Friday, October 9, 2009

BSNYC Friday Fun Quiz!

For those of you who follow the Gregorian calendar, today is an auspicious one. (Call me a retrogrouch, but I'm sticking with the Julian calendarway.) First of all, it's Friday. Second of all, 1,006 years ago today, Leif Erikson became the first European to visit Canada, and then, 20 minutes later, the first European to patronize a Tim Hortons. Most importantly though, today is Messenger Appreciation Day. (Or, according to my browser window heading, "Messenger Aprpeciation Day.) Not only that, but Messenger Aprpeciation Day now has total legitimacy, having just earned the coveted Portland Seal of Cycling Smugness.

However, before you start aprpeciating messengers too broadly, keep in mind that this holiday does not honor all messengers; it only honors the ones for whom messengering is a lifestyle choice. These are the brave souls who selflessly allow their costly liberal arts degrees to lie fallow in order ride their exotic boutique "work bikes" around the world's most fashionable cities all day long while carrying pictures of models in their custom hand-sewn bags and flitting from boutique company to boutique company. So aprpeciate not the woefully unfashionable person of limited means and opportunity on the department store bike for whom a job as a bicycle delivery person is the only thing between sustenance and destitution. Instead, honor those brave souls who choose to pay for tattoo sleeves instead of health insurance, for it is only the voluntary poor who understand the true nature of sacrifice.

Now, in the spirit of cycling togetherness, let us reflect on the messenger's contribution to society by watching the now-classic Dogpaw video:



Yes, even bicycle messengering has its lone wolves.



"All You Haters Aprpeciate My Dogpaw"

So on this day take a moment to aprpeciate an acceptably fashionable messenger, assuming you can differentiate an actual messenger from a non-messengering urban cyclist. (Hint: the messenger is considerably more pungent.) And if you're the sort of person who resents bicycle messengers for their freewheeling lifestyle (I mean "freewheeling" figuratively, since of course the fashionable ones use track bikes) just take a moment to consider the alternatives from which they've managed to escape. Because a job in graphic design is no kind of life.

Speaking of aprpeciation and Fridays, I aprpeciate the fact that this Friday once again provides me with the opportunity to "curate" another quiz. As always, study the item, think, and click on your answer. If you're right you'll know it, and if you're wrong you'll see a fashion show.

As always, thanks for reading, and thanks to the readers who have forwarded items that wound up in this quiz. And of course, special thanks to all the messengers out there. Your work is aprpeciated.

--BSNYC/RTMS





1) Who is this?





3) Which is not an actual riding tip from Brian Miller Hot Rodding?

--"When perpendicularly crossing flowing traffic, initially steer into the flow. When a large enough gap presents itself, dive through it."
--"Cars will have often not stopped prior to red light signals, at which point you should be careful to resume evasive action."
--"When approaching cross streets, pay attention to their direction. See the ONE WAY signs. Get in the habit of switching to the upstream side of that cross flow to avoid turning cars of your lane."




4) No wonder cyclocross is getting so popular. Ksyriums from Cyclocrossworld.com now come standard with:






5) "Those wacky Portlanders!" The hot new trend in cyclocross is now:

--Tandem bikes



6) "Those wacky Portlanders!" The hot new trend in city bikes is now the:





7) "Those wacky drug addicts!" Professional cyclist Chad Gerlach has relapsed:

--True




8) "Now that's curating!" According to the seller of this Felt Gridlock, how much did he pay the bike shop to assemble his "custom" chain?



***Special Cycling Couture-Themed Bonus Question***

This photo, taken by a reader in Amsterdam, reveals Rapha's top-secret bespoke cycling suit testing program in action.

--True
--False


99 comments:

ben miracle said...

gave it a shot

g said...

please

Asterisk said...

aste risk

g said...

best place EVAH!

Anonymous said...

Top TEN!!!

Asterisk said...

just 3rd, but first time podium

rezado said...

Man, I aprpeciate friday.

Andrew said...

cuttin crew in the top ten! woo hoo! happy messenger appreciation day!

hillbilly said...

is the madsen cx racer 'laid back'? is a recumbent in a cx race doubly laid back?

have a great weekend

Anonymous said...

Peleton

Klaus Mohn said...

PEDI CABB

ken e. said...

bang!

Astroluc said...

PACK FODR

JClev19 said...

I'm aprpeciating me some girl jeans today.

Astroluc said...

Beacause a job in graphic design is no kind of life

...you cut to the core, mr. Snob.

Isolation Helmet said...

That chain is totally worth it.

This weekend is Biketoberfest in Fairfax, CA. That is something I can truly aprpeciate!

Daddo said...

"this teaming organism that is San Francisco"

ewwwwwww!!!!!

also, that's the 70s ain't no 90s

Dave said...

How can I get me a truing wench? I can't afford the wheel set

JClev19 said...

BTW - does a Miyagi fixie come with a "leg-sweep" guard? Is there also a Cobra Kai fixie as well?

Astroluc said...

and not to bring the mood down; but y'al should read this if you haven't seen it yet:

http://www.tucsonbikelawyer.com/heavy/

Bad Lawyer said...

. . . for it is only the voluntary poor who understand the true nature of sacrifice.

A profound insight, snobbie!

Charles said...

Top 20?

missarahjessica said...

Hilarious, as usual

Bad Lawyer said...

Astroluc--

Serious, downer! The picture is heartbreaking.

Crispy said...

THON GMAN

Ralphy said...

Miyagi's blog entries are copied (stolen, taken verbatim, assembled) from other websites, particularly Wikipedia. I guess you 'curate' a blog the same way you 'curate' a bike.

Daddo said...

is the last line of that fashion video:

"get off your bike, unsnap your pants and go about your business"?

Asterisk said...

Astroluc,

thanks for posting. Very sad.

*

Anonymous said...

Not to burst your bubble, bikesnob, but ksyriums have always come with truing wrenches. Oh Mavic, and their proprietary nipples.

Scott said...

Ok, how the hell do you "curate" a bike? You don't. What a bunch of ignorant pretentious idiots. It's ridiculous how much people overuse that word. Well I'm off to go "curate" my blog now...

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 12:49pm,

I thought exactly the same thing at first, but the reader who forwarded the link explained these come with "truing wenches," not "truing wrenches."

--BSNYC

Brian said...

I'm in the process of curating a stripper pole add-on for the keg bike. Are ther strippers in Portland?

CRGO CROSS

Stevil said...

Wasn't Leif Erikson in the 13th Floor Elevators?

mikeweb said...

The podium maintains its integrity

ed said...

hey I rode in the early 90's in SF and I thought Dogpaw was a caricature then..And its obvious to me that the fact that the Gravity Bong Bike was culled to make room for the beer bike is a sure sign of the approaching Apocalypse.

wishiwasmerckx said...

I knew that there was a strong microbrewery presence in the Northwest, and according to the link, I see that longtime Boston brewmaster Sam Adams is now the mayor of Portland. Suspecting that I was being "punked," I called Oregon Governor Jose Curevo's office for confirmation, but nobody answers on Fridays on account of they have moved their schedule to four tens.

P.S. The Miyagi bikes sure are shiny! Wax on; wax off...

Astroluc said...

Lawyer, * :

the pic is heartbreaking; and I just thought it necessary for people to know what's going on.

Ride safe this weekend (and every day)!

RYDE SAYF

Anonymous said...

I had a truing wench for a while. Sure, it was fun at first, but if you think foofoo wheels are high maintenance, well, be careful what you wish for.

ant1 said...

ant1st!

mikeweb said...

I'm an urban freedom fighter too.

I fight freedom where ever I find it.

rezado said...

Y'all. No?

rezado said...

I need a true wench in my life.

SubComandante Sasquatch said...

...autobus!

Bike Messenger Day in Portland has less to do with smugality than it does with the mayor's love of young men in skinny jeans.

...not that there's anything wrong with it.

shmaltz herring said...

SMUG CONE

Anonymous said...

You mean there are really still bicycle messengers? I had assumed that the fax machine and Internet had done them all in. (I'm actually not joking, I seriously thought the "messenger" style was a fashion statement)

Long live Dogpaw!!!!!

Anonymous said...

The guy in the interbike video at 1:19 is hilarious...kinda dancing with his hands in his pockets...looks like every clown i used to see at the bar when i was 18

Craften said...

(To the tune of Dear Mama by Tupac)

I reminisce on the stress I caused, it was hell
Huggin' on my messenga from a jail cell
And who'd think in elementary?
Heeey! I'd see the penitentiary, one day
And runnin' from the police, that's right
Messenga catch me, put a whoopin to my backside
And even as a crack fiend, messenga
You always was a black queen, messenga
I finally understand
for a messenga it ain't easy tryin to raise a messenga
You always was committed
A poor single messenga on welfare, tell me how ya did it
There's no way I can pay you back
But the plan is to show you that I understand
You are appreciated

LoRoK said...

Wow, I got a lot wrong today. I think it's because I so enjoyed the tweed-wearing girl (not the weed-smoking designer.)

Can I just say that the Hot Rodder's, or whatever his name is, riding tips for urban riding are generally correct for an aggressive style of riding? Of course, they won't matter or make sense for the slow-poke commuter types; but for us posengers who like to ride fast they are mostly spot on. When you ride like that often and get used to being invisible to the cars, you learn how to keep yourself out of potential trouble spots and that's what most of those suggestions are about. Of course, if I were on a dutch city bike I wouldn't be able to get myself into those trouble spots to begin with. I do really aprpeciate those tips, though, as they are pretty much the same as what I've come to make up for my own style of riding.

Anonymous said...

@astroluc: some tv footage about the funeral:

http://www.woai.com/news/local/story/Hundreds-gather-to-honor-couple-killled-in/2s6ea5GaHkSF6-Qv4hl6Ug.cspx

bk jimmy said...

The human puts out a mere .4 horsepower.

It keeps its momentum!

youaretheengine said...

TIM- BITS

Seanywonton said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Seanywonton said...

"Cross behind strolling pedestrians. They do not need to know what they are doing."

I must not be of his riding level, because I have no idea what this means.

Reed Enwright said...

That L'Anse aux Meadows/Timmy reference seals it; your a not so secret Canuck wannabe.

eeeeeeeeee said...

great post/quiz

belmont sledgehammer said...

Man, these quizzes are eerily reminiscent of high school. I think I probably got an F- on that today.

And SubComSasquatch 1:25,

Ouch! Nice though. The recently concluded petition to recall our embattled mayor failed miserably. Leading me to believe maybe the bikini rider guy from Florida should bring his act up here to the great and considerably more tolerant northwest?

grog said...

Streets are the veins,
We are the blood.
Free coffee & doughnut!
WOOO HOOO

Anti Banana Hammock League said...

"we do know this: If a guy is wearing a Speedo, we've already seen too much."

ain't that the truth!

balls.

d. fofonov said...

Am reading American news outlets about Mr. Obama winning Tour de France and many gold medals at Olympics. Am talking to Babushka on her Yablika and even her not knowing how Mr. Obama winning all these things. Is heptaminol playing tricks for memory? What to be saying is, What the fuck?

Rantwick said...

"it is only the voluntary poor who understand the true nature of sacrifice."

I love you, man.

yogisurf said...

I curated a very poor score. I fell for nipples, RJ and full release. :-( But it's Friday!

:-)

Seanywonton said...

That's funny. I served beer off the wacky beer bike a few weekends ago. I'll say this, Hopworks makes some damn great beers!

bk jimmy said...

I always fall for nipples.

Anonymous said...

Hey, don't mention it, although he's done nothing yet, we'd just like to point out how much we didn't like the previous fella (now that he's out of power).

Since when "did never taking a shower" become synonym with "urban guerilla"?

Strayhorn said...

Aw, jeeze, hard to keep up the humor after reading astroluc's link.

Be safe.

bk jimmy said...

that's urban gorilla.

Anonymous said...

because a job in industrial design is no kind of life.

Anonymous said...

Not to burst your bubble, bikesnob, but ksyriums have always come with truing wrenches. Oh Mavic, and their proprietary nipples.

Wtf, I did not get one with mine. who do I call to send back my untrue Wheels?

CommieCanuck said...

Obama's Nobel turned the peace prize into the Grammys.

db said...

Ah man, the Gerlach story is sad. Some people just can't handle life.

I'm not even touching the link Astroluc posted. I'm not a strong person.

bikesgonewild said...

...rantwick...

...janis sang it..."when ya ain't got nothin', ya got nothin' else ta lose"...

bikesgonewild said...

...& astroluc...

...i certainly can't fault you for posting that link, but my god, that is one of the most heartbreaking fotos i could imagine...

...i'm speechless...

Anonymous said...

"it is only the voluntary poor who understand the true nature of sacrifice"

This will go down as your single greatest quote of all time. No contest.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and please stop using so many God damn acronyms. We can't keep track.

CommieCanuck said...

Gerlach sounds like he should be treated for mental illness. No one seems to be helping him. Society just tosses these people like trash.

Brian said...

@CommieCanuck 4:25,

Thanks for saying it. Goes well with the healthcare sermons between cigarette breaks.

OUTA TUCH

red neckerson said...

somebody tolt me if you becom president you gets lots of pussy for life so me and ricky is anouncing our nomination for president

free beer for everbody kinda like obamer money exept you can drink it

figure its easier to becom president then win the tour day france but the end results is the same ifn you knows what im sayin

kfg said...

The only problem with trying to sell a bike with a $200 curated chain is that you have to find some poor (figuratively speaking), dumb bastard with exactly the same taste in butt ugly as you.

Anonymous said...

The bike is dead ! Long live the trikke !

www.trikkeme.net

And I predict that 2010 will see the rise of the fixie with wooden rimmed wheels. Remember, you heard it here first.

Anonymous said...

at first, i thought Chad was trying to hide while taking a dump next to that wall. At least reading the paper in the alley is classier than taking a dump in the alley.
On a more serious note, I'm sad to hear 'bout chad. I saw him racing really hard in some east coast events this year and figured he'd be moving up to a bigger team in no time.

Fred said...

"it is only the voluntary poor who understand the true nature of sacrifice."

Reminds me of a similar piece of wisdom from climber Eric Beck:

"At either end of the socio-economic spectrum, there lies a leisure class."

Fred said...

Dogpaw is an example of the now-rare Hippie-Fred. A precursor to the hipster Fred, he is recognized by his eyeglass mirror, encrusted beard and the focused vacancy of a long-term enthusiast of psychedelics.

In his altered state, it can be almost impossible to ride such a Fred off your wheel.

frilly said...

Fred, I have read that Eric Beck quote before. Sucks when you're stuck smack dab in the middle of the spectrum.

Anon 5:45, not so quick. You missed the trikke discussion.

Red, free beer? I'd vote for ya!

Dixie Flatline said...

Check out what the Washington Post said about Bike Messengering last month. To think I cut my teeth as a wee lass in that loverly community only to see it fall apart...damn electronic filing. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/09/14/AR2009091403520.html

Anonymous said...

"it is only the voluntary poor who understand the true nature of sacrifice"

This will go down as your single greatest quote of all time. No contest.

I agree.

Fierce Panites said...

FAIL

Anonymous said...

NICS TAIN

kerry said...

Dogspaw? No way!! My dog is WAY cuter than that guy.
Guess those guys go for bitches. Us lycra clad, geared, nice girls not good enough for the messenger elite( thank god, I like a man who bathes!)

leroy said...

Messenger appreciation day?

Yeesh, I just got the memo a minute ago.

That cost cutting move to carrier pigeons still has a few glitches.

Ride safe all.

And remember, don't shoot the messenger.

Meccanico di Veno said...

Are there strippers in Portland...

Astroluc said...

god... the video anon 2:12 posted is even more heartbreaking...

Asterisk said...

I watched the video also. Heartbreaking.

The death membrane posting by Snob a year ago is a chilling reminder of what we face every day on the road. And if we cross through the membrane, what are the consequences to our families?

Something to think about. Be careful and pray to be lucky.

*

Red neckerson said...

So me and Ricky he ain't as stupid as he looks and I tots the brains then well get Jolene to flash her tits
and well all gets elected president but I don't think Jolene wood want any of the pussy but you never know because getting famous makes you weird like just look at Lindsey lohan

Reed Enwright said...

Beware ... this link may scar you for life

peat said...

wondering if anyone else noticed in the last few seconds of dogpaw's miraculous video his bike chain was a pair of handcuffs attached to his front basket. :)

"Serial Blogger" said...

That last questions link said: clear and available for breeding with approved bitches.

Funny cause I put that same thing in my craigslist ad for "casual encounters"

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