Thursday, April 18, 2019

The Way We Were

So this morning my phone did that weird "Black Mirror"-type thing where it tells you that you have a "memory" and then sends you down a Proustian nostalgia hole by showing you a bunch of photos it has somehow figured out are significant--and as it happens the photos that my phone chose were from a Gran Fondon't some two years back:


A look back into my archives (if it weren't for my phone and my blog I'd remember absolutely nothing) reveals that I billed this particular ride as the "BSNYC BOOMB!* Pre-Fondon't Ride," "BOOMB" being an acronym for "Beers on Old Man Brooks," because we all got beers at the Bronx Alehouse afterwards and I stuck Brooks with the bill.

I then did an extensive write-up for the Brooks Blog, which didn't appear until October, and when it did finally appear they deleted almost all the photos because, as it was explained to me, "the brand have been pushing for using high quality images within our blog articles and the website in general" and "a lot of the pics were not quite up to the new 'standard' as it were."

Of course asking me to blog for you and expecting good pictures is like buying a pet badger and thinking your couch is going to stay intact, but the fact is that there was some staff turnover at Brooks between the time I started blogging for them and the time I got that email, and I suspect the new people didn't really "get" me.  (Or, more likely, they got me perfectly well and realized my shitty sense of aesthetics was fucking up their blog.)

Also, now that I think of it, if I recall correctly a precondition of the ride was that everyone had to take pictures along the way and give them to me to use in the Brooks Blog, so I don't even think it was my shitty photography.  (Not that it matters--though I thought that was a fun element, and it's too bad Brooks didn't appreciate it.)

None of this is to say that I have any hard feelings.  Sure, they really did fuck up what had been a pretty good blog post, but you don't last as a semi-professional curator of words if you're precious about what you write.  And of course Brooks and I did continue to work together.  In fact, since they weren't into my shitty photos, they went so far as to have my next post professionally illustrated:


Still, my stock-in-trade is rambling ride narratives illustrated by shitty photography (whether by me or others), and they wanted me to blog on specific themes that they suggested, so it never really came together.

I still love Brooks and Brooks saddles, and I'm sure they still love me too, because who doesn't?

All of this is to say that the derailleur failures:


And token gravel sections:


And forced dismounts:


And fixie riders feeling justifiably pleased with themselves for braving the OCA on skinny tires:


And of course beer:


Has, until now, been lost in the mists of time.

In fact, it's all enough to make me consider curating another Fondon't, just for old time's sake.

I'll keep you posted.

24 comments:

huskerdont said...

On a somewhat related note, did Outside decide your "shitty sense of aesthetics was fucking up their blog" so no Eroica post never? AFAF

wishiwasmerckx said...

Podium?

Schisthead said...

Old man Brooks, yet another victim of those sailing the accountantseas....

Sad, but topical.

Skidmark said...

High-quality images only, if you please.

Anonymous said...

Podiating, yo.

Sour Grapes said...

Now he is just teasing us, holding back the Cali Erotica post.

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...Gran-fun-do-it

On the Lam said...

"...my phone did that weird "Black Mirror"-type thing where it tells you that you have a "memory"..."

My phone has never reminded me out of the blue of a good time I had in the past, but several subpoena servers have.

Watch and Camera Guy said...

Podium?

rural 14 said...

ant 2nd!
podium!

etc

I will venture down from the north country.

Will Leroy's dog attend?

BikeSnobNYC said...

huskerdont,

As I understand it Outside are planning to run the Eroica story next week, but of course that's at their discretion.

--Tan Tenovo

Harper Collins said...

Oh, I didn't know that they exercised editorial discretion over your columns.

I always just assumed that Outside Magazine was published by your Dad.

Anonymous said...

Funny - this made me realize your were "curating" all-road rides before "all-road" was a thing. Now that everyone is doing it, and of course the industry is pumping out "all-road" bikes as fast as they can make them, it must be time to move on. May be time to attack by going off the back again.

Anonymous said...

Random "memories", yet another good reason not to get an electric toy phone when the cash can be better spent on bike stuff!

Love Brooks saddles, screwed on another new one just last week, their web presence not as good as their saddles...

Anonymous said...

left us wondering what topics brooks would like you to write about. how to ride sidesaddle, or how about wearing leather shorts, or which shade of tan does Tan Tenovo prefer.

cakorps said...

Snobby. I’m a CO fan in NYC. Let me buy you a beer tomorrow. As long as it’s an artisanal curated beer!

Larry and Heather said...

We can relate to your photo issues - Once upon a time a magazine we won't name decided to run a story about one of our tours, but didn't like the author's photos. Sound familiar? So they sent out an ace photo couple to Italy to shoot better ones. But they sent them there in March instead of June!!! Print deadlines and all, they said. The photos themselves were excellent - the problem was the sky was gray or black, the vineyards had no leaves and the photo model was dressed for winter rides despite this being a sunny, warm, summer tour! After that great feature we never had enough interest to produce this tour again....ever.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for clearing up the lack of photos in that Brooks Blog for me. All this time I figured Brooks chose not to publish public urination, or worse. It was just mediocre skilz. I can relate. What a relief.

herzogone said...

Please do another fondon't!

leroy said...

My dog still gives me grief about doing the ride, but bailing on the free beer.

Unknown said...

please curate another artisanal all-road ride.

JLRB said...

Scranus

theshepherdsdog said...

thanks for the post Snob.

bad boy of the south said...

I believe I was on the first,if not,then one of the first fondon'ts to take place.
I was definitely a memorable one.
Though I and a few others didn't "fi nish" the goal of riding all the way to the croton aqueduct and then back,it was fun,for sure.
Ready when you are...