Monday, February 25, 2008

Apparently Levi Wants To Ride


Well, the rain-soaked Tour of California ended yesterday. And speaking of things that are watered down, non-threatening stage race specialist Levi Leipheimer won the overall classification. This is highly significant, as it makes him the only rider in the event’s three year history to have won the race more than once.

However, this is undoubtedly a bitter-sweet victory for Leipheimer, as he and his entire Astana team have been banned from this year’s Tour de France. Consequently, he’s responded with a characteristically unobtrusive grassroots campaign, “Let Levi Ride.” I confess that I was initially confused when I stumbled upon the website, thinking that perhaps it was the home page of a Malaysian pop star named Letle Viride (pronounced LET-li VI-ri-day). This impression was enhanced by the photo of Leipheimer, whose black hat, bikerish jacket, and steely (or at least aluminum foily) gaze all imply he’s not going to take this whole thing lying down—even though that’s exactly how he’s taken his previous Tours.

Frankly, I find this campaign difficult to rally behind. Something just doesn’t ring true. I think there are a few directions they could have taken this instead that would have at least spoken to the issue more directly, such as:

“Let Alberto Contador Ride”

I was unable to follow the Tour de France last year due to extreme lack of interest, but according to information available on the internet Leipheimer’s teammate Alberto Contador won it last year. I’m not sure then why we should rally behind Leipheimer, who finished third. If I want to watch opportunity being squandered for three weeks I can just follow one of the French teams, or any liberal arts school graduate.

“Let Trek Ride”

The Let Levi Ride URL is actually owned by The Great Trek Bicycle Making Company. This little bit of information should allow you to put a face on any fishy smell you might have detected while visiting the site. I’m sure it’s incredibly frustrating to them that they’ve sponsored the wrong team, but they could have at least been honest about it. After all, the legitimization of Tour de France participation was the only thing keeping the Trek brand from crossing over into full dorkitude. Now that they’re out, they’ll surely join other dorky companies who make bikes exclusively for dentists, like Kestrel, on The Other Side.

“Let Me Cut My Losses and Keep Quiet”

The only reason Leipheimer even wound up on the podium at the Tour last year is that all the riders who otherwise would have comprised the top 10 got thrown out. I’m not so sure he should be staring down the throat of that particular gift horse by causing trouble this year. That’s like getting a huge tax refund by mistake, and then calling the IRS to complain when it doesn’t happen again the following year.

“Let Me Ride Or I’ll Grow Disillusioned And Fulfill Your Negative Expectations Of Me”

I don’t find Leipheimer’s defiance either convincing or intimidating, and I doubt the ASO does either. Instead, I think he’d have better luck taking the self-pitying approach by making a gritty, artsy short film in which, denied the opportunity to explore his full potential, he descends into a shame spiral of drug abuse and self-pity. Such a film would not only be entertaining, but it would also make the ASO feel guilty and show them the error of their ways. The film could be available on youtube, though of course he’d also have to do a gala screening in which he gives a talk afterwards with tears streaming down his face and a snot bubble coming out of his nose.

“Let’s Standardize Bicycle Terminology”

By even caring about this whole thing Leipheimer is acknowledging that the ASO have won. Any kindergartener can tell you that the correct response would be, “Fine, I didn’t want to ride in your stupid race anyway.” Instead, Leipheimer should harness the awesome power of petitions to do something truly useful for cycling—like standardize the term for those secondary brake levers they use on cyclocross bikes. Currently, there are at least five terms that are acceptable in cycling parlance:

--In-line levers
--Interrupter Levers
--Top-mount levers
--Auxiliary levers
--Cross levers

This is more than just confusing. It’s tearing cycling apart. If Levi could put aside his petty personal interests and help us pick one of these terms, the cycling world—and the world in general—would be a much better place.

110 comments:

Anonymous said...

Podium!

Anonymous said...

ZABEL !!!

Sprocketboy said...

Cross levers? On my old Gitane, they were called "safety levers."

Philip Barrett said...

Oh god, no! This could tear the cycling community apart.

Mark said...

Where am I?

Anonymous said...

No, the correct name for those extra brakes is "dork brakes", just like a dork disk.

Anonymous said...

Levi is such a vadge.

erik k said...

yah, so levi won, but how about the coverage last night, it was horrible it starts out and they are talking about the 4900 feet that the racers are about to climb, as the racers are leaving the starting line, then cut to commercial and all of a sudden, 4 laps to go what about the whole mountain stage! I didn't want to only watch the last 4 laps of the race for 40 minuets talk about crappy coverage and bad editing, at least I got the satisfaction of watching the highlights or Rock Racing crashing and getting penalized for motorpacing

Philip Barrett said...

Sprokectboy : My old Gitanes were unfiltered & tasted about as bad as Sartre read. I looked cool though don't you think?

Anonymous said...

Once the cycling community is torn apart - is the tricycle, big-wheel and tall-bike community far behind? And once you lose those folks, middle America isn't far behind. Only Levi can save us!

Chris Mayhew said...

You forgot Runkel levers.

Daddo said...

that was as boring as an article on Levi Leipheimer

Scottie said...

I vote that they also include a picture in the definition of those levers so that people don't continue confuse them with the pieces of stamped crap that were on Sprocketboy's old Gitane.

Strayhorn said...

The Astana mess has attracted the attention of people who don't normally follow the sport. I've had two cow-orkers ask me about it in the past week. I guess that's more evidence that cycling is the new golf, especially since golf is in decline.

More evidence here.

Anonymous said...

there called Sissy-levers over here in the UK, by the few folk I know

Anonymous said...

LET LEVI GET A NEW JACKET with less pockets and zippers and a real collar... and a new hat too.

murphini said...

re: Kindergarden response:

The John Kruk/Lance Armstrong response would have been

"If you don't let me ride, I'll just take my ball and leave"

Anonymous said...

Why does Levi have such a gigantic head? Any body have any clue? Think maybe he has a few extra chromosomes tossed in there some where? Maybe that's what keeps him from expressing any emotion or composing some form of an attack.

Levi should thank his lucky stars David Millar slowed down and got caught on that stage in the ToC, that could've been the end to Levi's ToC run.

Anonymous said...

I'm not familiar with the use of a ball in cycling.

OpenYourEyes said...

You wanker's with your podium posts when you don't even follow the rules! Stop it! You're tearing this blog apart. At least at the beginning. Or until prolly is mentioned. Or, until the ellipses return...

Three first rate quotables:
1. "even though that’s exactly how he’s taken his previous Tours"
2. "If I want to watch opportunity being squandered for three weeks I can just follow one of the French teams, or any liberal arts school graduate."
3. "...gives a talk afterwards with tears streaming down his face and a snot bubble coming out of his nose."

And what a collection of personalities there are within the teams. I hope this keeps up all season. Rock Racing - cocky punk in highschool you couldn't wait to see go down. Team Slipstream - sanctimonious prigs you can't wait to see finishing in the middle of the standings - again, and again, and again. Astana - waaaah, Team Waaaah that got cheated by The Man. Waaah...

The act of cycling is great enough as it is, but getting all this to go with it? Sheer bliss...

Anonymous said...

The music of Letle Viride is the soundtrack for my life.

Pappy said...

Let me say that I laughed heartily at this post - right on the money Snobman.
Leipheimer is almost too easy a target, an athlete w. the qualities of a insurance salesman.
Somebody denounced the Tour as a 'bland race w. a bland winner'. Translation: 'Let Levi Ride'

Anonymous said...

Legalize it - don't criticize it
Legalize it and i will advertise it

Some call it EPO
Some call it the dopin
Some call it testosterone
Some of them call it beta blockas

Just let 'em go... guys will pedal their legs off, purposely check in bunch sprints and their heads explode when they hit the top of Alp d'Whocares. It will take ratings from UFC and give everyone another reason to watch...

Anonymous said...

Contador has a better slogan

RECTIFY IS OF WISE PEOPLE!

Well said my direct translating brother.

Mark said...

For a minute there I thought this was about Levi Strauss.

As for the brake issue, if they are for a cross bike, shouldn't they be named Cross Levers? If you ride your bike on the road, hence Road Bike.

sh said...

A most excellent response to an incredibly dull "cause."

Let Levi Ride is definitely the new golf.

Anonymous said...

don't be dense, mark. you don't use those brakes on a cross, or ride a cross bike on a cross.

Jim said...

Griffin6
Strayhorn, I had no idea that you had Cow-orkers. I have some Cow-orkers too... they aren't as cool as the Hen-grenades I got in the Army, but I'll take 'em. As for our friend Levi... did you catch the Levi documentary film that VS (VS=? Venereal Symptoms? Virtual Secret network? Various Sports?) kept running? It's clear that Levi is now a better rider. More patient. Stronger. And judging from how he was dressed and his demeanor, he's also down with the 420, forties of Schlitz and his homies.

So is it just me, or, IS Michael Ball Rock Racing? I think if there were any questions before, he put them to rest. Nope, Johann Bruyneel isn't Rock Racing. Eddy Mercyx isn't Rock Racing. Nor is Mr. T. But Michael Ball... yep, HE IS Rock Racing. That PSA had to take the cake for the most narcissistic, rambling collection of random thoughts I have ever seen... this is what I imagine Britney divorce procedings must sound like. I wonder if he's going to be so willing to take responsibility if one of the Rock Racing Escalades gets busted with two 55 gallon drums in the back, one with the cream, one with the clear. And the marketing... I thought that the Rock Racing Cam in the Rock Racing Helicopter showing the Rock Racing Team racing along ahead of (or hanging on to) the Rock Racing Escalades while they raced and rocked in the Amgen Rock Racing Tour of California was a refreshing break from the usually over-commercialized world of pro cycling sponsorship. Hard to take the whole skull thing seriously from a jeans retailer though. I mean, c'mon. You're a pirate, or a war criminal, or maybe a garden variety biker gang member/rapist-arsonist, I can accept the skull imagery. But a haute couture jeans retailer? Perhaps maybe a skeletal, debrided hand. Or a femur. Yeah, a femur would make sense for a jeans company. Or maybe crossed bones over a skeletal pelvis. Oddly enough, I have to admire the guy for going (in my estimation) from being irrelevant in my eyes, then to me hating him, then to me admiring his flooding the zone marketing style, to me hoping for a spectacular and immediate Rock Racing Implosion so we could just get it over with, in the space of a month. Cripes, it used to take Steinbrenner two to three years to go through that cycle, Ball did it in a month. What next... duplicating Marge Schott's greatest racial slurs and personal insults, Hasty Shakespeare style? Watching Michael Ball is like dating a crazy chick - it starts out interesting and maybe even wildly fun at times, but it's not hard to see how pretty much every possible version of the future ends with a stabbing, a police visit, somebody's clothes on fire out on the lawn, and your new Acura being sold on an E-Bay Buy-it-Now Auction for $45.

Bottom line is that with all the strange storylines and dark subtexts, the ACOT was a Hunter S. Thompson-esque bottomless coffee-cup of dread and weirdness. I wonder if Ralph Steadman will be doing next year's ACOT yellow jersey...

Cycle Jerk said...

I can't see my house from here.

Unknown said...

Levi is larger than a squirrel, but smaller than a woodchuck. Yet magically, he can put out the power to beat big men in the flat ITTs. I just don't believe it. Bruynell IS the master of the internal program and masking the chemical trail. Levi is 34, going on 23; he never even looked like he breathed hard, because he wasn't.

Peter said...

"Let trek Ride"
Funny, and true

Anonymous said...

Downunder we call them levers "suicide levers"...

Anonymous said...

What's going on lower-middle classers? Sweating this years income tax payment!! One thing that's nice about being in my position is that you can make the right connections in what I call "transaction management", and let's just say taxes are not a worry!!

Anyways, rode my new Seven this weekend around around Central, after a tough week at the market (needed it!). Got a lot of oohs and ahhs on her, she's gorgeous. I got some disgusted looks from a few lower-middle class bikers on their Treks, Cannondales, and Colganos (is that how you spell it?), but they got a taste of their own when I loaded the bike into my H2. I like the H2, it's a nice auto for weekend errands, when I can't fit it into my 'Rati. Enjoy your sedans, mates!

Good post, as usual… I met Levi at a party for a girlfriend's foundation. Nice guy, I guess.

Well, back to work! Pulling a 4 hour day today. Any good recs for a Mojito in South Beach?

Upperclass, out!!!

LK said...

Jim,

Try "Britney's divorce procedings...."

Give the dork a brake.

Anonymous said...

He needs his own hard-core/from the streets rap theme song to go along with his cause. How can ASO refuse the in-your-face style of Americas's own insurance salesman/Shaft, like Allstate but mildly perturbed.

bikemike said...

Wonderful Bike snob!
Wow, Jim, wow!
I let my levis ride up once. Wasn't all that enjoyable...

What Do I Feel Like Riding today? said...

I've heard them referred to as "oh shit" levers

Anonymous said...

This shite reminds me of the "Legalize my Cannondale" campaign..so Levi wins the Tour de Who Cares.

He can race anytime he wants to move away from a team run by Bruyneel, same with Contadoper, who still hasn't quite cleared up things in Spain with some bags of blood in a refrigerator.

But clearly, this is a cause in need of a colored rubber band, may I suggest blood red, pharmacy white or bullshit brown.

In Canada, we call them "pussy levers", as per ISO standard 90003.

Mark said...

Anonymous said...
don't be dense, mark. you don't use those brakes on a cross, or ride a cross bike on a cross.

February 25, 2008 1:59 PM

While I am no officiando on this it seems to me that the term Cross Bike, probably comes from Moto Cross, only no Moto. So your inference to the cross on a bike is really not the case.

Anonymous said...

So they must be mandatory in Canada!

thefutureofamerica said...

"you don't use those brakes on a cross, or ride a cross bike on a cross"

Levi does.

JackH said...

Err, why did Levi join a team so tainted that it looked likely that they wouldn't be allowed in the Tour?

It came as a huge surprise to me that they had the brass neck to continue. I guess the gangster oligarchs that run Astana have had worse days.

meh-wee-uhn said...

"He'll be a dentist, a dentist, he has a talent for causing people pain!"

Anonymous said...

That picture reminds me of Eminem.

Anonymous said...

"let levi ride" is a thinly veiled attempt at giving something new to do for all of the same folks who supported lance's don't 'fuck with the king', tyler's 'chimeric twin' and floyd's 'truthiness defense'. i call it republicanism and therefore stand as far away from the sidelines as possible. let levi race stamsted or cruiak, those are the true hero's of competitive american cycling in our lifetime.

JackH said...

You don't

Wanna mess with Levi

Cause Levi

'll fuckin kill you

Anonymous said...

Thanks Snob. This was the only post where I hadn't even read a word yet and I cracked up literally for a full two minutes.

Karl Rover said...

My first response was, "Is he riding alone?" Maybe he will be a wildcard "Army of One" entry? If they let Levi ride, they should at least give him Horner to keep him company.

Anonymous said...

Upperclass --

You poor man.

You had to ride in Central Park this weekend instead of hiring someone to do it for you like Michael Ball.

I'm getting farklempt just thinking about it.

And no income on which to pay taxes?

It's just too, too Dickensian!

Now, no arguing. We're just going to have to have a bake sale to help you out.

Don't look so surprised! What are friends for?

Anonymous said...

Hey man, I just wanna ride my TREK bike OK! Your just sore because you didn't get to ride behind Lance and wear his old bibs.

Anonymous said...

Sending a petition to a Frenchman to change his mind would have about as much effect as a flea biting a hippo.
Astana dug themselves a hole; let them spend 2008 proving there are not the same team they were in 07.
They're all big boys.

Anonymous said...

Mark said...

"While I am no officiando on this it seems to me that the term Cross Bike, probably comes from Moto Cross, only no Moto."

Ummm, you're kidding, right?

Anonymous said...

more upperclass!!!!!

Anonymous said...

That would be fantastic!! It can benefit my foundation. It helps privileded students with scholarships to the best private schools! Who needs public education when you have status and pedigree!

Going to SohoHouse tonight!! See you there guys (not!).

sh said...

Jim! Whoa!. Verbose as always, but there was a sparkling gem in that stream of self-indulgence:

Watching Michael Ball is like dating a crazy chick - it starts out interesting and maybe even wildly fun at times, but it's not hard to see how pretty much every possible version of the future ends with a stabbing, a police visit, somebody's clothes on fire out on the lawn, and your new Acura being sold on an E-Bay Buy-it-Now Auction for $45

Stabbing....good one.

Anonymous said...

Apparently Contador has a petition site too. However he only has 19,081 Firmas compared to Levi's 39,706 Voices. I guess if you take the exchange rates of Voices to Firmas, they are probably about equal, because after all, what do Americans know about European Cycling?

Timothy J said...

...non-threatening stage race specialist Levi Leipheimer...

That pretty much nails it! Levi can win those stage races that are so early in the season that nobody else cares about them! (Not really counting that one year were he lost the race after wrecking, so the ToC people just decided that everybody should get the same time as the finisher even though the wreck happened before the 3-or 5 or whatever- kilometer mark. He didn't win that one!)

And Contador can win every big tour where the people beating him are pulled/forced/kicked out of the race!

Won't these guys make the Tour more exciting! Watch Contador try to drop the skinny blond guy on the climbs, but finds he can't! Watch Levi ride safely sheltered by his team. Watch Evens.... not attack!

We need more drugged out riders! Druggies attack and make things interesting!

Anonymous said...

cheater brakes.

Pretty sure I saw them on Levi's Equinox on Friday's ITT.

Unknown said...

"Let Johan Brunyeel DS"

I can't wait to see a TdF without him behind the curtain.

Anonymous said...

The top mount lever discussion was long ago decided in the cyclocross community...those are known as "Wussy Levers".

Anonymous said...

Levi, don’t you a worry none about da tour de farce, I know you a gooda boy and no mess with the druggies. Those French bed wetters are not a understand your brillanze. After you finish top tena in da Giro come back to Mamma Mario’s place. I have gotta Mario to ask Il Grillo to drop by and we all have a bath together and play submarines and rubba duckies. Da Mario is now mucha better for getting outda rain and some fina homescooking. Even little Mario looks healthy as the wrinkles have gone. Later on we play da three tenoirs on my gramma-phone , like a singing combo of Giro , TdF and Veulta and everything will be bella. I will even let you sleep with da light on as Mario likes it dat a way

broomie said...

Hmm. In my parts they're referred to as 'cheater brakes'

I don't find watching someone who has been obviously doping entertaining. Watching Rasmussen Time Trial like he was Cancellara and ride away from Contador as casually as getting up form the couch to get a snack, or Nina Kraft pass everyone with a grin on her face without even breathing hard was pretty dull and so obvious you couldn't even pretend they weren't juiced up. Legalizing doping would remove any appeal cycling has as a sport.
Oh, yeah.. Levi, erm..um.. wasn't there room on a team that wasn't disqualified?

broomie said...

Oh wait, was I supposed to say something funny?

Anna said...

Levi should tell the Tour where they can stick it, and join Team DART. I'll even donate a pair of pink oury grips, as long as we don't have to hear anymore about how Levi and Astana got screwed.

Anonymous said...

All this talk about "on a cross" makes me want to go to church.

Anonymous said...

thank god there's sanity out there - a woman in my office is obsessed with levi and i just don't get it. sit this one out and quit whining. no one forced him to join a team that was asked to leave the tour in a (relatively) dramatic fashion. i never felt that was a sound decision.

Anonymous said...

You can't pull for a man who never pulls.

Why doesn't Levi just sit at home on his couch and watch the Tour? He'd be doing the same amount of work. Better yet, maybe he could get George Hincapie or some other tall fellow to sit in front of him, blocking any potentially harmful radiation from the tv.

Anonymous said...

It's nice to know I wasn't the only one who that that was totally um silly.

Dano said...

Ya know, bitchin bout Levi not racin the tour, not doing his pull, ete is crap.

Fact is, he beat several national TT champs at their own game.

Several very good ones.

Levi has earned the right to talk the talk.

meh-wee-uhn said...

I was under the impression that it was "verklempt" not "farklempt" but based on my recent and extensive research into the etymological roots of the word, both spellings are acceptable.

That is all.

Anonymous said...

Please don't let Levi do a Floyd and say something stupid like. "Don't poke the crazy guy."

Anonymous said...

Dano, No one said Levi wasn't fast. Think harder about it.

Anonymous said...

I liked the boy when he was average and rode for German mineral water.

Now, Levi's Kazakh and fast? Huh.

Anonymous said...

Dear Upperclass --

Good for you!

Don't let those pesky collateralized debt obligations get you down. Who could have predicted that even the triple A rated tranche of that securitized subprime debt would be un-collectible?

You enjoy Soho House this evening! (It's Soho House, not SohoHouse, but you knew that didn't you, you scamp!)

One look around the steam rooms on the third floor will convince you that you weren't the only one who lost his shirt!

You just relax and enjoy. I had my cousin J. Pierrepont Leroy call ahead to tell them to let you in.

I assured him your lactose intolerance was under control and you wouldn't break wind amongst the eucalyptus vapors.

Oh don't thank me.

It was just a little white lie for a friend who's down on his luck.

Anonymous said...

DANO - Quit eating small children for breakfast and accept the fact the fact that Levi is a whiny little smurf who couldn't ride his way through a wet paper bag. He TT's well because he has SO MUCH energy from NOT pulling his share at the front. It's so plainly obvious.

b said...

chicken levers.

Anonymous said...

I have those spare brake levers on my bike.

When the sun is behind you, you can cast a shadow that looks like the levers are coming out of your neck.

It's great for pretending you're Frankenstein -- the ultimate Clydesdale.

Anonymous said...

leroy,

perhaps you can help loan upperclass a few bucks for an actual google mail account. feel like extending that generosity a little further (so to speak)?

broomie said...

Anon 10:04

So how do you explain his winning a prologue?

Didn't Levi pull for Contador during the last TdF?

If he is such a poor rider how come someone stronger didn't win? Is it because all the strong riders had no one to ride behind? I guess that makes Levi the smartest rider, then.

Anonymous said...

'cross-tops. we throw that around a lot at citybikes coop in pdx. catchy enough for me and doesn't sound too dude.

Anonymous said...

hey upperclass, did you get to ride your seven " at the soho house?

Anonymous said...

Leroy, right on. Chicken levers win, something like the Chicken bar up on the roofliner of a car

Anonymous said...

Damn why you gotta talk shit on Kestrel?

Timothy J said...

Watching Rasmussen...ride away from Contador as casually as getting up form the couch to get a snack...was pretty dull...

I am guessing you were not watching the same race I was. Once Rasmussen realized that he did not have to match Contador's surges and that he could reel him in at his own pace after every single attack, he had Contadors number. That racing before and after the realization was some of the best racing I had seen in a while! Almost as good as watching a Floyd ride away from the field the year before. Whether they were doped up or not did not matter. It was exciting. If doping results in more entertaining racing, I am all for doping! It is much better than watching a guy in a yellow jersey follow his teammates for 3 weeks and maybe win a time trial.

Of course that is one reason why the classics like Paris-Roubaix will always be far more exciting than any grand tour. People, other than George, attack! They try and blow the field away!

K Sizemore said...

now i'm a huge supporter of pro- level (well, actually amature level, also) doping. and i think that with out juiced up athletes the show isn't nearly as entertaining. (plus drugs give a whole new level of competion: who can do the most before suffering terrible, irreversible, consiquences?) so i'm definately pulling for as many users as possible in all races... however, when i clicked on that "let levi ride" link my guts got instantly twisted and a huge/sudden urge to flee came over me. if all the people getting shunned are going to be such cry babies, i may have to rethink my whole out look on the topic.

Anonymous said...

Anyone seen this blog before?

"http://blog.iheartbikes.com/"

apparently dérailleurs (accent say what?) are for failures?! What a bunch of fixed snobbery.

Let's see who fails on climbing hill.

I hate hipsters.

Anonymous said...

whoops i was too quick to judge.

He's just a bike nerd like the rest of us.

Sorry, he looks nice.

Anonymous said...

haha. little levi the tiny king of wheel suckers. if only his former boss, the "greatest athlete ever" would just admit that he doped just like every other pro athlete on the planet, everyone could relax and go back to normal. poor wee levi would be relegated back to bottle-fetcher and bum boy. aw, that's a sweet image. brave levi, stuggling up thru the peloton, face askew with terrible effort and responsibility. "i must feed Him or He will collapse. He takes the Elixer, so He will not fail. i must be strong." aw.

Marvin Penner said...

treks were always for dentists, remember y-bikes?

Anonymous said...

Anon 1:31,

"I'm not familiar with the use of a ball in cycling."

Familiarize yourself.

http://www.webkuehn.de/hobbys/radball/index_en.htm

Frankly it looks more fun than polo and the skills gained from the sport can be used to launch coffee and soda cups, bottles, etc. from sidewalks into nearby trash (and/or recycling) receptacles while you're helping your friend move that plant in 40-degree weather, poor thing.

Anonymous said...

top-tube pads and more

Mamsterla said...

The thought of a Cadel-Levi TdF rivalry is too much to bear. Maybe the ASO spared us from that dread fate.

Anonymous said...

in other words, anon 1:31, we are referring to testicles. Lance was taking his "ball" and leaving. Get it? BALLS = TESTICLES in this particular reference. stay with us here.

Anonymous said...

Dear Broomie,

No doubt Levi, or will he name himself Diesel or Parasuco in the near future, could be a smart rider. Too bad he's a sandbagger. He knew that Astinka ran afoul of aso and uci so going there was plainly a DUMB move. Possibly a smart rider though.

He should stop listening to his douchebag wife though. She whines more than the Kritzler Twins at a Saks Fifth Ave sale.

Anonymous said...

http://www.deraileduk.com/letlevicry/

Anonymous said...

Marvo larvo, insult me, insult my wife or dog, o.k., but insult my y-frame? Those are fighting words.

Anonymous said...

Hey, Trek tried making mountain bike frames in the shape of the first 24 letters before they settled on the y-frame. In comparison, they only had to go through preparations A through G before they nailed it with Preparation H.

Anonymous said...

maybe the DART team could take Astana's place

Anonymous said...

http://www.contadoraltour.com/

Anonymous said...

Don't let anyone ride

Anonymous said...

This whole thing just has me rolling on the floor snickering...Levi has always been the poster child for general foolishness (I know, I grew up in the same town), and this is no different...let Levi ride indeed...ha ha ha ha ha

Anonymous said...

http://letalbertoride.com/
is now live :)

Anonymous said...

Please stick to something you know about. You admit you don't watch the tour then try to give commentary on it. Sorry, an ignorant rant at best.
Let Astana Ride, should be the web site.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 2/29 10:41am,

If this were a humor site it would be possible that I was joking about not watching the Tour. But of course this site is completely serious, so I guess we can rule that out.

--BSNYC

c-record said...

fuck levi... granted, he does give all short bald dudes hope that they can get a hot wife but that's about it.

Anonymous said...

Levi and TREK ought to be arrested, thrown in solitary confinement for the distorted design of the U.S. Pro National Jersey. C'mon man... give me a break! It doesn't even look like the American Flag.

Anonymous said...

Is bacon a food group?

el7osiny said...

Thank you for the wonderful effort

إني تذكـرت والذكرى مؤرقـة * مجـداً تلـيدا بأيـدينا أضعـناه
أنَّى اتجهتَ للإسـلام في بـلـدٍ * تجْده كالطيرِ مقصـوصًا جناحـاه
كـم صرفتنا يـدٌ كنـا نـصرفها * وبات يـملكنا شعب مـلكناه
بالله سل خلف
بحر الروم عن عرب *

بالأمس كانوا هنا واليوم قد تاهوا
وانزل دمشق وسائل صخر مسجدها * عمن بناه لعل الـصخر ينعـاه
هذى معـالم خرس كـل واحـدة * منهن قامت خطيبـا فاغرا فـاه
الله يعلم ما قلبت سـيرتهم يومـا * وأخطـأ دمـع الـعين مـجراه
يا من يرى عمـراتكسوه بردته * الزيت أدمٌ لـه والكـوخ مـأواه
يهتز كسـرى على كرسيه فرقـا * من خوفه ، وملوك الروم تخشـاه
يا رب فابعث لنا من مثلهم نفـرا * يشـيدون لـنا مـجدا أضعنـاه

Anonymous said...

Boy did I have a good laugh going through this post again Mr. Snob.
It really is a great blog show you have evolved over the years. I've enjoyed it immensely. : )

I was sad you omitted the grandaddy of all secondary cross levers the Runkle. : |


Anonymous said...


............Nice..^_^v................