Wednesday, August 1, 2018

So Many Bikes, So Little Time (Unless I Give Up My Daily Nap, Which I Refuse To Do)

As I mentioned yesterday, I've got a lot to test--and it ain't just limited to awesome stuff people send me, either.  I've also got to test out New York City's infrastructure, which is where I've been today:
See, we just got Jump bikes in the Bronx, and as the curator of the Bike Forecast it was recumbent upon me to try them out.  (If you're wondering how they are, you can head over there tomorrow to read all about it, but the short version is that they're great when they're working, which they mostly were not.)

So in summary, in order to dig my way out of the Testing Hole in which I now reside, I must:


  • Install hitch rack onto The Car The Bank Owns Until I Finish Paying Them Back
  • Put Jones onto hitch rack and go somewhere so I can test both all simultaneous-like
  • Install new chain on Renovo so I can resume testing (final verdict pending until completion of 2018 road racing season)
  • Conduct additional Drysdale testing, weather permitting (need to see how it handles "gravel" bike duties)
Oh, and at my Designated Juvenile Tester's request I've installed cyclocross tires on the Islabikes Luath 24:


(Cyclocross tires not shown because I forgot to take a pitcher.)

I then must subject him to intensive dismount/remount drills pending requisition of an appropriately loud megaphone.

Whew!

And for the commenter who mentioned my taking on an intern to help me with these duties, I've already done that in the past, and while I no doubt set my former intern on the path to success his tenure did not increase the efficiency of my operation in any way.

So you can tell the HR department to shove it.

35 comments:

Chazu said...

I remember that blogular entry from 2010 like it was yesterday.

HDEB said...

Nice pitcher! Fun times with the kiddos : )

Anonymous said...

Podium?

make it rain on dem pros said...

I've been using Jump bike in SF for ~6 months and I love it.

You can tell that the company started out designing bikes for bike share, then later got into the customer-facing stuff. I think the bike itself is noticeably better than GoBike, right down to little things like the fact that the seatpost can't rotate more than a few degrees, making it easier to adjust.

Ellie said...

Hey Tan! I still can't believe that you are going to have to return the Tenovo!!

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...wait, you have an HR department? Could I apply for a position there?

cyclejerk said...

HR Dept? Eff that, and interns. They just get in my way.

Anonymous said...

From $150 Walmart bikes to $10,000. Tan Tenovo's: Your Stock has certainly risen!!

-Mas

Olle Nilsson said...

I thought "Vito is successful now?" but then I vaguely remember you had an actual human intern and Vito was just a helper. Why I let this stuff fill my head, I'll never know.

JLRB said...

Will the Jump be vertically stiff enough?

My limited test of the stand-alone, non-docked-bikeshare-bicycles was they were flimsy pieces of shit, and the one I tried failed to let me log back in after I ran into a store.

biorider said...

I'm all for naps!

Crosspalms said...

Running way behind on Outside columns, still stuck on the four letters every driver should know (STFU), and thinking about what happened to me the other day on my way to the grocery. I stopped at a stop sign by the minimall, stuck out my right arm and made a slow right into the parking lot, when a guy on the sidewalk yelled “wrong arm for a right turn” I admired his conciseness but still wanted to punch him. Took me a day to think of a response (“that shirt with those pants??”), but by then we were both gone. Eons ago I learned hand signals in driver’s ed, left arm out for a left, left arm bent up for a right, but I’m curious what the rest of you do to signal a right turn (talking American here, but I bet left-side-of-roaders have similar experiences). Mostly I see right arm out for a right. Most of the times I see someone hold their left arm bent upward they’re signaling a stop. I realize I’m in the minority of people who actually signal (especially drivers—seriously, how hard is it?), but is this just another case of You Just Can’t Win, or should I revert to the signals of my ancestors?

Anonymous said...

Your on a bike, not a car. Point to where you are going. Move your arm like it's a blinker. Drivers aren't paying attention anyway.

bad boy of the south said...

Left arm bent up,turn right.left arm straight, left turn. left arm,partially bent downwards, signaling slow. same arm crooked at elbow with your hand facing downward,stop.that's all I've got.

Some guy from upstate said...

Snob Tenovo (in his latest book) and the New York Bicycle Coalition say left arm up or right arm out, either one. Although I think Snob will mock you for using the old time car-centric left arm version. At a stop light, I do both, like I'm in the Safety Dance video.

BamaPhred said...

Personally, I wave and point like a madman in the direction I want to go. It doesn’t matter. I’m invisible, you see.

Anonymous said...

The left arm @ a right angle BS was developed for cars where other drivers can't see your right arm, because, presumably it's on the steering wheel. I personally have not used that for many years, I typically just point my right or left Hand in the corresponding direction.

I figure even if the driver does not know what that means, at least they are alerted that I am doing SOMETHING.

-Mas

Anonymous said...

I mock masturbate to get attention, whether on the bike or not

pbateman likes nice bikes but also likes cookies said...

You'll need two trailer hitches:

One Campy made chrome hitch for when you are carrying your vintage rides. They have a special finish coating they apply so the chrome can not be sucked off by any of your more promiscuous friends.

One carbon hitch for the likes of your Tenovo or other virgin redwood forest sourced frames.

I'm less concerned about the destruction of rare trees for your fancy bike and more concerned about the impact on cookie production. Any mention of that in their literature? Do they assist in moving the elves and their kitchens or do they just rip right into the trees with their Husky 3120xp's?

bad boy of the south said...

Waiting for the mock....10,9,8,7...

bad boy of the south said...

ok,righty tighty,lefty lucy,ahem,loosey.

bad boy of the south said...

now,that's all i've got.'til later.

FR8 said...

Let me know if the hitch rack can handle the Work Cycle!

cyclejerk said...

Trudat. When I use the car-centric right turn signal, drivers wave at me.

Anonymous said...

crosspalms, a good response would be, "Yeah, if this thing had windows, I'd be using my left arm."

If we had long enough arms, we'd signal with the right arm in a car. Otherwise, how would this guy explain how we place turn signals on the car? Left turn signal for left turns and the left turn signal turned sideways for right turns?

N/A said...

I was taught in the driver's education the same routine that Bad Boy lists @ 3:06 AM. Obviously you use your left arm for all the signalling, because you're holding your beer with your right hand and steering with your knee. Giving people the finger takes precedence over signalling your turns, naturally.


When I'm making bike rides, I don't signal shit. I never turn, 'cause that is where danger happens. Just straight ahead, my friends.

Anonymous said...

I just ordered the same rack - Saris Superclamp EX - after reading some reviews and getting recommendations on Reddit. I did, in fact, read the blog post with the photo of it beforehand, so that's already one purchase that you can take credit for with your sponsors.

Pist Off said...

Colorado actually passed a law allowing cyclists to signal turns with the corresponding arm. Since on a bike we don’t have a car door/window or moto throttle tying up our right arm why not? Even a truck driver should be able to understand if you’re pointing where you’re going.

The campaign for the CO law was led by Ken Chlouber, the guy who started the Leadville 100 event AFAIK, who happened to be a State Senator and cyclist.

I find either arm works equally well to flip off drivers yelling traffic law opinions.

Suggesting said...

The old timey left arm up was designed for righties who can't hold on the bars with one left hand.

Unknown said...

The proper way way to fold a tubular (or, an alternative to the unholy mess under your scranus)

https://get.google.com/albumarchive/108112939684385339347/album/AF1QipPtL-ztpTkQpbZuYCOLLRqajArBp7V7bkdKBEw?source=pwa

BikeSnobNYC said...

Unknown,

Wow, what a huge difference, it is ever so slightly shorter.

Now that it's 2018 you should learn the proper way to embed a link (or, an alternative to the unholy mess in your comment).

--Tan Tenovo

bad boy of the south said...

N/A lol.dat vas a gut von.

Seattle lone wolf said...

Unknown, report to the Burn Unit.

Well done, TT!

Joe said...

We got Jump and Lime bikes on Staten Island about a week ago. They seem to be popular. I haven't ridden either, as I have my own very nice bike.

JLRB said...

I think the left arm still works better than the right because drivers are looking down the street, not off to the side for your arm. I don't always signal but when I do signal a right turn I do a weird point with your raised left arm. Extreme dork style.