Tuesday, September 22, 2015

All's Fairing in Bikes and War

In the canon of anti-cycling literature, Delia Ephron's "Color Me Blue" is seminal:

We have of course analyzed this classic in great detail, and to be fair she makes some great points, such as:

--She should not have to pay attention when she's walking, because that's not what New York City is about;
--When she doesn't pay attention, bicyclists almost hit her, which isn't fair;
--Citi Bikes are blue, and the only thing less authentically New York City than paying attention is the color blue, even though it's the signature color of our transit system, our police force, and most of our sports teams.

Now, however, some new criticism has come to light regarding the work's most compelling passage, in which Ephron argues that there shouldn't be Citi Bikes because something about rom-coms:

Almost all directors and cinematographers know that, in a movie, the color blue pulls focus. If you place a love scene in front of, say, a blue bench, the audience will look at the bench and not the actors. Our city, if you look around, isn’t a blue city, or wasn’t until the bikes arrived. With the exception of Times Square, where loud clashing colors are the point, our city is browns, grays, greens and brick red.

Oh yeah?  Here's what an expert has to say about that:

"blue pulls focus"??!!  What the F%# are they talking about? I've been a cinematographer for 30 years, and I even wrote THE book on film slang " Strike the Baby and Kill the Blonde- an insider's guide to film slang."

"Pulling focus" only refers specifically to the assistant cameraperson manually dialing the lens barrel in order to follow focus on a moving actor.

Nothing about "blue", nothing about drawing attention...

Trust me, I was the focus puller on "Toxic Avenger".

Dave Knox

Notice how he oh-so-casually name-drops one of the greatest atomic waste mutation-themed exploitation films of the mid-1980s, like it's no big deal:

In the biz, we call that "modesty."

And here's his book:

I plan to gift one to Delia Ephron this holiday season.

In the meantime, now that Citi Bike has launched a new dedicated system exclusively for Christians, perhaps we'll see some more positive press for a change:

Well, at least I'm assuming that's what "Citi Bike JC" means:

Braise the Lard and Holy Luau!


And a very merry "Yum, Kipper!" to my Jewist friends:

(It's the Day of Atonalment, you know.)

Sure, go ahead and close the schools again, it's not like the kids have to learn anything.

Speaking of kids and learning, I've been using my WorkCycles to schlep my human child to school for the three goddamn days it's been open so far during the religious holiday shitshow that is September:

As a local runabout I do prefer this bike to the Big Dummy, partially because of the upright position, but mostly because the shorter wheelbase makes it much easier to park.

(For long trips I'd give the advantage to the Big Dummy, which is decidedly "sportier" since it's basically a regular mountain bike with a giant ass.)

Also, I like to use the footrests as highway pegs on the way back:

It's hard not to feel smug when you're the only parent who uses a bike to take your kid to school, especially when you're bypassing all the triple-parked SUVs.  In fact, because my neighborhood is thick with schools, I pass through three separate school drop-offs in the morning, each one of them an abject clusterfuck due to parental car-dependence.  Granted, as soon as I finish teaching him how to make a weapon from a toothbrush I'll make him take the schoolbus, but in the meantime I'm flying the flag of smugness.

Then I headed to the train station, where you'd think they'd have at least one goddamn bike rack, but you'd be wrong:

I pointed this out to the MTA police officers nearby because I was concerned that if I just locked my bike anywhere they might remove it.  However, they assured me I could simply "use my discretion."  I take this to mean that they've identified it as a terrorist threat, and that they are currently transporting it to a remote location in order to detonate it.

Ironically, there was a bike rack at my destination station, which means it would have been more convenient to simply take the bike on the train with me and lock it up once I got there.

Anyway, if they do blow up my bike I'm sure they'll claim it was security for the Pope's visit, though as I understand it today he's in Washington, DC, where a reader spotted this:

According to said reader, the (unharmed) cyclist was standing nearby, talking on his cellphone and refusing to remove the bike until the police arrived:

I'm going to go ahead and assume that the driver rear-ended him, though I'm sure the police will determine that the cyclist must have backed into him.

Incidentally, the photo comes courtesy of "A. Fred," who also happened to win one of the Classic Cycle-sponsored BSNYC Friday Fun Quiz bonus questions:

See that?  That's what victory looks like.

And this is what a bike condom looks like:

Not only does the bike condom blend seamlessly with your modern decor, but it also prevents your human child from ensnaring himself in the bicycle's workings:

Maybe they should order some for that deadly Citi Bike station that's perilously close to a Manhattan public school.

Frankly, I'm not convinced that a bike condom is the way to go (I simply run a mild electric charge through my bikes to discourage juvenile tampering), though at the very least they could have included some dual functionality by making it double as a fairing:

Still, according to the video, the bike world is abuzz over this velocipedal phrophilactic:

"Velosock has captured the attention of the world's leading bicycle blogs."

That's incredible!  How did they get footage of my office?!?

"And it's been given the stamp of approval from the world's biggest expos."

Translation: they paid the exhibitor fee.

Then again, we probably shouldn't be encouraging Aero-Freds to ride with fairings, as this video in which one such rider collides with a wheelchair clearly illustrates:

The above video came via a reader via Reddit--and this image, which further impugns triathlets, came from Klaus of Alps and Andes via Reddit:

Now you know why they need to have those straws sticking up from their handlebars.


Ted K. said...

61. In primitive societies, physical necessities generally fall into group 2: They can be obtained, but only at the cost of serious effort. But modern society tends to guaranty the physical necessities to everyone [9] in exchange for only minimal effort, hence physical needs are pushed into group 1. (There may be disagreement about whether the effort needed to hold a job is “minimal”; but usually, in lower- to middle- level jobs, whatever effort is required is merely that of OBEDIENCE. You sit or stand where you are told to sit or stand and do what you are told to do in the way you are told to do it. Seldom do you have to exert yourself seriously, and in any case you have hardly any autonomy in work, so that the need for the power process is not well served.)

N/A said...


BamaPhred said...


DB said...

A big Good Luck to New Yorkers this week.
The Pope, United Nations general assembly and Beyoncé concert in Central Park.
Oh! And rats with pizza slices.

leroy said...

Yummy Kippers? Nom must say.

FR8 said...

I have many pictures of FR8 child smugness which I will look back on fondly one day.

Dve - everywhere said...


Glory said...

Cars, the new kickstand.

Anonymous said...

Je suis dans le premier dix

S. Tyler Hendrix said...

top ten

Mister Cheap Shot said...

Amusing, but Jersey City JC is about as far away from Jesus JC as one can get. Jersey City may not be Hell on Earth, but you can see it from there.. In fact CitiBike may not bring salvation, but it will bring a little civilization.

grog said...

My world is blue.

P. Bateman said...

i dont see any titties on those socks. what gives? i thought this year's fall trend was titty socks?

BamaPhred said...

So which days are not holidays. That would be easier. Jeebus is a white man riding a CitiBike? Damn, next thing you know Samson will be slaying cyclists using the jawbone of the Ephron lady. And I trusted my Sunday School teachers. I feel so begrimed.

P. Bateman said...

have given myself a nice case of cyclist palsy this morning. think i need to suck it up and get some spacers and a shorter stem. ugh.

good news is that its going to make masturbation somewhat exotic.

Gideon said...

Yay more citibike. But, why expand it out TO ANOTHER STATE before we bring it to some of our outer boroughs and streets north of 59th? Is citibike ONLY for the central business district? I just dont understand. And, thats why I don't get paid the big bucks.

McFly said...

11. Thou shall not shift properly.

BikeSnobNYC said...


They've also expanded it north of 59th street and into Queens.

As someone who lives in "an outer borough" nowhere near a Citi Bike station the layout makes sense to me. When I take a train into the "central business district" there are Citi Bikes around so I can go about my business. On the other hand there's not much need for them in my residential neighborhood where I've already got my own personal transportation.

--Wildcat Etc.

Anonymous said...

She should not have to pay attention when she's walking, because that's not what New York City is about;

Nice misdirection. She was specifically complaining about a wrong-way cyclist, who placed her at risk BY DANGEROUSLY VIOLATING TRAFFIC LAW.

Pedestrians really shouldn't have to be constantly on the watch for law breaking traffic, regardless of its wheel count.

Nearly got killed the other night myself by a delivery guy flying the wrong way up a quiet one way street, at night, without lights, on an illegal-in-NYC E-bike.

Frankly, I fear outlaw cyclists more than cars, because cars are for the most part where they are supposed to be, and so easy to avoid.

But, perhaps unlike Delia, I'd be quite happy to see more safe and legal cycling in our city...

Grump said...

Great, a Cervelo with a front Rev-X

I shouldn't make fun of that. I still have a set of Rev-X's. I rode them for years, and they never kilt me.
(At least, I don't have a Cervelo)

Spokey said...

I missed ted during my hi-ate-us

Jon Webb said...

Say what you want, but those blue bikes in your photo do grab the attention. They really stand out. But I would think that would make them easier for Ms. Ephron to notice, walking down the street in her rich-daughter-of-a-famous-person haze.

The King of Park Slope said...

A Delia Ephron apologist?


Anonymous said...

So did I, sort of like I would miss a painful scranal carbuncle

Anonymous said...

The big dummy is ""sportier" since it's basically a regular mountain bike with a giant ass". Why does it sound like putting handle bars on a Kardashian.

Brendan said...

Great Schoenberg joke!

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 12;34pm,

Read it again:

As it happens, the bike was going the wrong way and I was crossing against the light.

That’s what New Yorkers do. When we walk, we don’t pay attention to lights.

1) The cyclist is undeniably a dick;

2) However, if you are going to cross against the light you're goddamn right you have to be "constantly on the watch for law breaking traffic." That's how crossing against the light works. You look every which way before you do it.

I laughed at the part about "cars are for the most part where they are supposed to be."

Do we live in the same city?

--Wildcat Etc.

Lexington Steele said...

Handlebars on a Kardashian ass? I can dig it.

Esteemed CommentorDaddoOne said...

WC etc...

Is your human child wearing a helment on these runs?
I have recently taken delivery of a human child...21 years after my first...and I now find myself fence-sitting the helment question....your thoughts?

Anonymous said...

A Delia Ephron apologist?

No, she's clearly a disingenuous opinionator.

But complaining about the dangerous wrong way cyclist was the one thing she got right, and leading off this blog post by attacking that is the kind of underhanded tactic that can only undermine cycling advocacy, which otherwise has so many sound, honest arguments available to make in its favor.

N/A said...

It is my understanding that most of Delia Ephron's work is seminal.

Anonymous said...

I laughed at the part about "cars are for the most part where they are supposed to be."

Perhaps you failed to comprehend the meaning of "for the most part"

Yes, there are occasional articles about an idiot driving on the greenway or running up on the sidewalk or going for a drunken joyride on the LIRR tracks.

These things make the news because they are unusual incidents.

Cyclists being where they aren't supposed to be, or going the wrong way, is an order of magnitude or two more common.

And don't get me started on riding at night without lights. The last car I saw doing that was memorable as it had "NYPD" painted on the side, but in many areas of the city fully half the cyclists are violating the law by not having lights.

Johnny cash said...

I hold my pants up,
With a piece of twine.

If you are mine,
Come pull the twine

Yankee Bike said...

Mr. Rock Machine:

Submitted for your (dis)approval.

Blue_blaster_bells said...


Blue? BLUE?


Your tiffany doesn't mix with iris, doesn't mix with Bleu de France.

WTF?? Where is your colorway sensibility???

Anonymous said...

Someone used the term "tridork" in the comments section of RKP.com last week. Moderator Padraig dogged him hard and told him to play nice or he'd be banned and all his comments deleted. He's missing all the fun, watch this:

Tridork, Tri-dork, or maybe Tri-Dork.

If your main priority when you ride your bike is to get done as soon as possible (i.e. a tridork) so you can change shoes and run, then it should not be surprising that your cycling skills are miserable.

nahmean said...

WRC: "I laughed at the part about "cars are for the most part where they are supposed to be."

Do we live in the same city?"

You can't assume anything! Maybe by "where they're supposed to be" he meant "in a dunkin donuts storefront".

Anonymous said...

i likey wooden bikey

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 1:00pm,

Okay, I won't get you started on the lights, sounds dreadfully boring.

If you don't see cars without lights on, you may live in the same city as me, but you must live in a very different part of the city.

Here are just a few examples of cars that are "not where they're supposed to be" that you will find every second of every day in New York City:

--In the middle of the crosswalk during the "walk" phase
--Idling in bus stops
--Idling in "no standing" zones
--Reversing the entire length of a street for a parking spot (no different than "salmoning")
--Actually salmoning (see it all the time)
--Parked on sidewalk

I could go on. Sure, the Dunkin' Donuts crashes make the news because they're "unusual" (though if you do a search you'll find a driver smashes into a building of some kind in the city pretty damn regularly), but you don't notice all the other run-of-the-mill encroachments simply because you've become inured to them.

Give Delia a smooch for me.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

N/A said...


Freddy Murcks said...

Damn, I love triathletes. No matter how stupid and fredly I become, I will always be better then the trigeeks.

ken e. said...

boom. as usual, a hotbed of debate. here's what side i'm on.

cars are fucked, car drivers behave like (for the most part) fucks, and the auto industry will continue to fuck everything up, i.e.: infrastructure of your quaint (or not) community. just sayin'.

Spokey said...

Yankee Bike at 1:06

The new gear system never quite caught on and little was heard about it in the ensuing years. NordicTrack declared bankruptcy in 1998 and was subsequently purchased by ICON Health & Fitness.

subaru has been using that technology for decades. This explanation also claims Da Vinci grokked it centuries ago.

some good news for a change said...

After years of TransAlt advocacy, inspired by your passion for safe streets...
With more than 15,000 people asking for protected bike lanes in the heart of Manhattan...
Today, Mayor Bill de Blasio announced plans for a protected bike lane on Sixth Avenue from 14th Street to 33rd Street.

Biking is about to get a lot better in Manhattan — a testament to the leadership of the de Blasio administration. As of now, there is no plan to fix dangerous Fifth Avenue, or the rest of Sixth Avenue. But you have seen that your voice can make a difference.

N/A said...

Whoa, Da Vinci drove a Subaru?

Spokey said...

actually he was chauffeured.

Spokey said...

i like driving cars. i like driving bicycles. i don't being in an aeroplane.

perhaps professional help will help?

Spencer said...

I came across This on my ride last evening.

dop said...

Come to the dark side...sign up for a tri...

OK, the initial transition is uber dorky...aging freds with wet asses & frozen legs after 1500 meters in the Hudson try to jump on bikes and clip in...while young freds hammer through the transition zone for no good reason...

it's fun to ride better than 90% of the people in the crowd...draft young women who ride in bathing suits...it's only a thirty second penalty if you're caught../

Best part: you get to race on a highway that's closed to cars

Anonymous said...

Anon 1:00PM not to pile on, but I guess I will.. I would take my chance with a bike versus a car any day. Basic physics. Yes cyclists should follow the law, but the consequences of them not doing so pale in comparison to that of a driver of a speeding fucking 3,000lb hunk of steel. Also, maybe a cyclist running through a light or going the wrong way is "two more common" as a car, but getting maimed or killed by a car versus a bike is about 1,000x "more common"


Guido said...

Da Vinci drove da Subaru all over da place.

Anonymous said...

"She should not have to pay attention when she's walking, because that's not what New York City is about;"

What NYC is about is being a Hedge Fund Manager, making billions and then paying taxes at half the rate of the middle class thanks to the Carried Interest Provision of the tax code.

Anonymous said...

"That’s what New Yorkers do. When we walk, we don’t pay attention to lights."

People do the exact same thing in San Diego. I can't count the number of times I've encountered someone staring at a cell phone who walks down the sidewalk and without even looking or stopping steps off the curb and crosses the street when the light is against them. And it's not even a traffic light for cars, the busy intersections have those pedestrian walk/don't walk signals.

N/A said...

What NYC is about is giving The Naked Cowboy a wedgie, then going to get a slice!

Anonymous said...

You think the blonde like the ridges in the Toxic Avenger's nuclear rod?

Gideon said...

In response:

I understand that they have recently expanded it to the UES and parts of Queens. But I live on the much maligned UWS where blight after blight has fallen upon our collective heads. I know it is coming, which keeps me hoping for better days. While I agree with the argument that residential hoods further from the CBD may not take as great advantage of the bike infrastructure initially, the other half of me (which is reactionary and starts drinking early on weekends) is very upset that another state is getting the goods first! I'm sure there is a good argument to have them in JC; maybe so that the commuters can get to and from the ferry or the train etc. But in the words of Kevin Costner - "if you build it they will come". I hope to see ghosts riding bikes all over Queens/Bronx - staten island? eh... It is hard to see the beloved Queens of my youth, where I blossomed, be so abjectly forgotten. *Shakes fist - starts drinking* Reason means nothing to me right now.

Roille Figners said...

Hey, the way I look at it, if I'm "where I'm supposed to be" i.e. on the sidewalk or in a crosswalk (with the light, as applicable), and someone on a bike wants to run into 250 lbs of me (who will additionally be pissed-off as soon as it happens) I'm pretty sure that is gonna end up being a big problem for THEM. It's a built-in deterrent. And let's also keep in mind, people are trying to get someplace, not go around hitting people. How fast can I get to work on my bike if I strike even a single pedestrian on the way? I believe that trip includes paperwork delays and/or ends in jail. Therefore as a pedestrian I focus on walking predictably in a straight line like a fucking non-retard with some kind of purpose in life, and don't bother getting all "gasp!" and "Oh my stars!" and ruffle my feathers like an old hen whenever a fast-moving object goes by my general vicinity that I don't own.

Anonymous said...

Anon 1:00PM not to pile on, but I guess I will.. I would take my chance with a bike versus a car any day. Basic physics. Yes cyclists should follow the law, but the consequences of them not doing so pale in comparison to that of a driver of a speeding fucking 3,000lb hunk of steel. Also, maybe a cyclist running through a light or going the wrong way is "two more common" as a car, but getting maimed or killed by a car versus a bike is about 1,000x "more common"

I'd agree that in many situations getting hit by a car will do more damage. But not all. And for a moderately aware pedestrian, it may well be less likely to happen, as there are far more cyclists grossly ignoring traffic laws than their are drivers committing comparable location or direction offenses.

Additionally, vehicles don't tend to hug the curb to the same extent that salmon often do, putting them into immediate no-warning-for-either conflict with pedestrians.

But one of the things that makes outlaw cyclists more dangerous is the fact that they are often going drastically faster than cars would be in that situation. Another is illegally having no headlights. And being silently electric (which is also illegal for bikes in the city, though will start to be an issue with cars as well)

A car coming from the direction of the cyclist who nearly hit me would be slowly reversing slowly up a one-way street which bright taillights and perhaps some engine noise. In contrast, the bike who nearly hit me while I was looking in the direction traffic is supposed to come from was riding much faster (an illegal e-bike, effectively an unregistered moped), hugging the edge of the road, on an unlit street with no lighting of his own.

JLRB said...

Can't we all just get along?

BikeSnobNYC said...


I thought Citi Bike was coming to the UWS... I also seem to recall reading that there was much gnashing of teeth over it at the public planning workshops.

I definitely agree there are neighborhoods far outside the "Gentrification Zone" that would work well with bike share, so hopefully it happens eventually.

I'll never see it anywhere near me though. Way too hilly.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

JLRB said...

A fugh it - I'm joining the dog pile on the rabbit

Anon @ 1:00, 3:20 and so on - I think we all get it that you are pissed of about almost getting hit by the eBike driving delivery guy. I don't think anyone cares; I don't think anyone is arguing in favor of salmoning eBikers; I don't think it is in any way similar to Blue-girls trauma; AND I don't think your incident supports all of your other made up statistics about bikes being more dangerous than cars.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 3:20pm,

You're arguing just to argue now. Cars are more dangerous than bikes. It's science. Let it go.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Anonymous said...

I don't think anyone is arguing in favor of salmoning eBikers; I don't think it is in any way similar to Blue-girls trauma;

Then perhaps you only read bike snob's summary and not the article it referred to, as her initial complain was also triggered by a wrong-way cyclist.

It's the sense that there's a "bikers breaking the law aren't really a problem" attitude in the cycling community which gives people who are opposed to bicycling in general their best ammunition.

Attack them when they are wrong; but have the courage to agree with them on the points they are actually right about, because those are things that could be resolved to everyone's benefit.

babble on said...

BWAAAAAAHAHAHA! That's funny, that cars are just where you expect them to be, while we cyclists are just degenerate scofflaws. Give me a fucking break.

Every single day - EVERY day - I see cars running red lights. And buses, too. The buses here in Vancouver have a fucking habit of honking the horn, speeding up and running a red they should by rights stop for, but cars run them all of the time, too. And at least eighty percent of motorists speed. And most of those are speeding at more than just a couple of miles over the speed limit, too. MOST cars roll through stop signs.

Unbelievable. Can't you see?? Most drivers take whichever risks with the Motor Vehicle Act they think they can get away with.

I came within an inch of my life this week when a City of Vancouver white works van gave me the old right hook. It passed me first, too, and as soon as it happened I turned right and followed him, even though my original intent had been to go straight through the lights. It was about eight in the morning, and kept yelling, "Oh, and FUCK YOu, too! FUCK you very much!" at the top of my lungs for three city blocks as he tried to drive away from me, and I doggedly pursued him. Finally he stopped, cracked the passenger window an inch or so, and apologised. He said "I am so sorry. I just didn't see you." To which I replied "You didn't even pretend to look!" He repeated that he was sorry, and I said that sorry isn't good enough, that I have the right to get home to my family safely every night, too, and that as a city employee who is being well paid to drive that fucking van around town, he has a responsibility to LOOK before he turns. Tore a strip up one side and down the other, and he was beet red with embarassment over the crowd my yelling had attracted, so I should think it made a bit of an impression. Somebody made a point of filming the moment, too.

Where they're supposed to be my fucking foot. If motorists were consistently where they were supposed to be, then a millon people wouldn't have died in motor vehicle crashes last year. You, dear anonywillfullyblind @12:34, need your eyes checked.

Li'l Abner said...

I suppose the conversation is about 1st world problems. Here in Murika's scranus, I started dodging a roadkill possum carcass a few months ago. It is on the road scranus, which I euphemistically call a bike lane, and it has gradually desiccated until it is now a pavement pancake, a hazard only slightly less than the steel plates put out to effect road repairs.

Anonymous said...

The buses here in Vancouver

I guess we do actually live in different cities...

N/A said...

Babble, I hope you called him a Fuck-O. I think that's what we're all doing now.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 3:36pm,

She's right cyclists shouldn't salmon. That's why she should have written a column about how cyclists shouldn't salmon, not one about how THERE SHOULDN'T BE CITI BIKE BECAUSE THEY ARE BLUE.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Brake-Pedal Confusion said...

Here in Cali, they go after gyms.

radical.home.economics said...


And that is the difference between Canada and Canada's lower participle.
You can actually shame a municipal employee.

Here, even in the benign northeast, they'll call the coppers if you yell at them for driving like Grand Theft Auto.
And the coppers will chase you down and right hook right in front of you, even with your kid on the back of the tandem.
Getting out of the cop SUV and threatening to cite you for 'interfering with a municipal employee' or whatever the hell he threatened me with.

Just today. In my rural hell hole, even though there's now a bike lane downtown. And who's in it? Coppers parked buying coffee and checking their iPhones. I'd laugh if i wasn't crying. For sure, moving back to NYC is appealing.

JLRB said...

Anon @ 2:36 - I am not reading her fucking article. Did she complain about a salmoning eBiker, which you noted is more dangerous because of: (1) speed; and (2) silence. If not, WTFO.

JLRB said...

3:36 not 2:36

Anonymous said...

It's the "almost." Did anything happen? No.

Roille Figners said...

No, their best & deadliest ammunition is the 40mph 4,000 lb heaps-o-shit they bully us with. Sounds like you just got your feelings hurt and want them acknowledged. Sorry they hurt your feel-bads!

P. Bateman said...

dang. some nice heated "debate" though i can't believe the choice between being hit by a car or dick on a bike is up for debate.

and who is getting smooches from Ephron? i saw something about smooches? i get no love like that from her. just got blued once.

babble on said...

The only reason this heart is still beating is because I took evasive action to avoid being run over by a negligent city worker.
The fact of the matter is that a million people died last year because by and large, motorists don't bother to play by the rules.

P. Bateman said...

also, i wonder if we could take that Revolutionary Bicycle video that @yankeebike shared and just repost to Kickstarter as is. i wonder how much money that concept could raise? i'm guessing $50,000 easily.

N/A said...

I remember when men were men, women didn't like their socks, and OUR DAMN BIKES WEREN'T BLUE!

N/A said...

Can we all just settle down a minute and inspect the straddle cables on our centerpulls?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous 3:36pm,

She's right cyclists shouldn't salmon. That's why she should have written a column about how cyclists shouldn't salmon, not one about how THERE SHOULDN'T BE CITI BIKE BECAUSE THEY ARE BLUE.

Thank you.

dop said...

I got my citibike key a 10 days ago & I haven't used the subway since. I've saved over 20 bucks on the subway & I'm well on the way to recouping the $100 annual fee.

My wife & I work on opposite sides of central park. Until now, to join her after work was a 45 minute walk, 3 trains down to 42 & back, a 20 minute bus or $15 cab ride. Now it's a 15 minute bike ride.


My smarty phone real time app says there are bikes on the UWS, just not above 84th. (a small improvement from 59th)

BamaPhred said...

Delia's alter ego, and she's blue.


This summer I really saw an increase in the number and audacity of E-biking boomers, wobbling between street/sidewalk/crosswalk to suit their preference.

Only thing more annoying on the bike level are THOSE DAMN CYCLE PUBS!!

First world problems, indeed.

P. Bateman said...

you guys have the cycle pubs up there? thought those were getting shut down in a lot of cities so surprised that with NYC's epic red-tapery that those things would be allowed.



Spokey said...

babs at 3:36 PM

several months ago (sometime back in the spring) i started observing stop sign compliance. ignoring the obvious situations where the auto has to stop because someone else is there on a cross road, i've now seen exactly one vehicle actually come to a stop. i've seen a small number of local gov vehicles including police. none have stopped at a stop sign.

almost no one stops for the turn on red unless they have to.

and when a light turns, at least one vehicles goes through when they could have / should have stopped although this one is a judgement call as to whether they could reasonably stop due to how close to the light they might have been.

as for the million deaths i was thinking bullshit. and was amazed when i went to that user curated factoid site and saw a total of 1.2 million for 186 countries. the cannuck land stats actually look pretty good though.

Spokey said...

oh and i like my socks.

and all my bikes are blue if i can count the silver to blue fade.

P. Bateman said...

oh...yeah, that make more sense.

cant spell Ory-gun without un orgy which i think is french for an orgy

bad boy of the north said...

Ms.babble.glad to know that your heart is still beating.now,you have to find that video in order to post it on your home blog or here or both.....

Joseph Lee said...

The "bike backed into the car" comment reminded me of this tale.

My boss got hit by a car early this summer. Some old lady in a full-sized van hit him with the passenger mirror while he was riding on Staten Island. He was thrown off the bike and bounced down the side of the van. He then spent several weeks in the hospital with multiple broken bones, internal injuries, etc ... (he has since pretty much recovered but had a miserable summer). Anyhoo, in her deposition the lady claimed that the cyclist overtook her and struck her mirror, causing him to crash and BREAK OFF THE MIRROR FROM THE VAN. She also said she was traveling 25 mph at the time. WOW - my bass if FAST.

His lawyer, however, loved her story.

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

Cars are where they are supposed to be, which is why we have this headline

"Apparently Drunk" Queens Man Drives Along LIRR Tracks Until Car Catches Fire

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

MTA police arrested a 25-year-old Queens man yesterday after he drove his car along the LIRR tracks for a mile, stopping only after the car hit the third rail and burst into flames.
According to the agency, Ronny Mora was "apparently drunk" when he drove on to the tracks at Borden Avenue in Long Island City just after 11 p.m., continuing his death-defying journey for around three quarters of a mile. Police said he abandoned the car when it began smoldering and, shortly thereafter, became engulfed in flames.
Mora reportedly told LIRR employees he was sorry, but he'd left the car on the tracks. Oopsie!
Service between Penn Station and Jamaica was suspended for around three hours while officials cleaned up Mora's alleged mess. He was charged with unlawful interference with a train and criminal mischief, reckless endangerment, criminal trespassing, driving while intoxicated, reckless driving and leaving the scene of an accident

Holy Roller said...

Sometimes I ask myself "Would Jesus ride a Citi Bike?"

wishiwasmerckx said...

Sometimes I ask myself " Should I clog up the comments section with filler in order to claim the coveted 100th posting while everybody else is busy at Kol Nidre services?"

N/A said...

I will take a pull. Go for the hundo, dude.

JLRB said...


So please for the love of Lob, quit using your 700 lumens blinkie headlight when riding on the MUP

Ernest Scranusway said...

scranuses like white elephants

N/A said...

I will take a pull. Go for the hundo, dude.

Old timer said...

It is unequivocally good to be a cyclist. No doubt. The bike; the ride - joyful. And in Central California, no less! The riding climate here is always…just fine. That stated, as in ALL cycling, there is a persistently mandated “condition”. The condition is: the necessity of paying absolute attention to automotive traffic. Just to stay alive. That sententious poster who wants to indict cyclists for the potential risk they constitute to others. Just. Doesn’t. Get. It. // Thank goodness for BSNYC! Thank goodness for cyclists like Ms. Babble!

Anonymous said...

fyi, some fun drama is happening on the "Copenhagen Wheel" facebook page, and being noticed by not one of the thousands of magazines/websites who loved loved loved their product

David Pearce said...

Dear Snob and Snob Readers,

Did I, or did I not call it (albeit late, on Sept. 22), but I did call it, with my comment at the end of last Friday's Fun Quiz, that Snob's 2013 deconstruction of Delia Ephron's wackadoodle misuse of the term "pulls focus", was, to ostentatiously quote myself:

".... your post on .... Ephron's "Ode to Entitlement / Film Making 101" is a Bike Snob Classic!"

And here you go, in today's post, discussing blue "pulling focus" and finding that Ephron completely misused the slang, for her own disjointed ideas, in a post I knew nothing about before you posted it, you writing your blog today whilst I was writing my gushing but useless comment on last week's Fun Quiz.

I suppose Ephron meant she believes blue is a distracting background for filmmakers, but I'd like to find out if that is actually true or just another Ephron-misnomer.

DB said...

RIP Yogi Berra.
One of a kind.

Lawerence Peter Berra said...

If you don't know where you are going you might end up someplace else.

Yogi Said said...

If you find a fork in the road, take it.

A. Fred aka said...

If you look closely at the bike that aggressively backed into the car minding its way through the bike lane, you can see the seat is turned backwards. This shows:

a) the cycle jockey was one of those dangerous salmoneers ANON warned us about

b) at least the seat post wasn't seized; and/or

3) the cyclist got knocked around hard enough to spin his seat

Yogi the Berra said...

No one goes there anymore. It's too crowded.

Gideon said...

Has everyone moved on to todays comment section?

Anyhow, I'm on 96th which is a couple of blocks short of the new stations. I had no idea they had already installed them. I haven't seen them. And I'm on my Dahon Speed D7 ( I know pretty awesome ryyyeeee) all day every day, pimpin. There don't appear to be any planned stations above the mid 80s tho - atleast according to the CB map. However, I stand very corrected.

Matt said...

Personally, I find that boobs pull focus.

David Pearce said...

I'm with Matt at 3:00 p.m.!

Especially if they are female boobs!

O, would I like to pull focus with a wonderful pair of those!

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Mengganti pembalut atau tikar popok pada dasarnya bantalan persegi panjang yang lembut dilapisi dengan PVC atau polyvinyl chloride, plastik, dan dimanfaatkan untuk meletakkan bayi di saat mengganti popok. Mereka membuat pembersihan mudah dan higienis melalui penyediaan permukaan yang bersih untuk perubahan popok. Namun, PVC adalah non-biodegradable dan memiliki lanjutan telah terhubung ke menyebabkan berbagai penyakit termasuk, asma. Jadi, pilihan apa orangtua alami dan ramah lingkungan memiliki? Belajar tentang berbagai non-PVC mengubah tikar bersama dengan alternatif Anda dapat menggunakan sebagai lawan pad meja ganti.

1. topi bayi rajut adalah ide yang baik untuk jual clodi murah babyland motif all sport hampir semua bayi yang baru lahir. Topi ini datang dalam berbagai gaya dan tema. Dari emblem sepak bola (dan semua olahraga) untuk truk konstruksi untuk laki-laki dan dari bunga dan busur untuk inisial membuat kristal Swarovski bentuk untuk anak perempuan, topi ini adalah beberapa hadiah bayi paling unik yang dapat Anda temukan.

Ada banyak tempat dari mana orang tua alami dapat memilih pad perubahan yang bebas dari PVC. Zoli (memiliki berbagai mengganti popok tikar yang dibuat dari non toxic, PVC-free elastomer termoplastik (TPE) dalam beberapa warna dan datang pada $ 20 masing-masing. Anak Sehat dan Amazon keduanya menawarkan Naturepedic Organik Changing Table Pad. Hal ini Greenguard bersertifikat dan membuat kapas organik yang memiliki sampul tipis food grade, lapisan polyethylene tahan air tidak beracun. Namun, perubahan ini tabel pad mahal dan biaya hampir seratus dolar.

"Selimut listrik" dan "tidur hangat" adalah istilah yang sering digunakan secara bergantian oleh banyak orang, untuk menyebut beberapa meliputi dengan built-in perangkat pemanas yang baik yang dapat ditambahkan ke tubuh seperti selimut biasa atau ditempatkan di tempat tidur sebagai suatu sprei. Namun, tidak seperti "mawar yang berbau seperti manis oleh beberapa nama lain", dua alat bantu ini tidur adalah TIDAK sama.

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