Friday, May 29, 2015

BSNYC Friday No Quiz, Because When I Get Angry There's No Quiz

Greetings from New York, America's Most Bike-Friendly City according to Bicycling magazine!

There are a lot of reasons why we're number one: our incrementally expanding bike infrastructure; our courteous police department; our mindful drivers...  Without a doubt though our greatest asset as a cycling city is our enlightened media:

Consider the front page of yesterday's New York Post, which I'm not going to link to because fuck 'em.  Basically they're now following the so-called "killer cyclist" who collided with a pedestrian in Central Park and waiting for him to screw up, which he eventually did (well, sort of), much to the delight of Rupert Murdoch's ball-ticklers.

So what did he do?

He ran a red light while carrying his kid on his bike:

The saxophonist slowed down as he approached a red light on Park Avenue at East 118th Street — but blew through the signal rather than wait for it to turn green.

Okay.  This guy?  Not a fan.  He hit a woman while riding his bike in Central Park and she died as a result.  Nobody seems to know for sure how fast he was going or who had the light but as far as I'm concerned it doesn't matter.  It's a park.  Even if you're going 5mph and you hit somebody you were going too goddamn fast.  Furthermore, the fact that he wasn't charged doesn't necessarily absolve him, because this is New York City, and we fail to charge drivers who kill people on nearly a daily basis.

All of the above notwithstanding, what the Post is doing here is disgusting.  First of all, read the quote above and tell me how he could have "slowed down as he approached a red light" and then "blew through the signal."  This defies physics.  You can't slow and then blow.  Everybody knows that--especially people who work for the Post, because Rupert Murdoch is constantly reminding them of this while they're fellating him.

("Don't slow, blow!," admonishes Murdoch as he pushes an employee's head downward.)

Secondly, when has the Post ever followed a motorist who's killed somebody?  Granted, I realize there's a practical reason for this, which is that last year motorists killed 178 cyclists and pedestrians in New York City.  Certainly the Post can't follow all these drivers.  It's simple mathematics.  After all, if everyone's busy chasing drivers then who's left to blow Murdoch?

("Where is everyone?!?  I need a blowie here!!!")

Thirdly--and this is the big one--they put a great big picture of this guy's kid on the front page!  Just imagine this kid walking past a deli and asking his father why he's on the front of the newspaper.  I don't care what this guy did, just thinking about that kid having to experience that is fucking heartbreaking--and I'd think the same thing if his father had killed someone with a car or a plane or even a goddamn steamroller for that matter.

Then, to top it all off, these lowlives at the Post publish were the kid goes to school!

He rode on the sidewalk on [deleted], between [deleted], and then dropped off his young son at the [deleted].

That's just sick.

By the way, I'm sure that was quite the two-wheeled homicidal death rampage when he rode his bike onto the sidewalk in front of his kid's school, which I do all the goddamn time when I drop my own kid off, much to the delight of his classmates.

And how about that light-running?  You know, the one where he did the ol' "slow-to-blow?"  Well, the Post includes a video of it (which is remarkably audacious as it obviates pretty much every word of the article) and here's what happened.  First, he slowly approaches the light:

Then he comes to a complete stop and puts his foot down:

Then he waits for traffic to pass:

Then, when there's no more traffic (or pedestrians) he slowly resumes riding:

And the light turns green like two seconds later:

So basically, when the coast was clear he jumped the light by a couple seconds, which is understandable.  Not only is he BEING FOLLOWED BY A REPORTER, but I'd also argue this is sometimes safer than waiting for the green, owing to the addled motorist dickbags waiting behind you in pole position:

("Did someone say 'pole position?'  I'll position my pole in your face, mate!")

Anyway, I had to know what kind of person follows a kid to school and then publishes a picture of him on the front page of a newspaper in a city of 8 million-plus people, so I used a popular search engine, typed the reporter's name into it, and found this:

Altoona native and former boxer Kevin Fasick tells some tough tales as a New York Post staff reporter.

Yep, just a small town hack from Palookaville trying to make it in the big city. And to be fair, he does tell some tough tales:

"As far as how I deal with the tragedy I often encounter on my job, on some level you have to compartmentalize it for your own sanity," he wrote in an email. "But the sadness often sticks with you and you have to deal with that as part of the job. I did a story of a little girl, 12-year-old Nicole Suriel, who drowned on a class trip. I spent a couple of hours in her parents' apartment.

"The father was telling us about his little girl, getting on the computer and getting photos for the photographer, while the mom stayed in the bedroom and wailed in grief. That was a long day and at the end of it, it hit me pretty hard."

Which is another way of saying he's a vulture who feeds on human tragedy:

He tells them, "You're a human being first, and what's going to make you a good reporter is by being a good human being. What we want to do is honor their loved one who may have been murdered, killed in a car wreck, died in fire, what have you. We're there to tell their stories."

Presumably then he was honoring the victim of the Central Park tragedy by stalking this guy's kid.  Of course, given his concern for the victim, you may be wondering why he doesn't do the same thing to drivers.  Well, the answer is simple: convenience.  See, the "killer cyclist" and the reporter both live in the same neighborhood, so all he has to do is roll out of bed and start stalkin'.  As for the other stories he relentlessly pursues in the service of justice, here's just a smattering:

Yeah, he's the Woodward and Bernstein of overpriced hot dogs.

And what of the New York Times?  They're better than the Post, right?  Well, sure, but that doesn't mean their editorial department is immune to a little implicit victim-blaming.  Consider this horrible story:

And before anything else, let's look at the headline:

Wait a minute.  The car was fleeing the court police?  Is the driver not responsible?  Was it one of those new Google self-fleeing cars?

Okay, so they try to pull the driver over (sorry, they try to pull the car over, I sometimes forget that in America a driver is just a hapless passenger with no culpability who happens to be sitting in front of a steering wheel at a given moment), the Apple iFlee protocol kicks in, and the Mercedes (again, not the driver, the Mercedes) hits the Cannondale (this is important why?), on top of which happens to be sitting a neuroscientist:

The hectic getaway killed Sergei Musatov, 42, an assistant professor of neuroscience in neurological surgery at Weill Cornell Medical College, a spokesman for the school said. He was riding west on East 129th Street near the Third Avenue Bridge when the Mercedes hit his Cannondale bicycle from behind, the police said. The impact sent Dr. Musatov hurtling into the windshield of the Mercedes and then onto the asphalt.

At which point the pressing question now somehow becomes WAS THE CYLIST WEARING A HELMENT???

A police spokesman said he did not know whether Dr. Musatov, who earned his doctoral degree from Saint Petersburg State University in Russia in 1998, had been wearing a helmet.

Oh for fuck's sake.

But don't worry, because there's going to be an "accident investigation:"

David Bookstaver, a spokesman for the state court system, said on Thursday that officials were waiting for the police department’s accident investigation before determining what role the court officers may have played in the crash. He said the officers were driving from the Bronx courts to the Harlem Community Justice Center on a routine patrol when the Mercedes ran the red light. He said the officers had responded so quickly because the Mercedes nearly struck their car.

"Accident investigation?"  How the hell does anybody--the court spokesman, the police, the reporter--possibly use the word "accident" in connection with a circumstance in which a driver was fleeing from a traffic stop, killed somebody in the process, and then fled the scene?

That's one big-ass "oopsie."

Furthermore, what is an "accident investigation?"  The first word completely undermines the second.  Aren't you supposed to investigate something before declaring it an accident?  When you do that in business it's called "creative accounting," i.e. "embezzling."  Yet the Times can somehow print the phrase "accident investigation" with a straight face.

Just imagine other tragic news stories employed similar syntax as stories about motor vehicle violence.  This:

Would become this:

Bronx Boy, 14, Killed by Bullet Fleeing Gun

And of course this:

Would become this:

Suddenly, at about 8:30 a.m., a Smith and Wesson approached Christopher, at which point a bullet emerged from it and entered his face.  His brother and his friend took shelter under the protective life-giving cars that line the city's streets.  Law enforcement officials did not know whether Christopher was wearing a bulletproof vest.  Or a helmet.

And naturally this:

Would become this:

Accident investigators are like, "That sucks, accidents happen."

Now I'm certainly not saying the Times are being malicious here.  It's just a symptom of how deeply ingrained driver absolution is in our culture.  We all do it to some degree, because at this point our language has evolved to distance drivers from their actions.  As the article above reveals, the way we speak is full of loopholes.  (The driver didn't do it, the car did.)  It's like those devices that help Jews cheat the Sabbath--if the gizmo is Rube Goldberg-esque enough then the user can claim they're not violating the law, but the fact of the matter is that turning on a light is still turning on a light.  Linguistically, we treat cars and drivers like Jews and lightswitches, placing an ultimately meaningless gap of passivity between them that serves to absolve them.

Now have a great weekend!


--Wildcat Rock Machine


Unknown said...

18. Modern leftish philosophers tend to dismiss reason, science, objective reality and to insist that everything is culturally relative. It is true that one can ask serious questions about the foundations of scientific knowledge and about how, if at all, the concept of objective reality can be defined. But it is obvious that modern leftish philosophers are not simply cool-headed logicians systematically analyzing the foundations of knowledge. They are deeply involved emotionally in their attack on truth and reality. They attack these concepts because of their own psychological needs. For one thing, their attack is an outlet for hostility, and, to the extent that it is successful, it satisfies the drive for power. More importantly, the leftist hates science and rationality because they classify certain beliefs as true (i.e., successful, superior) and other beliefs as false (i.e., failed, inferior). The leftist’s feelings of inferiority run so deep that he cannot tolerate any classification of some things as successful or superior and other things as failed or inferior. This also underlies the rejection by many leftists of the concept of mental illness and of the utility of IQ tests. Leftists are antagonistic to genetic explanations of human abilities or behavior because such explanations tend to make some persons appear superior or inferior to others. Leftists prefer to give society the credit or blame for an individual’s ability or lack of it. Thus if a person is “inferior” it is not his fault, but society’s, because he has not been brought up properly.

Gnarlynickb said...


Unknown said...


Anonymous said...


babble on said...

Lol! Missed the podium commenting on yesterday's post. Looks like I need better drugs... :-/

Anonymous said...



Blog Drafter said...

Geez, I'd throw my bikes away right now but after reading that I'm afraid to leave the house.

dnk said...

Great post today, Snob.

Anonymous said...

read the post first, and just.... fuck.

babble on said...

Brilliant post. You fucking rock, Snobi Wan. If only the rest of the world would wake up and Get. It.

Trixie Smith said...

"You fucking rock, Snobi Wan."

Like this?

dop said...


P. Bateman said...

well, on a lighter note the sabbath cheating devices are pretty hilarious. i love that some nuts are sitting around dreaming up ways to end-around god/GOD/Godess...whoever. just adorable.

everyone ride safe.

nocar said...

Preach it brother.

paulb said...

Yes. Kudos, WCRM.

janinedm said...

I dunno, after killing the cyclist, the driver of the Mercedes stuck another car so they'll probably look into this case. I mean, a car was damaged!


Yeah buddy, bringing the HEAT!

Fred Mercury said...

I have bee gone awhile. I think it best not to respond to Ted K. except to say, "get your own blog, asshole."
Fasick, you're a big bag of crap!

dop said...

OK, now that I read it, I can see you're angry. (I have a BA & didn't say 'your')

I had a dinner conversation that touched on this point. A neighbor complained about all the cyclists in Westchester. (can you imagine? My wife & I fed this woman. She asked, "If I'm a car, why do I have to wait for all these bicycles, when I'm in a hurry?". (I never said I was an English major).

I parsed it as best I could that she was not a car.

And for the millionth time, I'm not a robot.

Anonymous said...

WCRM you are at your best when pissed off.

Sadly, there is much to be pissed off about.

trama said...

I like it when you are mad. Great stuff, unfortunately. WTF with the kid-stalking? Now I'm mad.

Anonymous said...

"Where is everyone?!? I need a blowie here!!!")

Anonymous said...


McFly said...

I had a slow blow once. It was at a 3-way, though. Not a 4-way. So it's probably not relevant. Not much I say is.

Anonymous said...

In the accident investigation they did not report if the cannondale was aluminum or carbon.

babble on said...

We should turn it around, and publicly out, stalk and shame all of the drivers who have killed people... oh wait. That monumental task would take all of the people in China and then some, so great are their numbers.

But it must be possible to check the driving records of the staff at the Washington Post. Anyone who has ever been caught speeding, distracted driving, rolling through a stop sign or blowing a red should be similarly stalked, and maybe someone could quietly suggest to them that we know where their children go to school, and that our stalking has resulted in photos of those very children, too. Fuck. Talk about sinking low. That's downright slimy. But speeding cars kill a LOT of people. Why isn't it a criminal offense to have more than one speeding ticket?! It should be. People caught driving whilst texting ought to lose their cars the way drunks do, so dangerous is it... a vehicle is a weapon, and driving it too fast or without due care and attention is every bit as dangerous as waving around a loaded gun.

Oh, and remember: cars don't kill people. People kill people. Dangerous drivers should be locked the fuck up.

Grrrrr. I'm mad too, and not just stark raving, either. This has just gone too far. Something has GOT to change, and it really should begin with those wankers at the Post, and with their irresponsible buddies in the Transit union, too. Unless people wake up to the insane hypocricy, humanity is going to drive itself right into the ground.

Vernal Magina said...

It finally occurred to me yesterday, reading that NY Times article about the car that inadvertently nudged a velocipedist sort of and then kinda floated away by grace of the wind from the court officers who were in mild pursuit of said car --

I think it's typical for a News Source of Record, when reporting on automobile collisions -- like car-on-car, ass-to-ass, etc; like on the New Jersey Turnpike, or wherever -- to state whether or not occupants of these fast-moving automobiles where wearing seat belts

I guess what the Gray Lady doesn't take into account is that seat belt-wearing in an automobile is not categorically the same thing as wearing a bicycle helment on a bicycle

Comment deleted said...

*New York* Post, Babs, but everything else you said is right on.

The Magnificent Omri said...

Good on you for not linking to the Post's festival of douchebaggery...and well, in general. Thanks for doing you.

David Pearce said...

[In the voice of David Letterman]

Ted, you First Place Podium Goaltender,

Dude, you gotta take a chill pill!

If the system breaks down the consequences will still be very painful. But the bigger the system grows the more disastrous the results of its breakdown will be, so if it is to break down it had best break down sooner rather than later.

Take your hoodie off. Take your cap off. It's hot out. Maybe you're suffering from a bit of heat stroke.

El Profesor said...

Which means the police department are basically car drivers' shabbos goys.

English is funny about avoiding blame but in Spanish it's even worse - you don't knock over a lamp, the lamp "falls itself." You don't forget your pencil, the pencil "forgets itself to you." ¡El lápiz se me olvidó!

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Great post, shitty subject matter.

I LQTMS'ed several times.

Have a nice weekend,


PotbellyJoe said...

I was pretty damn pissed at the smear campaign.

It was low, even for the Post. And that's pretty low.

I'd lament the lack of journalistic integrity, but that's just beating a dead cyclist. The Post is run by a man who tapped phones of rivals and marks all while having writers (they're not journalists) piss and whine about the NSA's cell phone program.

I hope they all have to go to the penalty box for two minutes by themselves and feel shame.

But that would require a shred of decency, which we've already shown the lack of which is a prerequisite of being hired by the Murdochs' muckraker union.

Unknown said...

"Dude, you gotta take a chill pill!"

That is covered in paragraph 145.

right_arm_robot said...

Facts, facts, facts. Who needs em!

Message #1: Automobiles rule. Kill people walking or cycling? No problem. It's their fault for not having a car.
Message #2: Do nothing to change rule #1.

Anonymous said...

vsk said ...

Our Snobby's on FIYAAAAA !!

Well said all around. I read about this crap all snow piled winter long. Then I wonder why I am not anxious to get back in the swing come the marginal fender weather. Suddenly there's a Gran Fondon't and I am huffing + puffing whilst The Pack is talking easily about restaurants and tire pressure.

It's enough to get road rage at the desk reading all this. Would love to post comments all over their places but I'd just sound like rambling noise to the anti-bike crowd. I'll save my rambling noise for here.

Be safe folks,


Freddy Murcks said...

It would all be okay if NYC would just build a giant vagina sports stadium. Perhaps they could pair it with a giant penis stadium.

Anonymous said...

Babs, i love you and your blog, but i have got to point out that cars, guns, and even office staplers are all TOOLS. all three can be useful and all three only become "weapons" when they are intentionally used to do harm to someone else. If i am in the wilderness and must hunt to survive, a loaded gun is now a tool. If someone needs rushed to the hospital, my car is a tool to transport that person. If i bludgeon my coworker with a swingline, the stapler is a weapon. The problem is that no one is held accountable and no one takes responsibility. Their INTENT is the clarifying factor.

1983 David Byrne regarding automobile bias said...

I don't know what you expect, staring into the TV set

3G said...

Dammit there is no comments section on the NYP.

dop said...

I had some wicked stapler fights in the mobile home factory...the rosin-tipped 2 inch staples for stapling the deck to the frame...still have a scar on my left arm and that was 1974

PotbellyJoe said...

@Freddy Murcks

If other NY sports venues are any indication, they won't have a problem filling a new stadium with a bunch of dicks.

nscadu 9 said...

posts like this keep reminding me of the quote from an earlier post stating cities get the cyclists, they deserve and drivers they deserve for that matter. If drivers are absolved they have no fear of repercussions for their bad habits or bad intentions, meanwhile cyclist with little infrastructure ignore traffic signals and rules of the road simply for their own safety. On a far more minor interaction, I got stopped by by-law the other day for a warning about riding on the sidewalk on my way to the bike rack. I even entered the sidewalk on a lowered driveway lip that leads to a municipal parkade. At least, no ticket.

David Pearce said...


I'm swallowing now (the chill pill, I mean...).

Yes, we know that depression is often of purely genetic origin. We are referring here to those cases in which environment plays the predominant role.

I regret the necessity that I must assess you several minus points for continually using the the pronoun "we", when everyone knows, from the postman on down, it's just you, dude. Not we. Just you.

Also, stop being so cryptic.

Dave said...

Once again a hearty thank-you to Ted K. for curing my insomnia. But you know -

you know you got to get going
out of the door
and down to the street all alone

Two amusing riders spotted today on the W&OD:

An old man, pot-belly, nice road bike, white hair, wobbling along, puffing on an enormous stogie, wearing old-school big-ass headphones. God bless you, P.J. O'Rourke! (I know - PJ wouldn't be caught dead on a bike.)

And the tiniest child I'd ever seen without training wheels, wobbling along with his mom pushing a stroller. If the kid was three he was short for his age.

So that's America - anybody can ride. And get crushed doing it.

PotbellyJoe said...

The NY Post writer is a master baiter.

Milton said...

I was told I could keep my red stapler.

Anonymous said...

I know that the “Commentariat” is completely open to anyone, but this is, after all, a cycling community. Why doesn’t this “Ted K.” just…go away? (Fred Mercury had a VERY good idea for Ted K.: "get your own blog, asshole." )

David Pearce said...

And another thing, T.K.!

It's either "leftish" OR "leftist".

Your usage of both terms might induce others to think you might be suffering from a mental imbalance of some sort.

There is no chaos theory in the English language.

Leftish or leftist, not both.

Pick won.

Dottie's Co-Worker said...

Altoona, slowly I turned, step by step...

babble on said...

Anon @ 2:00 - Thank you kindly. I appreciate that. But it isn't just a question of intent, is it? It is also a question of rational thought, and of assuming responsibility for one's actions. And I'm sorry, but with all due respect, you are defending the very issue which is at the heart of this post. The drivers who speed, slam into and kill pedestrians are never charged, because despite understanding the potential consequences of their actions, they weren't speeding with the premeditated intent of killing someone. That is the reason that the police always refuse to lay charges, instead insisting that there's "no criminality suspected," even though speeding and distracted drivers do what they do with full understanding of the danger of their actions. So does someone who accidentally kills someone with the gun they are carelessly waving around deserve to be charged with homicide even though they had no intention of murder, or it supposed to be a shrug, and "Oh well, he didn't mean to shoot that kid, so let's just let him go." ???

Maple Syrup Needed ASAP said...

Humor going south on this blog. Bring back Commie Canuck.

David Pearce said...

@ 3:08 PM -- "Hear, hear!"

Spokey said...

wow lots of ted vitriol today.

i dunno. i just scroll past.

twas a loverly day in the neighborhood today. temps near perfect around noon although although by 1430 it was hot enough for a bit of sweat. couldn't go down 202 today as they're working on the shoulder. so i turned on old york. should closed on 205 along dukes too. don't tell the guy who will run me over that i rode on something in that section that might be a sidewalk.

is that an old babs pic? seems like i saw that one a long time ago.

ride well & safe this weekend peeps

BC said...

I remember once as a new crime reporter typing accident when I meant crash, and got such a lengthy lecture that I never dared type the word "accident" again. It's a little surprising someone working at a paper the size and level of the NY Times wouldn't know that, and that an editor there wouldn't have caught that. Sheesh.

Spokey said...

oh and i haven't studied so i'm damn glad there's not exam this week. did a real wheel suck on the last one.

babble on said...

D'you mean the new profile pic? Nope, it's not old, unless a week or two counts as old. But I have taken a few selfies over the years, so surely it looks familiar.

I miss Commie, too. Wonder where he is these days... But made me laugh.

David Pearce said...

Here's another clue for you all. The Wa--. Wait a minute, that's a different clue.

Metropolitan Diary

Overheard on the A Train going downtown this morning:

--"So I go, 'You can pick your nose. And you can pick your friends. But you can't pick you friend's nose!'"

--"So what happened?"

--"Pick won!"

Anonymous said...

As a NYer I can say that 90% of us run around with our heads up our asses, rushing to get to work or some other appointment which at the end of the day makes no difference if we are a couple of minutes late too. Whether you are walking, riding, in a cab or driving it is the same thoughtless mentality, we are rushing around like fucking ants oblivious of everyone around us because we all think our lives are so fucking important. To put your relative insignificance into perspective, There are roughly 8 million people in NYC. The average person life consists of 700,000 hours. The population of NYC lives your entire life in the span of about 2 hours, the time spent watching a movie. So next time you are selfishly and dangerously rushing around to say not be 2 minutes late meeting a friend for coffee, try to put it into perspective. In the grand scheme your entire existence is almost entirely irrelevant and those 2 minutes mean less than nothing. Have a nice weekend!

Anonymous said...


ken e. said...

need some big complementary words, stat.



leroy said...

Ride safe all.

As for the rest of it, fuck 'em.

A life well lived is the best revenge.

Spokey said...

yeah, not surprised. you've had a few selfies in your time. and you must like that white dress. looks nice.

anon @1529

there is some point to rushing around. i've been dicking around all season just enjoying myself. as a result, i can't do any distance and am still struggling up minor hills. or at least too lazy to put effort in to those hills.

my life is significant to me though. and hopefully to spousy, crumb crunchers, crumb crunchers 2.0, lil sis, etc. but i do see your point. screw the 8 million nyc population. except for snobbie, vsk, and the other nyc commentariat (dop? jlrb?)

Anonymous said...

upshot: remove your head from your ass. Be considerate of others (as if they were you). Think before you do. May your god smile upon you. may your life be full of blowies.

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure what it is but every time you post a picture of that old woman (what's her name again) I swear I can smell the faint odor of moth balls and cat food?

grog said...

Let me go.
Bismillah, we will not let you go.
Let me go.
Bismillah, we will not let you go.
Let me go.

babble on said...

Thanks. And yep, the dress is rather old and well worn. It has long been a fav. And what did Kim K call her selfie book? Self-ish? Pretty much says it all... :)

Anonymous said...

I think you're describing negligence. Yes, twirling a loaded gun around your finger and driving while staring at the smart phone are both irresponsible and negligent. Hey, I'm on your side. But if cyclists are ever going to be taken seriously then we can not fall into the trap of extremism and knee-jerk reactions. Each case must be analyzed objectively. No, we cant say if a driver INTENTIONALLY struck a bike/ped, or if their foot really did slip off the brake. But we also cannot logically assume (which would be an oxymoron) either way. We must do our best to make an informed decision on a case by case basis and if we can get the PD to take us seriously and apply some forensics, maybe that would happen.

My point here is just like "they" say "the cyclist must be at fault. Serves them right" as a default statement, "we" cant just automatically say "the driver of that car killed someone so they're a murderer." What i'm defending here is logic and reason. People who operate dangerous machinery (like a car, or bicycle) which could potentially harm others or themselves must do so responsibly and take responsibility for their actions after the fact, and THAT is the root of the issue.

rwaiyy feenyay said...

Roille Figners payin' a visit. Ironically coming back to find that the SAME GUY being talked about when I tuned out, is still being talked about today. Nothing changes I tell ya. Including getting embroiled with that piece-of-shit the Post, which was what pissed me off last time. Good job Snobz giving them what for, but really, aside from the housekeeping chore of making corrections, who really gives a shit what a liar says? After the first lie you're like "Oh here comes that liar again, what kind of lie will it be this time?" Who gets their news from anywhere but reddit/digg/etc anymore anyway? The Post is like an emaciated and dying woolly mammoth having its final apoplectic ragey freak-out. Which is why it resonates so well with a certain segment of automotive America also having its f.a.r.f.-o.

Whoever above said it's a matter of intent, I would say that is why they invented Involuntary Manslaughter as a charge, and that's the charge people who run people over, deserve to be charged with, assuming prosecutors can't prove they intended to do it. Running from a cop maybe doesn't prove it per se, but it does aggravate it, which is why they invented Aggravated crimes. Well anyway, bye again.

JLRB said...

Oh sure - spread that angry shit around for us to read right before the weekend, instead of providing us with boobies 'n stuff. That is blue Monday material. But right on - it all blows. The asshead reporter caught a guy on a bike doing a better stop than most every other bike/car/certainly bus out there and shames him for it.


(Welcome back Roille)

(Babs - thanks for the link to the FIFA bit - Oliver Rocks)

babble on said...

Welcome back, Roille Figners! You missed the perfect return post by a mere three days, but you hit upon a good week for it. And good point. Why do you suppose drivers are never charged?

You see, that's the thing. While you regularly see involuntary manslaughter charges available for people who are negligent with their firearm-tool-weapons, there is absolutely no equivalent charging of drivers who are negligent with their automotive-tool-weapons. And given that a million people a year die because of what is indeed criminal behaviour, maybe it's time somebody's knee did a little jerking in the way of the general population's pants yabbies. I'm totally good with any sort of criminal charges being laid against people who choose to drive their tools in a manner which turns them into weapons, most especially when those tools-cum-weapons maim and kill other people. But it isn't happening, and without a reaction of some sort, it isn't about to any time soon, either, especially so long as we the people allow the media and press at large to continue unabated with their cycling witch hunt.

Anonymous said...

Posters with autographs have been found. I will professionally package them in a round mailing tube and send them to you next week. Please send email or address and I'll get in touch.
Otherwise, I send to Kenny.

Comment deleted said...

Ro-yay, hey, hey. Things have been the poorer around here for your absence, with the exception of Babs' profile pic.

Anonymous said...


recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

"Otherwise, I send to Kenny."

-Good one DB!

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

I don't get the Ted K hate either.

One day we'll look back and reminisce Ted's quaint postings. The ass-monkeys had quite a run spanking their way to the podium on a daily basis and didn't seem to strike up the ire like old Teddy.

Spokey said...

Ass Monkey ! ? ?

As a commentariat yeller recipient, pleeeeeze. Ass Bonobo

Anonymous said...

That's not the *real* Rollie Fingers. That Dude had a different writing style in that it included intelligent remarks.

crosspalms said...

Nice to hear from Roille again, and yeah, intent matters but drivers need to be held responsible for "accidents" where people get hurt or killed. I'm sure the guys in the Mercedes didn't intend to hit the professor and kill him, but they hit him and killed him.

Altoona. Home of the tart with the nail. (Probably not their motto.)

Anonymous said...

"accidents" happen in toddler pants

Anonymous said...

vsk said ...
Comment Deleted has not deleted any comments lately. Unless I missed them because they were uh, not there any more!!

I'm going to the Transportation Alternatives Bike Home From Work Party at the Brooklyn base of the Manhattan Bridge.

I'll be the noncompetitive looking guy on the green+white Olmo Competition.


Anonymous said...

You folks be careful biking this weekend.
We've had a month long tornado warning, so not much biking recently.


Figners! Good to know you're out there.

Now, if BGW would make an appearance, then it'd be PAR-TAY!

BamaPhred, waterlogged edition said...

Figners! Please come back! That little incident behind..., well, never mind. Just come back and post again. Man this car stuff is depressing. I don't keep up with the outcomes but in Alabama there are charges pressed against drivers (and weapon owners) who negligently kill, maim, injure, people and destroy property. Especially the hit and runs that get caught. They even arrested old IMARUNEMINNADEECTH just because, and made him attend anger management, I hear. Maybe they get off later, I don't know.

Anonymous said...

Isn't Alabama the state refusing to recognize gay marriage Supreme Court rulings ? Good to know you all aren't all racist homophobes or isn't a?

Freddy Murcks said...

Snob - today's post was quite inciteful. By which I mean that my hands may be incited to go pull some motherfucker out of the diver's seat of the car that is whisking him around, and my shoes may be incited to kick the motherfucker's teeth in.

Anonymous said...


What the f*** is wrong with people? Is there any hope? Nevermind, I already know the answer. I'll go back to riding my bike in the woods now.

Arizona hillbilly said...

Their intent and due caution. Or lack of it. Reckless endangerment is criminal behavior.

dop said...

I had another problem with that headline. I thought a bicyclist had been killed by a car, while the cyclist was fleeing the court police.

dop said...

That is to say, that a bicyclist was killed by a car, while he was fleeing from court police

dop said...

not exactly, "eats shoots and leaves", but what the hey

Anonymous said...

I've lost faith in humanity.

Anonymous said...

Your always holding on to stars...

JLRB said...


dop said...


dop said...


dop said...


there's a reason I don't write headlines..

dop said...

classic headlines:




Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

Below, from NYS Veh and traffic law

To summarize my interpretation of the legalese bullshit, causing physical injury of a cyclist or pedestrian can result in penalties of 500.00 or 15 days incarceration; SERIOUS injury can result in penalty of up to 750.00 and 15 days in jail; A repeat offense in 5 years can result in penalties up to 1000.00 and they may heap on other draconian punishments, such as commu ity service.

Don't sweat it, the great state of NY has us protected.

b) 1. A driver of a motor vehicle who causes physical injury as defined in article ten of the penal law to a pedestrian or bicyclist while failing to exercise due care in violation of subdivision (a) of this section, shall be guilty of a traffic infraction punishable by a fine of not more than five hundred dollars or by imprisonment for not more than fifteen days or by both such fine and imprisonment.2. If such driver of a motor vehicle causes physical injury while failing to exercise due care in violation of subdivision (a) of this section, then there shall be a rebuttable presumption that, as a result of such failure to exercise due care, such person operated the motor vehicle in a manner that caused such physical injury.(c) 1. A driver of a motor vehicle who causes serious physical injury as defined in article ten of the penal law to a pedestrian or bicyclist while failing to exercise due care in violation of subdivision (a) of this section, shall be guilty of a traffic infraction punishable by a fine of not more than seven hundred fifty dollars or by imprisonment for not more than fifteen days or by required participation in a motor vehicle accident prevention course pursuant to paragraph (e-1) of subdivision two of section 65.10 of the penal law or by any combination of such fine, imprisonment or course, and by suspension of a license or registration pursuant to subparagraph (xiv) or (xv) of paragraph b of subdivision two of section five hundred ten of this chapter2. If such driver of a motor vehicle causes serious physical injury while failing to exercise due care in violation of subdivision (a) of this section, then there shall be a rebuttable presumption that, as a result of such failure to exercise due care, such person operated the motor vehicle in a manner that caused such serious physical injury.(d) A violation of subdivision (b) or (c) of this section committed by a person who has previously been convicted of any violation of such subdivisions within the preceding five years, shall constitute a class B misdemeanor punishable by a fine of not more than one thousand dollars in addition to any other penalties provided by law.(e) Nothing contained in this section shall prevent the court from imposing any other authorized disposition, including a period of community service.§

oh yeah said...

oh yeah

Dooth said...

I was thisclose to having my name published in the NY Post in a story which was totally fabricated by some crazy rich person who's "out to get me." It was a front page story. As a matter of due diligence a Post editor called me to fact check. This editor was whip smart. My named was not published, saving me from a heap of trouble.
Hate on the Post all you want, but they know their business.

BamaPhred said...

Fuck. Run Silk Road, life in prison, no chance of parole, forfeit millions. Kill people in NYC in the middle of the street, anytime day or night, witnesses everywhere, it's move along, nothing to see here, no criminality. Rus shoulda dealt weed outta da back of his car. He'd be a free man today. I suppose he cut the wrong people out of his deal. The cartels and governments don't want anybody on their turf.
It rains every afternoon, just like a monsoon. So I took off at daylight and stayed dry. Nature can be a real mother.
Take your filthy robot paws off me, recaptcha

Hank Ford, Sr. said...

I will build a motor car for the great horde of unwashed heathens...constructed of the best materials available from foreign lands, built by non-unionized peasants working for slave wages, using the best slickster gimmickry that modern marketing can low in price that no beer-swilling moron willing to take out a high-interest loan for 72 months will be unable to own one-and thereby spread his profound ignorance, basic contempt for all other modes of transport, and general twat-baggery all over God's great open spaces (and lots of over-fucking crowded ones as well). Oh yeah...and, if a fucking bicyclist gets in the way, he can squash it like a bug.

Anonymous said...

Did you post these inferior comments here by mistake? Because they have no relevance to this particular post. Although, they have convinced me that mental illness and low IQ are for real.

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

It hasn't been revealed if John Kerry Was wearing a helmet or not.

dop said...


Anonymous said...

the article i read about John Kerry's "accident" said that "...the bike hit the curb, causing the accident..."
so at least it wasn't his fault.

Spokey said...

distracted bike-sickening by mr heinz

other tweets at the time indicate he was busy in intense negotiations. having trouble with visualizing the ayatollah and john together going down the street on their bieks.

btw just found out that if you are a robot, just lie and you can post anywho.

BamaPhred said...

At 71 I'm not making fun of Mr Heinz, just having some cheap sport at his expense. A helicopter ride for a broken leg? Resting comfortably on his private jet? Seriously? I suppose the worst part was telling Terese he broke his bike. Vat, ze new one I bought you 20 years ago? I break ze other leg when you land.
I can empathize.
Get your filthy robot killing paws off me recaptcha. .

Spokey said...

when I hurt my leg a couple years back no helicopter for me! abandoned the ride at only the 18 mile point i think. my brother drove me in his '97 toyota. but then again i was only around 60. he did stop so i could ease my pain with a slurpee but did make me hop in to the liquor store on the way back to my house.

don't let robot in. i just found out it killed dr lanning.

Anonymous said...

Watch out for falling cranes around Grand Central.
Oh! And cars, taxis and pedestrians.

dop said...

Little old lady mutilated late last night......robots of London again

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

Article stated Kerry's accident happened at a flat section in the Col de Galibiere (sp?). I wonder how he would have handled the downhill??

Spokey said...

forget the downhill. how would he handle those little rotaries we see on le tour de france?

JLRB said...

DO helments cause male pattern baldness?

Captain America said...

The Kerry is a HERO and PATRIOT. Shame be on all you who dare to mock his misfortune.

Anonymous said...

Nice rant on the NY Post pursuit of new lows in reporting.

leroy said...

JLRB @9:27 pm--

My dog asked me to tell you "no; worms."

I told him he could be worm free with a semi-colon removal.

He said something I can't repeat.

dop said...

If you remove his semicolon, he'll alert you to his claws in other ways (sorry...homophonic humor is un-pc...unless your pc has a broken semicolon)

Mcfly said...

Naked Paris Woman Arrested

Paris, Tenn. - A report at the Paris Police Department stated that Cpl. Jerayme Whitaker responded to a call on Forrest Heights Road of a nude female running in a yard.

Upon arrival, Cpl. [redacted] observed the nude woman wrestling with a probation officer in the front yard of a residence.

Cpl. Whitaker detained her, and found clothing to cover her body. Cpl. Whitaker detected a strong odor of alcohol. The female was belligerent, combative, had blood shot eyes and poor balance.

The woman, identified as Teresa L. Conley, age 48, of 1200 Palestine Road, for her safety, was taken into custody and charged with public intoxication.

*It is worth noting that officers reported that her pantied flee'd the scene.

McFly said...


Spokey said...

seems pretty oblivious to me. she was taking an alcohol bath.

nice going french gestapo. go after some poor woman who is just trying to clean herself up.

Anonymous said...

vsk said ...

Bike Home from Work Party at the Manhattan Bridge was nice. Renewed my TransAlt membership.

Super windy Saturday.

John Kerry flew back to the U.S. to escape the rationed Euro health care. 3 months to wait for an emergency X-ray. That is provided he was deemed young enough to make it through the Swiss Death Panel.


BamaPhred said...

Arresting a drunk, belligerent, woman is the classic lose-lose situation.

JLRB said...

Leroy -

Your post reminda me of this old SNL skit

Anonymous said...

Darth Vader is promoting bike helmets in Germany.. You know the villian; who always wore his helmet; even in the shower presumably. Kind of modeled after Nazi helmets. Some Germans are altering the billboards, more laughs at copenhagenize.

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Unknown said...

Sooner or later a bicyclist actually will be killed by a car. I bicycle to work in Chandler, Arizona and have to dodge Mr MaGoogle's self-driving cars which favor safe streets with bike lanes so that they can prove how safe they are.

None of the accidents they get into are their fault. #NotOurFault.

Star said...
This comment has been removed by the author.