Friday, November 14, 2008

BSNYC Friday Fun Quiz!

Before we begin, I feel it is my duty to keep you apprised of the Chris King Headset Composite Index:


The good news is that volume has increased, and the CKHCI is up from last week's low of 67. But the bad news is that the index remains low at just above 70:

While any uptick is encouraging, it remains to be seen how things will play out as we move into the holiday buying season.

Moving on, I've prepared a quiz in order to further dampen your enthusiasm as we move into the weekend. As always, study the question carefully and choose your answer. If you're right you'll see the item or some other confirmation that you're correct. If you're wrong, you'll see part I of the episode of "Family Ties" in which Alex P. Keaton gets addicted to speed.

Also, please note that, as usual, this quiz contains a melange of material, some of which I came across myself and some of which was forwarded by readers. I just want to take this opportunity to thank the many readers who send me links and photos. Please know that, while I'm not always able to respond, I'm always grateful to receive it and I consider myself very fortunate to receive so much email, even when it is somewhat disturbing.

Good luck, thanks for reading, and ride safe this weekend.

--BSNYC/RTMS

1) What lies beneath the tarp in Opinionated Cyclist's latest video?

--Green beans

--Yellow moons

--Orange stars

--Dead bodies


2) The Agency for Cycling Ethics (ACE) has:

--Named Jonathan Vaughters to its Board of Directors

--Added "wheelsucking" to its list of ethics violations

--Won the coveted "Golden Stream" award from the American Urinalysis Society

--Gone belly-up




3) According to a recent Seattle Times article, what may signal the death of the bike messenger?

--New and prohibitively strict insurance requirements

--Court system e-filing

--A statewide ban on self-righteousness

--The rise of the Mogo scooter messenger




4) What is this?

--A great armada of refuse, plying the Hudson Street bike lane under a gloved masthead

--A new Terry Gilliam film shooting in Manhattan

--Part of a citywide bike lane cleanup program

--The morning after yet another Transportation Alternatives soirée


5) Who can come to S.P.I.N. (Super Power Inclusion Night) at the Derailer Bicycle Collective in Denver?

--"Wimmin"

--The "gender queer"

--"Anyone...who is excluded by the patriarchy of bike culture and bike shops because of their gender identity"

--All of the above



6) What is this?

--The final destination for a great armada of refuse

--The set of a new Terry Gilliam film

--Chez BSNYC

--Bigvalueguy World Headquarters, located in the Republic of Texas



7) Cipo's back!

--True

--False


8) What is VeloNews technical editor Lennard Zinn's advice to a rider with a scuff on his Dura Ace crank?

--Get over it

--Get over yourself

--Home anodization

--Crank replacement




9) According to old crappy 10-speed expert Cameron, when it comes to old crappy 10-speeds shoddy cyclocross conversions may be the new shoddy fixed-gear conversions.

--True

--False


***Special NOT SAFE FOR WORK bonus question***
(Warning: no good can come of answering this question correctly.)

How do you know when a man is waaay too excited about his new Sora-equipped road bike?

--The crotchal region of his half-shorts is distended

--He is slavering copiously

--He has taken a photograph of himself with it in flagrante delicto

--It is impossible to be excited about a Sora-equipped road bike

114 comments:

libertyonbikes! said...

top ten?

Anonymous said...

1st!

Anonymous said...

shit...2nd

Anonymous said...

top 5

shabbat shalom said...

FORE SKIN

libertyonbikes! said...

dec 1st register for team fatty!
it's gonna be pink in philly...

Joseph said...

top ten first time...for bsnyc.

octopus magic said...

Riding fixed with no brakes :(

Daddo said...

eightium!

Eudocimus albus said...

yabai

mander said...

Mand11th

Critical Ass said...

It's great that S.P.I.N. differentiates between "gender queer" and "just plain weird". I think those of us in the latter category tend to fit perfectly into the "patriarcy of bike culture and bike shops".

Well.... up to a point

Bill said...

CIPO DIUM

Anonymous said...

f-quizes!

anon1st!

Anonymous said...

f-quizes!

anon1st!

Cool The Kid said...

Bigvalueguy's headquarters also double as a hub in the nation's growing meth lab network

ant1 said...

ant1st!

wishiwerepithy said...

Thanks for the fair warning on the last question. Now I have all weekend to consider whether to look at that link. Or to do other things.

Surly Bastard said...

Took a beating on this Quiz. Practically nothing right except for the crappy 10 speed conversion guess.

Nice to come in right after Ant1st though.

First loser?

Anonymous said...

I love how the Super Power Inclusion Night excludes a large number of people. That's progress!

Mike D said...

I've given some of my old bikes to the Derailer before... they're good people.

Anonymous said...

Geeezaaass. Everytime something about OC comes up, man, I just get spooked child molester style. If he has a conversion van I am SOOOO gettting a warrant! I mean, the hoodie, glasses, obsessive filming of himself pontificating (akin to self gratifying) and the out n out obsessiveness is just a little too dark and dank basement for me.

Pesty said...

I have a problem with the CKHCI.

The index does a great job of showing us the average cost per unit sold (ACUS), but does not account for volume. Dare I say that 20 headsets going at a ACUS of $70 would reflect a much better economy than 5 sold at a ACUS of $80.

Just my 2¢.

Sprocketboy said...

Thanks to Messrs.Snob and Zinn, I am looking forward to spending the weekend doing some quality home anodization. Having done amazingly well on the quiz, I feel that I have truly spun the Cassette of Predestination! So bring on the acid tubs...

Commiecanuk said...

So the ACE is dead. Just in time for Lance's comeback.

"Our position at this point is that we closed this year due to our financial model and we will have no further comment," he said.

I guess the model of fixing test samples and supplying drugs with proceeds to a Swiss bank account just doesn't work any more in the dirty 2000's.

Who'd of thought there was no money in a bullshit agency to make your racing team look clean?

Commiecanuk said...

I have both of Zinn's books and recommend them, but man, sometimes this guy forgets to put down the bong when answering mails.

He led a three month wankfest on tubular versus clincher tires, which is one of those questions that will never have a right answer. It's easier to figure out the whole Israel/Palestine thing.

About one third of his "tech tips" are corrections for really stupid advice he gave the week before. Correction: urine is NOT a good chain lubricant

Matt! said...

Not the longing I'd like to see again. Oh my.
Safe riding everyone!!

Anonymous said...

bigvalueguy has 100% positive rating with over 11,000 feedbacks received. That says something...

Anonymous said...

I bet Lance has an ACE in the hole.

Nick said...

For the record. These here quizzes are way too easy to cheat at.

Commiecanuk said...

wishiwerepithy said...
Thanks for the fair warning on the last question. Now I have all weekend to consider whether to look at that link. Or to do other things.


For God's sake, do something else, like start a list of better things to do than look at a pasty white guy's lycra-covered woody.

[shudder] I wish I took the blue pill and would wake up as if it were all a bad dream.

Martin Van Nostrand said...

Anonymous said...
bigvalueguy has 100% positive rating with over 11,000 feedbacks received. That says something...


like..don't value the opinions of Texans.

Commiecanuk said...

Nick...cheating on the quizzes is just another example of our sick society and decaying moral values..see what happens when you vote for Obama?

Anonymous said...

Anyone going to the Fuck-Nut Huggers show this weekend?

Curtis Chorizali said...

so did that OC guy murder hookers or no? i need to know this.....

Strayhorn said...

Commiecanuck said He led a three month wankfest on tubular versus clincher tires, which is one of those questions that will never have a right answer.

Every now and then you stumble on someone on teh intratubes who seems to make sense. And then they do something like Zinn's tortured series on tires, which reminds you that everyone is a crank about something.

After the third article filled with copious data culled from various mechanical engineering texts, I kept following series in the same spirit as watching the EMTs carry the bodies out of a 15-car pileup.

Chris said...

I didn't finish the Opinionated Cyclist video. Is this guy well known? I admit I am relatively new the the cycling blog thing, but I don't get why people know him. He doesn't really talk about bikes. Or he didn't in the first two minutes. Other than something about riding in the street. Is he a farmer? I agree with Anon. 12:47 that he is way creepy. I feel like I have to go look at pictures of car crashes to sear his voice out of my head.
Good blogs this week though.

Lucky 7 said...

Pass.

Leonard Zinn - Whadda tool! He and OC have WAY too much in common.


A

Wade said...

is that ted haggard giving the thumbs up?

I remember that family ties episode. that was the one when AK rolls on speedily on his chair while multitasking. I can't believe I watched so much of that show but the lessons I took away from it were worth it.

frilly said...

libertyonbikes! count me in for Team Fatty! Good fun & a good cause for sure.

Commie, did ya hear Popo is back on board? Hail, hail, the gang's all here.

Anonymous said...

Those derailer collective clowns are worse than any shop I've ever been to. They're blessed with twice the self-righteousness and half the mechanical ability of any shop staffer. Maybe if they checked their attitude and quit asking for free shit from all the Denver shops (many of whom actually give back to the cycling community as a whole and don't segregate based on how 'alt' you claim to be) they wouldn't feel so marginalized.

gator joe said...

Hey, at least everything in Bigvalueguys main yard is neat and orderly!
Who knew OC was a gardener? I wonder if he bores his vegetables as much as he bored me with his pointless drone. I wonder where he lives? He's got a big back yard. The mid-west I suspect.

Commiecanuk said...

Strayhorn, it's just not a real innernets wanker discussion until you get the two prefaces:

"...as an engineer, I think..."
"...as a successful Cat 2 racer, I think..."

Jim said...

Hey, about that guy with the... um... frontal seat post unit in his shorts over Sora components - don't knock it until you've tried it. And if you like Sora, wait until you get a load of Alivio. I get shivers just thinking about those big, throbbing, bright red jockey wheels on Alivio derailers. (That's right, they're so down market, the derailers can't afford the fancy french spelling).

Sure, gettin' all het up about Shimano's low end stuff is the bicycling equivalent of beer goggle-enhanced "Go Ugly Early." But the thing you shouldn't forget, is "Go Ugly Early" is a successful strategy for a lot of people, some of the people I used to date included.

Jim the Douchebag
- Owning the Insult, Since Tuesday Anyhow


Ps. I was thinking that a suspicious looking greasy spot was under the tarp. Imagine my relief to find out it wasn't.

Commiecanuk said...

Yes, Popo's back... and the F1 team is back working on his high modulus carbon fiber walking cane.

I can see Astana now...
Popovych
Andreu
Landis
Armstrong
Hamilton
Beltran

Renamed, Astana*

Fuck the ACE.

Commiecanuk said...

Jim..Frilly..fair warning...don't come near me with any Campy Super Record components.
No, I didn't have an accident
Yes, I am glad to see you.

red neckerson said...

seems like today yor preaching to the choirs

Commiecanuk said...

Nick..i have to admit, while filling out the quiz...I used embryonic stem cells.

Critical Ass said...

Ever wonder what goes on INSIDE the Bigvalueguy trailer?

Critical Ass said...

It sounds like the next time Snob goes on a Snobbatical, several of us could put together a feature on the assclowns of "Denver Cycling Culture". Other cites (PDX?) could be featured on other days.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Commiecanuck, so now we know that 430 lbs. is the threshold to play the Canadian "get out of jail free" card. Better have another dozen Krispy Kremes. BTW, how much is 430 Canadian down here?

Leprechaun said...

To Anon 2:05,

My friend and I did Pedal the Peaks in 1990 when the Denver Spoke did mechanical support. My friend had a crash coming down the pass into Lake City. After getting his road rash worked on he took his bike to the DS mechanic. His response was "I'm not working on this piece of shit. Buy a new bike." Granted it was a POS but that guy and DS can suck my balls from now until eternity.

Wade said...

by the way, anyone here count themselves as a member of the bike culture patriarchy?

Commiecanuk said...

Gee..$430..these days, about US$21 and a free tonne of Alberta bitumen.

They'll just release that 430lb guy and put him under house arrest at Walmart, no one will notice.

430lb is 195 kg.

wade said...

is there any popularly recognized term that describes the slow draining of Tina Yothers' adorableness over the course of Family Ties' television run?

Slappy said...

WTF!! How the hell did you even find a picture like that.










That's my photo!!

Commiecanuk said...

Wade...it's called Yotherization Syndrome, I've been suffering YS since 1995.

GhostRider said...

[nerdalert]That's not the Bigvalueguy World Headquarters...that's a set from Kill Bill, volume 2. At least, the trailer is identical to the one that Budd and Ellie Driver met their demises in at the hands of The Bride.
[/nerdalert]

Commiecanuk said...

Wade ... YS is not to be confused with the disease that progressively increases your breast size as your hotness decreases until eventual death from vicodin overdose. Plato's syndrome.

-DPMS

mono_vs_stereo said...

Yotherization is closely related to the Brandis Scale.

It's a 1-5 scale of how badly embarassed you are for someone, for example:
1- "Ladybugs"
2- "Outside Providence"
3- "Sidekickst"
4- "Full House" (yeah, one episode, but it's "Full House" for shit's sake)
5- "SeaQuest" DSV

And why does anyone need that many greenbeans? Is that what OC feeds the hookers he keeps in his mom's basement before he butchers them?

Joe said...

The Bigvalueguy compound looked to me like Jonestown.

vegas kid said...

Commiecanuck, I cannot believe that you brought up Dana Plato. Before her untimely death, she worked at the place I get my dry cleaning done, presumably for minimum wage...I s**t you not.

wishiwasmerckx said...

So Joe, what flavor is the Kool-Aid today?

Oni said...

Okay, not to be a dick (which of course means I'm going to be), but that OC Dude is really ugly. I tried to watch some of his earlier Bikesnob rants and he's a strange one.

Commiecanuk said...

oni...not to be a dick either (oops, to late), but I'll take OC over shwinging Sora guy any day.

Anonymous said...

Leave the OC alone.
What'd he ever do to you, or the sex workers you've done business with?

Joe said...

wishiwasmerckx,

Cherry with a hint of almond.

Anonymous said...

Me too, commie.

He's got string beans and that other guy? Some sort of cherry-flavored Hammer Gel, maybe?

Anonymous said...

Flavor Aid

Kool Aid is for fat-ass pitchers.

Lord Batu said...

The good news is I'll probably never have any friends come back from Worlds to tell me they ran into some messenger from Seattle named Rainbow(?) that supposedly "knows" me from my days "cherry picking" in the Emerald City.

Surprised to hear there are only four bikers working at WA Leg these days... Makes me wonder if Tom's still sporting all that beer on Fridays?...

Chin up gang, you can always get a rack and a big ass bread pallet, some bungies and start delivering pizzas;-) The OGest messenger's rock it like that in DC...LOL!
Peace Seattle!
FatMad"Cherry Pickin"Ryan

dmitri fofonov said...

I am not sorrowful at absence of Cipo. Italians, as are French, are pampered overrated dyavuski-malchicki and are not to be missed at the Pro tour. Spanish of course are kicking ass as are Germans, Russians, Ukrainians, and when the Sissy French let us compete, Khazakhis. If not for vodka and perfectly safe and natural nutritional supplements Khazakhis are to be ruling world by now, or at least expeanding sphere of influence over Krim.

doppelganger said...

there can only be 1 conclusion, we are all getting a great big hint.
two clues in the same week.
OC is BSNYC/RTMS.
there he is talking to himself, pretending to care about green beans.

OCBS NYC.

red neckerson said...

i feel sorry for that feller because he has such a little dick

leroy said...

Whoa, I only missed the Leonard Zinn question.

I definitely need to get a life.

Ride safe all.

Daddo said...

Howdy: Is the seat posts missing any parts? Bill

Bwhahahahahhahahahahahaa!!!!

Daddo said...

Israel uses clinchers, right?

Cocks II: Electric Boogaloo said...

Personally I like that the model name of the seatpost is "Min Insert." I have the same one!!!111

Paul said...

I can't finish an OC video, i try, but i either start falling asleep, or try to kill myself...

wade said...

Recipe for Fancy bean casserole

pre heat oven to 350

sweat an onion and make a bechamel on top using the onion. put in twenty to forty swipes of nutmeg according to your fancy

clean up the green bean. blanch them three to five minutes depending if you like a little crunch or if you like less

caramelize three to four decent sized onions.

butter up a gratin pan. layer in the bechamel. layer some beans and caramelized onions on top. more bechamel. back and forth until you run out of beans and onions. finish with one last coat of bechamel.

make a bread topping with old bread or an overpriced baguette that you bought thirty minutes earlier, a little olive oil if you like, butter definitely and fresh chopped herbs (with a very sharp knife if you can), preferably thyme or savory or marjoram.

top your fancy beans with it. press it down a little into the bean bechamel mix.

cook covered for like thirty minutes or until it's semi-bubbling. just look at it. you'll see. finish uncovered or give it some broiling flame if you like the bread toasted.

serve with boudin noir or flank steak and gigondas or whatever swill you can afford

Anonymous said...

dead cat bounce!

Radko said...

Family Ties, Meredith had sooo much more to offer to a young masterbator than I, as a young khlab, realised back when. Now she is still hot.

Anonymous said...

jesus...bikesnob, watching his video was like listening to dustin hoffman in rainman...bikesnob, definitely, bikesnob, really bikesnob, like rainman, bikesnob...what an asshole.

rusty said...

Man, could OC say the word "bikesnob" any more frequently if he tried? He's just crazy enough to kill a hooker. I'll bet he has!

rusty said...

OH damn,
I hope that hooker comment doesn't lead to any more super-crappy videos.

Anonymous said...

a week of spot on, hilarious bikesnobbery, thanks and the comments are pretty fucking funny

SCORPIO said...

You have very nice blog to read and also please visit our website for getting more news about shipping thrugh our shipping directory and also you can use our Indian free classifieds to get more business inquiry.

http://www.shipie.com
http://www.kaisaa.com

Jay said...

I bought an old crappy ten speed for $10 when I lived in Ronkonkoma, then sold it for $100 when I moved to Berkeley, CA. I love trends.

Anquetil's Mother said...

Hey "wade"

fuck you but this is a respectable blog about CYCLING and so i must point out that Gigondas is NOT swill.

dammit, it's just not. There's a reason the Pope set up shop next door.

Anquetil's Mother said...

ok, so you never actually said Gigondas was swill itself, nevertheless, i am french, so the fuck you remains!

Vive le Rhone!

kale said...

That was the hardest quiz yet, and the last answer threw me off, because I thought that was how where your flat repair kit was supposed to go.

Live and learn.

DFL.

-EGMS

tex said...

Martin Van Nostrand said...
Anonymous said...
bigvalueguy has 100% positive rating with over 11,000 feedbacks received. That says something...

like..don't value the opinions of Texans.

November 14, 2008 1:17 PM


I would be offended by that remark, if I was a real Texan. But anyway, as obnoxious as Texans (real and fake) can be, please save your provincial insults for those who really deserve them. Like the French.

Grant said...

I never actually watched anything by OC until today, while taking the quiz. I never realized what a mindless country bumpkin he is, rambling on about biksnob for eight minutes like he doesn't have anything else to talk about. He probably maintains the OC life just so they don't start digging around in his garden. 'Secret Window', anyone?

Critical Ass said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Critical Ass said...

As we learned last week, gears are for queers. On my ride today, I did a couple of laps around the Cherry Creek Resevoir in full spandex clown drag. I think I found the Castro District of the mountain west. Everybody was out'n'proud with up to 30 gears. No 11 speed triples that I was aware of. Now that would be too gay.

Now that I realized how queer I am, I can go to S.P.I.N and not feel uncomfortable asking about a new jocky wheel for my squeaky Nuovo Record derailleur. If I were to go into a regular bike shop with the same question, I would be absolutely ridiculed. I might as well be asking for a chrome plated 18" double-headed dildo. The fact that I'm a full-time professional Donna Summer impersonator makes those rednecks at the LBS a little uneasy

Some Guy on the Innernets said...

Obama has Palin, Snobby has the OC. Plenty of bumpkins to go around, I guess.

Karl Rove said...

Bigvalueguy is using that aerial photo of the RNC National Headquarters without permission.

red neckerson said...

this thread aint going to get 100 posts without my help you sorry bastards when i was trucking i got in a spot where only some damm npr station was coimng over the radio and i was lisening to what do you know staring some jewboy named michael whatshis ass and all his audience are 70 year old hippys from madison who mades millions of dollars then retired and tell us all how great commonism is and they are all so damm smug it makes you want to reach into your radio and slap the shit out of them and for a moment it felt like i was surrounded by a room of commiecannucks thats what his posts are like in fact i bet commiecannnuck is a 70 year old hippy from madison which is close enuff to canada for me

red neckerson said...

fuck you too

tex said...

That was quite a sentence, Red! You didn't happen to attend Wasilla High, did you? Your sentence was better focused than what we are used to hearing from Wasilla alumni, but the similarity is still remarkable.

red neckerson said...

tex

wasilla high aint in my school district

if you was trying to be funny then fuck you

if you wasnt trying to be funny fuck you anyway

that gives us 100 posts on the nose now move on you smug bastard commonists

bikesgonewild said...

...ya know, tex...

...i'm bettin' the best sentence ol' red neckerson ever got off in his life was that 3 to 5 w/ time of for good behavior...

...i believe the restraining order still stands though...

...& speakin' of commies n' jews n' such, kinky friedman, the 'ol' kinksta', the 'original texas jewboy' sez "watch yer step & yer ass, if yer drivin' through texas goddam hill country, pardner...i'm always lookin' ta get in a little target practice if ya ain't hip to the trip"...

...just passin' the word on...

Johnny Sprocket said...

Doesn't every get a boner over their bike?!!

Anonymous said...

Johnny Sprocket, I know I do.

wade said...

Hey "am"

I was only recommending alternatives to restore depleted glucose levels.

sorry though if I was way off topic. it WAS distracting.

thanks for the heads up on gigondas.

salt to taste

ant1 said...

I sure do get a boner from my bike, which is why I got a "one less limp dick" sticker for it.

Commiecanuk said...

ah Tex...the French are passe for insults, we have our own little western Dumfukistan of ex-Texan oil types muttering the mantra of anti-environmentalism, free markets, less guvment control, tax cuts, which was great, except the price of oil went below what it costs to cook them out of those oil sands...boo hoo.

Now solocialism is making a big comeback, as it has in the banking and auto industries.

The world has had about a decade of doing it the Texan way, which is why we're just about as fucked up as Texas.

ant1 said...

canuck - you typed "solocialism". That's an awesome word.

Anonymous said...

http://zippythepinhead.com/Merchant2/merchant.mv?Screen=PROD&Product_Code=14-Nov-08&Category_Code=n2008&Product_Count=13

Anonymous said...

коттедж
восстановление зрения
зеленый лазер
электрошокер

dinoibo said...

Sesli sohbet Sesli chat
Seslisohbet Seslichat
Sesli sohbet siteleri Sesli chat siteleri
Sesli Chat
Sohbet Sesli siteler
Sohbet siteleri Chat siteleri
Sohbet merkezi chat merkezi
Sesli merkezi sesli Sohbet merkezi
Sesli chat merkezi Sohbetmerkezi
Sesli Sohbet Sesli Chat
SesliSohbet Sesli chat siteleri
Sesli sohbet siteleri SesliChat
Sesli Sesli siteler
Seslimuhabbet sesli muhabbet
sesli sohbet sesli chat siteleri
sesli sohbet siteleri sesli chat
seslisohbet seslichat
seslikent sesli kent
sesli sohbet sesli sohbet siteleri
sesli chat sesli chat siteleri
seslisohbet seslichat

Anonymous said...

коттедж
восстановление зрения
зеленый лазер
электрошокер

Anonymous said...

Here what i found -> vision correction

ekle paylas said...

nice blog Thanks for sharing. voicesohbet was really very nice.
sesli chat siteleri sesli sohbet
sesli sohbet siteleri sesli chat
seslichat seslisohbet
sesli siteleri chat siteleri
sohbet siteleri sesli siteler
voice sohbet sesli sohbet siteleri
sesli sohbet seslisohbet
sohbet siteleri sesli chat siteleri
seslichat sesli chat
herkesburda herkes burda
sohbetmerkezi sohbetmerkezi

PROfessionaL said...

Free porn videos xoporntube watch !