Tuesday, December 9, 2014

The Waffle Defense

So "back in the day" there may have been life on Mars:


Which is the sort of thing that prompts thoughtful questions from the New York Times's sophisticated readership:

LV San Jose, CA 1 hour ago
Is there any possibility that advanced life forms (including humans) existed on Mars and they moved out to earth as Mars became inhabitable? Seems to me it is at least as plausible as life originating from comets.

No.  No there isn't.

All else aside, do you really think it's possible that humans migrated to Earth from Mars yet have never uttered a peep about it since?  Please.  People can't even ride their bikes for an hour without uploading a bunch of data about it, so if interplanetary gentrification were really a thing I can assure you that you'd never heard the end of it from the elderly.


("From Mars we moved!")

Nevertheless, I admit there is a certain elegance to the theory that ages ago we were so advanced we could fly from Mars to Earth, yet we've since devolved to the point that we now make videos asking our fellow humans for fifteen hundred bucks so we can sell them spray bottles containing cleansing foam:



Oh, come on.  Who the hell cleans a Surly anyway?

Meanwhile, I recently received the following request from a reader:

Can you do something funny with this photo from cyclingnews.com?


I'm sorry, I find nothing amusing about one man diligently kneading another man's posterior.  Plus, I was far less amused by the grab-ass than I was by the fact that Ivan Basso apparently still races bicycles.  You'd think that his biological passport would have landed him on the no-fly list years ago.  Remember the time he stole Michael Rasmussen's blood right out of his body for a transfusion, reducing the Dane to an empty sack of translucent skin covered with moles?


("Hey, who took all my blood?")

"I didn't see anything," replies a comparatively flush Ivan Basso:



"In this society, where everything is quick, not many have the courage to take risks, so that they forget their true history,” he explained. “I decided to make a choice to go against the current, to return to the work of my grandparents and my great-grandparents. I'll be a grower of blueberries in my city.”

That's not at all where I thought he was going with that.  I thought he was going to say he was becoming a drug dealer, like his sister Elisa


In any case, I suppose the young guys always have something to learn from the old dogs.  For example, here Sagan marvels at Basso's surprisingly dexterous prehensile buttocks:


They say Basso once fought off an onslaught of Shaolin monks armed with nothing but a fighting stick and some thong underwear:



Amazing.

Speaking of the joke that is professional cycling, for some reason it's news that Alexandre Vinokourov's Astana team is lousy with drugs:


MILAN (VN) — Italy’s most notorious doctor, Michele Ferrari, visited team Astana prior to the 2014 season in which it won the Tour de France with Vincenzo Nibali, according to a new report.

“In November 2013, one year ago, at the team’s first meeting for the 2014 season … a truly special guest arrived in the evening: Michele Ferrari,” reported Italy’s sports daily La Gazzetta dello Sport Monday. “That evening, stationed outside the hotel, investigators photographed Ferrari speaking with some members of the team.”

For his part, Dr. Ferrari (how is he even still a doctor anyway?) has an ironclad alibi, which is that he hasn't been to that particular town since his "epic" 1994 waffle bender:

Ferrari was quick to post a denial on his website, writing, “I feel obliged, albeit very reluctantly, to once again deny the latest MEDIA BULLSH*T with regards to my presence (“during the night”, or even in broad daylight, if you prefer) at the Astana Team Training Camp in Montecatini (I’ve been in that town, if I remember correctly, in 1994 to taste the famous waffles) last year in November.”

Though recent photos suggest otherwise:*



*(Disclamer: This may not be Ferrari.)

Not only that, but a subsequent raid revealed some damning evidence in Ferrari's hotel room:


It's fairly obvious from the blueberry residue that Ferrari is treating Basso as well.

Nevertheless, we should give Astana the benefit of the doubt, since I'm sure their doping culture was eliminated after Johan Bruyneel cleaned house a few years back.  Here's an account from Bruyneel himself:

I never tested positive during my twelve-year pro racing career (during which I won two stages of the Tour and wore the yellow jersey once – as well as rode off a hundred-foot cliff during one of the race's most spectacular crashes). No cyclist has ever tested positive for illegal drugs while riding for my team.

I thought that by changing Astana, I might help to change the sport. I accepted the job, then repopulated the team with trusted staff and riders, including Contador and Leipheimer, and instituted an independent drug-testing program, at a cost of 700,000 USD per year, that lets us conduct our own, internal controls on our athletes.

Ah, yes.  Trust, thy name is Leipheimer--or, more accurately, "Letle Viride:"


At this point, as far as absurdist theater goes, cycling outpaced 1980s wrestling years ago and is now neck-and-kneck with with the cinematic oeuvre of Troma Films:


(Tame in comparison.)

It must suck to be a "journalist" who has to pretend to take the sport seriously.

Lastly, via the Twitter I found myself listening to this story about Australia and its stupid helment law:



And while listening I became intrigued by the awesome vintage helment propaganda song which plays in the background.  Here it is:



My favorite lyric is this one:

"Heroes wear helmets, they never ask why."

Yes, questioning things is for communists and traitors:


Just put a plastic hat on your head and shut up.

123 comments:

Anonymous said...

First

Anonymous said...

blamo

darryl from downundeer said...

i could go a waffle.

i could.

Anonymous said...

Podium from the porcelain podium

Anonymous said...

wheeeeeee!

The Robot Engineer said...

The early bird gets the worm waffle.

agentdetroit said...

i'm going for breakfast now. dutch girl donuts!

agentdetroit said...

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Dutch-Girl-Donuts/180655755313096

McFly said...

That Chastitty Belt looks extremely penetrable.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Top Tennish.

leroy said...

Well this is odd.

I told my dog that clearly there was life on Mars because the Rover was parked in a bike lane.

(And isn't Rover a common canine name? Coincidence? I think not.)

My dog told me to put a tin foil helmet on my head and to shut up.

I forgot to ask why.

What are the odds of that?

JB said...

They found the remnants of a bike on Mars, [whispering] with a fixed-gear hub. The gub'mint is trying to hide this information, obviously.

Christabel Pankhurst said...

That Chastitty Belt looks extremely penetrable.

Assuming you are referring to the belt in the 7th photo, the way it works is when you make an crude comment to the wearer, she takes it off an beats you ass with it. It maintains your chastity.

Uranus Rover said...

There's only going to be 7 planets left when I get done with Uranus.

Anonymous said...

Tonight's feature tag team match will pit Captain Lou and Rowdy Roddy Piper vs the dynamic duo of Rasmussen and Basso. My money is on Amgen. Let the best syringe win.

I'll take Elisa for some rehabilitation.

Anonymous said...

It maintains your chastity.

You mean maintains a boner?

billyhacker said...

Eat margarine. Hormone replacement therapy. Bike helmets.

Anonymous said...

Early Riser . . .

vsk

the Jimboner said...

don't ask why

Spokey said...

top 1 score?

wow now snobbie is posting so early it must be the day before

Anonymous said...

Pro-cycling is at least way funnier than cycling advocacy. Foam clown hats not withstanding.

crosspalms said...

Hey, speaking of waffles, a guy I used to work with wrote this. A good book if you want something non-bicycle-related on the holiday shopping guide. I bet you could waffle a pie plate if you didn't mind the smell of burning plastic.

Spokey said...

disagree with the snobster

My favorite lyric is this one:

     "Heroes wear helmets, they never ask why."

@ :35

yearh snob, not bad but nowhere near as good as my favorite: @ :52

     "Heroes wear helmets . . . ass wipe"

Anonymous said...

Ok, you know the drill;

Find a helment and get the.......

BamaPhred

Yakov, Live from Siberia said...

In Russia, you don't wear helment, helment wears you!

Oh, and questioning things is not for communists. Trust me.

grog said...

Mars is the only planet inhabited by robots. They all wear helments.
MARS BIEK

William Grey Walter said...

"Mars is the only planet inhabited by robots."

There are no robots on Earth? Earth is not longer a planet?

Does not compute.

P. Bateman said...

first: holy god that is a pale, sickly mofo. my god that is just nasty. please Snobbberobber, can you please put disclaimers on such vile content? i'm trying to eat cereal here.

second: basso's sister, while she may be orange and plastic, is also quite okay in my book this morning (wood).

thirdly: Tromeo and Juliet. totally killer.

babble on said...

Yeowza! Look at you snobberdooderdoo! How's that worm?

Yakov - ++ Right?!

I am getting pretty of a certain age-ish now, and I can't for the life of me remember emigrating from Mars, though the term space cadet has been tossed in this general direction a few times... :-/

Freddy Murcks said...

Regarding the pictures of Basso and Rasmussen: professional cyclists may be the most unattractive people in the whole world.

Freddy Murcks said...

The Velo Snooze published an editorial about the Astana situation this morning. http://tinyurl.com/nwhvfks I'd say it was amusing, but it's also extremely boring (as you'd expect). But one of the most amusing this about is the following sentence "One of the elements that makes throwing the book at Astana so compelling is that the sport has at last appeared to be turning a corner in the court of public opinion." I don't know what "court of public opinion" they are talking about, but I don't know anybody with functioning braincells who thinks that cycling has "turn[ed] a corner" and that doping is a thing of the past. Everybody knew that with the passage of criminal doping laws in Western Europe, the former Soviet Union and China would become the new doping frontier. Cyclists are doping as much as ever. The only difference is that they may be taking steps to be slightly less obvious about it than in times past. I.e., they are taking steps to appear less superhuman.

McFly said...

Pro Cycling may not have turned the corner but Pro Triathloning has turned the corner.

I'm horsing around....everyone knows triathlete's cannot turn corners.

Anonymous said...

I'd let Elisa toke my bong....

dop said...

Ever since my subdural hematoma I've been compulsive about wearing a helmet. (I was for years before, but forgot it once, when I threw the bike in the car. The pale white against the grey of my brain is the blood, a triangle indicated by the arrows. It was pretty faint, but this was the follow up CT taken 10 days after the accident.

flank_steak said...

Velonews has a very long history of pretending pro cycling is not a joke in spite of the plain facts of the matter.

The single exception since that site started online was an interview of John Hoberman. Hoberman brilliantly disassembles IOC sports for what they are, thoroughly corrupt.

The IAAF's recent Russian bribery scandal doesn't seem like the story has taken off in the U.S. No one is asking what USATF medal winners pay to never test positive. Similarly, some Jamaican athletes have some explaining to do.

Freddy Murcks said...

Good one, McFly @12:19.

ken e. said...

I only watched a few seconds, but the eighties were awesome! that son of bearclaw pedal shot? segue to someone singing "memories" getting squashed by a fluorescent MTB'er on a ritchey!

BLUE BERY
WAFF LE!!

Anonymous said...

I would buy drugs from elisa basso.

Anonymous said...

Those who want to believe of a human migration from Mars to Earth just can't accept evolution...because to them idea of human origins in Africa is too mind blowing.

Anonymous said...

In a few years we will all be made to feel irresponsible for not wearing a helmet every time we step outside of our house.

flatulence_punctuates_the_still_night_air said...

Dop,

How much did that subdural hematoma cost your insurance company? How about just the CT scan? How long was recuperation?

Now, imagine 10 subdural hematomas because of a dop-like bikecycling accident in the U.S. for one year.

If 5 are eliminated because of helments, how much money is saved? If one is prevented due to helments, it's still smart public policy to promote helments use.


Is wildcat Rockmanstien offering to pay for the next 10 brain injury recoveries?

BikeSnobNYC said...

flatulence,

OH MY GOD IMAGINE! HELMENTS WILL SAVE AMERICA!!!

--Wildcat Rock Machine

PS: Sorry, can't afford to pay for your head injury, too busy paying for all those injured drivers.

ken e. said...

forgot the blinky lights yesterday and rode home in the dark, one car actually yielded the right-of-way, i waved....
that was the exception, for the last month or so i've been cut off (dangerously) every time i rode. every time, literally.

SHUT UP ABOUT HELMETS ALREADY.

ken e. said...

that's funny, all-caps synchronicity.

Fred Nifacent said...

Rasmussen looks like he just escaped from a North Korean "re-education camp". Someone by that guy a cheesburger and a beer.

The Voice of Reason said...

"How much did that subdural hematoma cost your insurance company? How about just the CT scan? How long was recuperation?

First prove a Styrofoam hat reduces head injuries.

The figure out the cost of ALL bicycle injuries as percentage of all the non bicycle injury payments your insurances companies makes.

Then you will have an argument worth listening to.

Freddy Murcks said...

Jesus Christ on a cracker! How did the fookin healment debate flare up again? If you choose to wear a healment, it's your own business. If some other adult person chooses to not wear a healment, it's their business and none of yours. If you see a child not wearing a healment, it's their parent's business and not your business. Give it a rest, people.





domestic ofautin

dop said...

forget I said anything & just read some of babble's scarier Lazer posts

Comment deleted said...

The body one arrives at by being a professional cyclist is the ideal human form. Don't ask why.

Confuscious said...

Confuscious say if do not want head injury then avoid speed bump with slutty girlfriend in car.

leroy said...

As Mr. Bowie once explained:

"Rule Britannia is out of bounds
To my mother, my dog, and clowns
But the film is a saddening bore
'Cause I wrote it
ten times or more...

Is there life on Mars?"

Substitute "Wear a helmet" for "Rule Britannia" and what more needs to be said?

I mean other than Robert Crumb's observation "It's fun to crash in all meat cars!"

Unrelated and gratuitous pro tip since we were talking about waffles: the coffee at the Wafles & Dinges trucks in NYC is great. Find them here .

Just not today. Weather sucks.

Anonymous said...

Where does Ferrari lives?
Lugano, swizerland

Where many top pro riders live (including nibali, contador etc etc.)
Lugano, swizerland

Since day 1, cycling is always been doping.
Football, soccer, baseball, basket, ice skating etc... They all dope someway.

The problem with cycling is amateurs wannabe pro dopers.

dop said...

It all seems so meaningless, now that pugsley's dead

bieks said...

It's all about the filthy lucre. Cyclists wearing helments = alleged savings medical costs. Motorcyclists wearing helments = increased medical costs (because they're not dead). Hence, it's just fine by everyone that motorcyclists go lidless.

Regular guy said...

Those were the hero days, Oakley Pilots, no suspension, no disc brakes. Hell, we were just getting used to "click" shifting.

P. Bateman said...

Bieks - good point. i'm in florida and i don't feel particularly reassured by the idea that a helmut is going to do all that much as i'm zipping around even on a 50cc scooter that hits 45mph much less a real bike at 70mph+.

and thank god for places like florida that still think we're adult enough to make our own choices. now, i will cede the point that many floridians make horrible decisions....but at least its nice to have the choice. sa tah tay.

Anonymous said...

dop, seems you were very lucky with your subdural. it seenms to have bled into the tentorium and you avoided the possibility of the pressure on the brain created when blood collects in a closed space. good for you, if you're going to have a subdural, that's the place to have it!

Old-timer said...

Huh? What? Mars? Uh...I don't remember.

Anonymous said...

Just because I want to kick the hornets nest: As a card carrying member of the Libertarian party, I agree with the notion that the helment should be worn at the discretion of the rider and the government should have little or no say in how I live my life and whether I wear a helment or not. However, since we have a system that now requires me to pay for other peoples health care, and if helments do in fact reduce injury I have every right to to dictate if a helment should be worn. Because...its my money paying for the injuries you sustain.

Have a nice day!

The Voice of Reason said...

"...and if helments do in fact reduce injury..."

The operative word there is "if".

Jan! said...

Great post today, Snob. I love how the blueberries came back in the waffle bit.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 3:26pm,

OK there moneybags.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

dop said...

anon @ 3:26

Good eyes. It was a small bleed, and the blood pooled on the tentorium. (a 'tent' separating the cerebrum from the cerebellum). Since the CT is taken with me supine, the back of my skull is the low point & the blood spread out along the bottom.

dop said...

d'oh...anon at 3:16

not to be confused with John 3:16

"for God so loveth his helment, that he gave his only begotten son a giro"

Scolars in the Greek churchargued for years that Jesus loved to eat Gyros

Spokey said...

anon @ 3:26

call me cynical but i'm skeptical. Ok so I can't make up my mind.

carrying a card or not, a libertarian might be pissing and moaning about having to pay for someone else's healthcare but a libertarian sure as hell wouldn't be advocating more government interference to remedy the situation. now a big government progressive would want to do that.

jes seyin


and dop @ 2:38

thx for reminding how isolated from the human race i've become. i think i went through that whole list and knew 4 or 5 of them. thought another 4 or 5 names sounded familar. well i'll just crawl back in to the cave now.

CommieCanuck said...

Just because I want to kick the hornets nest: As a card carrying member of the Libertarian party, I agree with the notion that the condom should be worn at the discretion of the fuckee and the government should have little or no say in how I live my life and whether I wear a condom or not. However, since we have a system that now requires me to pay for other peoples health care, and if condoms do in fact reduce VD, I have every right to to dictate if a condom should be worn. Because...its my money paying for the injuries you sustain.

CommieCanuck said...

..and y'all should sit in your basement coiled up in bubble wrap until further notice, it's my money paying for your scraped knees and twisted ankles.
Obamadon'tCare.

Anonymous said...

Farty at 1:43 spouts the same vainglorious bullshit helment proponents do here in Australia. No data to back up their claims, just fundamentalist assertions. One imagines they take their cues from their prayer groups.

Listen up, bunnies; after 25 years of Mandatory Helmet Law in Australia, there is still no credible research proving MHL has reduced cycling head injuries or fatalities. There isn't even any coherent data recording the nature of cycling injuries, the number of head injuries or instances where a helmet (or lack thereof) was a factor.

The same method used by evangelist hucksters is deployed by helmet enthusiasts. And like the religious nutjobs there's usually some benefit for the helmet preacher; votes from the anxious and insecure for the politician, profits for the manufacturers and distributors, worshipful respect for the patrician doctor...

A full quarter of a century has passed since MHL was introduced here and in NZ. As testament to the virtues of MHL, it's interesting that in all that time, of all the jurisdictions in all the world, only the happy-go-lucky UAE has followed our example. And they don't skirt around the issue; they state quite explicitly what tne motivation is:


"At least with driving they learn the discipline, whereas with bicycles there is no such thing. I always feel there should be something to teach them the discipline,"

http://www.thenational.ae/uae/road-safety/cyclists-in-the-wars-on-uae-roads#full

I know when it's best to ride wearing a helmet and so do the vast majority of other cyclists. Anecdotes like that which dop has regaled us with, are just that; anecdotes.

If you want to cite a credible example of the efficacy of compulsory helmets, raise the example of 25 years of MHL in Australia -- all those millions of kilometres of lidded riding would surely tell you everything you need to know...

Spokey said...

how can CommieCanuck be a card carrying member of the Libertarian party

Dirty infiltrator!

Spokey said...

how can CommieCanuck be a card carrying member of the Libertarian party

Dirty infiltrator!

dop said...

the use of y'all is a dead giveaway...CC is from the South of Canada

Spokey said...

how can spokey press the enter key once and double post?

Anonymous said...

Isn't it about now that someone gets butt hurt and quits the blog? It's past 5 o'clock somewhere, or do I even need an excuse to drink?

BamaPhred

Anonymous said...

If you think that helmet ad (by my state government) was a bit eighties, the federal government also gave us a Tron-like helmet ad around the same time: http://youtu.be/slQqJBdlDbU

Grump said...

Even though I always wear a helment, and have only landed on my head once in the last 30 years, I don't give a rat's ass if others wear them (as long as I'm not riding with them). The way I see it, if a Fred gets his head squished, it's one less Fred in the world.
.

Jefe said...

"I thought that by changing Astana, I might help to change the sport. I accepted the job, then repopulated the team with trusted staff and riders, including Contador and Leipheimer, and instituted an independent drug-testing program, at a cost of 700,000 USD per year, that lets us conduct our own, internal controls on our athletes."

What about that Armstrong guy?

BikeSnobNYC said...

Grump,

We don't want to ride with you either.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Anonymous said...

anon 4:32,

Oh dear, that's Molly Meldrum in that ad; he suffered a serious brain injury when he fell off a ladder in his house.

It should be illegal to climb a ladder without wear a helmet!

Anonymous said...

Interplanetary gentrification, Pro cycling passing pro wrestling for absurbist theater, Elisa, and we are stuck on helments? I'm pretty sure Elisa can cure ED by the proper application of a helment, if you know what I mean, and I think you do.

P. Bateman said...

it is interesting the range of comments or the direction they'll take on any given day here in Snobberland

JLRB said...

We travelled from Mars - nobody but Arnold swatzenegger has any recall of the events

Philly Bicycle Journal said...

Am I the only one commenting that the Australian ER doctor is named "Dr. Ding"? Also whats wrong with Hero's Wear Helmets" adio? It does not seem to be working.

Card Carrying Libertarian said...

WCRM and Spokey:
What in essence I am trying to say, although not eloquently, is if we want government out of our lives, it must be all the way out. I am not advocating for more government interference, what I am pointing out is if you want government, which is you, me and our neighbors (since that is where government gets its money from) to pay for things, there will be stipulations to receiving all those "free" government services (healthcare, etc). Uninformed elected idiots write these dopey laws and regulations to try and mitigate the cost to the taxpayer, line their own pockets, and make themselves look like they "care" and "feel our pain" so they get re-elected. If someone does not want to wear a helment, I personally do not care, but when the hospital bills the guy who landed on his dome and he cannot pay, you, me and the rest of us suffer financially, or from a lack of care since the hospitals can't collect for services rendered. I would write the law to state "no foam hat you pay your own medical bills". Leave the choice to them.

We, as taxpaying members of this glorious society, are all da money bags.


Peter G said...

Wow, all somebody has to do is say the word and all helment breaks loose!

Anonymous said...

Helments. This
BamaPhred

wishiwasmerckx said...

BSNYC, can you please activate the blogsphere function which, upon detection of the word "libertarian," the comment is auto-deleted?

If you think that cyclists are a smug, tedious and insufferable lot, try on the libertarians for size. We are pikers by comparison.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Card Carrying Libertarian,

Thanks for the 100% logic-free comment.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Spokey said...

wiwm

not gonna help. most of us can't spell liberacetarian.

card carring

it's still a bad idea to treat a bad idea with another bad idea.

Spokey said...

well gotta go do some tour de basement. just don't tell snobbie.

shhhh but i ride the mag w/o a healment. just don't tell card carry.

then it's off to shots land. maybe some vodka and diet coke. just don't tell babs about that one.

and pls, pls, pls don't tell that mutt about any of this

dop said...

I was going to make a chicken salad sandwich, but we're out of Helment's Mayonaise

Holy Roller said...

Would Jesus wear a helmet? Probably not because the Son of God had great hair and I don't think the Holy Spirit has the wherewithal to deal with helmethead. Sinners like you lot are not in the same league as the Messiah and will surely die and go to Hell if you forsake the 'Plastic Safety Crown of Salvation' when you go for a ride. Amen.

You're screwed if you ride a bike said...

Australia is proof positive that helments are 100% effective at avoiding helment fines. A whole generation of fatties who never rode a bike as they refused to wear a dork hat. Lovely bunch of whinging arseholes who bleat on about registering cyclists. Where the fuck did the dumb hat originate from?

And this ad just about sums up how fucked up riding a bicycle in Australia. Helment laws certainly helped to fuck it up.

Dr Michael "Hysteria" Dinh said...

Donnison said it was a 40 quid fine? WTF? No the reporter is a fool. That won't stop the fuckers from riding bicycles. It is a $153 fine.

*Dinh should go look at the wards full of diabetes and heart disease patients before he does his fucking scare mongering shite.

Arizona Hillbilly said...

I rode my bike in Australia. The cops told me I had to wear a healment. I told'm it was too fuckin' sunny an' hot. They went away...They looked kinda sad too

95 said...

95

Spokey said...

where oh where

Spokey said...

is that

Spokey said...

little

Spokey said...

dop, jlrb, bama etc

Spokey said...

gone

apparently not to the century finish sprint

McFly said...

Mars Rover

Mars Rover

Let Humans Come Over

[Mars Rover]....."no"

ce said...

Highway to the Danger Zone
Ride into the Danger Zone
Ba Dum Ba Da, Dum Ba Da

babble on said...

Geez, a girl goes for a ride under a suckerhole in the middle of a massive pineapple express, and all libertarian hell breaks loose.

Um, and I saw that, Spokey. You should know that I am an expert in spankings.

Just sayin'...


Spokey said...

wow

all i have to do for babas spankings is to eat aspartame? a little early in the morning, but 2 diet cokes coming right up.



Anonymous said...

I quit the sweet-n-low addiction and took up the stevia/truvia habit. At least I can feel smug for a while.

The B-Phred

Dark Helmet said...

LUDICROUS SPEED, GO!!!!!

Spokey said...

i use stevia on the rare occasion i sweeten my coffee (never sweeten tea). but until babs includes stevia in her spanking regimen, i'll have to stick to those diet cokes.

I do keep some variety of this stuff for guests so i think i can quickly switch carcinogens to cover my spankings.

CommieCanuck said...

Wait Libertarian, that's the group who supports Joe Lieberman, right?
Anyway, get off my roads my tax money paid for.

crosspalms said...

Spokey,
I'm a big-government progressive type, but my feeling is that the spankings you may or may not get from Babs are none of my (or my big government's) business. Likewise what you choose to ingest. As far as helmets, I usually wear one, but until there's better data on cyclist accidents, how we get hurt and if anything (like helmets) reduces injuries, I don't think requiring people to wear them does much.

OK, done with soapbox, all yours (but not that card-carrying libertarian guy -- he can buy his own soapbox).

crosspalms said...

Non-soapbox comment, just noticed this. You and I are the job-creators, Spokey! And all the rest of you, too.

bieks said...

Ooh, new kickstarter idea. A helment called The Libertarian. Maybe the hilpsters will think it's ironic and fund it into the stratosphere.

babble on said...

I tweeted that little gem yesterday, Crosspalms, feeling smug after my week long argument with one of the founders of Greenpeace who has turned to the dark side.

If only our fossil of a prime minister would figure it out.


Spokey said...

hmmm

crosspalms is a big gov progressive who wants the government out of our personal business

and card carry is a libertarian who wants more gov control

oh mightly LOB who has snobbie wrought!


and i'm thinking of creating more 'merican jobs. not sure yet, but i'm toying with going to philly now that snobbie has left and talking to mr bilenky.

babble on said...

End of days, Spokey, it's the end of days... the world is all ass backwards and inside out, and the four horsemen of the alpacalips will surely come riding bicycles.

Spokey said...

wouldn't that make them the four bicyclists of the alpaca lips?

if we're lucky they're tri dork riding crabon and will go down on that last corner impaling themselves on the crabon shards from their exploding steeds.

Anonymous said...

All I ever wanted was enuf assfault
road scranus to get out of the traveled hi-way lane, and the gub-mint came and gouged out divots to warn the drivers they were fixin to runitinnadeetch. Told me it wuz fer my own good. Failed to see the logick. Wunderin if this land was made fer you-n-me?
BamaPhred

Anonymous said...

vsk said ...

Happy dreary post Noreaster day!

Ms. Babble are youze guyze up there sposed to get part of Northern Cali's Storm of the Decade?

vsk

Freddy Murcks said...

Will the title of today's post, which is late, be "The Wednesday Defense"?






1805-1 urchord

babble on said...

vsk - seems we're in the middle of a pretty serious storm system, though it is one of those which hail from Hawaii... we have had rain and wind warnings for days and there is more to come. King tide today on top of it all, and the city had to break out the sandbags. Delta is under a state of emergency.

I wonder if that means babble on is one of the four cyclists of the alpacalips...?

dop said...

why do we try? babble nailed down cod before Wednesday's post went online...

crosspalms said...

Babble,
I should have known you'd be on top of things...

Elevator Operator, Going Down said...


basso's sister, the hair, the hips, the rack and the incredible mouth, she can come over and I'll buy something from her OK.


Anonymous said...

Mmmmm Elisa Basso :)