Friday, July 15, 2016

BSNYC Friday Fun Quiz!

It's hot today.

Really hot.

How hot?

This hot:

Fortunately, as a layabout bike blogger I'm able to "curate" my commute.  For example, sometimes I commute into the city, sometimes I commute away from it, and sometimes I just say "fuck it" and stay wherever the hell I am.

Today I picked the second option, and I encountered some deer:

One of them totally Cat 6-ed me:

As you can imagine, sprinting against a deer in the heat is quite exhausting, and so I picked a pleasant spot to rest:

If you can tear your eyes away from my shameful pink-and-green spacer stack you will notice that beneath my saddle is a tool roll from EH Works, whose ad you may have noticed over there in the right-hand margin.  Here's what it looks like unfurled:

And here's a quick inventory of its contents:

--Two (2) inner tubes;
--Tire levers;
--Patch kit;
--Spoke wrench;
--Combination S&S coupler/pedal wrench

Basically it's everything I need to disassemble and reassemble my travel bike on the road--except for a pump (I've got to deflate the tires to fit everything in the travel case), but I'm sure I could easily fit a mini-pump in there too.  Indeed, there's plenty of room left, so perhaps I'll even add a chain tool and some spare links so I'm really covered.  Or perhaps I won't bother, because really, how often do you break a chain?

Either way, it all fits snugly and discreetly under Eric the Chamferer's handiwork:

So there you go.

Speaking of giant toolbags, a friend forwarded me this article, which apparently requires a subscription to read in its entirety--though I'm not sure that matters because if you're anything like me you couldn't bear to do so anyway:

Dave Morin, a tech executive and venture capitalist, posted his time for a recent mountain bike ride to the social networking app Strava and thought little about it. Until, that is, he bumped into a friend, Colin Brumelle, a former Twitter engineering manager and amateur racer who’d seen the Strava posting. “You’re cheating!” cried Mr. Brumelle.

Mr. Morin had beaten Mr. Brumelle’s time up the slopes of nearby Mt. Tamalpais. But to anyone on Strava, it was obvious how Mr. Morin had done it. His bike, as noted in Strava, was a Turbo Levo, a new, $7,500 offering from California-based Specialized. It is equipped with a computerized, electronic motor, which offers a subtle assist with each pedal stroke.

Yeah, it's not really innovation or cheating, it's basically just being a douche.

And now, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz.  As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer.  If you're right you'll rejoice, and if you're wrong you'll see a Pokéfred.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and ride safely.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

1) Pokémon reference Pokémon reference something something something Pokémon reference.


2) The NYPD recently cracked down on ElliptiGO riders for violating the following New York State traffic law:

§ 1232. Riding on bicycles. (a) A person propelling a bicycle shall not ride other than upon or astride a permanent and regular seat attached thereto, nor shall he ride with his feet removed from the pedals.
(b) No bicycle shall be used to carry more persons at one time than the number for which it is designed and equipped.


("Gravel.  So hot right now.")

3) Finally!  Gravel-specific _____:

--Handlebar tape

4) What kind of knot is this?

--A "buntline hitch"
--A "Klemheist knot"
--A "Panties-in-a-Twist"
--Trick question, this is technically a "bend" and not a knot, and anyone who doesn't know the difference is an idiot

5) Holy shit, the Boston Globe printed something nice about bikes!


6) The Lios Nano is:

--The world's douchiest folding bike
--The ultimate Cat 6 assault weapon
--"Onan Soil" spelled backwards (as a commenter pointed out)
--All of the above

7) This bakfiets conversion kit is called:

--The "LIFT"
--The "TROUGH"
--The "Smugifier"
--The "Bakfietsifier"

***Special "Distrupt"-Themed Bonus Video!!!***

The tech companies are gonna disrupt everyone right into the poorhouse.


Wrench Monkey said...

So what?

Ted K. said...

152. Generally speaking, technological control over human behavior will probably not be introduced with a totalitarian intention or even through a conscious desire to restrict human freedom. [28] Each new step in the assertion of control over the human mind will be taken as a rational response to a problem that faces society, such as curing alcoholism, reducing the crime rate or inducing young people to study science and engineering. In many cases there will be a humanitarian justification. For example, when a psychiatrist prescribes an anti-depressant for a depressed patient, he is clearly doing that individual a favor. It would be inhumane to withhold the drug from someone who needs it. When parents send their children to Sylvan Learning Centers to have them manipulated into becoming enthusiastic about their studies, they do so from concern for their children’s welfare. It may be that some of these parents wish that one didn’t have to have specialized training to get a job and that their kid didn’t have to be brainwashed into becoming a computer nerd. But what can they do? They can’t change society, and their child may be unemployable if he doesn’t have certain skills. So they send him to Sylvan.

Anonymous said...


dancesonpedals said...


Anonymous said...


Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

Cinco De Snobbo

balls™ said...

Inappropriate non sequitur!

Anonymous said...

Top 10 running across the line in my clicky shoes Chris "Ricky Bobby" Froome style.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

In the top Scranuses.

N/A said...


Anonymous said...


Victor Kaminski said...

vsk said ...

Just over tennus!

Yes it's hot, but the Co Mute was much better than running like hell to catch the R as in Rarely Train then sitting on a hot bench in soaked clothes watching the train's lanternes rouges fade away into the tunnel. And then passing out.

Sun behind the buildings, not too bad. Even at lunch there's some cloud cova.

On the other hand I broke my strava because I was going too slow.


recumbent conspiracy theorist said...


Chazu said...

Take that tot for a ride this weekend, before he headbutts you in the scranus.

Hot Carl said...

I regularly see the same guy on an ellipti-go, wearing bike shorts. Haven't inspected for a chamois. I wonder where they take them for maintenance/repair.

N/A said...

Wildcat, is your saddle's tightly-cinched pouch the "Nomad" or "Essential" sizeway?

Tool rolls are handy. One trick I learned is that if you're the sort that flips your bike over and perches it upon saddle and handlbars, you can lay the unfurled pouch out and rest your saddle upon it, thus protecting your fine leather scranal-perch from the indignity of mud and muck and other roadway debris.

N/A said...

EH Works should do a collabo with Just Coffee and A Large Well-Known Retailer Of Books to make a tool roll that holds a pound of coffee and 1 oddly-shaped book on biekcycle snark.

N/A said...

Are the tool rolls gravel-ready and Boost-compliant?

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Ah Mr. K it appears you reposted yesterday's comment today. Could you please submit to the board a current comment for our viewing pleasure?


hellbelly said...

The dbag who Strava'ed himself into a KOM on Mt Tam seems to have welded these factions as discussed by the ASS together. Ride on!

McFly said...

A local yokle left his Strava on in his car and killed like 5 KOMs and everyone is losing their minds. Including me.

Anders Hustvedt said...

"(a) A person propelling a bicycle shall not ride other than upon or astride a permanent and regular seat attached thereto, nor shall he ride with his feet removed from the pedals."

If you bought your three-year-old a strider bike, the NYPD will soon be slapping the cuffs on your kid.

BamaPhred said...

Nice Rack!

Thanks Snob

Schisthead said...

Video of people in clipless shoes running.


cdinvb said...

Just so you know, I'm taking a couple of weeks off. Might give the Hoosier tenderloin report. Just depending.

Anonymous said...


Bromptonaut said...

Wahay, my comment made it into the quiz! My 15 minutes of fame has arrived at last.
(I really should have tried to do something more interesting with my life.)

JLRB said...

Loved the Pokemongo Fred video - "driving" his road bike with skinny ties on gravel while saying "You can see my face" - somehow people make money doing videos like that

of course thieves have been waiting at pokemongo spots to snatch phones from people hunting

JLRB said...

and the ube bikedelivery video would have been better on an eliptigo

bad boy of the north said...

Bromptonaut..better 15 minutes of fame here than on a poster at the post office.congrats!

bad boy of the north said...

Okay...guess i hafta go,close your eyes....what's with cold(ahem),cat in the fridge?and how did they get in there?

Anonymous said...

Asphalt is going to be the next hot thing. Special tires will be invented, PSI's will be calibrated. Etc....

bad boy of the north said...

Nuttin' wrong wid dat.....when it's's six cats at home.get to keep em cool...or else they wouldnt cats.

P. Bateman said...

have a good weekend ninjas. good luck hunting the poke's mon

Lieutenant Oblivious said...

I'm away from my bieks this weekend up in America's top hat, but still reading daily! It's a bit cooler up here, temps are like 77.5% of temps in NYC when measured on the same Farenheiser scale.

McFly said...

That's a typical pussy. So cute and furry but it's so close to those damn eggs.

leroy said...

Ride safe all!

Especially if you're in some exotic locale where the indigenous population won't serve caffeine to dogs absent cars .

DB said...

COD McFly 9:25.
Probably COWeek.

JLRB said...

I see what a future Snob test ride

Buy More Now, and... Be Happy said...

Izumi, Pearl o' Wisdom

"When riding on the gravel, you need to have the comfort of a free-ride short combined with the fit of a bib short."



Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

Abandonimg,the biek this weekend and,the susequent,battles with SUV's et al and spending the weekend paddling the kayak inatead. Let's hope I can avoid the beer soaked a hole in the Grady White

Anonymous said...

It's gotta be tons of fun to squeeze your front brake and skid out your front baKe feet wheel. We have hills in merica, so be careful

dop said...


I hit a pothole descending at woo-hoo-minus-thirteen and became a pedestrian.

Spokey said...

condolences to your rim.

ponder the advantages of staying at turtle speed like i do.

bad boy of the north said...

ouch!rim in peace,dop.

jth said...

Many of the Pokemon games consistently featured the bicycle, which remained one of the best ways to travel until later in the game when you could just park your ass on top of Hyundai-gon and command it to fly you around.

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Ziga K said...

Ted K. that's the same post as yesterday! I want chapter 153!