Wednesday, January 23, 2008

SUVs and Bike Polo: Together Forever! (At least this week.)

Further to yesterday's post, a commenter mentioned a Toyota ad on the back cover of the current issue of Newsweek which employs seductive images of people enjoying bike polo. I also received email about it. I was curious to see it, and I thought some of you might be interested as well, so I did a little detective work. This mostly involved going to a newsstand and purchasing a copy of Newsweek. For me the revelation wasn't so much the ad as it was that people still pay for news that's printed on paper and doled out on a weekly basis. In any event, though, here it is:


The copy on the bottom explains that the Toyota Sequoia has "enough room for all your gear" and that it allows you to "focus on more important things, like having the time of your life." Apparently, somebody at Toyota's ad agency feels that enough people consider playing bike polo "having the time of your life" to warrant using it in an ad for a $35,000 automobile.

I for one find this whimsical picture of a rider on a dual-suspension, disc brake-equipped mountain bike side-by-side with another on a brakeless fixed-gear together in mallet-swinging harmony to be extremely irritating. Then again, I also find both bike polo and SUVs irritating. I will say, though, that if I had to guess which one of those riders showed up to the game in the Sequoia, I'd definitely go with the guy on the squishy bike with the Casio G-Shock.

84 comments:

johnhat said...

Caught y'all sleeping...
first post
2 posts in one day, it is like christmanza

Clayton said...

seriously. casio g-shocks. why do people wear them?

WheelDancer said...

Third!

Hungary said...

seriously. squishy bikes, why do people ride them?
on a polo field?

Anonymous said...

When i saw this in the mailbox yesterday my first thought was "How long before bsnyc..."

Chunk said...

This ad makes total sense to me. I mean really, who'd be foolish enough to ride their bike to the park?

bikesgonewild said...

...hey, i posted way to early for my abilities...

...it's like i made the break...

GGehrke said...

I'm sorta surprised they didn't make the riders wear helmets. "Professional polocyclists on a closed course."

Also, continuing clues about the Snob's identity: use of the word "copy."

bikesgonewild said...

It's cold, and hurty

john said...

BSNYC is obviously a copy editor at a respectable publication. He's honed his craft writing headlines and captions.

BikeSnobNYC said...

ggehrke,

All it means is I've seen "Crazy People."

Toyota should have gone with "They're boxy but they're good."

--BSNYC

KP said...

Wait a minute! Are we blinded by our cynicism and missing the point here? A fixed gear and a squishy bike rolling along in perfect harmony? Has Toyota unwittingly provided us with that elusive glimpse of Utopia? Is this what Heaven is like? Is this the Phoenix that will rise from the ashes of the impending Fixed Gear Apocalypse? Have we just witnessed the future and it was glorious? Look closely for the "Can't we all just get along" bumper sticker, it must be in there somewhere. On second thought, maybe it is just a ridiculous advertisement.

Gaahl from Gorgoroth said...

I've got one of those Toyotas. It's black.

Columbo said...

Snob sounds like a creative who works for an ad agency somewhere in SoHo west of the Apple Store and the Olsen Twins chamber of death. Weiden & Kennedy would be a good guess. He can bag on the Toyota add because Toyota is not his client...

Bun E said...

Double Boinger polo? Haha!

My bikes go on a Subaru and I have room for all my gear...

bikesgonewild said...

...to the dick posting in my name...

..."it's cold & hurty"...now THAT i mighta said...

mr.complaint said...

Posers and Stchick. Love the sunburst coming out of the MTB riders butt.

Toyota stock is falling like Apples. I'm gonna head over to Soho with some flowers.

bikesgonewild said...

............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Anonymous said...

i've always imagined BSNYC working for the Onion.

greezyed said...

My idea of utopia isn't the two styles of riders together, it's the dream of one of those mallet heads flying off and taking out the windshield of that ridiculous vehicle.

Emily said...

Bike polo may be irritating, but it's nothing compared to the idiotic Silicon Valley-centered "game" of Segway polo. Makes me want to punch Wozniak in the nose.
I'm waiting for enough people to be interested to start a bike lacrosse league. Why am i the only person who thinks that would be fun?

misterarthur said...

doesn't mr. suspension look as though his seat is awfully low?

ruggerknox said...

I drove all the way out to the Sequoia National Forest last year and did not see but two of those wonderful Sequoia’s - damn tall trees obscured my vision...

Andy Pandy said...

It is clear now that fixies and squishy riding trendoids are driving the global warning apocalypse to its inevitable end point by driving gas guzzling oversized boxes to a park to play hokey pokey bike polo. Expect to see a similar curve in the pistadex compared to the NYSE curve. Suggest going to ebay and stock up on essential items ( tubes, tires and other consumables)

BikeSnobNYC said...

Further investigation (or, if you prefer, Googling) shows that at least one of the bike polo players was probably found via Craigslist LA. The ad itself is expired, but a portion of the text remains floating out there in the ether:

"Bike Polo enthusiast needed

We're shooting a still ad for Toyota next Tuesday, the 27th. The ad features a bike polo game being played and we are looking for experienced players to be in the shot...
losangeles.craigslist.org/wst/tlg/486132288.html"

Ah yes, more sleazy liaisons courtesy of Craigslist.

--BSNYC

Anonymous said...

What is the snobs perspective on this latest news concerning rock and roll dickhead racing? All the dopers being pulled towards this team must mean something is haywire with the gravitational time constant

bikesgonewild said...

........................I am a dirty old man........

yonk said...

Yes, I always ride my trail bike with a mallet in hand. Bike polo, what's that?

Anonymous said...

G-shocks are for people who actually work outside don't you know. People who need them actually take them off when they are not working outside.

Scott said...

Why is the idea of a mountain bike playing bike polo any more absurd that a fixie? Basically it's a silly game.

Anonymous said...

well done bike snob.
getting pretty sick of the ad companies taking bike culture and trying to sell other things with it, be it chase atm's or this bs car ad. fuck suv's.

the "alley cat" fashion post was bad enough, now this.

Anonymous said...

Enough space for my stuff? If these shits would drive smaller cars, there'd be more space for my bike on the road. SUV pricks. Need big cars for their fat arses. The models grow bigger every year. Why?

Frank the Tank said...

I love my SUV, it's so nice and big and safe. You idiots with your small cars.

Johnny Sprocket said...

squishy bike riders have to wear g-shocks. normal wtches won't cope with the useless, incessant bouncing.

Anonymous said...

I've had enough!! I love reading bikesnobs blog, I check it religiously and find it immensly entertaining. Bike Polo is so much fun, and as a creative advertising student and designer I was very dissappointed to see it exploited in a major automobile ad. Further, I hate to see BSNYC incessantly bash my favorite team sport to play. I've never played international rules polo but 'round here "urban rules" bike polo is awesomely intense, and on a good day leaves me feeling as beat up and tired as a day of cross racing or mountain biking would. Say it aint so bikesnob! come out and play for a day, you'll be hooked. Unless your a whiny baby man who falls too much and cant deal with competative team sports.
-Sean from RVA

Anonymous said...

Anon. 5:55,

You hit the nail on the head! He's got to be one of those smarmy Onion-ites. Stalk their offices.

Steve said...

somehow i see bsnyc more as a new yorker type - possibly feeding anthony lane his better lines, filling in for joan accocella, maybe dashing off a caption for a hung-over cartoonist, patches on the elbows of his tweed sweatshirt, a silly hat, "elements of style" practically memorized.

or maybe starbucks.

Polygraf said...

Bike polo offends my senses, take an exclusively rich mans sport and make it accessible for everyone minus the horses, only a few crisp lyrics from cogxxxtreme could clarify my muddled mind.

Anonymous said...

I think this would have worked equally effectively...

http://www.point83.com/calendar/

Anonymous said...

If they use those mallets to hit each other in the nuts, i might even pay to see it.

Anonymous said...

Another twofer! Adding to the important clues, we now know that snob does not subscribe to Newsweek magazine. Each day, we come closer to unmasking him.

Hidehiko Yoshida said...

Hmm.. bicycle polo was actually invented in 1891.

Anonymous said...

Bike polo was not invented in 1891 that posting in wikipedia proves nothing...riding around on a spoked wheel bicycle swinging a mallet rates high on the list of stupid things people do

suvKiller said...

I think you guys are missing the real crime here:
Toyota is telling you to buy an SUV so you can ride your bike. Those onelesscar guys would be furious;

fhfr436 said...

My dad gave me a Casio G-Shock for Christmas and I love it. It's a bit big, but has two features I've never seen before: solar cells to supply all power and automatic national atomic clock syncronization. Plus, all buttons are recessed for protection. Don't knock it 'til you try it.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Sean from RVA,

I begrudge no man his bike polo, but I personally eschew any game involving sticks, rackets, mallets, balls, or pucks--even if a bike is involved. Feels too much like gym class.

--BSNYC

Anonymous said...

Fuck Toyota. Fuck left handed bike polo players. Fuck people that drive gas guzzlers to play polo on a bitch bike, aka a full suspension bike.

Fuck people that make fun of real bicycle polo. You clowns are afraid to play with sticks because you've been beaten with the ugly stick all of your miserable lives.

Have a nice day...

ZiP said...

Blogger Scott Gordo said...

Yeah, but you're likely not getting the joke that they may not have realized they made.

All those collabos had late 80's/early 90's freestyle stickers referencing bikes that slammed the door on the era of the really cool BMX bikes and style. By the late 80's companies like GT, Hutch, Schwinn, etc were no longer built in Santa Ana or Chicago or Florida, but outsourced to Taiwan. With some exceptions, the only thing remaining of the product that made them famous in the first place was the name on the sticker. Predictably, as the quality went down the tubes and interest in BMX moved on to MTB, BMX's relatively reserved chrome and candy colors were replaced with neon.

Does this story sound familiar to anyone? I think Trackstar is actually fairly prescient in predicting their own demise.

Oh yeah: BikeSnob, enjoyed the Z-Rims mention a while back.

--

True, while I had heard about that series being "BMX inspired" and such, I didn't know that history you're talking about (the death of BMX, shift to MTB action, etc)... while everything will always be cyclical (no pun intended), are we burning through the cycles faster than in the past?

Also, what is the new fixed gear? (if fixed gear is the new skateboard).

Skateboy said...

"lighten up Francis"

i have an SUV, a Nissan X-Terra.
I also don't use it to get to
work, I commute on bike or skates
18.5 miles round trip.
Just because you have an SUV
doesn't mean your an ass,
morons.
The driver may be a wife/husband,
gf/bf father/mother of a biker, or
in my case a biker too.

Commiecanuk said...

Skateboy, having an SUV doesn't mean you're an ass, but it still means your an asshole. They are a danger to everyone on the road, a basic poor design, they avoid safety regs because they are "trucks", they are poorly built and way overpriced. But show a rugged-looking guy jumping dirt hills on Tee Vee and twats rush out to buy them.

SUVs are for lame-os who don't realize they really should be in Ford Windstars: the official vehicle of giving up on life.

The final irony is that these vehicles almost universally have a chipped "BUSH 04" sticker, a 9/11 memorial sticker, and a "support the troops" ribbon, while they pump billions into the Saudi Kingdom.

Toyota ad execs really hit the nail on the head with this campaign, a year from now all those soccer field will be converted to polo fields where obese housewives on fixies with cupholders and DVDs will define the new American pastime.

$5 million well spent Toyota, Madison Ave. gets it right again.

Anonymous said...

Fhfr436: A G-Shock is an effective method of birth control.

BunE said...

Anon 10:29 Jan 24.


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ruggerknox said...

"The final irony is that these vehicles almost universally have a chipped "BUSH 04" sticker, a 9/11 memorial sticker, and a "support the troops" ribbon, while they pump billions into the Saudi Kingdom."

Well put...

Even sadder is the "support the troops" sticker actually means "support the Bush." Or even wore it means "I support the troops be used in whatsoever manner numba one cowboy see's fit to use them for his or his own parties gain." The "W" sticker is almost exclusively germane to a large SUV.

Anonymous said...

Ford Windstars: the official vehicle of giving up on life

Brilliant!

Pappy said...

I for one would relish the opportunity to play bike polo on a golf course/lawn bowling lawn, in the warmth of a setting summer sun.

After finishing our Long Island Iced Teas, we could then proceed with a mobile SUV (smash up vehicles) assault + mallots.

Cheerio.

Bobby said...

Wait...I think I have an idea for Quicksilver II...

The Greasers vs the Socs in bike polo.

"Stay golden Ponyboy!"

deaner said...

Looks like I found yet another use for my Superlight. In addition to being the perfect bike for technical trails, apparently it's also great for polo. I'm glad I've got disc brakes and 100mm of rear travel to soak up all those bumps in that gnarly grass field.

leroy said...

Right on, Anon 9:26 AM!

I know just what you mean.

Muffy, Kip and I used to enjoy a spirited match of water polo at the Club.

But the "man" said other Club members were complaining about pony droppings in the pool.

Haters just ruin everything.

johnhat said...

wow, I got first post again? does it really matter? wait, does my life really matter if I can't post first, second, or third on this blog? I guess not

Matt in Seattle said...

Anon 2:58

Bike polo is high on the list of stupid things people do?

You must be shrooming....

Anonymous said...

Anyone else read that excellent Malcolm Gladwell article on SUVs in the New Yorker a while back?

First, SUVs make you feel protected, but aren't nearly as safe as, say, the aforementioned Windstar. Also if you're in an SUV and get into an accident, the likelihood you'll kill the other driver is greater than if you were driving a regular sized car. (So now you have to get an SUV just to defend against being crushed by everybody else's SUV!)

Here's the article link, split in two.

www.gladwell.com/2004/
2004_01_12_a_suv.html

-Russ

Anonymous said...

Another "bike in ads" can be seen in the TV ad for e-trade? The guy braggs about how many screens he needs to track his stocks. Looks like he's trying to live aboard the good ship Eberkenezer from The Matrix. Anyway, look in the background of his cramped space for the fixed gear bike. It was missing mallet mount though.

Errit Flowers said...

I'm starting a blog called WalkSnobNYC its about walking related no no's and different walking styles check it out www.bikesarejustbikesyouarentcool.com

Anonymous said...

commiecanuck said ...

"...on fixies with cupholders and DVDs..."

Do you know where I can locate a good cupholder for my squishy bike ? I've been looking but can't seem to find one (seriously).
I agree about FUV's ... better to get an early 80's American 4-dr sedan with steel bumpers and 4500 lbs of steel backup...they're much safer, handle better, hold just as much and with the correct shocks are also decent offroad ... plus...people just get out of your way.

MONTY said...

speaking of bikes in ads - anyone seen the tandem track bike used in the print ads of eetimes? i get an icky feeling every time I see it.

BTW anon 8:49 PM- getting pretty sick of the bikers taking over nerd culture. we had the internet first - go back to communicating with your middle finger.

Anonymous said...

Right you are, Monty. Like anybody 'owns' bike culture, or fixie fashion, or messenger style or whatever. Once you project something into the public consciousness, it ain't just yours anymore. It's silly to base your identity so much on surface level cultural stuff that you get all bent out of shape when somebody else lifts it.

nicole_ said...

Thanks a lot - I literally choked half to death on my cereal when I saw this (which is totally unfair because I do not endorse anything about the ad).

Unless you're on a mountain, get off the damn mountain bikes. I promise, your taint can handle a street without shocks.

Retards.

Anonymous said...

As a passionate Bike Polo Player for 4+ years I am thrilled to see this ad! The great game of Bike Polo needs this exposure.

They are obviously not using the single speed that I prefer but I am stoked to see the sport being highlighted.

Peace & Bike Polo Power~

Icon O. Classt said...

Haven't read through all these comments, but WTF does the intro caption (sorry, wrong argot, I'm sure) have to do with the scene? "The perfect day isn't always up to the weather"...and the accompanying picture depicts what is arguably a perfect day, at least in terms of weather. Seems like two polo yuppies playing in the rain/snow would make more sense.

treechunk said...

So as a cyclist, I find all of you hateful, small minded people appalling. Who gives a fuck what kind of bike SOMEONE ELSE is riding? I play polo, and I happen to use a bike with front suspension that is also a fixed gear. I find it helps me play better. As to watch choice, again, WHO CARES?!?!?! Go ride your bike with the watch of your self righteous choice.

And for those of you who find polo "irritating", try it. You can play virtually anywhere, equipment cost is low, and you'll have more fun than just about any other type of cycling you'll try. It's a lot of fucking fun.

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