Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Wednesday will leave you feeling clean and fresh!

As you may have heard by now, attendees at Interbike (that's the cycling industry's big annual trade show in Las Vegas) were shocked and appalled when they found a pair of incredibly cheesy socks in their gift bags, and here's an insightful analysis of the situation from the Surly blog:



The scandal has been dubbed "#sockgate," and here are the socks in question, which are destined to wind up hard and crunchy under the bed of your LBS owner's teenage son:


Naturally, sock manufacturers immediately distanced themselves from the controversy:
And the Interbike people sent out a lame apology:
Ha!  That's now how Interbike rolls?!?  Please!  Granted, I've never been to Interbike (mostly because I'm not in the bike industry, but also because I can't stand Las Vegas), but based on the media coverage that's exactly how Interbike rolls.  We've been seeing an endless stream of real-life bike porn from Vegas for years now.  For example, here are some middle school girls posing with a fat bike:


(Seriously, how old are they?)

Here are some of the infamous Interbike "booth babes:"


(Why is the guy behind them wearing a helme(n)t?)



(Classy.)

Sure, I realize this is just one component of Interbike, and that as an industry outsider my impressions are largely formed by what the media bros decide to photograph.  I also realize that, if some two-bit machine shop bro-peration decides to hire a couple of booth babes to attract other bros with baggy shorts and goatees, it doesn't necessarily speak to the intentions of the Interbike organization or the bike industry as a whole.

Still, it seems to me that it's time for the bike industry to make a concerted and collective effort to move Interbike away from a city whose economy depends on the degradation of women and that generally represents the most insipid aspects of American culture.  Seriously, Las Vegas is easily the worst American city I've ever visited--and I've been to Utica!  Leave Vegas to rube gamblers and the drunken bachelorettes and the bros who need a place to grind their boners into strippers before they get married.

So where to hold Interbike?  Well, the obvious answer is some bike-friendly city like Portland, but I'll be damned if I'm going to give those smug bastards the satisfaction.  No, I think Interbike should move to a more deserving city whose charms are a bit less obvious:



To that end I've even designed a logo:


By the way, that's not Cleveland, it's Pittsburgh--like you even noticed.

Or, if you want something more provocative, how about this?


Best of all, you don't have to worry about offensive socks, because here's what Cleveland has planned for 2016:

I've never attended a single Interbike, but I do love the Cleve, so if the show moves there I can assure you I'll be there faster than you can say "river fire."

In the meantime, remember last year's Interbike controversy, "#beergate?"



Well, here's hoping #sockgate and #beergate merge into #HotCarlGate, which will of course involve spectators walloping Cross Vegas competitors with sexist giveaway socks full of human feces.

But yes, I realize that it's not as simple as "Interbike should leave Vegas."  After all, I'm no better in that I've been complaining about New York City for years but I'm still here too.  In fact, I'm sure Interbike is still in Vegas for the same reason I'm still in New York City: all our crap is here and our livelihoods depend on it.  (I'm not referring to the blogging; I also happen to own 37 Ray's Original Pizzerias.)  Plus, how could I survive without the protection of the NYPD?


If the crash occurred as reported, Cioffi and the other woman were cycling with the right of way when they were hit. But anonymous NYPD sources blamed the victims for their injuries while exculpating the unnamed driver, telling the Post the cyclists were not wearing helmets — which is legal — and that “police did not believe there was any immediate signs [sic] of criminality.”

Let's all pause to once again reflect on the fact that "Bicycling" magazine calls this America's Best Bike City.

I hope they're all having fun at Interbike.

Not only that, but while one "anonymous NYPD source" was blaming the victim (for not wearing a helme(n)t when A FUCKING RUNAWAY BOAT CRUSHED HER TO DEATH), another was saying the trailer wasn't properly secured:

Sources close to the investigation said the hitch had been modified in some way.

“It came unhitched from the trailer, it wasn’t properly secured,” a police source said.

When it comes to the NYPD and investigating crashes the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing.  However, both hands seem to work in perfect concert when they're tackling the shit out of a retired tennis pro.

I'd say this is enough to get me to give up on Vision Zero, but the truth is I pulled the plug on that bullshit about 200 legalized murders ago.

Speaking of drawing blood, apparently blood analysis is the new Fredly Frontier:



Mangar dislikes the “nebulous” term overtraining but believes a cyclist in the 35-40-year-old age bracket with a stressful job who does four sessions of high-intensity or sweet-spot training either in road racing or time trialling is in danger of some form of burnout.

Actually, the cyclist in the "25-40-year-old age bracket with a stressful job" who spends a bunch of time and energy "training" is most in danger of being a gigantic Fred.  Here's an idea: when you're feeling tired and burnt out, instead of analyzing your blood, why not just stay off your stupid plastic bike for awhile?  And stop "training" while you're at it.  Training is something you do to prepare for the Olympics.  When you're "competing" in amateur bike race where you might win $14 and a pair of irregular arm warmers, you're not training, you're riding a bike.

Still, it's pretty clear that blood analysis is going to be the new power meter, because there's even an article in "Bicycling" about it:


This past spring, I had the opportunity to ride the Tour of California route in its entirety with GU Energy Labs. While we weren’t going to be “racing” per se, we also weren’t lollygagging or riding recreationally. The goal was to see how our bodies responded to the stress of training leading into the Tour; the stress of riding the Tour as hard as we could; and how we recovered afterward. To that end, GU paired with the health analytics company InsideTracker to do a series of blood draws in the weeks leading up to and then after the Tour. The company scanned our blood for 30 different biomarkers important for energy and metabolism, muscle and bone health, inflammation, strength, endurance, and general health.

Sounds fun.


Lastly, via Twitter, and then here, and finally Kickstarter, here's the dumbest thing I've seen since at least Monday:

 

A system that continuously drips oil on your chain as you ride?

Someone would like to have a word with you:


("Hey, you-a steal my idea!")

See you at Interbike, Cipo.

138 comments:

Two Claws said...

Two claws up!

herzogone said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

this was just too pointlessly easy. where's that audience gone?

Roille K said...

What we see is that in his blabla of self-determination he at least has a chance to get all up in the power process; we shall see later on in this here treatise how modren industerl society underminds and indeed fucks up pretty well, this process.

babble on said...

Wednesday!! Where's the weed???

misster-PISSTA aka eriK Zo said...

Phil wood.and maybe mountain goat ? Made a constant lube system for mtbks in the 80's..as the whell turns.things are reinvented

Anonymous said...

Doh!!! Read the post and now I'm off the podium. I could have been a contender.

Anonymous said...

I don't think boob size should be a trade show factor. I remember a female bike blogger/social activist/sexologist, who lives N of the NSA Border, putting out a photo caption that said "I always wanted a nice rack".

Serial Retrogrouch said...

topus tenus!

Anonymous said...

Second place grabbed by a "Comment Deleted". Must have got there via PED's and felt guilty after the fact.

Marty said...

Hey you steal my podium

Anonymous said...

scranarhoids

Anonymous said...

#hotcarlgate

A messy situation...

babble on said...

Ok, so you're going to continually drop oil on my chain as I ride, but who is going to run alongside the bike wiping the chain clean as it oils, hmm??? Who is going to get rid of all of that nasty excess oil which will attract the grime that will shorten my components' lifespan??! Hmm?? Ha. I'll need a little Cipo to give it a good rub.

S-G0 said...

Read it all and still made the top ten?? Your blog definitely has jumped the shark, wildcat!

Schisthead said...

Goes back a little further than that.
There were continuous oil systems in bikes from the early 1900's.

Schisthead said...

Babble: The smart ones had a full chain case--fully enclosed system with no chain cleaning or wiping required--till you change the oil, of course.

BamaPhred said...

Scranus

Lancelot Hogben said...

Continuous chain lubrication? Such innovation! I hope 1897 doesn't call and ask for its idea back:

http://www.historywebsite.co.uk/Museum/Transport/bicycles/Sunbeam.htm

Freddy Murcks said...

I am entering a plea that we replace #RecumBabe with #BoothBabes. Silicone-based chain lubes and silicone-based breasts. It's a natural fit for any bike blog.

Bob Patterson said...

Well, it is obvious. Cyclists are sex obsessed and have a strong death wish. Why else would they ride in front of innocent motorists? BAH!

DB said...

I place Rome, NY in the running for future Interbikes.
Cipo will be there for sure.

Utica. Home of Utica Club beer? Is that still around?

Bob Patterson said...

Freddy Murcks - Don't forget silicone sex lube. It really lasts.

CommieCanuck said...

Sex socks sell.

Cosmopolitan (the New Yorker of Florida)is being pulled off shelves due to a pornographic cover that shows far too much silicone for Christian tastes.
Interbike should have just put a nice semi-automatic in every SWAG bag. Not loaded of course, you have to go to the booths for ammunition.

The Scottoiler is a product of the Canadian government, we have 10 trillion litres of tar oil no one wants, so we invested in this technology, plus an oil-based infant formula and red dinner wine.

Freddy Murcks said...

Bob Patterson - I prefer the natural sex lubes that the female body produces in response to arousal.

Anonymous said...

Wildcat,

As a Utica College alum, I take extreme umbrage at your mention of the crown jewel of Central New York. Where else can you guzzle $1.75 cans of Utica Club at a takeout place while waiting for your order of 30 wings and some strange, rectangular, sauce-on-top pizza?



dop said...

DB-

I made a backgammon set 40years ago, with one team made of Utica Club bottle tops, against Molson Golden Ale lids. (UC v MGA) I grew up outside Schenectady. It was the local beer & tough to argue over.

I can't see how WRM would love Cleveland (Lake Erie) but Hate Utica (Erie Canal).

Still, for Interbike I agree. Cleveland Rocks.

Ted K. said...

"What we see is that in his blabla of self-determination he at least has a chance to get all up in the power process; we shall see later on in this here treatise how modren industerl society underminds and indeed fucks up pretty well, this process."

The robot trap has upped its game and is currently undermining the bot auto posting process. May need to go back to manually posting...

shining trapezoid said...

How the fuck to pigs live with themselves?

herzogone said...

Anon 11:50 AM, I deleted my second place comment because I quickly regretted my hackneyed "Podium!" declaration. I have never tested positive for PEDs and I must be the most-tested blog commenter on the planet.

babble on said...

You guys are on the ball this morning - thanks for the history lesson. :)

Re the Trade show and A Nice Rack? See here's the thing, and sorry, but it's can of worm times. Of course I'd like a nice rack. The human body is beautiful, and big round breasts are synonymous with comfort, succour. It's primal. And yes. I am pro sex. It's just wrong that our kids grow up steeped in brutality, violence and murder in all its graphic detail. Your average boy graduates highschool having seen murder between tens of thousands and millions of times, depending on his gaming history, while he has no idea how to perform cunilingus properly, nor how to bring a woman to orgasm during the sacred, essential act of making love. It's madness. That the sight of a naked breast still has the capacity to stun is beyond the absurd.
Any woman who has breastfed a baby can tell you that it's just wrong that a man, whose nipples have no real function in the world whatsoever, should be allowed to go topless while she can't. It points to the heart of what is wrong with our world today, and that is that women are chattel, the property of men, deemed lesser somehow, by the patriarchs who seek to use, to control them. Little girls are taught from day one that they are valued for their beauty, for their compassion and care-taking, for denying themselves in service to others. If only we taught our boys the same way, and if only we empowered our girls the way we emower our boys.

How did we get here? Fucking religion, that's how. Children are placed under the direction of spiritual leaders who teach them to deny thier own divine sexual urges, to suppress, judge, and condemn them as wrong -evil even!- and in so doing they twist the minds of millions, billions of people. It's no accident that gang rapes happen most in places of strict religious fundamentalism, Christian and Muslim alike. Here in the west, we look down our noses at what happens in places like India, but we have no right to claim any kind of superiority. This IS a rape culture; rape happens here All. Of. The. Time. ... and it happens in all sorts of places... on campuses, for example. And in all sorts of institutions. Canada's House of Commons, for example. And in the military. It happens everywhere. I haven't met a single woman who has reached maturity without experiencing some form of sexual violence. Not. One.

Just because I am pro sex doesnt' mean I am pro porn, and it doesnt' mean that I am ok with using young girls' bodies to make a few old men rich.

David St. Hubbins said...

Hello, Cleveland!

James said...


Testify!!

DB said...

Ah, The Mohawk Valley.
Utica Club, Genesee, Carlings. Good times.
Spent four years in Greater Syracuse Region.
11% sunshine per year.

I'm on board with Cleveland.
Why not?

JLRB said...

I am with you on the anti-porn/anti-rape stuff, but My nipples serve a purpose. No they do not feed anyone; nobody wants to see them; but without them I'd look funny.

babble on said...

Actually, it's quite precient, Snobberdoodle. Cleaveland, America's land of the Vagina, would be the perfect pendulum swing away from Vegas. Sign me up. :)

JLRB said...

Imagine Zero Vision

See nothing; say something stupid

I hate being passed by trailers even more now.

Poor kid and her family ...

babble on said...

JLRB - well, yes. I stand corrected. And apparently a man CAN breastfeed if he gets all hormonal with a newborn, too.

JLRB said...

So the socks are not so bad - cartoonish - sort of like naked lady mud flaps for a bikecyclister - I wouldn't wear them, but wtf - leave it to the media to make a big deal out of a silly foot product when Vegas is happening all around them.

voice_of_un_reason said...

Babs,

That kind of good sense automatically means you are a terrist. Report yourself for retraining. Lease a Hyundai to get to the retraining center.

BTW, Interbike is EXACTLY that kind of show.

dop said...

I think those ladies were demonstrating Specialized Crabon in there ginormous enhanced boobs.

Anonymous said...

When's your rant on the NYPD coming babble-bitch?

DEATH said...

I DON"T CHOOSE...I'M JUST ALONG FOR THE RIDE SO TO SPEAK...THERE I WAS RIDING IN THE BOAT ON THE TRAILOR, RELAXING IN THE SUMMER BREEZE & ALL OF A SUDDEN I'M BACK AT WORK

Roille Figners said...

I spy with my little eye: A sentient boat trailer!

And also, a dong: snicker snicker! What are we, just sex objects?

I've drunk my share of Utica Club and Jenny Cream, and also Genesee Cream Ale.

Ted K - you know it's an arms race... the hacker vs. the hackee. Just like mechanical engineers (ever-better catapults/cannons/guns/projectiles/deliveries) vs. structural engineers (ever-better ramparts/castles/keeps/bastions/bunkers).

Anonymous said...

Las Vegas because it's cheap to get to. Every airport in the country has a flight to vegas. And in the bike world when you work in a shop the only bone you get is to get to go to interbike simply through the fact that you have a job at a shop.

trama said...

WCRM,
Interbiek in the late 90's makes recent titillatory offal seem like Church Chat. Ask around. Things are getting better. They couldn't get any worse is what I mean.

popcorn

Nelson Queralta said...

Chain lubbing system? Really. We're all so , so , so doomed mann....

Roille Figners said...

Hmm I guess this is a bad time to mention that I'm on top of Babs. Or maybe not. It's more in a natural sexway, not the rapey sexway.

CommieCanuck said...

Male nipples (mipples) are property of the phone company for future feature updates, call forwarding, call waiting or some such thing.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Wow, attacks on Vegas and religious suppression of sex. It takes a substantial amount of willpower to stay on the sidelines and not be drawn into the debate on those topics.

Vegas is an adult Disneyland, which serves its purpose, and serves it well. Snob may hate it, and G-d knows there is plenty to hate, but over 40 million visitors a year heartily disagree with him. Besides, a half-mile off the strip is an actual city with some of the nation's best cycling available year-round due to the mild winters and only 4" of rain annually.

As for sex and religion, sex yeah, religious suppression, boo. In Judaism, there are lots of hang-ups, but it is actually considered a double mitzvah (good deed) to make love on the Sabbath.

wishiwasmerckx said...

...also, having attended Interbike frequently, I can attest that using cheesecake to sell bike merchandise there is a lot less common than you think. The sad truth is that most attendees get a chubby just geeking out over the merchandise even without a silicone-enhanced bosom in a low-cut top to draw them into the booth. A shiny component or a decal-ed deep dish carbon fiber wheelset is all that is required to draw the boys to the yard.

babble on said...

Wiwm - nice. I like that bit about the double mitzvah. Truth is the best way to keep yer body, mind and relationship strong is to do it every day. And seriously. We could all do with more of our body's Love Drug floating around.

More than that, these bodies need plenty of non-sexual touches every day. I know this beautiful young (under thirty) Swede with tats and a fashion forward hair cut; he wears metal (you know, the music) paraphernalia and prefers his utility kilts over trousers - especially on the bike he rides around town. He looks seriously hard ass when you first meet him, but he hugs everyone. Everyone. He is kind, he's touchy-feely. He's beautiful, really. Beautiful. And somehow he manages to create harmony wherever he goes, despite his edgy appearance. It's lovely to see the way people who know him always cheer up (you can physically see it - they grin and they stand taller as they prepare for his legendary hugs) soon as they see him.

I wish more people were "switched on" the way he is. Our bodies are a bio-chemical, electromagnetic soup that just naturally 'lightens up' when you treat them right.

Peter Power said...

babble, the penis is the problem. No penis, no power, no male-dominated society. But no penis, no humanity. Females are the best of the human species, but no penis--no power.

DB said...

Everyone in California head for Cleveland immediately!
Fires, 2.5 inches of rain in downtown LA yesterday and earthquake in Big Bear today.
It's a sign.

babble on said...

Pete. It ain't necessarily so, and certainly not biologically speaking.
You only need one penis to seed a bunch of new peeps; wombs are harder to come by and are far more essential to the process of creation. Never mind boobies, the fount of all goodness, of life itself.

babble on said...

The real power is in the boobie. THAT's why priests are so scared of them.

Anonymous said...

how about Chicago for Interbike? It's in the middle of the country so easy to get to from both coasts. It's also an actual city rather than a theme park for depraved morons with questionable tastes. I vote for Chicago not that I have any plan to go to Interbike. I exceed sausage-fest RDA on this blog.

janinedm said...

JLRB, let's get away from the content on the socks and just take a look at who it's for. Do you see a woman, outside of homelessness of house painting wearing them? You might be able to dredge up a burlesque performer or a hipster ironic lesbian but it's going to be rare. So who is it for then? Men. And putting it in the bag says the bags for men. If the bag is for men, then is Interbike for men? Well, that's not exactly welcoming. It's more like saying you are welcome at this event for men. Women specific bikes and saddles (which are bullshit) aside, there's no reason you needed anything gender specific in the bag. If I got that bag I would not be so offended by butts -- I've seen butts before -- but I'd be saddened by the message at a vulnerable moment when I'm already at Interlake instead of doing literally anything else. cleaning gutters > interbike

Anonymous said...

Dear Las Vegas,

We'll trade you the RNC if you give us Interbike.

Kisses,

Cleveland

dop said...

Hey Bikesnob...don't you think Cleveland looks an awful lot like Pittsburgh in that logo for Ibike 2016?

dop said...

Nevermind...I just read the caption...I only look at the pictures

leroy said...

My dog insists that we must protest body objectification in the bike industry.

He got me a neon green mankini, Interbike Booth Boob gig, and a bus ticket to Vegas.

He assures me there will be plenty of time to shave my back when I get there.

I told him I didn't understand the "we" part of his protest.

And he can wear the mankini. It's not like he'd have to give up walking around in pants.

N/A said...

It takes a fair bit of negligence to get a trailer to depart from it's towing vehicle. There is redundancy built in, if you're doing it properly. The fact that some Fuck-O that couldn't be bothered to not be an asshole to the world around him is not going to jail for murder is making me sad as fuck. It makes my stomach hurt to think of how that young lady died, and what her family is going through. I'm not a mushy type at all, but this one really hit me. I've got a daughter that age. And fuck the helment talk on this. WTF would it have done?



Wolf.

Peter Power said...

babble, you're telling me that if an epidemic of male impotence were to break out, the human population wouldn't be diminished?

babble on said...

Janine - Erudite as always, bless. Yes. ++ :)

N/A said...

its, not it's. Sorry.

BamaPhred said...

Wasn't there a Seinfeld devoted to nipples, nosepicking, and beach cologne?

Frickus Rungus said...

I think we need a mandatory boob helment law. We would achieve both modesty and protection from severe boob trauma. Win, win!

Hoghopper said...

Well, let's not go all Puritan and forget that working interbike in a bikini is making the girls richer than if they spent the same amount of time working at The Gap.

Whatever you can do legally for free, you should be able to do for money. That is all.

babble on said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BamaPhred said...

You're a hoot, Leroy.
Did he give you instructions on how to wear your mankini, ie. Borat style with the waistband hooked over your shoulders?

Anonymous said...

Priests prefer children.

Carlos Caliente said...

Re the Scottoiler - many forms of sanctioned auto racing require vehicles to be equipped with catch cans for all oil vents lest oil is spilled on the track, making it slippery for competitors. If the Scottoiler catches on, a catch can may be required for environmental reasons, don't want oil drippings to besmirch our roads and trails. Also, one guy in the Kickstarter video reminds me of Fat Bastard in the Austin Powers movies.

Re Sockgate - Urban dictionaries' top definitions for hot carl all involve Saran Wrap, tube socks aren't mentioned until the 7th definition!

wishiwasmerckx said...

I have a new all-time favorite quote, courtesy of John Oliver: " And when someone sends you jizz through the mail, it’s time to stop whatever you’re doing."

BikeSnobNYC said...

Hoghopper,

Right. I'm sure that working a trade show in a bikini gives great employment benefits. And of course it's a viable form of employment right up through retirement age.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

wishiwasmerckx said...

Hoghopper paraphrases the Joker: "If you are really good at something, never do it for free."

wishiwasmerckx said...

Actually, the term of art is "Booth Girl," and they are generally hired off of Las Vegas Craigslist.

wishiwasmerckx said...

And also, don't forget, there is no Dana, only Zuul...

CommieCanuck said...

But no penis, no humanity. Females are the best of the human species, but no penis--no power.

So, crabon strapons?
I call bullshit on the best of the species. Canada has a lot of women in high political positions that have proven they can be as inept and corrupt as the old pasty white dudes they replaced. Plus, Margaret Thatcher, the female Donald Trump.

Anonymous said...

Silicone implants = false genetic advertising.

N/A said...

If a girl can shake her ass for a few hours and make a reasonable sum to do so, then good for her. I'll look, and appreciate. So will others.

If, on the other hand, I don't appreciate, then I will not attend such an event. So will others. If enough do not attend, then the events will cease to function. Pretty basic math.

I don't want women to be belittled or treated poorly, don't mistake my comment for that. What I don't agree with is the butthurts being all aggrieved on behalf of others. It's ponderous.

Anonymous said...

I remember attending a bike trade show in new york around 1972 when i was a lowly shop mechanic. I'll never forget Ms. ultra glide (her cables were smooth and slippery). Nice to see things haven't changed much in 40 years.

cycle

Roille Figners said...

janinedm's description of those socks as gender-specific was the magic word that made me realize those are the world's most irrelevant fucking socks. We're here for a bike show! Why is my penis being activated? (Or am I mistaken and there will in fact be reproduction called-for?)

On another note can they stop tacking 'gate on the end of everything? Or I will launch angrygeddon and it will be the fuckyoualypse.

BikeSnobNYC said...

N/A,

Janinedm @2:18pm said it best about the socks.

Unless the event is the AVN awards it's a pretty dumb thing to put in a gift bag.

--Wildcat Etc.

N/A said...

Oh, I thought the socks were definitely a poor decision by somebody. I was just speaking about "booth babes" in general.

JLRB said...

yes they are male oriented and dumb but of all the things to get passionate about on this version of the Snobblog is it really the stupid interbike socks - or maybe ITS THE MURDER

Anonymous said...

Sounds Scotttoiler is ripping off Elijah McCoy who is the maker of "the REAL McCoy."
http://media.aadl.org/documents/large/ypsigleanings/2008-fall_00000005.jpg
Patented July 23 1872.

-Plutarco.

PotbellyJoe said...

Great post, as usual, Snobie Wan,

Why does the victim have her picture in the paper, but not the driver? We need more public shaming not, "This person was on a bike and now they are dead" pictures.

My wife had her Saturn hit by a detached trailer right after we were done buying it from the bank that owned it. The trailer was a worksite generator and weighed almost one ton more than what the F-150 pulling it was rated to tow.

We were compensated for the value of our Orange SUV and the driver and company were allowed to continue to live and tow again.

It's never been clear to me why we have laws ad regulations whe we don't want to enforce them. It's like politicians wrote the laws to appease some nagging individuals in hopes they would go away and then they would never have to enforce them except in cases where they didn't like the people.

Actually, that's probably more true than it should be...

Larry Flint, I mean dop said...

Reading this blog has made me a more sensitive, mindful person.

blogger profile said...

What the fuck is it with NYC, is there no such thing there as criminal negligence? Trailers are required to have safety chains to keep them from escaping should they come unhitched. Trailers don't escape unless the driver is a fuckhead. But when their negligence kills someone, your cops just wipe the powdered sugar off their lips and go on their merry way.

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

That is fucking insane to mention the lack of helmets regarding Cioffi and her companion. No criminality, except that my boat and trailer were incompetently secured (not) to my truck. I wish bad karma to the first Esquire who dares to malign these women by mentioning that they weren't wearing helmets. This story brings me down. A total mindless waste.

ChamoisJuice said...

WTF, most industries, that are dominated by one sex or the other, has advertising that appeals to that particular sex more than the other. Seriously, go to a quilting convention as a dood. You will feel the weight of the matriarchy crushing your testicles and estrogen poisoning making your chest hair fall out and manboobs grow. Not a pleasant place to be as a dooder.

Now, do I go a throw a huge hissy fit, about how the quilting industry needs to be more inclusive of hetero men? That, I do not. I will give them their girl's club and feel relieved that I don't need to hear the stitch and bitch.

Bikes, or really, things with wheels that go fast, are the primarily the domain of men. Certainly, pedal bikes are THE most neutered of all wheeled racing vehicles, because they are slower, less risky and quieter. Go to a car show or moto show. Makes interbike look like the quad at Sarah Lawrence.

COCK SOCK

I was spitting game to some girl who had described herself as "feminist with a sense of humor", so I sez:
How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

And she goes:
ONE!!!! we can do it all by ourselves!!!

I'm all, that's not even a joke. :/

and hit her with mad punchlines:

NONE! Who needs a lightbulb when you have a glass ceiling?
ONE! And there is nothing funny about it!
TWO! One to screw in the lightbulb, and the other to suck my dick!

She txted me a picture of her boobs a few days ago. NOSALE

P. Bateman said...

i''m normally not into socks anymore,and i already did the fun/whimsical/colorful sock colourway years ago before it became stylish, but i would absolutely wear those. hell, i would wear those to a funeral. count me as a fan.

BamaPhred said...

I've had trailers come unhinged from the truck, and the safety chains actually work, I've had the trailer completely disintegrate, safety chains completely useless in that case. These were all frame mounted hitches. I probably have have the old bumper hitches fall off the vehicle, with said safety chains securely hooked to the bumper, which was solidly embedded in the roadway. Negligence? Accident? Criminality? Well, nothing or no one was injured except my pocketbook and my stuff. So I cleaned up the mess and got the hell out of dodge before anyone showed up.

N/A said...

If there's a lesson to be learned by today's comments, it's this: don't ever let BamaPhred haul anything of yours on one of his trailers.

leroy said...

Agree that Janinedm @2:18 framed and explained the issue best.

My dog wanted me to pass along a comment on Mr. ChamoisJuice's intelligence. I declined. There were big words he wouldn't have understood.

P. Bateman said...

i also learned that some people will be very jealous of my titty socks. others wont be as impressed.

i will stand by my sartorial risks and experimentation.

BamaPhred said...

And How! I must admit all of the problems were discovered before I left the premises, except for the empty trailer disintegrating on a forest service road, and that was terrifying. Now to go play in the traffic and annoy the soccer moms.

Anonymous said...

99

100 said...

Suck my socks

Anonymous said...

The owner of Selle San Marco is a Euro scuzzbag? And the owner of Brooks?

Anonymous said...

A nice Oriental lady rear ended my truck a couple years ago, which crumpled the frame down enough to make the hitch useless but didn't skew anything out of alignment so I've been driving it that way ever since and let me tell you, I'M RELIEVED that I don't have to tow a bunch of stupid crap around any more.

Anonymous said...

as a father of two daughters.why the fuck do you need to use women to sell bike parts?

Dooth said...

Don't call me Surly. Please, who's afraid of some sexy socks? "Oh, they objectify women." But it's Vegas! Will the pc police cry foul if Statue of Liberty socks are given out at a NYC Interbike?

Anonymous said...

I vote Interbike Utica 2016. The place has it all, hills, gravel, inexpensive beer, a long history of mob ties and a casino. Plus as someone who grew up there and been to Vegas it fits the bill of nice place to visit but don't want to live there...just like Cleveland or Yonkers.

Anonymous said...

Not afraid of "sexy" socks. Judging by the picture I wouldnt call them that.Just dont understand why we still need to use women in a sexual way to sell shit.I remember going to my local motorcycle shop (harley) and they had half dressed girls trying to promote a sale.I have not been back.I would have stayed and bought something from a real rider.Not dead just do not need window dressing.Just my opinion

Steve Barner said...

A properly hitched trailer does not come loose from the tow vehicle. In the chance that an improperly hitched trailer does, there are two systems designed to keep it from running away. First, there are two chains, called cross-chains, that are supposed to keep the trailer connected to the vehicle, should the hitch fail. Second, all trailers big enough to carry a boat of any significant size are supposed to have brakes and a fail-safe system that applies the brakes if the trailer comes loose. It sounds like both those systems failed, in addition to the hitch. The driver is responsible for his equipment and this is certainly an tragedy caused by negligence. The helmet issue is a red herring. The driver is liable whether the victim is killed or maimed. Even if a helmet might have saved the cyclist's life, which may or may not be true, she still would have been severely injured. Are the police saying that severe injuries would not result in the driver being ticketed, only death while wearing a helmet would result in charges? What we really need are laws that allow police departments to be sued when they do not execute their duties due to their own neglgence or lack of understanding of the law.

Paul Emerson said...

I've been to interbike twice and I don't recall seeing any bicycles.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Steve Barner,

In fiscal year 2014 the City of New York paid $216.9 million in police-related settlements.

Our tax dollars at work.

--Wildcat Etc.

Anonymous said...

Snob, it is time for bed. Those pizzas don't make themselves.

Roille Figners said...

Hey, check out Utica. I think I vote for Utica.

singsong said...

Tow tow tow your boat

maim and kill and blame the victim

just don't give out sexy socks

Dooth said...

If Las Vegas isn't the g-string capital of the world, it has to rank high in g-string per capita. Those socks are hilarious.

Ima Wither said...

Why is everyone complaining about the lesbian socks?

Anonymous said...

They could have depicted Vegas better by putting a failed marriage and a
Defaulted mortgage in the goodie bag

Clyde Stubblefield said...

Blaze of insight at 7:30 AM. Is Wildcat Rock Machine any relation to Sex Machine?

(Stay on the scene, like a ....)

Anonymous said...

are those socks on e-bay yet?i think someone should produce recumbabe socks.

McFly said...

Those socks are indigenous to Green Bay, WI.

leroy said...

Tying Mr. BSNYC's last observation about tax dollars at work and the tacky socks:

This morning's New York Times reports that the city has just paid over $1 million to 3 NYPD officers who were sexually harassed by their lieutenant. The city's lawyers withdrew from representing the lieutenant when details of his conduct were confirmed at the his deposition.

The socks are just tacky, but they and the lieutenant's conduct illustrate a similar problem: some people are too dumb,too tone deaf to be placed in charge of making decisions.

That includes the City. The lieutenant has retired -- most likely with a full pension paid for by us taxpayers.

PLPos0713 said...

I'd wear those socks

Anonymous said...

I'd wear those fake boobs

Gideon said...

Sex sells from Magic Mike XXL to Showgirls to .... most everything else. I know this is neither a political nor philosophical blog - primarily - but this over sensitivity is ridiculous. Peter Sagan pinching a butt is problematic to say the least. Socks with thong bikini images on them does NOT require a trigger warning. From doping to "sexism" the cycling community has no sense or frame to posit their ill informed and reactionary activism. We want to make a statement to the larger world? Make the promotion of women's cycling a priority. Everything else, leave to the academics.

Plus, nobody seems to get upset when I have to spend more money on a decent chamois so my junk won't be clearly seen through it. I really feel like I'm being put on display for the whole world because apparel companies insist on giving me the least bit of coverage - presumably so my man meat could be displayed for the pleasure of all. (tongue - cheek)

dop said...

Gideon, why would I get upset that you fork over extra cash for a decent chamois? I applaud your efforts to make the world a nicer place.

dop said...

That said, any woman who wants to cycle in yoga pants should be free to enjoy the balmy breezes as she rises from the saddle.

Just sayin' said...

Pittsburgh is much better than Cleveland

Anonymous said...

And what's up with that Cleveland sock guy's leg anyway? It looks painful, whatever it is.

jodphoto said...

Hey Snob...

Check this out about tickets for obstructing bike lanes in NYC:
http://www.wnyc.org/story/show-us-your-blocked-bike-lane/

Also, re: The trailer hitch death. Somewhere in the NY MV code there is a statute that a driver is responsible for the safe condition of the vehicle. I got a taillight ticket on a taxi I was driving and that's what the judge told me. So the criminality was assumed, there.

Also, chain oiler? GMAFB.

djconnel said...

Chain luber, 1937: http://classiccycleus.com/home/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/Chain-oiler.jpg

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Apakah Anda mencari sumber internet yang gaya lebih populer, bayi tidur pembibitan, dan balita selimut set? Ketika datang ke keselamatan, sangat penting bahwa anak tidak rentan terhadap mencekik dari banyak, atau bentuk yang salah dari tempat tidur. Penyebab Sudden Death Syndrome Cot aren? T umumnya dikenal namun telah menjadi disarankan tidur bayi dapat cukup faktor penyebabnya. Jika Anda ingin benar-benar aman, dianjurkan bahwa bantal bayi dan selimut cenderung tidak membentuk bagian dari ketika Anda anak Anda (di bawah dua belas bulan) sedang tidur. Semacam ini tidur dapat menyebabkan mati lemas. Ada banyak berbagai pendapat tentang hal ini, dengan banyak ibu yang berbeda memutuskan untuk melarikan diri dari selimut bayi dan bukannya memilih selimut dpt dipakai atau pakaian tidur. Kereta meskipun ini jauh lebih kecil kemungkinannya bahwa bayi akan mati lemas dalam sesuatu yang mereka secara fisik memakai.


Cara terbaik untuk berpakaian anak Anda untuk mendapatkan malam yang dingin bisa menjadi piyama berkaki hangat menggunakan selimut dpt dipakai. Bayi tidur cum piyama one-piece terdiri dari kapas akan menghibur bayi. The berlapis kapas selimut tidur mungkin cukup hangat untuk bayi serta malam musim dingin pembekuan ringan berlapis dpt dipakai selimut selimut mungkin dikenakan di atas piyama footie. Namun, setiap bayi berbeda dari yang lain karena itu harus berpakaian sesuai dengan tubuh dan suhu kamar. Beberapa bayi membutuhkan lapisan lebih sedikit dari yang lain. Dengan kedatangan piyama katun hangat Anda tidak perlu lagi memakai anak Anda terlalu banyak lapisan, yang piyama berkaki bawah selimut dpt dipakai dan bayi harus baik-baik saja. Mereka datang dengan ritsleting terbalik dalam acara yang Anda harus lakukan malam perubahan terlambat.

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