If it angers you that I'm taking a week off, rest assured that I will not be skiing down some beach, sunning myself on some snowy mountain, or eating foie gras in some Florentine bistro. Rather, I will be retreating deep within myself, and I can assure you that's no place anybody (I least of all) would want to be. It's dark, it's cold, and there are scary sounds which therapists and spiritual advisors have assured me are simply the house settling but which I can only silence with strong drink.
Also, foie gras is disgusting.
I will, however, return on Monday, October 13th, with regular updates. In the meantime I recommend catching up on routine bike maintenance, spending time with friends and family, and generally tending to your garden in the Voltairean sense.
And if spending time with friends and family involves a large, catered affair, I highly recommend the Grand Prospect Hall in Brooklyn based entirely on the strength of their commercials.
As always, thanks for reading, and I'll see you on Monday October 13th.
--BSNYC/RTMS
Have a good week.
ReplyDeletePodium!
ReplyDeletePodium!
ReplyDeleteNO PODIUM? SUCK MY BALLS, HATERS
ReplyDeleteI love it when a plan comes together . . .
ReplyDeleteI guess I'll have to just Thefixedgeargallery of Fixed Gear Bikes. Thanks a lot snob.
ReplyDeletePS: enjoy your week.
(pushing yahoos off the podium stage)
ReplyDeleteBikesnob is too ashamed to admit it, but he's headed to Kona to watch Ironman and live out all his triathlon fantasies.
ReplyDeletewow this was an early one!
ReplyDeleteI's done good!
ReplyDeletehavent you got a guest writer to put a one word post up every day, so the podium idiots get their fix?
ReplyDeleteGreat, now what do I do for a week. Maybe get some work done.
ReplyDeleteUnathlete: I think he is onto something...
ReplyDeleteAlthough disgusting, I am not sure one would find Fois Gras in Floretine Bistro. I think you would be hard pressed to find Fois Gras in an Italian joint.
Great post and have a great week off.
ant1st!
ReplyDeleteI say we pick some other blog to have our comment races this week.
ReplyDeleteBut but but you just haaaad a vacation. Damn. Now I'll have to work or something.
ReplyDeleteBike snob
ReplyDeleteBike snobbie
Jobbie
Underpants jobbie
Wibbley wobbley
yah you might want to check a french restaurant before a florentine bistro for fois gras.
ReplyDeleteand it's actually super good.
Snob, taking a few days off to observe Yom Kippor is entirely appropriate, so I will send you off with a little High Holiday humor.
ReplyDeleteQ. Why can't you catch a Jew on Yom Kippor?
A. Because... ... they fast.
Veinte!
ReplyDeleteYawn... no... coffee...?
ReplyDeleteThe blog peloton needs a rest week anyway, snobs been pushing and pushing without a break, ...and you wonder why we dope.
ReplyDeleteSnobbatical, kibbutz, tomato, tomato.
Hey ya knobs, foie gras in an Italian place is sarcasm, much like "skiing down some beach" or "sunning myself on some snowy mountain". Get it? Good. AYHSMB.
ReplyDeleteThanks RTMS, you... you snob you. Have a good week.
Kaukauna cheese? Is that cow-cow-na as would be pronounced by Hawaiians, or kah-kah-na as pronounced by nasally mid-westerners?
ReplyDeleteAlso makes great (and tastey) chamois lube.
Tasty chamois lube? I've been looking for that for years!!!
ReplyDeleteEnjoy the week.
Mine's Taint Flavored
ReplyDeleteIT HAS COME! IT HAS COME! The APOCALYPSE HAS COMMENCED!
ReplyDeletehttp://milwaukee.craigslist.org/bik/867422841.html
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!
The geese shall be loosed, the Aerospokes set ablaze. Behold the fixed gear pie plate!!!!
I think BSNYC is going to bury himself in the bowels of the NY Public Library and try to make sense of the new tax code which is part of the bail out plan called Transportation Fringe Benefit to Bicycle Commuters in order to see how he can benefit from this plan without having to move to Portland.
ReplyDeleteOn my Lemondesque-quest to figure out just who BSNYC is, my new guess has 1/9th chance to be right:
ReplyDeleteBSNYC=Clarence Thomas.
1. Clarence Thomas kinda busy for the first week of October, then just kind of mail's it in. Has time on his hands.
2. Non Plussed Journalist is really Clarence Thomas in disguise. This is BSNYC/CT's way of screaming to be noticed.
3. BSNYC "judges" people like tatoo-sleeved-Kevin, Tyler Hamilton and Armund.
4. Didn't Justice Thomas says something similar to "AYHCSMB" to Anita Hill?
5. Didn't it come out in the hearings that Clarence Thomas was a huge Terrance Trent D'Arby fan?
You are SO OUTED BSNYClarence Thomas.
A whole week of behaving myself. Hmmm I don't know, its gonna be tough.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your break snobbie. Mwah (goodbye kiss).
for those looking for something to do and ponder for a week, I humbly suggest, this website of bicycle clothing targeted to lipstick lesbians. The ultimate fixed gear niche.
ReplyDelete"they found some new bits of the bible the other day, I think everyone will like them"
happy sabbatical :)
ReplyDeleteOooh, classic Grand Prospect Hall. I hate the new one. They got all fancy and hired a voice-over actor. I miss the old guy doing the awkward-arm-gesture-while-reciting-phone-number pose. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteHave a good Shabbatical.
ReplyDeletecaaah
ReplyDeleteYou must not be watching the ad all the way through. At the end the old guy and his wife still give the phone number and promise to make your dreams come true. It's on NY1 all the time.
Nice Knog ad. Anybody see the pearl izumi (i think that was the brand, I was slightly distracted) ad in velo news this month?
ReplyDeleteYom Kippur is also referred as the Jewish Festival of Bicycles since driving a car is prohibited during the Day of Judgment the roads are for cyclists.
ReplyDeleteIs it because the Cubs lost?
ReplyDeleteBSNYC,
ReplyDeleteI know how ya feel on taking time to soul search. It's a hard trip but always well worth it. Good luck.
anon 11:09,
ReplyDeleteThe pie plate kills me! hahahaha!!!
"this was professionaly built with no expence spared. Shop maintained. Rides very smooth. All my friends with fixies that ride mine cant believe how smooth everything is compared to theirs. Please serious buyers only."
It rides smooth if and only because of the pie plate's ability to cut down on the rear drag of the bicycle. Easily cuts 10-20 seconds off any ride.
BSNYC -
ReplyDeleteHave a great snobbatical.
For journeys of deep introspection into the dark recesses of the soul, I recommend a miner's lamp and an emergency supply of Haldol.
Works for me.
Of course, a tasty cheese spread that does not require refrigeration is a wise addition in case you need a snack along the way.
One question, though.
Are you planning to return with pictures of journey and, if so, have you packed a camera with a good flash?
It rides so smooth because it's never been ridden past the campus coffee shop; the computer will attest to that.
ReplyDeletelets all race here this week:
ReplyDeletehttp://mini-cooper-parts.blogspot.com
daddo:
ReplyDelete"Comment moderation has been enabled. All comments must be approved by the blog author."
I doubt a car blog will approve a bunch of podium whores.
Wait! U can't retire now, who now is going to snidely comment on Vinokourov's unlikely return to the protour?
ReplyDeletehttp://www.velonews.com/article/83999/guess-who-s-coming-to-dinner-vino--wants-to-rejoin-astana
miss you already
ReplyDeletePiepoli and Schumacher tested positive for CERA.
ReplyDeleteDopestrong!
At last! I can get a bit of rest. I'm so tired; all I do is wait for Snob to post. I wait. I wait
ReplyDeleteHang a sign on the door: Gone Bikin' and switch off the lights on the way out. The rest of us will search for other blogs, for example, Bike Snob New Jersey.
ReplyDeleteanon 2:07, typo!
ReplyDeleteThat's "Big Slob New Jersey".
Piepoli tested positive. I'm shocked, shocked I tells ya.
ReplyDeleteRumor has the numbers ~20 riders about to be announced due to the new CERA testing.
That's what I love about the TDF, it runs all July, but really takes until November until it's really over, and that's not counting legal appeals and denials and excuses, which push well into the next spring , just a few weeks away from..the TDF.
Anywhoo...I need the time off to establish my new doping excuse consulting company, Intended Evil Twin Dog Never Tested Positive Inc.
I lost my black Specialized Crosstail Sport on the Upper West Side near Yogi's at 76th and Broadway. If anyone sees it let me know.
ReplyDeleteThanks,
Neil
John 10:46 (Bible reference?)
ReplyDelete"sunning myself on some snowy mountain"
I have been told that snowy mountains and sunshine can cause things such as sunburn within in your nostrils and underneath your chin (or chins, in my case).
Ask a springtime skier or snowshoer about these things.
The albido of snow is mighty.
Anyway... I'll check in after a while. Go enjoy yourself, BSNYC.
And good luck to you, Neil.
(aka Anon. 3:05)
commiecanuck,
ReplyDeleteDid you notice the knuckle-lettering on the glove of the dominant lipstick lesbian?
Of course you did!
lisptic knuckles
Whither the fudge will this trend cease?
I swear... this viral marketing attack that you former colonials are launching against America is mighty sneaky!
Who will bring joy to the children now?
ReplyDeleteDid you think of them, the children?
Did you?
Enjoy the holiday!
ReplyDeleteYou take more holidays than B&H!
ReplyDeleteI love the love/hate gloves. They're going on the top of my Christmas list, red please.
ReplyDeleteI coulda used that hate glove for the asshat who was trying to hang on my wheel Saturday. I'm not even fast so it was just annoying.
btw, commie, I am curious to know what its like to kiss somebody with an earring in her lip. And I'll be seriously disappointed if Fab C shows up on that list.
http://www.knog.com.au/Category.aspx?categoryId=10
ReplyDeleteI'd hit that.
Damn! I'm with you on that one. Her girlfriend's pretty cute too.
ReplyDeleteI think Snobby works on Wall Street and took his cut of the $700B and ran.
ReplyDeleteEither that or he runs Lehman Brothers and is getting drilled by congress on why he made so much damn money losing everyone's money.
ReplyDelete...ultimately feeling usurped & indignant by the "return of lance" bsnyc/rtms forces himself away, indulging in a week-long 'snobbatical', while hoping to make a 'comeback' himself, refreshed, vehement & better appreciated by the teeming masses that infiltrate his daily blog...
ReplyDelete...upon his return, there will be a celebration at the 'grand prospect hall' in brooklyn w/ featured valet bike parking...
...the fete will be sponsored by kaukauna & 'kaukauna spreadable cheese' will be served but it's strictly a "byoc" (bring yer own crackers) affair...no foie gras or it's 'florentine' equivalent, liver spread will be allowed in the hall...
...bsnyc/rtms will be present but like the wizard in the 'wizard of oz', he'll be behind the curtain, as usual...
...rsvp...
So if geese fly though pie plates and shred themselves into foie gras should we care . Frills , some gals, likely at Lipstick Gals , have em in all kinda nooks and grannies. Like a naughty game of hide and seek.
ReplyDeleteHide and seek can be fun. AP, you have been on a bit of a roll here lately, feeling your oats, are ya?
ReplyDeleteI really do like those gloves--sums up my state of affairs nicely. Day old danish anyone?
I eat foie gras, like, four times a day.
ReplyDeleteIt is spring here so my inner Tommke is blossoming
ReplyDeleteThats really cute & I bet a sight to see. Sheilas be warned.
ReplyDeleteMaybe thats my problem--no more summer lovin'. At least the weekends have been nice. Saturday was awesome, lycra everywhere. I rode a little longer than planned & paid for it Sunday. But, mmmm, well worth the effort.
Tell the Queen of England I said Hi!
ReplyDeleteWhere can I see these moose knuckle tattoos everybody keeps posting about?
ReplyDeleteNobody was able to read into snob's plan to go to Vegas for the week and catch Yngwie Malmsteen's "Perpetual World Tour", October 10th. With his derision and extensive knowledge of other metal, there's no way a snob like him would miss it.
ReplyDeleteCheck the calendar of events:
here
Snob, I'd like to say I'll miss you, but my new Moots just got in today. I'll be preoccupied, to put it mildly.
ReplyDeleteYour return WILL, however, make a lovely birthday present.
He's gone on vacation, and misses this
ReplyDeletehttp://orangecounty.craigslist.org/bik/868940443.html
Send your share of the foie MY way!
ReplyDeletebk jimmy--
ReplyDeleteTrue, they still say it, but its just the audio. I need that part where he just keeps. holding. arm. up.
Snob on Vacation
ReplyDeleteBGW,
ReplyDeleteI will attend. I'll be dressed as the tin man, in search of a heart, that is.
A
Or win da race like Haole
ReplyDeleteIn Snobby's absence, we all need something to laugh at:
ReplyDeletehttp://boise.craigslist.org/bik/850780176.html
@12:23,
ReplyDeletethat's a good one. No picture? And what's a 60-63 roadbike? Best quote:
"If you need a roadie, and you don't buy this you're a tool."
Here's a Denver entry:
http://denver.craigslist.org/bik/858325786.html
Foie gras isn't any more disgusting than a Purdue chicken that's pumped up with antibiotics and debeaked before it's killed. At least the duck raised for foie gras is fed a simple diet of fat and corn and is allowed to waddle freely before its liver is harvested. The process of force-feeding a duck (gavage) to get this result may be inhumane, but foie gras really isn't any more disgusting than any of the other meat that carnivores consume without thinking about feces and feedlots in Nebraska. Or perhaps BKNYC was being ironic and he actually likes nothing more than to sear up some hunks from a lobe of foie gras and down it with some bargain swill.
ReplyDeleteHas BSNYC noticed the perilous half finished bike lane slowly coming together on 9th Avenue? No one knows what to make of any of it.
@ 12:35
ReplyDeleteWhy upside down pics?
53:13 is pretty good though...
ant1st!
ReplyDeleteand you thought america is bad:
ReplyDeletehttp://auckland.craigslist.org/bik/835144611.html
For those of you who have never had foie gras, it's like a cross between butter and bacon (aka the two tastiest foods in the whole wide world). It's meat, tasty, and spreadable like butter. It goes great with champagne. The process of making it is actually a little more "inhumane" than previously described. The force feeding causes the duck or goose's liver to go crazy and kill the animal. Kind of like an alcoholic. I'm sure that if given the choice, all animals would choose to die that way. It's a lot more fun than an air hammer.
ReplyDeleteI prefer just cooking Bacon-Bits in butter, blending, then spreading. Who cares if quadrupeds suffer...
ReplyDeleteThat person in Denver with the big thighs and the foresight must be trying to pay for some knee surgery.
ReplyDeleteLIGA MENT
ReplyDelete...lucky 7...cool...
ReplyDelete...if i had a pair of those new wild looking '09 red ergo2 sidi's i suppose i could show up as dorothy...
...(i'd do a link but i don't know HOW to do a direct link...check 'em out @ velonews, interbike stuff)...
...but then i'd also hafta get one a those natty plaid cyclo-cross kilts (tis the season) & borrow a little dog...
Motherland has bailed out Iceland. We have plenty the money and can give them to you too in trade of Ukraine, Moldova and maybe Romania. Romanians such bad fighters not sure they are worth money but we give money for them anyway not to hurt their feelings.
ReplyDeleteNo like the eyes of Mr. Nonplussed. We like steely eyes that mean business and willing to quiet down people who disrupt Unity. We like eyes of Obama. He like a goalkeeper. Nothing gets by him.
I'd gladly pay $1k to ruin my knees while not showing off by riding around on a not-Pista fixed-gear. Does it count toward the pistadex when it's hiding it's name?
ReplyDeleteI like how in dmitri fofonov's posts the grammer wavers between faux-Russian and Incredible Hulk.
ReplyDeleteHULK NO LIKE EYES. HULK SMASH JOURNALIST!
grammar. dadburn it.
ReplyDeleteDear Bike Snob,
ReplyDeleteI saw your photo...but you don't fool me.
-me
Only in Boise is $500 ten percent of $1800.
ReplyDeleteand he's calling us a bunch of tools
He had a longer and better ride than most, but like Upper Class, Anon 2:11, Kevin Ft. Meyers, and a series of others before, Fofonov is simply becoming tiresome.
ReplyDeleteThat Boise Craigslist poster sounds like he's a Meth Head! He probably killed the people who live in the house and he is trying to sell off some stuff to buy Meth before he gets caught.
ReplyDeletebk jimmy
ReplyDeleteKazakhstan is home of Hulk, who speaks Russian. Copulate testicles.
This is just Bizzare..
ReplyDeletehttp://velospace.org/node/14227
Century!
ReplyDeleteBGW- '09 red ergo2's = YUMMY. Looks like Dorothy's finally gonna get a beatdown shoe jackin' from the tin man. They're red like a heart. Good enough for me!!
A
Century podium!
ReplyDeleteHere's the link:
http://www.velonews.com/photo/83748
Delicious bloody shoes, sucka.
A
Check this out - SS for US$118000
ReplyDeletehttp://www.cyclingnews.com/tech.php?id=/photos/2008/tech/news/10-06/gallery-10-06
...lucky 7...
ReplyDelete...while those shiny red erg's are wild crazy awesome, i'm quite content w/ my simple white erg's...very classy, high end sidi's just make one's feet dance on the pedals...
...btw, even at my age, my good bike has a skull & crossbones, a red heart & a 5 integrated into a design...special significance thingy...
BGW,
ReplyDeleteYeah, I hear ya about the good dancin' shoes. How about those 98 Dominators w/ 96K? Seen a few waltzes, methinks.
http://www.velonews.com/photo/83749
Life & Death Lucky 5 bike tattoo for the bike? Hell yeah! Gotta pic?
A
Horward Stern and KATG are both on snobatical with BSNYC?
ReplyDeleteat least I still have...?
Anon 10:11, do you think that Howard Stern and Bike Snob are one in the same, or is the timing just some strange cosmic coincidence?
ReplyDeleteAnon 10:45, I could care less who may be whom. I think the big biker in the sky is toying with me; all of my favorite daytime distractions are away for the week.
ReplyDeletewhy? WHY?!
Anon 10:11
have a good vacay, snob
ReplyDeleteHI BIKESNOB,
ReplyDeleteI have been looking everywhere for brakelights/turn signals for my singlespeed and came across these: http://www.brakenutz.com/
I'm a girl. Do you think it would be too much?
Your style advice much appreciated,
- Ms. Bike Accessorizer from Boston
...L to the 7th...those dom's is done...
ReplyDelete...nah, no fotos...pretty personal stuff...if someone sees & asks, i'm glad to tell 'em, but ya, definite "life n' death" logo...
...don't really need a tat, at this stage of my life, but if i did, this'd be the one...
...it's not a reminder, but a tribute to the fact that i'm alive & can still work my ass off on the bike...
...& i'm gonna go climb a few thousand feet right now, as a matter a' fact...
Critical Ass,
ReplyDeleteThe guy selling the R900 on craigslist said he paid "something like" $1800. I suppose that, technically speaking, $5000 is "something like" $1800, in that both start with a dollar sign, and end in a couple zeros. But the insults certainly made me want to seal the deal with him. He's definitely got a future in customer relations.
Skid
I agree that the seller has a shitty attitude but in some businesses such as indie record stores, being an asshole is a prerequisite for being a sales clerk. I worked in one in college and we treated our customers like shit. Come to think of it, maybe the seller should try to find employment at a local bike shop. There are a couple here in Denver that could use a clerk with his rapport.
ReplyDeleteant1st!
ReplyDeletePoulidor of 10/09/2008!!!
ReplyDeletehttp://flickr.com/photos/catsloveboxes/2924109055/
ReplyDeleteI love BikeSnob! tomhauser.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteCome back rested and cynical.
ReplyDeletehttp://shadycyclist.blogspot.com/
Nice Post. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteYou dudes and ladies heard the Fofonov verdict. 3 months. F'ing puritans. A little fofonov never made anyone go blind.
ReplyDeleteActually, Ant1 had that conversation with his young son recently. It went like this:
ReplyDeleteAnt1: "Son, if you don't stop it, you'll go blind."
Son: "Dad, I'm over here."
...merckx:
ReplyDeleteCan you post that in Braille?
Hey C-Ass, have you seen this argument going on clist? Funny.
ReplyDeletehttp://denver.craigslist.org/search/bik?query=single+speed+motobecane+RE&minAsk=min&maxAsk=max
woogie woogie
ReplyDeletehttp://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2008/10/09/fashion/20081009_BIKES_5.html
ReplyDeleteI thought this was great.
Anon 1:44:
ReplyDeleteYes. I peeped that in the paper yesterday. It's not the worst I've ever seen, but they missed the most common biker in NYC, not to mention the kind that's not white. The Food Courier.
...Jesse Ashlock, 30, a fashion magazine editor who lives in Greenpoint, Brooklyn, rides a Bianchi Pista that cost $660 with upgrades.
Note: the Pistadex is at 550 in NYC. I'm assuming the "upgrade" would be the extensive Little Lord Fauntleroy Pose training.
BEAR BULL
ReplyDeleteJohn,
ReplyDeleteYep, I was trolling CL for a cheap 531 or Columbus frame and ran across the discussion yesterday. I have no idea why a single speed would have only one brake. On a fixie at least you can skid to a stop like a cool guy if the front brake fails. With a freewheel you would be kinda fucked...sorta like a brakeless fixie with a broken chain.
Did you catch the thread with some clown trying to sell bikes he bought from bikesdirect.com for twice their list price? Someone did it with a Windsor Hour, and the latest was a Motobecane record.
ReplyDeleteI miss you Bike Snob
ReplyDeleteBurning Down The House - why we are in the financial mess today
ReplyDeleteThis is 10 minutes long but it went fast. Very interesting.
If you agree(makes you mad), pass it on.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RZVw3no2A4&feature=iv&annotation_id=event_597487
The one place I go to for a diversion from the political crap that pervades everything and I get assailed by the propaganda bs spewed out by jerkoffs like "burning down the house..."
ReplyDeleteHere's the rebuttal anyway...
http://www.slate.com/id/2201641/
Bike Snob,
ReplyDeleteDo you think you could evaluate my bike. I am at www.osobike.com
Shane Stock
Laredo, TX
waiting, waiting, waiting,....
ReplyDeleterefresh, refresh, refresh,....
ReplyDeletewww.mikeonhisbike.blogspot.com
You know that snob's been gone a week when shameless blog-promotion and politik appear in the comments more than knuck-tat ideas and ayhsmb references.
ReplyDelete