But I can't, because I'm only in town for two days, and I'll be busy the whole time making a video for my new book.
However, I can invite you to be an extra in this video. Yes, if you've ever dreamed of being on YouTube to help some schmuck sell something, you can report to the following places at the following times:
12-1pm on Thursday, February 7th, at South Park
3-5pm on Friday, February 8th, at the Windmill.
The video is being made by Plus M Productions, who made my last video. If you're not familiar with Plus M Productions, one of the two principals is this guy:
Or, if you prefer, this guy:
So obviously it's worth showing up just to get his autograph.
In the meantime, impending travel is usually my cue to tie up unfinished business at home, though when you're a bike blogger-cum-book author the truth is you don't really have much business. Really, this scene from a cinema classic speaks most accurately to the condition of being a blogger:
Nevertheless, even I have things to do occasionally. Specifically, awhile back a gun enthusiast was auctioning a copy of "Bike Snob" on eBay because he hates me now, and I promised that I'd write a poem and draw a picture in it for the winner. Well, I've been a little late in actually doing that, but I'm pleased to report that the muse sat on my face yesterday evening and furnished me with the necessary inspiration:
There once was a man from Londinium,
Who had quite a painful perineum.
He bought a Brooks seat,
And it soothed his sore meat,
But to break it in took a millennium.
While I certainly have no intention of engaging in a "blog off" with Fat Cyclist (he'd win, he's very competitive), I am always enthralled by scientific lube studies:
Jean-Paul Sartre famously wrote "Hell is other people," but if you ask me Hell is spending all your time alone in a lab testing lubes:
Smith’s process for testing the lubes is time-consuming, involving a multi-stage stripping and lubing procedure before each chain ever hits a piece of test equipment. He is meticulous; each lube is tested on three different chains under exactly the same load, always in the same direction, and every chain is identically impregnated with each lube thanks to the use of an ultrasonic machine.
Though if you edit that down it does sound a lot like "foffing off" and impregnating someone from across the room:
Suck on that, Walt Whitman.
Speaking of Brooks, before starting this blog I'd never actually owned one of their sitting devices, but now I have no fewer than three. (That's pretentious for "I have exactly three.") Not only do I find them all exceedingly comfortable, but they also felt that way almost immediately, with no lengthy break-in period required. I'm not sure why this is, but I imagine that years of sitting perched on the end of hard plastic saddles while desperately clinging to the back of the field in park races has given me a scranus of steel, and I'll take that proudly to the grave:
My last wishes, by the way, are to be portaged in a bakfiets on a funereal theme ride through the streets of Portland and then dumped unceremoniously into my grave and sprinkled with Stumptown coffee grounds.
In the meantime, I'm making life count by reading Twitter, and this Tweet amused me:
In the meantime, I'm making life count by reading Twitter, and this Tweet amused me:
I'd like to see a blog off between @bikesnobnyc & @fatcyclist...lthe challenge? bit.ly/VzLMkV Mock. Parody. Emulate. So many choices
— Bill Hart-Davidson (@billhd) February 4, 2013
While I certainly have no intention of engaging in a "blog off" with Fat Cyclist (he'd win, he's very competitive), I am always enthralled by scientific lube studies:
Jean-Paul Sartre famously wrote "Hell is other people," but if you ask me Hell is spending all your time alone in a lab testing lubes:
Smith’s process for testing the lubes is time-consuming, involving a multi-stage stripping and lubing procedure before each chain ever hits a piece of test equipment. He is meticulous; each lube is tested on three different chains under exactly the same load, always in the same direction, and every chain is identically impregnated with each lube thanks to the use of an ultrasonic machine.
Though if you edit that down it does sound a lot like "foffing off" and impregnating someone from across the room:
Testing the lubes...time-consuming...multi-stage stripping...lubing procedure...meticulous...same load, always in the same direction...impregnated.
Basically, it's all a bunch of "tooting your own horn"--which, it turns out, is exactly what Velo(news) is doing:
Now allow us to toot our own horn, at least a bit. At Velo, we take our testing seriously. No “laterally stiff and vertically compliant” nonsense here — unless something actually is.
Yes, I agree that using the phrase "laterally stiff and vertically compliant" is far more ridiculous than spending $50,000 on a bunch of equipment to test lube.
And in conclusion:
After exploring Smith’s lab, it is clear that this lube test is only the start. Smith is measuring, or will be soon, the efficiency of various pedals, chainrings, chainlines, hubs, bottom brackets and more. It’s a goldmine of incredible data, and it’s a safe bet that you’ll find more of it in the pages of Velo going forward.
To which I would append the following:
Once you've reached the point where you consider lube test results "incredible data" it's already too late, so if you're even remotely intrigued now do yourself a favor and get rid of your crabon bike immediately. Buy a Rivendell, take up golfing, break both your legs, whatever it takes. Believe me, you do not want to disappear down the Fredhole of friction and wattage--because while you might save 2.5 seconds in the local race you'll never win anyway, there's no recouping the loss in time, money, and human relationships. One day you're perusing incredible chain lube data in the pages of Velo, and the next you're getting busted for doping in a Gran Fondo and your coach at CTS isn't returning your calls.
It's just not worth it.
With that, I will take my leave and fortify myself for the smuggery of San Francisco. I hope to see one or two of you out there and either way I look forward to returning to all three of you on Monday.
Love,
--Wildcat Rock Machine
Basically, it's all a bunch of "tooting your own horn"--which, it turns out, is exactly what Velo(news) is doing:
Now allow us to toot our own horn, at least a bit. At Velo, we take our testing seriously. No “laterally stiff and vertically compliant” nonsense here — unless something actually is.
Yes, I agree that using the phrase "laterally stiff and vertically compliant" is far more ridiculous than spending $50,000 on a bunch of equipment to test lube.
And in conclusion:
After exploring Smith’s lab, it is clear that this lube test is only the start. Smith is measuring, or will be soon, the efficiency of various pedals, chainrings, chainlines, hubs, bottom brackets and more. It’s a goldmine of incredible data, and it’s a safe bet that you’ll find more of it in the pages of Velo going forward.
To which I would append the following:
Get out! Get out now!
Once you've reached the point where you consider lube test results "incredible data" it's already too late, so if you're even remotely intrigued now do yourself a favor and get rid of your crabon bike immediately. Buy a Rivendell, take up golfing, break both your legs, whatever it takes. Believe me, you do not want to disappear down the Fredhole of friction and wattage--because while you might save 2.5 seconds in the local race you'll never win anyway, there's no recouping the loss in time, money, and human relationships. One day you're perusing incredible chain lube data in the pages of Velo, and the next you're getting busted for doping in a Gran Fondo and your coach at CTS isn't returning your calls.
It's just not worth it.
With that, I will take my leave and fortify myself for the smuggery of San Francisco. I hope to see one or two of you out there and either way I look forward to returning to all three of you on Monday.
Love,
--Wildcat Rock Machine
218 comments:
1 – 200 of 218 Newer› Newest»What
AND THAT'S HOW A BILL BECOMES A LAW!
Am I the only one that is uttely amazed at my clean streak?
ZOOTS
Sheesm 707
top teen
Read the post...fun stuff Snob, thanks.
wow... short really is short - we'll miss you.
TOP TEEN
Hasta la pasta
Tell the truth, that extras call for "a video for my new book" is actually a recruitment drive for a study on scranus efficiency.
Enjoyed looking at ! and ! and !.
The lube test has me wondering how I can make my bike's fenders and panniers more aerodynamic and shave a few seconds off my commute.
Ride and video safely, Snob!
11321 maddng, which is right next to the maddng crowd
And props to McFly for 2 podium steps and an unprecedented clean streak.
He's gone all Ward Cleaver and shit. Too bad.
Yeesh. Late to the start. Again.
I might buy a Rivendell someday but I am not taking up golf. Don't do the ball sports.
Have fun in San Francisky.
Don't forget to wear a flower in your hair.
What the hell is wrong with friction. It's saved my butt a few times, and also made my wife relatively happy... for a little while at least.
crabon aero-basket
Go Drafter! (ZOD)
If there were no friction, you couldn't turn your bike.
Think about it.
Oh yeah, KNEEL BEFORE ZOD.
Approve
Top 10
Congratulations on your imminent cum book, Snob, though I didn't think you were going in that direction (not that there's anything wrong with that).
If you don't come to Cleveland for a bra stop sometime soon I'm gonna quit buying your damn books.
I've been walkin' the line lately, but I have a feeling that The Beaver is in for it tonight. A good tongue-lashing followed up with a mild spanking is in order.
DB here. Tired of Google.
I assume the Flaming Lips will be the soundtrack for your video?
LANCE!!!!! "YOU'LL NEVER WALK.....errrr....RIDE ALONE"
HYPOCRISY is a DANGEROUS NOUN...........
bon voyage!
After exploring Smith’s lab, it is clear that this lube test is only the start. Smith is masturbating, or will be soon.
Fixed it.
balls™
You spelled Doosh wrong. For all eternity.
Very interesting and entertaining videos.
Will your commercial be on KRON TV like this one?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gz0NRNudFXA
SCRANUS
"Using more $50,000 worth of purpose-built, self-funded testing equipment, Smith is analyzing everything from bearings to bushings, jockey wheels to pedal spindles to chain lubricants."
-Artisanal Friction Testing
Snob, take the captchas off for the rest of the week. I feel a comment-a-thon coming on. Can't do it with those captchas gettin' in the way. We'll put up with the spam till you get back.
FRIC TION
DATA MINE
FRED TRAP
I left my heart in San Francisco,
but my diginity in Poughkeepsie.
My dog sold me some flowers for my hair. Turned out they were plastic.
San Francisco treat.
VeloNuws is emulating European magazines that test bike shit and try to put numbers on stuff. It typically works out to, "this is 5% better*".
(*plus or minus 5%)
The underlying theme is that you have to buy more to go faster. They are still pushing the concept that Lance Armstrong won races because of his strict cycling research and development with Trek. They have to, otherwise one would conclude that the whole magazine has been bullshit for the last decade.
Capcha is telling me to burn things.
jim.cassa, I beg to differ.
FRIC TION
FREE FUCK
TEST LUBE
Or it might just be me.
Oh how I wish I could heft my hefty dutch bike on down to San Francisco. I would love to dress all Euro and be extra to your project.
Guess I'll have to stay here and slave drive any kidlets I can get my hands on instead.
Yesterday, I warned that when visiting SF, do not assume a club named "Backpackers" is about the great outdoors.
<a href="http://www.backpacker.com/>This must all be confusing to gay men </a>.
More lube testing jokes, please. Thanks.
meh..
This must all be confusing to gay men .
Oh and nice podio McFly.
Slippery slope McFly, slippery slope.
Hey Snob, if you didn't video it, it never happened. Oh wait, you've got that covered. Carry on.
By dressing all euro, he means this.
hwarhwarhwar....stoopeeed americahhns.
Dear Wildcat Rock Machine,
I'll see you on Friday. Should I show up with panniers on my city bike?
Scranus
Am I the only one that is uttely amazed at my clean streak??
Not Really, in this tough economy, many are unemployed. If anyone accuses you of anything, just call them a cunt.
Captcha is telling me to burn precise addresses.
I lurrrrrrve lube. It's fun in a tube.
I can test some for you.
DB here.
Frilly: let's discuss Ragbrai. I'm at robertleesimmons@gmail.com.
Anyone else interested, let me know.
I'm picturing Frilly and Babbles on a tandem.
Commie, I am studying this documentary to figure out what to wear.
You scoff at lube testing now, but i think you'll appreciate the extra 6% increase in viscosity when you are out in San Francisco.
what? they hills are steep. you need smooth running gear.
what else did you think i was talking about?
I'm picturing Frilly and Babbles on a recumbent tandem.
Is there singletrack in Frisco?
BONV YAGE
RICE RONI
WILD CATT
ROCK MCHN
Are you aware that your Thursday shoot is basically at Strava headquarters?
Lance and Strava:
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887324445904578284144255080394.html
Oh, that short.
Will, you be, in my video,
Darling every night ...
You can show your legs
as you're getting in the car
and I will look repulsive
as I mangle my guitar ...
F. Zappa, "Be in my Video"
Dennis @2:27 -- That's a great idea!
Now, where can I score myself a king size bottle of AstroGlide?
My woman don't need no lube, unless I'm hitting the stink pipe. Yours in christ,
Mario C.
"Hitting the stink pipe"...man, it doesn't get any sexier than that.
Hey! When is BSNY/MC Spandex super best friends video collaboration dropping?
My mom always told me I'm special, so I must be one of the three he's coming back to next week.
I'm picturing Babble and Frilly and forget about the bike.
BRKS SADL
ASSH ACHT
http://yarchive.net/bike/leather_saddles.html
If McFly is first and third how do you take a podium picture without resorting to Photoshop, the EPO of photography?
It really is unprecedented in the "Capcha Era".
Hey Annie, I love your work.
It's always amazing who drops by the BSNYC blog.
...how appropriate that bsnyc/rtms/wcrm, our very own don quixote de la mancha, our 'tilter of windmills' as per all things cycling, along with his squire sancho panza as played by helper monkey vito, who we'll assume will ride something donkey-ish with 24" wheels, should end up as west as west could be, here in these 'contiguous', whilst raising his lance within the shadow of a san francisco windmill...
...has a bakefiets worthy of the name rocinante, his lunbering steed, been procured ???...
...once again, eben cervantes weiss lunges forth 'from sea to shining sea'...
...just sayin'...
RCT, yeah no kiddin' mate. Annie, how ya bin?
Annie,
Bret could take all three podio spots and shoot the picture, too.
- nonplussed
ro-EE feen-YAY
Can a person be a bike snob and live in the midwest? I mean, my buddies went to the CX worlds and wore tyvek suits. But I didn't cause KY is for horses.
http://travelswithpops.blogspot.com/2013/02/if-that-was-too-many-words.html
I wanted to make some joke about Rouille "Jockomo" Figners and Mardi Gras, got tangled up in Wikipedia, gave up on the joke but found my favorite sentence of the day: ""Jakamo Fi Na Ye" is also, whether coincidentally or not, the phrase "The black cat is here" in Bambara, a West African Mandingo language."
I have a black cat and from here on will say "Jakamo Fi Na Ye" when he comes in the room.
"if you love someone, set them free"
Spending my time alone testing lubes is my idea of a good time.
It's more fun with a friend.
Anon at 2:50, I don't know what a collaboration is, but I admit that an MC Spandex/BSYNC collabo is definitely in order. Bret cameo?
4020 ngestso. Thank Lob it's lunchtime.
Your thumb looks like a Witchety Grub
But if you REALLY love someone, lube them well.
Somehow missed "VeloLab stiffness tests"
It took until this late in the day for me to notice that Dieter's son is in the first video. Duh.
dude that old dutch windmill powers two piston pumps; one to move poop out past 3rd break, and the other to fill epic burrittoos.
ivaaaly 699
Lovely book inscription, Snob. A treasure to hand down for generations. Or now they can re-eBay it for even more dinero.
vacymo 9885
Vacuum-O nine dee eight! How's that for a crosspalms tie-in?
Spending time with Babble testing lubes is my idea of a good time.
I follow Lance on Strava. It done ironically at the time but his stats are interesting to check out.
As far as looking euro and having a heavy bike, I have a pannier rack on an old school but nota wardrobe metro wardrobe enough to pass as European.
Think I can pull off the "living on the dole and taking advantage of sweet, sweet public healthcare" look.
'scuse the typos above.
These days, the whole world 'dresses Euro'.
What snobby means is don't dress like an American;
http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/files/2010/10/US-Tourist.JPG
Take anti bacterial wipes to clean the seats. Rumor has it SF'cans can place their naked E coli ridden asses everywhere.
So now that BSnyc's commenteratti realize that snobbie does not really love you as a person but is in fact a money grubbing consumer monkey whore just like the rest of us ...
How does that make you feel?
Angry?
Well I suggest that you all do some epo and roids then find someone much smaller than you and sucker punch them until they lose consciousness. You'll feel great!
That'll be $800.
annoying?
a douche?
...i just saw 'norman, the bicycle riding french sheepdog' on that david letterman thingy & i'm thinking that bsnyc/rtms/wcrm better pick up his game if norman' knows how to write...
...hey, just observing, ya ???...
Yeah, switch off the robot-proofer for Draft.
Oh and... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=so16hOgZxXU
(ZOD)
I really enjoyed the content of your panties, the B.O. monogramed napkins included with the complimentary tasting was a nice touch.
100th Bakfiets
If only their were a service that removed snow in Toronto...
[crickets]
Vegas,
I'm throwing beads your way.
And it was fun to say "jakamo fi na ye" to the cat, but explaining it to my wife was complicated, especially the part about looking it up at work, and why.
Hi admin i do not know how we give any comments on the blogs but we have read your post and i am wordless about your blogs that is a good kind of blogging its really awesome work...
In the future I do not own a flying car.
Snob is busy on Twitter today.
booooo hooooo no snoboooooroooohooo today.
by the way, i dont' care what you say about my musical taste - can't stop listening to dj distance. this track is good for weeednesdays
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMewZkHMmqk
Beads! Beads!
StL has the 2nd largest Mardi Gras in the US after New Orleans. So the beads'll be a flyin' at the parade Saturday & the boobies will be a showin'!
I should clarify that mine won't be showing. It takes more than a lousy strand of beads for the girls to come out & play.
And besides that, I have a race to do Saturday. Oh the smugness! Ha!
321 faffol
good luck on Saturday, Frilly.
It appears that your midriff is acceptable to the Google Hassids.
Plus if you got "Number of Beads=Girth of Breasts" you would need a wheelbarrow.
Well there is that too, cp. Death by beading! Oh the shame!
Yes, the Google goon squad seems to be okay with the amount of skin showing.
Whereas I am happy to reveal mine beads or no...
Oh the life of a shameless trollop.
Babbs, I too am a trollop admittedly. Guess I'm more of a "by request" trollop. Oh now that sounds really bad too! Well, you know what I mean, maybe.
You would love Saturday and Tuesday night. Truly there are many sights to behold.
And the last time I went to the parade, I did end up w/a fair amount of beads w/o showing 'em by skillful catching. Not quite as interesting but less likely to lead to an arrest.
Frilly,
Have a blast Saturday and I hope you don't receive too hard a 'beading' on Tuesday.
Actually, what really interests me is the race you're riding this weekend. Good luck, sunshine!
Thanks MikeWeb. Hopefully I do better than I did last week. Painfully slow. Meh.
And, no no on Tuesday. That is way too much partying on a school night for me. Recovery takes a little bit longer than it used to. Awesome pun, btw.
...does a man or woman who goes to mardi gras just to look at breasts have '...beady eyes...' ???...
...just askin'...
Thanks Babbs. Its running not riding. I've never done just a bike race, always tri-ing. That was bad, I know.
...& i'll wait 'til friday to wish you "...good luck..." on your race, frilly-c so's ya don't get all nervous thinkin' about it ahead of time...
'beady eyes'
Nice one bgw!
Oh I'm not nervous. I've done a race almost every weekend for the last month and a half. Gotta keep motivated somehow, especially when its so freakin' cold and the bed is so incredibly warm. A good reason to get up & get out there.
uhhh...where da podium at ?
c'mon everybody..it's a new day and everything.
is snob the phlegm that holds this motley bunch together ?
I mean holy shit, can't you afford a laptop? Steve Tilford posts EVERY DAY with pictures, from his iPhone.
Also, he's WORLD CHAMP and you're not.
...sad how a '...world champ..." cyclist has to ride the coattails of a bikesnob, when ya think about it...
Tilford also says there wasn't enough waffles at the Worlds.
PURT 'EM ON THE GLASSHHH!!!
Babble @ 1:44pm: prove it.
Frilly @ 1:55pm: consider this a request.
JB: Ok. Here you go.
I would JB, however I fear the Google police would blow up my computer MI style.
Yuppers. Actually, google blew up my chances to make some dosh off of adsense somewhere between this post and my diatribe on the use of that lovely word cunt.
for years the windmill was on both my commute (daly city bart to richmond dist) and lunchtime mtb loop (aka the tour de homelessness). the area around it is a well known casual sex pick-up spot among gay men. at night, i'd always ride on the road to keep from inadvertently plowing over anyone sleeping on the trails.
have fun.
...mmm, soft, warm & wonderfully delicate...
...& yes, i know/imagine what it's/they've been through but still...
Beads to throw and howling to do.
Scranus of Steel
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What's all this talk of whipping things out? I thought this was a bikecycling blogular.
You people need to get your minds out of the sewers and back into the gutters.
Thanks Babbs! I remember that now. It's a bit disembodied though, don't you think? ;)
Fair enough, Frilly. I'll be throwing beads at you during your race.
JB, if it'll get my BUMP moving faster, then bring it!
This will be my last one for awhile and I'd like to do well, but considering my training has been a bit lackadaisical -- yeah, maybe I really do need people throwing things at me.
Look back over the past, with its changing empires that rose and fell, and you can foresee the future too.
whenever I hear someone brag something is incredible, I agree that it is, but I secretly think that they don't know what that word means.
JB - no worries, it's still attached.
And BGW - I don't suppose it's/they've been through more than any other, excepting perhaps the fact that most of us don't fall from 50+ feet.
Needs beads, though.
Attack of the 50 Foot Woman with Saggy Breasts?
ooh...commentariat gets an "asshole" stamp on his "man" card. Well done, sir.
...the only beads i usually carry are the beads of sweat on my forehead & upper lip that i've earned whilst pedalling but your delightful little 'nippers' deserve so much more...
...although.........never mind, not here, not now...
...the quest for appropriate beads begins...
...50+ feet ???...babble, you have a tale to tell...
...the only time i ever fell over 50 feet was when i tripped whilst boarding a bus...& had to offer 25 apologies...ba-da-bump...
Thanks CD, you're a doll.
I think that comment was kindov funny, actually... sagging breasts... 50 ft fall...
BGW -That little kersplatsky is what landed me in a chair for a while.
...ouch, babble...
...in my case, i didn't even get a seat on the bus...
...hadda stand...once i righted myself...
...ironically & absolutely so, we've had weeks of beautiful winter weather as in a lotta sunshine & nice daytime temperatures along with the typical chilly nights...
...bsnyc/rtms/wcrm shows up & the morning of his first video shoot, it drizzles...
...it's been patchy since with big puffy clouds & bits of sunshine & looks to be that way the rest of the day & tomorrow with, again more drizzle...
...to add "...palpably ironic..." to the mix, consider our lad may have a hard time getting back to nyc with that big snowstorm bearing down on the eastern seaboard...
Yikes... another big system for the big apple... safe travels, Wildcat.
In Chicago today, rain, snow, sleet, rain again, snow again, fog, now it's snow again, 33 degrees and falling. Sounds like a slitherfest.
"the muse sat on my face" - one of the best lines I've heard in a while
http://travelswithpops.blogspot.com/
Yeah, really Snob, thanks for bringing the crappy weather with you; I got well soaked riding out this morning. And come on, not even a word for those of us who can't be assed to look at Tweeter?
I had a dream I titty-fuckin' Heather Graham like a baws and she morphed into Meatloaf.
The singer, not the cassarole.
If you need me I will be taking 3 hot showers.
Because I went ahead and "finished up".
A blogger who doesn't update his site while traveling? THERE ARE PEOPLE WHO JUST TRAVEL BLOG! They have internet in San Diego or wherever you said you'd be.
Frilly Chick report to base for Frilly Check.
Babble we also need to verify that nipple length.
It's a scientific fact that women with pronounced external nipples are more horny than their counterparts of the flush-mount variety.
Well, actually it's not but I used to date one.
You just can't beat hands-on experience.
Podium!
Where's the quiz?
Good luck on your race tomorrow, Frilly.
DB
Hey Snobble Doodle Doo.... you should have a stand in for when you're busy with your many book related duties.
I'm taking bets on how long this one will last.
Apparently, not long at all. The Modesty Squad has not fled the approaching storm.
Aced the quiz!
What? Oh. Er, ah...
Say, what the hell happened to that one doofus's hair, in the video there? Does it have anything to do with the condition that caused him to act that way on camera? No healthy, sane person would humiliate him or herself like that.
Babble, the answer is that whatever perversion you posted, it is already down.
That's odd. It's still there on blogspot... Howz this?
What kind of weirdo does not clip-in on a Colnago? Also, Dat Ass.
That was the day I took possession. I was waiting on my shoes.
Yeah, see that. What was so scandalous that required it to be pulled? Did you show your flower basket?
Weird, isn't it? It's a fairly tame post by my standards. I have no idea what happened.
I found a couple of photos last night which I am tempted to post next week, and those might just offend the mod squad.
And since adsense hates me anyway, I might just go there.
Ride well and have a nice weekend everyone. Good luck in your race frilly.
FUNK WHIZ
FREE DAY!
...a limerick-ial poem of common sense & physics - by bikesgonewild...
..."...a tisket, a tasket,
babbles got a brand new basket.
but laws of physics be damned,
in that basket she'll have crammed,
too much stuff which will ultimately trash it..."...
...okay...the wicker looks great on your daily electrababe but study that side photo & think of the 'lever principal' & how any weight in your wicker creates serious stress at the point(s) of contact...
...for eons, old style baskets had two leather straps that directly attached the basket to the handlebar & a third point of contact might be the back edge of the wicker riding against the frame...
...so, without belaboring the point, your electrababe needs some type of rack-like support from beneath which could be simply fashioned & attached to the lower portion of the stem (thus turning with the bars n' basket) & ergo, thus relieving the lever principal & the ensuing stress...
...most baskets, dear heart, no matter their construct, prob'ly go on bikes that get ridden 'lightly' or 'on occasion' & it's no insult to say, that ain't you...
...best of luck for years of riding with your (soon hopefully adapted) "a tisket, a tasket, brand new wicker basket"...
1969 hoowng
Just had to relay that one. Not sure exactly what it is, but I'll try anything twice.
babbles, I think your link was dodgy - I also got a 'not found' message but then clicked your title logo and voila.
Are those the Look compatible pink Chucks?
...frilly chick must be revving up her engine...i mean getting herself psyched for 'the big event'...
...& bsnyc/rtms/wcrm got a reprieve at this end as in big puffy clouds & plenty of sunshine...
...dunno about getting home though...
...just sayin'...
Thank you DB and RCT!
And yep bgw, keepin' it low key tonight so as to be well rested. Tomorrow its supposed to be 50F here, so gonna go for a ride too. Woot!
Not to rub any of the East Coaster's noses in it or anything. We've had our fair share of crappy weather this winter.
NHBUI--still keeping 'em covered.
Good luck on the race, Frilly!
And good luck getting home, Snob. storm sounds bad.
BGW -Actually, the man did adapt the last one, and that's why it lasted so long. Still expired in the end, though.
MikeWeb - That's what the world needs, isn't it? Pink look compatible chucks.
Frilly Chick - run like the wind, girl! We're rooting for you... )
Thanks crosspalms!
And Babbs, you are my all time #1 girl crush! Love the pink chucks and the snakeskin jeans. Girrrrlll!
...i still get 'points' for the poetry, ya ???...
THANK you! xoxoxox
...whewww !!!...nice, now i feel better...
...if i can't be an engineer when i grow up, at least i've got a shot at being a poet...
...captcha bwaha - shadymx 2642...
...i am so NOT a robot...
...leroy ???...dog got your tongue ???...
Faux Friday Fun Quiz.
1. If it rains, take the bus, if it snows, _________
A. Convince your dog and his riding buddies that dog sledding is the new cyclocross.
B. Convince your dog and his riding buddies that in dog sledding the double paceline doesn't rotate.
C. Convince your dog and his riding buddies not to call PETA about dog sledding.
D. Take the A Train.
2. Which is worse:
A. Seeing an old guy in lycra.
B. Being an old guy in lycra.
C. Letting your dog write Question No. 2.
3. If your flight out of SFO is delayed due to weather, a fun way to pass the time at the airport is to
A. Pound Red Bull and Vodka with large guys.
B. Make numerous prank calls Grant Petersen asking to speak with Norm Peterson.
C. Tell Homeland Security screener he reminds you of Kevin James in "Paul Blart, Mall Cop."
D. You Tube karaoke.
4. Fill in the blank: "You know what's awesome, _____ is awesome."
A. Midgets
B. Bakefeets cyclocross
C. a T-Shirt reading "My father met BGW and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt with '...' on it"
5. The proper inflation for road tires in snowy conditions is
A. 110 psi
B. 110 DFU (Diminutive Frenchman Units)
C. 110 oz Cheez Whiz
D. If you have to ask ....
6. Fill in the blank "I would pay Leroy's dog good money to convince Frilly and Babs to post video of scantily clad pillow fight because ______."
A. No way could McFly keep up his clean streak.
B. BGW's pacemaker still under warranty.
C. A dog's gotta eat and Cheetos aren't cheap.
D. Have you ever done something that seemd like a much better idea before you actually went and did it?
Ride safe all!
OMG
PODIUM!!
I think I love you. xo xo
A.
If you left a suspicious-looking package at the Bikesnob video shoot, we have a few questions we would like to ask you.
Leroy, Can you and your dog sub in regularly when Snob is otherwise engaged - that quiz was the best.
In the meantime, still waiting for some eye-witness accounts of video snobular shenanigans in the warm and sunny part of the States
Okay, TSA, it was me, I'm sorry. It seemed like a good idea at the time...
FFFQ +1 Leroy
power prash
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch
or a redeemed social condition;
Ask and ye shall receive. Blessed be.
1 - E-all of the above
2 - D-doing the old guy in lycra?
3 - Red Bull and Vodka with large guys followed by a friendly war game of Die Hard.
4 - C- 'Just sayin' - (BTW: full points for poetry and ++ for design BGW xx)
5 - E -Be careful what you wish for ;)
...wow !!!...when it comes to cooking up & feeding us some tasty 'faux friday'
quiz-ine, there's a new big dog in the kitchen & it's leroy's dog's master...
...major props...
...that was a ladle full of lol, a belly full of bwahaha & straight up gastronomical guffaw...
...once again, my sufficiencies are suffoncified...
...burrrppp !!!...whoops, excuse me...sorry...
1)If Babble On stumbled into your apartment, drunk and horny, at 2 a.m. you would:
A)Suck her nipples like a starving puppy.
B)Like her kitty like it was a pie made out of cake.
C)Acheive optimum vaginal temp/lubricity and initiate Hot Beef Injection.
D)Cuddle
E)Send her packing
That's a tough one. Not the nipple.
A then B then C then A again then D then C then E.
Friday quiz-ine. Heh heh...
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...anon 9:27am...if babble stumbled into my apartment at 2:00am, i doubt she'd be either drunk or horny...
...massively tired from one long, 700+ mile (1130+ kilo) ride, i'm sure, so i'd offer her sustenance, a shower, a massage & then, yes, a warm cuddle & sleep...
...& once recovered, if she was up for 'play', well, i bet together we'd be so much more creative than most of your suggestions...
...but, hey...you work with what ya got, ya ???...
...just sayin'...
...not to imply, of course that our most elegant, if somewhat clumsy-cal babble on would ever wish to 'play' with this old man in lycra...
...i was just, you know, sayin'...
BGW,
You do B) and D) and I will knock out the C).
And the E).
200? Really?
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