Friday, November 19, 2010

BSNYC Friday "Cat 6" Throwdown!

Thanks to both the Internet and the fact that the "bike culture" is more intent on documenting itself than any other group of people in the history of the world, including the Nazis, there is now a stupendous number of cycling-themed videos available for viewing. While by now everybody's aware of certain cycling video genres, such as the fixed-gear freestyle "edit," the artfully-filmed Rapha "epic," or the pointless track bike trip to nowhere, other genres are all too often overlooked. One of these unjustly neglected forms is the offroad recumbent video, which in terms of using bicycles ill-suited to their purpose makes fixed-gear freestyling look positively graceful in comparison. I happen to be a huge fan of the offroad recumbent genre, and this is one of my favorites:



The best part of this video is the captions, which provide perspective and insight for the non-recumbent rider. Sure, you may think that section of trail is more or less straight, but it's not when you're riding a 'bent:

And what happens when there actually is a turn that's discernible to the naked eye, such as this gentle, sweeping left-hander?

Well, that's what's known as a "recumbent hairpin."

Combine that with an ever-so-slight incline and it can be a recumbent rider's undoing:

On the other hand, fixed-gear video "curators" have simply gotten complacent and lazy, since the latest craze seems to be videos where nothing happens at all, like this one I saw at the "Trackosarusrex" blog:

BIKE CHECK 212 | 03 ROMEO REX from cycleangelo on Vimeo.

As far as I can tell, the entire plot of this video is "I have a Cannondale," as though that's some sort of feat that's worthy of attention. Apparently this excites a lot of people, too, since this has been posted on various blogs, and has also presumably inspired comments on Internet forums such as, "Did you see that video where the guy has a Cannondale? Sick! I love it when they show the cog." I guess the subtext of the video is that simply owning a certain type of bicycle is in itself an accomplishment, though I'm not sure why, unless your goal is to show off your "mad eBay skillz." I would totally watch videos of people gleefully showing off their offroad recumbents though, for the same reason I enjoy watching Pee-Wee Herman showing off his breakfast machine.

Og með að ég er ánægður með að kynna þér quiz. Eins og alltaf kanna lið, hugsa og smella á svar þitt. Ef þú ert rétt að þú munt vita, og ef þú ert að rangt þú sérð reiðhjól kapp.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and whether you ride horizontally, vertically, or at some angle in between, ride happy.


--BSNYC/RTMS





1) Team Sky's approach to racing in 2010 was:







(The Recumbent History Channel logo)

2) In recumbent circles (or, more accurately, horizontal ovals) April 1st, 1934 is known as:






3) Recumbents are great for offroad riding:






(Unicycles, recumbents...if only someone would invent a riding machine that married the practical upright seating position of the unicycle with the more stable two-wheeled design of the recumbent. Oh well, I guess it will never happen.)

4) A unicyclist is suing the NYPD for:

--Arresting him for public juggling without a permit
--Ticketing him for riding on the sidewalk
--Berating him with clown slurs and throwing a pie in his face (or "police slapstick brutality")





5) This is not a purse. [Ahem.] It is a:






("We're here! We're self-involved and inordinately trendy people with expensive liberal arts educations! Get used to it!")

6) In a shocking instance of anti-hipster discrimination, a Los Angeles "food stylist" was recently pulled off a commercial flight for having a set of knuckle tattoos reading "ATOM BOMB."





("I don't care how hungry I am, if it's poorly styled I ain't eating it.")

7) In a shocking example of irony, in the United States of America, you can apparently make a good living as a "food stylist."




***Special "Oh, Portland..."-Themed Bonus Question***


Fill in the blanks: "Will __________ for ______."




98 comments:

samh said...

Throwing down.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

no comment!

Astroluc said...

podium?!

samh said...

Er Internet brotinn?

samh said...

Það brotinn Internet?

Esteemed Commenter DaddoOne said...

sex!

samh said...

t3h 1337 |\?3tz h4><0r3|>?

Erik said...

Allt sem þú haters sjúga punginn minn

shoegazer said...

whap!

Anonymous said...

Boo !

mikeweb said...

Laid back.

samh is back with a vengeance.

Esteemed Commenter DaddoOne said...

girl in blue t-shirt at :36 is thinking, that's right, you guessed it: "Douche"

I know because I get that look all the time - maybe I should lose the music system on my commuter?

S.K. said...

Samh, get a job.
The typing in tongues made my naked lady box cry.

Van Beardswick said...

Is it just me laughing about the musical choices in the 'bent video? Maybe BSNYC didn't comment beacuse the tunes were unremarkably consistent with the 'bent lifestyleway.

Slappy said...

sweet motherLob that triathaunicycle is rippn 'bent shredders would love telluride, sweet climb out the front door on singletrack up to 12,012 lots of switchbacks and a shred alert back down to 87

Anonymous said...

cannondale i thought it was "crack-and-fail"?

Marc said...

lol, that off-road recumbent guy is local to us. "Albion" is where we have our Tuesday Night series in the summer. He even rides that thing at 24 Hour races...

samh said...

I wasn't even trying today. AYHSMB.

Anonymous said...

You can't say that proud Cannondale owner is not a poser.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Honored to be your lead out samh.

Gap Rap Whap! said...

Damn it ! No matter how lite my messenger bag it's not making me faster in the commentary sprints! WTF to do??
Maybe I need more 4 Loco in my stylish waterbottle...

PawnShop said...

Naked lady box. Part of every balanced breakfast.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

I think Jim inbako said it best in yesterdays comments:
Jim inbako said... After I demonstrate to her how a recumbent works we go to my place for laid back sex.

hillbilly said...

have a good weekend yall

ervgopwr said...

Does recumbent sex also involve poor handling 'off road' and the in ability to go uphill fast?

Not to mention beards, flags and spd sandals?!

Anonymous said...

Im so heckling you this weekend...

TestostoJones McMeatstick said...

ReCUMbents are so submissively cather gay! I mean really dudes!

Anonymous said...

Snob- almost died choking on my artisanally curated Itailian sub over the "recumbent history channel" logo .... Just beautiful!!

Anonymous said...

Recumbant vids = crying lady box

Is there a medical reason that people ride recumbants? I just don't get it.

ben said...

Singletrack is not a recumbents strong point.

yofilly said...

Sometimes I read you blog and feel stupid and embarrassed that I ride a bike. I'm normally a happy person, but I really wanted to punch Mr. Cannondale in the face.

Happy weekend, everyone. The weather looks lovely. Go ride your bike without arrogance and smugness and make the world a happier place.

And punch that guy in the face if you see him.

Anonymous Coward said...

I'm not whether to cry or celebrate my 100% on the quiz.

Anonymous said...

fanny packs are for doods with beards
that give 'fanny pack' creampies

Anonymous said...

Funky!

Stvn said...

No search results on youtube for “recumbent bunnyhop" or "recumbent bunny hop"

Has it been done?

also, mildly related - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quER8_tjI6Q

Anonymous said...

putting your balls on the line...GPV

all bunch of late eighties bmx doods started doing this
it is like the reverse cowboy of recumbent

newer clip...some old ones if you hit the vision street wear videos

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dcPEP2iTrw0

Tyler's Chimera said...

So I bought and built up Lance's fourth hand racing frame. I am a dual nutted individual. Lance's frame most definately pulls to the right indicating that Lance is sans his left nut.

Just think about it? Not being able to give your left nut for anything, ever!

Oh the inhumanity of it all!

J. Alfred Doucherock said...

That is not what I meant at all. That is not it, at all.

Willem said...

Philly fun cross weekend Dec. 18th

http://xmascrossandmtbfollies.blogspot.com/


http://www.bilenky.com/News_%26_Rumors.html

its gonna be good.

ant1 said...

ant1st!

ant1 said...

perfect quiz score.

nice work samh.

damn, and a 'bent in second place, must have been a flat quiz.

g said...

You can ride a recumbent off-road, but why? There is a mighty big gap between can and should, in my opinion. Then again, I really hate wearing a beard and helmet mirrors. Ride well and as you want.

smelly said...

Checked out the manpurse at the Chari and Co website, and linked to the Brooklyn Machine Works fixes.

It is sad to see how far a once awesome company has fallen, without a Pacific Cycles buy-out.

In fact, I think GT is currently producing cooler products than BMW.

Butthead said...

huh huh...fanny pack cream pies

He said pack cream

Anonymous said...

samh...please change your avatar to a dr suess character
you are creeping me out!

grog said...

enjoyed reiðhjól kapp

yogisurf said...

I could put the out of work lady to work for 10 minutes...OK, only 3....

Anonymous said...

Yeah, the reiðhjól kapp was pretty awesome.

crosspalms said...

48th! Took me a while to recover from the bent hairpin.

RANTWICK said...

I love it when they show the cog...

So good.

Good weekends all.

ringcycles said...

7/7 on the quiz, but I failed the bonus. Portland still confounds me.

Like why anyone would even try to ride a recumbent on singletrack. What's next, uni-cycle 'cross? oops. sorry PDX

Anonymous said...

Riding a recumbent on a mountain trail must be like trying to eat steak with a spoon. With enough effort you might be able to do it, but why?

H

electric recumbent rider... said...

Recumbent off-roading is stupid in my opinion.... but then so is "riding" a cyclocross bike off-road. Let he who is without inappropriate bicycle use cast the first aerospoke, because it isnt me...

It all comes down to fun on bicycles at the end of the day...

Glad you looked into the UCI ban after my last post, even if you did kind of miss the point... how about the UCI ban on small wheels after Moulton started winning stuff, and why the hell would they ban disc brakes that could potentially save lives? Oh yes, because nobody likes design and engineering to steal the limelight from drug use and bitchiness...

John said...

Think that unemployed young lady would take a burrito from me?

PORT LAND said...

Started my trackstand just before samh showed up but now I'm getting chilly. Time to head inside for that free coffee.

Anonymous said...

Where's Bjork?

Fiskins said...

You don't ride a recumbent, rather you captain one!

Udder said...

Z= recumbent N.

Guðríður Aðalgeirsdóttir said...

EPIC POST

Anonymous said...

30 minutes huh? I'm doing that contest when I visit family in PDX this Winter. I won't have anything else to do.

Anonymous said...

100% Italian Pedigree! Ride your ARTtoWork! Be Cool!

http://www.maxlellibikes.com/wallstreeter.aspx

ben said...

@ Fiskins Fo Sho!

db said...

Who's going to tell Captain C-dale that they spelled "tarck" wrong on his frame?

Dan O said...

I wanna see freeride recumbents.

Next Red Bull event idea?

Anonymous said...

Um, there have been food stylists in America for about 50 years now. Which is 49 years longer than one has been able to make a decent living as a sarcastic bike blogger. This is the first you've heard of them (us)?

So, okay, I'll out myself for the sake of the other commentators on this here blog. I'm a food stylist and have been one for 10 years. I don't qualify as a hipster douchebag or have knuckle tattoos. My tattoos are not in plain sight and don't cause me to get kicked off of airplanes. I do, however, have a wife and kids to support and therefore need to work. Should I become a literary agent, supping at the teat of the creativity of those I "represent"? Or should I have chosen another path, say, brain surgeon? Like many in the media, I make fake shit up so I can support myself. There are waaaaaay less respectable fields to be in in these confusing times.

BTW, I'm also a regular reader of your blog and have your book - I didn't just show up here to defend my job. I think, because my line of work clearly does not take less fortunate people into consideration, I'll be cramming my copy of Book Snob into the change cup of the next homeless person I see. Good charity.

xoxo
Lone Wolf

Comment not deleted said...

This post has not been removed by the author.

Anonymous said...

So, LW, this the first time Bike Snob has insulted you? Half of us come here just to get our feelings hurt. Anyway, if it's okay to make fun of Lunch Lady Doris, then you are fair game too.

Bjartur of Summerhouses said...

SAEL PROF

Anonymous said...

I have a beard and a helmet mirror. Do I have to get a recumbent now too?

Aw, rats.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Comment not deleted -Hey nice to see that you... have no comment.

BikeSnobNYC said...

"Lone Wolf,"

I think one of my favorite movie quotes applies here:

"It's not meant to be taken literally. It refers to any manufacturers of dairy products."

I hope you'll keep the book, you may enjoy it.

--BSNYC

Anonymous said...

Why would you need two brake levers on a unicycle????

wishiwasmerckx said...

I just think it is bizarre that anybody makes a living putting marbles in a bowl of soup so that the veggies float to the top in order to appear more appetizing for the photographer.

My next job? Labia wrangler for porn photo shoots.

John said...

What's the provenance of that photoshopped unicycle?

Anonymous said...

Rapha is still missing an "epic" shopping/beer run to the local store in fashionable Rapha attire video story.

Vegas said...

Lighten up, Lone Salad Dresser. I'm sure the chip on your shoulder is quite large from everyone everywhere laughing at your chosen profession all the time, but there's no need to take out your feelings of inadequacy on BS. And how about a few more a's in "way"? Sure there are multitudes of less respectable jobs, but not many more silly ones.

Much luv to anon 6:51.

cwg said...

You gotta give props to that guy. I broke my collarbone at albion last year on an orthodox, bikesnob-approved, '02 Rockhopper.

leroy said...

Dear Lone Wolf --

Food stylists in America for the past 50 years you say?

OMG! Now I understand that classic New Yorker cartoon with the kid glaring at the plate of chard and observing "I say it's spinach and I say to hell with it"!

And I, for one, would welcome some professional tips on how best to present the half dozen foot long Turkey subs I plan to serve my in-laws next Thursday. Is there a way to arrange pickle chips so they suggest Pilgrim hats?

Am I wrong in thinking that a bed of Cool Ranch Doritos suggests autumn leaves?

Ride stylish all!

(LW -- I keed, I keed.)

Anonymous said...

Dear airline hostess,

It's not an atom bomb.

I'm just happy to see you.

Anonymous said...

I bought two copies of BSNYC's book.
One for each bathroom.

ttv said...

Wow! That's an amazing cyclist.

Anonymous said...

Best post in a while. The c-Dale comments made throw up bit of my $8 latte.

Anonymous said...

Pie should always be served with whipped cream!

Yo Mama said...

If you spend a lot of time reading the Performance Bicycle catalog, does that count as Scatology?

frilly said...

Leroy, try using the toothpicks with the colored cellophane on the tops. And I was thinking a mix of harvest cheddar and tomato salsa sunchips might be more autumnal, though the cool ranch doritos are tastier.

I am a uci hater engine said...

"Oh yes, because nobody likes design and engineering to steal the limelight from drug use and bitchiness..."

fucking brilliant.

You apparently have confused the UCI with logical individuals. Remember "It is not about the bike"

Neal Anderthal said...

That TT unicyclist appears to have fired off both of his butt rockets at some point before the photo was taken. I wonder what kind of gyro-controlled segway system that thing uses to keep it from reacting violently when those things go off. Yessir, that is one sophisticated machine. I just hope the tri geeks don't attempt to use them. Or if they do, someone is there with a video camera.

djdp said...

excellent!

Strider Prebike said...

woooouwwww...
I Like it's picture..
hehehee...

Pontius Pilate said...

HAIL CSZR

-P.P.

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petrospetros said...

As a long-time owner of a full-suspension recumbent, I was incapacitated with laughter by the 'off-road recumbent' video and your critique of it. You're right - those captions ("tight for a recumbent") make it, not to mention your assertion that it makes fixed-speed cyclocross "positively graceful"! Priceless!

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Fixie Bikes said...

I'd wanna see the meatmen live in concert.

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