Friday, July 27, 2012

BSNYC Friday Fun Quiz!

When you think of cycling in New York City, you think of David Byrne (who doesn't own a car), and valet bike parking at Wilco concerts in Prospect Park, and left-leaning young people with crooked Bern helmets and "muffin tops" riding Urban Outfitters bikes to jobs in graphic design.  Meanwhile, when you think of cycling in the American South, you think of getting run off the road by people in pick-up trucks, getting attacked by beagles on dirt roads, and being chased away from moonshine stills by blunderbuss-wielding bootleggers.

Well, stereotypes are dangerous, because nothing could be further from the truth.  Firstly, artisanal bootlegging is currently the hottest thing going in Brooklyn, pickup trucks are the new fixie, and blunderbusses are the new iPhone.  Secondly, meet William "Billy" Carrington, Kentucky's foremost bicycle advocate:



I fell asleep about a minute and a half in, but I gather he wants you to ride a bike.  Also, would it kill you to pick up the phone and call someone once in awhile?



I'll spare you his talk on the Olympics, but it may not surprise you to learn he's rooting for the USA.

Speaking of misconceptions, there are people who dismiss Rapha as a purveyor of overpriced cycling accessories, but the fact is they have many satisfied customers, such as this one who took the time to email me recently:


youre always ragging on Rapha chamois cream...i got some and now my nuts smell amazing

Presumably he either found someone willing to smell his "pants yabbies" for him, or else he's extremely flexible.  Either way, I'll take his word for it.


And now, I'm pleased to present you with a quiz.  As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer.  If you're right you'll crow like the Dorking cockerel, and if you're wrong you'll see Belgians.


Thanks very much for reading, ride safe this weekend, and for Lob's sake would you just take the time to pick up the phone and call someone?  Sheesh.




--Wildcat Rock Machine







1) According to Yahoo!, the 2012 Tour de France was won by Stanley Wiggins.

--True
--False






2) The 2012 Olympic road course does not visit which of the following?

--Box Hill
--Leatherhead
--Dorking
--Gropecunt Lane








("Do these glasses make me look smart?")

3) Mark Cavendish says his "biggest extravagance" is:

--His six cars
--His forty-seven motorcycles
--His billiard room decorated by fashion designer Paul Smith
--Peta Todd's upper half







(Cycling commentator Phil Liggett selects a baby kangaroo for roasting.)

4) Phil Liggett believes that including mountain biking and BMX in the Olympics is:

--"Smart"
--"Fun"
--"A welcome opportunity for a new generation of athletes"
--"Absolutely disgraceful"






5) According to Nashbar, the Opera Super Leonardo will have you:

--"jumping for joy"
--"giggling like a schoolgirl"
--"singing in a falsetto"
--"cradling your 'pants yabbies' in agony"








6) The long-awaited New York City bike share system will debut:

--Next week
--Next month
--Next year
--???








7) An Australian cyclist who was arrested for drunk cycling because he was "swerving along Bower Rd and struggling to maintain control of his bike" turned out simply to be a sober triathlete on a training ride.

--True
--False



***Special USA-Themed Bonus Question***

(Team USA will leave the competition in their helmet mirrors at this year's Olympic Games.)

In celebration of American Fred-dom, the USA men's Olympic cycling team will wear the above jersey with a pair of half-shorts.

--True
--False



121 comments:

wishiwasmerckx said...

First!

kindof abigdeal said...

Dorking!!!

wishiwasmerckx said...

Won't hog the podium, he says...bad form to do so, he says...

JB said...

No podium :(

JB said...

All doped up, too.

Mike in Dallas said...

Stellaaa!!! I mean, PETAAAAAAAA!!!

Ed said...

Top Ten

Anonymous said...

cunt

Alchemist said...

TOP TEN RADIO FLYER TONIGHT

N Mnan said...

Tnop Tnen Ynou Cnuntz!!!!

N Mnan said...

By the way, congrats to Wnishiwnasmnerckx on his Fnirst Plnace Wnin. Chnapeau!

singlespeedwaster said...

Some of us up here in the top ten plus have work to ditch to attend to this

Marcel Da Chump said...

But Liggett does support adding Alleycat races to the Olympics.

Anonymous said...

Damn......15th three days inna row....

g-roc said...

Snob, 3 things:

1. Us non-NYCers have that stereotype of NYC bicycle cycling only because of you.
2.You said the O word. I'm surprised your Blogger account hasn't been shut down yet.
3. The Man Missle has 6 more cars than Mr Byrne? Lets see, one for him, one for his kid, one for Peta's kid, one for Peta, one each for Peta's accoutrements. Yeah, that adds up.

McFly said...

Mark Hipsterdish

JB said...

I'd think I needed glasses too, if I had those things in my face all the time.

ashcroftchops said...

Foldingcuntbike advocate

Anonymous said...

Pull me!

crosspalms said...

I'm torn between the wine-and-cheese mobile and the frites mobile. They're both awesome. And now I'm hungry.

Anonymous said...

Liggett laments the removal of the kilo? Where the f--k did they put it and how do I get there and what time are we leaving?

Anonymous said...

What the hell is the matter with all you Fred's....this was just posted and already 19 posts...Jesus, get a life ...and that goes for snobby as well.

20th from Japan

Fred Nifacent said...

no mayo on those frittes and nary a waffle to be had. are you sure this was France's toupe, or was it perhaps portland?

Justaprole said...

I must have that American flag/Dog jersey. It's spectacular. Please tell me where I can purchase such an item. I did not know that such a thing existed before reading this post, but now my life seems empty without it. Please help me acheive my life's goal (as of 20 seconds ago).

Jimboner said...

In Florida. My balls smell like crabs.

Old Norseman said...

kunta!

Anonymous said...

What are "half shorts"?

What I'm picturing wouldn't stay on unless you used double sided tape.

Belgian meat helment salesman said...

So nice to have a glimpse of my countrymen back home in the gourmet parade. Hey I think thats my nephew Guillaume in the wine-and-cheese mobile.

Anonymous said...

more crotchal splendor or ima fking krillyou

Buffalo Bill said...

mmmm... delicious roasted joey. Don't forget the horseradish!

le Correcteur said...

"Presumably he either found someone willing to smell his "pants yabbies" for him, or else he's extremely flexible. Either way, I'll take his word for it."

Gems like this keep me coming back, WRM.

Anonymous said...

Does that jersey really exist? Jeez....

What's wrong with black?

hey nonny mouse

JB said...

Anon @ 12:10pm: It was posted at 11:38am. That's 19 comments in 32 minutes. Plust, with the time difference in Japan, you get like a 20-hour head start. Face it, you're slow, with our without the doping.

Anonymous said...

As a Kentuckian myself, I would like to apologize to everybody for Billy Carrington (and Mitch McConnell too.)

Anonymous said...

Oh, and Rand Paul, also.

Anonymous said...

I rode in the south. Those ain't stereotypes. Nothing like being pelted by beer cans while on a ride.

cycle

McFly said...

Everyone one knows you can stick your entire hand down your pants, fondle yourself for 3-5 seconds(any longer and you will be Fofonov) and remove and do an immdeiate tell-smell of the palm to know if you are ripe.

Captain Hardbread said...

muffin tops and meat panties

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Epic quiz today. The blog post coulda used a picture of Peta or at least recumbabe though.

Anonymous said...

sounds like Everett Bogue has found work in the marketitng department of Rapha. Who else could sniff their own scranus and report on the pleasant smell of Rapha chamois cream

Name said...

Is Mark Cavendish a pretentious twat or what?

Tuscany, Morgans hotels done up by Philippe Starck, buying Nike trainers in Harrods at Five, One Hyde Park, Mclaren sports car...

At least Stanley likes mod hair and old Lambrettas.

mikeweb said...

Those two fake monks with the giant fake bottles of Trappist ale looked extremely non-plussed.

bikesgonewild said...

...i used to be in a ska band called the dork-kings with mick cavendish & stanley wiggins...

...no, you didn't ask but i'm just sayin'...

Dooth said...

Figaro
Fiigaaro
Fiiigaaaro
Figaro
Figaro
Fiiiigaaaaroooo

That's what happens you go
for a ride on the Opera.

bikesgonewild said...

...i used to work in a chinese takeaway (take out) called the wok-king with paul weller...

...the guy was always in a jam...

Dooth said...

The Paul Weller I knew was a sharp dresser, like he was on a style council or something...

babble on said...

Further to a few posts:

1)You said "you probably don't want to go stepping directly on the clit." But the truth is if you want to get there sometimes you have to stomp on it a little at the end of your ride.

2)Dope is for dopes. Except in Vancouver where it will be soon be mandatory.

3)Cheers for sharing today's video clips, Snobby-poo.I never expected to see the likes of Billy on this side of the line in the sand...

Who knows? Maybe it will be a fat suit from Kentucky who finally declares war on cars for real.

Giddyup.

g-roc said...

I guess if you can afford high priced taintal cream, you can afford to spread some extra on your pants yabbies too. The life of a Serotta rider - daisy fresh pants yabbies.

Jed said...

Cipo'z ballz smell like cuntz

Jed said...

Getting into the groove.

Anonymous said...

I've lived in the south my entire life and have never once been chased by a beagle. A chihuahua in a camouflage t-shirt and rhinestone studded collar, yes; beagles, no.

bikesgonewild said...

...speaking of 'style council'...

...team usa jersey has one big puppy ON the front...

...team peta todd jersey has two big puppies IN the front...

Cav said...

i may be a tard, but i am still awesome.

All The Black People In Portland said...

bikeshare = nyc public toilets for the Citi-sponsored smug set...

Snob, do you remember where there WAS one public toilet, on City Hall Plaza just off the Brooklyn Bridge.

Sorta big circular kiosk, maybe cost a dollar to get in? Not that I had this issue but it 'timed out' also at some point to prevent tantric or just fucking languid sexual encounters.

And hey, fuck bikeshare, when will all the parkland destroyed by the new Yankee stadium be replaced as promised?

Cipo said...

eating pussy

Mark Man Missle Cunt Destroyer said...

Ligget is a retard too. Timed track events are the dullest shit on this planet. I say good riddance to the pretentious shit, BMX is where its at. Just ask that cunt wiggo.

John Peel said...

So if Bradley = Paul Weller, Cav = ?
Noel Gallagher perhaps?

Anonymous said...

Read the Mark Cavendish piece.

I will never watch professional cycling again.

BikeSnobNYC said...

All the Black People in Portland,

Not only do I remember it but I used it once and it was so big I was able to fit my bicycle in there with me.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

McFly said...

Speaking of Bike Share programs I was in Chattanooga Sunday and they have one now and there was not a bike to be shared anywhere. That town is kind of Colorado'ish and those drifters/hippys were zoomin around on those flo green bitches like it was Christmas Morning. There are probably bikes all over north Georgia and up through the Appalacians by............wait for it..........now.

Anonymous said...

Billy Carrington: My new hero. Goodbye Wildcat.

Quilled and Lugged said...

Anon @ 3:41 said
Read the Mark Cavendish piece.
I will never watch professional cycling again.

Wait, have you never heard of Filippo Pozzato?

Anonymous said...

GIS Sammy Brady.

You're welcome.

balls®

acquiesce808 said...

Ligget all hating up on BMX/Mountain Biking really chamfers my brooks. but, then again, that's why BMX and Mountain Biking were invented... to piss off old people.

bikesgonewild said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
bikesgonewild said...

...@ john peel...

...nah...but noel gallagher = every self entitled, whiny, pretentious cat1 cyclist who thinks he's hot shit but couldn't hold cavendish's wheel or carry his jock if his life depended on it...

...gallaghers attitude X the music he's made = really, dude ???...

db said...

I was ready to be pissed at Liggett for bagging on MTB and BMX, but when I read his full comments, he wasn't really railing against them. He was harshing on removing the track events and then subbing the newer disciplines.

I like MTB and BMX, but the Olympic variety really strains to resemble those disciplines, IMO. So I'm inclined to agree with Phil, to a degree.

You've seen the UK Olympic course for MTB, right? Is that what you ride on?

PS: Photos of triathletes on bikes never get old.

Anonymous said...

Does Rapha make scented candles?

Anonymous said...

Clean sweep on the quiz - first time ever.
And as if that was not enough, I followed the wikipedia links and brushed up on the history of cunt.
So I got that going for me.
Which is nice.

Salty and Sore said...

I could just picture this one...

(W4M/M4M). Rapha chamois cream users preferred. Bike not required.

ce said...

They should change the name of the Olympics to the 'Xlympics'. That would be radical to the max!

Anonymous said...

I've been sufficiently brainwashed by this blog that I fell for question 7. Well played, WRM.

(Meanwhile, nine days until my next tri. Better start drinking now. Wish me luck, assholes.)

ce said...

Yesterday I was watching a snarky video comparing the cinematic quality of the light sabre fight scenes from the original Star Wars movies to those in the prequels. Anyway, whenever Luke Skywalker's face was shown I noticed something strange, but couldn't place my finger on it at first. Eventually it occurred to me - Luke Skywalker is Cadel Evans' great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, etc... grandson!

Can't see it? Okay never mind.

Anonymous said...

Why couldn't question 7 have been true? Why? Is there no Lob?

John Peel said...

@bgw - a shrewd appraisal of Noel Gallagher's actual talent. Fair play. I was going largely on swarthiness.
So Cav = who, then?

Anonymous said...

On an olympic kick; it would appear to be getting a bit heavy-handed already....

http://www.itv.com/news/story/2012-07-27/arrests-after-critical-mass-cycle-ride-in-london-near-olympic-stadium-stratdford-and-waterloo-bridge/

hey nonny mouse

3G said...

Looks like my unborn child has a name finally!

Gropecunt Dorking Vanvulvastein

El Bonkador said...

I had no plan to serialize this but here we are...

The names have been changed to reflect WRM's in depth reporting and my 27 year love affair with "Blame it on Rio".

Stanley Wiggins: My testicles have no nose.

Michael Caine: How do they smell?

Stanley Wiggins: EPIC!

Anonymous said...

Just in case anyone missed this. Great old documentary on how a bike was made, but I think many of the processes are still similar:

http://vimeo.com/39401575

McFly said...

Opening Ceremonies? Dafuq did I just watch?

Anonymous said...

Yeah Stanley!

leroy said...

My dog wants one of those dove bicycles from the Olympics opening.

No way.

I mean can you imagine having to clean up after one of those?

Ride safe all!

Raph said...

Was it epic - I couldn't find any dodgy feeds to watch online, and I wasn't going to wait for NBC to show it.

bikesgonewild said...

...@ mr peel...i, sir, am a fan of the todd thumper, so i shan't assign any degradation, humorous or not, to the young manxman...

...as i write this, the olympic road race is only hours away & whilst the odds are stacked against him, i should be delighted to awake in the morn to read that the world champion, delilah's daddy, is also an olympic champion...

McFly said...

BGW,
That would be pretty sweet for we would get gratuitous shots of the Petanator over the course of the next 4 years.

bikesgonewild said...

...hey, nonny mouse...dunno your take on the london critical mass on friday night but to me, those cunts are the fucking epitomy of clueless idiocy...

...anyone thinking that a positive point of any kind regarding cycling (or anything, for that matter) might come about through disruption of both a major showcase event & a major security concern needs serious help for being stupid & delusional...

...now, wiggo, well ol' wiggo came out to '...bang a gong..." at the opening ceremony & as great britain's first yellow jersey winner, that wanker was well accepted as a cyclist, ya ???......

wishiwasmerckx said...

BGW, did you just shant your pants?

Jasper said...

I kind of feel the Critical Mass is like Burning Man - it was a good idea in the beginning, and it should have been knocked on the head after a few years. I don't know that it serves any purpose now.
Nice to see some old stomping grounds during the road race, and can we deny old Vino a final hurrah?

Fred said...

"Well, stereotypes are dangerous, because nothing could be further from the truth." Hmmm... In texas we carry our muzzle loader's on our bikes and drink moonshine in the park after every ride. Sometimes we even get a large soda!

Cipo said...

My new 'Vulva' flavoured Great White Shark testoterone/Tasmainian Devil adrenaline super energy drink will allow you to perform at levels you have only imagined. Ask for 'Cipo's Cunt Juice*' by name at finer bike shops everywhere.

*completely UCI compliant. No need to worry about being banned from club level rides.

Anonymous said...

I must have another look at it in the cold light of sobriety!

I think that Critical Masses are.... unhelpful.
I've been on one; hated the experience. Had a bus with a grumpy driver sitting behind me, most of the other participants were student-a-like on crap 70s bikes. I took the first possible opportunity to move away, apologised to the bus driver, and went back to fast filtering!
However, I also think that the Polis have a bit of a licence to, er, "act in the interests of national security" at the moment.

To sum up; they're probably all twats, but in different ways...

hey nonny mouse

(off to Lanarkshire)

d. byrne said...

bamboo depends psycho panties

bikesgonewild said...

...are you serious ?????????...

...fucking vino ??????...alexandre fucking vinokourov ???...i mean, honestly, alexfuckingzander vinofuckingkourov wins the gold in the shadow of 'big fucking ben' ???...holy shit !!!...

...so, here, his finest hour, likely a swan song, a cap, nay, a crown to the end of a wonderful yet controversial career & much more likely, a payback, a simple yet giant "...fuck you, bsnyc/rtms/wcrm !!!...can you see my eyebrows now with the light glinting off my gold medal, you yank cunt ???...", alexandre vinokourov goes back to kazakhstan weighted down with a gold medal on a ribbon around his neck...

...what are the odds ???...

...no, really, what were the odds down at 'the local' that he'd pull this one off ???...

...i'm betting (see what i did there ???) that more than a few pounds, euros & pints were exchanged as the once disgraced, now redeemed, fearless little kazakh hit the line on the mall outside buckingham palace...

...to use a double negative, i'm definitely not nonplussed...

Freddie Douche'stein D.D.S. said...

Flex hose hydration babe ...

I love you ...

Plus I find your pontoonage to be udderly AWESOME!

McFly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
McFly said...

http://nashville.craigslist.org/bik/3155508203.html


Is this legit? Seems legit...

bikesgonewild said...

...ti road frame from trek ???...

...never cared enough about trek to know but as a general all around bike guy, i'm not familiar with them doing a ti road frame...

...might wanna check into it more but even as a steel frame, if it & the componentry are good, could be a decent deal...

McFly said...

I am pretty sure it's the early model where you can see the crabon weave and he mistook it for Ti. He funny.

Tommi Rae Dong said...

Five signs that point to the fact that BSnyc is a major 'STONER!'

1. Friday quiz getting progressivley shorter and easier.

2. Posting blog later and later in the day.

3. Steadily decreasing mentions of David Byrne who does not drive nor own an automobile.

4. The use of the doper's code word 'cilantro'.

5. I fogot the next sign ...

Tommi somebody somebody said...

oh yeah ...

5. NO STICKERS IN THE NEW BOOK!

HE FORGOT THE STICKERS!!!!!

Lil' John said...

Michael Phelps may be in trouble. He stopped by the house last week. On wednesday.

Lil' John said...

YAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEAAAAA!

McFly said...

Her:"C'mon honey, let's watch some olympics."

Me:"Sure. Whatev. What's on?"

Her:"Women's beach volleyball. It's good."

Me:"Helloooooooooo...yes, it's good."

Cavendouche said...

"May I have a bottle of Cipo's Cunt Juice please"?

" We're out of stock. But we do have Peta's Tatas Milk".

Perv Nazi said...

Curtis Ray Nutting, 43, of 400 Foust Road southwest of Mansfield was charged with violation of state sex offender registry laws by Henry County Sheriff’s Deputy Matthew Liotta.

Babe Winklemen said...

Over a month ago I gifted BSnyc commenteratti with the information that Vino would win the 2012 Olympic road race. Like Casey Stengel said "you can look it up."

Odds at that time were 66/1 so a bet of $100 would have returned $6,600.

Did you lay down a bet?

If no then you apparently are a major loser!

LOSER!

Anonymous said...

Panties!

David said...

No soup for you!

Anonymous said...

Anybody know how much the olympics cost to pull off? Anybody? Anybody? 14.46 BILLION DOLLARS. That's some cheddar.

Anonymous said...

The olympic founder would probably think that was perfectly ok.

I mean jesus, they had all kinds of weird stuff early on. Somebody's grandpa has a gold medal in literature. It's really hard to argue that a given sport doesn't belong in the olympics when ping pong and field hockey are events.

It's too bad they cut a few other events, but I have a hard time believing it was to make more time for MTB and BMX as much as it was the same thinking that got baseball and softball removed.

Anonymous said...

McDonald's refused to serve me in the drive through on a bicycle.

The explanation: "I don't think we can serve people on bikes," or something close to that.

Perhaps this event is a form of segregation. It was once the color of skin, but now it how you choose to transport yourself.

I can hear it already: "I'm sorry, sir, we can't serve people on foot."

Feet are simply not good enough.

JB said...

Babe, link to prediction comment or it didn't happen. A broken clock is right twice a day.

JB said...

McFly: have you seen the pics of the Dutch women's field hockey team?

Anonymous said...

Australian Olympic cyclists discover that Oz gold knicks are as bad as Italian white knicks for public display or privates.

McFly said...

No, but I do remember the Vino prediction, though. I have never seen so many spectacular booty/thigh combo's in my life as I am seeing in the London games. Just awesome. That poor mixed girl from Canada doing the sync dives has got one so round she cant' HELP but get a lil' splashback action upon entry. Bless her heart.

McFly said...

Problem Judges?

JB said...

Booty-thigh combination = flank

BuyLike.in said...

Buy Twitter Retweets,Twitter Retweets,Tweets,RT,Retweet,Tweets Retweets,Increase Retweets,Safe Retweets,Quality Retweets,Real Retweets,

http://fiverr.com/youtube_manager/give-you-600-real-twitter-retweets-in-less-then-10-hours-without-any-admin-access-or-harm

kitchen islands said...

Sweet greetings,
Not only is the article amazing so is the website! I really love how it is easy on my eyes and the data are well written.
With Best Wishes
bedroom | sofa | kitchen | bathroom | living room

Anonymous said...

HD kaliteli porno izle ve boşal.
Bayan porno izleme sitesi.
Bedava ve ücretsiz porno izle size gelsin.
Liseli kızların Bedava Porno ve Türbanlı ateşli hatunların sikiş filmlerini izle.
Siyah karanlık odada porno yapan evli çift.
harika Duvar Kağıtları bunlar
tamamen ithal duvar kağıdı olanlar var
2013 Beyaz Eşya modeller
Sizlere Güvenlik Sistemleri ayarliyoruz
Arayin Hırdavat bulun
Samsung Nokia İphone Cep telefonu alin.
Super Led Tv keyfi

Amatör Porno - Amcık Porno - Anal Porno - Asyalı Porno - Bakire Porno - Erotik Porno - Esmer Porno - Fantazi Porno - Gay Porno - Götten Porno - Grup Porno - Hard Porno - HD Porno - Hemşire Porno - Latin Porno - Lezbiyen Porno - Liseli Porno - Olgun Porno - Oral Porno - Rokettube - Sarışın Porno - Sert Porno - Tecavüz Porno - Travesti Porno - Türbanlı Porno - Türk Porno - Ünlü Porno - Yaşlı Porno - Zenci Porno - Karı Koca Porno - Hayvanlı Porno

Resident Evil Jacket said...

Keep Looking for something more that uplift my mind capability. Keep it up.