Monday, April 20, 2015

Sorry, I forgot to wind my Apple watch.

So the "direct action street justice" group Right of Way installed a mural mourning everybody who died in traffic in New York City in 2014 and--surprise!--while they were working a giant truck ran into it:

The truck shows up to the party at the 1:40 mark:


And then after knocking some shit around it drives off in the protected bike lane:


About which one participant (or bystander, I'm not sure) had this to say:


"That was unbelievable, I've never seen a giant truck blatantly just run through a bike lane like that."

Wow, really?  He must be new in town.  Perhaps he read that hilarious article in Bicycling about how we're "America's Most Bike Friendly City" and didn't realize the editorial staff is as delusional about cities as they are about bikes.

As for me, I've seen it all--including Jesus himself coming back in truck form and getting stuck in almost the same spot:


As some Jews look on in bemusement:


("No, he's not.")

See, in New York City bike lanes are only nominally for bikes.  In practice they're generally used for police idling and as wiggle room for truckers.

You know what was unbelievable last Saturday though?  The weather!  And you'd better believe that as a semi-professional bike blogger and cycling enthusiast I finally took my new bike out for its first proper ride:


This is exactly the sort of thing I had in mind for it when I picked it out during the dark days of winter:


And I am pleased to report it's working out beautifully so far:


I'm used to spending the first few miles on a new bike stopping to tweak this dingle or adjust that dongle or figure out what's making that weird noise (especially on a bike that arrived at my home in a box after spending a few days with UPS) but in this case the only dongle that needed any adjusting was my own.  I attribute this to three things:

1) It's a very nice bike;

2) The people at Ben's Cycle assembled and packed it extremely well;

3) After a year and a half of riding a Cambium I've gotten a good sense of how to position it and can get it pretty much right the first time:


(Cambium positioning tip: for best results, place yours on top of the seatpost with rails facing down.)

Oh, by the way, here's the head badge for the commenter who asked to see it:


And here's another badge of some kind:


I'm not sure what that is, but I'm guessing it's either a birthmark, or else a silhouette of Conan O'Brien.

Just kidding, I know what it is.

It's the great state of Ohio.

But yes, so far I'm extremely pleased with the bike--like "Hmmm, I could probably get rid of a couple of my other bikes at this point" pleased:


And for those of you who want to know more about it but are too lazy to click on links, here you go:

Features and Information: 
• Frame is made in the USA by Waterford Precision Cycles*
• Built with True Temper OX Platinum Tubing
• Designed for use as a geared road or cyclocross bike
• Set-up for a long reach (47-57mm) brakes
• Down Tube Shifter Bosses
• Chainstay Bridge
• Down tube AND Seat tube mounted water bottle braze-on.
• High quality Ritchey road dropouts
• Seatpost Clamp Included!
• Designed to fit up to a 700x32c tire
• 1-/8" head tube, 27.2mm seatpost, 130mm rear spacing, 68mm bottom bracket shell.

*The frame is made by Waterford, but the fork is not. The fork is a standard road fork we import. Waterford upgrade available in the kit builder for added cost.

I should also point out that the bicycle and I were both equally happy on paved roads, but the problem with riding on roads is that you tend to encounter, well, roadies.  


I encountered this group of fashionable Freds at an intersection and dropped back immediately so as to avoid commingling.  (I don't mean this as an insult, by the way.  If anything I was sparing them my noxious presence.)  However, when I stopped at the cafĂ© a little while later, there they were:


Note the woman in green wearing the "Eeeew, a bunch of bikers have invaded my town!" expression that should be immediately familiar to any cyclist who has stopped in a picturesque town in order to give their local businesses money:


As for the cyclists themselves, they were holding an impromptu runway show:


So I knew right away this must be the Rapha Cycle Club ride.

Fortunately I'd caught them just as they were finishing, so I didn't have to wait on line for six hours while they each ordered their special big city coffee drinks.  (Sure, I'd ridden up there from the same big city, but I have a townie mentality because I live on the mainland.)  Instead, I walked right in and foolishly bought the gooiest snack in the joint:


It started melting immediately, and as the Rapha crew remounted their $10,000 bicycles and turned their Strava accounts back on I sat on a bench with a face full of chocolate and swinging my pale, stubbly legs like a child waiting for the short bus:


In all it was a lovely ride, but it was also the longest ride I'd taken in a few moths.  Therefore, I was forced to stop once more, this time at a Dunkin' Donuts in Yonkers for an "emergency Coke" to carry me the last few miles home.

As you can imagine, the setting was a bit less rarefied:


Instead of a bevy of fashionable Rapha-ites, my only companions were a guy with a recumbent and another guy in giant Beats headphones who was collecting bottles out of the trash while singing "Backstabbers" by the O'Jays at the top of his lungs.  (Every time he shouted "What they do!" I jumped a little.)  I also noticed something in the distance.  At first I thought it was a bicycle, but then I noticed it was one of those personal mobility scooters, and the rider was "taking the lane" (as the smuggies say):


I was quite impressed, especially because this road intersects pretty much every major highway in the area and people drive very fast on it:


As the scooter drew nearer, the bottle collector stopped his crooning:


And with a flourish he and the scooter pilot exchanged greetings:


I've really got to rethink my cynical stance on the waving debate.

105 comments:

Vernal Magina said...

Jeepers.

Ricochet said...

I'm the winner

samh said...

Suite

No more Mr.Nice Guy said...

I never tested positive. (My wife did it!)

Flyover BC said...

top ten

Charles said...

First five?

bad boy of the north said...

in the first ten.snob,thanks for badge shot.

dop said...

Tarrytown!!!

Is Mighty Mouse far behind?

wle said...

i thought the apple.watch ran on steam or sweat or something

wle

Adam said...

Is that the C15 Cambium? It looks a bit narrower than the standard.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Adam,

It's the standard, the wacky scranus-eye camera angle is probably what makes it look narrower.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Anonymous said...

Giggles at the imagery of you enjoying your treat.
Treats!

Anonymous said...

testing

cycle

Anonymous said...

10 minutes gone and already dropped to 14th by the caffeinated peloton.

Anonymous said...

yo dawg, what's the gruppo on the new Ohio branded beik?

ken e. said...

i am a robot!

Anonymous said...

Babble, following up on your Friday post on cell talking civilians. I encounter this variation on the theme all of the time at the gym. At the risk of sounding sexist it normally involves high school and 20 something young women. They use an exercise machine and she their done they don't get off the machine and move on. Nope, out comes the cell phone and they sit there on the machine staring at it or texting. It doesn't matter if your standing there obviously waiting to your the machine either. I asked one cell phone holding young woman if she was done; no comment, she got up and walked away, but not until she had rolled her eyeballs first.

Anonymous said...

yeah snob, i think with this new ohio bike, i would say, doesn;t this duplicate most of all yr other bikes?

wle

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 1:37pm,

Shimano One Hundred And Five.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Anonymous said...

True Temper Platinum OX is the shit. My Salsa Alla Carte is the toughest, most comfortable ride ever--OK, maybe my old Kona Hei Hei titanium was slightly smoother, but also cost 4x as much.

BikeSnobNYC said...

wle,

Since my racing days are on indefinite hiatus it does sort of replace the road bike and the cyclocross bike, yes.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Angry Beaver in Miramichi said...

"but in this case the only dongle that needed any adjusting was my own...I've gotten a good sense of how to position it and can get it pretty much right the first time"

Experience counts and women are experts at the positioning of a guy's dongle too.

Tweed said...

You're not the first person to mistake the great state of Wisconsin for Ohio...Some president of a third world country just south of Canadia did the same thing a few years ago.

JB said...

It is good to see the 105 on there Snobsi. I've got an elderly 8-sp 105 set-up, but it still works fine. The newer bikes I see (except in the LBS) usually have at least Ultegra, so I was wondering if the modern 105 is up to speed.

A long-term (10 days) review is due on my desk in, well, 10 days.

105 = SLX?
Ultegra = XT?

People run those scooter things anyplace, since the sidewalks/curbs are so out of ADA compliance, they have to run in the street. Honey badger don't give a shit.

Anonymous said...

Ohio looks strangely like Wisconsin.

babble on said...

I love the way your Cambium scranus cradle is so very well camoflaged. Um, and I can see a career opportunity in professional Dongle Adjustment. Because these things matter.

Anon@1:43 - interesting. Strangely enough, I noticed several guys completely tuned out, with faces in phone AND both headphones in over the weekend. I mean, I can understand why you might want to have music or the radio on whilst you're jogging, but why not have one earbud in and the other out? Having said that, even one earbud in is completely prohibited on group and club rides, and for good reason. After all, communication is KEY.

babble on said...

Oh! OHOHOHOH! Vancouver has a new Trans Am totem, which makes sense in a world where car is king. And after last week's oil spill in Vancouver's harbour, you can smell the stink of political spin clear across the region. There's definitely something fishy in English Bay these days.

NHcycler said...

"...but then I noticed it was one of those personal mobility scooters, and the rider was "taking the lane"

"I was quite impressed, especially because this road intersects pretty much every major highway in the area and people drive very fast on it"

Well, he did have a police escort!

Herschel Raney said...

For some reason I decided to go read some of the Washington Post piece comments.

Now I just want to slap the crap out of everyone I see.

Lost my Jesus feeling.

Cool new bike though.

crosspalms said...

Let's all chip in and buy Snob a second water bottle. Not that I want to take business away from Dunkin Donuts, but if anyone deserves it he does.

babble on said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BikeSnobNYC said...

crosspalms,

I don't remember where I read this (maybe Joe Parkin's "A Dog In A Hat") but someone once said that he only rode with one bottle because if you're not racing and are simply out for a ride you _should_ be stopping from time to time.

I took that to heart. One bottle encourages a little bit of leisure.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

babble on said...

So, one good road bike, one for nasty, salt infected winter roads. One fully fenderized, chaingard and mudflap equipped upright city bike, one cargo bike and a mountain bike. Oh, and a clown bike for when I have to take the train durning rush hour.

That's it. That's all I need. Just this lamp and those bicycles.

And a sacrificial bike for when I'm at the hottest, trendiest part of newly gentrified Gastown. But that's it. Just this lamp, this city bike, this winter bike, this cargo bike, that racing bike, this folding bike, the mountain bike, a sacrificial bike and that's it. That's all I need. I don't need anything else. And this vulvanus cradle. I don't need ONE OTHER THING!!

Anonymous said...

midpacking fodderite

WFP Entrant 1 said...

Anyone want to start a retro-grouch pool on when the spoke deficient wheels on the black Brewski Bike fail? I guess June 27.

babble on said...

Don't you do any more of those super sweat generating group rides anymore, Snobi Wan? Um, and don't forget the Fondon't. You might need a second bottle then. Mind you, I fully expect to see beer tents along the route, because what would a Fondon't be without booze?

Steve Jobs said...


"i thought the apple.watch ran on steam or sweat or something

They run on brain waves? But only if the wearer is a genius.

JB said...

Beer tents? They have these things called bars, taverns, and, sometimes, saloons.

DB said...

I'm in, Crosspalms.
Do I send the fifty cents to you or Snob?

babble on said...

I guess I'm just excited at the prospect of beer in the great out of doors. Vancouver recently amended its liquor laws so that it isn't always strictly against the law to drink on beaches, etc. Wreck will lose a bit of its advantage.

PotbellyJoe said...

UGH Earbudded riders...

I nearly ran one over this weekend.

I too took advantage of the beautiful Saturday and headed for Sourlands. No seriously, it's a thing.

Once the three of us were in the hilly bit we were approaching a rider. We were travelling considerably quicker than she was down a steeper grade. I yelled to let her know we were there and passing her. Go alongside her and she freaks out and nearly turns into us.

Then I saw the earbuds.

Stupid.

I love music. Like really really love music. Of all kinds. I love the stuff. I have never understood the need to have music playing in your ears when you are OUTSIDE working out. Take in nature! Enjoy the scenery. This isn't the drudgery of a treadmill in a white-walled, partially-mirrored room with a fan.

Gah!

Silhouette of Conan O'Brien Movie Quote said...

John Winger: C'mon, it's Czechoslovakia. We zip in, we pick 'em up, we zip right out again. We're not going to Moscow. It's Czechoslovakia. It's like going into Wisconsin.
Russell Ziskey: Well I got the shit kicked out of me in Wisconsin once. Forget it!

dop said...

Beer tents? That would take effort and planning. That Gunhill Road Brewery looked bike friendly & Westchester has plety of places to drink on the water. (Bridgeview tavern in sleepy hollow, striped bass in Tarrytown, Red Hat in Irvington...Dobbs Ferry has the Half Moon on the water & Harpers just off the OCA trail. Hastings has Harvest on Hudson which is too fancy inside, but has a large lawn down to the water with a bar. (and a ton of dives on main street)

babble on said...

Woah! Check THIS out! You won't give a ratz arse, Snobbydoodydoo, but its going to turn the whole market for power meters Up Side down!!

Spencer said...

What dey do?

Next Line said...

The smile in your face.

Spokey said...

Snobs

how's your C17 holding up?

I really like my C17 but the nose is starting to stretch. I can now see a slight gap at the back of nose rivet.

Never had anything like that on B17s and the only one I ever attacked with the adjustment wrench was one that got soaked in the rain. My black '95 B17 has a little sag so maybe I'll need to hit that soon too.

Guess I'll check the warranty although I assume it's now at least 36 seconds out of warranty

Anonymous said...

White crabon rapha fred sled got some $600 brakes yo!

1983 David Byrne said...

RE: Apple Watch

Watch out, you might get what you're after

Grump said...

Nice bike.
Looks like a re-branded version of the Gunnar Sport, but has a nice head tube badge. You will love it. Frame is somewhere between 3-1/2 to 4 pounds (if you are able to lose 2 pounds off your body weight, you'll have the equivalent of a 2 pound crabon frame. I ride the racing version of that frame.(if you want to call what I do, racing)

PS If a Semi runs over you, your frame will bend.

Anonymous said...

Am I the only one who noticed the Lady in green's ass is huge?

Anonymous said...

"chilling" - indeed.

tomorrow some other egg-sucking liberal group will be protesting the use of paper & ink for all the chalk silhouettes.

fucking new york should be taken back by the indians.

balls™ said...

Snob,
Nice ride. Next, we need some more intimate photos though. Perhaps something giving us a peek up the bottom bracket?

Babble,
Thanks for going full "Jerk" on us. Nice thermos.

P. Bateman said...

Snob,

since you are in the "get rid of extra bikes" mindset...lets make this whole quiz thing actually worth something...

BikeSnobNYC said...

Spokey,

Haven't noticed anything but haven't looked either.

--Wildcat Etc.

DB said...

Happy 420, everyone.
I'm really hungry today.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Grump,

Yes, I think this bike is basically a slightly racier Sport from what I can tell.

--Wildcat Etc.

Christo said...

Speaking of the waving debate - I rode two and from work yesterday on the bike path here in Frumunda and given I'd not ridden for a while I was exceptionally ebullient to be back on the bike.

I couldn't resist a hello to every passing walker/jogger/cyclist. My estimates of acknowledgement back are:
Joggers: 90%
Walkers 80%
Cyclists 40%
So there you go Snob, you're not the only cynic there.

bieks said...

Snob, thanks for not making me click that link and you're welcome for providing you with a reason to cut and paste content. Win-win. Laziness! Woo-

Anti-Christo said...

I chose to yell fuck you to everyone I passed today and the responses were:
Joggers: Can't hear you - I'm wearing earbuds
Walkers: See honey, I told you they were all assholes
Cyclists: Don't mess with my cadence

leroy said...

Spotted in Brooklyn yesterday: The over-protected bike lane.

I still don't know how my dog takes all those pictures without an opposable thumb.

Anonymous said...

Still wanna know if scouts can earn a head badge...

Herschel Raney said...

http://www.cyclingweekly.co.uk/news/latest-news/the-seven-best-new-products-of-2015-so-far-167490

Babbs power link led me to that.

Just say NO.

Pathetic Old Cyclist said...

There were alot of asshole drivers out this past weekend. I hate the first few nice days of spring. It brings out every overstressed suburban moron who has a million things to do, top of the list is wiping out a cyclist or two. Blessedly, it got chilly and windy late yesterday afternoon, so Ithink they all went back into semi hibernation. I could tell, I didnt nearly die during yezterday's twilight ride.

Anonymous said...

"fucking new york should be taken back by the indians."

But India is a neutralist nation!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the saddle tip. Perhaps it will help address the two, parallel welts I have running the length of my perineum.

By the way, after years of owning everything from entry-level hybrids to high-end race bikes, I too recently found a reasonably-priced "swiss army bike" that has me looking to pass along several "purpose-specific" steeds to owners who will get more use out of them. Score.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the saddle tip. Perhaps it will help address the two, parallel welts I have running the length of my perineum.

By the way, after years of owning everything from entry-level hybrids to high-end race bikes, I too recently found a reasonably-priced "swiss army bike" that has me looking to pass along several "purpose-specific" steeds to owners who will get more use out of them. Score.

babble on said...

Heyyyy now that's a good idea! A peek up the bottom bracket... no wait. Pretty sure I did that in spades a couple of weeks ago. And this girl scout earned a gold star and a badge for... er... never mind.

Balls- my pleasure! Comes naturally to some of us. :)

matthew kiernan said...

funny…. when I looked a the shot of the second badge on the bike, for a split second it looked like peeling paint!

Third Person Cipo said...

Back when the Cipo was a bambino Cipo caught 'little Cipo' in the power shifter of his Schwinn 3 speed stik shift Sting Ray Muscle Bike. Luckily there was no damage to the shifter.

Anonymous said...

OBSERVATION:
This bike seems very American to me. I'm sure it's very good and I'm not even exactly sure what I mean by American bike, but no way can you gaze upon it and immediately think "ah yes, typical Euro style" or something.

REQUEST:
Could you include prices for purchases made during your expeditions? I really don't want to know what that goo actually was, but I would be interested to know what it cost.

REQUEST FOR CLARIFICATION:
When you refer to your "stubbly" legs, do you mean they're covered in stubble because you haven't shaved them for a while or did you mean "stubby", as in short and plump?

SUGGESTION:
Those bottle collector and mobility scooter guys know more than they let on. They're privy to all manner of privileged information. You should cultivate friendships with them and link into their network. Then your blog could practically write itself.

GRATUITOUS CLOSING REMARK:
I don't like the bike's paint job. Matte black doesn't really work on skinny traditional tubes and forks.

bad boy of the north said...

snob,that particular dunkin'donuts
you went to in today's post is a pretty good place to see a huge spectrum of society.yikes!
I would stop in there occasionally when I worked down that way years ago. I was never disappointed in the entertainment factor.

Anonymous said...

You went in a Dunkin's without your helment on? You're going to DIEEEEE etc. when a car crashes into it!

Alex Orange said...

The 'mind kontrol droogs' are in the Dunkin Donuts coffee. That's the extra taste zing one experiences when savoring Korporate Ideologically Reconstructed Coffee Products.

Brother says "You Will Obey!

Anonymous said...

My group ride won't stop for a donut shop. However, Garmin settings require a stop. I'm disappointed and will probably just go alone next time.

Grump said...

Snobby, I did some checking and it turns out that your frame is a bargain. Not only is it a little fancier than the Gunnar Sport, it's also cheaper and came with a fork.
It looks like you made an "all net" purchase.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 6:47pm,

I was wearing a helment!

Riding a bike is one thing, but standing in front of a Dunkin' Donuts without safety gear?

Now that's just crazy.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Old-timer said...

That Rapha Cycle Club ride…sweet! Nice bikes. Nice Rapha/SKY kits. Nice route. Probably all nice folks. One thing we have that they don’t: we have the smartest, prettiest, best legs girl in the game: we have Babble! They don’t.

Spokey said...

anon @ 6:27 PM

you thought a person wrote this tripe!

It does rite itself. at least it has since vito passed. i assume you have noticed the deteriorating quality since early 2013.

Anonymous said...

Snob, do you ever ride anywhere except the OCA?

The Dude said...

Rapha Runway Show? I thought they were practicing duck walking.
4/20 Greetings

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 8:58pm,

Yes.

I use it very often though. It's very close to where I live and by far the most fun route to the good roads and MTB trails in Westchester, not to mention pretty much the only place in reasonable proximity to the city you can ride a road bike on dirt for more than a mile at a time.

Plus, I've put in many years riding in North Jersey/Rockland, so I'm a little burned out on heading over the G.W.B.

--Wildcat Etc.

BikeSnobNYC said...

Anonymous 8:58pm,

Also, I have a little less patience for "sharing" the road with motor vehicle traffic every year, so I try to keep my routes as car-free as possible.

--Wildcat Rock Machine

Dave said...

Oh all right - someone has to say it:

"Badges? We don't need no stinkin' badges. We've got Shimano 105!"

JLRB said...

Forget Conan's profile - picture #10 the Cambrium looks like Squidward's profile

Jlrb said...

I like the one water bottle forced leisure stop - will borrow that one

Good Buddy Messiah said...

Jesus Christ! Look at that truck.

Anonymous said...

Any real strava hater would know his enemy and would therefore know that it goes on PAUSE once you stop rolling. I don't visit coffee shops but do use Strava to log my miles instead of using a computer. Every now and then, I get to crush a Fred or two.

PotbellyJoe said...

Snobi Wan,

Now that you're a famous muck-racker hellbent on bringing down the Automobilopoly, will you still have time for us?

You've been referenced on the Autoblog (AOL/HuffPo cleverly called HuffyPo when they do a bike article):
http://www.autoblog.com/2015/04/19/bicycles-vs-cars-battle-for-roads/

The Jalopnik (Gawker Media)
http://gizmodo.com/i-ride-120-200-miles-a-week-once-the-weather-in-the-ne-1698025177

PS. DO NOT READ THE COMMENTS

eric chamferer said...

I think if you rub that Canbium it will get bigger.

Anonymous said...

Fuck yeah Jesus Helments!

recumbent conspiracy theorist said...

Nice report. Nary an utterance of the word crabon.

Bryan said...

"woosie" is taking a train cause you can't ride there AND back...

Bryan said...

JB @1353:

I liked the latest 10 speed 105 when I was testing some bikes out last year...I liked it more than the 11 speed Ultegra. Everything about it felt right, and the shifting was butter smooth. Though ultimately I went with SRAM Rival just to try out something completely different (I found I like the double tap)

JB said...

Thanks for the opinion, Bryan. But I don't know anything about brifters (is that the umbrella term?) since my 105 shifts on the downtubes...

McFly said...

I have a ShimanoMutt. 105 er'thing but calipers (Tektro) and front deraiullierillier (Ultegra)....there was a small explosion when I bolted the Ultegra on but it settled down and did not even crack the crabon because it's vertically stiff and milf compliant.

I like the fender capability on the Milkwalkee.

dop said...

In honor of the shimano RX 100 on my commuter bike, I'll make a sprint for the century

dop said...

specialized allez sport '94

dop said...

downtube shifters

dop said...

indexed in back
friction front

Anonymous said...

buttery smooth on the front der...clickety click on the indexed rear

triple crank

dop said...

RX 100 was supposed to be equivalent to 105, but not as durable...oh well...I'll have to change it in 10 more years


we don't need no stinking sti

dop said...

hotly contested


ionjo

Smart Cyclist said...

Do you need to bed-in the Cambium saddle?

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