You've had a long week, I've had a long week, so I'm going to spare you the quiz and dismiss you early.
But first, click on over to Outside and read my latest column, which is all about using your bike to do stuff:
Even the most "epic" Fondo, gravel-grinder, or bikepacking expedition isn't so much a feat as it is a vacation, and the true cycling accomplishment is Getting Shit Done.
And if you're not tired of me yet (as if), when you're done with that you can hop on over to the Bike Forecast and read all about how I nearly died of heatstroke in a botched attempt at day-drinking:
Notice the deer is wearing one of those performance-enhancing ear tags:
Speaking of the Turbine (as I was yesterday), do you notice anything?:
No? Look closer:
Here's a pop quiz:
The Turbine nasal-dilating athletic performance system resembles:
--A penis
--A uterus and ovaries
--The Ebola virus
--All of the above
Small, medium, and large sizes indeed.
Okay, you're now free to go. Enjoy the weekend, ride safe, and enjoy riding safely this weekend.
Yours and so forth,
--Wildcat Rock Machine
Here's a pop quiz:
The Turbine nasal-dilating athletic performance system resembles:
--A penis
--A uterus and ovaries
--The Ebola virus
--All of the above
Small, medium, and large sizes indeed.
Okay, you're now free to go. Enjoy the weekend, ride safe, and enjoy riding safely this weekend.
Yours and so forth,
--Wildcat Rock Machine
Podiodio and read it!
ReplyDeletepodiddly and i read it too!
ReplyDelete4th and I read THREE days of posts.
ReplyDeleteEveryone must have wrecked at the start. Enjoyed the utility cycling piece in Outside, Bike Forecast was cool. Are the ear tags to denote neutered deer?
ReplyDeleteAlthough many days the NYC and Trumpland forecasts are the same, ours are always hot, with a side of hot. Enjoy the cool day.
Won't the Turbine nose expander stretch out your nostrils, leaving them saggy and droopy?
ReplyDeleteWho wants that?
Top Ten!!!
ReplyDeleteGetting ready for the big annual Seattle to Portland (STP) event ride this weekend. Just finished packing my briefcase of courage.
ReplyDeletetop ten, I'll take it.
ReplyDelete"... fighting the urge yell "Go fuck yourself!" ..."
ReplyDeleteHow high up the Outside writer's hierarchy does one have to be before they assign you a copy editor?
How high up the Outside writer's hierarchy does one have to be before they assign ONE a copy editor?
DeleteNice Outside article, Wildcat.
ReplyDeleteI'm now off to read about your day drinking, as a bike ride/beer drinking collabo is right in my wheelhouse.
I utilized my time and read your posts and article and still made it under twenteen.enjoy the suds!
ReplyDeleteI think "Deer Face" could have been a possible answer to the question.
ReplyDeleteIs it possible to attach an Extra-Cycle to a Y-Bike? That would be beautiful. Still waiting for the return of the "Cockie" awards. Vive le bar ends!
ReplyDeleteFinished wading through War & Peace (Russian authors sure can pontificate), weeded the weed garden (each individual can have 12 plants here in Califunya), brushed the GF's teeth (I'm not saying with what), started watching the Bastille Day Stage (will a citizen of the nation that gave us Freedom Fries win?). And somehow I'm still in the top 20!!! Merde! Meanwhile, our Fearless Leader is over in Freedom Friesville and he says their President's wife is hot, or did he say "hot, hot" - maybe he'll enter her in one of his beauty pageants. So far no media reports of him grabbing her by a piece of anatomy, and if there were, it would be Fake News anyway. National holiday in France today, maybe The Donald can squeeze in a round of holiday golf.
ReplyDeletePoka dots in my sleep, poka dots on the tv, poka dots on my kids face, damn what's with all the poka dots?
ReplyDeleteI don't mean to brag, but the last time I attended one of my dog's karaoke parties, I woke up with one of those performance enhancing ear tags.
ReplyDeleteMy dog said I won it, but my memory of the evening is a little fuzzy.
Ride safe all!
Forget your nose getting baggy... if you're not careful, your whole face can turn baggy
ReplyDeleteHey, that is the first Outside article I have ever read that didn't suck! You truly are making the world a better place.
ReplyDeleteRecumbabe would look good in an ear tag.
ReplyDeleteRIDE NICE
No ear tag for me! I'm going to buck the trend.
ReplyDeleteAll those kids in the bucket of the cargo bike look big enough to be riding their own bikes. I guess they would be tough to wrangle and keep from riding into traffic, not to mention lost suburban street cred. I bet the kids all have last names for first names...and at least on named Liam.
ReplyDeleteAnother benefit of rehabilitating that forgotten 26" hardtail for cargo and everyday work... really good tires can be had for like $9. It's going to be some time until 27.5+ tires are in that price range-- ie. when the norm becomes 36ers or maybe swings back to 26".
ReplyDeleteActually looks more like a baboon's face
ReplyDeletefinally
ReplyDeletebaker's 2 dozen podium
and after a long dry spell, got 100% on the quiz.
not sure this counts. sitting here watching tdf. but i did pedal to princess' house to babysit.
So few comments. Fake blog. Sad.
ReplyDeleteWhat I learned from today's TdF:
ReplyDeleteTony Martin and Dan Martin are NOT one and the same person. Tony used to ride for Quick-Step, Dan now rides for Quick-Step.
I am told that their grandfather, Martin Martin, was the best cyclist of them all...
jesus,this has become totalky shiite.
ReplyDeleteIt's a fine line between influencer and influenza
ReplyDeleteHa what a hoot. They really are riding around in pickups shooting doe deer in Hastings on Hudson. With a tranquilizer dart, that is. Then injecting it with a birth control compound and tagging it with the yellow ear tag. So now you know. News articles didn't say anything about slapping a Trump sticker on their hindquarters.
ReplyDeleteLooks like an IUD
ReplyDeleteMe predicting Knobby covers Urán, Urán's French tour today. Velowpneus actually commented on his hairstyle change today.
ReplyDelete#whatpressureareyouexerting
In the cycling competition, It is good to read about some useful and precious technique that helpful for me all the players who are looking online help. I truly excited to visit this blog post because you explain each and every angles in details. Thank you
ReplyDeleteOh, great, your article gives me useful information and a fresh perspective on the subject.
ReplyDelete