Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Premium Tweed: Urban(e) Cycling

Hey duders! Are you psyched for the 2012 release of the studio feature film movie picture "Premium Rush?" Do you feel validated now that the veneer of your subculture has been hastily applied with a thin layer of literary wheatpaste over a formulaic plot that was first conceived by a bunch of studio-owned monkeys with typewriters back in the 1930s? Are you stoked, pumped, hyped, primed and ready for the mental "hand release" that comes from stunt-tastic action like this?

Unfortuantely, even today, the Hollywood studio system is still a lumbering behemoth that requires thousands of people, millions of dollars and multiple years in order to package a pop-cultural phenomenon for sale and bring it to the big screen. Meanwhile, our pop culture is changing faster than ever before, thanks to the Internet, and smartphones, and corporate radioactive electronic penguin trend-spotting-and-street-marketing teams. This means that, by the time that big multi-million dollar movie reaches one of the few movie theaters still in business, the trend it's built on is already hopelessly outdated. In fact, pop culture moves so quickly that you can walk into a movie dressed at the height of style, and by the time you walk out your wardrobe will be retro-chic.

It's no surprise then that the "fixie" thing actually went out of style while they were filming "Premium Rush," which is why if you watch the trailer carefully you'll see that the protagonist abandons his "fixie" for a trials bike about halfway through:

(So over "fixies" duder, slammed seats and disc brakes FTW.)

I thought he liked to ride. Fixed-gear. No brakes. Now I feel alienated and betrayed by a corporate entity I once believed embraced me and my way of life. I'm totally throwing away the "Premium Rush" tie-in fixed-gear cog that came in my Happy Meal now. If you need me, I'll be in my room sobbing and playing video games.

Given the state of affairs, it's no wonder so many of our nation's youth (and by "youth" I mean 30-somethings, since 30 is the new 12) turn to drugs. In the 1980s, the "crack epidemic" and it's throbbing hip-hop soundtrack was supposed to be ruining our neighborhoods and destroying our cities. Now, crack and hip-hop are positively quaint (hence the popular breakfast cereal, "Crack 'N Rap"), and the new scourge is apparently "jam bands" and "whip-its," a potent combination which appears to be bringing Williamsburg, Brooklyn to its designer denim-clad knees:

Yes, this past weekend, mobs of Hacky Sack-punting frat boys took to the streets of Sub-Canada's most trendiest neighborhood, sucking on balloons like ticks on a dog:

"Concertgoers turned the northside of Williamsburg into an open-air 'drug orgy' after Saturday night’s performance by Widespread Panic, wantonly consuming nitrous oxide from balloons in the streets around East River State Park."

Here is shocking video of the incident:


Needless to say, local residents were appalled--not so much by the drug use, but by the lack of fashion sense. No sight is more offensive to the typical Nü-Williamsburger than the dreaded long-sleeve-under-a-polo-shirt combo. "There were backwards SUNY Stony Brook caps and men with tribal ankle band tattoos everywhere," cried one witness. "It was horrible."

Still, it's only natural that this sort of urban conflict should arise, since "more people live in cities than ever before." Did you know that most of New York City was still farmland until 1979? It's true! So what's the answer? How do we convince neighbor to respect neighbor in these newfangled "city" things? Well, the answer's as obvious as the nitrous oxide-filled balloon on a frat boy's face: Have a t-shirt contest!

Take to the city streets. Visit bike hangouts. Research the history of urban cycling. Look at how bikes are reshaping your own city, from the social and economical impact to music, design, photography, and street art.

Actually, that's exactly what Sony Pictures did, and the result was "Premium Rush." Still, I decided to submit my own entry anyway. To that end, I took to the city streets. I visited bike hangouts. I identified urban cyclists I thought were cool, and I followed them into bars and smelled them when they weren't looking. (They smelled bad.) Then, once I'd finished my research, I "curated" a t-shirt design that I feel encapsulates both what it means to ride a bicycle in an urban environment, and the manner in which cycling has transformed the cityscape. Here is that design:


I plan to donate my winnings to my charitable foundation, S.N.O.B., which is the "Society for Nitrous Oxide (a)Buse."

Of course, if you really want to be on the cutting edge of urban cycling, you have to travel back in time, since the hottest thing in on-the-bike lifestyle fashion right now (both literally and figuratively) is tweed. In fact, tweed rides are becoming so popular that the sequel to "Premium Rush" will probably be a tweed-themed cycling movie called "Premium Rash." (I don't want to give anything away, but the title has to do with the condition of Joseph Gordon Levitt's "taint" after cycling in tweed all day long.) Not only that, but I've just received a "pressing release" informing me that there will be a "Tweed Run" in New York City on October 15th:

The Tweed Run is an event that sees cyclists of all ages dressed in timeless period attire and pedalling their way through a modern metropolis to raise money for a good cause. The route includes our famous Tea Break, a halfway stop where participants are served pots of tea and cucumber sandwiches. Sponsors of the event include Rugby Ralph Lauren, bicycle manufacturers and outfitters Pashley Cycles and Brooks England, traditional barbershop chain Murdock and Jeeves and Jericho: The Jolly Good Tea Company.

Whereas common sense might dictate that all you have to do is show up and ride, apparently you actually have to register. I'm not sure how they're going to enforce that, but presumably anybody spotted riding a bicycle in the greater New York City metropolitan during that time in a wardrobe that harkens back to any time period prior to 1950 will be fined. Also, keep in mind there are rigorous style guidelines:

Proper attire will of course be expected, so dapper gents and elegant ladies should prepare their best outfits. Suggested attire includes: woollen plus fours, Harris Tweed jackets, flat caps, Fair Isle jumpers, alpaca coats, merino wool team jerseys, cycling skirts and perhaps a jaunty cape for the ladies, cravats or ties for gentlemen.

I don't know what any of those things are, but I'm reasonably certain that my closet contains none of them--except for a tie, but if I put that on it means that somebody died. I'll just take these instructions to mean that you should show up looking like Mr. Peanut's British cousin who never married--or, if you're a woman, like Mr. Peanut's British cousin's close friend who can't understand why he always takes her to parties but never makes a pass at her.

Lastly, from tweet to tarps, I've received another "Message from Occupied Wall Street," and it had this to say:

On September 18th, 2011, we were awoken by police bullhorns around seven in the morning, they objected to us protecting ourselves from the rain. They told us that the tarps suspended above us had to be taken down. We held a General Assembly to determine how to respond. We decided that we would hold the tarps over ourselves and our possessions. The police ripped the plastic away from us. We then scrambled to protect our possessions, primarily the media equipment streaming our occupation to the world. The police were also mostly interested in our cameras, it seems like they don't want you watching us.

Before we say more about what happened to us it seems important to point this out: we do not think the police are our enemy. They have jobs, how could we fault them for that, when one sixth of America lives in poverty? when one sixth of America can't find work? The police are part of the 99 per cent.

The police informed us that the tarps over our equipment counted as a tent, and were therefore illegal. We objected to this interpretation of the law. One of us sat on top of the tarp to keep the police from extralegally removing our possessions. This is what happened next - it is graphic:



Maybe the protesters should switch from orange hippie hats to tweed. If they had then "Tarpgate" might have been averted. Nobody would harass a bunch of people dressed like Mr. Chips standing around nibbling cucumber sandwiches.

158 comments:

petrus said...

Numero uno!!

petrus said...

Top 35!

petrus said...

Ride on. Nothing to see here.

petrus said...

1-2-3-4

petrus said...

Anybody? Bueller?

petrus said...

Fish n' chips with honey now???

petrus said...

< yawn >

petrus said...

adios, amigos.

bees blood.

screaming skull said...

FALSE START!

Ed said...

Ten!

Xak said...

Eleventy first!

So early today, Mr Snob.

Here I was following yesterdays links, and BAM! You caught me with my chamois underpants down.

Anonymous said...

Maybe a tweed suit to wear over your chicken suit would suffice?

JDH said...

At home with the Flu. Best I've ever placed!

hillier99 said...

Sat up and coasted in...

hillier99 said...

Worked hard on the leadout and coasted in...

GhostOfTyrone said...

I'm looking forward to "Premium Roast" - the action adventure film about riding your bike to your job at the coffee shop you've been forced to work at due to the death of fixie culture. Not as exciting, but plenty more dialogue and tons of room for tweed-themed chase scenes.

theEel said...

toptwampeel...


weed.

Anonymous said...

Top twentyish!

Anonymous said...

neunzehn !

Blog Drafter said...

Rounding out the top twenty!

Tony Tiger said...

Cereal has progressed too - the "popular breakfast cereal, Crack 'N Rap" is now being remarketed as an all organic, vegan version "Rip 'N Crack"

JDH said...

Actually, your charitable foundation is called S.N.O.A.

Burt Reynolds 531 said...

The trendy tattoo thing puzzles me. It's like if you got a permanent haircut in the 50s or something. You would always look like the guy on that faded Schlitz sign above the bar down by the railroad tracks. (Don't go in there and try to order a Schlitz, either. They haven't sold the stuff since their wholesaler went bankrupt in 1982. You might as well have Noob tattooed on your forehead.)

disgrutled said...

Snob, your blog has 99% convinced me to never visit NYC again. What twits.

BikeSnobNYC said...

JDH,

You're right, I fixed it, the "a" is silent.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Esteemed Commenter DaddoOne said...

This is fuckin' hilarious...

"..you should show up looking like Mr. Peanut's British cousin who never married--or, if you're a woman, like Mr. Peanut's British cousin's close friend who can't understand why he always takes her to parties but never makes a pass at her."

Paul Bowen said...

What does Nitrous Oxide "do"? I use it to make my voice squeaky to amuse the children, I had no idea it could get you off.

Why are tweed rides so irksome? I'm very live-and-let-live generally and actually own a tweed suit but whenever I see pictures of tweed riders I want to punch the living shit out of them. Odd.

Esteemed Commenter DaddoOne said...

you don't consider the police your enemy?

what kind of protesting is that?

JDH said...

Snob, my work here is done. Now, I gotta go lie down.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

I'm so glad my reality is steadfastly grounded in the world of shed culture. A culture that has not changed much in the past two hundred years.

Ints L. said...

Just rewrite it to
S.N.O.B., which is the "Society for Nitrous Oxide aBuse."

Paul Bowen said...

Oh wait, that's Helium. Idjut.

"Inhalation of nitrous oxide for recreational use, with the purpose to cause euphoria and slight hallucinations, began as a phenomenon for the British upper class in 1799, known as "laughing gas parties"."

In tweed, I have no doubt.

PawnShop said...

pop culture moves so quickly that you can walk into a movie dressed at the height of style, and by the time you walk out your wardrobe will be retro-chic.

I think instead of 'style', you mean 'fashion'.

True style ages slowly, if at all.

Buffalo Bill said...

So let me see if I got this right: Wednesdays are for weed, and Saturday night is for whip-its?

My calendar just keeps getting busier.

Jasper said...

Frat boys in polo shirts, new fogies in tweed, wussy protesters who want to make nice with the police...talk about the age of decline. It's enough to make me reach for another balloon

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

"Cyklar, bicicletas, and vélos are fun and inexpensive and they’re infiltrating asphalt cracks of cities across the world!"

wtf!??

Anonymous said...

N03T WEED


WEDT WEED

skink said...

Just drop the T in Tweed
and I'm there.

PawnShop said...

Whip-its are sooooo late '70s.

Marcel Da Chump said...

I'm proud they weren't

SUNY New Paltz caps.

panino said...

when one sixth of America can't find work? The police are part of the 99 per cent.
Pure matemathics!

screaming skull said...

Next week:
TUESDAY TWEED!

crosspalms said...

rct,
I wondered about the asphalt cracks, too.

Does the flat cap go over the helment or under? Inside the straps or out? I'm busy starching my tweed fenders for the occasion.

Anonymous said...

When a good time turns around you must whip-it, you will never live it down unless you whip-it. I sat whip-it. Whip-it good.

Esteemed Commenter DaddoOne said...

what about when a problem comes along?

Devo said...

Whip-it good!

Mark said...

go forward

move ahead

try to detect it

it's not too late

le Correcteur said...

Great sentence, WRM:

"In fact, pop culture moves so quickly that you can walk into a movie dressed at the height of style, and by the time you walk out your wardrobe will be retro-chic."

le Correcteur

ant1 said...

ant1st!

Mothersbaugh said...

step on it quick

break your mama's back

Mothersbaugh said...

step on it quick

break your mama's back

Jocko Homo said...

are we not men?

Devo also said...

it's a beautiful world
we live in

it's a strange

romantic place

Jam Bands Bad said...

AYHSMB = All You H8ers Suck My Balloon

Anonymous said...

Fifty-Fifthy! Deuces. AllYouHatersSuckOnMyFives

Anonymous said...

Wow, the guy who updates the Occupy Wall Street site really needs to learn some basic rules of English about run ons and using verbs: we were awoken? What?

wishiwasmerckx said...

I was planning on reinforcing my comment on innumeracy, but panino beat me to the punch.

wishiwasmerckx said...

That video ain't exactly the 1968 Democratic Convention in Chicago, you know. Somewhere, Jerry Rubin is spinning in his grave.

Anonymous said...

As a whip-it connoisseur back before the Weiner Dog of Time was a legitimate unit of measurement, I can assure you that nitrous oxide is actually heavier than air and therefore actually "lowers" one's voice, when one speaks as it is exhaled. In Nigeria the sale of Nitrous Oxide is unregulated, and a college roommate who went into the oil business successfully procured an entire "welding torch" size canister for a "company picnic", and full-size garbage bags were used to huff the stuff. Even better, he successfully got his boss to try it, making the cost a legitimate business deduction. That is all.

wishiwasmerckx said...

I own an absolutely beautiful tweed suit, and the idea of soiling it with sweat and bicycle grease turns my stomach.

Some of the top-end cycle clothing companies can actually sew in a replacement panel if you fall and tear your lycra shorts, but so far as I know, Burberry offers no such program for its tweed suits.

Anonymous said...

Premium Rush? Phooey. I'll be busy watching Rad.

asfas a said...

aklsfj aslfkj as

mikeweb said...

the amateur videographer told the blog, New York Shitty. “It was total mayhem. It was a horror show and I was afraid for my safety while filming.”

Umm, is she talking about the posted video? Because is seems her definition of 'horror show' and 'afraid for my safety' are a tad exaggerated. That Merchant- Mayweather post-fight interview, now THAT'S about being afraid for your safety.

Seems suitable then that it was a Widespread Panic concert. Indeed.

Anonymous said...

November 19th - Philly Tweed Ride! Be there and/or be square. My daughter and I are polishing our raleighs.

http://tweedride.phlbikes.com/

cycle

streepo said...

Polishing your raleighs? Is that what you kids are calling it today?

db said...

"The Tweed Run is an event that sees cyclists of all ages dressed in timeless period attire..."

Um, NO. Your "timeless period attire" is an inadvertent oxymoron, which makes you a regular moron. "Timeless" is the exact opposite of "woollen [sic] plus fours, Harris Tweed jackets, flat caps", etc. I'm tired of people using this word as a douche-ified version of "classic". Or, perhaps, "self-pleasuring".

If you're inclined to put quill to parchment in order to issue a pressing release, at least understand the goddamned words that you're using.

thymeless said...

"timeless period attire" makes no sense. if one's attire is from a distinct period in time, how can it also be "timeless?"

unless they are using timeless to mean "anachronistic," but then it's just redundant

might as well be "anachronistic retro vintage period attire from times past"

thymeless said...

db beat me to it

bikesgonewild said...

...They seek him here
they seek him there...
...his clothes are loud but never square...
...It will make or break him
so he's got to buy the best...
...'cos he's a dedicated follower of fashion...

...And when he does his little rounds...
...round the boutiques of London Town...
...eagerly pursuing
all the latest fads and trends...
...'cos he's a dedicated follower of fashion...
...

...what ???...hey, leave me alone...i'm just singing & it has nothing to do with anyone here...

...i just like ray davies & 'the kinks'...

mikeweb said...

Say what you will, but that protest video, and to a larger extent, the entire protest makes me proud to be an American.

At least they have the balls to exercise their first amendment rights against an industry that practically flushed our economy down the toilet instead of sitting on their asses at home playing Xbox for hours on end, watching an endless stream of shitty TV shows night after night(Oh, except Mike & Molly, I just LUV that show!! Ferealz!) or doing whip-its after some half-assed concert.

Morgan said...

Premium Rush: The Fast & the Furious with Bikes

xyxax said...

aren't sanitary napkins "timeless period attire"?

ce said...

Duder! Hi five bro, glad you're back. Sorry about the mess.

Smedley Van Nosehair said...

Ah yes, one is reminded of the days of nitrous oxide parties when we would huff the noxious gas and bang our heads into furniture, all whilst waiting for the internet to be invented.

CommieCanuck said...

Throw a tarp over something in NYC, it's a tent.
Put a box in it, that's an elevator, and you have a condo, $1.5M please.

GhostOfTyrone said...

@mikeweb -

Add another to the endless stream.

Jasper said...

Call me English, Anon @12:55, but I didn't hear anything amiss with awoken. Rather poetic in fact.

http://www.dailywritingtips.com/awoken-or-awakened/

grog said...

yes, she is a woman of distinction.

WEDT WEED
TIME TENT

wishiwasmerckx said...

Perhaps "timeless" was misused, but for those of you who are fashion-impaired (which includes virtually every cyclist of every variety), almost everything Brooks Brothers sells is "timeless."

Those khaki pants with the mallard ducks embroidered all over them are as timelessly unfashionable today as they were 20 years ago, and will be 20 years from now.

That's why I bought the khakis with the little sailfish embroidered all over them as well so that if the mallards came into fashion, I would still have something unfashionable to wear.

GhostOfTyrone said...

@ wiwm

My khakis have little embroidered people all over them.

Now word yet from the fashion police.

A Modest Proposal said...

Mr. Snob:

I've been watching you curate your blog for a while now and I would like to suggest that its time for you to apply for Biblical Tribe status. You know, the Snobberites or something like that. You already have the major players in place and a loyal, dedicated following. You've performed miracles, such as your recent Giving Away of Free Things. You just need to explain the relationship between Lob and Jeebus or Jeebus and Lob, whichever the case may be, work out a decent eschatology, and you're right there. If accepted into the club you could then issue decrees and edicts against these Tweederites, Fixiites, etc and have some real teeth to bite them with. Your followers would do most of the work, of course, so it wouldn't inconvenience you too much to be leader...that's a real plus. Consider the potential financial rewards as well.

Well, I gotta go.

CommieCanuck said...

Snobberites are already in the bible, see St. Tulio's readings to the Campagnolians in the olde Testament. Fixies are mentioned as the "steeds of the Philistines".
"One day, the prophet shall return and he shall bear a twelve speed cassette".
Note Jebus had 12 apostles, not ten.

Anonymous said...

NOT THE BEES!

Anonymous said...

Snobberati

Ensign Oates said...

C.R.E.P.?

bikesgonewild said...

...commiecanuck is onto somefin here...

...campagnolo, a deity unto itself, is already @ 11 (shut up, nigel - we know, we know) & while shimano has attracted many fanatical followers, it's a relatively new religion...

...i'm gonna go out & ride my campy 10 today (hey, i'm not so high & mighty as to afford 11) & look for 'signs'...

...is it the 'second coming' ???...is it the lobpocalypse ???...is it 'huret' making a comeback...

...will we all go down to the river, joining hands & casting our fixies unto the troubled waters ???...

...fuck, stay tuned !!!...

Shambles said...

Society for
Nitrous
Oxide
Balloons

Anonymous said...

Speaking of scruffy protesters, you should check out the space hijackers not cricket site, there are instructions on how to properly tie a bow tie and a rant about bloomin' scruffy crusty protesters:

http://www.spacehijackers.org/notcricket/html/frames.htm

Nebraska bike commuter (non-DWI edition) said...

Cucumber sandwiches make me burp.

I am a religious engine said...

Canuk is making stuff up, jebus had 13 apostles, therefore campy will skip 12 and go right to 13.

And so it was written, because you know 13 is always the best.

Rudy Gonzalez said...

artasamurderweapon

Fred's dead baby, Fred's dead... said...

Please Lob let Premium Rush be put out on general release. The kind of film I need to see in a theatre.

I'm going to go to watch it dressed in tweed on a crabon firby fixed with risers - now THAT'S irony.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Ghost of Tyrone, I am guessing that they embroidered little WHITE people all over your trousers; am I correct?

wishiwasmerckx said...

Snob gets to name his tribe from among the following:

-Amelekites
-Philistines
-Hittites
-Edomites
-Ammonites

Marcel Da Chump said...

Another "a modest proposal"?

The first one proposed cannibalism to eliminate poverty.

(Whoa...where did I get that?)

wishiwasmerckx said...

BSNYC, yesterday at my LBS, I was discussing cyclocross with the resident Belgian transplant, and when I mentioned Ritte bikes (rhymes with "tittie"), he said "Ritte" (rhymes with "tit").

As an owner, do you have any pronunciation advice so as to avoid future embarrassment?

I know to call Greenwich Village "grenitch,"and Houston Street "husston," but I do not know how to pronounce "Ritte." As an ultimate arbiter of cycling style, we look to you for guidance.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Marcel, is that Soylent Green I smell? Polly want a cracker...

Marcel Da Chump said...

wiwm, don't tell me soylent green is people.

It's people? It's people!!!

BTW, the locals pronounce it houseton

wishiwasmerckx said...

Marcel, you say potato, I say potatoe...

wishiwasmerckx said...

Oh, and by the way, 100th!

Marcel Da Chump said...

wiwm, fuggedaboutit--I say potatoe.

Anonymous said...

Joined Twidder, I see.....

hey nonny mouse

bikesgonewild said...

...oh yah ???...i say freedom fries'...

Anonymous said...

"aren't sanitary napkins "timeless period attire"?"

No, they're timely rather than timeless......

hey nonny mouse

bikesgonewild said...

...nonny mouse...it got lost in the 30,000 comments posted while bsnyc/rtms/wcrm was away but several of us wanted to know - were you implying that you do 24hr auto racing in a deux chevaux ???...this implies you are either tougher than all of us put together or maybe just crazier (than is obvious)...'...

GhostOfTyrone said...

@ wiwm

Huh? I've always preferred forrest green...

wishiwasmerckx said...

Ghost of Tyrone, call me a skeptic, but I have a hard time believing that Brooks Brothers would include any people of color anywhere in their clothing line, even in the forest green colorway.

GhostOfTyrone said...

@wiwm

Ah, yeah. You got me. I can only afford the knock offs from Jos. A Bank.

But they really get me in that "Autumnal mood."

Anonymous said...

Eschatology?

WTF? I'm in the wrong blog...

rural 14 said...

ant 2nd!

24 hour racing in a 2cv would be far more than 24 hours, non?

Bisso said...

If you want the latest in dandy cycling attire do not go here:


http://tweedcycling.com/

Nebraska bike commuter (non-DWI edition) said...

If you're endurance racing in a 2Cv, would a big ol' bottle of Dramamine be a part of your racing kit?

kinski said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6bQG1PD2Vk

fixies are still cool in the hip hop world

Darwin said...

People of color?
Who painted them?
That implies people
lacking in color
are bleached.
And who did that?

The Bike Douche' said...

-VELO NEWSFLASH-

-INSIDE INFO-

Shimano is about to unveil it's new top gruppo aimed at the tri-dork DDS crowd

Dura Ace Hole

Anonymous said...

Ye would not marry a Hittite woman, would ye? Or a Snobberite woman, or anything like that, would ye?

tribal douche said...

We must conquer
the fixlistines.
Drive them
out of Brookbylon!

Tribal said...

I used to be of the Samnite tribe but, under Snob's influence, I have recently changed to the Salmonite tribe. It is a much funner tribe to be in.

a tribe called douche said...

I'm donning my tweeds
and joining the Tweedites.

g-roc said...

timeless period attire...tweed smells suspiciously similar to oxymorons.

It's definitely between Tuesday and Saturday.

The Apostle BillyBob said...

I'm a full fledged member of the Samsonite tribe.

tribalism said...

Hipsterites on nitrous oxide
loitering in Williamsburg
watching the girls run by.

Bozo the hipster said...

Dude, don't bogart that balloon.

leroy said...

Sorry I missed the lead out to 100 comments.

I was distracted by a singing racoon who was explaining that Wagner's Ring Cycle isn't a bike shop.

You can learn a lot from a hallucination.

Even if it isn't one of those Carlos Castenada type Teachings of Don Juan moments.

bikesgonewild said...

...ya know, leroy, that whole carlos castenada thing is way overblown & much too open to interpretation but when a singing raccoon tells you what's up, well, THAT'S what up...

...you're on the right track, amigo...

Richard Dreyfuss said...

Krippendorf's tribe?

Wikipedia said...

When one is ordained into the Lobbite Orthodox Church, the candidate must begin the ritual by crawling up the aisle toward the altar while reciting the 52 Blasphemies, one of which is Hipsterism.

BrainDonor said...

Brompton is the new 'fixie' on the streets of Manchester http://youtu.be/G62gRmdIBY0

Anonymous said...

I'm suprised that in the year 2011, a tape recorder is still used. Or at least according to the drug orgy article. Ridiculous.

wp said...

GOTSTA

have a recumbabe tee!

Burt Columbus MXL said...

Anon 7:36

I guess I missed the memo about not using tape recorders any longer. I have a couple of good ones, which still work just fine, and I use them occasionally. It's actually quicker, easier, and more convenient than any digital recording format I have at my disposal.

Now I've got to clean out my closets and go buy some trendy clothes. Sheesh.

JB said...

Ritt'-eh
?

Anonymous said...

A little Wednesday tweed and a premium relish sandwich is all it takes! Thanks Snob for making me laugh my freaking mind out on a daily basis.

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