Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Bully For Us! Ruining America One Bike Lane at a Time

First of all, remember this?



Well, I've received a press release form the inventor informing me that they've finished the first production model--or, more specifically, they've finished making a picture of the first production model with a computer:

July 10, 2014, Fair Oaks, CA. Flying Rider announced today that the Computer Aided Design of its first production model is complete. (Rendering shown below.) Two potential fabricators have bid to produce the frame and others are expected. David Schwartz, designer of the novel vehicle said, “The first proposal we received was for a carbon fiber reinforced plastic frame. The second was for T6061 aluminum tubing construction. The all steel proof-of-concept bike, which weighs 28 pounds is too heavy to be acceptable. We’re aiming for a 17 pound machine tough enough to commute on.” 

I'm pretty confident that this is the first bicycle in the world to employ both Computer Aided Design and "suicide" brake levers:


Also, he says the reaction to the concept has been "mostly positive:"

Public reaction to the no-seat concept has been mostly positive. Many have expressed eagerness to try it out for themselves. However, some see no need to tinker with the basic diamond frame design – now 130 years old and well-proven. “No doubt, this new design isn’t for everyone,” noted Schwartz, “but lots of people have told me they look forward to the extra efficiency and are anticipating the thrill of a hang glider-like ‘flying’ experience.”

The problem isn't that he's tinkering with the "basic diamond frame design."  The problem is that it's already been tinkered with, and that an alternative to it already exists in the form of a recumbent--and if you want a hang glider-like "flying" experience you can always get one of these:


Secondly, by way of executing a thematic "fast half turn" like our ami up there on the H-Zontal, a Washington Post columnist says cyclists are bullies:


I have to hand it to the bicyclists in the D.C. area. They’ve got more nerve than an L.A. biker gang. And some can be just as nasty.

They fight to have bike lanes routed throughout the city, some in front of churches where elderly parishioners used to park their cars. They slow-pedal those three-wheel rickshaws through downtown during rush hour, laughing at motorists who want them to get out of the way.

So cyclists can't ride past churches now?  Are you kidding me?  Presumably though it's still okay for the churchgoers to double-park and block traffic all day Sunday while they play make-believe, because if "God" wanted people to walk to church He wouldn't have created SUVs.

Not only that, but the cyclists also want...an escalator!

Now, some of them are pushing to have a “bicycle escalator” installed on 15th Street NW, going uphill from V Street to what used to be known as Malcolm X Park (until influential newcomers to the city pressed to get it changed back to Meridian Hill).

Moving stairs are the devil's work, everybody knows that.

And worst of all, these cyclists have the audacity to stop at red lights!

Bikers routinely worm their way to the front of a line of cars waiting at a red light. When the light turns green, they’ll poke along at a snail’s pace, holding up traffic while motorists wait for a chance to pass. Then they do the same thing at the next stop light.

This is a cunning twist, because most anti-cycling editorials hinge on cyclists not stopping at red lights.

But all of this is just a flimsy pretext for what's really bothering him, which is gentrification:

I recall in the not-so-distant past when the city’s bikers weren’t newly arrived, mostly white millennials but black juveniles whom D.C. police frequently stopped — at least in neighborhoods that were being gentrified. Stopped for riding on sidewalks. Stopped for riding in parking lots.

Now that kids like them are being moved to the outskirts of the city, if not out altogether, the District government is bending over backward to make Washington a more “biker-friendly” city.

It's too bad he was either unwilling or unable to write an insightful article on the subject and instead buried underneath all this "bully" nonsense, because the matter is a complex one, fraught with matters of race, economics, politics, and so forth, as anybody who lives in New York City, or Washington, D.C., or any large city knows:


("We have come for your real estate."--The Whiteys)

This could have been the jumping-off point for something legitimately interesting--after all, it's tough not to notice that by the time the bike lanes come into a neighborhood you can't afford to live there anymore--but instead he devotes precisely 42 words to the subject:

So far, more than 72 miles of bike lanes have been carved out of city streets. There are virtually none in Ward 8, by the way, which has the lowest income and highest number of children of any ward in the city.

This is a very important point, and one well worth exploring, but he does absolutely nothing with it.  Also, what is he saying exactly?  Does he want bike lanes in the low-income neighborhoods as well, or does he not want any bike lanes anywhere?  I have no idea, because he then concludes with some bullshit about the Muppets:

On Wednesday, the Washington Area Bicyclist Association’s Bike Ambassadors will ride to the NoMa Summer Screen viewing of “The Muppets” “to hand out surprise goodies to people who biked.” There’ll be kids and bikes and Muppets, as if Kermit is supposed to make us forget about the biker terrorists out to rule the road.

The WABA Web site features a photograph of a cyclist holding a sign that reads:

“Dear D.C. drivers, thank you for sharing! Love, Cyclists.”

If only they meant it.

Terrorists?  Kermit the Frog?!?  This article is a total brain shart--a small amount of actual matter, but mostly just a bunch of wind and noise.

By the way, if you're a cyclist it probably surprises you to learn you're a bully, given all the epithets and excessive airline baggage fees and "coal-rollings" to which we're regularly subjected, but here's one cyclist who was harassed by a pickup truck driver and fought back by filming his assailant:


Larsen told KCAL9’s Stacey Butler that traffic was bad and every time they passed the truck, the driver blew exhaust at him.

“We just kind of passed it off as the guy is frustrated with traffic and he’s taking it out on us,” Larsen said.

Miles down the road in Dana Point, Larsen said the driver did it for the fourth time.

“I pulled my phone from my back pocket and I turned it to video,” he said.

Minutes later, Larsen said the truck pulled up next to him and a female passenger threw bottles of water and Gatorade at him and shouted profanities.

Wouldn't it be ironic if, after all that, they somehow figured out a way to charge the cyclist?

Well, don't worry, because it looks like they have:

Orange County sheriff's investigators have reviewed Bryan Larsen's video (warning: cyclist utters a profanity) and recommended charges be filed against him and the truck passenger, the department's spokesman Lt. Jeff Hallock said.

The passenger may face assault and battery charges, while Larsen could be looking at being charged with "words in public likely to illicit a violent reaction," Hallock said.

Wow.  They might as well just change the charge to "operating a vehicle likely to illicit a violent reaction, e.g. a bicycle."  After all, this is America, where the victim is always wrong--especially when that victim's on a bike.

Yeah, we're such bullies:


Me: Blue Bike, You: Black Car Hitting Me On My Blue Bike - w4m - 25 (Bedstuy - Bedford Ave)
age : 25

You sideswiped me while turning into the bike lane, after coasting in an out of it at about ten mph for two blocks with no blinker on. As I tried to get around you, you turned suddenly into the lane and hit me. And then proceeded to yell at me and push me around. 

"You hit my car with your bike," you shouted. 

Really?

Granted, I was yelling some pretty rude stuff at you but you know what, YOU HIT MY BODY WITH YOUR CAR. I would have called the cops but I didn't feel safe sticking around a moment longer and f*ck the police and I was late for work so I called you something rude and rode away. Not my classiest move but then, I'd just been hit by a car. 

So I just wanted to say,
GET OUT OF THE BIKE LANE, YOU DILLWEED. 

We are riding there. Minding our own business. Avoiding pot holes and opening car doors. We do not have thousands of pounds of steel protecting us. We are trapped between traffic and parked cars with nowhere to go. You could have killed me. We were both lucky that you didn't. 

Think about it.

She'd better be careful, she's liable to go to jail for using the word "dillweed."

133 comments:

Anonymous said...

podio?

cycle

Anonymous said...

Boo-urns

Fredrik Jönsson said...

Yes.

Anonymous said...

TOP SOMETHING

Anonymous said...

I'm attaching a set of fire extinguishers to the sides of my bike so I can "coal roll" pedestrians on multi use trails. I'm also starting a kickstarter to help fund a digital bike horn that whistles dixie so I can have the ultimate machine of intimidation.

Anonymous said...

Top 5!! Need more EPO

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Staying safe in the front group.

Anonymous said...

Top ten!

dickey said...

Dammit. Must've taken a spill on the cobbles.

RoadQueen said...

Top ten!

Anonymous said...

Courtland Milloy is a racist idiot. It's amazing ANYONE takes him seriously.

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

DILL WEED

Anonymous said...

Dear Flying Rider,

The effectiveness of your rear derailleur would be improved by the addition of shifters somewhere on the bike. Also, with a single front ring and a 11-15 five-speed freewheel, you might want to consider a shorter derailleur hanger. The 8-incher stolen from a 1985 Muddy Fox may be considered "overkill".

RoadQueen said...

Are there ANY 'nice' stories around about bicycles and how they're awesome and how in some little town, the cars and bikes and pedestrians get along just fine and nobody gets run over, etc.?

Because these stories about victim blaming and such really make me want to do something reckless and possibly jail sentence inducing.

This stuff is why I do not live in a big city, I do not visit big cities any more than I have to, and I'd love to be a borderline hermit out in the middle of nowhere. Good grief.

A person is smart - people are stupid. The greater the number of people within close proximity to each other, the lower the collective I.Q. dips. Depressing.

BIKE HATE

Buffalo Bill said...

DILL WEED

JB said...

Nonplussed bib shorts guy in the house.

P. Bateman said...

dang early birds - always gettin' all the good worm, podium spots and pussy. dang.

JB said...

80s gal: Hey, you got your chocolate in my peanut butter!

80s dude: Hey, you got your peanut butter in my chocolate!

[both make-out furiously]

fin

by 80s Steven Spielberg

P. Bateman said...

good grief.

@anoynymouse is right - that is some thinly veiled reverse racist nonsense out of millroy.

though in his defense a lot of hipster white folks are pretty annoying. #killwhitey

@roadqueen is also right. i think i'll just stick to smaller places with less crazy (ok, its a different sort of crazy, but at least its on a smaller, more manageable scale).
#mayberryrules

babble on said...

What?! I am a bike terrorist?! Geez. And I TRY to get along with motorists, at least till they get all dumb-ass in my face. But it seems they just can't help themselves...

Anonymous said...

Good spot on the WaPo screed. I just read it this am and am fuming. What really stood out for me, though, was not the usual mix of logical fallacies and rhetorical flimflammery when it comes to urban cycling. That's par for the course with hacks like him. Rather, I was truly taken aback by Milloy's outright suggestion that violence be done to cyclists engaging in what to what he considers offensive behavior.

RoadQueen said...

Another thought for today - still perplexed about the hang gliding bike. How is hanging by a harness that's strangling your junk more comfortable than a bike seat?

I think I'd rather split myself on a wedgie seat than hang by one of those harnesses. YMMV, of course.

babble on said...

I was just wondering about that, myself. And wouldn't your hands go numb, too, what with hanging off that frame n'all?

Anonymous said...

Have you guys ever noticed thanks to social bias how the in-group does things this way and the out-group does things a slightly different way? Am I right ladies?

Throw in a few butts and boner references and that article is hack comedy gold!

mikeweb said...

My estate attorney said,

WILL DEED

Anonymous said...

How have I missed that bicycle is the prototype for Mr. Garrison's Flexi Grip?

http://alpha666.de/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/07/garrison_it.jpg

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/153051/flexi-grips

Greenbelt said...

The Washington Post prints wrong or just vile opinion pieces all the time.

The Washington Post is owned by Amazon.

Since the Post is already in a free fall, canceling your subscription doesn't do much good.

Best way to protest the Post's editorial and op-ed idiocy is to boycott Amazon.

Camera Dude said...

keep those cameras rolling cyclists it is your only hope for justice if you manage to survie your ride in the
"bike lane"

babble on said...

Izzit true? Froome is out?

Anonymous said...

Wow. Chris Froome just abandoned the race after three falls today.

Greenbelt said...

Re Courtland Milloy, resident of Ft. Washington MD (outside the beltway carlocked community).

Here's WABA's response: http://www.waba.org/blog/2014/07/setting-the-record-straight-re-milloys-bullies/

And the key item:

At one time, Milloy seemed to recognize the need for this dedicated space for bicyclists, as his own 1998 account of biking after his license was suspended for excessive speeding included being caught in the common bicyclist’s catch-22 in which you are welcome on neither the roadway nor the sidewalk, and there is no third option.

Bryan said...

Man, I missed podium cause I was actually on a bike machine.
Love the extra links and all in the comments, but let us get some hyperlinks!
It's easy. text you want linked

Anon @ 0743 - YES!

babble on said...

Huh. And here I figured I crashed a lot... three crashes in two days beats my record.

Bryan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BamaPhred said...

Let the Two Minutes of Hate begin.

Victims are protagonists

The innocent are guilty

You are here to serve the State.

AYHSMB

Present company excluded, as if I had to even say that.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, Cleveland:
Congrats on getting the 2016 RNC. I have a spare bedroom if you want to avoid republicans for a week.

Anonymous said...

Do I read that right? Dipshit longs for the good old days when cyclists were black and got harassed?

babble on said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
wishiwasmerckx said...

For a dead astrophysicist, that Carl Sagan is riding a heck of a TdF. Oh, wait, what? Never mind...

le Correcteur said...

Man, WCRM, you need to start sleeping in a little bit more. Or have a longer and more leisurely breakfast! Here on the left coast it's not even 9am and there are 40 comments!

dancesonpedals said...

biking in america is officially like driving in russia, where drivers feel the need to routinely record their side of the story.

russian dash cams

please give it 20 seconds

Dooth said...

Put that Fly Bike on a trainer and it's a sex apparatus.

Flyover BC said...

Curses, Kermit's cover is blown and our plan is known.

We'll need to withdraw Kermit. Perhaps we can deploy Grover, or better yet, Elmo to calm the outcry against our plot to rule the road.

Muwhaahaaha!

le Correcteur said...

elicit does not equal illicit, Snob.

Just sayin.

And by the way, the same pattern of gentrification is (has already?) taken place in Venice, CA as well. We've come for your real estate indeed! And we demand bike lanes!

le Correcteur.

David G said...

Me: me, You: who wrote that Craigslist post - m4w

ken e. said...

the old-timey gal is cute and non-plussed! but it may be a hard time getting her in bib shorts that only show her ankles...

il Pirata est Mort said...

Read the following the other day: Conflict is inevitable but combat is optional.

Hope I can rein in my rage on the bike accordingly.

Anonymous said...

Big afternoon and evening.
Soccer and TdF. Lots of recliner time tonight.

babble on said...

-and yet-
The wealthier the neighbourhood the harder they fight the installation of bike lanes.

Qu'est ce le Fuck?

dancesonpedals said...

I saw the old-timey gals and thought, "get ready for a cunning array of stunts"

Anonymous said...

"GET OUT OF THE BIKE LANE, YOU DILLWEED" ?? That's so ambiguous (at least the insult part), that I may start using it. Should look up Dillweed in the urban dictionary first...

Comment deleted said...

Bicycle face? That's way down on my worry list, which is topped by Bicycle scranus, followed by getting coal-rolled/cornholed by some monster-truck-driving hillbilly.

heinz said...

dillweed never hurt anybody. why the hate?

Chris Froome said...

Ouch.

JLRB said...

Fuck Millroy - I am cancelling my Post subscription (that'll learn 'em!) unless he agrees to die a slow painful death

At least this guy at the Post is providing a little perspective

BamaPhred said...

I saw a bike share/regional bike route plan for my local area. Just having it on paper brings me to the brink of despair

Not because it will never be built, but because it is an indicator of Peak Bike Infrastructure.

Anonymous said...

"This is a cunning twist..."

no; pm me for the real explanation

Anonymous said...

"heinz said...
dillweed never hurt anybody. why the hate?"

it's a gateway emotion

JLRB said...

Milloy will probably get a bonus from Amazon because his venom got a bunch of clicks..modern journalism

Anonymous said...

Day before yesterdee, I was going south on 2nd Ave approaching 35th Street. The corner of which is obscured by a big wall where construction is going on. A Citibike guy zoomed past me(relatively speaking as I was stopped for the red traffic light).
He approached the corner with almost gleeful wreckless abandon and perfectly crashed into a delivery guy (who had the green light right of way). Delivery guy definitely did not see it coming as the wall obstructed view til the very last second, as well for the Citibiker. It was such a perfect head tube to head tube crash. They both instantly went from 15 mph to zero. Both hit the ground at the same time. They both got up and started arguing so I guess they were OK. Should have been filmed in grainy speeded up black and white like in the 1920s, tinny piano music optional.
No cars were scratched in the taking place of this incident.

I had to change a flat yesterday evening on Christie and Stanton. It was lovely.

I try not to shoal cars. I wanna live!

vsk

Anonymous said...

Dillweed is so funny... humorously critiquing the corporate environment and so forth. Sometimes you don't know whether to laugh or cry. I loved his inept boss with the hair that looked like devil horns. Wait, what? Oh. Nevermind.

Anonymous said...

Road Queen, with all due respect, and yourself excluded, I would bet that the average IQ of NYC resident is about 50 points higher than that of that of the resident of some podunk backwater town (e.g. Keith Maddox). Also, San Diego is not a big city.

Anonymous said...

I hate most people.

whowantwhat said...

@le Correcteur - Check the LA Times article. They don't know the difference between elicit and illicit either.

crosspalms said...

Isn't elicit the online version of illicit, i.e. porn?

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah and I'm not "worming" my way to the front of a line of cars; you're just "cowing" your way to a standstill, Butty!

BamaPhred said...

Dear Anon @ 1:52

It's not that the average intelligence of flyover country inhabitants is lower than NYC, it's that the 1% jerkoids, like the rolling coal and runiminadeetch crowd, lower the average for the rest of us. Like the Snob says, it must hurt to be that stupid.

BamaPhred said...

According to the Twitterer the Snob must be setting up a rolling bike repair shop off wherever he could be. Pumping tires, adjusting seats, now if only he had a way to peddle coffee hats, and books..... The next product could be Dr WCRM/RTMS Scranus Zorching Cream.

Dooth said...

Dill weed! Aawww, she must be sweet. Curious about the other invective she hurled at that cretin... Huckleberry?

Anonymous said...

ROLL COAL

JB said...

What the native-NYC-inhabitant equivalent of flyover-rolling-coal-guy?

JB said...

"What is the"

Velocodger said...

Road Queen @8:23 Truer words were never gespoken. Rural people can be pretty stupid too, but, since there's less of them, it's not as evident.

Anonymous said...

I've been following Snob around the city too, Bama. What a good snobaritan he's been. Pumping tires, tightening seat posts, helping little old ladies out of hemis parked in bike lanes.....I think we'll be hearing about it tomorrow. Probably at 6:30 am.

JLRB said...

Are people demanding that he pump tires for them, again? Humiliation is a valuable resource - could be new drawings for Ken

Flyover BC said...

In the southwestern part of flyover country we have a different pronunciation of dillweed.

Here we pronounce it dick-wad or dick-weed. Sometimes we contract it to just dick, sort of like you-all is pronounced ya'll.

BamaPhred said...

And anyway, what's wrong with filtering up to the stoplight in a line of cars?

babble on said...

Now I know y'all are switched on n'everything, but in case you hadn't noticed, a dick is a GOOD thing! I love dicks. They're beautiful. Just like cunts. Mine is my favourite thing, and it is especially happy when it gets together with Dick.


It's one of the best ways to find Heaven on Earth, that... hadn't you noticed?!?

If you want to insult someone, stick with dillweed.

McFly said...

Damn I was only in DC 3 days.

Babble you should retrofit a regulation seat to that Fly bike and have a pretty sweet roll cage for your numerous spills. Make it removable so you can still strap in and get hammocked*.

(*hammocking is the sexual practice of getting in a sling like apparatus and receiving the bone via reciprocal thrusts.)

Anonymous said...

bikes- they're not just for polo anymore.

http://www.nhregister.com/general-news/20140609/bicyclist-shoots-another-in-new-haven

RoadQueen said...

The stereotype that follows rural folk is just as accurate as every other stereotype out there.....they're usually not true.

Lifestyle does not always determine the I.Q. level of a person, and no, most rural folk are not stupid nor have any lower I.Q. than those who dwell in an apartment.

They do have a different outlook on life, and they know different things than their city brethren. Not better things, not worst things, but different things.

It is only my personal theory that people living and working in close proximity causes emotional distress to those immersed in said cloister, which can and does cause emotional outbursts, overreaction, and desensitizes the sense of empathy towards others. How can it not? That's a lot of damn people to empathize with and be considerate of 24/7.

I should have chosen better wording, as I suppose what I was trying to convey is not that stupidity is as much of the problem (although, the percentage being the same as in rural areas, is bound to indicate that there are more individuals in the city due to the higher overall population per square mile), but a numbing of the emotion which causes considerate, pleasant, polite behavior.

I don't know if that makes anything clearer or not. Meh.

Everybody get together, try to love one another right now.

KUMB AYAH

Anonymous said...

In the first line: "peddle-by shooting." Translation: this is two dum fore yew to reed.

While I'm at it can I register my protest at everybody thinking the word jewelry is pronounced JEW-luh-ree? No, it's fucking JULE-ree also known as JEWEL-ree or if you prefer, IT'S RIGHT THERE IN THE FUCKING WORD, JEWEL, RY. You fuckin usherin in the dark age motherfuckers!

leroy said...

AN OPEN LETTER TO COURTLAND MILLOY

Dear Mr. Milloy --

My dog suggests you purchase a BSNYC cap in the moisture wicking fabricway. It's guaranteed to dissipate peculiar thoughts.

If your thoughts are more than merely peculiar, you can line the cap with foil to prevent you from exposing your embarrassing bits in polite society.

JLRB said...

McFly - I do see the coincidence - you spend three days here and the papers are full of bike hate - need that police woman to write a letter to the editoriot

RoadQueen said...

Leroy @ 4:07 for COD

Anonymous said...

COD to Leroy @ 4:07.

BamaPhred said...

Well RF while you're already in a rage the common pronunciation of jewelry here is jew-ray.

Anonymous said...

I can't utter motherfucker what about fatherfucker? Pardon Me= FUCK YOU!!:Blue Toyota reversing without yielding of a driveway facing a major highway, then when out of their way to haunt me down 2KM later to veer into the tiny shoulder/bike route where I was riding,& swerve mere millimeters into me to taunt & spook the air from within me! Piggies don't care what a news flash! If I wanted to vent I would have talked to a maple tree; I would tap it for sweet vegan syrup, not call the piggies! If only I could remember plates more efficiently!
Best regards- onyx road bike cycle bicycle

I've thought about this a lot said...

DILL WEED
RACIST SCREED
WHY PICK ON DILL
OVER THE HILL
PLUM WITHDRAWN
MOVIN' ON
RQ:
BE MY WIFE…
JUST DON'T
RUN ME,
OVER?

crosspalms said...

If you're in a pickle, you might just be a dill weed.

crosspalms said...

If it's 4:20, it might just be ordinary weed instead.

crosspalms said...

Somebody fire up WIWM's hammock-cycle, he's going to have to step in here pretty soon.

crosspalms said...

Roille, when I yell fire in a crowded theater (the-ay-tee), should I yell fie-er, fie-yah or far?

crosspalms said...

Trying to get to 100 without doing a lick of honest work

crosspalms said...

Autocorrect fixed my mispronunciation for me to make it wrong. The-AY-ter...

robot says it must be the testroe

crosspalms said...

Looking for that Milloy guy to take a pull here. Guess he's too busy running other people off the road.

Spokey said...

Queenie @ 4:03

have to agree. I was born in Brooklyn but won't go back voluntarily even to meet snobbie. I did go there a couple times when little peaches lived there but she gone portlandian now.

Not exactly in flyover now but I do get to smell the manure which in my mind is preferable to the oil refineries and car exhaust. BTW I don't find skunk so bad either but then I've only been privy to the aftermath and never been sprayed myself.

Although I don't bike tour as much anymore, my experience is that the country has both the nicest people and biggest dirtbags. But then so does the city.

Spokey said...

100?

Spokey said...

yes

crosspalms said...

or maybe he's sitting in a bar with Scott Simon, Delia Ephron, Dorothy Rabinowitz, and John Cassidy remembering the good old days when you could just put cyclists in a deeeeitch.

crosspalms said...

Nice work, Spokey!

Blog Drafter said...

Stupidity is okay if it's benign, it's malignant intelligence that has historically gotten the most people killed.

Spokey said...

thx

didn't even realize we were ready for the sprint until you @ 5:32

was too busy smelling cow shit.

Spokey said...

BD

there is plain ole stupidity

We reserve for people like Courtland Milloy the term of endearment: belligerently stupid

babble on said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
babble on said...

Ha! Speaking of which... Da Biebs is facing criminal charges. I wonder if he is actually related to Robba the Fords.

BamaPhred said...

RQ did not claim the coveted 420 Wednesday weed podium.

Belated congratulations.

Anonymous said...

"Warning, cyclist uses profanity."

Cyclist should have used 38 caliber.

Damn. And yes BSNYC I will be buying one of those flamey Walz caps.

And today's Tour stage was easily the most impressive and hellish stage of any race I have ever seen. Hats off to Boom and Nibali and frankly to every damn rider that rode that. I could not have ridden it with two hot IV bags of A+ Lance blood dope, a shot of shark testosterone and a jet fuel back pack.

Good Lord.

dnk said...

Fuck y'all Dillweed mothafuckas!

That's what I'm gonna say tomorrow when I'm passing a bunch of gridlock traffic assholes. And I ain't gonna have to pedal either 'cause I'm gonna be on the bike escalator.

leroy said...

Rain, torn up roads, slippery conditions. And that's just the ride home tonight.

Gotta go find some cobblestones.

babble on said...

Or you could head to Japan for a real breeze.

Anon, out another $7,999.99 said...

My new Gravel Grinder would'a eaten that stage up today, EATEN IT UP!

Dave said...

Stupidity can be benign, as when it removes the infected person altogether - like the recent contestant in a hotdog-eating contest who choked to death. But more often it is malignant and metastatic, as when stupid ideas infect masses of people who have no immunity to them, and they start thinking that hotdog-eating contests are cool, and so is running over cyclists, etc. And Hitler - let's drag him in by all means.

Some guy named Roland Barthes said, and it can't be repeated too often: "Stupidity is the most powerful force in the universe, because there's no answer to it."

Anonymous said...

My ass is flat. Watched World Cup, TdF and now watching Nats! beat the Orioles. Great afternoon. Grilled up some chicken and had a fine bottle of wine. congrats, Spokey. Nice pull, Crosspalms.

David Pearce said...

Jesus Christ! A person chucks a full bottle of Gatorade and it hits you, and you swear, and a huge truck tries to run you off the road and blows coal in your face, and a grand jury doesn't indict? And now the victim may be charged for free speech?! WTF???

Well, Fuck the grand jury!

Fuck the District Attorney!

And fuck the police!

And they can come and arrest me! I'm

David Pearce,
Washington, D.C.

David Pearce said...

A LEGITIMATE QUESTION FOR WILDCAT ROCK MACHINE:

You are always making fun of guys named Fred.

I'm about to read / listen to an NPR story about Amy Ta, a producer for Tell Me More, and her awful, very bad, no good day.

I'm not calling her anything. As Oscar Wilde wrote, "I ask merely for information," is there a female analogue for all assumedly male Fred's out there, and if so, what is her name?

David,
Georgetown, D.C.

(P.S. ....Location is a clue for the detectives and NSA watchers trying to track me down!)

Angry Beaver said...

Optional equipment for the E-Z Bike is a dilldo.

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RoadQueen said...

I'm going to propose that the female term for the Fredly inclined be Wilma. Or has this been covered in the past?

Freds ride on their scranus.

Wilmas ride on their vulvanus.

BIKE WIMN

JLRB said...

More response to Milloyidiot

On my ride in today I tried my best to feel like a bully amongst the 2,000+ pound smog machines, but I just didn't have it in me

JB said...

Wilmas, of course.

babble on said...

Doris. Girl Freds are sometimes called Doris, too.

Anonymous said...

Fredette, Frederique, Betty, also, mostly I just think "hotness" and try not to act like a pervert.

McFly said...

Blog Drafter @ 5:44 COD FTW

Dave said...

What a fortuitous coincidence - I was just planning a trip to Hyderabad, and I had no idea as to how to track down some classy escorts to adorn my tuxedo-clad arm as I attend all those tedious state dinners that I must go to. Thanks, "Rathod"!

And when I attend these dinners I am often partial to salmon poached in a fine white wine and sprinkled with a bit of fresh dillweed.

CommieCanuck said...

Snob..was in Brooklyn yesterday.
I didn't see you.
You weren't in Terrytown either.
I want my money back.

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