Thursday, April 2, 2009

My Bike, It's Full of Stars! Every Material, Every Color, All the Time

Obviously, many cyclists these days get very excited about crabon fiber. However, there are some riders for whom crabon alone simply isn't enough. After all, when you're out there on your road bike, you want to be confident that yours is the most desirable bike out there. While crabon bikes sure are desirable, what happens if you run into somebody with a titanium bike, or a bike with "exquisite lugwork?" These things too are highly coveted, and the experience can be humbling. Sure, you may also have a titanium bike and an "exquisitely lugged" bike back home in the garage, but without a "My Other Two Road Bikes are Titanium and Exquisitely Lugged Respectively" bumper sticker or jersey how is anybody going to know it? That's why you need one of these:






Independent Fabrication xs, Titanium-Carbon Lugged Frame! - $5000 (Brooklyn)
Reply to: [deleted]
Date: 2009-03-31, 12:08AM EDT

This is the real deal folks. A 100% true original work of art. Museum Quality, brand new condition Ultra Custom Independent Fabrication xs. Titanium Laser Cut Lugs, Carbon Fiber tubes, seat stays and fork.
This frame is truly a one of a kind gem. Hand built to ABSOLUTE perfection, by a former employee. Has been in ads for chris king. The paint job is not even available to customers and if it was it would be an up-charge of nearly $1000. Normally the fork and seat stays are not painted only the tubing, but ALL the carbon is painted on this frame with PPG clear coat with added purple iridescent flake, so it sparkles in the sun transitioning from purple to deep blue to silver. Quite a sight. Comes with the original paper work including in house build sheet. A true collectors item, honored and worshipped, given the treatment of the gods so it is in BRAND NEW condition
Now the specs...
This frame is built with compact geometry 48x53, for someone who would normally ride a 52x53
seat tube length 48cm
top tube: 53
head tube:121
Ht angle: 72
St angle: 73
tt angle: 5
wheelbase: 97.3
Standover: 76.4
Trail: 56.9
Chainstay: 410!!!

Here's the deal. NO LOOKILOOS, HAGGLERS, NON SERIOUS BUYERS. The asking price is $5500 or best REASONABLE and this frame in it's rarity alone is worth $7,000. Look at http://ifbikes.com/frames2/xs.shtml for more reference.
Sorry, the pink chris king head set does not come with the frame. You will the envy of all riding this ridiculous beauty around this spring!!

I have more images I can link you to. Good Luck.




Crabon? Not just carbon, but "purple iridescent flake" crabon. Titanium? Oh yeah--in fact, it's "museum quality," and as any frequenter of museums knows, all the great masters worked in crabon and titanium. Exquisitely lugged? Come on, didn't you read the ad? They're cut with lasers! Still, sometimes even a bike that's crabon, titanium, and exquisitely lugged by lasers all at the same time is still not enough. It needs a pedigree as well. Well, this frameset has that too, because it has been in ads for Chris King. Just imagine the thrill of riding around on your museum-quality sci-fi critanium dream bike and having some lesser cyclist on a plain crabon or ti or lugged bike approach you and ask, "Wow, is that the bike from that Chris King ad? I totally foffed off to that bike." Now that's cycling bliss.

But if you're the type of person who is prone to foffing off in the presence of lugwork, this seller wants you to know he's not running some kind of bicycle peep show or shady "lug and tug." As yo can see, he specifies "NO LOOKILOOS, HAGGLERS, NON SERIOUS BUYERS." So even if you're prepared to pay his full asking price but can't resist also asking if he's heard the one about the guy who walks into a bar with a metal box under one arm and a duck under the other, don't do it, because he'll boot you right out of there. Also, while "lookiloos" is slang for people who look without buying, the word originally referred to baby jackalopes:



That's probably not what he means, but still, if you have one of these you probably shouldn't bring it along.

And if you are sufficiently wealthy and serious and baby jackalope-free to actually acquire this frameset, the first thing you should to is purchase this saddle for it;


At first glance, the graphic on the saddle might look like flaming eyeballs, but anybody who's been to that nasty "Bodies" exhibition knows that they're actually disembodied testicles. I'm not sure why Troy Lee chose to emblazon a bicycle saddle with flaming disembodied testicles, but I guess it's either a placement guide, or else a veiled warning that this saddle is not comfortable. Or maybe flaming disembodies testicles are just the flaming dice of the new millennium.

Speaking of new trends, I have a very bad feeling that a new one is about to pounce like a rabid lookiloo. I recently received in the mail a catalog from a high-end clothing retailer (don't ask me where these things come from--junk mail is like herpes and I guess I must be promiscuous) and while thumbing through it I happened upon this:


Yes, that is somebody skating in a $1,520 designer helmet.

So why am I concerned? There are no bicycles involved, right? Well, just as I must have bought something somewhere with some credit card at some point and wound up with catalog herpes, fashion trends too are like STDs. This is a guy on a skateboard in a fashion retail catalog that also sells expensive jeans. And we know who draws much of their stylistic inspiration from skating and designers and retailers of overpriced trendy clothing. Yes, that's right--urban cyclists. From skating they've appropriated the sneakers and the cinematographic style, and from the world of fashion they've appropriated things like "lookbooks" and "colorways." So it's only a matter of time before someone else with catalog herpes happens upon this and starts marketing fashion helmets to urban cyclists. Look--here's another one:



And this one's $1,750.

With the world of bags and holsters and sneakers and hats and t-shirts already quite crowded, the helmet is the next logical step for trendification. Obviously, not all urban cyclists wear helmets, but many of them do. Even if they don't, they espouse helmet use when the subject comes up. In the fixed-gear world, brakes aren't cool, but helmets are, and here in New York I see brakeless helmeted riders all the time. Really, selling expensive fashion helmets to urban fixed-gear cyclists would be like shooting lookiloos in a laundry hamper. Anybody who can justify spending money on a cycling-specific utility belt or a $290 messenger bag "collabo" will certainly pay way more than that for a helmet, provided it's cool enough. After all, it's for safety, and you can't put a price on safety. (Unless that safety comes in the form of a brake, in which case you can't give it away.) Given the current trend climate of streetwear mixed with retro-chic, I'd imagine this helmet would be some updated take on the old hairnets. That way, they could also display their fitted caps underneath.

In the meantime, from the neck down, cycling fashion seems to have graduated from "colorways" to "color collisions." A number of readers forwarded me this, which comes from some kind of GQ fashion spread:


I'm glad to see some practicality finally coming to urban cycling fashion. As all cyclists know, it's extremely important to give your flaming pants yabbies plenty of breathing room. I'm assuming when it's time to actually get on the bike he just hikes the waist up to his armpits so the crotch doesn't get hung up on the nose of his saddle.

Here are some more hot looks. Actually, it looks like GQ have bypassed "color collisions" and gone straight to "color clusterfucks:"



Also, I'm assuming this photo shoot comes from Europe, so in this case it looks like the "color clusterfuck" look has bypassed the east coast of the United States and gone straight to Boise, Idaho:



Finally, speaking of trends, a reader has forwarded me this interview, which reveals that people are now actually asking their wheelbuilders to place messages on their rims for them:


Yes, putting words on your wheelset is now as integral to the wheelbuilding process as stress relieving.

AYHSMFDT.

196 comments:

aw said...

1st?

aw said...

OH YEAH!

Bluenoser said...

And on borrowed TIME.

Road test to follow.

69

-B

Anonymous said...

dyea...

ringcycles said...

Just outside the flowers!!! no kisses for me.

podiumtard said...

meh

Bluenoser said...

Podium and first comment.

-B

PunsAreSoYesterday said...

AYPSMB

Anonymous said...

OMG!

Rub THIS...

wishiwasmerckx said...

Top ten?

Anonymous said...

top penis

Anonymous said...

Woot! Woot!

mike said...

That bunny is just awesome!

Anonymous said...

I guess you're not going to mention your quote in the Grey Lady yesterday that discusses Rapha. My goodness you are becoming quite the little hypocrite.

Anquetil's Mother said...

who in the world could EVER shoot something as adorable as that lookiloo, even if it were trapped in a laundry hamper??

Fierce Panties OMFG said...

Good morning bicycling community!

Disgruntl Ed. said...

That baby jackalope is cute indeed.

Everything else is a hideous monstrosity.

Anonymous said...

That's a horse of a different colorway

wishiwasmerckx said...

"A true collector's item, honored and worshipped, given the treatment of the gods." For a minute there, I thought that they were writing about my Johnson.

Astroluc said...

Top 20?

Anquetil's Mother said...

that lookiloo is as cute as those mchammer pants for cycling are ugly. really, the model can't even bear to look directly at the camera for fear it may pick up the shame on his face.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 1:13pm,

What's hypocritical? They asked me questions about Rapha and I answered honesly. Obviously the reporters use the quotes they want. I'm pasting the entire email interview below if you're interested.

--BSNYC

1. Rapha as a clothing company -- if you've tried the clothes at all, your thoughts about the quality/value/utility.

I've never actually bought a piece of Rapha clothing, but I have a jacket that was given to me by the company. It's excellent. It's durable, the fit is good, and the pockets are in the right places. But I would not say it's twice as good as a jacket that costs half as much, or four times better than a jacket that costs a quarter as much. For me, a dedicated iPod pocket is not worth more than the price of the iPod itself.

2. Rapha as a brand - your opinion of the of lifestyle/idea they're selling through their clothing, their rider journals, and ventures like those 'Continental teams'

I think they've done a great job of not only evoking cycling history but also capturing a "soulful" aesthetic that appeals to certain riders. As a cyclist, I understand it, but personally I sometimes find it off-putting. It's a little rarified for me. Some people like to feel exclusive, but I'm more like Frank Costanza. "If they don't want me, I don't want them!" I don't want to feel like I need to be worthy of my clothes.

3. Who Rapha speaks to, in your opinion - what kind of rider

There's a certain type of rider who needs to know he only has the best and I think Rapha speaks very clearly to this rider. But I also think that beyond this the Ralpha rider wants to feel like he's in touch with the "spirit" or the "soul" of cycling and that he truly understands the sport. The lifestyle component is as important to him as the technical component. He's also willing to pay for diminishing returns in quality.

4. And given how finicky riders can be on issues of style -- or, in many cases, un-finicky -- why do you think Rapha's had success?

They've been smart to pay attention to how clothing looks off the bike as well as on it, which not a lot of companies do. More importantly, they have been smart to keep their clothing traditional. People will always be infatuated with the history of cycling, and sophisticated riders don't want to wear flashy team replica jerseys or clothing with logos all over it. They don't want people to think he's got money but no sense; they want them to think they have money and sense. It's inconspicuous consumption.

Bear Nardino said...

"Flaming Pants Yabbies..."

...Hilarious

Anquetil's Mother said...

he looks like he has elephantitis of the yabbies

libertyonbikes! said...

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?
MC HAMMER SHORTS?
rub'n something like that
gets you a frame pump through
the front wheel.

don't get me started on the
Syracuse colorway...

WheelDancer said...

What, you cop to a Rapha jacket but don't so much as mention the scarf?

I don't seem to be bothered by the color combinations since I'm colorblind. I wasn't when I started reading the post but I am now...

Steven said...

"capturing a "soulful" aesthetic that appeals to certain riders."
Like Dentists? Yes poster, like dentists!

Anonymous said...

Ridiculous beauty should not cost $5000.

Ridiculous beauty is free.

brighton velo said...

One Ring to Rule them All

Andrew said...

All
You
Haters
Suck
My
Flaming
Disembodied
Testicles?!

Jesus, Snobby, you're going to get me in trouble at work. I actually had someone stop by and ask why I was laughing so loud.

Surly Bastard said...

I'm now rating Snob's posts by the amount of fluids (my own along with not-quite consumed beverages) that I spit all over the keyboard while laughing.

Today was very high - I can't decide whether I should rate it by table spoons, or by the sponge load.

Today was about four Tsps. or two sponges.

Or if you like Six Lookiloos.

Or just funny shit, period.

dammit said...

i hate agreeing with accusations of shark jumping, but that rapha article stung a bit.
man, streetsblog reports someone got a ticket coming off the billyburg bridge!!!that is ace journalism!!

Anonymous said...

i don't get the shark jumping. he said it was overpriced and more for show than anything else. are we all reading the same interview?

libertyonbikes! said...

"It's inconspicuous consumption."

"a critical mass of one."

"Yeah, whatever, just give them
their own month."

"If 'they' really wanted to promote riding to work, they'ld
change Bike to Work Week to
Drive to Work Week."

genius on so many levels.
sometimes you just get sucked into
things because you 'identify'
or want to be identified 'as'
a cyclist. here i'm getting ready
for Bike Month. and just like every
day is a critical mass of one,
every month is bike month.
but,
"inconspicuous consumption"
guess it's everywhere.
fixed gear, hybrids & subcompacts..

Good first column.
to bad the whole mag only lasts one
trip to the crapper.

Willy B. Hardigan said...

Ah, snob. The ironic following you've cultivated so carefully is now ready to turn on you for a moment's clarity, revealed in an honest, and in my opinion, spot-on assessment of an upper-crust brand many might aspire to own.

Fierce Panties OMFG said...

RTMS,

Disembodied? That sounds like something that happened to Casper The Friendly Ghost.

May I suggest "degloved" testicle?

A degloving injury to the scrotum exposes the flaming testicle.

spiff1 said...

I know the guy who owns the IF. He is the forer Pres. of IF and got let go after it's sale. I road with him on that bike in 2007. It is truely a beautiful frame. He must be hard up for cash. If I had the money I'd get it. It has my school colors...

Surly Bastard said...

Snob is the Howard Roark of cycling product reviewers.

Huang and Zinn are Ellsworth Toohey and Guy Francon.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 1:37pm,

Here’s the NYTimes article on Rapha Anonymous 1:13pm mentioned, which quotes me. Those quotes come from the interview I posted above.

--BSNYC

disgruntled said...

same school that taught you how to spell "rode"?

abelgus said...

Snobby I see u waz in the NY times again today!!

Anonymous said...

Thanks Bikesnob. I love reading your blog. You are hilarious.

Jim said...

Yeah, you can call that lookiloo cute if you want... but who do you think set all those disembodied testicles on fire? They didn't just spontaneously combust you know...

Jim said...

Surly Bastard - I always figured Snob was more like the Dagny Taggart of cycling, giving herself ferociously to the cycling community, alive only to her own needs, and taking pleasure without regret.

That, or maybe the Sylvia Plath character in the Bell Jar.

GenghisKhan said...

That lugged Ti crabon fibre guy can't even toss in a $100.00 CJ headset on his $5K frame? Nice selling technique!

spiff1 said...

I learned to spell not type.

former
rode

kale said...

Surly Bastard-

And Gail Wynand would be Lance Armstrong?

That's all I can think of after my creativity received an enema from that Limey GQ thing.

hillbilly said...

oh, c'mon, we all know those quotes in the times just sounded weird coming from someone we all greatly enjoy reading, mainly for his humor, good sense and intelligence. it's not the end of the world, i still love the guy, and this blog is one of the best reads out there, but don't try to defend it as something that doesn't feel a little dirty. "evoking cycling history and capturing a soulful aesthetic?" it's fine, all of us would have done the same, just not as well, but it is a tiny tiny smudge on his credibility

Surly Bastard said...

Well Jim, I don't agree. Both your characters are women, and RTMS is anything but that bleak-ass bitch Plath.

Snob's reviews adhere pretty much to the idea that form should follow function, which is Roark ... or rather Wright.

liz said...

wow, first Teen Vogue, now GQ.

your fixie shame, let me show you it.

Anon 1:37 said...

“Before Rapha, there were two ways to be fashionable in cycling,” said Bill Strickland, the editor at large of Bicycling magazine and until recently the author of its Style Man column. “The first was to be supertechnical, and look like a pro. The other way was to be pure vintage. Rapha created a third way, starting with a premise of ‘How would I like to look in town?’ ”



Really? Rapha created this? This had occurred to no one before Rapha? Only two ways to dress fashionably on a bicycle? C'mon
What a silly article.

Fierce Panites USA said...

and another thing,

speaking of disembodied, that's Gabe Nevins from Paranoid Park rubbin' the double-my-mortgage-payment-yet-half-of-what-my-wheels-cost helmet (DMMPyHOWMWCH).

Gabe Nevins was just slayin' it in that flick. What a great movie.

The now classic trainyard disembodied scene in Paranoid Park picked up where the Bodies exhibit leaves off.

...the opportunity to peer inside yourself, to better understand how your elaborate and fascinating body works, and how you can become a more informed participant...

Surly Bastard said...

Gail Wynand would be the editor of Bicycling Magazine of course ... Lance Armstrong would be Dominique ... but then again that's kinda wrong.

hillbilly said...

yeah, and the founder of rapha sounds the biggest tool in the world, that quote about how his friends would spend 3000 on a bike and then 50 on a shirt making him realize there is a gap there makes fuckall for sense

kale said...

You would think with all the style articles about cycling in the NYT that the streets were filled with models on bikes. If that were the case This Hombre would be in there, somewhere. Is there an Derelicte by Rapha in the werx somewhere?

Anonymous said...

haha. true. why not sell $30 bikes?


http://bicycledesign.blogspot.com/2008/06/cardboard-bike.html

ant1 said...

ant1st!

hillbilly said...

exactly. and his friends probably bought 50,000 dollar cars, so he really could have sold shit for even more. damn did he miss the boat! hey, wait a minute, people buy boats for hundreds of thousands and yet their shoes only cost maybe 200 dollars! it makes no sense!

CommieCanuck said...

$5,500 for a hybrid frame.

No LOOKILOOS, No HAGGLERS, No NON SERIOUS BUYERS. But retards with money up the wazoo are welcome.

Baby jackalopes are delicious on a sourdough bun with French mustard.

Big question: when does RTMS/Style Man start writing for GQ?

Carlos from Philly said...

BikeSnobNYC, this is future BikeSnobNYC.
I figured i'd pass this along:

list things that aren't funny, but distract your readers

1) crabon
2) rub

figured i'd let you know before you got carried away.

yours,
you

CommieCanuck said...

I drive a $25,000 car, wear a $25,00 watch, and pay $25,000 for latte.








That's the way it should be.

Anonymous said...

crabon is very funny. for one it sounds already broken.
"damn crabon!"

for two, the idea of desiring something made of "crabon" makes me giggle (despite the fact that one of my frames is made of crabon)

grog said...

nice snob. milk out the nose.
funnier than a monkelope in heat.

Anonymous said...

Dig the lookiloo.

Luck E. said...

Nice callout on the inverse relationship of money and sense. Wasn't there a graph to accompany that principle?

As for that Independent frame, that's not crabon fibre. It's Robin Williams' body hair under that PPG clearcoat with added purple iridescent flake sandwiched between those ridiculous laser cut ti lugs.

Body hair is the new bamboo. The premium price is obviously attributed to the high cocaine and LSD content of said body hair, which contributes to its self-centered and mind-expanding ride quality.



A

Anonymous said...

hey, remind me what the heck is going on with the jackelopes? I thought they were from WY.

Critical Ass said...

Since when has George Michael been riding fixies?

Anonymous said...

to Anon 1:58 PM

Writers love dualities, and dialectics, not complex multivariate systems. They're much harder to write, and to quote. for example: There are many ways to be stylish on a bike, the two common themes are, *not* wearing a Primal jersey, and the faster you ride the more obvious the logos must be.

See how easy that was?

Admiral Crunch said...

Laser cut lugs are good, but where can I get lugs cut by frickin' sharks with frickin' lasers on their heads?

In the meantime, I will continue to rock/rub/run the exciting look/colorway of camo shorts over lycra, Mountain Equipment Co-op jerseys and SPD shoes.

But what do I know, I was abandoned by my parents in the late 80s and raised by a pack of roving messengers.

Anonymous said...

What I never understood about Rapha was why they would put "wheelsucker" on the ass of their bibshorts.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Hillbilly @ 1:55pm:

I'd just like to assert that I have no credibility to smudge.

--RTMS

CommieCanuck said...

Critical...about the same time he started shitting his pants, apparently.

hillbilly said...

damn if you ain't got me there, but i think you are confusin the two of us, and there are plenty of people out there who would disagree and what they heard is that rapha appeals to cyclist who want to know they have the best. which i think is actually purty darn clever, as it's not saying it is the best, but... i'm a music critic and am used to getting ragged on for this kinda crap, and no credibility is the usual defense, as exemplified by Jon Stewart vs mad money moron.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry it took this long:

"As yo can see, he specifies "NO LOOKILOOS, HAGGLERS . . . ."

Snobby, I didn't know you were from Philly!

Anonymous said...

Mystery Science Theater used to do the same thing as BSNYC, but a bit better.

Just sayin'

-and sprayin'

Anonymous said...

That Jackalope is a total fake. Everyone knows that baby jackalopes only have spikes - not a full rack.

Anonymous said...

Also, what's the big deal about Rapha? Yes, they make really nice stuff. Yes, they also make stupidly expensive stuff. They're just emblematic of what happened over the past 5 - 10 years -- a profusion of luxury goods which are created with an idea of exclusivity, whether through price or scarcity.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Marvelous Marvin Hagler was interested in that frame, but the rcaist bastard seller plainly specified, "NO HAGLERS."

BikeSnobNYC said...

Carlos from Philly,

Please ask future BikeSnobNYC if the economic crisis is over where he is. Also, can people fly?

--RTMS

Anonymous said...

The Dominique to Snob's Roark

bikesgonewild said...

..."four out of five dentists surveyed now say they would choose independent fabrication over the other 'leading' brand"...dental hygiene magazine...

bikesgonewild said...

..."Anon 2:53pm said...
Everyone knows that baby jackalopes only have spikes - not a full rack."
...

...sorry, pal...that's just the males...female jackalopes, even the babies, have a full rack...
...those are the facts...

...just sayin'...

VaticDart said...

So how many years will it be before cycling aesthetics cycles back around to the grunge/homeless look? Will hordes of people be dumpster diving behind clothing companies looking for the grungiest swatch to make their rain jackets from? Will Rapha be selling $150 rope belts? Will pants be available in grease stained collabos (different chain rings)? Will baseball caps be sold as cycling accessories? Oh crap, that's already happening.

Anonymous said...

Even Shakespeare gotta get paid; the only reason I could stand working at a bike shop was getting to take other people's wildly expensive bikes for a spin after a repair or tune-up. Let the man enjoy his spoils; at least he shares it with us.

bother yam said...

That first "Fixie Up" picture needs the Fark squirrel in it. Too bad my Gimp-Fu sucks. Eric K?

http://www.fark.com/farq/about.shtml

Wes said...

Careful now - those lookiloos sometimes shed their antlers and turn bad.

http://hamous.org/images/lepus.jpg

carlos said...

"A true collectors item, honored and worshipped"
This has got to be an april fools joke. WTF is that frame a golden calf!?

Anonymous said...

The saddle hits close to home with its embedded eyeballs. Mounting my bike after having come out of the packie I heard a shout from a car window. "Damn, girl. I wish my face was your bicycle seat!" Bleh.

Udder said...

Hints For Independent Fabricators To Increase Sales Of Their Really Expensive Bicycle Frames:

1) Change your name. The words "independent" and "fabrication" fight each other, like "freethinking" and "assembly line" do.

2) Design a logo that doesn't look like press-on type for a garage sale sign.

3) Don't advertise that machines do your most critical work (laser lugs).

4) Leave the metal flake paint to Schwinn Stingrays.

Anonymous said...

That Independent looks kind of like the Alan frames from the late 70's.

AoK said...

Check out my article on Rapha: Cycling with style!

Find out the latest in kool, from fashion to food at http://ambassadorofkool.blogspot.com/
http://www.twitter.com/ambassadorok

masshole, aka ambassadork said...

Sorry, I posted under the wrong name and the wrong link a second ago:

http://www.twitter.com/ambassadork

Anonymous said...

BikeSnobNYC, today I disassembled, cleaned, greased, and repacked the headset on my vintage Schwinn, and all the while with a smirk on my face. I am very excited but I had no one else to share this with that would understand. Oh, and my bike seems to be unaffected by The Fixed Plague, as I continue to rub all ten gears.

Anonymous said...

Anon 3:58-

Foffing will make you go blind

Anonymous said...

Bikesnob,

It appears the intent of your responses was not clearly related in the article that introduces your quote with "Rapha has managed to impress even the toughest of bike-world critics, including the anonymous blogger Bike Snob NYC".

Your full quotes indicate your issues with Rapha, albeit it in a balanced and considered way--quite different than your typical handling of them.

That said, I guess I am confusing hypocrisy with on the one hand you being sincere (in the NY Times article) and on the other (namely, on this blog) you being ironic.

Deepest apologies. You don't dismiss products on this blog and then support them in NY Times interviews. You just dismiss them differently.

Anonymous 1:13

CommieCanuck said...

Oh, so sad, and just before Easter.

Anonymous said...

Surly,

Understandably, Prolly hates The Fountainhead.

Lance as Dominique is just weird. Nice one.

Anonymous said...

Surly Bastard, it is fine to call yourself names, but you might have a second thought about what you call others.

Perhaps you hate women, or the clinically depressed. Perhaps Plath is not your cup of tea.

Bitch.

Anonymous said...

Whadehellsa matter wiff you people? Lemme in on the jackalope thing GD-it!

Jim said...

I'm with Anon 4:29, Surly Bastard. Don't call Sylvia Plath nasty names, or she might get depressed or go off and kill herself or something.

Anonymous said...

So..the point of Rapha products is so that the well-heeled cyclist won't look ridiculous? Did anyone tell the dude "rocking" the ridiculous cycling suit shown in the NYT photo? That right there is far more ridiculous than spandex.

The Dutch/Germans/Scandinavians are rolling around on the floor laughing at us buying street clothes specifically made for cycling...

Surly Bastard said...

Whaa? Hey, I come with my own built-in disclaimer, dude, er, dudette ...

(Trying to deflect scorn) How about Commie killing that defenseless Easter-Jackalope? I'm thinking he's making some kind of anit-Christian statement since the Easter-Jacklope is the number two Christian symbol right behind the Santa Claws Cat. And by the way that full-rack might mean it's a female Jackalope ... think about that you Bastard HATER!

Anonymous said...

The Independent is made from kit parts! A computer-controlled machine makes the lugs; -- the stays, tubes, etc., come out of a box with "Reynolds" stamped on the side; then it's all GLUED TOGETHER! Where's the exquisite craftsmanship in that?! Parlee, Crumpton, Time (e.g. high-end, lugged carbon fiber) -- it's a scam.

Surly Bastard said...

Thanks Jim. That's a big load off my mind. I couldn't live with myself if that ...

Beautiful ...
Intelligent ...
Thoughtful ...
Caring ...
Human being ...

... did anything that would screw her kids up for life.

bikesgonewild said...

...anon 4:43pm...being anonymous obviously you're not a card carrying member...

...we don't wanna put all our eggs in one basket...i think commiecanuk showed exactly what can happen if ya do...

...& the TIME is not right for INDEPENDENT FABRICATIONS...& i can't reveal what that means, either...

Wes said...

bgw - stop it - you'll make him all HUFFY.

hillbilly said...

yall SHOGUN do this again?

frilly said...

Snobby, Congratulations on the Times article. Everybody needs to back off on questioning your credibility. They're missing the point--this humble scribe has once again made it into the New York Times!

And to some of the people bitching, I have to ask, have you never altered your tone to match the audience? Altered your tone not the message?

Well done Snob!

sprider said...

That post was just "crabonaceous"!
(It's a real word, look it up)

jolene said...

snawb jus needs to lern the suttle art of the soundbite

boy howdy

hoo nows whut i done sed an dun when i gets me some soco in me i starts flappin my gums

WJJO said...

I like that Rapha suit there Nancy Boy!

Jay said...

I don't find anything wrong with more or less creating inside jokes with your readers. Crabon is funny. It was also fun trying to explain why it's funny to someone who doesn't read the blog. fun fun funny

red neckerson said...

what im saying is that if you takes a oxycontin and wash it down with a keystone and then like a dummass go mountain biking there aint nothing good thats gonna happen and thats what im saying

especially if you might build up an immunity to that stuff it aint getting rid of all the hurtin thats for certain because i feel like a peace of french fried dog shit

Wes said...

Have y'all seen this? First example of an acknowledged decorative brake fitment. Doesn't even have a cable, nor lever nor hood to hang onto.

http://www.fixedgeargallery.com/2009/apr/1/Kevin.htm
boulder colorado
old 1980's peugeot carbolite frame
everything is stock except for the wheelset, the saddle and the front brake
the back brake is non functional, its just there for show

Ooooo Laaazorzz said...

Pew Pew!!!

urchin said...

Surely it's tough trying to uphold an anonymous public image if you can't see the final edit out of your replies. You're just burying the lead... reasonable, somewhat complementary thing, then the left hook truth. Even plussed journalists have trouble reading past the first sentence or two.

That GQ spread stepped in some 80s and didn't wipe its feet..

NPJ

Anonymous said...

$5000? I think the fork is worth $50, so...
I could get a mint 944 for that

Ari said...

What exactly is "Crabon"? And how does it differ from the better know "Carbon"?

Bluenoser said...

It's made from crustatians.

-B

Anonymous said...

Crabon is made of your mom's (fierce) panties.


OOOH BURN

Bluenoser said...

Snobbie,

Desperate companies in desperate times.

Keep on writing.

-B

Anonymous said...

What does Lance's cock taste like?

Jim said...

>>>Red Neckerson Said:

>>>what im saying is that if you takes a oxycontin and wash it down with a keystone and then like a dummass go mountain biking there aint nothing good thats gonna happen and thats what im saying

But you tell that to kids nowadays, and they don't believe you.

Anonymous said...

At a loss as to which bike is ugliest - the "lugged" (more like luggaged) crabon one or the preppy-vomit hued one.

Luck E. said...

The answers to these pressing questions (and many more) can be found in the 477 archived posts from BSNYC.

Don't be a lazy waste of commenting space; do the work and read!

In the immortal words of AnnaZed,
"Do try to keep up or I WILL rip you a new one."


A

Mister Yabbie Pants said...

Oh, that AnnaZed is just so sexy!

mr.complaint said...

Well, I rode home as fast as I could. I know I rode faster than 20MPH, and I'm sorry to say that my clothes did not transform into a Rapha suit, no did my riding partner become Posh Spice.

How disappointing.

Anonymous said...

there is clearly a range of 'custom' from 'factory' to' ultra' and the first thing you would buy for the museum piece would be a cane creek headset. that would be ironic on the chris king photo model

Seanywonton said...

I think NY Times did a decent job of summing up the nuances of your honest views on Rapha. It's got to be incredibly hard to distill a few lines of print from an interview and still capture the complexity of what that person says. They didn't do too bad, considering the space given.

urchin said...

in defense of a few words:

crabon gets my vote--I get happier every time I say it.

'fabrication' has nothing to do with an assembly line, if you've ever done any. It's just 'makin' stuff' with heavy equipment....

The Winter Gentleman said...

Those lugs are teh suck. And the bike looks like packaging for Mach 3 razors. Pass.

Anonymous said...

AYHSMFDT...also a great knuckle tat.

Anonymous said...

Anon 9:16-

Split the difference and put half CKHS on top, with a Cane Creek on the bottom (because they have better seals) and throw a hand-polished Ti cap on the top for good measure. Now that would be an ironic museum piece.

Anonymous said...

re times article:

the anonymous bike snob... funny his actual name has been mentioned twice on other blogs...

Anonymous said...

The GQ photo spread did propose a use for the drastically downward pointing saddle: it's the ideal lounging bike. It's like a mobile barcalounger, only with feet on the floor and the lumbar region of your back so comfortably supported by the saddle you can spends hours in the saddle, without pedaling, just leaning. It's ideal for a day long photo shoot.

Grumpy Gnome said...

" ... Crabon? Not just carbon, but "purple iridescent flake" crabon."

You misspelled crabon.

Paul Bowen said...

I'll take their word for it about the materials and build quality of that frame but a thing of beauty it isn't; museum quality fugly is what it is.

Lug and tug - lulzah!

Paul Bowen said...

Can I ask - how are we pronouncing crabon? Is it crab-on or cray-bon?

Wes said...

Paul Bowen

We are individuals. We pronounce it how we want. Also, don't worry too much about it - I can't hear your typing.

Anonymous said...

7 cycles is weak. They build trash.

Paul Bowen said...

I know you can't Wes but I want to use the word as part of my daily discourse and don't wish to be snubbed by other BSNYC readers because of an easily avoided faux pas. It's difficult enough when you ride a Brompton without putting other obstacles in the path to acceptance.

Mike Hunt said...

Anybody else catch the BBC show on labiaplasty last night? The poor girl painfully removed a large portion of her genitals because they "didn't look right".

It made these hipster kids and their fashion-at-all-costs attitudes look well-adjusted (and kinda weak) by comparison.

Wes said...

Brompton, Paul? You should be able to garner more respect with that than if you turned up at a BSNYC convention on a fixed recumbent with a crabon Easy Shatter (TM) front wheel and one of those pant cuff retainer doohickeys.

Also, I will not judge openly.

Paul Bowen said...

Thanks Wes, your assurance that my Brompton is more worthy of respect than an imagined perfect storm of dorkitude will put a spring in my step for the rest of the day!

Wes said...

I aim to please.

Crabon said...

The o is silent

yogisurf said...

I should not have been drinking coffee when I read "give your flaming pants yabbies plenty of breathing room". It almost came out by nose.

Anonymous said...

Pronunciation of crabon differs from north to south and urban to rural areas but it really doesn't reflect on the soul of the rider within.

In the south they say cray-bn.

Anonymous said...

I'm so gonna rub the quiz.

ant1 said...

I'm pre-rubbing right now.

7sp said...

So where exactly does a lug end and a crabon S&S coupling begin?

juliasets said...

HAMMERTIME!

kale said...

I'm rocking right now so i can rub later and not run out of awesome sauce for the quiz.

kale said...

...and Ant1, stop your formicating.

wishiwasmerckx said...

Mike Hunt, piss fenders or bike fenders. It's all the same to this crowd, eh?

Bill said...

channeling taylor phinney and axl, ie, people half my age, i am preparing to, ahem, 'slay' the quiz?

Anonymous said...

There are consistently over 100 comments/day on this blog now. Congrats.

hillbilly said...

thanks, always nice to be recognized for, oh, er, uh, you weren't talking to me. how embarrassing.

Confused said...

My private Idaho.

"My Volume Cutter, 53cm. Shred time."

I think the bike is built from cheese, hopefully gourmet cheese.

TheTye said...

Anonymous 1:13-

if you actually read his comment, there is nothing hypocritical about it. you are allowed to approve of something well made without committing trendkill

glass. said...

oh my god, it's full of stars! is this a reference to 2001? just got it, if so. if not, i'm way off base but loving the longer topic lines you have been rocking/rubbing lately.

s.

Anonymous said...

Dear TheTye,

I did read his comment(s)--both in the NY Times and here. Clearly you haven't read all of mine.

But I have read yours (several times) and I have to say I have no idea what you mean. It seems to mimic English syntax and a logical progression, but you lose me at the end.

Let me explain my understanding of hypocrisy, so alarmed question marks don't pop up all over.

When you use a good deal of your blog to denigrate a company and its products (i.e. using a Rapha scarf for avoiding touching unpleasant objects), and then in a NY Times article your quote is prefaced by the introduction that the BikeSnob NYC approves of Rapha products that constitutes a hypocrisy to me. It shouldn't be too much of a logical leap to see that.

That said, upon reading BikeSnob's entire correspondence with the reporter, I can see that the reporter took some liberties in characterizing his quote.

So, I commented again that what I recognized as hypocrisy was more akin to be equally dismissive of Rapha but in a different way.

Damning with faint praise (i.e. the rear pockets are in the right place) may have had the same ironic charm that we can find here on BikeSnob's blog, but may have been misconstrued by the reporter as in fact a worthy quality (in fact, many bike jerseys can't seem to perfect this simple trick).

But perhaps the most alarming bit of all this is that it appeared to me that the BikeSnob was not going to mention his quote in the NY Times--the paper of record.

Curious, don't you think? Considering his self-acknowledged fascination with all things related to him why would he neglect his mention in it?

When I see the BikeSnob in his frugal and exquisitely practical Fruit of the Loom tee-shirt hammering a way in Prospect Park, I will ask him.

Anonymous said...

Too bad IF now seems like one of the bike makers for dentists. At one time they were the plucky survivors of the Fat Chance/Serotta clusterfuck but now their market is just trust-fund types?
Next issue---Crabon? I thought it was "carpet-fiber" or if you want to be cool like the Rapha folks, "carpet-fibre"

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Anonymous said...

溪頭杉林溪
南投飯店
南投旅遊
南投住宿
杉林溪住宿
鹿谷
堆高機
軸承
軸承
日月潭民宿
座椅電梯
樓梯升降椅
升降椅
植牙
人工植牙
微創植牙
植體
牙根
收驚
收驚方法
五路財神廟
財神廟
關帝廟
網路拜拜
補財庫方法
堆高機
托板車
中翻英翻譯
英文校稿
英文論文
雷射雕刻
大陸新娘

Anonymous said...

大陸新娘
網路開店
高雄飛梭雷射
高雄隆乳
塑膠袋
OPP袋
背心袋
顯微鏡
放大鏡
望遠鏡
天文望遠鏡
餐飲加盟
空壓機
空壓機
CNC Machine
助聽器
和合術
斬桃花
招桃花
合和術
分手挽回
月下老人
招財方法
四面佛
開運
補財庫
台中室內設計
台中住宿
逢甲住宿
高雄婚禮佈置
舞台燈光音響

Anonymous said...

義肢
義肢
阿里山高山茶
阿里山茶
阿里山烏龍茶
充電控制器
風力發電機
太陽能系統
LED路燈
追蹤器
衛星追蹤器
徵信器材
反偷拍
監視系統
喜餅禮盒
喜餅推薦
結婚喜餅
彌月禮盒
彌月蛋糕
銑刀
物料架
層架
手推車
消毒殺菌
環境消毒
捆包機
自動捆包機
自動打包機
束帶機
大陸新娘
大陸新娘
塑膠袋
手提袋
購物袋
背心袋
包裝機
磁鐵
塑膠齒輪
攻牙機
太陽能發電
塑膠成型
太陽能路燈
太陽能庭園燈
避雷針
溪頭民宿
溪頭住宿
妖怪村民宿
妖怪村住宿
妖怪村
職業工會
工會健保
公所健保
工會勞保
能量屋
檜木桶

Anonymous said...

蒸足桶
三溫暖烤箱
蒸腳桶
林內熱水器
櫻花熱水器
塑膠射出
塑膠模具
塑膠射出成型
集合式電表
集合式電表
海外婚紗攝影
戶外婚禮
婚禮顧問
婚禮顧問公司
婚禮記錄
婚禮佈置
會場佈置
汽車隔熱紙
大樓隔熱紙
光學玻璃
玻璃加工
玻璃鑽孔
堆高機
安養中心
高雄室內設計
隱形矯正
無痛植牙
U型溝
蓄水池
溪頭民宿
溪頭住宿
妖怪村民宿
妖怪村住宿
妖怪村
重庆消防在线
重庆代办消防
重庆代办消防
重庆消防代办
重庆消防公司
重庆过消防
重庆消防设计
重庆消防咨询
重庆代办消防验收
重庆消防设备安装施工
重庆消防验收