Friday, March 13, 2015

BSNYC Friday Inordinately Huge Line For a Sub-Par Food Truck!

Good news for Portlanders!  They never have to work again!

(Sorry, just kidding about the "again" part.)

Soon, America's favorite artisanal layabouts can just buy a bike and craft while the cash rolls (or at least trickles) in, thanks to their new "user-owned bike-sharing system:"


Here's the story from BikePortland:


A share of the revenue from each rental, Spinlister says, will go to each bike’s owner. (As with Spinlister’s existing peer-to-peer bike rental system, Spinlister will presumably get a cut.) The company even says that it “has plans to subsidize and finance the bicycles to allow users to pay the bicycles back through rental revenue over time.”

Naturally, this raises some questions:

There are a lot of unanswered questions here. How much will the bikes cost to buy? Who sets the rental prices? Who will keep the tires pumped? If a bike gets damaged, who decides who has to pay for repairs? If the brakes fail at the wrong moment and someone rolls into a fire hydrant, whose insurance policy is liable?

Though my main question is:

You're really going to rely on the average schmuck to lock the bike correctly?


At least with Citi Bike you have to use an actual station wait for the green light to tell you that you did it right.  With this system it seems like just a matter of time before some bonehead locks a bike to a table leg and someone comes along, lifts the table, and makes off with the bike.

Also, the bikes seem too nice.

I guess we'll see.

Meanwhile, here in New York, we received a visit from a woman who's circumnavigating the globe via human power:



On the New Jersey side of the bridge, she met a photographer for The Times, Ashley Gilbertson.

He was also on a bike.

Mr. Gilbertson is making a documentary about bicycle messengers — from his own fixed-gear bike — so he had no problem taking Ms. Outen’s portrait while riding.

“It was a bit better shooting Sarah than the bike messengers,” he said. “Sarah, thankfully for me, not for her, was on a 150-pound bike.”

“She could only go so fast.”

He added, “It’s such a ‘Welcome to New York.’ You meet an Australian on a track bike who starts taking pictures of you as you cross the bridge.”

I would have turned around and gone straight back to Jersey.

Clearly she's a better person than I am though, and she even helped a Brompton rider fix a flat:
This was very considerate of her, but why was repairing it even necessary?  Why not just carry a second Brompton with you?

And now, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz.  As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer.  If you're right you will inherit the Earth, and if you're wrong you'll see a commercial.

Thanks very much for reading, ride safe, and always carry at least one spare Brompton.


--Wildcat Rock Machine






1) .-- .... .- - / .. ... / - .... . / -. --- -.- . ..--..

--  .- / -.- . -.-- .-.. . ... ... / -... .. -.- . / .-.. --- -.-. -.-
--  .- / .-.. --- -.-. -.- .-.. . ... ... / -... .. -.- . / -.- . -.--
--  .- / --. --- -.. .-.. . ... ... / ..-. ..- -.-. -.- .- - ..- .-.. .- .-. / .. -. / - .... . / -- .. -. -.. / --- ..-. / .--- . ... ..- ...
--  .- / .--. .- ... - .- / -- .- -.. . / ..-. .-. --- -- / .--. --- - .- - --- . ...







2) Freds need incessant hand-holding, even when it comes to making a doody.

--True
--False








3) Which is a sign that fat bikes are like sooo over?

--Target sells them
--George Hincapie rides them
--Spring is like a week away
--All of the above








4) How much for these derailleur pulleys?

--$100
--$1,000
--$10,000
--Your soul








5) Inside the fairing, the rider is making "Pew-Pew-Pew!" laser sounds.

--True
--False





(UCI president Brian Cookson)


6) Which is not one of the measures the UCI is undertaking in the wake of the CIRC report?

--Work to enshrine a fit-and-proper-persons requirement in the team licensing process, focussed on the key roles in the staff, such as sports directors and doctors
--Work with the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) and other experts to analyse new substances and trends, to assess what should be added to the prohibited or monitored lists
--Work with WADA to improve the speed of athlete biological passport cases
--Work closely in order to further work in close proximity with those working to proactively effectuate the elimination of doping aw fuck it nobody's even reading this does anybody actually buy this bullshit? 








7) Ahoy, Water Freds!  The Schiller S1 is the Fixie of the Sea!

--True
--False



***Special "This Guy Has No Idea What He's Talking About"-Themed Bonus Video***



Please send me the tires, they're perfectly fine.