Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Wednesday on Tuesday: The System Shall Set You Free

Everybody's familiar with the expression, "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em." This is certainly true when it comes to money managers like Martin J. Erzinger, whose luxury automobile alone renders him nearly impervious to justice. All it takes is a simple phone call from a Pizza Hut parking lot for Mercedes roadside assistance to dispatch a forensics team that removes all traces of your victim's DNA from the vehicle's bumper and transfers it to a nearby Hyundai. Not only that, but a Mercedes will even wake you up if you fall asleep at the wheel, though this feature either doesn't work very well, or Erzinger is lying, or, even more likely, both:

Court records say prosecutors expressed skepticism to Milo at a suggestion by Erzinger's defense attorneys that Erzinger might have unknowingly suffered from sleep apnea, and that might have made him caused him to fall asleep at the wheel and hit Milo.

In any event, since we clearly can't beat Erzinger, we must join him instead, and as I was perusing this profile of him I had an idea:

While Erzinger isn't a very good driver, I have no doubt he's a talented money manager, which is why he manages $1 billion and has a "minimum net worth requirement" of $5 million:

Assets Under Management: $1 billion

Minimum Fee for Initial Meeting: None required

Minimum Net Worth Requirement: $5 million


Assuming there are 500,000 people who are very angry about this whole hit-and-run thing, all we'd have to do is put up $10 apiece, form some entity called something like "All You Haters Suck My Balls Enterprises," and then hire Erzinger to manage it for us. With his financial aplomb, I'm sure in five or ten years we'd have a vast fortune--certainly enough that buying a gaundy vehicle such as a Cadillac Escalade or a Lincoln Navigator would barely register as a blip on our financial statements.

Once we'd secured an appropriate corporate vehicle, then a duly appointed "All You Haters Suck My Balls Enterprises" officer would simply fire it up and then "accidentally" (but not-quite-fatally) run into Erzinger while he was playing golf.

While this may seem like primitive "eye for an eye" justice, the truth is it's far from it. The DA has dropped felony charges against Erzinger because such a charge would "have some pretty serious job implications" for him and "justice in this case includes restitution and the ability to pay it." (In other words, money is apparently justice, and the DA claims he wants Erzinger to be able to keep his job so he can pay Milo as much "justice" as possible.) Clearly then, the DA would also drop any felony charges against "All You Haters Suck My Balls Enterprises" for the same reason, reducing them to a misdemeanor count of "using an inappropriate driver on the green." This would insure that we would be able to pay restitution to Erzinger--who would consequently be further bolstered in his ability to pay restitution to Milo. In the end, everybody wins (though some of them will also permanently limp), and best of all it only cost us ten bucks to run some guy down.

Maybe the legal system isn't so broken after all.

Of course, the big question is this: "What should we do with all the extra money?" Certainly even after legal fees and restitution to the victim and repairs to the AYHSMBE Lincoln Navigator there would still be many millions of dollars left over. Well, ITTET, I would recommend being prudent and investing that money in gold and/or Chris King headsets. Sure, it's not as much fun as cashing out and buying a ski house in Vail where you can kill and maim with impunity, but at the very least I'm sure AYHSMBE would be able to pay its shareholders handsome quarterly dividends in the form of wheels of finest horsehair:

Now that's a horse of a different colorway. When I wrote about Cyclocross 2.0 awhile back, I knew things were getting expensive, but even I never dreamed that cyclocross would involve this sort of exotica or that horsehair would become the next crabon weave--though I don't mean to be a "neigh"sayer, since I'm sure these wheels will look absolutely fabulous with your Rapha mink stole-and-muff set.

Actually, what I'd like to know is what happens to the rest of the equine, and I can't help wondering if horse steaks will soon be sizzling on those Coleman PerfectFlows. If so, I'm sure the more serious Cyclocross 2.0ers will be fretting about how much they can have. Fortunately, the good people at BikeRadar have also provided this handy conversion chart:

Calorie Counting

To get your portion sizes right you need to know how many calories you’re using.

1 Determine your base metabolic rate (BMR). Men: BMR = 66 + (6.23 x weight in lb) + (12.7 x height in inches) – (6.8 x age in years). Women: BMR = 655 + (4.35 x weight in lb) + (4.7 x height in inches) – (4.7 x age in years).

2 Multiply your BMR by the level of activity closest to what you do. Sedentary (little or no exercise): BMR x 1.2. Lightly active (light exercise/sports 1-3 days a week): BMR x 1.375. Moderately active (moderate exercise/ sports 3-5 days a week): BMR x 1.55. Very active (hard exercise/sports 6-7 days a week): BMR x 1.725. Extra active (very hard exercise/sports every day and physical job): BMR x 1.9.


I have no idea what any of that means.

Speaking of training advice, I was stunned when a reader emailed me recently and asked me for some--though it wasn't exactly the sort of thing you'd ask Chris Carmichael:

I'm a first year racer and after racing road this past summer I'm now on to cross. I'm not the fastest, but overall I'm pretty pleased with my results, but now I'm looking to improve some of my finishes. To do this I have gotten more consistent with my training, and I've seemed to feel a Little improvement. I do have one area of my fitness I'm not so sure of. I'm pretty much a daily pot smoker, not a full on stoner but a couple bowls a day without any tobacco of any kind. Does this significantly affect my VO2 max? Pot can't be as bad as tobacco right? How much would quiting affect my fitness (even though I know I won't)?

Now, this may peg me as a "square" or "narc," but I'd say that being "a daily pot smoker" who consumes a "couple bowls a day" is pretty much the definition of "full on stoner." Is it possible to smoke more pot? Yes. Does smoking a couple bowls a day every day mean you're pretty much stoned all the time anyway? Also yes.

This is not to say I begrudge his lifestyle choice. Similarly, I do not begrudge the lifestyle choice of the anal-retentive bike racer, either. However, they're also mutually exclusive, and for most people there's not much to grapple with since choosing one tends to conveniently eliminate the other. You may have heard the old saying: "Strong, light, cheap: pick two." Similarly, when it comes to the "Wednesday Weed" and bike racing, a good rule of thumb is: "Smoking pot all day, winning bike races: pick one." The truth is that it's almost impossible to successfully be two totally different things at once--this sweet bicycle which was forwarded to me by a reader being a notable exception:

Rat Bike - $40 (Sun Prairie)
Date: 2010-11-08, 10:48AM CST
Reply to: [deleted]

Get some street cred with this bad boy. Tribute to old school west coast motorcycles. Still has functional shifters, 3 rings up front and 7 in back. Front shock. Rear brakes. If you see this bike chained up it is for your protection, not to keep it from being stolen! $40 obo.



In any case, I explained to the aspiring racer that it really doesn't matter anyway, since he's consuming a banned substance on a daily basis so any results he gets are technically invalid, which I think like totally blew his mind.

Of course, while the "Wednesday Weed" may not produce bike racing results, it can produce some florid poetry, which I suspect may be the case here:

You have a weak handshake. - w4m - 206 (The impossible address. )
Date: 2010-11-09, 1:15AM EST

I stood in your garden,
I was wearing your t-shirt with no pants on,
my legs exposed to that below average summer night.
I could see the goosebumps running down the length of your forearms,
you seemed to have something on your mind.

I saw your eyes shifting towards my legs,
bruised and cut from a recent bike accident.
"C'est quoi ├ža?"
You pointed at some specific scars,
still fresh and raw.

"C'est rien!"
You put your shoulder around me,
I started crying.
"Pourquoi?"
You asked while trying to see my tears.

Those scars are still raw,
even months after not spending time with you.
You were everything in a man I could want,
but,
I wasn't your woman.

Speaking of pantslessness and of horsehair (as I was earlier), it remains to be seen whether the trend will trickle down to the "fixie" scene, though one reader has forwarded me the following Craigslist post which indicates that they may be more interested in clear coats made from a shot of ejaculate:

Fixed gear wheelset, Origin8 SS bike, carbon fiber cranks, track bars (Neenah)
Date: 2010-11-07, 10:14AM CST
Reply to: [deleted]

I have a set of EighthInch Tessa wheels that are ready to bolt on and go. Comes with matching EighthInch cog(16T) and lockring already installed and CST white tires and tubes. The hubs and spokes are black and non-machined gold rims. These wheels are spotless and spin true. Normally these run $140 and then $35 for the cog and lockring and $40 for the tubes and tires. All for a whooping $150!

EighthInch gold trackbars. These are brand new never been mounted. I was going to strip the gold anodizing but I just want chrome track bars instead. $20

FSA Pro Team Issue carbon crankset with bottom bracket. These had the decals removed and have some scratches and whatnot from everyday riding but are still in great working condition. With a light sanding and a shot of come clear coat these would look brand new. The bottom bracket is sealed bearing 68mm English threaded(ISO) Shimano unit purchased this past summer from Cranked. $75

Origin8 Cutler single speed bike. I used this as my around town bike with my son. This normally runs $240 from Cranked. 700c wheelset with a freewheel. $150

I've got more stuff like cranks, road bars, aero brake levers, frames...etc. Everything is located in Neenah. Trades welcomed also.


If you ever walk into one of those track bike boutiques and an employee says, "Here, let me clear coat that for you," you should probably refuse.

114 comments:

Anonymous said...

CONTADOR

Anonymous said...

first

Anonymous said...

3rd billionaire

Anonymous said...

top 3?

hey nonny mouse

bloomers100 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nogocyclist said...

It's Wednesday already?

Anonymous said...

cough...wha?

Pontius Pilate said...

HAIL CSZR

-P.P.

Anonymous said...

Top Ten!! Wheel Suckers!!

Anonymous said...

top10eel!

Anonymous said...

Something needs to be done about these pantsless frenchmen.

frenchie said...

@ anon 12:10 PM

it´s the girl who had no pants on.

There´s nothing wrong with pantsless french ladies, on the contrary. Trust me on this one...

M. Joseph said...

Ha Ha loving it!

M. Joseph said...

Erzinger can choke on an overpriced Veal Liver though.

mikeweb said...

You know, a billion dollars isn't what it used to be.

Mongo Pusher said...

Top 20...Hemptastic!

Anonymous said...

brownies not bowls for bikers... but don't forget to adjust the BMR coefficient table.

Anonymous said...

although a few bowls a day may limit ones ability to bike race - has he considered a career as an olympic level snowboarder? They pretty much go hand-in-hand...?

Anonymous said...

I'm in, where do I send my ten.

crosspalms said...

I think I heard that whooping $150 the other night. Hard to fall back asleep.
Hey, does that new Toronto mayor need a wealth manager?

JahKnow said...

“Trust me, after taxes, a million dollars is not a lot of money,” - Michael Steele

Anonymous said...

An old Willie Nelson joke:

If you're going to have sex with an animal it should be a horse.

If it doesn't work out, at least you have a ride home.

Anonymous said...

two bowls daily? GET A BMX!

also, when I try to clearcoat things, it dries to a satin finish. anyone have similar problems?

Anonymous said...

Top 30 and Clen free!

Fritz said...

finally my forty bucks can buy me some street cred...

3G said...

This makes the "greatest hits" collection for sure!

PawnShop said...

Speaking of Wednesday...
That moron District Attorney claims to be Mark Hurlbert, but I smell a pungent hint of Woody Harrelson ( with hair ) in his appearanceway.

I am not a Range Rover engine said...

Snobby sometimes you are such a peasant.

Everybody must know that 5 million is a minimum, and you wouldn't even get a monogrammed thank you card from Erzinger.

The company car must be Range Rover. Because according to my Yakima catalog, Range Rovers have 4 bicycle carrying options. Probably one in the front, to leave marks on an unsuspecting cyclist you just ran over.

I hear they are really good vehicles to draft behind also.

Those puny Mercedes Bumpers don't have a chance if they fall off just by hitting a cycling MD.

Anonymous said...

'you can only be successful at one thing'
this is probably the dumbest platitude i have heard in a while;
perhaps if you are narrow-minded, lack any inherent talent, or just dont have the patience to follow through, then this is true;
i think this a regular attitude formed by regular people who probably wont be successful at anything;
personally, i believe well-roundedness is a prerequisite of success;
i have been successful at powerlifting, wrestling, mma, can program in most languages, gotten A+, security+, network+, linux+ certification, and have been a professional (paid) card player;
although i currently smoke the herbs, i have used about every drug known to man;
i wouldnt recommend drug use, but if you think something like that will keep you from success, you are just a weak-minded tool;
otherwise, keep up the good work!

PawnShop said...

Re: Smoking pot all day, winning bike races: pick one.

"Smilin'" George Mount might quibble with you on that...

Bristol Traffic said...

We in the Bristol Traffic Project celebrate a judicial system in which the wealthy can kill or maim over the poor. It has existed for a long time, just needs to be more formalised. Here in Britain, because of our socialist health care and pension system, running over an elderly person can actually save the state money, so should be encouraged. However, running over a student or teenager may not be so good for the country, as they have future earning and tax paying potential.

This is why we believe that pedestrians and cyclists should really be obliged to somehow indicate what their current and future value is -perhaps some iphone app- and then your mercedes can evaluate this, compare it with your own earnings, and warn you when there is a pedestrian whose value is such that you will have to swerve round them. People without iphones are inherently worthless, hence expendable.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 1:24pm,

But how are you at bike racing?

--RTMS

Anonymous said...

I have to admit, that rat bike is pretty rad.

Anonymous said...

Where do I send the tenner for AYHSMBE? And can we have a drawing to determine who gets to run over utter douche scumbag Erzinger’s balls with the Lincoln Navigator?

Anonymous said...

2912.62 calories

Anonymous said...

Anon 1:24

Thats some dorky-ass shit to be good at.

db said...

Gosh, Anon. 1:24. Any chance that off the herb you'd be good at something useful? Like writing a readable paragraph?

Anonymous said...

I smoke pot. I bike well. I would bike better if I laid off the grass...But then I would be giving up the supreme ultimate high of smoking a fresh bowl while slightly oxygen deprived at the crest of my summits before heading back down.

It helps me calm down and realize there is nothing zen about expecting the world to cooperate with a 'five moves ahead' contrived-reality fantasy.

leroy said...

Anon 1:24 --

I need your help. Which Napolean Dynamite quote are you channelingf:

"You know... there's like a butt-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bo-staff."

Or

"You know, like nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills... Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills."

ringcycles said...

and all this time I thought Napoleon Dynamite was a comedy, when it was really a bio-pic about anon 1:24!

"you know, like nunchuk skills, bow-hunting skills, computer hacking skills..."

maybe if we're nice, he'll teach us some Rex Kwon Do moves.

Mr McKnuckles said...

The DA explains his reasoning -
http://www.vaildaily.com/article/20101109/EDITS/101109849/1021&ParentProfile=1065

Not entirely sure what to make of this arguement, as I'm no lawyer, but the case might be a bit more complex than the perp got off because he's rich.

ringcycles said...

Leroy: I suppose snide minds think alike?

leroy said...

Is it just me or has anyone else felt that they've lost their edge by becoming well rounded?

Anonymous said...

$100 if I get to drive the Navigator.

leroy said...

Ringcycles -- yes!!!

Thank God I'm not the only one hearing these voices.

Anonymous said...

Here's my $10.

I have also removed my pants, if that will help.

Anonymous said...

All charges on Erzinger were not dropped. This is just one of those news reports that got released with the wrong information, and it spreads false information.. and obviously people with blogs can blow it right out of proportion.

What happened was (like in most cases like this) that a plea bargain was entered by the prosecution, asking to drop the felony charge relating to leaving the scene of an accident.

He would (or is) still facing criminal charges related to misdemeanours (possible jail time, or whatever + monetary compensation) and the defendant should still have the option to sue (not criminal court) for damages (monetary) relating to negligence.

Even a simple TV show like "Law and Order" should demonstrate how plea bargains work and what they are. Very few legal cases actually make it to a courtroom. Most of the time, it is settled outside of the courtroom.

Now if the rich doctor was me (not rich or a doctor), his case would be settled by the police at the scene who told me it was OK for the car to hit me and ruin my bike, and that I should "pay attention".. even though I clearly was on a green light and she was illegally turning and accelerating into me.. but who am I to object to official police reports as my broken body and bike are hauled off of the street!

Test Tickle said...

COME COAT

JIZZ LOAD

WADD BLOW

GOOY LIKE

balls.

frilly said...

I'm in for a tenspot. Please do not hang one of those disgusting ballsack thingies from the trailer hitch or no deal.

wishiwasmerckx said...

We should sprinkle all of our daily conversations with just a pretentious soupcon of French.

Quicksquirt McHurt said...

I'd hit it.

Nathan said...

I doubt Crater was a two bowl a day guy, but you can win a bike race or two with the Mary Jane. http://www.cyclingnews.com/news/usada-sanctions-crater-for-marijuana-doping-violation

Anonymous said...

MINK MUFF

Don't care if the guy does jail time, but he should at least get the "felon" tag. In his business, it's just as bad.

No justice, no peace.

hillbilly said...

but what about "smoke or get smoked?"

Anonymous said...

C.H.U.G. M.O.T.U.

ant1 said...

ant1st!

Hussein said...

All surgeons uh uh do is to you know make people sick on purpose so so so they can remove their tonsils. And make a lot of money. I wanted. To socialize the fuck out of of them.

The investment banker, a Wall Street Fat Cat uh uh uh had his as bailed out. It's fine with me, perfectly legal and constitutional to uh to uh to uh run over surgeons. I applaud him. For doing so.

mikeweb said...

Vote for Pedro.

streepo said...

I'm in for 50 if I can ride shotgun

grog said...

I don't mean to be a "neigh"sayer.
Go directly to jail do not pass go.

J-Bird said...

I'll throw in $10 for the privilege of seeing some tire tracks on Mr. Erzinger.

Somewhere.... I dunno.... said...

I'll kick up a couple large if I can back over him a few times.


(SSSHHHHPPPPFFFFFFFFF.....Whew!)(Cough Hack Cough Cough)

ervgopwr said...

HORS WEEL

CLIR COAT

Agree on the top notch content of this post. It flowed exquisitely and ultimately landed onto of that douche in the SUV of death.

annon (insert time here) are so insightful today. what would we do without them?

Anonymous said...

Damn -- I was hoping to see more about wheel sucking, rather than the more depressing topic of rich people getting away with near-murder.

Because I just got back from a long ride on country roads, and I can suggest another reason not to sit on someone's wheel: it's fucking creepy. I'm a female out in the middle of nowhere, crawling along at 13 mph, and this dude in full lycra with a dentist/lawyer bike who I KNOW can easily leave me in the dust apparently decided he was going to ride just behind me for about a mile. I eventually lost him by turning (which he did too) and then slamming on the brakes as he went sailing by, but it was fucking creepy.

So. Off to be depressed about the justice system in this country.

Steven Falkowski said...

No other bike has inspired as much intra-office dialog as The Rat Bike. Whatta gem.

bavarian camembert said...

30€ if you use a bmw X5.

After all, only german luxury cars suit this kind of clientele. He did use a mercedes, didn´t he?

bikesgonewild said...

...anon 1:24pm...this guy just might be the one from tv..."the most interesting man in the world"...either way, truly a legend in his own mind...

CommieCanuck said...

Those French-Canadian chicks are weird. Or, she could just be another pretentious sophomore that thinks that interjecting french terms makes her sound smart. Je ne sais. Probably wears fake reading glasses.

bikesgonewild said...

...put down the pipe & put away the wednesday weed, 'hussein'...you need to work on perfecting cohesive & articulate sentence structuring...

...just sayin'...

Anonymous said...

Erm...a bowl of pot?

Anonymous said...

Safety first... I enjoy the vaporizer and a narcotic amount of caffeine before a road ride in mountain bike shoes and Dickies. So I guess there are many reasons I'm eschewed by the carbonati... I look like a jackass, I regularly portage obnoxious shit like barbed wire, and of course I'm slow. Really though, does the power of a proper road cleat make up for the fact one can't walk, run, climb in said bike shoe.

MyWorld said...

The D.A. in Vail/Eagle County CO clearly needs the full Sherman McCoy treatment. Look it up if you don't know-it's important.

bikesgonewild said...

...leroy & ringcycles, together...

...is it a case of: great minds think alike ???...

...or fools seldom differ ???...

...you get to decide, today on 'bike snob nyc...

botch casually said...

I can see smokin' a fatty and flattening a certain well-heeled sand wedge swinging fatty in one of these babies. http://www.luxurycarts.com/

de dux de luxe said...

In Berkeley we smoke as we choose and dance just as good as we want...My medical Pinarello has been fitted with down tube bong fittings made by vegan pagans and they dance pretty well too...after each ride I download my ashes and reload my downtube...It gets complicated...wheel sucking brakeless fixed gearers get the full smoke stack effect usually resulting in their stopping at the nearest fast food location for first aid...
the ashes easily brush off and burns to lycra make those cool torn when you buy 'em pre used fashion
statements...
film at eleven...

foureyes mcshane said...

Anon 3:31, I'm sorry. Riding behind a beautiful woman albeit quite slowly is one of life's simple pleasures. I confess doing this on numerous rides.
Creepy is as creepy do......

MechanicMatt said...

Pistadex is Sky High in Kansas City today...

http://kansascity.craigslist.org/bik/2051311185.html

cwg said...

Pantani was coked up and he was a great climber...So keep on toking dude!

Anonymous said...

Re: Smoking pot all day, winning bike races: pick one.

Also, Missy Giove

Anonymous said...

I'm confused. Here's what I got over the past two days: it's bloody not ok to assault a biker with a car especially if you're a fat cat but it is ok to assault ('Cinzano' or otherwise) a fellow biker for wheelsucking. Is this right?

bikesgonewild said...

...ahhh, yes...i can tell by that stream of bike/bong consciousness from ol' pal senor de dux de luxe that the harvest was good in nor-cal this year...it's gonna wednesday 'til july...

Anonymous Coward said...

Where do I send the tener?
I look forward to AYHSMBE company shareholder meetings. I assume those are held on Wednesdays?

Anonymous said...

You guys are all whimps, I will throw in 100 if we buy a tank. A big one, with lots of missles, machine guns and shells. Armour piercing ones, and lets patrol the back road of vail, anybody with a german luxury car gets it.

I am going after anon 2:14 just because he thinks it is being blown out of proportion.

I will blow you out of proportion.

Anonymous said...

I know why I drive a bike.

I have know idea what "Two very power philanthropic choices are available to you and your family for your planned giving: donor advised funds and private foundations."

I think he may sell insurance.

Anonymous said...

If you gave me the choice of having the guy who ran me over lose his job and have a felony and not pay me much compensation or keep his job, only have misdemeanors, but I might get a sympathetic ruling in my civil case and take his next 5 years' earnings.

I'll take the fat wad of cash and feel ok about that douche keeping his fancy job.

And regarding wednesday weeds and performance, I know pro roadies(domestic and int'l racers alike) who smoke weed every chance they get. Maybe they quit during the season to pass drug tests, but its not hurting their training much.

And I smoke everyday and get paid good money to get a phd, teach undergrads, do research, etc.. I think that stoner implies addict which implies you're ruining your life.

Just like you can eat everyday and be or not be a food addict, you can smoke everyday and be or not be a pot addict.

Anonymous said...

this is anon 124;
point taken bikesnob, i have never competitively raced, running or bicycle;
i am a commuter who rides an 80's frame road bike with GEARS;
i am not perfect, just very critical of myself which is why i end up being very good at anything i focus on;
what bothers me is the stereotype of the lazy stoner;
i also agree that a few bowls a day qualifies as an 'all-out stoner;'
i am almost an all-out stoner but i would have to say that everyone who criticizes me for such probably expends about 1/50 of the energy i do every day;
i am not some macho a*hole;
i act like a pussy but if someone yells at me or generally tries to mess with me in traffic i will beat them until their mind is sufficiently open, and i have in the past;
i realize it is somewhat logical to assume people who do drugs are useless dregs of society, but sometimes that is not the case at all;
the person who felt the need to ask bikesnob, an admittedly slow rider, if they could race and smoke is probably too unsure of themselves to do so, but it isnt impossible;
btw, how, beyond a minor typo, is the paragraph i wrote not cogent?
i even go to the trouble to insert newline characters ala python (semicolons and newlines instead of periods make it easier for fixed gear sheep to read);
the only type of person who would criticize someone for being well-rounded and generally good at a lot of shit is probably no good at everything;
i concede that my lungs would be in better shape, however, if i didnt smoke at all;

Anonymous said...

Anon 124 no caps or punctuation is for pussies

And please don't brag about violence. It's tacky.

Anonymous said...

Anon 518:
How will you feel when he does it again?

Got yours, fuck the next guy.

Your a charmer.

Schleppi Longstocking said...

Here is another case of someone being above the law:

http://www.courant.com/community/windsor-locks/hc-windsor-locks-cops1110-20101109,0,4982907.story

Joachim said...

all you haters suck my enterprise

last dux on the left said...

There is indeed a beneficial harvest in NoCal. It will
be officially the "Weekend" well into August.

Anonymous said...

can't wait for the Rapha boy's to drop the Mink Stuff the Muff...heard they are using Swiss Mink

Sarah's Revenger Squad said...

Out in the boonies no Rapha but plenty of ralph.....
Muscle Moose Muff and such...

Anonymous said...

Did you write to him? martin.j.erzinger@morganstanleypwm.com

Maybe ask to interview him or invite him to your next BRA?

Simpleminded said...

What is the root to the current "maker" movement -- http://www.beckethitch.com/

Is there a light at the end of this tunnel?

Anonymous said...

Assuming they both get to keep their jobs, DA Hurlbert and Erzinger both should be required to ride bicycles to work going forward. That's pretty close to the death penalty in Colorado.

Wolf

Pantsless said...

pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless pantsless

Anonymous said...

The latest news I could find on Google is that the money manager is being offered a plea deal of two misdemeanors that will stay on his driving record a long time, while the victim was pressing for a felony that would not, and would cost him his job. That's a rather less blatantly one-sided situation than was originally reported.

Lanterne Rouge said...

Did you hear the one about the billion dollar fund manager who needed a liver transplant?

Boycott.

Anonymous said...

100 comments. Ha Ha Ha Ha!

apologies to the Count.

Alex Dove said...

Although I'm sure there are many other facts missing out of the media reports from this case, I am still shaking my head and wondering why the felony charge was dropped. The victim has even told the prosecution that it isn't a matter of financial restitution.

This case strengthens the point that if you want to get away with murder in America, make sure you do it in a car.

Side note: A photo of an urban gorillaa for you:

Kobe said...

Anon 5:09

There are no back roads in Vail.

You're gonna need a lot of ammo.

Where do I send the $100?

Anonymous said...

A flaw in the AYHSMB plan: it fails to note the distinction between

1. expensive car hitting cyclist

vs.

2. expensive car hitting golfer.


People in fancy jobs don't get out of ALL felony charges. The system will also take the relative value of the alleged, so-called "victim" into account. And as all decent people know, golfers represent all that is good and noble in humanity, while cyclists are, well, scum whose offing only represents a societal good.

So you see how this thing COULD possibly get us all in trouble.

Anonymous said...

Biker #1: I say we kill him
Biker gang: Yeaah!
Biker #2: I say we hang him, *then* we kill him

Anonymous said...

somebody needs go take him out happy gilmore style...the price is wrong bitch!

PawnShop said...

vs.

3. expensive wife hitting golfer's car.

Anonymous said...

Kobe,

With a tank, there will be lots of new backroads, some of them going right through those gated condo communities. We can use the hummer as a backup ammunition vehicle.

crosspalms said...

Maybe Erzinger is a job for the Masked Night Rider.

Anonymous said...

Advice for the stoner who's so stoned he doesn't know he's a stoner: For the record, pot has MORE of the crap that clogs up your lungs than tobacco, not less. If you must have your pot and ride too, try putting the stuff in some brownies instead of smoking it. You won't go any faster, but you'll think you'e going like, a hundred miles an hour, dude.

Anonymous said...

I'm in for 50 if I can ride my Motobecane over Erzingers "pants yabbies"

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Fixie Bikes said...

Love craigslist, always worth a good laugh

Lisa Langford said...

There is indeed a beneficial harvest in NoCal. It will be officially the "Weekend" well into August.