motorists as they place unwavering faith in their stupid cars and drive heedlessly towards disaster.  Inevitably the wind up stuck on the highway, crying "Why hast thous forsaken me?" into the dashboards of their Freedom Machines.  But it all works out fine, because here comes Governor Cuomo to the rescue:


Cuomo, in pictures his office posted on Twitter, is seen helping to hook up a tow cable to a Chevrolet Malibu that was stuck in the snow.

The governor came across the stuck vehicle at around 3 p.m. on the northbound Sprain Brook Parkway near the Hawthorne exit as he was surveying road conditions, Cuomo spokesman Richard Azzopardi said.

So why not escort an elderly person down some slippery subway stairs or across a slush-covered intersection?  Simple: that kind of photo-op doesn't occur to politicians who travel everywhere via chauffeur-driven SUV.  But you can be sure that when they come across some schmuck in a Malibu who ignored every warning for the past 24 hours and made the stupid decision to drive in a snowstorm they'll fall all over themselves extricate said driver from his or her self-dug hole.

Speaking of asking for it, as I mentioned yesterday, I got some new tires for my portly bike:


Which I plan to use all year round even though they're only rated for "Summer Fatbiking:"


I mean sure, I guess I can also use them for "bikepacking," "cross country," "trail," and "enduro"--though it doesn't specify what season, plus apart from "cross country" I don't really know what any of those other things are, so now I'm totally confused.

Even more confusing was that when I finally got a chance to mount them (onto the bike, that is) yesterday evening I noticed that I'm only allowed to ride these tires between 30-45psi, or else presumably I will die:


If you're unfamiliar with today's portly tires, even 30psi is stupendously high #whatpressureyourunning, and a more appropriate #whatpressureyourunning would be roughly half that.  Of course, I could probably just assume that this is some vestigial text from the days of primitive 26x1.8 mountain bike tires, and that WTB has forgotten to instruct the factory in Ghina to update it.  However, I think the more prudent course of action is to pen a neurotic screed to Lennard Zinn at VeloNews and wait for his reply:

Dear Lennard,

I recently purchased a set of 27.5 x 3.0 WTB Bridger tires.  What is the failure mode if I attempt to use them for any other purpose besides summer fatbiking and run them at a lower #whatpressureyourunning than 30psi?  Should I expect explosion or implosion?

Sincerely,

--Concerned Mountain Fred

PS: These are not fat bike tires, so how can I use them for "summer fatbiking?"  Isn't that like saying I can use a beef patty for a "winter vegan barbecue?"

Until I hear back rest assured I've surrounded the bike with yellow caution tape and don't plan to go anywhere near it.

In the meantime, I guess I'll just keep hitting refresh over at VeloNews, where the technical question du jour is this:


I’ve never quite understood how fork angle, fork offset, and the resulting trail affect the way a road bike feels and steers. In my life, I’ve had three racing bikes with these three very different front ends, and I thought if you could tell me what the numbers mean to you, it might help me and your other readers understand bike geometry a little better.

1. 73-degree fork angle with a 40mm offset and a 110mm stem.

2. 74-degree fork angle with a 45mm offset and a 90mm stem.

3. 72.5-degree fork angle with a 49mm offset and a 90mm stem.

All three felt solid at speed. No. 1 felt good until I got No. 2. With No. 2, I felt like I could just lean the bike and it would turn itself, which No. 1 did not. No. 3, my latest bike, doesn’t feel quite as intuitive going into the turns, but once in the turn, it feels the most rock-solid of them all. (It’s laterally the stiffest by far, which may be factor.) The only other comment I have is that the steering for No. 3, which is rock-solid at high speed, feels surprisingly loose at low speeds. I can’t recall feeling that with my first two bikes.

Zinn gives a lengthy reply which I couldn't read, since the obvious answer is that the rider is experiencing the effects of aging.  Consider:

--The first bike "felt good."

--The second bike felt like "could just lean the bike and it would turn itself;"

--The third bike "doesn’t feel quite as intuitive going into the turns, but once in the turn, it feels the most rock-solid of them all."

Right, so over the course of three bikes he went from awkward to overconfident to prudent.  Pretty simple really.  You're just getting old.  This is like asking a sex columnist, "Why does my penis handle differently?"

All three felt solid at speed.  No. 1 felt good but it was twitchy and over too quick.  No. 2 I felt like I could just lean in and it would go by itself.  No. 3 doesn't feel quite as intuitive, but once in the turn it feels the most rock-solid of them all.

You can even use the same diagram:


In other aging Fred news, Johan Bruyneel thinks people still give a shit what he thinks:



"I don't know what it is that's up with LeMond. It's not normal to be so obsessed with Armstrong," said Bruyneel, who is currently serving a 10-year ban for his involvement in doping.

"He has realised that people are less and less outraged by Lance, because it has become clear that he was only one of many who were doping, and that's why LeMond is now looking for something new with which to tarnish his name. But he's not going to manage it. They can keep trying until the year 3000 – they're not going to find mechanical doping.

I dunno, I don't think people are less and less outraged so much as they are less and less interested.  It's all really just this century's equivalent of the Tonya Harding scandal.  I'd also categorize both Bruyneel and LeMond as people from whom the world could quite contentedly never, ever hear from again.

Anyway, we all know Lance Armstrong was mötödöping after his comeback.  Remember how he kept crashing all over the place for no apparent reason?  It was because he wasn't used to all that power.  Also, he rode for RadioShack, a company that specialized in tiny motors, so he probably had some really glitchy piece of crap Tandy job in his seat tube that was retrofitted from a remote control car:



And if you don't think disc brakes and the new wide-tires--and-suspension-on-road-bikes trend is all about needing more traction because of the motor then you're kidding yourself:


One of the biggest benefits about hydraulic discs on road bikes has nothing to do with braking. By eliminating the constraints of a caliper wrapping around the rim, it’s now game on for fun tire options.

It’s funny to think that 25mm tires used to be absurdly large. No one went larger than a 23 for a road bike. Now we’re a bit more open minded — or maybe we’re just older and appreciate the extra cushioning.  

In any event, being able to run fat tires opens up your route as well as your traction and suspension capabilities. No, you don’t have to put monster-truck tires on your aero bike — but it’s great to have options.

1) When were 25mm tires "absurdly large?"  2) Someone should tell Fred that 28mm tires work perfectly fine on most old-timey road bikes with short-reach rim brakes.

On second thought, don't tell them, because then we can have their bikes when they throw them in the trash.

63 comments:

Anonymous said...

Suck it ted

Serial Retrogrouch said...

fuck ted k

Ted K. said...

210. So it is clear that if the industrial system were once thoroughly broken down, refrigeration technology would quickly be lost. The same is true of other organization-dependent technology. And once this technology had been lost for a generation or so it would take centuries to rebuild it, just as it took centuries to build it the first time around. Surviving technical books would be few and scattered. An industrial society, if built from scratch without outside help, can only be built in a series of stages: You need tools to make tools to make tools to make tools ... . A long process of economic development and progress in social organization is required. And, even in the absence of an ideology opposed to technology, there is no reason to believe that anyone would be interested in rebuilding industrial society. The enthusiasm for “progress” is a phenomenon peculiar to the modern form of society, and it seems not to have existed prior to the 17th century or thereabouts.

Anonymous said...

Ted K blows goats. I have proof.

dancesonpedals said...

All three felt solid at speed. No. 1 felt good but it was twitchy and over too quick. No. 2 I felt like I could just lean in and it would go by itself. No. 3 doesn't feel quite as intuitive, but once in the turn it feels the most rock-solid of them all.

I've taken number ones and number twos all my life, but never a number three. Thank got my number ones were never solid.

Soflo'd said...

Top five... almost....

Grump said...

25mm tires became absurdly large in the mid 80's, all through the 90's, and into the early 00's. A friend of mine had an early 00's Waterford that you couldn't fit a 25mm tire in back with out rubbing on the caliper. You might have heard of the first "racing" clincher, the Specialized Turbo. It was marketed as a 700x25, but was only 20mm wide.

Anonymous said...

Back in the eight aughts when I had a 52/42 crankset coupled to a 12-17 freewheel I think I was 'running' 700x19.

Anonymous said...

"The louder he talked of his honor, the faster we counted our spoons."
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

Frickus Rungus said...

We don't have the snow here, but it's "unseasonably warm" and windy as fuck. Today I was grinding up "the" hill that I have to climb on my way to work, fighting against the gusts of wind (40-50mph) and some guy ran right past me. I knew I was slow, but slower than a pedestrian? I should just give up and drive the car that I own, which I frequently have to take into the shop so that my mechanic can make his boat payments.

Chazu said...

XI

Fred Mercury said...

Frickus-
Are you in CO?

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

lucky 13....what, the guy from velo news only has 3 bikes??? wtf is wrong with him??

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...where I come from there were no Freds and no spandicks wearing weekend warriors (or, at least, there weren't when I was growing up... I visited some years ago and they have Freds now)... anyways, when I was growing up, every blessed bicycle had at least 28mm tires, fenders and at least one rack on which to portage groceries or other people. When I arrived in Canada's spittoon in the early 90s, my eyes couldn't adjust to how weird bicycles looked, how emaciated and naked sans fenders... though eventually I became a 'mercian and got myself one of them bendy handlebars... fenders be damned.

I'm happy to say, I'm back to my childhood ideals... fat tires, really fat fenders on ALL my beiks, and always a way to carry something not on my person when riding.

If I want to go fast, I just dope and ride my fendered fatty.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

"Freedom Machines"

Classic BSNYC irony right there. Nice.

If You Want Something Done Right said...

DYI Quiz:

Where is Wout?

1. There it is.

B. Belgium

III. ...holding onto a runaway bike.

Four. All of the above.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

I never heard of a place called Ghina. Or that they had tire factories there for that matter.

According to Urban dicktionary:

Ghina
A name originated from Arabic meaning 'Great Queen'. This name often crops up in love poems as being the centre of love and is known for its soft sound when spoken. The name is what defines and explains the great Arabian woman beauty and magnitizing magic and power that holds for eternal history and centuries.

A woman of perfection and beauty. She has complete power and is able to magnitize anyone and anything in the world. No one can be compared to her beauty, sensitivity, sensuality, sexiness, love, power, fun, sense of humor, and responsibility.

She is an angel sent from above.

A true woman with all means to define it. Complete power mixed with complete femininity. A Celtic goddess meaning lady of the people.

Something which embodies the trait of unmatched aesthetic and inner beauty, regardless of external influences. To be truly beautiful reflects an unparallel sense of eternity, unchanged by events or situations which may otherwise compromise such a trait.

Queen. A beautiful Arabian women who always gets her way.

The one true love.
Wow.. you must be a Ghina!

You're so lucky you're Ghina!

The luckiest man in the world is the man who marries Ghina.

James said...

6 of my 10 bikes are trash finds. Keep 'em coming. I need to upgrade.

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

sounds like a shortened form of VaGhina

dancesonpedals said...

Perhaps she lives in Virginia

bieks said...

Summer Fatbiking? I think I went to high school with her.

NoFX said...

Freedom Machine = Shopping Cart

Anonymous said...

The problem with Lance Armstrong isn't that he doped. It's that he lied about it, in every way possible. And many times worse, he trashed his friends when they told the truth. All to win, make money, and maintain appearances. His priorities as a human being are all wrong.

Lance Boil said...

In other words, Lance would be great on president Bannon's cabinet

Anonymous said...

You suck it, Ted Rules

Anonymous said...

Fuck Serial Retrogrouch. Ted is king

Anonymous said...

You are a goat dick. Ted Rules.

Bluezurich said...

Wait, the problems with Lance have finally been brought to light? And to think all along I've been working on the problems of Atle Kvosvall.

1904 Cadardi said...

"By eliminating the constraints of a caliper wrapping around the rim, it’s now game on for fun tire options."

Same can be said about the penis.

Victor Kaminski said...

vsk said ...

Ghina is Trumpspeak for China. You wait til the wall goes up in the Pacific.


vsk

JLRB said...

So the chubby tire doesn't want you riding to more than 2 or 3 bars - that makes sense, but do they think using the decimals (2.1-3.1) makes it seem like a more scientific analysis? What is this, kickstarter?

Aging Fred said...

Did you hear the one about the cyclist who was young, but with the passage of time...got older?

No?

Well, you will.

Lieutenant Oblivious said...

When I was growing up the nicer entry level 10 speed racers had 27x1-1/8 tires, and steel cranks held to the bottom bracket axle with "cotter pins." The shittier ones had 26 inch tires and Ashtabula cranks. The exotic bikes had cotterless cranks and sew-up tires or 700c clinchers. I remember when Specialized came out with a 27x1 skinny clincher tire in the early 80's.

I think a solid Number 1 is a kidney stone. Supposed to be very painful, i' e never experienced it.

Fearless said...

I built up a one speed, beach style crusier, with 24x3.0 tires. The sidewalls say to inflate to 40 psi (no min pressure) and they have a flame tread pattern. I've ridden on sand, gravel, ashphalt, and grass with some small patches of dirt in places.
I've lived to tell the tale.

Frickus Rungus said...

At lunch today I rode with a tailwind to the library and cat 6'd a fellow xtra-cyclist with a friendly "nice wheels" as I went by. It did wonders for my mood. Riding back to work into the toothy maw of the evil wind was a chore, but at least no pedestrians or grandmothers with walkers passed me at any point on the return trip...

wishiwasmerckx said...

Oh, and I almost forgot. Happy Tu B'shevat.

Drock said...

I love umlauts in a blog, damn snob nailed it today, car bashing, doping, dick stoppers, quiz. I'm thinking you make a non profit to supply bikes to commenters who got your back.

Frickus Rungus said...

wiwm - trees have to pay a tithe? That's harsh...
I think that the almighty Lob makes sea anemone's pay union dues, but, I mean, who can argue with that?

Doc Sarvis said...

Hmmm...
No mention of clever,wise,funny or brave.
A rack and a nice ass are great,but without those other qualities she ain't a keeper

Arizona hillbilly said...

It appears that Lance is planning on attending the 24HOP next weekend.The Drunk Cyclist crew is going to be waiting for him,planning on making him cry. Here's to hoping he has the ball for the merciless heckling headed his way...

Some guy from upstate said...

Why is motorcycle steering head angle degrees from vertical and bicycle steering head angle degrees from horizontal? I am programmed to think smaller number means steeper, but on bike cycles it is the other way around. Can we do something about this please? Moto style makes so much more sense, the angle is away from straight up and down. If you said a bike had no rake, you'd mean straight up and down, which should be zero, not 90.

Also, Snob, do you get royalties for this: http://www.jensonusa.com/Commuter-Apparel/Dhdwear-CAT6-T-Shirt?cs=Gray

If not you should definitely sue.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Some guy from upstate,

I've invented many enduring terms over the years and have transformed the cycling lexicon with my brilliance, but Cat 6 is not my coinage.

--Wildcat Etc.

dancesonpedals said...

Lt Oblivious..

When my father and I went to the ski shop to buy a 10 speed for my hs graduation, I looked at a "France Sport" and a "Gitane". I couldn't see what made the Gitane cost $50 more, so I chose the France Sport. 15 years and dozens of cotter pins later I knew. I took the bike to TOGA, upgraded to a cotterless crank and enjoyed 6 years of cotter free bliss until the frame broke.

Spokey said...


i think the smallest tire i ever used was a 27 1-1/8 which is of course slightly larger than a 28mm. and always had rim brakes. i think. cantis & v-brakes count as rim brakes don't they?

and i've used 700x37 conti tt2000 & descendants since the mid 90s although people always complain they are really 35mm. i will say that is about the limit for my fenders.

and frickus, i can't remember anything older than the early 80s but every bike has had at least a rear rack. don't see where you put all your crap without stowage areas.

KellyAnn Wrongway said...

Anonymous 2:16PM,

"The problem with [...] isn't that he [...]. It's that he lied about it, in every way possible. And many times worse, he trashed his friends when they told the truth. All to win, make money, and maintain appearances. His priorities as a human being are all wrong."

Sounds like POTUS.

Herr Goebbels said...

Lance Boil 236 "In other words, Lance would be great on president Bannon's cabinet'

President Bannon has scheduled the burning of all books in America for the Washington Mall on May 10th. The Million Librarians Protest March is scheduled for the next day.

leroy said...

Rise safe all. Risibly.

Lieutenant Oblivious said...

DOP, my first 10 speed was a Peugeot U08 which was stolen after I had upgraded the plastic Simplex derailleurs to Huret metal ones. After that I had a Dawes Galaxy, slightly better but back to the plastic Simplex derailleurs again. I did a lot of upgrades on the Dawes in the early 80's before I finally sold it for $75 just to get rid of it.

BikeSNOBNYC 8:41 is Fonny said...

Perfect for that alt indoor activity

http://shop.bicycling.com/vanilla-coconut-embrocation-cream/E004913001.html?utm_campaign=Bicycling&utm_source=bicycling.com&utm_medium=newsletter&smartcode=YN_0006957211_0001598220&sha1hashlower=514c1f91cd3704019d60199857d4de565ce2dbd3&md5hash=b38a86a37216a40bceb4790675572684

babble on said...

Apparently refugees fleeing America into Canada are actually a thing now, all the while police raids aimed at certain ethnic households are big down there in Canada's nether regions now, too...? Why does this sound so hauntlingly familiar in a new and improved sort of way??

bad boy of the north said...

Methinks,the next time I get a flat, I'll fix it the way the orange one fixes his tie.with Scotch tape.

RESIST said...

https://www.indivisible.us/indivisible-usa/

Frickus Rungus said...

Spokey,

I think your comment about racks should have directed at (the) Serial Retrogrouch?

But I would like to point out that my rack is huge and magnificent and frequently draws stares.

(Picture an xtracycle abomination)

dancesonpedals said...

Seven years after acquiring the above 10 speed, I switched in a Suntour derailleur
in place of the original Simplex derailleur it came with.

dancesonpedals said...

It didn't make me any faster, just a Fred.

Spokey said...

frickus

i stand corrected

in udder gnus remember snobbie snarked (I realize snobbie and snarked is redundant) a couple years ago about the bicycle umbrellas (I think it was a kickstarling)

There are several bicycle umbrellas for sale at amazonia

gOOD ridDANCE said...


Oh the weather outside is frightful
But the blond bore is so insightful
And now they've got some place to go
Let them go! Let them go! Let them go!

Spokey said...


hope snobbie isn't out today. the cups on the anemometer are just a blur. fraid to look at the monitor to see what the wind speed is.

hey where is the commentariat today? only the 58th post since freyja's day?

Victor Kaminski said...

vsk said ...

Windy windy windy !

Didn't affect my subway train though.

vsk

JLRB said...

Scranus

Anonymous said...

Not to say that Lance wasn't capable of mechanical doping, but Neodymium super magnets of the type that would be needed to make small motors powerful enough to power a relatively heavy bike and rider, along with Lithium-Ion batteries really hadn't reached the state of development to be used effectively during Lances heyday. Anything they might have had would have been prohibitively expensive or so bulky as to be obvious. - Mas

سئو سایت said...

the weather outside is frightful
But the blond bore is so insightful

آسانسور کارگاهی آلیماک said...

thanks