Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Bicycles and Their Counterparts In Nature

Most of us at some point or another find it necessary to delude ourselves into believing there's some kind of order and symmetry in the Universe. Whatever. But one interesting aspect of this is the Platonic Ideal. Now, I don't think every piece of crap here has some perfect counterpart in some other world we can't visit. But I do think that every bicycle I see has some perfect living counterpart out there in the natural world--a non-bicycle doppelganger. Here are some examples:


Anonymous said...

BAM! Another bash on the bicycle culture. Good times.

And I have to ask, what is the bicycle set up of the mighty author of this site? I know it's going to be hard to actually fess' up to what you ride since you are SO talented at blowing holes in EVERYTHING...but let's get a fair playing field here.

Thanks and keep up the shooting gallery.

.: Chris

Anonymous said...

Hilarious! I have to give serious props for the green bike with the bandanna. Now I know the whole argument about no brakes, and I admit I like to take my brake off now and then, it can be free and fun. This being said, if you're going to go without a brake, you should try getting a chain. It's tough to ride without a chain, thought you should know.


Seattle Matt

BikeSnobNYC said...


Another commenter asked me that awhile back and I posted a reply, which for better or worse I'll paste below.

As far as levelling the playing field, I cravenly intend to leave it tilted waaay in my favor.


(pasted from previous post)
Ha! Well, as a cyclist I never thought anybody would ever care about what I ride. But I'm flattered and it's a fair question.

As you noticed, though some of my preferences are obvious, I don't refer specifically to what I myself use. This isn't out of fear of ridicule or anything like that. The reason is that I communicate in derision and derision only--I prefer not to "endorse" or speak positively about specific products. There's enough of that on the web as it is. Plus, what I ride (or what anybody rides) isn't important. The point is the motivation behind the choice of ride and equipment. It's when the motivation behind that choice is vanity that my sensor gets tripped.

But at the same time, I don't want to be too evasive, and like any cyclist I'd like nothing more than to discuss my equipment. So I'll just say this: I have four bikes. (I'd probably have more, but this is New York, and there are spacial constraints.) Two of them are geared, one is a single-speed, one is a fixed-gear. One is carbon, one is aluminum, and two are steel. None is exotic and the manufacturers are not esoteric, though of the four the road bike is the one that would most be considered "high end." They all use more or less boringly conventional wheels and components.

Hope this helps. I'm very pleased to have given you some laughs.


GhostRider said...

Awww..c'mon...don't be dissin' the otters by comparing them to recumbents! Otters are cool -- while recumbents are mostly just silly, designed for cyclists who dread the thought of leaving their recliners at home

sumadis said...

pictures worth 1000 words. each.


Stuggy said...

OMFG! Trek Madone SSL and Sonny Crockett! Wait, wait, lemme get up off the floor. Oh, crap, my sides are hurting, I can't look at those pics again, or I'll be back there ROFLMAO...

Toto said...

Wait a minute. So you're admitting that recumbents are bicycles?

Anonymous said...

Don't knock Don, there are others way more unworthy than him!

mander said...

the matching nandannas! Oh! my gut! :D

dan said...

So how long until we see a fixie without handlebars? Maybe with an oury stretched over the stem?

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

sirrah, way to sidestep chris' question. was your plan to provide just enough ambiguous information to make the reader think you had really answered the question? your explanation of your bikes describes nearly every bike on the planet, including the ones you enjoy criticizing. you are well aware that every bike has its weaknesses, so don't argue that your failure to describe your bike has any more to do with not endorsing products than being afraid of what others might think of you.

anon with a

trek fixed gear
bianchi single speed
roadmaster single speed mtb
schwinn tandem
elf bmx

Anonymous said...

When you break your wrist, you may wish you had a recumbent. If one could only mount a beer fridge and TV, all would be good during football season.

filtersweep said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Too effing funny. I've been wondering how long it would take those that are tweaked to start posting whiny complaints about blah blah blah... I don't care. As I see it, bsnyc is ridiculing the owners of these bikes, rather than the bikes themselves. If you are getting all twisted up about it, stop looking in this particular mirror. As for me, my new question when purchasing any cycling equipment will be "WWBSNYVD?"

Anonymous said...

err... WWBSNYCD?

Anonymous said...

God bless you, Bike Snob.

Matt said...

Perhaps you could make RIDESNOB yellow wrist bands? Or maybe DayGlo green? And, I know, I know!, we could build our own wheels and put them on the hub to impress the chickz!

Kerry said...

The missing twin for that first bike should really be a banana slug: http://meanderthal.typepad.com/dope/images/banana_slug.jpg

Hey Chris, who dubbed you Lord Protector of Cycling Culture? Either laugh and enjoy the creative rants or go ride your bike and quit complaining.

Aaron said...

Best post yet.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the some what shadowed answer. I was just curious.

And in no way do I think I'm Lord Blah Blah Blah. I'm sure I'm the guy that everyone chuckles about as I ride by.

I own one bike, which is fixed, that I use to commute and have fun on when I can. I own far too few bikes or have the any interest in becoming part of any 'culture'. I'm just a guy who has no problem with my track bike and was curious what bike the author rode.

I was being honest when I said keep it up...this is damn funny stuff.

I can certainly laugh at myself, and do...and I find those in spandex and claiming that they are part of a 'culture' rarely can.

Take care and ride for fun.

.: Chris

sorelegs said...

Waaay too funny. The otters, they are coming to get me. They are going to poke me in the calf with their little feet.

OMG I could not stop laughing had to go away from the page to calm down! Almost puked when I saw Don/Trek Thank you bsnyc.

Tim said...

We're all laughing... until our bike shows up here!

Martijn said...

F***ing brilliant!

Anonymous said...

Speaking for the 'bent rider community, we prefer to be compared to walrussesess (walrii?) than otters.


Lunatic Biker said...

Sonny Crocket, awesome.

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