Monday, April 24, 2017

It's Not An Adventure If You Don't Measure Every Second Of It

If you missed the BSNYC BOOMB!* Pre-Fondon't Ride this past Saturday then you missed the BSNYC BOOMB! Pre-Fondon't Ride this past Saturday:


(Photo by Jem)

Hills were scaled, derailleurs were destroyed, and the passive voice was employed afterwards by me to sum it all up.  Rest assured there will be a full accounting of the ride (in the active voice) in the not-too-eventual future.  In the meantime, the success of the ride (and by "success" I mean nobody pelted me with stones afterwards) gives me the confidence to curate a full-blown BSNYC Gran Fondon't ride in the coming weeks:


(Artist's rendering of what a Gran Fondo could look like, but won't.)

So stay tuned, and in the meantime thanks to everyone who rode on Saturday.

Indeed, the only thing that would have made the ride even better would have been if I'd been using a state-of-the-art power meter:


Yes, nothing says "adventure" like meticulously quantifying every facet of your mediocrity.

If you're wondering about what makes it adventure-specific, it's that if you don't meet specific fitness goals it simply falls off the bicycle, leaving you stranded in the wilderness.

And no, nobody jumped over a Lamborghini at any point during the ride either (that I'm aware of, anyway) but you can't have everything:



And another angle:



This is an entire genre of video apparently, who knew?


It's also now my favorite style of video.

Hey, you wanna drive a $300,000 shim around town you don't get to "curate" what kind of attention you receive.

Some people will be impressed, others will think you're a douchebag, and still others will just wanna ride over that shit.

If you want to inspire complete indifference while driving I recommend a Hyundai:


I mean I could have a Lamborghini if I wanted, I just choose not to:


(Evidently their interest in performance stops the moment they step out of the car.)

What would really impress me though would be seeing someone hop a Lamborghini on a folding bike--and speaking of folding bikes, Dahon has launched a Kickstarter for their new Curl model:




Which, as far as I can tell, is basically a Brompton:



Or am I crazy?


By the way, the US leg of the Brompton World Championships will take place in New York City this year:


As always, the Brompton World Championship USA will begin with a "Le Mans" style start, with each competitor racing to his or her folded bike before unfolding and taking off on the course, which consists of ten laps around NYC's Marcus Garvey Park. Brompton owners from all corners of the country are invited to compete in the United States leg of the Brompton World Championship series.

I've been flirting with the idea of entering this race, and if I can figure out how to retrofit an Oral-B electric toothbrush into a secret motor you could very well be looking at your new champion.

Just let me know whether you think I should race or not via this online poll and I'll do whatever you decide:


Lastly, I was very sad to learn about the death of Michele Scarponi:


Scarponi was killed on Saturday morning when he was struck by a van while training just two kilometres from his home. The driver of the van was a 57-year-old local man. “We know each other well. I’ve lost a son, but I’m thinking of him too,” Scarponi’s father, Giacomo, said.

Enjoy every ride, it's all you can do.

52 comments:

EricBikeCO said...

Everyone still tired from the Fondont...

KellyAnn said...

Can't figure out how to get my helmet off.

dop said...

My Back! In Blue! On the Internets!

(scranus)

wishiwasmerckx said...

Fourth!

Chazu said...

More coffee please

Anonymous said...

Looks like at least one person rode up the hill on the pre-Fondont.

boys on the hoods said...

top ten!!

N/A said...

I'm glad you all survived the BOOMB, I cannot wait to read the full write-up on it.

Freddy Murcks said...

I'd choose Babble's pink canoe 1000X over a Lamborghini Douche Canoe.

Bryan Bracy said...

in at 10

Old Timer said...

Huh? What?

Anonymous said...

More lamocross vids pleeze.

Anonymous said...

Did the Monterey Sea Otter Classic Gran Fondo this weekend. Would rather have been on the BSNYC Pre-Fondont...

N/A said...

I didn't get to do my own independant PreFondon't ride on Saturday, as weather and schedule were not conducive to it. As such, I didn't feel it was appropriate to send a picture of my crotch to Wildcat for a blogular addition at some non-specific future time.

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...Sorry I missed the BOOMB. My gravel specific wheelset didn't arrive on time.

herzogone said...

Finally, Dahon will offer a rigid-frame aluminum folder as compact as the Brompton, but for only... 100% of the price of a Brompton?!

JB said...

You're funny.

JB said...

Also, I thought Dahons were already Brompton-y folders? Do I need to be a folder-Fred to pick up the nuances here?

Fred Merrcury said...

Why do existing companies use kickstarter? Isn't that R&D? I guess they just decide to run it up the flagpole and see who salutes.
Very tragic about Mr. Scarponi. I feel for his family. I keep putting off writing my will, but maybe I shouldn't.

Anonymous said...

Why is averybody pushing their bike in the first picture?

Anonymous said...

Why is everybody pushing their bike in the first picture?

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 1:56/2:00pm,

It's tough to see in the pic but the final pitch of that hill is unrideable...but don't let that detract from the smug sense of self-satisfaction you get from thinking everyone was walking when you would have ridden.

--Wildcat Etc.

N/A said...

Nobody was running the correct pressure for the PreGranFondon't BOOMB ride, hence the hike-a-bike. Wildcat don't fuck around with course selection!

N/A said...

I'da had to stop, like, 10 times for a beer hand-up (sometimes you gotta' hand 'em up to yourself) just walking up that mountain.

JLRB said...

I see the $5 surcharge for foamhats must have reeled in at least enough to cover a stop at the taco truck.

You can hold out on the ride details for a future blog, but how were the beers?

Anonymous said...

Lamborghini hopping... The kids are alright as they say. Would love to see more of that!

Spokey said...

top XXX as they say

did my own bombie here but can't remember where i went or whether i took any pichers

Steve said...

As a bonafide folder fred, I can assure you that dahons are not brompton-like at all.

As a folder fred, I'm often consulted by folks I know about which folder they should get. After extolling the virtues of the swift, brompton, and bike friday I am invariably asked my opinion on the dahon equivalent that costs half as much.

I tell these people if you wanna save some money get a used Raleigh 20 on Craigslist as it's likely to last longer and give them less trouble than a new dahon.


FWIW, @ yesterday's tour de Staten Island in addition to my swift I spotted one Dahon, 2 Bromptons and a bike friday.

Anonymous said...

I have seen a Bike Friday with clip-on aero-bars.

1904 Cadardi said...

Nobody talks about Volvo hopping. Is there no sport in jumping over the box that other cars come in?

Spokey said...


i jumped my aero-bars once.

and don't pay any attention to spousy claiming i really tripped over them when they were lying on the floor.

Fred Fredriksen said...

Is that hill unrideable on an E-Bike?

Helmets are for losers said...

hahaha, looks like the helmet worshippers had to ride/walk at the back of the ride, because of the shame factor.....

Cat 404 e-Racer said...

I read:
"and by "success" I mean nobody pelted me with stones afterwards"

and my mind goes to a scene in the Life of Brian where genXers and Yuppies are trying to rent beards so that they can stone Bikesnob.

Dooth said...

Boomp, there it went. I'll never Fondon’t. It's a Fondonut for me. I'm a twenty minute ride from B'way and ninth, but l shan't be there because of scheduling conflict. Wouldn't a weekday Fondon't full of non-9 to 5 folk, like Wildcat, be nice?

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

I wish I came to the Pre Fondont, bout I am just an olde twit. Glad everyone jad a good ride. Cant wait to hear the exciting details.

leroy said...

The last pitch of that hill in the pre-fondon't picture isn't just unrideable, it's almost unwalkable as in you could almost fall over backwards in front of a bunch of folks with cameras.

Don't ask me how I know.

Or why my dog was "making walking and chewing gum" jokes all Sunday.

Lieutenant Oblivious said...

Greetings from the Left Coast, otherwise I would have been a Prefondon't-er!

Tell us about the beers of the Prefondon't and of course what we can therefore expect for the beers of the main event Fondon't. I am particularly fond of IPA's.

Gimmeabeer said...

# Whathopyourunning

Barry Tantlinger said...

The Curl is definitely a Brompton clone. However, this is something like the eighth year Dahon has announced its release. It is the definition of bicycling vaporware.

Sun-dried Spoke Protector said...

Did Brooks curate a selection of dark beers with tasting notes consisting of chamfered leathers​ and the presumedly sour sweat of Eric?

der Blaue Reiter kann leider nicht hoppen said...

Ah: "you don't get to 'curate' what kind of attention you receive." A blast from the BSNYC past!

And although I always enjoy the blog, I actually laughed out loud at "It's also now my favorite style of video." Because yeah, mine too.

Some guy from upstate said...

I'll be impressed when I see the video of a bmx rider jumping this Lambo: https://images.cdn.autocar.co.uk/sites/autocar.co.uk/files/styles/gallery_slide/public/images/car-reviews/first-drives/legacy/lambo-lm002-2015023.jpg?itok=6ES2gCcy

paulb said...

I am surprised at a direct-to-consumer offer from Dahon. The company is notoriously resistant to dealing directly with owners. (Though I've had my Dahon since August '07 and still like it a lot. I rode it the full length of the OCA, once.)

paulb said...

Little dig at Brand X there: "I hope they've filed a patent." Friendly rivalry. Not?

JLRB said...

Dog bites man - not news
Man bites dog - news (looking at you Leroy)

Car jumps bike - no criminality suspected
Bike jump car - Youtube sensation

Jake said...

At 2:50 in Dahon video, they boast of their "innovative" 3*2 gearing system that they copied ( along with most other design features ) from Brompton, the the narrator boldly states " I hope we've filed a patent" on it!
I always assumed that Brompton adopted this, frankly terrible, gearing arrangement, as opposed to a 5 speed hub, due to space constraints in their original frame or some such. I can't see why someone would wish emulate it 40 years later.

Jake said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jake said...

I've been scouring the streets of the city in search of a Lambo or similar that is parked in the bike lane so I can legitimize riding up on the hood, over the roof, and down the trunk.

Extra style points for a tricky aero-spoiler dismount, and if the douche driver and trophy girlfriend are still aboard.

bieks said...

You wouldn't have had to walk that hill if you had a Dahon Curl with 3 speeds that can climb any hill (Mr. Hon obviously hasn't been to my neighbourhood). He seems very critical of the "Brand X" bike that he blatantly copied. Comes across as a little douchey. I've spent a lot of time on his website, but after that video, I'm thinking one folding bike (brand X) is enough.

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