Thursday, April 20, 2017

The Official Post-Pre Announcement!

[Please note there will be no post Friday, April 21st as I'll be doing "ride reconnaissance," but I'll be back on Monday the 24th with regular updates.  The Bike Forecast will not be affected.]

Remember how yesterday I pre-announced the pre-ride to the Gran Fondon't?


Well know I'm officially announcing it, and here's the official flyer.  Officially:


So I guess everything after the flyer qualifies as a post-announcement.

Also, please note that officially the official name of this ride is the "BSNYC BOOMB! Pre-Fondon't Ride."  The "BOOMB" stands for Beers On Old Man Brooks.  This is because the Brooks Bicycle Saddle-Making Concern is buying the beers afterward.  Isn't that nice of them?

You bet it its.

Plus, if you show up on a bike equipped with a Brooks saddle you get...well, you get nothing, apart from perhaps the sense of smug self-satisfaction that comes from owning a Brooks.

"I want to join this ride of yours!," you're now shouting into your monitor or smartphone.  "How do I register?"

You don't.  Just show up.  For past rides I've asked people to RSVP via email, but screw that.  Just come to the corner of Broadway and 9th Avenue in Manhattan this coming Saturday morning and be ready to roll at 8:30am:


It's very easy to get there via the Harlem or Hudson River Greenways, the subway, or even the Metro North, but if you're still confused then maybe this isn't the ride for you.

The Route

We'll ride north through Van Cortlandt Park into Westchester, up the South County Trailway for a bit, then cut over over to the Old Croton Aqueduct (OCA) for the return trip.  The OCA is unpaved and there are roots and rocks.  While this will justify your recent purchase of a state-of-the-art gravel bike, your regular road bike will work just as well, though I'd recommend tires over 25mm wide--which you're undoubtedly using anyway, because skinny tires are like soooo out of style.

The South County and the OCA are flat, but we'll go up a couple of decent climbs in between.  If you've never ridden the OCA it's a lot of fun.  We can also work in a coffee stop.

I still haven't decided where we'll go for beers afterwards, but most likely it'll be reasonably close to where we started.

Total distance will probably be around 30 miles, give or take.

If you need a GPS route map complete with elevation and exact mileage then maybe this isn't the ride for you.

The Pace

My racing days are long behind me and as the father of seventeen (17) children I don't have much hustle left in me.  If you want pacelines and attacks I'm happy to point you towards the Gimbels Ride.  In fact there's a pretty decent chance I'll be rolling up in cutoffs and a t-shirt because that's where I'm at in life.  At the same time it's not like I have all day to futz around, so you should be able to get over a hill or two and handle your bike on dirt.  This should be a spirited ramble as opposed to a slog.

Your End of the Bargain

As I mentioned yesterday, in exchange for the free beer and my expert guidance through suburbia I ask that you snap some pictures during the ride and email me at least one good one afterwards, along with some words for context if warranted.  I will then incorporate these pictures into a future post which will most likely appear on the Brooks blog.  So if you've ever complained about my shitty photography, now's your chance to do better.

That should about cover it, but if you have any questions feel free to ask them in the comments.  Otherwise see you Saturday!

Love,


--Wildcat Rock Machine



63 comments:

Synonymous said...

Hello? Hello?

Seattle lone wolf said...

Podio!

ClevelandYeah said...

Podium? If so long time coming.

ClevelandYeah said...

I only posted to piss off Ted K.

N/A said...

Well the ride seems like it should be delightful. I will be there in spirit. Also, depending on when I wake up, I may be having some spirits here at home. We'll see. I'm keeping my options open.

Chazu said...

I figure: "Why ride when I can drive my SUV to the Planet Fitness near starting location?"

That way, I won't have to deal with any icky outdoor stuff like bugs, heat, cold, humidity, and Planet Fitness customers driving SUVs. Not to mention scranus chaffing on a saddle crafted by The Chamferer.

Plus, I can hit the nearby Applebee's after my Planet Fitness workout. #winning

Looking forward to the ride report!

Die free... said...

Top Ten ?

dop said...

Thanks, but what pressure should we run?

BikeSnobNYC said...

dop,

Premium registration of $85 includes a comprehensive list of tire width and pressure calibrated to rider weight. However, I can't send until morning of because it depends on ambient temperature and moisture, if any.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Just thinking out loud said...

Maybe I should do this instead of that pesky Rasputitsa thing in Vermont . . .

BikeSnobNYC said...

Just thinking out loud,

Warning: my ride will not "challenge the human spirit."

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Just thinking out loud said...

WRM,

Then I'll see you at Broadway and 9th - I don't need that challenge, just a beer.

Lieutenant Oblivious said...

Turd-tenth, enjoy Saturday's epic Pre-Fondon't BOOMB!

California said...

I cannot go on the ride. I just cannot. Too far away.

Damn!

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

No Quiz.

Brooks is swell.

Enjoy the Pre BOOB Fondle.

Pist Off said...

Wish I could partake, enjoy the BOOMBs. I'd be torn on which bike to ride as I have an "anti-Fred" roadish bike, which is really just another way of saying "Rivendell-inspired Fred bike." Or I could rock the total Barney bike complete with dropper post to irritate sensible non-mountain riders.

wle said...

WCL!
wle

Serial Retrogrouch said...

...Dang it... I can't make it because I have to take care of the one human child I have. I would bring her on the rear seat, but the OCA is pretty technical. I mean, she'll probably go for it, but I don't have the skills. Plus, I doubt you have #whatperssureyourunning for child portage... or maybe you do?

Joe said...

Snob,

How much for Saturday's ultra premium package (post ride massage, moto-support, personal photographer, etc)? Please charge my AMEX. Thanks.

janinedm said...

I'm still trying to decide between bikes. Does anyone remember the Fondon't pace?

JLRB said...

I hope Bib Short Guy shows up, white t-shirt tucked and all.

Have fun - be safe - drink a beer on Brooke's for me (whatever the hell that means)

BeerDrivenCyclist said...

22th?

janinedm said...

Hold up. The chance of rain on Sunday has dropped to 40% which is good enough for me. TdSI has just re-entered the realm of possibility.

Many Hands Make Light Work said...

While you're getting people to take the pictures of the event for you, perhaps you can ask for submissions for the written parts as well. That way you can just focus on drinking beer.

Anonymous said...

Would you recommend disc brakes for this ride?

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 5:51pm,

Nobody will be allowed to start without disc brakes. I will also be inspecting tire pressure and making sure fork rake and head and seat tube angles are gravel-appropriate.

I do not mess around when it comes to safety.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

PS: $5 surcharge if you wear a helment.

Anonymous said...

I'd so go if I wasn't in San Diego.....

Makeing it up on the volume said...

I think you should franchise this operation

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 6:25pm,

Working with Zwift on a virtual ride-along for next year. You'll feel like you're here and a drone will project a hologram of you so we'll all see you.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

leroy said...

Dear Mr. BSNYC --

What size lock are you running?

My dog insists on outfitting me in something Marley's Ghost-ish, but sometimes it's hard to tell if he's serious.

Of course, if the plan is to imbibe post-ride al fresco, all I have to do is to make sure I don't fall asleep in a doorway.

That's a good way to lose one's shoes.

wle said...

WCL = Maria!

now the magic's gone..

wle

dancesonpedals said...

Oh boy, this is so great!

Anonymous said...

What if I don't want to work in a coffee shop? I already have a job and it's my day off!!

Dooth said...

😢 and

Mage America spell again said...

I'm an Australian and even I know it's "Van Cortlandt" park.

Me Agen said...

And yes, that was a deliberate Muphry's law Easter egg. 'Tis the season after all.

Anonymous said...

Mr Snob, when should we expect to see the Brisbane, Australia edition of this shin dig? :D

William 'Popeye' Shakedpeare said...

IAMB WHAT IAMB

McFly said...

What about re-branding it The Gran Fondue and serving a fountain of liquid cheese along with the free brews?

Everyone loves liquid cheese.

McFly said...

You could get Ortega or Old El Paso on board for a box of expired squeeze cheese packets from their taco kits to suck on along the route.

Bryan said...

Sucks to live in the south east! Have a good ride...drink lots.

Anonymous said...

Stoked. Just picked up a serotta Colorado with record for $250. Such a deal at twice the price!

dancesonpedals said...

the dr scholl's odor eater fondant?

Skidmark said...

Anonymous 10:28pm That reminds me of a birthday present my sister in-law gave me. Explained she got it on sale, real cheap,hardly paid anything for it. Made it real special.

JLRB said...

Westchester also used to be part of Ghina

The $64,000 Dollar Question said...

Another Friday without a quiz :-(

How cum the Fondont isn't starting next to the Gowanus's Canal?

Better yet a Fondont Tri - The first leg will consist of swimming the length of the canal, participants who survive will be transported by ambulance... The Feds were going to clean it up, but The Donald probably needs that money for re-distribution to the struggling wealthy.

70 today in Vancouver, maybe a Babble sighting on Wreck Beach?

bad boy of the sooth said...

Darn.we moved south just as you​ posted a pre-fondon't schedule.enjoy the ride and BOOMBS

Phildefer said...

I'd got if it was Beers On Old Brooks instead of Beers On Old Man Brooks.

Victor Kaminski said...

vsk said ...

JanineDM, The Snob curated FondDoNot will definitely be much more fun than some Staten Island "find a fucking byke layne and get the fuck innit" ride. Do not let Snobbie's pre ride self depreciation deprocation de-embrocation fool you, the pace is fast on the street in the initial "climbs". I say "climbs" because to me a climb is now anything higher than a driveway curb cut. I am just too out of shape to go and do it. The crowd is fun, trying to ask who's who out of regular posters is fun. Some guys told me 3 times who they are and I still forget. I only remember Leroy (sans doggy) as we were lanterne rougeing way behind. I kept up ok most of the way until my Rivendell frump sack was leaning and listing threatening to detach from my rear rack. I corrected it in a minute or 2 but lost the main group. From what I remember I think you would be best served by your Marin. There was a guy on a Raleigh 3 speed who killed it. I am still in awe. I think the OmaFeeets would be too heavy.

All in all, you'll have a better time on the FonDon't. Plus it sounds closer to where you are.
There's more, I just can't think of it rt now...

vsk

Anonymous said...

My farts make me smile

janinedm said...

The Prefondon't is closer and I had fun on last year's Fondon't, but there will be an actual Fondon't so this is not my only chance to ride with the NY contingency. In the meantime the TdSI is a surprising blast with some bonkers hills. The Fondon't I remember having some medium grades that were challenging because of the length of them, but the TdSI has some intimidating rises. And the drivers aren't so bad. I think they're more bemused than anything by the sight of so many cyclists and it ends at a brewery. This is usually the one time a year I can get the Flagship brewery IPA, which is no joke the best beer I've ever had but i don't know where to find it outside of the brewery itself and I'm not going to SI for it alone. This is a long way to say that the forecast now calls for no rain on Sat so I'm going on a ferry ride, but I will definitely go to the Fondon't. I think I may ride the Oma. I ride that bike so much that I'm most comfortable on it. In car and pedestrian free situations I can do a 14-16 mph pace on it. Before I bought my other bikes it was what I rode on "ride outs" with my messenger friends and I've done way more than 30 miles on it at an un-embarrasing pace, though not setting any records. You can ride a Dutch bike pretty hard if it's not covered in human children. Most of all, I feel comfortable that if my calculations are born of mistaken hubris, this group would have the grace to benevolently drop me if it came to it and not wait for me and make me feel bad about it. I could just boot up my GPS and take my ass back home and use those hours to finally replace my chain and cassette on my poor Marin.

Holy Roller said...

Sometimes I wonder, would Jesus eat butter chicken?

dop said...

As long as Brooks is in on it, let's have a pep talk from ken...

bad boy of the sooth said...

dop,where is the killer rabbit?

Denise said...

I feel great that if my counts are conceived of mixed up hubris, this gathering would have the elegance to kindheartedly drop me if it came to it and not sit tight for me and make me feel awful about it. I could only boot up my GPS and take my can back home and utilize those hours to ultimately supplant my chain and tape on my poor Marin.

janiendm said...

How was your ride? Mine was great and this year I had enough beers at the finish festival to figure out what makes the Flagship IPA so good. Grapefruit.

dancesonpedals said...

Denise-

Is your brother denephew?

N/A said...

I wonder if Denise thought yesterday was Wednesday?

Ann M. Arthur said...

I placed an order for this bicycle last fall because I commute to work on a bicycle. It has been the single worst purchase I have ever placed on Amazon. Alongside the bicycle, I requested and purchased the Amazon home service that sent someone to build it. Sadly, this bicycle is too danger to ride. The brakes and handlebar come loose every 2-3 days, the wires near the gears have started poking out and the gears (or chain?) slips when climbing a steep hill (standing upright on the bike). Perhaps it was shoddy workmanship from the "home service" but I think it is the quality of the parts. I have tried very, very hard to get my money back, but the company has even refused to answer my emails and the Amazon "happiness guarantee" has failed miserably to facilitate the communication between the company and me. BOTTOM LINE: Consider your safety first and avoid purchasing this bicycle.

John S. Gillispie said...

This was a Christmas gift and after assembling it I found the front tire would not inflate. The inner tube had to be replaced. The person receiving the gift was disappointed and I had to replace a bran new inner tube.

Jason L. Kroeger said...

Never buy this bike, it’s totally a crap!
After I got my bike, I only used for a couple of times and the handle bars already came loose and I had to tighten it before I use it. But it will come loose again! What’s worse, I already had one of the tubes broken and had to replace it. The saddle of this bike is very hard and uncomfortable! Now this bike becomes a burden to me, I think I will toss it into the trash bin! I am very disappointed with this bike.

Christie B. Stringfield said...

The breaks wear down after a while, and the bike needs re-tightening in areas. However, it is very useful. I would highly recommend it.

wle said...

imaginative spam crap.. seemingly bike content..