Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Now Is The Winter Of Our Disco Tent.


(That's five American degrees.)

Good morning!  I love you.  However, there are two (2) groups of people I don't want to hear a goddamn peep out of today, and those are:

1) People in New York City who rode to work today.

You rode to work today?  Good for you.  Now shut up about it (assuming your mouth has even thawed yet).  Certainly the bicycle is one of the greatest inventions ever wrought by humankind.  However, here in New York we also have the greatest public transportation system in the country, if not the entire world, and it's called "the subway:"


(Comes in handy from time to time.)

Hey, it has its problems, and you do run the risk of having your smartphone swiped or getting kicked in the face by a breakdancer, but it's cheap and it's warm, and when it's five fucking degrees outside it ain't a bad choice.

So if today of all days you wanna be a schmuck and not use it that's fine, but I don't want to hear about it.

2) People who live where it's much, much colder.

Yes, I know five degrees is downright balmy in other parts of North America.  For example, I punched "Minneapolis" into a popular weather website just for the heck of it, and noticed that it was minus thirteen American degrees there yesterday--at its warmest:


Even so, I don't wanna hear from you people.  First of all, the "We're colder than you" game is one you can't win, because I'm sure there were places that were colder than Minneapolis, and then they start chiming in, and before you know it it's a great big dick-measuring contest.  (Albeit a reverse dick-measuring contest because everyone's all shriveled because of the cold.)

Also, let's not forget that we're getting your hand-me-down weather today, and the only reason it's 18 degrees warmer here is that the air has been slowly heated by your flatulence as it moves across the country.  So do you think we take pleasure in this little bit of extra warmth when it consists entirely of Midwestern beer farts?  Because we don't.

Of course, none of this should imply that I don't think we, as cyclists, have a right to the road in any weather--unlike the mayor of Watertown, NY, who a reader tells me thinks cold weather cyclists should be "arrested:"


I know I’m gonna get in trouble for this: People who are on bicycles out on streets like this — they should be arrested. I mean, that is a clear and present danger that is being created and if you’re gonna sit there and make the argument that texting while driving is reckless, doing that is reckless and it creates a danger for them and the motorists.

Unfortunately, they’ve got their — quote — rights, so they can do it.

At first I was upset by this, but then I looked up where Watertown is and it all made sense:


See, Watertown is across Lake Ontario from Toronto, so it suffers from "lake effect flatulence:"


Basically, what happens is that every time Toronto mayors Robs Fords farts (which is often), the gases travel across Lake Ontario and intensify as they move over the water's surface, so by the time they reach Watertown they're powerful enough to turn the mayor into a complete fucking moron.

So I feel better knowing that the mayor of Watertown is just another fart-sucker, but for a moment there I was almost mad enough to ride my bike today.

Almost.

Speaking of clueless people in politics, you may have read by now about how political consultant David Axelrod has absolutely no idea what bike share is or that it exists all over the freaking world:

This burst of mental flatulence elicited the following response from Rahm Emanuel:

Wow indeed.

Wow indeed.

Speaking of cold, if you're basically like "Fuck it" and just wanna pack it in until spring, here's a video I saw on VeloNews about how to store your bike for the winter:




All of this is great advice, assuming of course you're completely neurotic and/or you're storing your bike at the bottom of the sea.  For everyone else, here are detailed instructions for long-term bicycle storage:

1) Put it somewhere and don't ride it.

Done.

By the way, did you spot the total bicycle creampie porn in the video at 48 seconds?  Because I did:


Salacious and outrageous.

Of course, if you're really neurotic--like replace-your-helment-every-six-months, write-letters-to-Lennard-Zinn-asking-if-it's-safe-to-run-two-different-brands-of-tire-at-the-same-time neurotic, you'll want to follow my personal bike storage checklist:

Bike Storage Tips For the Truly Insane

--Never hang bicycle by the wheel as the weight of your superlight crabon bicycle can cause the rim to go elliptical over time.

--Whenever possible, suspend bicycle from ceiling using invisible wires like they used to film "the Matrix."

--If you must leave your bike sitting on the floor, be sure to rotate the wheels every three to five days to avoid flat spots.  Also, release and replace air at least weekly to prevent tire degradation.

--If your bicycle is equipped with a suspension fork, remove from bicycle and place on a slowly rotating gyroscopic device that will ensure fork oil keeps fork internals coated.  (Entry-level suspension fork storage gyroscopes start at under $800.)*


(Wood-trimmed rigid steel fork storage gyroscope for ultra-neurotic retrogrouches.)

*[Note that rotisseries are not adequate fork storage gyroscope substitutes as they do not rotate forks on multiple planes, leading to oil depravation of seals and other internals.]

--Brake pads should be stored at the optimal temperature.  If you are storing the bicycle in an unheated space, be sure to remove all brake pads and store someplace warm, such as near a radiator.  If you are storing the bicycle near a heat source, be sure to remove all brake pads and store someplace cold, such as the refrigerator.

--Turn bars to full lock in either direction at least twice a week to avoid headset seizure.

--Place a small piece of lube-soaked cloth between the plates of each chain link to prevent corrosion.  This is known as the "pedicure technique:"


--The fluorescent lighting found in many basements can degrade crabon fiber, so be sure to cover your bicycle in opaque cloth.  If your frame has been exposed to fluorescent lighting for more than 72 consecutive hours then replace frame before riding.

--When removing bicycle from storage in the spring, be sure to not to exceed speeds of 8mph for the first three (3) months or 1,200 miles, as sudden application of torque after prolonged bicycle disuse can result in catastrophic frame or component failure.

Happy riding!

Meanwhile, while I continue to ride my bicycles over the winter, on the worst days (like this one) I prefer to skip the riding and do some maintenance.  For example, a couple of weeks ago I noticed my front rim was dented:


Probably as a result of my adventures on Mount Tampon:


This was causing a pulsing sensation in my front end while braking:


Which in turn was causing Mario Cipollini considerable excitement:


(Did somebody say "pulsing sensation in my front end?")

By the way, if you're wondering why Mario Cipollini is coated in oil, it's because he's about to go into storage for the winter.

Now, I'm pretty neurotic when it comes to bicycles, so in order to repair the dent I used a special high-tech proprietary rim-alignment tool, as well as a dedicated kevlar microfiber rim protection system:


However, utilizing the rim protection system felt like showering with a raincoat, so I threw it away and just bent the fucker:


Then I put everything back together and made a sandwich:


By the way, those faux utilitarian basement-style walls and floors in my bedroom cost me $50,000 but the effect is stunning and well worth it.

See you on the subway, which should be 10 degrees warmer by the time it gets downtown thanks to all the flatulence.

143 comments:

Anonymous said...

yessir; first!

Anonymous said...



Russell: You could join a monastery.

Winger: Did you ever see a monk get wildly fucked by some teenage girls?

Russell: Never.

Winger: So much for the monastery.

Santa said...

Krampus!

Robert Chambers said...

Hello

Anonymous said...

MIDW
ESTB
EERF
ARTS

Also: Toop Teen.

Flyover BC said...

top ten

Serial Retrogrouch said...

too cold... too early... nuts frozen

Buffalo Bill said...

I brought my pump today.

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...you forgot to mention that they were saying the 5 american degrees FELT like -18 american degrees because of the wind... and to me, it felt even more minus than that.

Anonymous said...

Top 10?

Anonymous said...

1st after 10, that would be 11
23932595 n-127

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...you forgot to mention that they were saying the 5 american degrees FELT like -18 american degrees because of the wind... and to me, it felt even more minus than that.

Comment deleted said...

Would you like to hear from climates where it will almost reach 70 (merkin) today?

It's not all gravy though; it was 40 on my ride in. Pretty brutal.

Synonymous said...

New photos today, Babs?

Comment deleted said...

Oh come, oh come Emanuel,
And smack down David A-A-Axelrod.

Anonymous said...

Good one!

Buffalo Bill said...

If you do ride, that wind chill bs is meaningless. It 'feels like' the surface of Mars. What a crock.

Anonymous said...

Top XV !!

BikeSnobNYC said...

Comment deleted,

What was the "feels like" on the cultural vapidity index?

--Wildcat Rock Machine

the2002saga said...

I think you meant deprivation. I wouldn't want my fork seals gettin all depraved over the winter.

Anonymous said...

All that just so you could post a pic of your Chris King hub. Well played.

Comment deleted said...

Snob,

-5 Sohos.

Serial Retrogrouch said...

"Unfortunately, they’ve got their — quote — rights, so they can do it." says the esteemed mayor...

...unfortunately, he's got his –quote– dick, so he can do it.

Bama Phred said...

Shrinkage! Shrinkage!

Marcel Da Chump said...

Polar fartex

the Commentariat said...

The Velonews question came from Vanja. I thought that I saw Babble's vanja in that upskirt yesterday.

Anonymous said...

Disco rice on the streets of chinatown.

the Commentariat said...

The Velonews question came from Vanja. I thought that I saw Babble's vanja in that upskirt yesterday.

hatch said...

Dilky Dilkinson. Vegetable platter. Now.

the Jimboner said...

There is nothing to learn from the second kick of a bike messenger.

Perenium said...

Its cold in here in LA too.

RoadQueen said...

Yes, because to use a roadway with anything other than an automobile should surely be illegal.

Putz. Anywho, I won't comment on the suck-tastic weather, since you don't want to hear it.

I will offer though, that cold weather has a different affect on women than men. Go ahead and think about that for the rest of the afternoon.

Congratulations to Anon #1 and Anon #2, also to Santa for another podio finish! Fantastic!

JB said...

"All of this is great advice, assuming of course you're completely neurotic and/or you're storing your bike at the bottom of the sea."

I saw more maintenance in that video than I've performed on any bike ever.

Also, I can't believe you are admitting to knowing what "creampie" means. Because I don't know what that means, and either does McFly.

DB said...

Good one today.
Changing my name to Polar Vortex.

Snob: the photo of the perfect feet and toes kinda turned me on. More feet and dirndls, please.

crosspalms said...

My kingdom for a bike messenger.

JB said...

With weather, us Midwesterners get to feel smugness toward you East Coast Elites.

The national news/NPR goes nutso over the frigid temps, blizzard, heat wave, et al., while we just shrug and say, "Meh, we had that yesterday."

Yeah Cleveland! said...

"Midwestern beer farts" - Kona Pipeline Porter and I are doing our part(s).

Anonymous said...

In my pre-bicycling cycling days, i was in the Army stationed at Ft. Dumb (Drun) NY, just outside Watertown. That lake effect shit is no joke but neither is the -40 amerikan degrees. I kinda think it would be unsafe but hey, thats mainly because people up there drive like shit. Anyway, glad to be back in FLA (where people also drive like shit) where we got down to 25 with a wind chill of 13. At least i'm not shovelling snow.

ken e. said...

wtf? weather chat started at what time?

mikeweb said...

When you have to preface whatever you're going to say with the statement "I know I'm gonna (sic) get in trouble for this", that's usually a good indicator that you should just shut the fuck up.

grog said...

Your adjustable wrench seems comfortable. How's the nipple wrench today?

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

How cold is it on Uranus ?

balls™ said...

It was 9deg 'merican here behind the tobacco curtain this morning.

Bike to work? No fucking way. I really wanted to just stay in bed, but the wife got out of bed and there was no reason to stay.

Anonymous said...

If I ever saw a mechanic haphazardly spraying WD40 like that near my rims, I'd punch them in the neck.

STG said...

I rode to work today, I wore a ski helmet and its a really good idea. Only problem was that my snot froze inside my nose.

Roille Figners said...

"I'm gonna get in trouble for this stupid fucking thing I'm about to say."

"But I just can't control myself because I'm such a meh-verick"

McFly said...

I know I’m gonna get in trouble for this:


I could start 68% of the stuff I do or say with that precursor....

Anonymous said...

Can't believe you would use a common adjustable wrench to mangle a rim like that.

I use the Park model RML-7 laser-guided rim mangler. It is blue, has a laser, and says "Park" on it. It is super accurate because lasers.

babble on said...

Brrrrrrr it's a little bit nipply out there in the rest of North Merica today!

Commentariat - yeah, but did you notice how it's all lit up?

balls™ said...

Oh, wait... what I meant to say was:

I rode my awesome fat bike to work today, and it's colder here than it is in [insert your town here]. It was epic. My snot froze and my junk is frostbitten, but it was worth it because "your" a wimp for taeking the subways.

There. Now I feel superior. Hand me another doughnut.

Roille Figners said...

No joke:

the Rim 'Rench

From the guy who died when he accidentally sprung one of the booby traps he'd set in his house.

Flyover BC said...



McFly@12:32 You must be married.

Anyway, it's a balmy 18 degrees here in NEW Mexico. It's not good riding weather, but good enough.

Freddy Murcks said...

A rim dent is a small price to pay for a ride on Mt. Tampon. You're lucky that you didn't end up with blood and sloughed tissue spattered all over your bike. That stuff can clog up a chain faster than you can say "I'm Mario Cipolini and I am eating pussy."

23899628 137

Euro Spondee said...

Imma get in trouble for saying this, but I am sitting here in the almost sunny Bay Area wearing a T-shirt with the window open, wishing I could get out on my bike instead of pretending to work..
But I feel like I am missing out on that 'we're all in this together' that must be going on in the polar vortex.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for that link Roille. Who knew that booby trap bombs could be so dangerous?

samh said...

If it rains, take the bus.

3G said...

Strava your Weather!

Anonymous said...

When I see someone cycling in bitter cold weather only one thing comes to mind - DUI. Hope you get your licence back by spring.

cycle

dancesonpedals said...

I want to thank STG for making it just a little more real for me today







i guess a robot would never 'use terfaxg' but I want to buy some

dnk said...

Despite the admonition to shut the fuck up about over-sharing in the comments section about riding one's bike to work in the cold, here I go:

This morning, I figured that I had one last chance to make it real. You know. To trade in these wings for some wheels.

So it was bike, bike, bike, baby! And just when I was feeling 200 feet high on the W-Burg Bridge, it was.....flat. Flat tire.

Reminiscent of yesterday's post, I thought, "yeah, fuck y'all because I can change my own tube!". And then I realized that it was too cold to remove gloves for the requisite time to change the tube.

So I stood there, boo-hoo, waiting for Snob or some other angel who traded in wings for some wheels to bike by and change my tube for me. But only for a minute. Because I realized that wasn't going to happen.

So I walked my sorry ass off the bridge, found a CitiBike, and ghost-rode my broken chariot up to my office at 42nd Street where I could change the tire in relative comfort.

The end.

You're welcome.

Esteemed Commenter DaddoOne said...

Are you actually telling people to take the bus?

time to retire: we need a new Dread Pirate Roberts

dancesonpedals said...

you know, if i hit enter enough, I get a full page











































oeanrsn take

mikeweb said...

Be careful of your plumbing in this arctic weather everyone.

If your pipe freezes it could be a problem, but then if you feel a pulsing sensation in the front end you'll be just fine.

BTW, while we're here freezing our toes (and pipes) off, some people are getting theirs sucked in front of kids.

NiMo said...

The cheese plays an important role alongside beer in our Midwestern farts. It's the source of our signature "barny" fart scent.

Provided for folks who don't know the dairy:

http://www.eatwisconsincheese.com/cheese/Glossary.aspx?fc=B

etherhuffer said...

I have always wanted a rim job with a Swedish micrometer. Now I know how. Uff da.

CommieCanuck said...

It was so cold in NYC today....
..the New Year's ball went back up.
Thank you.

CommieCanuck said...

"He was licking her toes," a witness told the Post. "She would sit in his lap. Then he'd put her feet in his mouth. He licked her toes and was playing with her feet."

Gaaaa...no amount of alcohol is going to fix that image, and its too cold to fly to Boulder.

Yarpo said...

Will ride to work mid-afternoon in warm temps and dry conditions because Califaxnia is having a drought. Will ride home late in colder temps dressed like I'm supposed to be cross-country skiing, but not Angela Merkel-style cross-country skiing...

The gratuitous creampie shot was disgusting, Snob! Think of the cheeldren, Snob, the CHEELDREN!

If I continue to hang my bikes by the wheel-on-a- hook method, will they eventually bend their way into becoming Elliptigos? Will I feel a sense of shame when they do?

BENT
RIMS

Anonymous said...

"I know I’m gonna get in trouble for this: People who are on bicycles out on streets like this — they should be arrested."

You're damn skippy you're gonna get in trouble:
"Bikes", "Bicycles", "People", and "out on the streets" are all trademarked by Specialized.
You will be hearing from their lawyers.

vsk

McFly said...

Hey WCRM do you live in a Spanish Monestary?

You should finish that title...Now Is the Winter of Our Disco Tent......As We Warm Our Scranii from the Steam of the Laundry Mat Vent......

Anonymous said...

FORD FART




ftwayPo CREEP

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...i would comment more, but my web browser is frozen, and so is the captcha bot. no pun intended... seriously.

Anonymous said...

shitty fucking weather here. rain yesterday and cold as balls today, haven't been able to ride to work yet this week. the subway is okay but fucking sucks compared to riding. Mother Nature, you spiteful bitch, please give us some decent fucking weather so I can stop taking the subway. I don't like it.

Anonymous said...

The great writer, drunk, insane person, Frederick Exley was from Watertown. sounds like all that town has going for it.

Anonyidiot corrector robot said...

I'm bored today.

Come on, give me something Anonyidiot(s).

Roille Figners said...

Watertown. The town named after some water.

Comment deleted said...

Makes one wonder why there aren't more Dirttowns.

Dooth said...

The toes in the "pedicure technique" are oh so suckable. I'd even suck the polish off her nails.

Yeah, I'm bored, like Iggy Pop sang--" I'm the chairman of the bored."

Roille Figners said...

It's like, in the 40s here. It's a 40-degree day. Nobody wanna hear shit about a 40-degree day.

Roille Figners said...

CD maybe it's because if you want dirt you can just reach down and grab some, but if you want water -- and I'm totally gonna get in trouble for saying this -- some greedy mofos down there in Watertown are hoarding it all!

DB said...

Commie at 1:55 for the win.

Anonymous said...

You definitely don't want to hear this, but it is 75 degrees here in Los Angeles. It is the only reason people live here. That, and the great tacos.

JB said...

"She would sit in his lap. Then he'd put her feet in his mouth. He licked her toes and was playing with her feet."

Limber gal.

Beth said...

Rob Ford farts. Robs Fords fart.

It was 12 American degrees at the Austin airport this morning, so I'll be driving a government-issued Fords Escapes to South Padre Island today.

No time to bring a bike, though, dammit.

Anonymous said...

David Axelrod was in my class at Stuyvesant. It took me this long to realize he was a fool.

leroy said...

I hear a dog could freeze to a fire hydrant.

babble on said...

That was a brilliant title, snob, and a stellar post. LMFAO! Lake effect flatulence indeed... we're sitting pretty in Vancouver under a great warm cloud of Russian vodka farts. Or maybe it's Fukufarts, and it's hot in more ways than one...

DNK never ever trade in yer wings.

Mikeweb - Thanks. That image is burned into my mind.

Madonna said...

I used to like Tacos.

Not so much anymore.

Anonymous said...

I remember doing the toe suckin in the drunken throws(tm) one eve. The fertile crescent gained lubricity the harder I increased the suction until there was a shuddering/moaning combo and it all came to a halt.

This lil piggy went to freakytown on a bullet train.

Anonymous said...

Made glorious summer by this carbon fork.

Elvis Pervsley said...

Ohhhhhhhhhh mommmmmaaa.....those are some nice lookin feets.

Why don't choo take yo fine lil frame down to the jungle room and wait for the King....

Comment deleted said...

I'm probably going to get in trouble for saying this, but babies should be eaten, preferably drenched in a nice puppy sauce.

dnk said...

Babs,

Agreed. "Now is the Winter of Our Disco Tent" is one of my favorite headlines on this blog.

My favorite post ever? Easy. Google "BSNYC how can we sleep when our beds are burning" for that one.

Pity the YouTube embeds no longer work, but it's still the funniest post ever.

mikeweb said...

babble,

Apologies.

And please don't construe the favorable comments about today's toe polish photo to mean that we would like to see pictures of your toes/ feet, lovely am I'm sure they are.

More like yesterday's are just fine, sweetums.

Vernal Magina said...

podium, hellz yeah!

ge© said...

It's 5 Canadian degrees here but I still didn't ride. Because rain and bus.

CommieCanuck said...

Commie at 1:55 for the win.

Sorry to go all Hesjedal, but my dope test came back positive for traces of Stephen Colbert. I'm certain it's because he licked a steak I ate last month.

mikeweb said...

It's so cold in New York I went for a walk and accidentally keyed someones car.

With my nipples.

CommieCanuck said...

Makes one wonder why there aren't more Dirttowns.

Springfield, Dirttown same diff. There's still only one Dildo, Newfoundland . The population is almost all female, they seem to have no need for men around there.

This is feature in The 15 most unfortunate city names , which include: Penistone UK, Wetwang UK, Middlefart Denmark, and Fucking Austria.

I think there was a town of Fucking near Athol, NY, in the county of Fucking-Athol.

Lumpen Fredetariat said...

Commie on fire today - we should gather around him to stay warm.
Ton up by lunchtime = people like to talk about the weather, eh?

babble on said...

This place is always so much fun when you're here, CC. ++ again :D

Heh heh. Yeah. Sorry go gloat folks, but the cherry trees are in full bloom in Victoria. We are in on the Californian drought for sure... the reservoir looked almost dire a while ago. Is that like saying I'll probably get in trouble for saying this, but?

I rode in the 5 C for Canadian wet warmth at stooopid o'clock this morning because speed junkie.

JLRB said...

7 or 8 years ago when I was getting back into commuting by by by bicycle I rode my bike to work on day as cold as this just to see how it was. It was kinda fun and coworkers were all "you're nuts" but mostly it sucked so today I drove the car I own and cranked up the heat and tunes. Cause pussy, and older, and pussy.

Anonymous said...

So Babble you were at Raymond Lum, Inc. The photographer? Did y'all keep it artistic or did it involve any creampie's? Its OK either way with us.......really........upskirt sans panties is the stuff of junior high dreams.

Osiris said...

When the time for seasonal storage arrives, I remove the wheel, headset and bottom bracket bearings encasing them in sealed urns, bathed in sweet oils. Then I carefully wrap the frame in strips of lightly greased linen of the finest quality before placing it in a set of three nesting containers called 'cyclophaguses' before the final task of storage in the underground vault until the appointed time to rise up an ride again.

Anonymous said...

Ra for you, Osiris.

Dooth said...

I'm envious of Osiris' bikecophagus.

Blog Drafter said...

You can't get colder than dead. After that, it just doesn't matter.

Still Bitter said...

Hey Blog Drafter; you never met my ex.

JLRB said...

Disco tent was an embarrassing erectile condition commonly experienced at junior high dances in the 70's

JLRB said...

Have a nice day!

Blog Drafter said...

Ex humor, lol.

babble on said...

Anon@ 4:39 - yup that's the place. Does it still count as sans knickers if you're wearing hose?

Mikeweb - ooooh, it's sweetums now, is it? K then, since you asked so nicely.

dnk - cheers. That was fun. :)

Anonymous said...

Shifters are the way forward; good for straightening brake discs too.

I occasionally get text messages which read "Minus fucking 38!" (or similar) from my mate in Finland. C rather than F, incidentally.

hey nonny mouse

Comment deleted said...

Anon, at minus fucking 40, F = C.

Anonymous said...

I wear ho's when I got a little extra jingle.

CycloXdresser said...

I hear ya buddy. Cross-dressing ain't cheap if you like fine lingerie.

The Rook said...

Balaclava under my stocking cap. Paintball mask w/thermal lenses. Cold rider-ing here in THE Quincy Illinois. Negatory 14 deg Faggin-height. Heat wave on the way tomorrow. High of 22.

Anonymous said...

You cultural imperialist Nothern Hemispehrians are wimps.

A slight chill in the air and you all go into hibernation. Wimps.

Around here it's so hot the road (the actual road!) is melting, train tracks have buckled stranding every train and the merciless heat has frazzled the trains' aircon and every passenger across the entire network has died in their carriages.

There's no sunscreen with a high enough SP factor to prevent contracting terminal skin cancer after a mere 30 seconds exposure to the sun. Unrelentingly beating down, the scorching sun softens tyres to such an extent that you get a puncture every 30 metres, but you can't repair the flat because you'll suffer third-degree-burns if you touch any part of the super-heated bike. So you just stay where you are and drink your urine to stay alive because any water you had has long ago evaporated. And when your urine runs out, you have to drink someone else's urine.

Do you hear us simpering about the weather like you wimps do?

No. No you don't.

Because we're not wimps.

RoadQueen said...

*sigh* sunshine. How I miss thee...

Anon420 said...

Area rider dismounts in protest against cycle lanes, falls into sea.

http://www.stuff.co.nz/nelson-mail/news/9587793/Cycle-lane-protest-ends-up-on-rocks

Anonymous said...

Does any other city have these big red boxes to rent bad DVDs from? And people watching this flatulence without helments? Really? We're the only ones, huh? Just here...hmmm....

Dick Lum, Inc. said...

I really enjoyed............the shoot.

My lighting assistant kept trying to stick his head under that skirt. He claimed "Creative Artistic Control" of the project....

That was one great ass said...

"BSNYC how can we sleep when our beds are burning"

Frilly Chick was top of the podium that day. Where, oh where, has our Frilly Tush gone?

Cheers said...

Anon@803: "And when your urine runs out, you have to drink someone else's urine." Some people produce really dark urine, some people clear. It's called terroir. So before you drink someone else's urine you should ask them if their from California or Bordeaux.

mikeweb said...

Whilst walking to the subway station this morning, I witnessed two cyclists in the 5 degree 'murican tempurature.

JB said...

I told my butler that he could take the subway to my villa today, instead of the penny farthing that I typically require.

JB said...

"Fat Bikes. Meh." and then the comments

DB said...

Still Bitter at 5:35 for the late win!

McFly said...

OK. I know this is risky. I am going to expose my tender white underbelly.

Does anyone have any recommendations on a sub-$200 rear shock, 6.5 x 1.5 preferably? Currently have a 5th Element Air.

Its missing one element, air. $110 for a rebuild so I am thinking new. Actually I was thinking ARBY'S(tm) then new.

JB said...

Screw the rear.......shock, McFly. Just have a frame builder re-build your frame for a wide rear axle and put a fat-bike wheel on the back.

C'mon, it's all fat bikes these days.

JB said...

Seriously, I know nothing about rear shocks. I've always gone rigid with the rear end.

Anonymous said...

Do the rebuild, there's nothing under $200 that'll compare.

Anonymous said...

Maybe a RS Monarch R for $195? Yikes, you wanna put that on an Uzzi?

McFly said...

Found a guy in Canadia to do it. I am afraid it will be packed in The Wed Weed when it comes back. Actually I am hoping it will. Plus I kind of wanted 2 shocks...cause ya know....'Murkian Excess.....

McFly said...

Why should a Monarch not go on an Uzzi? I really am out of my depth here.

JLRB said...

butterflies hate machine guns

JLRB said...

especially when misspelled

McFly said...

lol. Seriously....lol.

Anonymous said...

You could, you're just putting an "entry-level" component on a higher end frame. IMHO, the Uzzi was a pretty badass rig in its day. If you ride it like it was meant to be ridden, i.e. shred, you may find that you blow that Monarch up sooner than later.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, I should correct myself and say that the Uzzi is still a badass rig. I'm assuming that yours is a few years old if it had a 5th Air on it.

Bob Patterson said...

Weather being what it is, Ithink the trick using cable ties snugged up around whell/tire all around circumference of tire for traction is a good idea. More of a redneck solution than a fredlution . Bob Patterson, Fernley, NV

Anonymous said...

Hey WCRM,

Wow just wow! I know a day late and a dollar short. But I've been deeply contemplating these Axelrod-style comments to try to fathom where they come from. I think it's just complete emotional rejection. Outdoors? eek Sweaty? eww Filthy streets? puke! Cars? f that!

It's irrational, bigoted rejection on every level possible. No thinking necessary.

Have a great day!

Anonymous said...

Do people think it is better to have a different bike for winter? One set-up with winter tyres and mud guards?

http://www.triwithme.org/blog/new-winter-wheels

Or OK just to clean every week?