Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Worst of NYC Craigslist Bike Ads #14 and #15

Well, the riders in the Tour aren't the only ones on drugs. There's clearly some serious substance abuse among the local riders selling their bikes on Craigslist as well. If you're looking to open a bicycle freakshow out in Coney Island before it's redeveloped, here's a brace of audaciously-priced bicycles that will round out your Stable of Horrors:

Cannondale Road Bike [original URL: http://newyork.craigslist.org/brx/bik/381118601.html]
Reply to: [deleted]
Date: 2007-07-24, 1:29PM EDT
Cannondale Road Bike, Color white, New Tires, Brakes, Grips, Chain, etc. The bike just had a tune up 2 weeks ago. Runs in excellent condition/ very fast. Selling the bike w/ the stand, bike mini carrying pouches, speed o meter and Air pump.
For Sale $1500 negotiable.
Interested Call: [deleted]
Open to Serious Buyers
OK, this asking price is stunning, though it's negotiable of course. You have to love that boneheaded negotiating tactic--start with an absurdly high asking price in hopes of negotiating down to a ridiculously high selling price. He must be a NYC realtor. Then again he may be on to something--anyone dumb enough to even consider this bike at that price probably can't read the word "negotiable." Another hallmark of the Craigslist scrap-metal purveyor is mentioning the name of the color and then further explaining that that's in fact the color of the bike, as in: "blue in color," or "red in color." Here he says it's "color white." Thanks, just "white" would have been enough. People like this generally go on to say something about how the bike "runs," and this one's no exception. Bikes don't run! Cars run. Motorcycles run. People who have bought crappy Cannondales on Craigslist run after their bike falls apart and they have no other way to exercise. Then again, this bike does come with what appears to be an ammonia bottle on the downtube, in addition to a pair of simply mind-boggling handlebars. These bars were either built by Shiva the Destroyer or a very sentimental Irishman. If you buy this, just be careful not to get your head stuck in there.



--dabikejack--Vintage Peugeot Road Conversion - $350 (East Village) [original URL: http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/bik/381111244.html]
Reply to: see below

Date: 2007-07-24, 1:19PM EDT
White, vintage Peugot Road conversion. Fixed or free wheel (flip-flop hub). 22 inches/48cm. Bull horn handlebars, leather saddle, black rims, yellow tires. Very good condition. For pickup, but will ship or deliver at additional cost.
Call Shane: [deleted]

$350? Come on. This is the most pathetic thing from France I've seen since Christophe Moreau. And who the hell is actually going to want this thing shipped to them? If this showed up at my house I'd move.

52 comments:

  1. You have no email address available here, so I'll have to ask in a comment. I'm a photographer working on a culture study of the bicycle. How can I contact you? tedwardglazar@wavecable.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Check the author's profile, Mr. Photographer Genius! There's an email link right in there, ready to receive hatemail from all those fixie hipsters who get burned here on a daily basis...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Now if only I could get $1500 for my old Cannondale. Judging by the goofy bars and aero water bottle, I'm guessing that this guy was all about triathlons for a few months back in '92. And why not try to sell it for the original purchase price? It's not like it's been ridden much.

    ReplyDelete
  4. oh yeah, bikesnob you've done it again, you sure know how to hit 'em where it hurts, where do you come up with this stuff?
    oh oh next blog should be about how fixed gear riders all dress alike! ha ha, I'm L'ing OL, c'mon tight jeans? tight shirt? what is this a fashion show? ha ha did your mom buy you those vans? zing!
    too much grindcore on the IPOD? boo yah! I'll bet he just rides that "fixie" to the trendy bar!!, I'm saying all of these things in my head in what I imagine to be your voice and its fucking funny
    see you in church!

    ReplyDelete
  5. seriously, the pope, there is such a thing as too much sarcasm.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sarcasm is usually funny. I'd say that someone needs to start their own blog, rather than trying to troll for laughs in another's venue.

    Anyway, the blog is always appreciated here, and taken with the appropriate dosage of salt!

    ReplyDelete
  7. The bars on that Cannondale are gonna look so fresh chopped and flipped on my new 3rensho. I'd run 'em bare but I think first I'm gonna have them anodized pink to really make the bike pop.

    It's like that.

    ReplyDelete
  8. "These bars were either built by Shiva the Destroyer or a very sentimental Irishman. If you buy this, just be careful not to get your head stuck in there."

    HA HA HA....oh man, that's rich, that's just goddamn funny. HA HA.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I just saw an ebay track bike where someone actually drilled through the top tube for aero cable routing. Unbelieveable.

    ReplyDelete
  10. please help us bike snob! the fashionistas and fixie hipsters are spreading... agh!!! it's so gay! before long city councils everywhere will outlaw fixies because some coner oberst look-a-like runs into an old lady in the crosswalk because he can't stop.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Know it is as 'cracklist'.

    I really love any ad that states the original or new price of an item. It indicates the seller is not aware of how markets actually work. In the market, buyers do not happily fork over a special premium just for the sentiment attached to one's used crap.

    ReplyDelete
  12. ccrider
    "oberst": thanks for the new word for the day. I'll use it with the boss.

    (by the way nice reference to a decent pre-corn RC number)

    ReplyDelete
  13. c_c_rider-

    I can't believe I made it through the first minute of that. I guess I was hoping to see Will Farrell or someone. Holy Jesus.
    Los

    ReplyDelete
  14. We're supposed to accept critical sarcasm from someone who hasn't seen very early TT bars before and thinks an old campy aero water bottle is amonia?
    I generally only find sarcasm funny if the writer actually knows what they are talking about.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous,

    You don't have to accept anything. Of course I realize it's old aero equipment. But of all cycling equipment the aero stuff arguably ages the worst. To me, yesterday's wind-cheater is today's goofy relic. (Actually, even the cutting edge current aero stuff is goofy to me.)

    Sorry it didn't work for you. I'm sure are funnier cycling blogs with more knowledgeable authors out there.

    --BSNYC

    ReplyDelete
  16. " Anonymous said...

    Check the author's profile, Mr. Photographer Genius! There's an email link right in there, ready to receive hatemail from all those fixie hipsters who get burned here on a daily basis..."

    Leave the snobbery to the snob, as you're not so witty at it.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Jesus! Does that thing have downtube shifters?! It's probably an aluminum frame. He probably bought it after renting "American Flyers" at Blockbuster.

    ReplyDelete
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  21. This asking price is stunning, though it's negotiable of course. You have to love that boneheaded negotiating tactic start with an absurdly high asking price in hopes of negotiating down to a ridiculously high selling price.

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