Secontly, as you may know, last night was the premiere of the much-anticipated Travel Channel show about people who make deliveries by bicycle, "Triple Rush:"
I must admit that I was dreading this--mostly because, given the bicycle backlash here in New York City, I figured the last thing we needed was for a show about how crazy messengers are to fart on the flames of everybody's apparent hatred for anybody on a bike. However, while it did contain some genuinely cringe-inducing riding, overall I thought the show was pretty good, and it was certainly about a thousand times smarter than your typical fixie hillbombing video or Internet messenger "documentary." Anyway, I three-quarter-heartedly recommend it.
Thirdally, I'm very pleased to announce that today something amazing happened. Yes, after weeks and weeks, the moment I've been waiting for finally arrived. Some days I thought for sure it was going to happen and it didn't, while other days the entire enterprise seemed futile. But now all of that is in the past, and nothing can change the fact that I have officially attained my hard-won goal:
I finally ran out of olive oil.
Why am I so happy I ran out of olive oil? I'll tell you why. Because that meant I could finally crack open my giant can of genuine Andy Hampsten-imported Extra Virgin Olive Oil:
Note that I've included both a pair of Fred-tastic Oakley M-Frames and a bag of my own coffee blend for scale. As you can see, that's one "epic" can of oil. The first thing I did upon opening the can was hoist it to my lips and take a mighty slug from it, and as that sublimely viscous liquid dribbled from my chin and down the front of my "Star Wars" pajamas, I knew right away that this was the best olive oil I'd ever tasted. I'm no olive oil "noob," either--I'm used to the good stuff. In fact, before this I was using an exotic olive oil from a region in Italy called "Canola," and compared to Hampsten's stuff that Canola crap doesn't even taste like olive oil at all.
Finerly, speaking of the New York City bicycle backlash, this morning I was watching Pat Kiernan on NY1, who mentioned the following story about a woman who received a ticket from the NYPD for carrying a tote bag on her handlebars:
Amazing. If there was any remaining question that New York City is officially striving to become the most bicycle-unfriendly city in America and thus transform itself into the bizarro Portland, this should lay it to rest once and for all.
And with that, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right you'll know, and if you're wrong you'll see an "epic old man."
Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and I look forward to seeing you again when I return on Tuesday, April 26th.
1) Which is not an actual quote from the comments section of fashion blogger The Situationalist's post about bike locks as fashion accessory?
--"...in the girl's bike you can notice a small piece of paper in the front wheel it's a sort of a ticket you get when you go to alleycats, semi-secret races for fixed fanatics"
2) Politician Charlie Crist recently apologized to David Byrne for suggesting that Byrne owns a car.
3) Where did the "first-ever cycle crime" take place?
4) Folding bicycle manufacturer Brompton is "dropping" a William and Kate royal wedding "collabo" bike.
5) Thanks to the "VelEau," you can now drink from your:
6) Finally! It's a:
--Saddlebag you can drink from
--"Filth prophylactic" you can sit on
--Saddle you can eat out of
(Via Cycling Inquisition)
***Special Reader-Forwarded Extraordinarily Phallic Aerobar-Themed Bonus Question***