Well, subsequently the NYPD conducted a raid on the Hell's Angels clubhouse and took that which is most dear to them.
No, not the bikes.
Oh, and also their bench, but presumably that was merely collateral damage.
Wow, the NYPD's really getting them where it hurts, and during the holidays no less. They better not have fucked with the Hell's Angels Hanukkah Bush, man.
I find Hanukkah to be imbued with pathos, because when it comes to getting kids excited Hanukkah can't hold a candle to Christmas. (DO YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?) Though they do get to play with fire, so there is that:
("Mommy, am I doing it right?')
Speaking of the holidays, every year I make it a point to hop on my bike and go holiday shopping, because there's just something festive about zipping around town with a backpack full of consumer goods. Indeed, this was the subject of one of my Brooks guest posts from last year:
You live for my Brooks guest posts, admit it.
Anyway, yesterday I headed on the bike and indulged my inner Santa Fred once again:
I'm pleased to report I knocked out pretty much my entire shopping list in one backpack load, which is another way of saying everyone's getting slightly mangled gifts this year. I'd also congratulate myself for both helping the local economy and not burning any fossil fuels, but the fact is that once I got home I ordered all the really large and expensive gifts on the Internet.
See, that's how cycling smugness works: as long as we're not igniting the gasoline ourselves it doesn't count.
Oh, and for maximum smugness, make sure to become really indignant when the company that delivers all that stuff you order for blocking the bike lane:
I was with him until I heard that freaking horn.
In any case, thanks to Kickstarter I've once again glimpsed the future, and it's clear that Bicycle Laser Tag is the holiday gift that's going to be on top of everyone's list next year:
Playing the game is simple. Chase behind and get in range of your opponents red receiver, then press your trigger button to shoot. When your opponents red receiver flashes and beeps it represents that your target has been acquired - a hit! When any player is hit ten times the red light will strobe and an audible alarm will sound, informing everyone that the player is out of the game. The player who out maneuvers their opponents and survives from being hit ten times, wins the game.
If nothing else this could completely revolutionize the sport of Cat 6 racing--as could the Lopifit:
So basically it utilizes a motor to provide you the exercise you would have gotten from simply walking without the machine.
This thing's going to be a huge hit.