Friday, November 2, 2007

Worst of NYC Craigslist: More Sickly-Sweet, Gooey Bike Love

Okay, if you're anything like me, after all this heavy talk about marketing you need a little palate cleanser before the weekend. And believe it or not, I was visiting Craigslist's "Missed Connections" sections for a voyeur's view of how cyclists court each-other (or fail to court each-other) even before Bike Snob Chicago. Depending on your own disposition, you can either view these would-be encounters as tragicomically unsewn kernels of love, or as incredibly fortunate moments in which two more idiots fail to meet, couple and procreate. Here are some of the latest examples so you can read and decide for yourself:

girl on bike: purple rims, white moccasins - m4w (Greenwich Village)
Reply to: [deleted]
Date: 2007-11-01, 11:25PM EDT
i saw you ride by near 13th st. & 5th ave this afternoon. we pretty much need to be friends or something.

She also pretty much needs to stop riding a fixed-gear in leather socks. Then again, anyone so resolute in her own impracticality would probably not be attracted to your coy wishy-washiness. Next time do a rain dance and when she takes cover from the storm place a Navajo blanket over her shoulders and present her with a beaded and fringed u-lock holster. And try to keep your powder dry, Dances With Wolves.

cute boy on bike // bird on arm? - w4m
Reply to: [deleted]
Date: 2007-10-31, 3:42PM EDT

i smiled at you
you were in motions
i couldn't do this in person
soooooooooooo...
find me?
i was wearing a _______ hat...

If that was an actual bird on his arm and not a tattoo, and if the word that fits in that blank space is "pirate," then I've only got two words: it's on!

Biking Downtown on West Side Highway While I was Running Uptown - m4w (Midtown West)
Reply to: [deleted]
Date: 2007-10-28, 9:31PM EDT

You were biking downtown on the West Side Highway while I was running uptown. I had a rucksack on, training for adventure race. You had a cute smile on. Our eyes locked as long as we were in visual of each other until you whisked away in your bike. Let me know if you see this. Maybe tea or coffee?

"Mick, was that you?!?"

30 comments:

Anonymous said...

third!

Prolly said...

Wow. 2 hours later and just 1 comment?

Snuffy said...

yaaaarrrrgh matey!

Anonymous said...

the eternal fourth

Anonymous said...

maybe yesterday's post scared everybody off.

Anonymous said...

Man who had sex with bike in court.

BSNYC, man, you're not invested in the cause, enough. THIS dude, yikes...talk about dedication.

Anonymous said...

BSNYC --

You missed one:

Girl on my lap last mon. nite: m4w (Rose bar, gramercy park).

i thought u looked familiar. u used to be on full house, right?
i watch your reruns w/ my 8 yr old.

i'm 36 yrs young and have all my own urine.

if u r ready for relationship w/ guy almost twice your age, but less than half your net worth, call me.

if not, tell your sister i'm free.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,306796,00.html

Anonymous said...

does that wheelsucker Prolly reallly need to comment on every fucking god damn post?

nubloom said...

how do you know that the first bike was fixed.. brainiac

BikeSnobNYC said...

Pixelprogression,

I'm making a gross, self-serving assumption based on rim color.

--BSNYC

sh said...

actually, i think the white moccasins gave it away.

(thanks for the post, we've been missing the bike love lately)

Anonymous said...

Very late on topic Mission, but They should take notes.


http://www.alienbikes.com/

I've got my money on Alien in the battle of the new blank framed bike companys.

Anonymous said...

Alien vs. Mission

The differences are black and white, literally!

BikeSnobNYC said...

N8,

Thanks for the link. I enjoyed this quote:

"Aesthetics play a big part in fixed gear cycling, and if you like us think [...] holes (water bottle, brakes, fenders!?!) ruin a frame, you've come to the right place."

Holes don't ruin frames, people do.

--BSNYC

Anonymous said...

two posts in one day!? bikesnob, you never cease to amaze me.

Anonymous said...

Alien vs. Mission

The differences are White, black, and DAYGLO GREEN!

At least alien has relieved us of the plague of flip flop hubs.

Now I don't have to worry about that other side of the flange taunting me with my own ignorance in how to put it to good use.

Good riddance. (Side note: I actually hear their wheel sets are very nice....just saying)

Anonymous said...

I bet it wasn't a fixed gear and just a purple rimmed singlespeed. Are there that many people riding fixed without clips or clipless pedals? Uhhh...maybe? I don't know.

Anonymous said...

Anon 6:42..

If you use FGG as your research base, about 1 in 15 to 1 in 20 ride clipless.

The new thing is to slap the old BMX pedals, top tube pads, and cheap plastic chain tensioners on them.

Bike Snob was right, it's heading toward an 80's BMX revival. I'm terrified.

Soon Redline will start making good parts again, but for fixies.

<8-I

-Kicks.

LK said...

Mick? I think that was me.

I can't help myself.

Matt said...

leroy - freaking hilarious! My wife sent me that link and told me that the world may be coming to an end.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Feel free to mock me, but that Mission bike business put me in a foul mood today. I suspect (or hope) that the whole venture tanks like the Howard Dean campaign those clowns worked on previously. Apparently they will jump on any bandwagon. The trend (in general) towards capitalist progessives is disheartening. (I think we are on the road to serfdom in ways Jim has never imagined.) In the future, perhaps you can have an "intern" conduct interviews. I would prefer if you were freed up to provide criticism. That many felt the need to defend Mission bikes suggests these are bad times. I am almost tempted to start something akin to a bicycle version of the Baffler.

Anonymous said...

anon 4:07:

the trend towards capitalist progressives? uhh...

are you sure you're not in europe?

Anonymous said...

http://vancouver.craigslist.org/bik/467557903.html

Anonymous said...

Lance Armstrong commercial:

Did you see the one with Lance teaching some little blonde girl how to ride? They never show her face, and the bike looks like it has 14-inch wheels. Could it be Ashley?

Anonymous said...

Boy, you people in America are really sex-crazed, when I ride my kine nothing except Dolly Parton would get me of my bike, and nothing would het me off Dolly Parton. I love the "Our eyes locked as long as we were in visual of each other until you whisked away in your bike". This stinks of acne, being whisked away IN a bike, sounds like Cinderella. And the guys suggest tea or coffeee ? I'm going to bed to have some tea and coffee with my wife.

clintpatty said...

yay for Helium

Anonymous said...

'trend towards capitalist progressives'

I've translated that into esperanto:

tendenco al kapitalismaj progresemuloj

Hope that helps.

- Prof. Frink

db said...

Thank god someone remembers esperanto.
(Danki al Dio iu memor Esperanto.)

Tamara said...

Wow. 2 hours later and just 1 comment?